What do you think?
紙の舟で眠る [Kami no Fune de Nemuru] #1
Sleeping on the Paper Ship, Vol. 1
1949, Yokohama. In un Giappone devastato dalla guerra, Kei Kitahara è uno sceneggiatore di successo ma, per una sorta di strana maledizione, le persone che ispirano le sue storie finiscono inevitabilmente per diventare vittime di sciagure. Per questo Kei decide di deporre la penna, che era la sua unica ragione di vita. Un giorno, l’incontro con un giovane e affascinante fotografo riaccende in lui il desiderio di scrivere...
Un’intrigante miniserie in due volumi da una delle autrici Boys’ Love più talentuose dell’attuale panorama nipponico!
Un’intrigante miniserie in due volumi da una delle autrici Boys’ Love più talentuose dell’attuale panorama nipponico!
248 pages, Paperback
First published December 27, 2023
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 145 reviews
September 30, 2025
I love me some tragic, troublesome bl. I’m interested if this will reach a deadly conclusion or if there’s hope for joy. Right now I’m thinking the former.
January 23, 2025
The emotional damage is real :)
August 10, 2026
Read my reviews for full manga duology here
June 16, 2026
Wasn’t really planning to write a review but now I must rtc
September 11, 2025
Yeah, I’m going to be thinking about this for a long time.
This in a way felt like it was written specifically for me because it had every element and themes I love in a book.
Cursed screenwriter Kei ends up leading all the people he bases his protagonists off of to death. Defeated, he decides to take a break from writing until he befriends an aspiring photographer, Yoichi. He reinspires Kei to pick up the pen again and together they form a connection becoming each other's muses. However, the curse continues to loom over Kei’s head.
It was so angsty with a doomed undertone. The emotions in this really jumped right off the page. I was constantly blown away by the character’s facial expressions. The second half of this felt like gut punch after gut punch.
The dialogue and writing was also just SO GOOD! My book journal spread for this is about to have a long list of quotes. Let’s just say the codependency really jumped out so of course I was like HELLO!
I can’t wait to see their fate in volume 2!
Thank you so much to SuBLime and VIZ Media for providing me with the eARC.
This in a way felt like it was written specifically for me because it had every element and themes I love in a book.
Cursed screenwriter Kei ends up leading all the people he bases his protagonists off of to death. Defeated, he decides to take a break from writing until he befriends an aspiring photographer, Yoichi. He reinspires Kei to pick up the pen again and together they form a connection becoming each other's muses. However, the curse continues to loom over Kei’s head.
It was so angsty with a doomed undertone. The emotions in this really jumped right off the page. I was constantly blown away by the character’s facial expressions. The second half of this felt like gut punch after gut punch.
The dialogue and writing was also just SO GOOD! My book journal spread for this is about to have a long list of quotes. Let’s just say the codependency really jumped out so of course I was like HELLO!
I can’t wait to see their fate in volume 2!
Thank you so much to SuBLime and VIZ Media for providing me with the eARC.
June 12, 2025
ชอบชื่อเรื่องภาษาไทย "นิทราบนนาวากระดาษ" แต่พล๊อตหม่นมาก เรื่องราวของตัวเอกนักเขียนบทภาพยนตร์ กับช่างภาพ ปมเยอะ อ่านแล้วหม่นไปกับตัวละครแต่งานภาพและลายเส้นสวยค่ะ
May 8, 2024
A complicated BL manga set in post-WW2 Japan, Sleeping on Paper Boats explores the complex relationship between Kei, a messy homme fatale and screenwriter, and his muse/savior/puppy Youichi, who Kei sees as the harbinger of death. The men share a fate that transcends the boundaries of ordinary human connection. This review is written after reading Act 3, and to my knowledge the story is still ongoing (follow along on Pixiv or your site of choice!)
After a mass-death incident in which Kei and Youichi are the only survivors, their perception of humanity is altered as they split and grow into adulthood. Kei, as if possessed by an otherworldly force, finds a talent for screenwriting. However, the models for his protagonists become cursed and die without fail.
