With those few words, my entire world crumbled into a million pieces, never to be whole again.
The spotlight fades away, and I am plunged into a reality I had never imagined, returning to a city that holds memories I thought I had left behind.
And then there’s him…
There’s a darkness behind his stormy eyes that mirrors the soul-deep ache within me. His silent kindness and the intensity of his gaze draw me in, making it impossible to stay away.
How can the one person who brings my heart back to life with each touch, also be the one who plans to leave at the end of the season?
ROOK
One more year.
One more team and then I can be back where she needs me the most.
Train hard. Play harder. Keep my head down and make myself the best defenseman the Chicago Hellhounds have ever seen. I have a plan and I just need to see it through.
And then there’s her…
The breathtaking, silver-haired siren I can't seem to get out of my head.
I try to ignore her, but when I see her struggling, I can't help but step in.
One season is all I have to give, but I have a feeling that with Othelia James, one season won’t be nearly enough.
How do you move on when you never got to say goodbye? How are you supposed to pick up the pieces when your life will never be the same?
This book absolutely broke me, and then put me back together! This was such an emotional roller coaster and had me feeling all the things I hope for while reading.
This book follows Othelia a rockstar who is taking the world by storm. However, she lacks confidence thanks to her horrible mother, and pos boyfriend always putting her down. She doesn’t even realize how much of a narcissist, gaslighting , cheating piece of crap he is until she walks in on him and his assistant after returning from her tour.
Rook is taking the hockey scene by storm, recently being signed with the Chicago Hellhounds, which just so happens to be the same team Othelia’s brother plays for.
After catching her cheating boyfriend in the act, Othelia finds herself running straight to Chicago to her brothers, as well as her Sil and best friend Sloane to prepare for her new nieces arrival in a few short weeks. Heartbroken, Sloane is just the person she needs by her side. After spending time with Sloane and her brother Rian, and at Sloane’s little nudge she finds herself with a little crush on Chicagos newest defenseman Rook, who just so happens to be obsessed with her…and then tragedy strikes, and the person Othelia loves the most is taken from her leaving her world in pieces, in more way than one. When I tell you this book broke me, I absolutely ugly cried.
Trying to put the pieces back together, for not only herself but for the 2 people she holds dearest in the world, she’s put her career on hold, and found herself in Chicago for the foreseeable future.
Rook has demons in his own past, he’s closed off, and just angry. Between hockey, and a disabled mother he finds his life torn between two places. His only goal, getting signed with Seattle, after the end of his one year contract with Chicago, to be close to his mother, because he owes her everything. Until Tilly comes crashing into his life and he’s not sure what is more important anymore. The tension between Rook and Tilly is fantastic, so much push and pull, with the most delicious slow burn, filled with angst and them both fighting their own demons from their past.
Tilly may find herself in a dangerous position getting involved with Rook, only the real villain may have been so much closer to Tilly than she ever imagined! Will Rook be quick enough to save her from the demons of his past as well as her own…
This book had the best plot twist, fantastic mystery elements, an MMC that is swoon worthy, as well as a relatable FMC who I absolutely loved. This steamy sports romance had me up half of the night because I could not put it down!
The only reason I didn’t give this a solid 5 stars is because the ending felt a tad rushed, while fantastic and with an amazing hea, I was curious what happened to a certain body guard, as well as a look at Othelias current relationship with her atrocious mother. So really I just didn’t want the book to end.
Thank you so much to MK Vindictiv for allowing me to read yet another fantastic book of yours in exchange for my honest review! She is absolutely an auto buy author for me now.
Very grateful to be given the opportunity by MK Vindictiv to read If I Would Have Known as an ARC.
This was a bit of a slow burn, but when it got there, it REALLY got there!! A combination of a rockstar romance and a hockey romance, this story gave so much. The tasteful and sensitive handling of difficult subject matter should also be noted.
Absolutely loved this book, it was one of my favourite reads of 2024. I would definitely recommend this, I'm sure you'll love Tilly & Rook!!
This book will forever have a special place on my shelf and in my heart. Seeing this author blossom has just been the most amazing experience and I cannot wait to see where she blooms next.
Thanks to MK Vindictiv for gifting me an ARC of “If I Would Have Known” for review.
If you’re a fan of hockey romances but are looking for something that goes deeper and darker than the usual tropes, be sure to add “If I Would Have Known” to the top of your tbr!
While it absolutely delivers on chemistry and spice, IIWHK also explores grief, trauma and love in a way that feels both raw and honest. It’s a high-stakes read and I found it impossible to put down. Although I read it in a day, I know that this gripping, heartfelt story is going to live rent-free in my head for years!.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Have your tissues ready for this one! Lucky - the HEA definitely makes up for it.
