Santa's Sack

by Nicole Parker, Unfortunate Reads

Last year, disaster struck when Santa Claus was kidnapped and taken to Halloweenville. This year, the Seasonal Symposium Officials are putting protective measures in place.

Except…

Santa and his captor, Sackman, inadvertently discovered they shared dark carnal proclivities. They will do whatever it takes to ensure a repeat performance this year, but will just one night be enough?

No one expects Santa to beg to be on the naughty list.

Santa’s Sack is a parody (sentient object adjacent) romance intended for audiences over 18 years old. This story contains intimate relations between a sack/man and Santa. Check interior content considerations for a full list of information, and read at your own risk!

Genres: Christmas, Novella, M M Romance

92 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 15, 2024

About the author

Nicole Parker is the author of creative and humorous romance stories. She is a 30-something California native who spends the great majority of her free time writing books, reading books, or organizing her ever growing TBR list. She also has a spouse, some kids, and pets, but this isn't about them. Nicole's books are funny, raunchy, silly, and most importantly full of good vibes and happy endings.

Reviews

[Kristina · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’ve never seen so many Christmas puns in one place before. And straight to jail for that use of gummy worms, STRAIGHT TO JAIL.





**************************

No tentacles, just gummy worms.







I’m scared this has tentacles in it…oh well. No risk, no rewards.

[MissBecka Gee · Rating 5 out of 5]

I went into this expecting some giggles and the possibility of it either ruining one of my all time favourite movie characters, or making him even better.
To take that kidnapping scene with minimal screen time and turn it into a sexy sexy story with SandyClause & SackDaddy?
Brilliant!
This had a lot more feels wrapped up in than I anticipated and definitely had all the giggles I hoped for.
Highly recommend this to anyone who wants to read a weird and heartwarming story.
Or if you just wanna question how messed up your brain is.
Either way, give this one a go!

[Biblio · Rating 5 out of 5]

Listen up you holiday horndogs this is THE Holiday read of the year. I'm calling it. Get ready for Lollicock, glitter cummilations, inappropriate use of corporate messaging systems, red velvet, gummy worm (rings), pom poms gags, licorice lashings, puckered... things, and so much more. Cassie and Nicole took Christmas to the next level with puns and kinks galore. Hope you like your Christmas trees flocked.

[Tia · Rating 4 out of 5]

We had Sack Daddy deep inside Santa AND BONUS the tooth fairy getting f*cked with a gavel…. Merry Christmas!

[Melinda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read this when you’re in need of the best kind of holiday distraction, lots of Christmas puns, and spice that while have you questioning things about yourself. WHY WAS THIS SO HOT? I was cackling by the end of this one. You’ll never think of Santa and a certain Sack Man the same again.

[christy - pr0bablyreadingsmut · Rating 5 out of 5]

i don’t know what i was expecting but it….wasn’t that. but i freaking LOVED IT!!!! the most perfect, spicy, hilarious holiday themed novella. everyone read this rn and cackle with me

five sack daddy stars

[Tiffany Kerr · Rating 5 out of 5]

always a delight

The creativity of these two - it's beyond amazing. Is it a little weird to think of oogyboogy and Santa together? Sure. But I'm unhinged enough and the banter is delightful enough to not think too hard and just enjoy the ride.

[K · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 stars! Absolutely hilarious! I loved it.

[High Lady of Delulu · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5
This read like a very fun, very hot thought experiment 😌 the level of word play is impressive. And honestly, can’t blame Santa. That sack daddy has been on my hear-me-out-list for quite a while.

