Abortion: Our Bodies, Their Lies, and the Truths We Use to Win

by Jessica Valenti

A clear and concise guide to the politics of post-Roe America, for readers eager to understand the attacks on our bodies and freedom—and to do something about it

In this, her most urgent book yet, New York Times–bestselling author Jessica Valenti dispels misinformation and cuts through the headline overwhelm to illuminate the full-scale assault conservative lawmakers have launched on women’s freedom—and fundamental human rights. Valenti provides the language to talk about abortion with confidence and the facts to convince.

American voters overwhelmingly support abortion rights and have for decades. In the years since Roe v. Wade was overturned, that support has been growing, as nearly seventy-percent of Americans want abortion to be legal in the first three months of pregnancy, and sixty-three percent want abortion medication to be legal. Abortion is among the key tools conservatives use to roll back decades of advances for women, but here Valenti arms readers with the truth needed to fight back and win, not only at the dinner table but at the polling station and all the way to the Supreme Court.

Genres: Nonfiction, Feminism, Politics, Audiobook, Social Justice, Womens, Health

Audible Audio

First published October 1, 2024

About the author

Award-winning writer and activist Jessica Valenti is the author of seven books, including the New York Times bestseller Sex Object: A Memoir. Her groundbreaking anthology, Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape, paved the way for legislation of the same name, setting what’s now considered the gold standard for sexual consent.

Jessica has also been credited with sparking feminism’s online wave by founding the trailblazing blog Feministing. She’s been a columnist for The Guardian and The Nation, and her writing has been published everywhere from The New York Times and The Atlantic to Bitch magazine and The Toast.

After the demise of Roe, Jessica founded Abortion, Every Day, an urgent synthesis of anything and everything happening with abortion rights in the United States.

She lives in Brooklyn with her husband and daughter.

Reviews

[Emily May · Rating 5 out of 5]

You know when you read a book and you can tell the author has researched their topic so deeply, pored over every case and piece of legislation, that they know it in their bones? That's this book. I have to give it to Valenti-- and she herself admits --she has lived, breathed and obsessed over U.S. abortion rights since their collapse in Dobbs v. Jackson.

I was concerned before reading, but now I confess I'm horrified. Valenti digs into the ramifications of overturning Roe v. Wade in the two years since it happened. A lot of it is awful but unsurprising-- pregnant women being left to the point of sepsis before doctors would dare intervene, women being forced to labour and give birth to fetuses doomed to die shortly after birth, a 10 year old rape victim forced to travel out of state for an abortion --but some of it I did not know about and it is truly insidious.

She shows how conservative lawmakers are already taking steps to revoke access to and stir up fears around contraception, spreading misinformation about the pill* and reframing IUDs and morning-after pills as types of abortion. Attempts have been made, some successfully, to imprison pregnant women within their home state with abortion "trafficking" laws, meaning that civil suits can be brought against a person who in any way assists a pregnant woman in leaving the state for an abortion.

Valenti makes a strong case against the nonsense that "pro-life" has anything to do with supporting life. She argues that these laws are about controlling and punishing women, which may have sounded a bit ridiculous had I not read this book. But the evidence is all there. Why else force a grieving woman to experience the pain of labour and the heartbreak of giving birth to a fetus that would never have survived?

*It is wild the amount of people parroting the claim that the pill makes women choose less masculine men. All those crazy harpies on the pill and their Timothee Chalamet fandom, what is the world coming to? Next they'll be asking for human rights!

No, but really. Serious people are saying this seriously. Even though this was reported in one study of 170 women (Little et al, 2013) and when they expanded the study to a far more impressive 6,482 women (Little, et al 2019), they found "no evidence" for changed preference.

[Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Solid to-the-point overview of abortion two years since the fall of Roe V. Wade. As she’s done in her previous books, Jessica Valenti does a great job of dispelling common conservative, anti-choice talking points about abortion. She highlights how abortion bans harm and exert control over women and all people who give birth, as well as how conservative media/lawmakers/etc. have been trying to change up their language to get around how abortion restrictions really are. She acknowledges intersectionality and references real women’s stories to back up her points.