- Romance - Rockstar MFC - Professional Hockey Player MMC - Emotional - “meant to be” - Love after heartbreak
Othelia is travelling the world touring with her band. Being a singer of a famous band, it brings her attention she does and doesn't want. After finding out her long term boyfriend has been sleeping with his secretary, she decides to fly back home to Chicago to be there for her brother & his wife as they are expecting their first child before continuing with her next leg of the tour. This is how she meets Rook - Defenseman hockey player. And suddenly, her new crush. But with her job calling her back on the road, she finds herself saying goodbye before anything has actually started.
Then the unthinkable happens. It is the phone call no sister wants to receive from her brother. And when her brother goes through a tragedy, her rockstar tour life gets put to the side while she is there for him - causing her to be in the closed proximity to Rook once again. But with Rook battling his own emotional demons, she finds herself having to pull him closer while he constantly pushes her away. Until one fateful night when Rook does the old "fxck it". They commence a "fling" that everyone around them can see is much more than a "fling". Especially when both are badly needing a person to lean on while they both battle emotional traumas they shouldn't have to face.
4.5/5 stars with 3/5 steam.
Ps. This book totally gave me Taylor Swift & Travis Kelce vibes!
“I want a home, Tilly, and I only feel home when I'm with you.”
I will start by saying that I was given an ARC copy in exchange for an honest review. These opinions are my own. Thank you so much to M.K for sending a copy my way!
It has been a while since a romance book emotionally wrecked me like If I Would Have Known has. This book tore out my heart and left me trying to read through my tears before healing it with one of the most romantic endings. I adore that we have a rockstar heroine and a hockey hero.
Othelia “Tilly” James is living her wildest dreams. She’s the front woman to one of the world’s top metal bands. She has the life that everyone wants. And it is perfect. Unless you look closer, then everything starts to crumble. One tragedy in the form of a phone call shatters Tilly’s world—she’s lost one of the most important people in her life. She abandons the tour to be with her family. She struggles to help support them while also dealing with her grief. Tilly might find comfort in Rook—the new transfer to Rian’s hockey team—but only if he can finally stop running from his own demons.
The depiction of grief here is raw and honest. I couldn’t help but grieve alongside Tilly and Rook. It has a way of creeping up on you and stealing your breath. Tilly’s has left behind her rockstar lifestyle to be with her family. Rook is slowly healing from childhood trauma. His father was abusive. Rook has pushed everyone away. His only focus is on protecting his mother. It was a joy to see these two open up to each other and be the safe space so the other could heal
This is a serious slow burn. I was here for every second. Tilly and Rook are two broken people just trying to survive in any way they can. They don’t always get it right and can quickly pull back when things get serious, but they communicate. And it’s beautiful. I can 100% see these two being together forever.
These characters have wormed their way into my heart. If you love a romance that packs an emotional punch, I highly recommend picking this one up.
I could not have ended the year with a better book. Late review because I needed time to recover and find the right words for this book.
I laughed. I cried. I mentally kicked and screamed. Rook and Tilly's story is so beautifully told and had me hooked from the first "F*ck it" until the very last page.
** Read with caution, some spoilers **
There were so many things I loved about these two, between the chemistry and the banter. But one of most incredible things I found throughout this book, was the consistent checking of and waiting for clear consent. Something I've not come across and I love to see it!
The growth from each of these characters, going from self - doubt to knowing their worth. Both individually and with each other's support.
This book absolutely ate in my opinion and I'm so glad to have ended the year on such a highlight story.
Last book for 2024 and I couldn’t have picked a better one to see out the year.
If you like emotional, heart breaking love stories this one is for you. I couldn’t put this down and binged the majority of it today.
I cried and laughed and just felt all the feels. A story of grief and love was just what I needed.
Othelia is a badass, somewhat insecure, curvy rockstar and Rook is tattooed, possessive NHL defenseman. Both bringing their share of trauma to the table.
I don’t want to give too much away and spoil it with my review but I highly recommend you read this…. but don’t blame me for the emotional damage this book will inflict! (Maybe just check the trigger warnings so you don’t hate me later)
If I Would Have Known is going to haunt me in the most beautiful way for much time to come, I can feel it.
If you love a book with the whole gamut - a veritable roller coaster - of feelings, IIWHK is the book to put to the top of your TBR. Spice? Check. Ooey gooey love? Check. Heartbreaking grief and trauma? Check. Moments you giggle out loud to? Check. Hot hockey men? Uh, check!
I absolutely enjoyed this story from beginning to end. The bonds between the characters, the storyline, and even the most hateful characters are so real you feel as though you are in the book with them.
I can’t wait to read the remaining stories in this series. Kudos to the author for her taking a real life moment and spinning such a wonderful tale around it.
This book was absolutely beautiful and so well written. I loved it so much. I cried, laughed, and swooned. I loved Rook, but man, did I love Tlly. I need more of this writing. I need them to be feral like Rook for Tilly.
This was a very emotional page turner.😢 seems like more bad than good throughout the book but ended with an HEA. Multiple storylines going on but not hard to follow. Very excited about this author and her work!