[Michelle Lebron · Rating 5 out of 5]

When a book tells you to read it at your own risk, this is one of those 🤣. Nicole and Unfortunate Reads are the best dynamic duo I’ve read; this story of Santa and the Sackman will blow your mind—you’ll never see Santa the same way again 🤣. I couldn’t stop laughing and was cracking up with this book, gasping at every spicy scene; it’s legit. There’s as much spice in this book as in Santa’s endless sack of gifts. It was a wild ride: the Halloween world falling for the Christmas world, with the two main characters crazy about each other. Santa has been very, very naughty—he’s definitely on the naughty list. If he’s on it, there’s nothing wrong with us being on it too; I just hope Santa doesn’t see my Kindle history this year 👀. In this spicy Christmas special, Santa will be exploding with glittering joy, the best puns, a Sackman Daddy, and a touch of sweetness—perfect for transitioning from Halloween to Christmas in the best way possible.

[Aria Maze · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Here comes Santa Claus.”

Ever watched Nightmare Before Christmas and wondered, what if Oogie Boogie and Santa fucked?

Well Nicole and Cassie did and they gave us this spectacularly weird parody of it. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to laugh or give in to it. Ya know?

The Christmas puns??? Thinking of Sackman bending Claus over and having his way with him?

It’s a Christmas miracle and I’m here for it.

[Cecelia🐈‍⬛ · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a wild ride & I enjoyed every moment of it 😂

[_Melrose.reads · Rating 3 out of 5]

Book clubs unhinged book of the month did not disappoint haha

[Jessica Steed · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5🌟 3.5🌶️
Well I didn't know that I needed a smut book with Santa and Oogie Boogie (op excuse me Sack Man) but now I fear I can't live without it. Mainly because it penetrated to the core of my brain and I think it lives there forever now. I don't know if I'll ever watch certain Nightmare Before Christmas scenes the same way again now that I know what Sack Man be packing down there 🤯 🍭
Laughed the whole time and thoroughly enjoyed myself! This will be my favorite unhinged Christmas book recommendation!!

[Samantha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely ridiculous and absolutely perfect. So dumb and hilarious.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lollicock 🤣🤣

[Virginie · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 ⭐️

Unfortunate Reads and Nicole Parker have teamed up again after the hilarious Fully Charged . Like the first book they wrote together, Santa's Sack is a parody with a sentient object and is just as well done.

The story is both hilarious and extremely spicy. I don't know how the two authors come up with so many inventive ideas and amusing puns, but I take my hat off to them, because this book at least has the merit of putting a smile on your face while you're reading it.

[Gnome Patronus · Rating 5 out of 5]

You know that movie some of us watched where Santa was kidnapped and taken to a very demanding, Rough Canvas man? Did you ever wonder what really happened when they were left alone? What could they have been getting up, down, in and around to? I mean, our Jolly Cheerful Santa who is quick to please people all over the world, and then the Bossy, take control Sackman…what in all the magic lands could they have in common? Ever wonder what all those Halloween Treats that couldn’t be contained inside the Sackman could do? Yep, read this and get your answers my friend!

[Rach at Monstrous.LoveBites · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Spice: 🌶🌶🌶🌶

I knew the kind of chaos I was getting into, and STILL was not prepared. 😅 This was absolutely unhinged and SO INSANELY FREAKING HOT?!?! Because, whattt? This actually makes so much sense.
Santa Claus and Sackman are the ultimate holiday power couple, and I will stand by that statement forever. ❤️
It will never cease to amaze me the sheer amount puns Cassie and Nicole can come up with together. Like, my holiday vocabulary is forever changed.
Now, "come on, my little tinsel tart, let’s get you cleaned up.”
You're going to need it after this one.

Expect:
🎅 Not boring meetings
🐛 Gummy worm c*ckrings
🎅 Forbidden romance
🐛 Glitter & flavored 💦

[Allisha (Lady_Perfictionist) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nicole and Cassie did it again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This books was so funny! It is the best holiday paradoy that I needed. The puns and the forbidden love will never have me thinking of Santa and/or "Sackman" the same way again!

If you need something MM, spicy, and full of amazing banter go grab this now!