I don’t think this book will contain too much new information for those who already educate themselves on abortion issues. However, it’s a nice refresher and communicates the urgency of fighting for abortion well.

[Moriah Story · Rating 5 out of 5]

I haven't (yet) read this book, but I am preemptively rating it 5 stars in an attempt to counteract the bogus and misinformed reviews left by other people who also haven't read this book. Bodily autonomy is a right, abortion is not murder, and I look forward to hearing Jessica Valenti's take on this subject.

[Traci Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a really great overview of what is going on with abortion and how to talk about it and combat anti-abortion talking points and policy. She explains how this happens and the language and attitudes that made abortion bans possible as well as the "why" behind it all. It is a short book, but it does feel a little redundant in parts.

[Lindsey Bluher · Rating 5 out of 5]

✨SIX STAR BOOK✨and one of the best books I’ve read this year. And, the best book about abortion I’ve read yet (though I can’t wait to read more from the suggested books in the resources section!)

If you’re pro abortion and/or pro choice, you HAVE to read this. Not only is is full of everything we need to know about today’s fight for abortion access, it’s so incredibly well written and easy to comprehend the truth happening in the US today. I found myself highlighting throughout constantly and appreciated how eloquent yet accessible the writing was.

This is one of those books where no review I write will do it justice. So tldr, read this. Immediately.

[Becky · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is my second Jessica Valenti book, and it did not disappoint. She writes such direct, searing commentary on whatever issue she's tackling, that I seriously think this woman has single-handedly reshaped my brain on these topics.

I admit to being hesitant about reading this book because of the title. Despite being a feminist, despite being pro-choice, despite my ardent conviction that abortion is healthcare and necessary, despite it all. I found myself wanting a less divisive title.

Oh my sweet, sweet summer child self of less than a week ago.

There is nothing else that this book could or should be called. This book is titled exactly as it should be.

Well, maybe "The Right Wants to Own And Control You, But If They Can't, They'll Settle For Killing You Instead."

That's what it boils down to. It's not hyperbole. It's not hysteria. It's not rhetoric. It's reality. Abortion just happens to be the issue they have selected to accomplish that. They know that pregnancy is dangerous. They know that there are complications that can arise. They know that fatal fetal abnormalities occur. They know that pregnancy can exacerbate the situation for women in unstable or dangerous living conditions - whether that's domestic violence, or drug or alcohol dependence, homelessness, mental health issues.

They know that maternal AND infant mortality rates spike when abortion is illegal. They know that it is traumatic for women and pregnant people to be forced, against their will, to carry a dead or dying fetus, simply because the procedure to remove it is abortion, and they don't want that to be allowed. They know that it is cruel and inhumane - inhuman, really - to force someone to carry a nonviable pregnancy to term, only to then have to watch their baby die, often painfully, in their arms.

They'll tell you that pro-choice and pro-abortion advocates want "babies" killed up until birth, but really it's the religious right Republican agenda that kills babies. And mothers. And leaves children without mothers, and leaves spouses bereaved, and leaves society in shambles.

They know all of this. They just don't care. They lie, manipulate, shame, demonize, and criminalize healthcare, all for control.

Don't think they'll stop at abortion. They are already sowing the seeds of outlawing and banning contraceptives. They are already calling IUDs and morning after pills "abortifacients" and claiming that they cause an abortion because life begins at fertilization.

They are reframing the debate to make what they are doing - removing healthcare access from women - seem moral, righteous, protective.

Look at the laws. Look at the "exceptions", and what is required to actually use them. Look at the hoops one must jump through, the invasive ultrasounds, the waiting periods, the police reports, the medical records - they write these "exceptions" with the full knowledge that they are so onerous that it's impossible to actually use them. Look at the stats. Look at the cases of CHILDREN being denied abortion after rape or incest. Look at the clinics and the maternity wards closing all over the country - the OBGYN deserts where doctors are scared to practice for fear of being imprisoned for providing care. Healthcare that some man with no medical training or experience has deemed is against the law.