Youichi, an amateur photographer living in a brothel, finds both artistic inspiration through Kei's films and an intrinsic purpose through being in his orbit. The two men forge an unbreakable yet unequal bond, and the reader is left with questions: are they merely human, or is there something more to their existence? What is Youichi hiding, and how much of Kei’s suspicion is a product of his own delusion?
Kei unwillingly embarks on his comeback film, a project that may either free him from the shinigami's curse and allow him to write as a “human” or consign him to oblivion, alongside his friend.
At parts, I feel like the beginning of the story was rushed. I’ve also found some parts confusing, but I am not a native Japanese reader. However, overall Yatsuda Teki nicely weaves elements of tragedy, romance, and the supernatural, keeping me incredibly engaged so far. At parts their dynamic reminds of Marukido Maki’s PORNOGRAPHER, which is one of my all-time favorite BL manga.
The cherry on top is the incredible character artwork. The perfect amount of detail is given to characters in panels (such as shinigami Youichi in Kei’s nightmares) to enhance the emotional depth and complexity of the characters and of Kei’s personal hell. It brings everything to life in a beautiful way.
If you like a good historical setting, supernatural elements, and complex character development/relationships, give this a shot. I’ll probably update this review as I keep reading.
EDIT: Got my hands on the completed physical volume! WOW, it gets even more intense :] final rating: 4.5/5
After a mass-death incident in which Kei and Youichi are the only survivors, their perception of humanity is altered as they split and grow into adulthood. Kei, as if possessed by an otherworldly force, finds a talent for screenwriting. However, the models for his protagonists become cursed and die without fail.
Youichi, an amateur photographer living in a brothel, finds both artistic inspiration through Kei's films and an intrinsic purpose through being in his orbit. The two men forge an unbreakable yet unequal bond, and the reader is left with questions: are they merely human, or is there something more to their existence? What is Youichi hiding, and how much of Kei’s suspicion is a product of his own delusion?
Kei unwillingly embarks on his comeback film, a project that may either free him from the shinigami's curse and allow him to write as a “human” or consign him to oblivion, alongside his friend.
At parts, I feel like the beginning of the story was rushed. I’ve also found some parts confusing, but I am not a native Japanese reader. However, overall Yatsuda Teki nicely weaves elements of tragedy, romance, and the supernatural, keeping me incredibly engaged so far. At parts their dynamic reminds of Marukido Maki’s PORNOGRAPHER, which is one of my all-time favorite BL manga.
The cherry on top is the incredible character artwork. The perfect amount of detail is given to characters in panels (such as shinigami Youichi in Kei’s nightmares) to enhance the emotional depth and complexity of the characters and of Kei’s personal hell. It brings everything to life in a beautiful way.
If you like a good historical setting, supernatural elements, and complex character development/relationships, give this a shot. I’ll probably update this review as I keep reading.
EDIT: Got my hands on the completed physical volume! WOW, it gets even more intense :] final rating: 4.5/5
October 18, 2025
I disliked
A Home Far Away
so much that I seriously debated whether to preorder this series. I like Sublime as a publisher, but I've been pretty disappointed lately by their small number of new licenses, and the titles they choose...
The only reason I kept my preorder was because I looked it up and confirmed that this has a happy ending. So that had better be true; I have some pretty strong trust issues after the absolute mess of their other angstfest, where the endless misery was entirely the point.
I get the sense that's just how this author operates - to them, wallowing in despair makes the story more...literary, maybe, or at least that's the attempt. While this one pulls off the navel-gazing a little bit better - possibly due to Sublime's superior translations - the overall story is kind of muddy and doesn't really make sense.
It's incredibly unclear whether the two main characters are simply massively depressed, edging heavily into constant suicidal territory, or if there really is some sort of supernatural element to it.
They're the sole survivors of a tram wreck from their childhood, when an army truck crashed into the tram and killed everyone else on board, including a number of kids who were on their way home from school, and Yoichi's mother, who'd shielded him with her own body.
Kei honestly seems to have had a pretty decent life after that. His family isn't mentioned, but he'd been on the tram by himself, so he seems to have been raised by his family in a pretty normal way once he recovered from his injuries, and by age 19 he was selling screenplays and becoming an overnight sensation. But he was constantly miserable, with "Death" haunting his steps.