From start to finish this book has all the feels. There's soul crushing lows to heart pounding highs and plenty of spice along the way. Each character draws you into their world more and more with each chapter. I can't wait for the next instalment of the What If series
this romance book wasn’t like any other. this one drove a lot deeper. rockstar FMC and hockey defensemen MMC. They each have their own trauma. each of them being very straight forward with their feelings and depending on each other to get through their separate traumas. their love was magical and the spice was hottttt.
There are little words to describe how this book made me feel and the emotion that poured out of it! The main characters had incredible depth that gets explored, and it doesn't stop there. The other characters had such an impact on the story that I was entrapped by them as well! This will go down as one of my favourite reads and a must re read later down the track! The mix of Hockey and Rockstar was not something on my bingo card but boy am I now obsessed with the combo! This book will definitely leave you sobbing, I would have tissues in stand by or some comfort chocolate to support you as you definitely feel connected to each characters emotions. Very excited to read more and even more excited to have a copy of my own shortly!
There are little words to describe how this book made me feel and the emotion that poured out of it! The main characters had incredible depth that gets explored, and it doesn't stop there. The other characters had such an impact on the story that I was entrapped by them as well! This will go down as one of my favourite reads and a must re read later down the track! The mix of Hockey and Rockstar was not something on my bingo card but boy am I now obsessed with the combo! This book will definitely leave you sobbing, I would have tissues in stand by or some comfort chocolate to support you as you definitely feel connected to each characters emotions. Very excited to read more and even more excited to have a copy of my own shortly!
This book was so refreshing, to have a hockey/rockstar collaboration that flowed effortlessly was honestly a godsend, alot of highly marketed hockey romances have all felt very cliche but this was such an amazing read with an authentically unique storyline.
This is a bit of a slow burn initially but plenty of spice ensues that is written so well it will make you need multiple cold showers (and in my case want to identify as Rooks shower wall on at least 2 occasions lol)
This book was one of my most emotional reads of 2024, I was not expecting for this book to break me emotionally the way it did, touching on subjects of death of a loved one and its ongoing effects to those close to them, parental abandonment and abuse as well as the effects of being body shamed and belittled and the effects on interactions with others due to low self-esteem it causes. What made these parts particularly so effective is that as a person who has been affected by these issues personally, when you read it described on the page, you know that the person who wrote those words would only be able to describe with such intensity and intricacy because they must have personally experienced it too.
Overall, this book was an amazing read and definitely jumped up my list to top read of 2024. the characters and the plot just work seamlessly in this story, and it captivates you completely, you celebrate their wins, and you mourn their losses, and I feel so privileged to have been given the opportunity to read this as an ARC member. This story will have a special place in my heart for taking me out of my normal dark romance bubble and hitting me in the feelings like a meteor.
Tilly and Rook deserved their happy ever after, and it was a pleasure to read them get it in the end
This book releases to the public on 31/12/2024 and will be available on Amazon and KU
There’s a lot of things happening in this story, with the loss of a close loved one being the saddest. The ex boyfriend being closer than expected is an interesting twist. But the weird thing about this is how insecure the FMC is, even though she’s a bona fide rockstar. And that was seriously annoying…
Most of the characters are well fleshed out, and I really enjoyed them. Contrary to the norm, I’m not looking forward to a book about Rian because some people never recover. That’s how it worked for me, and it’s okay. Jericho is next, based on the sneak peek.
Honestly, my pregnancy hormones had me crying so hard my husband was concerned lol. It was such a gut wrenching story. Heartbreaking but so full of love with the cutest moments and even a little action. I devoured this book. I love the characters, the plot, the history of each character and how it all came together in the end. There was a lot of crying on my part. I probably would have still cried even if I wasn’t pregnant but maybe not sobbing. Who knows. This author killed it! Definitely recommend.
Really well written, with some twists thrown in. The characters are well flushed out and it never felt rushed. I really enjoyed writing it. I also cried at some parts (holidays, memories - trying to not be too detailed because of spoilers).
I wished there was something in there that hinted at Tilly and her mom’s relationship (how it fared at the end).
I really can’t wait for the rest especially Rian’s. I’m not sure I would be able to emotionally handle it based on this book and the hints thrown in.
These two together were magical. I loved how both have past trauma, but were determined to still help the other when they were needed to be lifted up and it wasn't one sided. I do wish we could find out her mother's opinion when it went on further just because how she acted is relatable to a lot of people. Loved this story!
I cried.. like a lot.. in the best way.. also in the worst. I loved every dang moment I spent reading this book! The twist at the end I could see coming from a mile away. However, what’s a romance without a little over the top drama?
Not my typical genre and it was a pretty good read. Pretty quick and easy. It was very emotional. There were a few story inconsistencies that were pretty obvious to ignore, but it wasn’t bad. Very likable characters and everything wraps up nicely.