A Rotten Girl

by J. Ursula Topaz

Pearl is a trans woman writer on the cusp of literary greatness... or so she thought until her agent informs her that her first book has sunken like a stone for its failure to "connect with normal people". Normal people. Heterosexual people. Cisgender people.

Jaded from the knowledge that this industry rarely lets in people like her, Pearl comes up with a plan: write a commercial male/male romance. Except the market's all about authenticity these days, isn't it? The plan gets complicated, drawing her into a web of escalating deceptions where she poses as a cisgender gay man and comes ever closer to destroying all her relationships, and her own life.

A Rotten Girl is a satirical drama that explores gender, public personas, the commodification of queerness—and the reality of what it is like to be a trans woman in a hostile world.

Genres: Transgender, LGBT, Queer

185 pages, Kindle Edition

Published January 2, 2025

Reviews

[lauraღ · Rating 5 out of 5]

There is something hard to explain about putting yourself—in book form—out there. Oh, a fictionalised me, and a fictionalised life, but me in the important ways. To dissect your faults and your foibles, to anatomize your desires and dreams, and to present that to the world. And for the world to go, “Meh.”

4.5 stars. I absolutely loved this. The reading experience was kind of anxiety-inducing and kinda stressful, but it was also delightful at the same time. It kind of reminded me of reading Everyone in this Room Will Someday be Dead by Emily R. Austin, which also featured a main character telling a bunch of lies and making a bunch of bad decisions; a main character who you couldn't help but root for, even when things got really messy. That was absolutely Pearl in this book. Be prepared to whisper 'girl, stop' several times. 

Pearl is an author whose first book, unfortunately, tanked. She thought it was pretty good, but her agent tells her that she needs to write stuff that will connect with "normal people"; i.e., straight, cis people.  So Pearl, a lesbian trans woman, concocts a plan where she cooks up an online identity as cis gay man, and writes a stupid but fun romance novel about two cis gay guys falling in love, engineered to appeal to women. Mostly fujos. This is a satirical mess (complimentary) that takes us through a few months of Pearl's life, how she carries out her deception, the various lies that she has to engineer, the way it affects her personal life and relationships, while intermittently giving us snippets of the romance novel that she wrote. It was so excellent. An exploration of the continually shifting goalposts that trans women have to face, both online and in real life, as well as a look into certain bookish spaces and the type of people who lord over them. There are wonderful side characters and punchable antagonists. The book stressed me out so bad, but it was also, like, really funny. Which is a skill. As always, I love books about authors, about the writing process, about the publishing world, and this had a lot of interesting insight and commentary. I liked when it would get a little meta, or when it would comment on writing itself. If you're invested in having a likeable main character, then Pearl is probably going to frustrate you. She's a teensy bit annoying and she makes a lot of bad decisions. But her imperfections also make the book what it is, and by the end, you're completely invested and on her side.   

I can't overstate how much I liked reading this, even when it stressed me out. It was snappy, propulsive, with a witticism on every page. I keep remembering little things and then I have to pause and giggle. (Casement and Ukebridge... LORD.) Sometimes when a book references too many different things, it can feel a little too scattered or unfocused, but this hit the perfect balance. I flew through it. I do think I wanted to see a little bit more of Barbs (hot sweet butch gf) and I can't help but wish that it was a little bit longer. But overall this was great. I haven't stopped thinking about it since I finished, and I kinda wanna get the audiobook and reread it.

Content warnings: transmisogyny, slurs, misgendering, brief suicide ideation
 

“Centrism is a trap,” said Barbs, “with an invisible ratchet taking you step-by-step into the beast’s maw. We have to be guerrillas, ninjas, vampires. Supping from the beast when it is mostly safe to do so, but never forgetting it is the enemy.”

