The Long Refrain

Sweet Southern #4

by Maya Jean

Benji

I’m the sunshine one. The one that no one ever worries about. The one who makes everyone laugh. The one who keeps his crap together. But one night with a rockstar threatens to unravel all my carefully built defenses. Nolan pushes all my buttons, transforming me into someone I’ve never been before. After a few nights as his escort, he whisks me away on his world tour to promote his new album. And with each passing day, I grow more worried for us, unsure if either of us will survive the tour.

Nolan

Rags to riches. I’m living the dream. A rockstar adored by the masses, but no one knows that every time I step on stage, it almost kills me. All that keeps me alive these days are my stolen trysts with Benji, a hired lover. Bringing him on tour with me was both the smartest and dumbest decision I’ve ever made. He keeps me grounded and gives me hope, and it’ll be a miracle if we both come out alive.

The Long Refrain is the fourth book in the Sweet Southern series. While it can be read as a standalone, this series is best enjoyed in order. This book contains a black cat and a hopelessly besotted golden retriever, hurt/comfort, rockstar/escort, mental health rep, and power dynamics. Please heed the trigger warnings at the front of the book.

Genres: M M Romance, Found Family, Romance, Mental Health, Contemporary Romance, Musicians, Contemporary

238 pages, Kindle Edition

Published March 19, 2025

About the author

Maya spends most of her time imagining happily ever afters for the characters that live in her head. If she's not plotting how to heal broken hearts for her characters then she’s spending time with her precocious daughter. She loves baking competitions, listening to the same song on repeat for months, and discussing the latest pop culture event in a group chat with her best friends.

Reviews

[patrícia · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 ⭐️ 🎸
The moment I realized the author described Nolan as sounding like Chris Cornell, I immediately fainted—then slap myself awake just to read with that voice in my head. 🖤

The tropes:
▪️Black cat and a hopelessly besotted Sunshine
▪️Hurt/comfort
▪️Rockstar/escort
▪️Mental health rep
▪️Power dynamics
▪️Codependency
▪️Found Family
▪️Angel & Stud
▪️Small town for life

I have a weakness for broken boys who just need to accept love. And Nolan? He fits perfectly. Always pushing, hissing, scratching, screaming… but deep down, he just needs a Sunshine.Benji ❤️

I absolutely loved their journey. Touching, troubled, bumpy as hell—but so rewarding. So many layers, so much pain and self-loathing… god. So desperate at times. I especially loved how Nolan would just look at Benji and see hope… until darkness swallowed him again. That night on the balcony? Nearly broke me. The despair—from both of them. I haven’t cried in a while, but for Nolan and Benji? I couldn’t stop.

This is not an easy book, and knowing the author’s personal connection made it even heavier. I completely see why this story took a toll on Maya.

Their journey was one of discovery—rough and soft all at once. I’m so proud of Nolan. The way he fought? Inspiring. The strongest baby boy. And Benji? Pure light (wrapped in his own darkness). A treasure.

I also loved that they healed together, worked around their insecurities, but stayed themselves. Not all hearts and flowers, but thorns too. And healing needs therapy—I’m so glad we got to go through that with them. It made everything feel even more real.

Sex? Ohhh, it started with biting, kicking, wrecking each other, then turned soft, mellow, and somehow both at once. Absolutely loved that. Again—real.

“Make me feel it,” Nolan demands, voice low and rough.
“Don’t I always?”

Standing ovation for Chris, Eli, Trevor, Jackson, Beau, Colby, Harper, and the Moms. ❤️ My heart missed a beat when Mom hugged Nolan. 🥹

“Just us, angel.”
I breathe in deeply, living in the glowing, beautiful knowledge that my life is finally mine. Belonging somewhere never seemed possible, yet here I am now. The future spans before me with all the promise of Benji’s lips moving tenderly against mine. With Benji, I’m myself. Always just us.

TW
Rough sex (biting/slapping/marking)
Suicidal ideation
Self-hate
Breathplay / consensual choking
CNC
On-page suicide attempt (NOT GRAPHIC)
Past abuse in the foster care system (not sexual abuse)
Death of a grandparent
Attempted suicide of a parent
Parents with addiction
Parental abandonment
Disassociation as a coping mechanism
Past self-harm Depression

[Brooke · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐️ 4.5 stars ⭐️

🎵𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 — 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇 𝐎𝐅 𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐛𝐲 𝐁𝐚𝐝 𝐎𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐬🎵

// I made another mistake, thought I could change
Thought I could make it out
Promises break, need to hear you say
You're gonna keep it now //

TROPES:
🎸 Rockstar vs escort
🎸 Mental health rep
🎸 Hurt/comfort
🎸 Golden retriever vs black cat

«I wonder what it would be like to keep him.»

The Long Refrain was both heart-breaking and a sweet love story. You’re right Maya Jean, seeing Nolan find love and happiness helps glue back together my own cracks a little.

“Life can come from something decaying if you only let it.” Benji tenderly sweeps his thumbs over the flowers tangled with my ribs. “What’s decaying?” “Me”

Nolan’s story hurts and I really resonated with part of it, but the super loving and sweet romance definitely made this read lighter than I feared it would be. Benji was perfect, sunshine personified. I loved the dynamic between the characters, the found family, Nolan letting himself be taken care of.

The ghosts don’t seem nearly as scary when he holds me as I fall asleep.

I keep rewriting this part trying to not get too in my feels and I’m starting to spiral so just gonna end this review. Hi, this was a great read. Highly recommend. Ok ciao.
A sweet hurt/comfort romance with a hopeful happy ending, a broken soul finding his other half and getting to keep him.

“Two halves of the same whole, you and I. Just us.”

I received a copy of this book from Gay Romance Reviews, and this is my honest review.