Here's where it seems like it's a supernatural story, because there's this whole poison pen element, where every time he writes a screenplay, the real life counterpart of the main character dies in some abrupt and seemingly unnatural way. Kei also has constant hallucinations of a child who looks like him, whom he'd first seen in the wreckage of the crash, whom he's determined is Death, giving him his words and taking lives as punishment.
So Kei decides to stop writing and puts his pen down for three years, trying to use alcohol and other terrible choices to drown out the voice in his head that still wants to create words.
This could all be very interesting, but it mostly comes across as just some sort of torture kink. He doesn't seem to be doing anything to fix the problem...like, say, therapy. Or maybe writing stories that aren't ripoffs of other people's lives? If you don't thinly veil a real person in your narrative, then there's no real life person who would die?
When he meets Yoichi, he basically replaces Death as his muse, and Kei clings to him as someone who can free him to write again. So he writes another screenplay, which of course is hugely successful, like everything he does (this all seems unrealistic too), but then the producer mentor who'd jumpstarted his career insists that he write a screenplay about himself next - the screenwriter whose pen kills people. He basically threatens Yoichi and his dreams of a photography career to get Kei to do it.
So Kei breaks up with Yoichi without explaining why, and they both sink back into angry misery again.
Mixed in here is a lot of weirdness with Yoichi starting to violently choke Kei every time they have sex, with Kei's neck constantly covered in visible dark bruises as a result. And some more of the "supernatural" oddness with them having the same dreams at the same time, and Yoichi saying dialogue or living through scenes that Kei has only just thought of in his head, or started to put down on paper.
I kind of don't get the sense that there's going to be a real answer about whether any of this is actually happening, or if Kei's kind of going crazy or something? He does close out this volume by finally telling Yoichi he's in love with him, and that he doesn't want to die and leave him, which is a start.
But Yoichi is possibly even more messed up than Kei is...after his mother's death, whom I think was a post-war prostitute, he gets taken in by the other women at the brothel, and spends his entire life living there and working for them as a handyman, etc. He also gets his virginity taken by one of the women when he's still pretty young - and she tells him in the process that the only way he'll ever get anyone to love him is to remain an empty shell so people can project whatever they want onto him.
He has a pretty major breakdown after he loses Kei, because even being an empty shell for him didn't work. I guess it's meant to be progress that he shows some true emotion and some of the anger that's actually being boiling underneath all this time.
But to me, the overall story just...feels kind of equally empty. I liked it okay after I finished reading it last night, but as I'm thinking through it more in the light of day, it really does feel like that same "misery is beautiful and life is pointless and terrible" message from that one-shot I hated. I just have to decide if I'm interested enough to read the conclusion in the second volume...and right now, I'm kind of not? I don't even like either of the characters that much.
There is a whole deeper meaning to this story, with the post-war disillusionment and economic/creative devastation that took a long time to rebuild. But if you're looking for something that explores those kinds of topics, I'd recommend I Can't Get Through the Night Alone instead.
The only reason I kept my preorder was because I looked it up and confirmed that this has a happy ending. So that had better be true; I have some pretty strong trust issues after the absolute mess of their other angstfest, where the endless misery was entirely the point.
I get the sense that's just how this author operates - to them, wallowing in despair makes the story more...literary, maybe, or at least that's the attempt. While this one pulls off the navel-gazing a little bit better - possibly due to Sublime's superior translations - the overall story is kind of muddy and doesn't really make sense.
It's incredibly unclear whether the two main characters are simply massively depressed, edging heavily into constant suicidal territory, or if there really is some sort of supernatural element to it.
They're the sole survivors of a tram wreck from their childhood, when an army truck crashed into the tram and killed everyone else on board, including a number of kids who were on their way home from school, and Yoichi's mother, who'd shielded him with her own body.
Kei honestly seems to have had a pretty decent life after that. His family isn't mentioned, but he'd been on the tram by himself, so he seems to have been raised by his family in a pretty normal way once he recovered from his injuries, and by age 19 he was selling screenplays and becoming an overnight sensation. But he was constantly miserable, with "Death" haunting his steps.