If men were able to get pregnant, abortion would be available over the counter, no prescription required. No lines, no waiting. No questions.

Men's bodies are not legislated.

It's not a matter of abortion being "murder", it's a matter of abortion giving women options. And men in power do not want women to have options. They want us subjugated, second-class, meek, and obedient.

Or dead.

[Trin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is sharp, clear-eyed, unbelievably depressing, necessary. Valenti has obviously made this her issue; she's done her research into every aspect of this topic -- every bill currently on the docket, every legal case, every strategy by the extremist anti-abortion right. She explains all of this in crystal clear detail, backed meticulously by evidence. More importantly, she illuminates what these extremists plan to do next -- come for birth control, no fault divorce, every other aspect of bodily autonomy -- and what we can do to combat these plans. I especially appreciate the way she dispels a variety of abortion and birth control myths, and offers advice on ways to talk about these issues that refuse to cede ground and instead acknowledge a key fact: abortion and birth control are actually wildly popular in this country. No one wants what the far-right is selling.

[Lindsay · Rating 5 out of 5]

I hate it here.

[Sage · Rating 5 out of 5]

An absolute masterclass from the incomparable Jessica Valenti. I don’t know how she does the work that she does without constantly raging and/or breaking down and/or never being able to get out of bed.

This book is equal parts infuriating and enlightening, and really cuts to the quick of what the anti-abortion movement (aided and abetted by the Republican Party) has been working toward for the last 50 years, as well as their objectives in 2024 and beyond. They are attempting to gaslight the American public into believing abortion is a polarizing and divisive issue when in reality the majority of Americans think the matter should be between a pregnant person and their chosen medical provider. They are saying “hey look there’s exceptions to our BANS” (they don’t love this word, but yknow, a spade is a spade etc) when in reality, the exceptions are so layered in bullshit language that they become inaccessible to those seeking care.

Valenti takes a deep dive into the fight for bodily autonomy in a (cursed) timeline that is seeing more and more bans passed under the guise of “protecting women” and other nonsense. I remain heartened by the fact that most times abortion has been on the ballot, voters have overwhelmingly voted to protect access to abortion. May that continue, see ya in Roevember etc.

Anti-abortion activists are not going to stop at abortion—conservatives have begun targeting birth control, doubling down on spreading scientific misinformation, planning to infect the educational system with junk science as they seek to indoctrinate children (because they know voters under 30 overwhelmingly support reproductive rights.)

This book, and the arguments laid out in the birth control chapter in particular, was terrifying and enraging (and deeply compelling.)


**** Highlights: (reading a DRC and don’t have page number but I’ve noted the chapter numbers)

- DIDNT EVEN CONSIDER THIS but was SHOOK when Valenti wrote “and that leads to the final, most insidious reason the anti-abortion movement opposes abortion medication. The pills robbed them of their favorite pastime: harassing women at clinics. Women’s ability to end a pregnancy at home with just a few pills—safely, privately, at home, without shame—was too much for them to take.” SHOTS!!!! FIRED!!!! (Chapter 1)

- “The real question is, if Republicans believe that America is a “pro-life” country, then why are they working so hard to keep voters from having a choice?” MHMMMMMM!!! (Chapter 2)

- the fact that MILLIONS of women now live in a “double desert” (no abortion care OR maternity care) because of increasingly draconian laws meaning there are fewer OB-GYNs available and/or doctors don’t want to work in a state where they could potentially be thrown into jail for providing a standard of care to their patients. DOUBLE DESERT!!!!!!! Infuriating and so fucking sad.

