Pain of a Particular Kind: The Loss of a Child

by Peter Barnes

There are few things which any parent dreads more than the thought of outliving his or her child, or grandchild. The deaths of parents, friends, relatives and even one's spouse are terrible indeed, but the death of one's child possesses a peculiar kind of horror. In four brief chapters, Peter Barnes draws on his own experience to offer help to those who have suffered such a loss. As he says in the Introduction, 'This is not a work of apologetics, but a brief attempt to understand and work through grief, for myself, my family, and for any other readers. It has only heightened the sense of my own need to receive comfort myself. Such comfort can only come from the God who is our creator and our redeemer. The hope remains that God will use this book to minister to and bless any of his people who have suffered the agony of losing a child.'

Genres: Theology

88 pages, Paperback

Published November 13, 2024

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name. This entry is for the English playwright and screenwriter.

Reviews

[Elaine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Powerful, hope-infused and richly Biblical with many references to and quotes by revered believers from the past (and present) who’ve suffered loss in this way.

[Colin Fast · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pain of a Particular Kind: The Loss of a Child by Peter Barnes (Edinburgh: Bannerof Truth, 2024), 88pp.

Death and the loss of loved ones is hard no matter who it is that has gone on. There is a particular kind of pain, however, when a child precedes his or her parents in entering glory. While I haven’t lost a child of my own, I know many who have, including my parents. These are challenging times and events. It’s the sort of loss that one can never fully come to grasp and understand– each year, the wound being reopened upon the child’s birthday or the anniversary of the loss.

Peter Barnes’ newest book, Pain of a Particular Kind, wrestles through the uncomfortable reality of losing a child, or in Barnes’ case, losing a grandchild aged five to terminal cancer. Barnes wrestles with the biblical text, drawing hope in the character of God and the way Scripture speaks of those who have gone before us, and offers some helpful tips for how we can pastorally care for those who have felt such devastating loss.

A volume on a topic like this needs to be short – and this one fits the bill at 88 pages including from and back matter – in order for it to be useful as a resource to giveaway. While I would hesitate to give a book like this to my parents, I think it will be a helpful resource for pastors and family and friends of those who have lost loved ones, especially children.

For a more personal journal wrestling through the death of a child, look out for the short book of reflections from Heather So, daughter of Peter Barnes, with Christian Focus, The Suffering of a Child (forthcoming November 2025).

[Timothy Ebersole · Rating 4 out of 5]

Barnes expresses the pain of losing his young daughter, the non sinfulness of grief, and speaks of the hope found in Jesus' resurrection. Hope is not found by suppression of reality but by embracing what is real about this life and eternity as God has revealed it to be. The read is short, thought provoking and well worth giving it the time of day.

[Brad · Rating 5 out of 5]

I highly recommend! Very poignant and very helpful!

[Joonas Laajanen · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Raped by death."

"Without the Light of the world, the darkness is dark indeed."

"The moon is always round, and God is always good."

[Jan Beekman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent little book about the grief of losing a child.. Helpful.

[Heather Storey · Rating 5 out of 5]

So helpful. Practical. Theological. Weighty, but not burdening. Highly recommend.