Here's where it seems like it's a supernatural story, because there's this whole poison pen element, where every time he writes a screenplay, the real life counterpart of the main character dies in some abrupt and seemingly unnatural way. Kei also has constant hallucinations of a child who looks like him, whom he'd first seen in the wreckage of the crash, whom he's determined is Death, giving him his words and taking lives as punishment.
So Kei decides to stop writing and puts his pen down for three years, trying to use alcohol and other terrible choices to drown out the voice in his head that still wants to create words.
This could all be very interesting, but it mostly comes across as just some sort of torture kink. He doesn't seem to be doing anything to fix the problem...like, say, therapy. Or maybe writing stories that aren't ripoffs of other people's lives? If you don't thinly veil a real person in your narrative, then there's no real life person who would die?
When he meets Yoichi, he basically replaces Death as his muse, and Kei clings to him as someone who can free him to write again. So he writes another screenplay, which of course is hugely successful, like everything he does (this all seems unrealistic too), but then the producer mentor who'd jumpstarted his career insists that he write a screenplay about himself next - the screenwriter whose pen kills people. He basically threatens Yoichi and his dreams of a photography career to get Kei to do it.
So Kei breaks up with Yoichi without explaining why, and they both sink back into angry misery again.
Mixed in here is a lot of weirdness with Yoichi starting to violently choke Kei every time they have sex, with Kei's neck constantly covered in visible dark bruises as a result. And some more of the "supernatural" oddness with them having the same dreams at the same time, and Yoichi saying dialogue or living through scenes that Kei has only just thought of in his head, or started to put down on paper.
I kind of don't get the sense that there's going to be a real answer about whether any of this is actually happening, or if Kei's kind of going crazy or something? He does close out this volume by finally telling Yoichi he's in love with him, and that he doesn't want to die and leave him, which is a start.
But Yoichi is possibly even more messed up than Kei is...after his mother's death, whom I think was a post-war prostitute, he gets taken in by the other women at the brothel, and spends his entire life living there and working for them as a handyman, etc. He also gets his virginity taken by one of the women when he's still pretty young - and she tells him in the process that the only way he'll ever get anyone to love him is to remain an empty shell so people can project whatever they want onto him.
He has a pretty major breakdown after he loses Kei, because even being an empty shell for him didn't work. I guess it's meant to be progress that he shows some true emotion and some of the anger that's actually being boiling underneath all this time.
But to me, the overall story just...feels kind of equally empty. I liked it okay after I finished reading it last night, but as I'm thinking through it more in the light of day, it really does feel like that same "misery is beautiful and life is pointless and terrible" message from that one-shot I hated. I just have to decide if I'm interested enough to read the conclusion in the second volume...and right now, I'm kind of not? I don't even like either of the characters that much.
There is a whole deeper meaning to this story, with the post-war disillusionment and economic/creative devastation that took a long time to rebuild. But if you're looking for something that explores those kinds of topics, I'd recommend I Can't Get Through the Night Alone instead.
August 23, 2026
This book was something i would call beautifully depressing. The plot had multiple twists that were both simple and noticeable and unexpected. I have i feeling this story was completely doomed from the very start, knowing the dynamics and the overall relationship between them.
Not only was this story just beautifully written but the connection to the title of the book through to the words was breathtaking. The imagery, metaphors and similes just kept drawing me in and it truly made this story magnificent. Although some parts of this book definitely confused me i needed to keep reading to understand where all this information was headed. Not only did the slow story slowly take shape but it make certain twists way more impactful. I cannot wait to read volume 2 cause I have a feeling its either gonna go really well or I was right and it was all doomed right from the beginning.
I mean you gotta love doomed yaoi right...
Not only was this story just beautifully written but the connection to the title of the book through to the words was breathtaking. The imagery, metaphors and similes just kept drawing me in and it truly made this story magnificent. Although some parts of this book definitely confused me i needed to keep reading to understand where all this information was headed. Not only did the slow story slowly take shape but it make certain twists way more impactful. I cannot wait to read volume 2 cause I have a feeling its either gonna go really well or I was right and it was all doomed right from the beginning.
I mean you gotta love doomed yaoi right...
July 21, 2026
The panels are literally works of art, I feel blessed. The story is very interesting, even tho I'm not sure I've really grasped how the plot unfolds.