CW and NSFW info (spoilers):
- Self-hate & depression
- Past self-harm
- Suicide attempt (on page, not graphic)
- Suicidal ideation
- Mentions of past abuse in foster care (not sexual)
- Parental abandonment
- Disassociation
- Mostly top/bottom (one switch scene)
- Rough sex
- Biting
- Breath play
- CNC
- Rimming
- Coming hands-free

[Whitney · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 ⭐️
Benji + Nolan 🖤
Rockstar and Escort | Mental health rep | Golden retriever + Grump

I hope I go the rest of my life without ever reading 'stud' as a serious pet name again. I can't take it seriously at all.

Really though, this book was good. Great mental health rep. Great found family. Great deep love, even if they were trying to deny it for so long.

I do feel like some parts were trying to meet a word count so it felt a little tedious at times.

But lots of respect for handling such deep topics so well.


....

"I'll be damned if I tell the man I love him at a fucking redneck bonfire."

....



⚠️potential spoilers below in detailed tropes, content and warning lists






Tropes/content:
Angry closeted rockstar
Sunshine escort
Broken boy
"Golden retriever piece of shit" 😂
Benji clocks Nolan immediately and flips the script by dominating him instead of what he pretends to want. Benji gives him what he needs
Hands free 💦
Lots of biting
Benji provides aftercare and convinces Nolan to let himself be held in the bath tub
Nolan doesnt like his dick to be touched
Nolan refuses to look at him self in the mirror
Back and forth, hot and cold MC
Insta dick
Fast feelings that they try not to feel
Biting, slapping, choking during sex
Nolan requests exclusivity contract through the escort service after their first meeting and pays double so Benji doesn't have to take on other clients
Skinny dipping in the pool
CNC turned tear filled, tender, love making
Benji's first time going raw with someone
Nolan really struggled to sleep before Benji - Benji didnt realise until Nolan's manager mentioned it on the plane when Nolan fell asleep against Benji's shoulder
Benji talks Nolan off a ledge, literally
"If you jump, I jump"
Benji changes shirts with Nolan for his first therapy appointment so he has his smell with him 🥺
Found family
"Angel"
Mostly strict roles with one switch on page - Nolan's first time topping and Benji's first time bottoming. They said they just wanted to have tried everything with each other but they will stick to original roles
Epilogue 3 years later - they have a dog, benji owns a restaurant, they have matching 'just us' tattoos, Nolan proposed (demanded) marriage



Warnings:
Trauma
Self destructive behavior
Self punishment
Self hatred
Suicidal ideation
At one point Benji gets out of the shower to find Nolan sitting on the edge of a hotel balcony ready to jump
Nolan inappropriately flirts and taunts some of Benji's friends, making everyone uncomfortable in the beginning. It feels like he's not really flirting just trying to be an asshole.
Nolan is an addict but sober, discussions of relapsing
Some dark humor

[Alexandra · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received a copy of this book from Gay Romance Reviews, and this is my honest review.

Rating: 5 ⭐️

Did I finish this book, or did the book finish me? That's a good question. This story meant so much to me; it's probably my favorite of The Sweet Southern series.

It's not a secret that I'm a huge fan of Maya Jean's writing; she has a way with words, and every book of hers I've read are rated five stars, so it's no surprise that The Long Refrain is another success.

It was a beautiful journey. Following Benji and Nolan's love story was heartwarming. So much healing, I get emotional just thinking about them. The way these guys loved each other? Urgh.

"The air from my lungs won’t be enough, I think I need to give him my heart."

I highly anticipated their story, especially when I was reading the previous book. Neither Benji or Nolan were what I was expecting. For example, I didn't picture Benji this...hot. So color me surprised when I read quotes like this:

“Put your hands on the headboard, Nolan,” Benji orders, breath fanning across my back with each word.

Alright. I may or may not have grin like a fool. Yeah definitively. Benji just stole the first place in my heart, just saying. I'm sorry, Jackson, but my heart goes to Benji. I swooned so much, just because of him.

It was exactly what I needed. I highlighted so many quotes, and I could have highlighted many more, if not the whole book. That’s how much I loved Benji and Nolan. The gestures toward each other, the devotion, everything about them was beautifully done.

The found family in this series was perfectly done. I'm so happy Maya didn't reduce Benji and Nolan to just them. They had a family made of great friends who have each other's backs. Harper and Benji's friendship was adorable. And of course, the moments Benji shared with his squad -- Eli, Trevor, and Jackson -- were wholesome. I appreciated how the author portrayed their bond. It was really important to me.

I could write many more words about how much I loved this book. But I feel like I'll just repeat myself. Honestly, I can't believe it's the end (for now), because I'll miss these characters so much. This is a series I'll think about for a long time.

"I don’t think I’ll ever want you to leave. You’re”—he presses his hand to his chest with a grimace—“in here now… you’re in here, and I want to keep you forever."

[Mx. T *Chaotic Reader* · Rating 5 out of 5]

✨ARC REVIEW✨

Everytime I get an ARC by Maya Jean I know she's gonna break my heart into little pieces for 60% of the book and then spend the 40% left mending it with care. This book was no exception. In fact this book is the ultimate healing experience for anyone who has been depressed, s*icidal, and has felt that they don't belong anywhere and to anyone. We get our last fake boyfriend story, Benji, who is hired by famous rockstar, Nolan Hastings. Benji is an amazing character, steadfast and supportive and understanding. He truly sees Nolan and gives him what he needs. Nolan is suffering. A LOT. He's famous and admired but he has a tragic past and he feels there's no future for him. I love how there's no magic healing in their relationship, Benji is just a place for Nolan to land softly while he works on himself. And ofc, we get the whole gang to support them. I loved Harper and Nolan together. And I loved how all of them took care of both him and Benji. Because who takes care of the caretaker if not his friends? This was heavy on the hurt/comfort, and on the healing aspect of having people around you that remind you you deserve to be loved and are, in fact, loved just for being your true self.

I cried, but not in the parts I expected to. It wad the gentle moments, the ones that are pure softness and raw emotion that made me cry.