- brief discussion of trad wives and the Venn diagram overlap of trad wives + advocating against birth control. “What better way to quiet the next generation of girls, growing up in a country without reproductive rights, than to tell them it’s actually progress? That not having access to birth control would be good, actually? They’re making sexism aspirational.” (Chapter 4)

- the shift from straight up anti-abortion talking points to PARENTAL RIGHTS (Blech) because they KNOW Republicans are getting an ass kicking at the polls, so now let’s focus on pArEnTaL rIgHtS 🙃🙃🙃 k.

Also these two quotes from chapter 9 metaphorically kicked my teeth in:

“They were never going to stop at our bodies, and this never was just about abortion. Once you understand that abortion bans are just one tool in a much broader campaign to put women back in their place-and to strengthen white male control over everyone else-all the other, related Republican attacks make much more sense.”

“I don't know what's worse: dying in the darkness of a back alley, or in full view under fluorescent lights.
They're both tragic, but there's something particularly cruel about the idea of dying while surrounded by those with the ability to save you.”

[Katie Foley · Rating 4 out of 5]

wish i had a photographic memory so i could recite this word for word at thanksgiving

[Luke Kono · Rating 4 out of 5]

✒︎4 stars

Following the end of Roe and Dobbs in 2022, journalist Jessica Valenti began writing a substack called Abortion: Every Day which quickly took off in popularity. Abortion, the book, is a short culmination of all of the misinformation and horrors that have spread across the country since then.

Abortion is well-researched, practical, and concise, which is really all it needs to be. Valenti set out to write a book that is easy to understand and could also be used as a guide, with pro-abortion talking points and arguments, and she definitely succeeded. The book is only about 170 pages of actual content, yet within it she covers the cruelty of anti-abortion laws, common misinformation spread about abortion, and the truth about abortion in the U.S.

I think for anyone who is already knowledgeable about abortion and abortion politics, Valenti may not say anything new to you, but that does not negate the importance of this book, nor its contents. If you're looking to learn more, Abortion is also an excellent jumping off point as its succinct and informative enough without including too much fluff like some non-fiction books fall victim to.

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[Jenna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've pre-ordered the book and look forward to reading it. I read Jessica Valenti's newsletter, Abortion Every Day, every day. She is the subject matter expert on the current abortion landscape, the truths of abortion bans, and the many secondary harms that result from them. Thank you for doing this work, Ms. Valenti.

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

A necessary book for our times. An important book. A book I learned a lot from. We have to stop the war on women’s bodies. Abortion is health care. Full stop.

[Sofia · Rating 3 out of 5]

A solid book, but I don't think I learned much from it. It's a pretty easy and fast read and goes over a lot of the misinformation regarding abortion and abortion rights. I found that the chapter on birth control and the chapter on teens were the ones that I liked best. The author also sprinkles in a lot of personal anecdotes which I really enjoyed. However, it just didn't have that "wow, I'm learning so much" or the "this is changing my world view" factor that would make me rate it higher.

[Ranjani Sheshadri · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short, informative, and forceful. This is a necessary primer about the disinformation and complete apathy with which Republicans have stripped away people's* access to necessary healthcare under the guise of "protecting life." * I am so so glad that Valenti chose to mention that any person with a uterus, whether or not they identify as a woman, can get pregnant. It's incredibly important that we treat all people on the actual medical reality of their lives, instead of grouping them into binary categories that don't match their anatomy or the incredible variation that sex and gender can produce. But part and parcel of the Republican method of destroying access to care is their insistence on "simplifying" pregnancy, childbirth, and motherhood down to this false, granular level so they can pretend they are creating sound policies, instead of death, misery, and inequality.

Here are some of Valenti's primary points. I could go on and on, and it honestly seems like I did in hindsight, but this is so important to examine:

1) Ever since Roe was first put into effect, conservatives have been working to unravel it. Their campaign of disinformation has had fifty years to be put into effect, which led directly to Dobbs, and the immediate roll-out of bans throughout conservative states. They were ready. We weren't..