March 2, 2026
Disappointing. I love a good psychological horror BL, but this series does not deliver. It's desperate to impress yet lacks depth. The romance is unconvincing, not to mention the dialogue is stilted. Also, I kept getting distracted by all the 3D assets. I've read my fair share of manhwa so seeing 3D assets isn't anything new, but I've never seen them used to this extent, to the point where it jolts me out of the story.
March 16, 2025
4,5/5
Ho preso questo volume (e il seguente della duologia) solo al sentire il nome dell'autrice, la stessa di home far away, e non ho avuto nessun dubbio sul fatto che sarebbe riuscita a tirare fuori qualcosa di fenomenale.
Premessa: penso che il suo esordio sia un filino migliore di questa opera per via di un solo e specifico punto narrativo che mi ha fatto storcere il naso, per il resto chef's kiss.
Mi piace un sacco come lei scelga un tema principale e utilizzi la storia attorno per sviscerarlo: che sia il trauma religioso (home far away, che essendo nata in una famiglia italiana colpisce particolarmente vicino) o l'ossessione fino al punto di morte (quest'opera) lei riesce a dargli una svolta più che interessante attraverso le voci dei protagonisti, entrambi posseduti da demoni diversi che li portano non solo a distruggersi a vicenda, ma anche a produrre le loro opere, rinchiudendoli in questo circolo vizioso senza fine. Arrivi a pensare che forse quello che stai leggendo sia solo nella testa del protagonista perché così calato nella sua ossessione/possessione sembra non capire più cosa sia la realtà e cosa la fantasia.
Questo volume descrive quella parte della storia egregiamente. (non voglio fare spoiler)
Poi arriva il secondo volume, dove per me c'è il nodo principale del problema nel quale la scrittrice stessa si è ingarbugliata- (scrivo nel prossimo volume)
Ho preso questo volume (e il seguente della duologia) solo al sentire il nome dell'autrice, la stessa di home far away, e non ho avuto nessun dubbio sul fatto che sarebbe riuscita a tirare fuori qualcosa di fenomenale.
Premessa: penso che il suo esordio sia un filino migliore di questa opera per via di un solo e specifico punto narrativo che mi ha fatto storcere il naso, per il resto chef's kiss.
Mi piace un sacco come lei scelga un tema principale e utilizzi la storia attorno per sviscerarlo: che sia il trauma religioso (home far away, che essendo nata in una famiglia italiana colpisce particolarmente vicino) o l'ossessione fino al punto di morte (quest'opera) lei riesce a dargli una svolta più che interessante attraverso le voci dei protagonisti, entrambi posseduti da demoni diversi che li portano non solo a distruggersi a vicenda, ma anche a produrre le loro opere, rinchiudendoli in questo circolo vizioso senza fine. Arrivi a pensare che forse quello che stai leggendo sia solo nella testa del protagonista perché così calato nella sua ossessione/possessione sembra non capire più cosa sia la realtà e cosa la fantasia.
Questo volume descrive quella parte della storia egregiamente. (non voglio fare spoiler)
Poi arriva il secondo volume, dove per me c'è il nodo principale del problema nel quale la scrittrice stessa si è ingarbugliata- (scrivo nel prossimo volume)
February 3, 2026
Great art, really stunning. As for the rest... it lost me somewhere in the middle. I'm fine with dark, twisted stories, and I liked the creepy vibes here. But at some point, it crossed into depression and suicide galore, clearly trying to appear deeper than it actually is, in this emo quasi-literary style that I'd totally fall for as a teenager... but I just roll my eyes at it now.
Some of the other reviewers used the word "empty" to describe this manga, and after some thought, that's probably the word I'd use too - because despite an interesting premise and hauntingly beautiful panels, the story isn't terribly original so far, and the parts that at first appear intriguing, on second thought turn out to be there mostly for the shock value. The characters, too, seem like empty shells, just disappearing from my mind as soon as I move my eyes away from the panels. Perhaps all that was the mangaka's intent, but it's just not working for me.