[Sam · Rating 5 out of 5]

A satirical, but very honest look at the publishing industry and the various ways people betray themselves and others in an attempt to thrive in it. Pearl, a lesbian trans woman writer, creates a gay cisgender man alter ego, Paul, to sell an “authentic” gay male romance to the straight female masses. Of course, things soon spiral out of control.
Pearl is not necessarily a very likeable character (taking her butch trans girlfriend as inspiration for the masculine partner in the gay novel without acknowledging why being compared to a man might be doubly hard for a butch trans woman? Yikes!), but she is certainly fun and sarcastic and she just doesn’t stop digging once she gets going, all traits I like in my fail-woman characters. She is incredibly interesting and intruiging and I do have a soft spot for messy women, so I had a great time. If you enjoy books where you can see your darkest impulses reflected and enjoy a trainwreck you can see coming a mile away: This absolutely fits the bill!
But Pearl isn’t the only character in this story. There’s also Barbs (the butch trans woman, my favorite side character, just because she is such a quintessential butch with a big heart and bigger hurt) and Pippin (Pearl’s trans roommate, whose picture Pearl uses for her cis-sona. I love him. He finds out she took his picture without asking and only cares that the fictional guy in question is cis. So he passes :)), as well as a variety of people in fandom and publishing.
This story not only examines the cis-gaze in publishing (Pearl is pressured to remove a trans side character from her story in order not to “offend” or “confuse” the audience, *cough* cowards *cough*), but also the way cis people are just always so eager to degender a trans woman at the slightest opportunity (Beatrice is a prime example of that. 10/10 would fight!) and finally the online fujoshi community on twitter and their never-ending quarrels as well as some of the most off-putting straight fujo comments I have ever encountered. Yuck!
If you are in speculative trans lesbian lit circles however you will also get a few lovely nods and hints towards the stories Pearl would actually like to write (“Yuri futures are up!” – and a guy ends up forcefemmed!), which I found a really nice change of pace to the otherwise deeply, tragically messy reality of getting published as a marginalized author presented here.
If you are a trans writer, in online trans writing spaces, ever interacted with fujo-spaces only to find they don't fit, like transfem MCs who make mistakes or just want to read a story that critiques publishing in a very enjoyable to read way: check this book out. 5 stars. I loved it.

TW: Misgendering, prejudice against butch trans women, lots of book discourse, wrong accusations of “bad behavior” (implications of aggression and sexual assault), discussion of suicide (no attempts, but it is considered and discarded)

[May · Rating 5 out of 5]

Satire about marginalized books isn't exactly new, and in many ways A Rotten Girl almost feels inevitable. But Topaz does an excellent job setting this story apart. Pearl is a trans woman who, in an attempt to achieve mainstream success, poses as a cisgender gay man to write a trashy M/M romance targeted at straight women. She's a fairly unlikeable protagonist, willing to go to extreme lengths at the expense of her gay trans roommate Pippin and her girlfriend Barbs, but her motivations are ultimately fairly relatable.

It helps that the writing is consistently a blast: relentlessly quotable, with nearly every single paragraph having at least one standout line. From exerpts from Pearl's novel, to pointed (and fairly) accurate depictions of the horrors of being an online trans woman, Topaz's writing is incredibly sharp, balancing both humor and commentary excellently.

My only major complaint is that some character development, particularly in regards to Pearl's relationship with Barbs, felt a little rushed and contrived. I would have loved to see more justification for Pearl's decision not to be upfront with both Barbs and Pippin, and neither characters' relationship with Pearl felt like it ended on a satisfying note.

A Rotten Girl is an absolute blast to read. But more than that, it's an excellently written piece of satire, that manages to cram quite a bit of layered commentary into a short (but sweet) package. Definitely worth a read, I loved this one quite a bit.

[Elena Abbott · Rating 2 out of 5]

I had to push myself to read through this book, mostly to see how it ended. To be honest i just found the main character to be extremely unlikable. I understand that the book is supposed to be satire, but it's difficult to see the satire with how it's written and the main character is basically an amalgamation of everything that is terrible about the trans experience one often finds on social media, particularly Twitter, which takes a starring role in the book.

The writing itself is excellent, but it made me feel things that were massively uncomfortable through the whole thing, and a lot of what the MC faces while she weaves her web of lies is what quite a few trans people go through especially online. But I feel like the actions of the main character, while apparently written as satire, are hard to take or even understand her motivations in doing what she does. And the ending is cut so short and cleaned up so quickly that it gave me a bit of whiplash that left me wanting at least another full chapter to see how everything she had done actually ended up affecting her.