Beautiful romance with amazing depression rep. Beware of the TW, take care of yourselves.

[Stacktheforest - Natalie · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5/5 ⭐️ I absolutely adore this series by Maya Jean. She has written another stunner with some dark twists and turns for her new book, The Long Refrain. This is the story of Benji and Nolan, a rockstar and his escort. The themes are dark and it delves deep into some mental health struggles. Make sure to check your triggers.

- Rockstar/Escort
- Rough Play
- Mental Health Rep
- Found Family

As always the writing was impeccable, her writing style is so poetic and beautiful. She made me instantly fall in love with the main characters and I couldn’t stop reading until the book was complete.

I thought the integration of the characters from the rest of the series made the found family aspect of this book one of my favourite things. The community that they built and support between friends was truly unmatched.

This book was provided as an ARC and this review is my honest opinion.

[Alexis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nolan and Benji are black cat/golden retriever perfection. Nolan is a talent rockstar but performing and touring gives him great anxiety and depression. To cope, he hires an escort where he can focus his pain in a more physical sense. Benji is sunshine (iykyk ;) ). He sees right through Nolan and offers something Nolan can’t refuse: let Benji be in control. Benji takes care of Nolan in many different ways but the most important way is by being a solid foundation and supporter for Nolan getting the help he needs.

Nolan’s story is really one of finding a way to do the thing you love and continuing to love it without fear or anxiety. Nolan is so, so very sad but I was happy to see besides Benji, his manager Chris was also very much on his side. He had a lot of people who loved him and wanted him to get better and though he didn’t always know what to do with that I think it was important for him to realize he’s not alone.

One thing I loved was that Benjis love didn’t “cure”
Nolan. Benji suddenly being in Nolan’s life didn’t make him less depressed but it didn’t give him the energy to put in effort to getting better.

Anyway, as always Maya Jeans characters go right to the heart and the dynamic between the two are the perfect balance of teasing and being soulmates.

“Is kissing allowed?” Benji asks quietly. “If you’re a good kisser,” I reply. Benji’s lips twitch again in obvious amusement. “I’m a great kisser.”

TW; seriously head the TW with this book! Nolan is very depressed and does have suicidal thoughts.

[Ellie ♡ · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Long Refrain resonated deeply with me, I was completely hooked.

Nolan is a lost boy. A young rockstar with the world at his feet, yet nothing brings him joy. He’s lonely, depressed, stuck in his own head, and dissociates as a coping mechanism.

And then there’s Benji, who is pure sunshine to Nolan’s darkness. He figures out Nolan’s needs so quickly and gives him everything he can, but he also knows something deeper is going on. Slowly, he becomes Nolan’s solace, his anchor, his balm, his safe place.

I cried so much while reading this book. I had to take a break halfway through because it was impossible for me to keep reading with tears in my eyes. These boys broke me into pieces. The Long Refrain is such a beautiful story about mental illness, self-love, resilience, healing, the power of friendship, found family and most of all, love. Love with a capital L. Benji shows Nolan what love and care look like for the first time in his life. He helped him see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Nolan and Benji’s story is about two souls finding each other and never letting go. About how love, when it’s real, can be your greatest strength. How finding your person can change your whole life. They’re two angels and I love them deeply.

This series was incredible and I’m sad to see it end. I love all the books and how they’re all interconnected. And I adore all the characters so much, their stories truly matter to me. To see them all together was the cherry on top (especially Harper and Jackson because they’re my favourites)! It’s a series I will definitely reread.

What to expect:
🎸 Black cat x Golden retriever
🖤 Rockstar x Escort
🎸 Mental illness rep (depression)
🖤 Found family
🎸 Hurt/Comfort

[Catarina Águas · Rating 4 out of 5]

ARC review

This book was so sweet, it hit right in the feelings.
Nolan was lost and broken, his life was miserable and he was so done. Then came Benji that changed everything for him. Benji's sunny disposition and relentless support, Nolan managed to come out from the other side.
Benji was really sweet and a really good person. He just wanted the people he loved to be happy

[Iz · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well, this was a delight.
I think Jackson and Harper's story will always be my favourite, but Benji and Nolan's a close second. I adored their romance!
Maya Jean excels in her more angstier stories: don't get me wrong, I do love cute and fluffy, but I'm always going to be an angst girlie first and foremost. That's why this one, and the previous book, are my favourites in this series: they pack a punch.
And, as I adored the chronic disability rep in the previous book, I adored the mental health rep in this one too: I keep saying this, but romance authors should step the hell up and finally start including more physical and mental health rep in their stories.
I was so glad for Nolan's character: Maya Jean did a wonderful job at portraying depression and suicide ideation in a realistic, albeit gut-wrenching, way. You could see it came from a really personal place, and it really, really resonated. These past few years haven't been easy for me either, but seeing a smidge of myself represented on page is always such a balm to the soul. So thank you for that, Maya Jean.

Anyway, back to the romance.
I adored Benji and Nolan to bits: they were fabulous characters, especially Nolan (I have a soft spot for black cat brats with issues a mile long), and I loved their slowly-developing romantic arc too. For once, I was very glad that a few time jumps were included. I think they were absolutely needed to make Nolan and Benji's emotional connection even more powerful.
Nolan, like I said, was my favourite, but Benji was a delight too. Protective, sunshine-y and strong but I appreciated his more vulnerable moments even more.
I loved their romance: they made me swoon quite a lot! Seeing them reach their HEA was immensely satisfying.

< I turn my head to look at Nolan with a tender smile that he tries very hard to match. “He’s my…” I pause and stare down at Nolan. There’s no word that really describes him. Nothing is enough, everything is too little. “He’s mine.” >

I LOVED the second part of the book. Being back in Clay Springs was so lovely, and I ADORED seeing the previous characters again. Especially Harper.
His and Nolan's unexpected friendship made me weep: ugh, my babies.