Some of the other reviewers used the word "empty" to describe this manga, and after some thought, that's probably the word I'd use too - because despite an interesting premise and hauntingly beautiful panels, the story isn't terribly original so far, and the parts that at first appear intriguing, on second thought turn out to be there mostly for the shock value. The characters, too, seem like empty shells, just disappearing from my mind as soon as I move my eyes away from the panels. Perhaps all that was the mangaka's intent, but it's just not working for me.
June 20, 2025
WHEN THE MLM IT’S NOT MAN LEAVING MAN😍😍😍
November 24, 2025
MY FRAGILE AND DELICATE HEART 😭🫶🏽
May 7, 2026
El dibujo me gusta, la historia otro BL más entre lo chungo malrollero y el sexo CNC.
No es mi rollo.
No es mi rollo.
February 15, 2025
*Original Review 2/14/2025*
Honestly a little confused by what the hell is going on, but I really enjoy this author's writing and art style. They do emotional tragic bl so well. I have no clue what to expect from the ending, but I am expecting it to hurt.
*Reread 10/14/2025*
Still pretty confused, but I feel like this whole thing is meant to be a metaphor for ptsd and trauma. Maybe once I read the second volume it'll all come together for me. I'm not really expecting a happy ending considering the other bl I've read by this author, but I'm looking forward to the conclusion.
Honestly a little confused by what the hell is going on, but I really enjoy this author's writing and art style. They do emotional tragic bl so well. I have no clue what to expect from the ending, but I am expecting it to hurt.
*Reread 10/14/2025*
Still pretty confused, but I feel like this whole thing is meant to be a metaphor for ptsd and trauma. Maybe once I read the second volume it'll all come together for me. I'm not really expecting a happy ending considering the other bl I've read by this author, but I'm looking forward to the conclusion.
August 10, 2026
”Please look at me. Kei… I want to become your film.”
★ ★ ★ ★ ★
TW: suicide ideation, abuse, domestic violence, explicit sexual content, childhood trauma, death, grief, and alcoholism/substance abuse
Sleeping on Paper Boats is a haunting, historical bl story set in post-WW2 Japan, where we follow Kei Kitahara. Kitahara, as a child, was one of two survivors of a horrible train accident, and as he grew, his survivor’s guilt unknowingly manifested in maddening ways. He would see visions and figments of his childhood self, that he calls “Death”, almost a what if of if he’d died that day. To block out the things Death tells him and to expel these constant, agonizing words in his mind, he writes. He excels in screenwriting at a very young age, taking Japan by storm. However, the muses he inspires his works off of begin to meet sudden ends, and he realizes he must have some sort of curse. He swears to put his pen down and isolates himself in bar hopping and a reckless life in general. One day, he is saved and aided by Yoichi, the other boy who survived on the train that day many years ago. As they spend time together, Kitahara grows enamored with Yoichi, and he can’t help but begin fighting the desire to make Yoichi his next muse.
My thoughts
This was incredible. Kei is a beautifully tragic character who always seems to fall into deeper despair, no matter how hard he tries to simply end the suffering he brings on others. I will admit, as somebody who has struggled with suicide ideation myself, and still fights it, this was a tough read — but one that really executed the difficulty of even having a will to live really well.
One thing I found particularly relatable was the way Kei described writing as releasing all the words in his head that demanded to be said. I’ve always thought of my brain as an entire world trapped inside one person, since writing can sometimes feel physically painful because of how much is in my head that I simply can’t explain on paper, but I feel like I need to or else I can’t function. It was really refreshing and nice to see.
Yoichi was a terrifying and extremely well-written character. Since we don’t see the story from his perspective like we do Kei, we have to carefully watch and analyze things he says and what he does to understand his survivor’s guilt from the accident. However, when I did understand, I was taken away by how well the author portrayed it.
My one complaint was that the story was a tad hard to follow at times. Specifically some of the plot twists, although when I looked back on it in the middle of writing this, there were a lot of signs leading up to Yoichi’s plot twist.
This wasn’t something that ruined the story for me at all, though. I personally like when stories have a lot of depth that takes analysis to understand. I know that’s not everybody’s cup of tea, but it certainly is mine.
