How to Be a Living Thing: Meditations on Intuitive Oysters, Hopeful Doves, and Being Human in the World

by Mari Andrew

A luminous collection of essays exploring the lessons we can incorporate from the animal world in order to live more fully as humans

A shelter cat teaches us that our damaged parts, too, are worthy of love... a captive orca shows us that inconvenience and difficulties are the blessing of a full life... a gorilla teaches the universal language of grief... a group of oysters who prove that magic and science can and do coexist… 

In How to Be a Living Thing, Mari Andrew reflects on the ways animals mirror, challenge, and deepen our experiences as living creatures in the world. Through her personal stories and explorations into the inner world of other creatures, Mari illuminates the opportunities and wonders of being a living thing. Highly-sensitive horses, overly-cautious donkeys, and silly social rats are just a few of the animal teachers who offer us glimpses of the glories and shortcomings of humanity.

Heartwarming, funny, and insightful, How to Be a Living Thing reminds us that we are perfectly imperfect beings, capable of profound connection with each other and with all other species of the remarkable natural world that surrounds us.

Genres: Nonfiction, Nature, Self Help, Essays, Animals, Audiobook, Adult

253 pages, Kindle Edition

Published July 15, 2025

About the author

Mari Andrew is a writer and illustrator based in New York City.

Mari Andrew's career started as a hobby in 2015 when she was recovering from a painful break-up and the death of her father. She started holding herself accountable to posting one doodle per day on Instagram. Her following eventually grew and she currently has over 750,000 followers.Andrew's first book, Am I There Yet?: The Loop-de-loop, Zigzagging Journey to Adulthood, debuted March 27, 2018.

Reviews

[Madelyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love animals and I love every word Mari Andrew has ever written so obviously 5/5 stars

[Michael · Rating 2 out of 5]

A odd little book. Basically, here reflections on the animal world and how paying attention to their behavior can make us better human beings. Or something like that. It didn’t make a lot of sense to me. She wrote a self-help book to herself, and she could have kept it to herself too. I love animals and I love reading about them, I just don’t love this book.

I hate essay books.

Thanks to Viking Penguin for the free Advance Uncorrected Proof of the book.

[Jax · Rating 4 out of 5]

In these essays, Mari Andrew’s wants to encourage us to spend more time with animals as a means of exploration. Doing so can bring our similarities to bear, such as the shared impact confinement has on humans and Orcas alike and how most creatures respond to pain or loss. We can discover the unique and inexplicable abilities non-human creatures might possess. Oysters, for example, adjust feeding schedules around moon cycles and can do so in a Midwest basement with no moonlight cues. These and other essays are fascinating. Some less successful ones include Andrews’s comparison of humans who enjoy moving locations to the nomadic nature of snow leopards. While the comparison holds, the human gypsy subset is limited while the pool of roving or nomadic animal species is quite large.

Thank you to PENGUIN GROUP Viking Penguin | Penguin Life and NetGalley for providing this eARC

[Helen Catherine Darby · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars -

Like everything Mari Andrew writes, this book is beautiful, sensitive, and poignant. It prompted me to look at the world a different way, to question my own beliefs and habits, to appreciate the stunning diversity and sacred interrelatedness of all life.

[Samantha Olson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book brought so much warmth to my heart. Andrew portrays the world in the way I wish I saw it…but through her writing she’s helping me along. This book was so cozy and compassionate…it brought tears to my eyes while simultaneously filling my heart. I loved it! The parallels she drew between different animals and the human experience were lovely.

[Shelf Discovery · Rating 4 out of 5]

Finally an odd book for an odd animal-holic person like me, thank God for all the living things on this Earth.

[Sue Fernandez · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a lovely, timely, calming book. Mari Andrew has managed to write essays, using the animal world to lead us along the way. The author actually loves humans, which isn't always the case with animal lovers. Right now, we can all use a bit of calm, insightful thoughts...and this book gives us that.

Thank you to Penguin Life and Net Galley for a digital ARC of this title in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own.

#HowToBeALivingThing #MariAndrew #PenguinLife #NetGalley

[Caitlin · Rating 3 out of 5]

I adore Mari Andrew but this was a mixed bag. I found 1/2 of it profound and 1/2 of it an uncomfortable and voyeur-ish exploiting of certain NYC populations à la Mark Cohen in RENT all those years ago.

[Tom Troiani · Rating 5 out of 5]

not for everyone but I thought it was worth the read.....the chapter towards the end about dogs is both interesting and tragic

[Sarah Street · Rating 2 out of 5]

This wasn’t the book I thought it was going to be, but I still read it. I thought it was going to be a bit more scientific and focused a lot on the animals it features. Each chapter is given one animal + theme, but it isn’t really about the animals. It reads more like a memoir / quasi-self-help book and then the author later was like “how can I connect these thoughts about screen time to an animal?” This book was more about the author than how to be a living thing.

[Jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a welcome reprieve from the heft of the world lately. Just one reminder after another at the beauty of being alive and human. “But I never forgot their reverence toward the sacred Maybe, a word that has saved generations from the threat of Never.” - Chapter 17, On Mourning Doves and Trying Again

[Brianna · Rating 3 out of 5]

A book for the deeply feeling animal lovers, a reminder that we’re more like our beloved pets like dogs and cats, as well as wild animals like snow leopards and pigeons, than we often remember. Mari Andrew mixes in personal anecdotes about her life and beliefs while helping us relate those experiences to the animal world. The book has whimsical drawings of animals made by the author between each chapter, which you’ll recognize as her own if you’ve read any of her other books or followed her on social media. Some of the chapters resonated more than others but overall it was an enjoyable book.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing an ARC in exchange for my honest review.

[Elisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the best, more poignant and significant books I’ve ever read. Mari Andrew looks at the animal world for inspiration on her daily life and shares those teachings. This is not my kind of read, I am a cynical Gen-Xer who loathes hearing about people’s feelings. But I’m also an inveterate animal lover and I read anything and everything about them. This is not a scientific volume, Mari (I usually use author’s last names but I feel like she and I could be friends so I’m going with her first) doesn’t share hard data and her information about behavioral and other type of experiments comes from what she’s read, sometimes even from the internet, or from what people have told her. And anecdotal information is my favorite. She even mentions Frans de Waal, probably my favorite ethologist. But she also states right from the beginning how she’s not like those people who love all animals, except for humans. Well, I am that type of person and Mari opened my eyes to her way of thinking. I always thought that moving the homeless to shelters was a good thing but, through this book, I saw this from a different perspective that horrified me. Mari doesn’t preach, never tries to impose her way of thinking on her readers, she just talks about what she thinks and how arrived to that conclusion, without acting like she’s better than anybody (including non-human animals). Who would think to compare our lockdown situation of a few years ago to orcas in captivity? It’s an eye-opening, amazing book and I will recommend it to everyone, regardless of age, political opinion or religious beliefs. Wow! Just wow!
I chose to read this book and all opinions in this review are my own and completely unbiased. Thank you, NetGalley/Penguin Life.

[Danielle Cappolla · Rating 4 out of 5]

"How to Be a Living Thing" is a thought-provoking series of essays by writer and artist, Mari Andrew. Andrew ponders lessons learned from observing animals and relates them to human behavior and emotions.

Each essay compares and contrasts humans and animals while exploring greater themes of connection. Andrew intersperses facts about animals and musings about human behavior with anecdotes of her own life. The book also offers advice for connection. 

The book itself had the calm and warmth of a cup of tea. Andrew uses figurative language, metaphors, allegory and lyrical imagery to illustrate her points. Her writing flows with varied pacing, depending on the topic. The book has short chapters, making it easy to read episodically or all at once. 

Thank you to NetGalley and PENGUIN GROUP Viking Penguin for the ARC. All opinions are my own. 

[Paige Zalewski · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 / 5 stars for me. I found it a lovely little book, but perhaps a bit scattered. Maybe I expected more a cohesive narrative with Mari’s part? Regardless, I’ve been a fan of Mari’s writing for years now and continued to enjoy it here.

This book would be best experienced by sitting down and reading one chapter a day. (I wish I did that to allow a bit of time to reflect on what I just read before diving into the next!) A few insights came across too preachy, and potentially holier-than-thou, which I imagine could turn off some readers.

The parts that stood out were the first chapter about orcas, the zebra chapter about community (are zebras my new favorite animals??? 🦓), and the pigeon chapter. It definitely opened my eyes to new ways of seeing animals and their connection to us..which I think was the whole point!

[Jodi Graham · Rating 3 out of 5]

There was so much about this book that I liked and found interesting, but for some reason, parts just didn’t resonate. I wanted to love it, but just couldn’t get there. The repeated use of the phrase, “I felt it in my belly” caused an irrational irritation in me. It was just me, there’s nothing wrong with the phrase. The animal facts and research were the most compelling parts for me- ostriches and zebras working together? Who knew?

“Our behavior is contradictory. The same people who advanced lyrical poetry also grief belief fed their citizens to lions and cheered from the seats of the Colosseum.”