I'm so very sad this will probably be the end of this series. I was eagerly waiting for Lee and Joey's story, but I wholly understand not being in the right mental space to continue with a series. I really hope Maya Jean will be back for them one day, but in the meantime... I adored this fourth novel, and the ending was absolutely perfect, sweet and warm and emotional, and so very satisfying.

TWs/CWs: depression, panic attacks, dissociation, suicide ideation and attempt (past and on page), self-harm (past), disordered eating, parental abandonment, foster care abuse (past, not sexual).

Many thanks to the author for the ARC. This is my honest review.

[read_romance.withgloria Gloria Worlikar · Rating 5 out of 5]

THE RAWEST AND MOST HEARTFELT STORY IN THIS SERIES.

I’ve been eagerly waiting for Benji and Nolan’s story since they were introduced in the previous books of this incredible series, and they did not disappoint. This book is packed with raw emotions, heartfelt moments, and a strong, supportive found family. 

We’ve known Benji as a fake boyfriend/escort, who meets Nolan, a rockstar, as a client. From their first meeting, Benji is undeniably drawn to him. But more than that, he sees something in Nolan that others don’t—and he does his best to give him what he needs, in the only way Nolan knows how to accept: through sex. However, Nolan’s anxiety, caused by the very thing he loves most—music—adds another layer to their story. I love how the author ensures that sex is not a magical cure for his anxiety. Instead, Nolan seeks professional help, and Benji stands by him through it all. 

The first half of the book is deeply emotional, filled with moments that had me teary-eyed. And Nolan? I adored him so freaking much. The second half is sweeter, with cameos from previous characters that make the story even richer. I especially loved how everyone embraced Nolan, supporting him and Benji through everything. But the real highlight? Nolan and Harper’s friendship—they’re absolute troublemakers, keeping Benji and Jackson on their toes. 

Benji and Nolan’s HEA is hard-earned and incredibly satisfying. I loved every second of it. I can’t wait to read more from this author. If you’re looking for a series that’s sweet, spicy, swoony, and packed with emotions that might leave you choked up (but in the best way), I highly recommend picking this one up. It’s absolutely worth it. 

* I received an ARC copy from GRR and this is my honest review *

[Ash · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was under no illusion that this would be an easy read but I was honestly surprised. Even with the subject matter (check triggers) it still felt like everything was handled with such care. Like the things Nolan was going through weren’t meant to tear the reader apart, but more educate us on his mindset.

There were things that were more glossed over than I expected but I think it all culminated in a beautiful story of a broken man finding himself with the help of his unexpected golden retriever 🥹

Benji was always mysterious and Nolan was the hush-hush client that everyone knew about and no one wanted to work with.

You could feel, from their first meeting, that they were going to be special.

I love how their story came to be and I’m so happy for this return to Clay Springs 🥹

I received a complimentary copy of this book but this is my honest and voluntary review 🖤

[verlorenimbuecherregal · Rating 3 out of 5]

For short: As an ending to the series it's beautiful. The story on its own unfortunately has flaws especially in the mental illness rep.

I kinda feel bad leaving a review including criticism, because Maya is a lovely human being, I adored especially the first two books from this series and I'm looking forward to everything that comes from her. And I also know that having something negative to say about a book so close to an author's heart can hurt, so I'm really hoping Maya doesn't read this - after all, reviews are for readers. Distorting the reviews with too positive reviews because the author struggles with criticism also makes it difficult for readers to know if a book is worth their time and sometimes money, so it just doesn't sit right with me and I decided to be "brutally" honest even tho I really really like Maya.

And I did love a lot about this book, beginning with the presence of the Sweet Southern found family who all have their own spot in my heart. Their support for Benji and Nolan was gorgeous and Harper and Nolan's friendship developing was really beautiful and I loved to witness that. Both Nolan and Benji as characters were lovable and while they had their flaws, they also were super sweet souls who just deserved finding their better half - and having a bit grumpy x sunshine but a bit differentiated also was really good. Also Nolan calling something romantic nice but boring is my vibe 😂 And I loved the "huge hockey player Grayson" as a link to JJ Mulder's universe, that's such a sweet homage.

So the ground work or rather the ground plotting was solid, but it lacked in the execution. There were a lot of time jumps in the process of them getting to know each other and overall the book felt very rushed. They spent so much time together that wasn't shown on page, which would be fine if it then was told instead (even if show don't tell still is an important stylistic device), but it seemed like nothing changed in the dynamic between them even though they've spent SO much time together, they just stayed where they left off. So naturally there would have been at least some kind of development and as a reader that felt rather unnatural- so I didn't get a feeling for their dynamic. It's also not really clear why Benji is interested in Nolan at first - he gets to know Nolan only as super grumpy and pushing him away, and I guess Benji's heart is just made of gold and he has a kind of saviour complex, but we never see the spark igniting, Benji only ever talks about Nolan being interesting and worthy of love (which he definitely is, don't get me wrong, but I would have loved to see even a glimpse of vulnerability in the beginning.

The book is rather short with 238 pages for such a deep topic regarding mental health issues and unfortunately this is palpable - in not getting a grip on the characters' dynamic (the switch from Nolan being irritated with Benji to him liking Benji also was super sudden and it just didn't feel right) and also in not giving the mental health issues the space they needed. And that's my big problem with the book, because I think there are learnings regarding mental illness in there, that are quite dangerous to share them with people who might be affected by a mental illness. I do wanna say Benji's perspective as a loved one of a person with a mental illness was executed well - thinking you have to be strong all the time for the struggling person despite struggling yourself, and constantly being unbelievably scared the other person might hurt or unal!ve themselves. The only issue I've got here is that Benji doesn't talk about that with Nolan throughout the whole book - he only ever speaks to his best friend, which is valid for the beginning, but I think talking to your loved one about things that burden you and finding a way to work with that is key for establishing a healthy relationship. And I really struggled with the portrayal of mental illness beyond that.

Going on from here, there are some spoilers ahead, so be sure you want to read on please!