Finally, I would just love to talk about Yoichi’s obsession with having Kei look at him. Kei was his entire reason for still trying to live happily and not be empty all the time. Because really, the joy he gave him was through photographer. That film that Kei wrote caused Yoichi to cling to the concept of seeing a person truly and wholly through a lens. Kei’s version of understanding a person this way was by writing about them. My theory is that Kei is going to write about him in the second manga, and that is why he finally confessed at the end of this one. Because he’s ready to start trying to fully understand Yoichi.
But anyways, Yoichi knew this about Kei. And he got to witness the writing that Kei did, and was honored. However, when he tried to talk about his way of feeling happy and alive, photography, it always felt as if Kei wasn’t looking. Kei wasn’t looking at him, specifically.
Pain is a common method abusers who feel neglected will turn to. It’s in fiction and real life hundreds of times, and it’s a sad truth. It only makes sense that Yoichi began to hurt Kei, because it evoked genuine reactions directed solely at him. However, it still shocks me that Yoichi began to keep up the ruse of not hurting him for a long time, even though they both knew it was happening. It was almost like they were both sitting there and accepting the horrific codependency and denial of their relationship, even if it led to death. Because, deep down, I think they both want to die.
Yoichi wants to die with Kei. He wants to be with Kei, and have Kei’s eyes on him, always. He wants to be Kei’s film, because he wants to be Kei’s life.
Kei wants to die alone and free Yoichi from himself. He hates his actions and the way he writes, and the way he hurts everyone around him. And yet, he still promises to carry out their dreams together.
I don’t know guys, this was fucking beautiful. I may bump it up to five stars after this analysis because wow.
Anyways, thanks for reading! This was kinda long lol
Now playing “the rot//rot” by inuday
★ ★ ★ ★ ★
TW: suicide ideation, abuse, domestic violence, explicit sexual content, childhood trauma, death, grief, and alcoholism/substance abuse
Sleeping on Paper Boats is a haunting, historical bl story set in post-WW2 Japan, where we follow Kei Kitahara. Kitahara, as a child, was one of two survivors of a horrible train accident, and as he grew, his survivor’s guilt unknowingly manifested in maddening ways. He would see visions and figments of his childhood self, that he calls “Death”, almost a what if of if he’d died that day. To block out the things Death tells him and to expel these constant, agonizing words in his mind, he writes. He excels in screenwriting at a very young age, taking Japan by storm. However, the muses he inspires his works off of begin to meet sudden ends, and he realizes he must have some sort of curse. He swears to put his pen down and isolates himself in bar hopping and a reckless life in general. One day, he is saved and aided by Yoichi, the other boy who survived on the train that day many years ago. As they spend time together, Kitahara grows enamored with Yoichi, and he can’t help but begin fighting the desire to make Yoichi his next muse.
My thoughts
This was incredible. Kei is a beautifully tragic character who always seems to fall into deeper despair, no matter how hard he tries to simply end the suffering he brings on others. I will admit, as somebody who has struggled with suicide ideation myself, and still fights it, this was a tough read — but one that really executed the difficulty of even having a will to live really well.
One thing I found particularly relatable was the way Kei described writing as releasing all the words in his head that demanded to be said. I’ve always thought of my brain as an entire world trapped inside one person, since writing can sometimes feel physically painful because of how much is in my head that I simply can’t explain on paper, but I feel like I need to or else I can’t function. It was really refreshing and nice to see.
Yoichi was a terrifying and extremely well-written character. Since we don’t see the story from his perspective like we do Kei, we have to carefully watch and analyze things he says and what he does to understand his survivor’s guilt from the accident. However, when I did understand, I was taken away by how well the author portrayed it.
My one complaint was that the story was a tad hard to follow at times. Specifically some of the plot twists, although when I looked back on it in the middle of writing this, there were a lot of signs leading up to Yoichi’s plot twist.
This wasn’t something that ruined the story for me at all, though. I personally like when stories have a lot of depth that takes analysis to understand. I know that’s not everybody’s cup of tea, but it certainly is mine.
Finally, I would just love to talk about Yoichi’s obsession with having Kei look at him. Kei was his entire reason for still trying to live happily and not be empty all the time. Because really, the joy he gave him was through photographer. That film that Kei wrote caused Yoichi to cling to the concept of seeing a person truly and wholly through a lens. Kei’s version of understanding a person this way was by writing about them. My theory is that Kei is going to write about him in the second manga, and that is why he finally confessed at the end of this one. Because he’s ready to start trying to fully understand Yoichi.