As Pearl dives down the social media rabbit hole and finds herself lying more and more and more it becomes harder to feel much for her when she's so quick to decide to double down on her lies instead of coming clean or trying to save face, because she feels she needs to.

It's not a terrible book, but it definitely wasn't the right book for me, and I hope others who read it find some saving grace in it, maybe in its humor, its wit, its sarcasm, but the actions of Pearl herself just rubbed me the wrong way.

[Lillam98 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely hilarious (and devastating).

[Clarissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an incredibly well written and perfectly structured book. It takes a highly skilled author to create some truly heartbreaking scenes within a novel that is mainly narrated with comedic lightness as the protagonist's desire to have her book reach a wider audience causes her to make mistake after mistake.

[I. Merey · Rating 5 out of 5]

It’s been a while since a book has hit such a personal punch (and I hated that I got the Ana Mardoll reference :D)

When there is so much competition for readers’ attentions and marginalized writers are constantly juggling the balls of ‘authenticity’ with 'repackage your xperience' and ‘the world doesn’t always want what you want to give’ type of harsh reality checks, stories like this feel like a very natural outpouring. Add in some scathing observations about the trans lesbian-ness, online brainworms and fanfic plus plus style writing and you get this poisonous little gem. [[As an aside, while the more socially-slapstick moments of the story definitely feel satirical--as a person who has spent the last decade in small pub and trans/queer watering holes on/offline------this was also pretttty on the nose.]]]

Pearl is a proud transbian who has published an authentic and poignant first book—and it is a total flop. It seems there isn’t much of a market for literary trans lesbian fic… but there IS a market for M/M “spice,” preferably penned by an echte man. And so begins Pearl’s problematically hilarious (de)transition into Paul, a humble, well-spoken author who knows what fujoshis crave. But as you can imagine, it’s not long before Pearl/Paul begins to trip up in her own web of lies, catching her lovely butch girlfriend Barb and her lovably shallow trans twink roomie Pippin up as well. And some of these moments, particularly the hurt Barb catches in the wake of Pearl's lies, was really heartbreaking and downright painful to read.

ROTTEN tunes into a very specific (and for me personally, very relatable) radio station: of being chronically online, of the tooth-grating compromise with allies who wear you down with their plausible deniability weirdness (but the alternative is people who outright hate you), of trying to navigate purity black/white thinking within marginalized communities WHILE having self and situational awareness WHILE also being a highly flammable, and possibly organically selfish creative person who is never fully 'there' as others seem to be—

Of hurting the people who are on your side, because sometimes, humiliatingly, you still crave the Man’s (literally and figuratively) approval.

This theme of authors’ getting caught up in the tangle of false online avatars for readership has been explored in YELLOWFACE (and probably other?) books as well, but imo ROTTEN's riff teases out a more nuanced and interesting discussion than ‘what if someone exploited a fictional marginalized identity for social/publishing points.’ Not what if I pretended to be someone I wasn't, but what if I pretended to be the person I have been trying NOT to be pressed into pretending to be, my entire life. What if I pretended to be the person everyone who doesn't really know me, WANTS me to be.

[[Sorry, I am REALLY going long on this review, but I have to detour here to say I also really enjoyed the parts regarding being a creative person who lives and interacts with more grounded people, and the friction that creates. While of course not exactly as depicted in this story, I could definitely relate as a writer to some of the tensions the author has with her girlfriend about aspects of her story and her real life being inspiration for them, and I think for a not-insignificant amount of writers, that uncanny overlap between truth and fiction is an uncomfortable, but interesting, valley to have to sometimes look into...]]

Beyond the insecurity Pearl struggles with as a trans woman who hungers for praise, but also wants to be true to herself, ROTTEN also delves into the double-edge of #OwnVoices and the delicate line marginalized authors walk when they have to write something that commodifies and repackages their identity in just the way that is asked for that season and files down any rough edges or ‘’confusing’’ characters who may cause online rows. "Throw the monkeys some bananas!" Pearl's editor urges her at one point.