Nolan's illness and everything that's coming with it feels a bit too cliché. Benji's threat to jump with him if he jumps could have been straight out of some movie, Nolan having absolutely no problem with going to therapy and just accepts it, he's suddenly basically cured through seeing a therapist ONCE and having Benji - no human is the cure for a mental illness, people unal!ve themselves also in happy relationships and while they're in therapy, it is a super serious illness, and I think this book didn't give this seriousness justice. Also - someone who's just come back from their first therapy appointment, a very short time period after threatening to jump off a balcony and says he wants to take a nap alone, is no one I'd happily leave alone, but Benji doesn't even blink or check on him once, he just leaves the house for multiple hours.
Nolan is fully functioning with one bad day in two months after starting therapy and taking meds and that's just not realistic. I know it is a romance and it doesn't have to be realistic, but I think portraying mental illnesses needs at least some realism. And Maya worked so much with time jumps throughout the beginning of the book, I don't know why she didn't use time jumps for Nolan's therapy journey. Chapter 14 for example starts with "So, therapy sucks" but it also happens in January 2028, the same month as the chapter before - here a time jump would have been so suiting? Nolan even talks about "how sick my brain was until that fateful day on the balcony" in the same chapter - like his brain was fixed by now, after not even a month in therapy. And I know his major trigger with being on tour was gone and that's super important for a healing journey, but removing a burnout trigger won't cure the burnout and also won't be leading to feeling super good instantly. It all takes time, and not just some months or even weeks, unfortunately. And what really made me a bit mad was Nolan asking Benji if he ever has bad days on a day Nolan couldn't leave the bed - and Benji answers with "You'll have good days and bad days. Life." and then giving advice how you go hiking or work out on your bad days to get out of the negative headspace just isn't something that's suiting if the person you're saying that to has been in therapy for a month and has a mental illness. Bad days coming with mental illnesses are just SO different than bad days mentally healthy people have. This almost smells like gaslighting and I actually think that's dangerous for mentally ill people who don't have a supporting network yet and reading this. I know that's harsh and I feel super bad because I know how heavily Maya takes criticism, so Maya, in case you've read this: I still love you and your writing and I will continue to read anything you wrote!

Also another minor point of criticism: Benji bottoming/them switching roles and Benji thinking they probably won't switch often in the future (so he obviously doesn't love it), but for now it's the closeness he craves and it feels important to have done that kinda feeds the image a lot of queer male reviewers often criticise when it comes to women or non-males writing MM - that image of penetration being needed and especially the other way around than they normally do it, to show how close they are or how deep their love is, and I think that's super dangerous. But I'm not a queer man, so I'd rather let them speak for themselves, it just rubbed me the wrong way.

Regarding the rushing, the HEA also felt suuuper fast. They arrived in Clay Springs in January 2028, Nolan started therapy and in March 2028 they hired constructors to build their home. It just felt super weird.

So all in all, I had my struggles with this book, but it's by far not a bad book. It being this rushed (and it also comes out barely three months after the previous book was released and Maya not continuing this series despite having planned one more book) despite the heavy topics might just be a hint that this also wasn't super easy to write and having it now finished, maybe another series or a standalone will give Maya the freedom to write what she wants again.

So would I recommend it? If you've read and loved the rest of the series for sure (maybe even if you're like me and adored the first two books and had some struggles with the third), but don't read it as a standalone and don't start the series for this and have high expectations - still read the series tho because the first two books are among my favourite hurt/comfort books. And also please don't read it if you struggle with a mental illness and are not super stable. There are better mental illness rep books that show the ongoing fight better and still have a happy ending.

I received an ARC, thanks to GRR

[amber. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Maya always surprises me with what she writes next. Nolan and Benji are no different.

While these two are different from the other books in the series, they are the same in the sense that you can feel their love for eachother and how they care for eachother despite everything else.

Benji did everything he could to make sure Nolan was safe. Safe from the world, his fans, his band and label and most importantly himself. Nolan the sad boy he is, let Benji take care of him and love him😭😭😭
despite all the love Benji had for Nolan, I enjoyed that it wasn’t the “cure” Nolan needed, just that extra push to get help. Even though this was a heavy book, I think Maya handled the topics really well.

And of course it was always fun to see the other boys 🥹

Please be aware of the trigger warnings!!

[Laura Lou · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Long Refrain is book four in the Sweet Southern series. This MM romance story is about Benji and Nolan.

We met Benji in the previous books in this series. He is an escort and the sunshine, golden retriever type that always takes care of others. Benji gets contracted with Nolan as a client, and he is hesitant because the dynamic would be something he isn’t used to. Nolan is a famous rockstar. He also is a lost and broken man, struggling to survive.

Benji goes through with the contract with Nolan, and I don’t think either of them expected to feel the way they did about each other. When it came time for Nolan to go on his eight month world tour, he made the decision to contract with Benji for the entirety of it. Performing in arenas and stadiums gave Nolan such anxiety and depression, and it was tough to see everything he went through. Benji took care of Nolan and was always there for him. Gosh did my heart break for Nolan. He was brave to accept professional help and get the healing he needed. And Benji’s love and support throughout it was everything.

When Benji and Nolan went to Clay Springs, it was amazing to see Benji’s close friends Eli, Trevor and Jackson. I loved getting more of them and their boyfriends, especially Harper. Their found family was incredible, and I love how supportive they were and how they all accepted Nolan.

This was such an emotional story. There were so many moments that had me choked up and in tears. It made my heart happy when Nolan let Benji in, and that Benji was able to show Nolan he was worth loving. Nolan and Benji belonged together and I loved the beautiful ending to their love story.

I received an advanced copy of this book, and this is my honest review.

[Michele (_LivesBtweenPgs_) · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Life can come from something decaying if you only let it.”