2) The United States is not "evenly split" on abortion. More people than ever are pro-choice, especially when they hear stories about how preventing people from accessing safe, local abortions has led to horrific consequences. However, conservatives consistently spin the lie that abortion is unpopular, that "people can agree that "late-term abortions" (more on this later) are controversial and undesirable," and that the nation needs to come to a federal "consensus" about when a person can access an abortion.

3) Republicans consistently define a "late-term abortion" as one that takes place after 12-15 weeks. Friends, that is the end of the first trimester. That is NOT LATE-TERM. This excludes so many people who, as Valenti notes, may not know they are pregnant, may not be able to access abortion care immediately after finding out they are pregnant (if they even know), or may struggle to leave a potentially dangerous situation to do so. There are SO MANY FACTORS that affect whether women are able to access an abortion that prevent them from seeking one immediately, including the fact that Republicans have placed so many restrictions and penalties on abortion providers that abortion clinics have been shuttering around the nation, meaning it is increasingly likely that a person in a red state may have to travel out of state (and secure the money and means to do so) in order to get an abortion. This is by design. Especially culpable here are politicians like Nikki Haley who shows absolutely no regard for the suffering of women in parroting lies like this.

4) Republicans claim they have created common-sense restrictions that will protect women, and claim also that most "bans" are not bans because they provide exceptions for incest, rape, and the health of the mother. This is bullshit. First, any restriction that prevents a large swathe of people from accessing a particular service is effectively a ban. You cannot say, "You cannot use the highway on weekdays, and can only use it during the hours of 9 AM and 12 PM on Saturday if you have a toll tag," and then say "You are not banned from using the highway." If I cannot use the highway in most circumstances, and I am actively hindered from using it, I am banned from using it except in the most paltry circumstances. Additionally, Republican states frequently require women who are seeking an abortion due to incest and rape to also report their rape to the police, or threaten that their abortion provider may have to do this as part of their abortion procedure. This is dangerous and cruel. Women already do not report their rapes or do not press charges because of a variety of factors including the fact that women very rarely are able to secure actual convictions, and that is following a difficult and awful trial. And in many cases, the people who rape them barely face consequences. We also know that women can easily face retaliation if their accusation goes public, which could be extremely dangerous for them. This is a terrible policy, BY DESIGN.

5) The latter part of this, the "exception for the life of the mother," is often interpreted as intervening only when the mother is near-death. If a mother reports symptoms of pre-eclampsia or other conditions early in her pregnancy, or other conditions that are hazardous to her life, doctors cannot intervene until she is near death, at which point it may be too late to save her life. Valenti recounts numerous cases of extreme blood loss, strokes, breathing difficulties, and other dangerous symptoms that were not granted exceptions because the mother was not "near death" enough for doctors to legally intervene. Now, remember, this and all other policies are created by primarily MALE politicians who know nothing about biology or human anatomy, and likely wouldn't change their policies even if they did, because the life of the woman does not matter to them more than their joy in denying women (and all people with uteri) life-saving care. Doctors who know that they are not able to provide people with a basic standard of care are leaving red states en masse, which will only worsen this the fate of women in the long run. I don't blame them. I can't imagine how hard it must be.

6) Republican disinformation is rooted in language. At many points in this book, I saw echoes of George Orwell's Politics and the English Language, because of how euphemized so many "new" terms have entered the Republican abortion lexicon. First, "abortion" is defined as any procedure or intervention that prevents the implantation of the fetus, up to and including birth control, which is another area Republicans are attempting to attack across the United States (specifically IUDs and pills, which Republicans say "cause abortions." They don't.). This is because so many Republicans have now moved the goalposts of personhood back to the blastocyst instead of the fetus, meaning that in many states, women who have suffered miscarriages have been accused and arrested for "murdering their fetuses," despite Republicans promising that they would never hold women criminally liable for anything that resulted in the death of their fetus. Bullshit. Valenti tells us of a woman who was SHOT IN THE STOMACH and then was charged with the death of her fetus, as if she wanted to have that happen. This is the inanity and cruelty and horror of Republican logic.

