Admittedly, and I promise, it will make total sense when you read the title essay, the first draft of this review read:
“If eating dick were a national sport, I am pretty sure Adam Farrar’s family would compete against each other unblinkingly chewing down on his mother's sweet phallic love treats, broken or not, while discussing, if not world peace then the next best thing, the state of genitals and feelings, something Adam, as we learned in his first book Cold Fish Soup (if you haven't read it already, oh how I envy you), is perpetually in awe of. His own feelings primarily, but also, almost like an alien observing the human species, other people’s.”
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And although, I have a sneaking suspicion that the intended title for this book was Broken P3nises, and while having had a moment of acute adult-like thinking during a particularly frustrating attempt to curb a (nother) leak in the house that I repeatedly insist to Mr. Right, I love, if for nothing else then to show consistency and an unwavering belief that we can totally make this 1920ies house watertight - but also because, let’s be honest, it seems like a slippery slope to admit to Husband that he IS right after having spent 20 odd years trying to get him NOT to move house…
ANYHOO, despite the picture of Adam and his Mother munching broken p3nis biscuits while sorting out the world, it does seem a tad lazy, intellectually, to start a review of Broken Biscuits with that as a reference. AND that, despite the fact, that Mr Farrer uses the word P3nis a total of 48 times in the book. 38 times P3nis, nine times p3nises (! I have questions) and one time P3nisshaped. Pretty solid case for starting the review within the theme of genital mastication …
But
He also uses dick seven times, f0ck in some variation 64 times (I am mightily impressed and ever so slightly envious, I have been told I use it too much but I have not managed to squeeze it in 64 times in any of my novels… #GOALS), g4y twenty times. Love 57 times, beautiful 35 times and s3x 64 times, if he had added the extra five I would have been REALLY impressed. In any case, I will open a book on this novel being banned in several if not all states in the US and I personally think we should smuggle copies into schools and put them on shelves for all teens to read.
ANYWAY
All of the above, just to say - I think it is too predictable to start a review of this magnificent collection of essayistic memoirs latching on to the picture of genitals. Because, having read the book now three times, what I am left with, apart from a sore belly from laughing and a blocked nose from crying, is the overwhelming sense that here we have a person who is really truly and completely utterly committed to life. And god (no capital, sorry if that offends, but my god is not into that shxt) how he works hard for it. We learned in Cold Fish Soup (yes capitals) that suicidal ideation and overcoming that troublesome urge, is something Adam lives with and has been confronted by continuously all his life, not least by his Brother Robert who killed himself, but this book is not a lieder on death (28times) it is an ode to life - 78 times to be precise.
In Broken Biscuits, Adam takes us further back and deeper into his philosophical hive mind and dear readers, it is a beautiful place. A veritable Adam in Wonderland vibe at times, but also NOT. At all! This is not a tale. Nothing is absurd, not a cat in sight.
The book reads like a flamboyant yet perfectly balanced meal, not unlike the one his beautiful younger Brother Ben serves up for him in the chapter An Inside Job (one of my faves) It is savoury, yet sweet, a tasting menu of masculinities, human vulnerabilities and genuine introspection. There is no doubt that Mr Farrer is bloody hard on himself, to the point - just before the point - it becomes too painful to keep reading, and he changes course. Adam is a true admiral, not just captain, of his journey to self-awareness and identity and he seamlessly navigates the reader from the bay of tears across the sea of trauma to the coast of roaring laughter within the space of a few lines.
‘I blamed my genitals.[...] And because no problem has ever been solved by shouting at a p3nis, I decided it was high time that I sought professional help.’ (155)
Back to the p3nis theme. Because, part of the voyage is closely linked to the subtitle And Other Male Failures. What is it to be a man? To be manly? To be a sexual being who in a particularly enlightened chapter is so confused about these questions that he has to ask a friend if he has been sexually assaulted. Opening a very particular and important kettle of fish (soup) concerning the differences between female and male reasons for fear… AND sparking a brilliant take on what it is like to be a girl dad, girl mother, girl parent. But also what we should think about when we raise our sons. Tolerance, love, trust, fighting against toxic masculinities and wotnot. I say wotnot, but I do actually know a bit about this as I was a vice chair for a research network into Men and masculinities studies for close to 10 years. If you are interested, do read the wonderful Niels Ulrik Sørensen’s works on youth, learning, sexuality and pornography amongst other things. He is a brilliant writer and researcher and in my book a true poet. You can find quite a bit in English, but it is probably better if you learn Danish, shouldn’t take you long… since you have read this far, I know for a fact you are patient and of a curious nature, so it shouldn’t be a problem.
Adam Farrer is patient too, and of a curious nature, a bit gender curious one might call it and an altogether glorious raconteur. There are only a few things he seems to not be good at. He has an
‘Inability to stay down’ (p. 165) and according to his friend Zoe, his driving
‘I'm sorry,’ she said, ‘But this is so weird. It's like watching a dog riding a horse.’ (p. 200)
One could add, little things like: becoming a pro wrestler, having the body of Adonis and being boring. Because, trust me, at no point in this book will you be bored. And for a guy who decides early on to ‘Just say no’ to drugs and trouble (p. 253), not least because his burlesque dancing powerhouse of a mother said so, Adam doesn’t half say yes to a lot of things. OR, and this is entirely possible, I am just that much more mundane.
One thing is certain. Alan Bennett lovers - there is a new kid on the block, and he is not pulling punches. I can see him going places. We are talking, plays, musicals and nakedness in purple rain. Hopefully not Hollywood, they do not deserve him, but Hull Truck, West End and perhaps even the famous Cromer end of the Pier Show. NOW THAT would be something. Joking aside. … watch this space. Adam Farrer has proven that his first novel wasn’t a fluke. I see rainbow skies ahead.
Erna and I agree… this is five if not fat, then chunky whales from us
Go preorder it, get it while it is in hardback, and read it in public so people can see what a difference a book makes.
🐳 🐳🐳🐳🐳
#ernatheflyingwhale and
Sussi Louise Smith
And for the people of the North: The Grove Bookshop in Ilkley has a fabulous event with Adam on March 5th at 7 pm. Contact the shop for tickets.
Adam Farrer
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#brokenbiscuits