Wow.
I am speechless.
When I knew this was going to be Nolan & Benji, I knew it was going to be a rough road and was it ever but in the end I was left smiling.
The huge topic in this one is heartbreaking and hit close to home.
I was not sure how it was going to play out or how it would be broached but Maya did a fantastic job in detail how one copes with the struggle.
We all suffer in our own silence in different ways, Nolan found his and latched onto it for a long time.
Until Benji.
Nolan broke my heart so much just in his POV, his struggles while painful were full of truth and honesty. How do you come back from the pain that you hide and the wanting to not exist anymore?
Benji is the type of person we all want in our life that is the light in our darkness, he is the saving grace that comes for Nolan. Realizing someone's struggles and choosing to stay is the biggest step someone can make. Benji realizes he would do anything for the surly rockstar because at the end of the day and deep down he sees Nolan for who he really is.

This was a fantastic while emotional and painful for me to read, I am glad that I got Nolan & Benji's story. Finding what they do is always the happy we want and at the end of the day we who suffer like Nolan just want someone who stays and is our Benji.

Please check the triggers before starting this book, please.

[Ditte]

A good ending to the Sweet Southern series. It wasnt the easiest read because of the heavy subject matter and certain things hitting bit close to home, but that's likely a personal issue.

Benji and Nolan had a very intense relationship, largely due to Nolan's deep depression. They were great together and I'm glad Nolan had Benji to support him and urge him to get help.

I really enjoyed seeing the other characters from the past three books - Harper especially. His and Nolan's friendship was great!

I read an ARC of The Long Refrain. Thank you to the author and Gay Romance Reviews

[Jenni · Rating 5 out of 5]

Maya Jean does it again! I genuinely don’t even know how to explain how much I absolutely adored this book and Nolan & Benji! We got to see peeks of them throughout this series and this was one of my most anticipated couples and it did not disappoint!

Benji is part of the fake boyfriend experience, so we’ve met him throughout the series, in the found family of all the fake boyfriends. He’s always intrigued me, and since Trevor’s story and how we see Benji take over the contract with Nolan, I’ve been interested even more so. In Jackson’s story we see that contract continue, and it all rounds out in Benji’s story.

I love interconnected standalones and Maya Jean does these SO well! We get to see the characters throughout these years as they all overlap in some sort of way, and it’s just absolutely beautiful to see and really get to know these two families merging into one through their loves.

This book was so raw and real and I sobbed so many times I lost count. It brought out real emotions and growth and love. I cried sad tears and happy tears and “I know how this feels” tears, and I’m so glad I was able to read such a range of emotions.

Their love story is hard fought but so damn beautiful. The emotions are so strong entirely. This book deals with sensitive topics in a way that somehow doesn’t weigh it down.

A story of sadness, of hope, of growing, of healing, of love, this was such a beautiful story!

[areadsbooks · Rating 5 out of 5]

review to come but omg. literal perfection. nolan and benji, just wow. maya, you forever floor me with how truly inspiring you make these characters. this was beyond anything i expected. all the stars, infinity stars.

arc review:


the long refrain has quite literally stole my heart. the emotional turmoil i am now facing bc of these two beautiful and precious souls, i struggle to find the words to how i want to write this review. so whatever is written here, don’t judge i am in my feels.

benji is an escort who we have met in the previous books in the series, he is handsome, charming, a total sweetheart who cares deeply for the people he holds dear. we hear of nolan, a client who has very particular tastes and is a slightly difficult and frosty regular to the escorting service that our boys work for.

due to nolans regular escort, trevor finding love in clay springs, benji is offered up the position in his place which he takes. from their first interaction, i was hooked. these two and their push-pull connection and the interesting dynamic that even nolan was surprised at, he found everything he never knew he wanted nor needed.

i ate this up, seriously. within a day this story was devoured and i feel a huge sense of sadness now bc they were exceptionally special. the care taking and hurt-comfort in this was beyond anything i had expected, they were absolute perfection. benji and nolan navigating their way through a system that worked for both of them without having to compromise too much of themselves was beautiful. nolan feeling seen for once, not just the rockstar, the performer, the musician, the neglected child, just nolan. a person who no one ever really knew, not even himself. urgh my heart hurts for this beautiful, damaged and broken man.

some moments within this story actually hurt to read, some really heartbreaking scenes that make you feel everything but then as maya always does, she knows exactly how to put you back together again and that’s exactly what happened when benji and nolan make their way to clay springs. the place that everyone needs in their life.

“𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘚𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦?”

“𝘔𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘤. 𝘓𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶.”

my heart began to feel so full, having cameos and scenes with the most precious men i have ever read about, clay springs is somewhere i truly wish was a real destination bc I swear to god, my heart is right there with them all. With eli + colby, beau + trev and my boy jackson and my favourite sweetheart spicy red-haired angel, harper. he and nolan are the friendship that i will think of forever. the found family just cements my absolute love for this story and series.

“𝘚𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘪𝘻𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘴,” 𝘐 𝘮𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨.

“𝘚𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯,” 𝘏𝘢𝘳𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘵𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬.
𝘖𝘩, 𝘩𝘦’𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥.

it makes me feel so fucking happy to know they are instant besties and will now have each other’s back when the dark days feel too dark to do alone.

i just love this story, every damn thing about it. top read of the month, I may even say of the year so far. raw, real, emotional, beautifully inspiring and i stand by my words that maya jean never fails to produce the most memorable stories. literal perfection.

infinity stars <3

[Tare · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is my favorite in the Sweet Southern series (I mean are we surprised considering it is by far the angstiest?).

Benji and Nolan stole my heart. This is rock star/hired sex worker. Nolan is about to embark on a world tour and the prospect of doing so without the support of someone to get him out of his head regularly (through rough sex) was insurmountable. So he hires Benji to tag along for months on end. The hurt/comfort here 👌. Nolan broke my heart - his depression was HEAVY. But Benji was able to see him, really see him, and give him what he so desperately needed. Watching him become protective AF over this prickly, troubled rock star?! Yes. I loved the caretaking (honestly I can never have enough of one MC ensuring the other MC is eating and taking care of themselves). And when he ensured that they had scheduled “date days” in the various cities they toured. Ughhhhh 😍

TW’s for suicidal ideation and an on-page suicide attempt (not graphic). This scene had me literally sobbing because it was equally heartbreaking and so beautiful.