7) Let's talk about "partial-birth abortion." It's not a thing. But this term has entered the lexicon and it's so very hard to eradicate it. Valenti underscores the importance of medical providers and politicians working to clarify the insanity of this language frequently and furiously because until this myth is shut down, abortion will continue to be demonized. The same is true of "abortion at birth." WHAT IN THE ACTUAL HELL. A baby that is not born alive is still-born, not aborted.

8) Abortion is safer than childbirth. It's no wonder that as abortion bans have also produced increases in infant and maternal mortality deaths. This is the "pro-life" campaign at work. This is by design. Republicans would rather a woman undergo a C-section, at great risk to her life and livelihood, to deliver an unviable pregnancy purely so the woman "has a chance to see her baby" than allow her to seek an abortion early in her pregnancy due to a potential genetic abnormality. Republicans also spread lies about birth control, suggesting that taking or using it reduces a woman's chance of fertility and puts her at greater risk of health consequences. You know what is also extremely dangerous and resulted in the deaths of millions of women throughout human history? PREGNANCY AND CHILDBIRTH. Part of what has made it safer, along with sanitation, has been a woman's ability to decide for herself with sound medical advice whether she can undergo a pregnancy. Valenti recounts at least one story of a woman who was diagnosed with cancer during her pregnancy, and was forced to delay chemotherapy until her baby was born because the fetus was more important to Republicans than the woman was to her family and to her existing children.

9) One of the primary weapons in the Republican arsenal, in addition to language, has been guilt. In the wake of the closure of abortion clinics, anti-choice (ain't nothing pro-life about them) organizations have set up numerous "crisis pregnancy centers" and "maternity homes" to cater to women who want pregnancy counseling. Staffed by seemingly trained professional in lab coats, these organizations deter women from taking birth control, persuade them to carry their babies to term, even in cases of severe birth defects like ancephaly (in which women were told to give birth and bond with their baby for as little time as they had left—leaving out the horror of having to do this to a baby with NO DEVELOPED HEAD, and then, of course, provide NOTHING in the way of future support for mother and baby besides "well-wishes" and "prayers." Because why would Republicans invest any money in social services to actually back up their claims of being "pro-life" when they care about neither the mother nor the baby in the long-run?

10) I could go on and on, because I am clearly furious, but the left has to start working NOW. They have to strengthen grassroots organizations, correct misinformation IMMEDIATELY AND PASSIONATELY, and not shy away from discussing abortion fully and openly. The number of anti-choice groups that hold sway and market themselves anywhere from on the public state to high school and college campuses is staggering. Again, they have had fifty years to do this. But we have to fight back. Abortion is necessary. Abortion changes lives for the better. Abortion allows women to be more than vessels. Abortion lets women choose their existing children, their existing health, their careers, their visions, their dreams, for themselves. Banning abortion kills women and people with uteri, full stop. There is no such thing as a "pro-life" organization. There are only organizations for whom the potential death of the mother is seen as a blessing, and that truth needs to be told.

[Joan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have now read this book and wiped my previous review of five stars, stating I was doing so back then to counter the fake 1 star reviews from before the book was actually published. Having now read this, I stand by my prior guess of five stars. This is superb! It is not pleasant reading. But it is essential reading! Women need to understand Republicans want to make women second class citizens, with no rights to control their bodies! Their goal is to remove women from having any say in what happens to their bodies. The next step is to attack birth control as being “abortifacients”. Valenti backs up each and every statement she makes with case information and endnoted in the back. Valenti makes it clear up front she resents writing this book and she resents the fact that her newsletter is quite busy enough to justify daily release. She really wishes it wasn’t so but the Republican misinformation and attacks on women are frequent enough she sometimes has put out a second update in a day if the news is important enough. If you are unwilling to read the whole book, at least read the introduction and Chapter 10. Note that this is a relatively short book and you really should read the whole book! By the end you will be in no doubt that this is both an attack on women and an attack on democracy. Highly, emphatically recommended!