[Michaela Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

This Christmas, Santa just wants his Sack Daddy under his tree and Sackman just wants his sugar plum to come down his chimney. Santa’s Sack is ridiculously funny, strangely hot and full of Christmas cheer! Unfortunate Reads and Nicole Parker are outlandishly iconic together. I knew this was going to be one wild sleigh ride and they did not disappoint!! This Christmas parody romance had me laughing, swinging my feet (bc who knew Sackman could be so sweet) and left me wondering if I’m mentally sane at all. Probably not y’all, and that’s okay; because if loving Sack Daddy and his boss leather daddy is wrong, I don’t want to be right.

[Robyn G · Rating 5 out of 5]

The puns alone was 5 star worthy for me LOL
This was a ride. A wild ride.
Hold on to your santa hats because Sackman is something.
I mean it felt kind of ominous when both authors are like *Patrick we're rooting for you gif* and this was definitely not what I was expecting but ALSO WAS what I was expecting from Unfortunate Reads and Nicole Parker.
Definitely read at your own risk LOL

[Alex S · Rating 5 out of 5]

A quick and spicy novella featuring a crossover of Christmas and Halloween. Santa Claus and Oogie Boogie basically! I didn’t know I needed this!

Not a lot of plot but basically forbidden romance, dom/sub, degradation, detailed spicy scenes, and flavoured 💦 (if you know Nicole Parker, you know flavoured is her calling card)! Pumpkin spice spice baby 🥵

[buzzcutbiblio · Rating 5 out of 5]

RTC, just like Santa did ✨

[Poetry Drive · Rating 5 out of 5]

Turning daily mundane corporate tasks into something this hilarious is ingenious: Text Exchange Application for Merriment Symbols (TEAMS). DEAD. The euphemisms are comedic gold and honestly, something I could totally see some mom from the Midwest saying— “Galloping gum drop son of a snowman!” They are certainly Batman & Robin worthy exclamations.

☠️ ☠️ ☠️ ☠️
My favorite line out of the whole book?
“My Christmas tree is about to be flocked.”
☠️ ☠️☠️☠️

Noteworthy idioms and nicknames:
-Sack Daddy
-Rainbow Rod
-Little Tinsel Tart
-Lollic*ck
-Filthy Frosty

I don’t want to give too much away, but if you’re looking for a laugh and escape from reality, give this short Holiday parody a read!

[Brooke · Rating 3 out of 5]

Unhinged bookclub pick for this month and wow
All I can say is wow. I was not expecting that and the ending picture was great 😂

[Books & Burnouts · Rating 4 out of 5]

I knew I was going to be in for the sleigh ride of my life in the first 2 pages of this book. All I can say is buckle up gumdrop because this book is going to take you on a wild ride filled with laughter, giggles, blushing, maybe some tears, and a whole lot of "What in the Gingerbread man is going on?!" thoughts. Christmas will absolutely never be the same after reading this book! Available now on Kindle Unlimited!

[Mackenzie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oogie Boogie - esque sack-man and Santa Claus—the naughty list of our dreams? Sleigh, yeah!

The spice is 🌶️ SPICY 🌶️
Santa is NAUGHTY
The Sack is Daddy

What more could we ask for out of a holiday parody filled with some enemies to lovers angst, naughty list behavior, and a little cinnamon roll behavior to top it all off?!

Christmas puns and kink all the way to Santa’s South Pole — buckle your sleigh belt because Santa and this sack are quite the ho-ho-ho’s.

[Monica · Rating 5 out of 5]

Santa's Sack is everything I love about sentient object romance. I know I say that a lot, but it's true every time. Nicole Parker and Unfortunate Reads teamed up to write another completely bonkers story, this time featuring Santa and an Oogie Boogie-like Sackman. Spicy yet ridiculously funny, loaded with puns. I laughed so hard my cheeks hurt. Super fun.

[Carla · Rating 5 out of 5]

Alrighty then! lol

This was surprisingly good. Great plot. Forbidden love. Secret lovers. SPICY!
All wrapped up in a bag tied up with a big red bow.