Well, the author of ROTTEN threw ALL of the bananas for this one and I loved her for it! If you’re in any way involved in indie/tiny press, the modern pub scene of more marginalized authors, or online trans/queer spaces, you should definitely read this. If you are not involved in any of these things, this book's constant allusions to online happenings may be a tad confusing, but it will be a window onto an interesting, chaotic and SAD world. Because it IS sad to watch Pearl torpedo her life and closest connections, all to write something that appeals to people who do not give a shit about her.

So perhaps we come to one of the book's cornerstone critiques, of creators getting lost in the sauce, as they become way more invested in what people are saying about their work, than about having anything of value to even say.

The open end also confirms that the lesson may not be learned and similar mistakes may come down in the future. This may not be the neat character arc some may want; ROTTEN wraps up with plain old fashioned non-magical realism. Topaz leaves us with a catty, cynical, surprisingly poignant, and TRUE story.

[M Zakharuk · Rating 5 out of 5]

You know, trans literary fiction often disappoints me at least a little. It's about the messiness, yes, because illuminating the ugly, mundane, and petty aspects of trans life is appealing and relatable in the best-worst way—but, traditionally published litfic must cater to cis sensibilities, and so the messiness is also such that would appeal, or at least not alienate too much.

This isn't that book. In fact it's possible some aspects of it would be incomprehensible to a cis reader that's never spoken to a trans woman for longer than a minute—or a trans woman writer, specifically.

And it's glorious.

The way transfem writers and fiction are isolated from the broader literature—in every sphere, regardless of genre, regardless of publication method—creates a special kind of underworld rife with ever-recurrent stories no one has ever heard of (no one except trans women, which to the rest of the world may as well be no one.) Here that is written out, beat by beat. The predictable way in which literary insight and brilliance, though promised celebration, just fizzles out, abandoned by publishers and all but transfem readers alike; the way rancid transmisogyny goes completely unchallenged in allegedly progressive circles; the impossibility of actually having a bloody career. Not much to happily sell to a cis audience, or even a non-transfem one, because it would reveal to them something true: it's all their fault. It's obvious in 'A Rotten Girl' too. Pearl, the MC, is hardly on a moral high horse. She's kind of an asshole. Avoidant, self-centred, just a little manipulative in a 'but I didn't mean to' kind of way—she's perfect for the world of publishing, really. But it's also abundantly clear that it doesn't matter how much of a good or bad transfem she is: her circumstances are made for her from the start, and the conclusion is foregone. It's only her personal relationships that her flaws sabotage; her writing career was never going to happen no matter what she did.

This may sound kind of grim—and it is—but 'A Rotten Girl' is also a hilarious book, and often quite lighthearted. The conversational writing style, the irreverent characters, and the ridiculous nonsense of fandom and publishing all create a perfect cocktail of comedy that makes you want to devour the book as much as it dares you to look away. The plot reads like something StrangeAeons would make a video about five years later. Just like in real life, it makes you cry and rage, and your anxiety has never been worse—but it's also so fucking ridiculous, you can't help but laugh.

If you've ever been involved in queer publishing circles, 'A Rotten Girl' brings catharsis. If you haven't, read it anyway. It might just be the funniest real story that never happened and will happen again.

[Rachael · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5/5 (rounded up to 4)

CW: transphobia, misgendering, panic attack (on-page), homophobia, lesbophobia, suicidal thoughts (mentioned), racism (mentioned), ableism (mentioned), gun violence

Closed Door Mod: Chapter 8 (some parts)

While it's quite the same as Yellowface by R.F. Kuang (if that's what you're hoping A Rotten Girl is like while reading this book), but the book itself is not bad.

Sure, there's some weird tangents for a page or two (though my guess is that it's part of Pearl's character trait of overthinking everything) and I don't think that we needed that many excerpts from M&E, but I think Topaz provides an interesting conversation to the table about a marginalized author adopting a pseudonym to make themselves palatable to readers. Pearl's not as much of a likeable character, but I think hearing her explanations about why she feels like she has to adopt the persona cis gay man in order to work to be heard, those reasons are somewhat understandable (even though I don't agree with the lengths Pearl went to in order to protect that persona). I also thought that Topaz does a great job of highlighting internet discourse and how that can drastically change with the slightest action or comment.