Benji fought to help Nolan realize he is worthy of so much more than he thinks. He deserves love and he deserves to live a life filled with joy. The road to Nolan’s happiness was not/will not be easy but Benji will be there for him every step of the way.

The second part of the book felt so hopeful with Nolan getting therapy, medication and learning who he is and what he wants to do with his life now that he has committed to being alive. Seeing him make friends in Clay Springs (especially with Harper) and carve a space where he can live a quiet life was so beautiful.

[Lady Macbeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 stars
A couple of necessary clarifications:
Like clearly listed in the TWs at the start of the book, this story contains suicidal ideation and on page suicidal attempt (not graphic): if these topics trigger you, don't read this. If you still decide to read this, it's highly unfair to the author to rate this story low because of them.
Moreover, mental illnesses, coping mechanism and healing are a personal journey. You don't get to label the author's choices as not credible just because they don't match your own experiences.

This was the hardest story of the series, but also the most beautiful (sorry Beau and Trevor!).
Nolan and Benji's is a journey towards love for themselves, for each other, for their friends. It's a journey of healing, for both of them, even if in very different ways.
Nolan didn't have an easy childhood and teenage years, he wasn't able handle his huge success, he tried to cope with alcohol first and rough sex later, he had depression and suicidal thought. He's very talented but also so very lost.
Benji is easygoing and extroverted, he's friendly and caring, but he's also scared to lose the people he loves, because of a trauma in his past.
When they met each other, they have an instant connection, even if neither of them recognised it, they're like 2 pieces of a puzzle that fit perfectly.
Benji wants to erase all the pain from Nolan's life and finds a way to give him what he needs without hurting him, while Nolan feels like he can lean on Benji, he can open up to him, very slowly and with a lot of difficulty, but still he let Benji see the real him. With Benji, finally Nolan can feels safe.

The scene at the hotel is heartbreaking, highly emotional, painful, but also so very beautifully written: Beni and Nolan's feelings are intense and raw and all the situation made me cry ugly tears.

I really loved that, even when Nolan started therapy, he still had bad days and a lot of doubts, like it wasn't all suddenly resolved, like Benji's love wasn't the solutions to all his problems, but that he had to work hard to get better. Their HEA doesn't come out of the blue, neither their love declaration: when they finally say their I love yous, it's exactly the right time.

I also adored how supportive all the guys were: obviously, they were concerned about Benji, when he was on tour, but the moment they met Nolan, they took him under their wings and helped him getting the help he needed. They also offered something Nolan never had, a real friendship, with down to earth people who didn't care about fame or money (I really adored Nolan and Harper's relationship, Nolan was carefree with him).
Chris is worth mentioning too, he acted like a guardian angel over Nolan since he started working for him.

The series ends with this book, we don't know if Maya Jean will bring us back to Clay Springs again in the future. I'm sad but I'm also very curious to read what she'll write next. I hope we'll have a new story soon.

Highly recommended

[Danielle Piper · Rating 5 out of 5]

Only him. Only ever Benji. My thunder.

Benji, the last escort standing. While all his 3 best friends/brothers started finding their happily ever afters, it left Benji alone. Since he’s the only one left he’s contracted to one of the more difficult clients. How bad could a well known rockstar really be, okay so he may bite but Benji can bite right back. But when he finally comes face to face with the rock god Nolan Hastings he see’s behind the mask. He has to save Nolan, he has to keep him safe at all cost, not from the world but from Nolan himself.

Nolan each day is harder than the last, his music is no longer his. The rockstar mask is shining bright but the soul behind it is fading faster and faster. The only way to silence the noise is sëx, rough, untamed, unromantic. That is until his newest escort, one he’s never met turns around with eyes that could drown him. Benji White is like any man he’s ever seen, or been with. But he must fight these feelings, keep them as far away as possible. Something about Benji’s mere presence calms him in a ways he’s never felt, with a world tour coming up Benji may be his only hope to make it through.

Plot: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️

Maya has absolutely hands down outdone herself with this deep, beautiful, moving book! The amount of highlights, tears, gasp, I had during this book, just absolute amazing. Benji and Nolan surprised me with their dynamic, in a good way of course in previous book I did not see them being how they were in this book but again in the best way! They are each other’s saviors, Benji needs Nolan to find his place, and Nolan needs Benji to keep his heart beating. Beautifully written please never stop writing. Your words are powerful, your writing is meaningful, and it’s healing to some.

[Showarst · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow…


Maya Jean’s Sweet Southern series has been such an enjoyable one. Each book just seemed to get better and better. Colby and Eli, Beau and Trevor, Jackson and Harper, and now Benji and Nolan. I love how each couple has a different dynamic. We’ve seen hints of glimpses and heard about Nolan’s particular kinks. However, seeing how these two came togehter was just everything.

Nolan is in pain. He is a famous rockstar who loves music but hates performing. After a traumatic childhood, it’s just one more thing for him to push through. He has an outlet with the Fake Boyfriends, but is known to be rough. Benji is sunshine (literally) and is drawn to Nolan from the first moment. It was masterful to watch Benji break down Nolan’s walls and love him for who he was. I laughed with them and cried such tears when Nolan had his breakdown. Through it all, Benji was there by his side. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt ILYs as strongly as when these two said them.

This book is very heavy at times and I appreciated how Maya was able to temper the heaviness with some moments of lightness (Harper, I’m looking at you). I would definitely heed the TWs because they are needed here. I know that in the author’s note Maya said she could not write Joey and Lee’s story at this moment. Completely understandable. I’m sure this one took a lot of emotional currency. I will look forward to the moment that do get to see them come together.