I am infuriated that my daughters in law and granddaughter have fewer rights than I did during my potential childbearing life! Please read this, if you care for the women in your life!

[alicia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely a necessary read. Love seeing the anger and passion from the author because this is a hot topic that should not even be a contested topic at all. It was super informative but easy to understand. There were a lot of great stats and it delved deeper to show how they get misconstrued by the media or antis. I've seen this a lot lately in my nonfiction era: this book also deals with how terminology is easily manipulated or can mean different things when used in certain arguments. When it boils down, this should be a public health topic and not political at all.

[emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a heartbreaking read following the election outcome. The tangible damage (primarily the preventable passings of many women) since the overturning of Roe make the upcoming Trump administration terrifying. This book is full of important testimonials and threatening legislations, and fully justifies the point that abortion is simply critical healthcare.
To sum it up: “Pregnancy is too complicated to be legislated.”

[Layne Burley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was very good & informative. I’m just convinced people (other women sometimes) hate women and don’t see us as human. As Valenti put it, “is the patriarchal pat on the head worth it?”

I also couldn’t help getting mad and appalled at the disinformation being spread & real damage being done to people who can get pregnant.

[Mack]

Required reading.

“Abortion is good, actually.”

[Ann · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the most frightening books I’ve read in awhile and should be required reading. I thought I had a pretty good handle on the lies and misinformation spread by anti-abortion zealots in their efforts to control women. Turns out that the stuff I knew about was just the tip of the iceberg. To keep up with what’s really happening, I highly recommend this author’s newsletter Abortion, Every Day.

[Laura Ge · Rating 4 out of 5]

reading this after It got re-elected is making me crash out all over again.

moving to canada has never sounded so appealing

[Isabella · Rating 5 out of 5]

this is an amazing and insightful read that I recommend any women pick up. It opens your eyes to even more than you think you knew about abortions and the regulations on them that continue to happen around us. being a women is so hard and scary right now, and its important to educate and advocate for our bodies. i found myself getting mad and feeling empathy for the women discussed. Powerful read

[Chelsea 🏳️‍🌈 · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very heavy reading, especially after the 2024 election. Especially when, as I'm writing this, a dead woman in GA is being used as an incubator for a fetus with severe complications after being denied life saving treatment. A woman with a living, breathing child visiting her in the hospital that can't properly grieve her.

This is extremely informative. While there weren't as many personal stories from those suffering the consequences in the post Roe environment, there were a few references to some that I'd never heard. As a Black woman living in TX, the horror of the consequences of these bans and the increased risk of complications for Black women has never left me. Every time I see a story of some new tragedy, I just think about how much worse it's going to get. In truth, in a state that has very serious limitations on any potential discussion of birth control, the teen pregnancy rate was something they used to be upset about. It's insane to me they're basically encouraging it at this point.

At the heart of this incredibly infuriating summation of the state of the extreme lack of access to family planning, birth control, and autonomy for those in need of reproductive rights, the overwhelming theme is cruelty. In efforts to punish those they feel should've prevented their pregnancies (while simultaneously leading a war on birth control), they're killing people. They're creating orphans and widowers. They're treating us like incubators.

I believe the intent of the conclusion was to confirm the necessity of joining/continuing the fight for access to abortion for everyone. I truly wish I got that spirit, but I still feel extremely hopeless. As long as these heartless monsters are in power, more of us will continue to die.

My heart breaks for Adriana Smith's family.

[Caroline Geer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Appropriately angry and outlines how anti-abortion activists undermine democracy, science, and health. Forceful and necessary. Implicates traditional journalism values (my favorite thing to do as a journalism grad student), the cowardliness of the Democratic Party, the influencers being paid to spread misinformation about birth control, and the extremist carceral think tanks, politicians, healthcare workers, and lawyers that put us all in danger. Why isn’t everyone talking about this book 24/7?!?!