“Perhaps the answer lies in GK Chesterton‘s melancholy quote. The world will never starve for want of wonders. But only for want of wonder.“

[Oyuka Baatar · Rating 5 out of 5]

1. On cats and embracing humanness

2. On gorillas and sharing in grief

3. On panthers and paying closer attention

4. On bears and being a body

5. On horses and listening to intuition

6. On gibbons and committing to connection

7. On zebras and staying safe in community

8. On crocodiles and trusting the future

9. On chickens and learning new languages

10. On oysters and believing in the miraculous

11. On cardinals and creating your own holiness

12. On rats and valuing the other

13. On snow leopards and adapting to new places

14. On donkeys and questioning intelligence

15. On pigeons and bringing the outsiders in

16. On wolves and becoming natural

17. On mourning doves and trying again

18. On humans and being a living thing

[Mallory Flynn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Truly stunning. I managed to get a signed copy on the day it came out at a reading in D.C. (Thank you, Mari!) It was clear from the Q&A alone that many view Mari as a sage as they asked her a wide variety of life questions with tears in their eyes. This book is so good it was almost a one-day read for me, I’ve already ordered it for a friend and plan to have two more on the way for people who it’s a perfect gift for. Thank you for always giving me faith, Mari.

[Sekar Writes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Full review and summary.

I really loved how Andrew drew parallels between humans and the animal world, showing that our contradictions, flaws, and even our capacity for empathy aren’t so different from other creatures. My favorite chapter was the one on rats. It made me pause and rethink how I view judgment and empathy, often in ways that people around me wouldn’t have expected.

[Dorothy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m grateful for the existence of Mari Andrew, she is a gift to the world. This beautiful book offers a reminder of the potential greatness of human existence, and how many lessons we can learn from our animal companions on this earth. No one I’ve come across is more articulate in expressing meditative reflections on life than Mari. Read this book if you want to be inspired by her craft and her intuitive way of expressing the world’s hidden treasure.

[Halli Morgan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Gotta be honest, I kinda hated this book. It had some nice things to say about what we can learn from animals (some very interesting animal facts btw), but some of the writing felt sooooo condescending and self-serving that I found myself cringing through the book. Also, I hate a “How To” book that gives no actual practical actions to take other than “put your phone down, go for a walk, and drink water”.

[Kelly Martin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed how creatively this book was laid out and interpreted for the reader in such a deep and wholesome way.

All in all, it was an insightful read to learn more about myself, animals, embodiment, what it means to be a person and a friend and so much more. I enjoyed expanding my thinking and reading about things from Mari's point of view! Lovely read.

[Cara Hinton · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book's author has a "Pro-species" point of view. All species are equal and have an equally valid reason to be on the plant. As humans we are too focused on hating other humans and wanting to kill animals who are not human, and some who are. This is a good book for anyone who wants to better relate to animals and enjoy the unconditional love they will give in return.

[Sarah Gerbers · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a lovely collection of essays! Of course her mix between Christianity and evolution beliefs does not align with my own; but aside from that, I truly enjoyed the parallels she made between our life experiences and the lessons we can learn from the animal world. Her writing is beautiful, as always!

[Brooke · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lovely meditation to end the year: to reframe the way we view animals and humans, to learn from the beautiful behaviors and feelings animals experience, and to lead with kindness towards all living beings. I didn't love every essay or every idea but overall really enjoyed these and hope to take the spirit of them forward into the new year.

[Lucia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm a big fan of Mari Andrews, and it was such a treat to hear her talk about this book in person. How to Be a Living Thing is definitely a different from her earlier work, but it still offers plenty of her signature insights and unique perspectives on life.

[Amanda Jackson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Breathtaking and beautiful. I wish everyone would read this; I truly believe the world would be softer and slower and gentler if they did. What a joy to exist in the same huge and hurting and heavy and lovely world as sweet Mari. Oh how I adore her work and eye and heart and spirit.

[Sarah Guenther · Rating 5 out of 5]

Instant favorite. Five pages in I wanted to buy a copy for every person I have ever felt kinship with. I know I will be rereading this often throughout my life.

Mari Andrews is a treasure. Her essays are enveloping and poignant. I already want to reread it.

[Veronika Senzer · Rating 4 out of 5]

8/10

Up there in one of the most eye-opening book I’ve read this year. Duh- doesn’t it make so much sense animals experience grief, speak different languages, and know how to create community!!!! We so often forget it!!!!

[Nicole · Rating 3 out of 5]

It’s a good low-stakes, feel good bedside table book, chapters are pretty short so it fits into a nightly reading routine well.

The content isn’t as inspiring or interesting as I’d hoped and it kind of bummed me out that not all the animal information was factual.