I look forward to reading whatever Maya writes next. She has some a beautiful way of writing love stories that I truly believe.

I received an ARC from GRR for my honest review

[Julia Toth · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was very excited for Benji and Nolan's story, and I absolutely loved it. It's heartbreaking at times and it made me cry, but it also gives you hope. I loved the whole black cat/golden retriever thing they had going on. We've heard of Nolan in past books, so it was interesting to finally see him and figure him out. He was struggling with everything and it was heartbreaking to see. I loved that Benji saw him from the start and tried very hard to give him what he needed without asking. Benji is such a natural caretaker. I loved how he resisted doing things the way Nolan wanted while also giving Nolan what he needed in a more sweet and gentle way. Benji was exactly the person Nolan needed in his corner, the perfect person to rely on and the perfect person to love him the way he needed. It was great to see Benji help, but Nolan also had to fight his demons for himself, and it was great to see him fight and want to be there. I loved their chemistry and their banter a lot.
It was also great to be back in Clay Springs and see everyone again. The side characters were great and the found family is strong and a great help for both Benji and Nolan. Everyone really stepped up to be there for Nolan and Benji.
I really enjoyed the writing! It was lovely and poetic and just took you on a yourney.

This one is the heaviest of the books in this series, although all of them are emotional, this one deals with different topics. It's a book you want to read to experience the healing Nolan does and to witness the relationship blossom between him and Benji. I loved how stubborn Benji was about knowing what Nolan wanted and giving it to him in the best way possible.

Read this for the great black cat/golden retriever energy and if you like a troubled rockstar with the sunshine escort who change each others lives and find their HEA together.

I received a copy of this book from Gay Romance Reviews, and this is my honest review.

[Katkejt ☾. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Benji (Sunshine) • Nolan

….

“…and I feel beyond sure that I hold my entire universe…”

….

When starting a series I always have that someone special picked from the crowd and it was meant to be with Benji from the first time he appeared. With him we got Nolan and let me tell you, The Long Refrain is the most heartfelt and sensitive story of the whole series. Everybody needs a Benji in their life and Nolan is the sweetest surprise, a character that will always win me over 🖤.

There is something about a black cat that inside is everything that is good in the world, just care and listen to find out.

Love doesn’t heal everything but it can start a long road to something - it can be a simple word, form of affection that leads to healing, to acceptance, it can even save a life.

Mirror reflection ♾️.

One word to describe this story? Everlasting.

….

Halsey - Whispers

.

Sleep Token - Emergence

….

“He’s beautiful in a way that kind of hurts.” // “The noises in my head slowly quiet under his touch, until I can only hear the gentle inhale-exhale of his slow breathing.” // “…and a freckle sitting at the corner of his mouth stands out from the rest dotting his cheeks.” // “Azure.” // “Go swim some of your golden retriever out. I’ll watch.” // “He gets under my skin, making me do things I’d never once in my life considered doing. Some would call it danger, but the more I get to know him, the more I think maybe he’s just waking me up inside, after a long time asleep.” // “You always smell so good in the mornings…” // “I reach up to push the corner of his mouth up with my thumb. “Smile like this.””// “The shape of his hand feels like a brand, one that I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to forget.” // “I’m lightning and Benji is the thunder, the protective boom that follows my bright flash of light.” // “He tangles our fingers together and brings them to my chest, just over my heart.” // “I wish you were mine, just mine.” // “You know exactly what I need, stud. You always do.” // “I think he’ll lead me somewhere great.” // “You are now.” // “Always just us.” …

….

*I reviewed a complimentary copy of this book. All thoughts are my own.

….

[Betty Loves Books Galore · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an escort x rockstar to more romance, featuring Benji and Nolan, and is book four in the Sweet Southern series.

Please read the CW before jumping into this one.

Benji is hired by Nolan, a famous rockstar, as his escort while touring. Whilst it starts out as a rough play relationship, it doesn’t take long for Benji to understand what Nolan needs.

This is such an emotional read, and at one point I was crying my eyes out. I loved the cameos from the previous books in this series, and I forgot how much I loved Harper. I love this series and I highly recommend it.

Things to expect in this book are:
Book 4 in series
MM romance
Check CW
Some angst
Rockstar x Escort
Black cat x Golden retriever
Hurt / Comfort
Mental health themes
Spicy times & dirty talk
Rough play
CNC
Caretaking
Calls him Angel
Found family
Cameos from prev books
HEA

[Bess · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really, really enjoy Maya Jean's writing. This book is already filled with tropes that I like, so I went in thinking I'd enjoy it, and it paid off in every way. It's hard to write about depression and other sensitive topics, and Maya always does a great job. Plenty of authors use romantic relationships as a way to "fix" the depressed character, but here there's a much more realistic trajectory that feels authentic. The one caution I would give is that the depiction of depression is realistic, so you want to take care with yourself if that might be triggering for you. 4.5 stars, great read!

[Saskia Veldhuis · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars. A really painful story with beautifully written mental health struggles, including some very heavy scenes. Nolan was a rather off-putting character mentioned in one of the previous books, but it soon became very clear that he had good reason to be. Benji needed all his golden retriever powers to be able to support Nolan and discovered more about his place in the found family than he ever thought possible. A really well-deserved HEA.

[Liza Broadaway · Rating 4 out of 5]

These two were so beautiful. Nolan so weighted down by his life and sweet Benji who only wanted to help him bear the load or remove it completely. What was just supposed to be an escort/client relationship it became so much more when Benji was able to see the real Nolan and know what he needed! So so good!!

[Ana · Rating 4 out of 5]

4⭐️ 2.5🌶️

MM, Benji & Nolan, depression, angst

Check TW

The best of this series, so much pain, but worthy to see the downs and the healing process

“If you jump, I jump too. I can’t let you die alone. You’ve spent so much of your life alone. I…” A cry gets caught in my throat. “I can’t let you be alone in those last moments too.”