[Erin Young · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tw: abortion, rape, mentions of suicide

I followed Jessica Valenti for a while on tik tok and then on Substack for her reporting on new policies about abortion. I really appreciate her information and trying to get news out there. This book is a more in depth look of a lot of her videos and articles. It is terrifying and hard to take, but also unflinching.

She has done an amazing job with the research and highlights the way words, laws, and bad faith arguments can be played up about abortion. I highly recommend reading if you are in a place mentally to take it because the whole book is powerful but also bleak as hell.

Here are a few of the quotes that really stuck with me:


If your pharmacist has the ability to refuse contraception, it is irrelevant whether it is legal or not. If your insurance coverage can deny you coverage for an iud, who cares what the law says. You can’t afford it anyway. Legality is theoretical. It’s access that determines whether someone can actually get the care they need.

The very idea of exceptions is built on the idea that some women deserve exceptions while others don’t. Those who have sex willing are bad girls who should be punished. Those who are forced or who are sick get a reprieve.

Every abortion denied is a tragedy. You don’t have to go into sepsis to be forever harmed by an abortion ban. You don’t need to be raped to have your body stolen from you.

Most people seek out abortions simply because they don’t want to be pregnant. And that’s okay. In fact it’s critical. Reproductive rights and justice isn’t about who deserves care or who has endured enough suffering to earn an abortion. Forcing anyone to be pregnant against their will is immoral and cruel.

Accurate information about pregnancy directly correlates to support for abortion. The more someone knows about pregnancy the more likely they are to be pro choice. That means anti-abortion activists have a vested interest in keeping students ignorant to the reality of pregnancy and fetal development.

In 2023 the cdc reported that progress in women’s health is on a serious backslide. Women in their 20s-30s are more at risk of suicide, dying in child birth and being killed than those of previous generations. Do we really expect this to get better if women are forced to carry pregnancies that they don’t want and that put their health and lives at risk.

Doctors around the country have described women sobbing and threatening to kill themselves after being refused care. This is what happens to real people in the real world when you legally mandate pregnancy.

Around the time the 4th Texas county made it illegal for someone to leave the state for an abortion, I began to truly despair. What did me in was the absolute mundanity with which the press reported that news. It was just another article in just another paper. As if women being prevented to leave from their state was just another story.

It’s took less than two years from the end of roe for them to publicly be trapping women in states where they aren’t seen as human beings. Can you imagine the outcry if there was a law that restricted men from leaving the state? What horror I wonder will America think is ordinary two years from today.

A death like hers will never be attributed to an abortion ban, but what else do you call something that could’ve been prevented by adequate access to care.

As maternal deserts increase exponentially across the country, a predictable consequence of abortion bans, these are the kinds of deaths we are going to see more and more of. And though they will never be counted as abortion ban deaths, that is what they are.

[laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

absolutely essential reading, especially given the US’s current political climate.

it’s incredibly infuriating to live in a country where the media and government refuse to fight for women’s bodily autonomy. we’ve been conditioned to see the atrocities and blatant inaccuracies spewed from ignorant and hateful politicians as just another talking point and not for what it actually is: cruel, unusual, and dangerously misinformed. every single woman and person who can carry a child should be able to dictate whether they want to move forward with their pregnancy. no ifs, ands, or buts. any rhetoric in opposition including “exception” language is a threat to bodily autonomy and to the pregnant person’s existence. we deserve the right to choose, and it’s people like Jessica Valenti who are leading the charge.

i can only hope that opposition to the egregious legislation being pushed by Republicans will continue to increase.

[Book Mitch · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. I didn't know what I didn't know. Please read.

[Mónîcā · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is TERRIFYING. The sections about language were extremely eye opening. I will have to read this again to be honest.

[Thressa Gustafson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Between the individual stories shared in this book, and Valenti’s depictions of the broader implications to women’s rights beyond “abortion”, this book will stick with me for a long time.