That being said, if you want something similar to Yellowface but want commentary on online discourse and transfem rep, you might enjoy A Rotten Girl.

[Eve · Rating 4 out of 5]

Strong 4

Lots of similar vibes to Yellowface, but with the protagonist assuming a less marginalized identity, rather than a more marginalized one. I think this made me feel that her actions were more justifiable, even though she still makes a lot of selfish choices in her relationships with Barbs and Pippin.

Very interesting exploration of identity and publishing, and I really enjoyed the excerpts from her book. The one thing that felt missing to me was that the conflicts with Barbs and Pippin never felt fully addressed.

Looking forward to reading everything else by this author!

[Blaize · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is very funny and relevant if you're familiar with certain chronically online circles. As you can tell from some of the other reviews, it's not an easy read if you struggle with main characters who make morally and/or logically bad decisions constantly. I tend to have a soft spot for "unlikeable" main characters so that doesn't bother me, but I did feel plenty of second-hand anxiety on Pearl's behalf. If you're looking for a book that doesn't shy away from the messy side of queer/trans life, that will make you cringe, laugh out loud and feel your stomach drop with dread, this is it.

[Rachel Childers]

A fun, if extremely online, little metafictional romance novel about writing a romance novel. Probably more fun if you are enmeshed in fujoshi fandom drama, and probably less so if you are an actual fujoshi, many of whom, in my experience, are capable of being normal. But where's the fun in that?

[Talia Bhatt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Review to come!

[Samrat · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love a good screwball comedy, and A Rotten Girl is excellent and heartfelt.

[Cee Sturdy · Rating 4 out of 5]

A cute, funny book. The entire last act had me cringing as the house of cards falls apart.

[pareidolia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I needed this rn. For a multitude of reasons.

It also took me far longer to read these 184 pages than usual because I had to stop and giggle every time I read Casement and Ukebridge.

[Dani Finn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I call this book 2025's answer to Welcome to Dorley Hall, with a caveat.

The protagonist is the messiest, meanest, funniest Problematic Trans Girl you'd ever care to meet. As a fellow online trans, I laughed quite frequently at the little in-jokes and digs that pepper every page. I can see how the humor might not hit for everyone--Pearl is truly a self-centered, mean-spirited person for most of the book. If you're not ready for a somewhat unlikable narrator, this won't be the book for you, but I found myself rooting for her and following her shenanigans, and being (mostly) rewarded for it.

The premise is brilliant: a transfem author whose first book was dead on arrival looks to rejuvenate her career by writing M/M for fujoshi (the Japanese term the book uses, cis women who like M/M). We all know how difficult it is for trans authors, particularly transfeminine ones, in the traditional publishing space, so this was an easy pre-order for me. The execution is almost as brilliant; chaos ensues when Pearl uses someone else's profile pic as her author photo so as not to out herself. The scenes at the romance convention were a hoot, and I read this in just a few sessions. The prose is great, but the humor was what kept me riveted; I laughed out loud repeatedly.

The fake novel-within-a-novel was fantastic, fictionalized bits of the fictional author's life woven into an M/M spy story. A marvelous sendup of the romance genre as a whole, and of the relationship between publishing, author, and reader.

Where it slipped a little for me was in the ending. The resolution felt a bit rushed, both the author plot and the romantic plot. I wanted to see more development of the relationship, and maybe a little stronger character growth on Pearl's part in the wake of all that happened. We hear how she's going to change, but I would have liked more organic introspection and overt discussion with her partner about that.

Still, it's a brilliant book that will stick with me, and you should definitely read it if you want an interesting twist on the plight of trans women in publishing, with the caveat that if you struggle with unlikable narrators, this may not be the book for you. I found it quite enjoyable; we can let trans characters be problematic sometimes, just as a treat.

[oniongrapefruit · Rating 5 out of 5]

Trans woman whose heartfelt literary debut sinks pivots to writing M/M romance... and, in accordance with the commodification of identity demanded by the market, decides to create a cis gay man pseudonym. Super hilarious AND also quite serious, it's a perfect entry in the 'messy queer woman' sub-genre.

Full review: https://transcendentbooks.substack.co...