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378 pages, Paperback
Published April 30, 2025


No matter what I did to turn things around and how hard I worked, my efforts were fruitless. Every attempt to save anyone was simply a futile endaevour.
There was no longer any point in this.
"Yan Heqing, just kill me right now. This is meaningless."
Yan Heqing's steps faltered. He came to a stop before Xiao Yu'an, the bitterness between Yan Heqing's lips slowly seeping into his heart. Xiao Yu'an's eyes, once perpetually radiating with the warmth of a smile, were now deathly vacant. Looking into them, Yan Heqing gilmpsed something so cold and desolate - like firewood that had been reduced to ashes.
It had been ages since Yan Heqing last saw Xiao Yu'an's smile. He yearned and ached for it so much that he teetered on the brink of insanity, but now, he did not even have the right to beg on his knees, if only to see Xiao Yu'an's smile one more time.

Xiao Yu'an persisted despite himself. "So what did you chase me all the way here for..."
Yan Heqing's eyes fluttered shut. He reined in his emotions, then fished out a white jade hairpin from his robes.
This was the key token of love in the novel that Yan Heqing's mother had left behind. He had given it to Xiao Yu'an to repay a debt of gratitude, but Xiao Yu'an had ultimately left it behind in the palace.
Gently, Yan Heqing murmured, "You forgot this, so I brought it to you."



Yan Heqing caught his wrist and trapped him against the floor. [...] Before Xiao Yu'an could even move, Yan Heqing had fiercely captured his lips in his.
Yan-ge, aren't you blind?! You really nailed down the spot - is this the male protagonist's seduction halo at full throttle?

Yan Heqing deepened the kiss, his tongue curling around Xiao Yu'an's with abandon. His lips were icy from being out in the rain, but heath soon replaced the chill as their lips and tongues battled. Warmth invaded every crevice of Xiao Yu'an's mouth. Their entangled tongues elicited a strange buzz from his body.

"Xiao Yu'an, you listen good. I like you, the type that makes me want to tie you to my bed so that you'd never be able to see anyone else besides me. You'd drown in pleasure every night in my embrace and plead for mercy. The corners of your eyes would flush red as I force you to your limits, your fingers buried tightly among the sheets, unable to withstand my toying touch. You'd desperately want to escape but find yourself stuck, gasping for breath even as you let out erotic moans against your will. Do you understand me?"
Xiao Yu'an swallowed hard, his throat dry. Then, he stuttered weakly, "I u-u-understand."
"Do you want to hear more?"
"H-H-Hear what?"
"Hear just how I like you."
"N-No need. I d-don't want. N-No more."


Yan Heqing rasped, "Since a simple reply is too casual for you, would me pinning you to the bed, fucking you until you're shivering from head to toe, not able to cry even if you wanted to and having no choice but to plead for mercy as the answer falls from your lips... Would that seem more reverent an answer?"

Yan Heqing's tongue traced the corners of Xiao Yu'an's mouth before he straightened, his gaze fixated on Xiao Yu'an. He stated, "Xiao Yu'an, I need an answer."
Xiao Yu'an hid his face behind his hand, taking a long moment to regain his breath. Letting his hand fall aside, he briefly mumbled before replying, "Yan-ge, after making you wait so long, I feel liek giving you a simple response is way too flipant..."

Yan Heqing caught Xiao Yu'an's chin the second he looked up, his arm coiling around his waist snugly. He tipped Xiao Yu'an's heaf backwards, ignoring the shock written across the man's face. As theirs lisp drew closer, Yan Heqing let his eys fall shut.
He turned and waved to Yan Heqing, shouting, "Yan-ge! I don't know how to ride a horse!"
That dashing and debonair man in white robes on his white steed was a sight to behold, a scene comparable to the splandeour of the four seasons. Hearing Xiao Yu'an's shout, Yan Heqing charged towards him immediately.
[...]
Yan Heqing pulled in the reins when he arrived before Xiao Yu'an, tilting to the side and reaching out to him.
Xiao Yu'an tossed Yan Heqing a grin, then grabbed his hand firmly.
Under everyone's watchful gazes, Yan Heqing tugged Xiao Yu'an into his embrace, and with a crack of the horsewhip, they
took off in haste.


It took only a few steps before he was enveloped in a gripping hold so firm, as though the man wanted nothing more than for Xiao Yu'an to fuse wuth him as one, never to leave his embrace across lifetimes.
Wrapping his arm around him, Xiao Yu'an broke into an ecstatic smile even as tears split forth despite his best efforts. "Yan-ge, I missed you so much. The only thing I've been thinking about these few months is how to find you. [...] If you're not beside me, I can't rest well. I'll be in low spirits and won't be able to eat. If you're not here, I might just succumb to this illness one of these days. Yan-ge, do you hear me?"
The hands clutching onto Xiao Yu'an tight tremored imperceptibly. Yan Heqing nodded, sounding a little chocked as he hummed in response and answered, "I hear you."

"Yan-ge, I'm sorry. See? I'm always making you wait for me and for so long too! After you were done waiting, you still had to search for me everywhere. There's so much of my heart and feelings that I owe you. In this case, I'll make it up to you. How about that? I'll give you this lifetime - no, I'll give you even the next. What do you say?"
Yan heqing croaked, "...Yes."
"Yan-ge, I like you."
Xiao Yu'an intended to make this declaration to the heavens and earth repeatedly, but after the first time, Yan heqing had already surged forward to seal Xiao Yu'an's lips with his.

4,5 'Flute and hairpin' stars ⭐⭐⭐⭐/⭐
4 'Finding each other again' stars ⭐⭐⭐⭐This volume is more slow-paced than the previous one. There're some truly hilarious scenes and some devastatingly sad as well. The misunderstanding between the main characters might drive one crazy but they're necessary for the plot.
Although this volume occurs during a war between countries, battle scenes are scarce and described vaguely, so I didn't feel the whole war atmosphere. This is especially true after the Northern Kingdom is defeated and the Southern Kingdom is at war with the Eastern Wu Kingdom. The MC is laying low as a physician, treating the wounded soldiers irrespective of their country of origin.
There're some really funny scenes, like when the MC gets drunk with Li Wuding. The fate of Li Wuding and his soldiers was truly devastating, it was one of the most emotional parts of the novel. The scene where Xiao Yu'An and Yan Heqing part ways after the Northern Kingdom lost the battle and surrendered was heartbreaking. There're many misunderstandings between them and it will take a lot of time until they can finally be together.
The emotional scenes are very well-written, and the humour is also on point. The characters are a bit one-dimensional but this is a simple, light-hearted story, so you shouldn't expect anything complex when reading it.
The marriage of the two princesses was also included in the novel. The scene itself wasn't that memorable except for the appearance of that mysterious person, who looks like the MC.
Xiao Yu'An's reunion with Yan Heqing was sweet. Although I've no idea how he didn't realize that Yan Heqing already recognized him that's why he behaved the way he did. Still, it was heartwarming and sweet, especially after they finally talked things through. The new side characters are funny as hell, especially how they all see through the main characters and realize they love each other way before even Xiao Yu'An himself realizes it. And they use their matchmaking skills to bring the two together. XD At one point General Chen even does it while Xiao Yu'An is treating his injuries after a battle. XD It's like one hilarious scene after another. But the thing is that in this novel, many funny scenes are usually followed by a tragedy. And sure enough, Xiao Yu'An's real identity is exposed and he can only escape with the help of General Chen.
It was an interesting read and all the comedy gold scenes balance the tragic scenes quite well. The characters' emotions are portrayed very well even if the story itself is quite predictable.