But anyways, Yoichi knew this about Kei. And he got to witness the writing that Kei did, and was honored. However, when he tried to talk about his way of feeling happy and alive, photography, it always felt as if Kei wasn’t looking. Kei wasn’t looking at him, specifically.
Pain is a common method abusers who feel neglected will turn to. It’s in fiction and real life hundreds of times, and it’s a sad truth. It only makes sense that Yoichi began to hurt Kei, because it evoked genuine reactions directed solely at him. However, it still shocks me that Yoichi began to keep up the ruse of not hurting him for a long time, even though they both knew it was happening. It was almost like they were both sitting there and accepting the horrific codependency and denial of their relationship, even if it led to death. Because, deep down, I think they both want to die.
Yoichi wants to die with Kei. He wants to be with Kei, and have Kei’s eyes on him, always. He wants to be Kei’s film, because he wants to be Kei’s life.
Kei wants to die alone and free Yoichi from himself. He hates his actions and the way he writes, and the way he hurts everyone around him. And yet, he still promises to carry out their dreams together.
I don’t know guys, this was fucking beautiful. I may bump it up to five stars after this analysis because wow.
Anyways, thanks for reading! This was kinda long lol
Now playing “the rot//rot” by inuday
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 10, 2026
El arte y el talento artístico de Yatsuda-san es, como siempre, impresionante. En ese sentido, es una absoluta delicia visual. Pero en esta obra, la autora se enreda en una trama a mi parecer bastante confusa y complicada, que no acaba de convencer y que te deja con más preguntas que respuestas.
La parte romántica también sucede muy deprisa, no tiene suficiente desarrollo y se siente como que "falta algo".
A ver cómo se va desarrollando la trama en esta segunda parte ♥️
La parte romántica también sucede muy deprisa, no tiene suficiente desarrollo y se siente como que "falta algo".
A ver cómo se va desarrollando la trama en esta segunda parte ♥️
May 12, 2026
El punto fuerte de esta obra es el arte, que complementa muy bien con su atmósfera oscura y decadente.
Tratar la muerte desde cualquier parte del prisma es algo que siempre me ha interesado, pero llega un punto en el que me ha parecido que todo toma un cariz depresivo y suicida que llega a cansar. Aún así seguiré con el vol. II
Tratar la muerte desde cualquier parte del prisma es algo que siempre me ha interesado, pero llega un punto en el que me ha parecido que todo toma un cariz depresivo y suicida que llega a cansar. Aún así seguiré con el vol. II
May 31, 2026
the artwork in this was STUNNING and im a sucker for a toxic, twisted romance and a curse that feels impossible to escape unscathed so yeah im here for this. im interested to see how this all wraps up in the second volume! happy almost pride month y’all everyone get more evil and more gay NOW!!!!!!!!
July 20, 2026
Unsure how I feel about this one.
I went in blind after seeing some beautiful panels. After having read it, I can say the artwork IS beautiful, I’m just not sure how I feel about the development of the plot. I’ll read the second to determine how I feel about it as a whole, but as for right now… eh.
I went in blind after seeing some beautiful panels. After having read it, I can say the artwork IS beautiful, I’m just not sure how I feel about the development of the plot. I’ll read the second to determine how I feel about it as a whole, but as for right now… eh.
August 2, 2025
I fear I'm eating this one up. full review to come after I finished reading the second volume
October 30, 2025
3⭐️
Good, but went a bit too fast
Good, but went a bit too fast
November 3, 2025
Teki Yatsuda no decepciona
January 8, 2026
I loved this, yeah, but please stay doomed please stay doomed PLEASE STAY DOOMED
January 10, 2026
Me ha producido una sensación parecida a la de cuando vi por primera vez una pelicula de wong kar-wai
March 29, 2026
The art is beautiful.. even the creepy moments. I’m not 100 percent sure on what’s going on but I’m interested enough to finish the story.
March 30, 2026
I loved everything about this
April 13, 2026
I have no words really, just that this is one of my favourite books
5.75/5 ⭐️
5.75/5 ⭐️
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