The DeTextbook: The Stuff You don't Know About Stuff You Thought You Knew

by Cracked.com, Daniel O'Brien (Co-author)

Uh-oh. The New York Times bestselling authors from Cracked.com are back again . . .

It’s Cracked, but true. You Might Be a Zombie and Other Bad News was a New York Times bestseller and has already returned to print seven times. Now, the writers at the Internet’s #1 most-read humor site have created a dementedly hilarious textbook parody. By the time we were out of school, we’d learned that spinach is full of iron, there are three primary colors, and we have fi ve senses. Unfortunately, these and most of the other “facts” we crammed into our heads are simply not true. Th e Detextbook is here to erase it all—easily, painlessly, and hilariously.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, History, Science, Reference, Trivia, Comedy

335 pages, Kindle Edition

First published October 29, 2013

Reviews

[melydia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've been reading Cracked regularly for years. Though it began as a second-rate Mad Magazine knock-off, the website has become known for consistently high-quality articles that are both educational and hilarious. If you are offended by adult language or juvenile humor, this is not the book for you. Seriously, both the language and the jokes are utterly filthy.

Because this is basically one long Cracked article. It's laid out like most of their content: lists of incorrect things you were taught followed by true things you never learned about. I'd read some of the material previously, but there was more than enough new content to justify the purchase of the book. I was a little disappointed by the lack of a bibliography, especially since Cracked's online articles are full of links to references and further reading. Some of the claims were, while not strictly false, also not nearly 100% proven facts as presented. But honestly, while this claims to be educational (and it is, as far as that goes), it is first and foremost a humor book, and a humor site. Read it as such, and you'll probably enjoy it. You might even learn something on the way.

[AJourneyWithoutMap · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a no-nonsense stuff from Cracked.com, and those who are not familiar with it, may have to read through it with mouth opened. It is tight, witty, brief and thoroughly enjoyable.

In a sentence, The De-Textbook: The Stuff You Didn't Know About the Stuff You Thought You Knew by Cracked.com is just that. And tells you in an irresistible and interesting way! The division of chapters according to subject is very handy and makes the task easier to find what you are searching for.

It can be used as a reference book though the standard may come short if it is compared with other educational reference books but, all in all, it will prove to be as useful as it still is quite informative, deliciously funny and highly entertaining.

[Holden Attradies · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this read, but there were a couple of bumps that keep it from being a five star book but I'll get to that in a bit. First, I want to say that this book fits in with a whole lot of other books on my shelf, ones that I feel are all in the same genre but I don't know if that genre has a name. Placed next to Earth (The Book): A Visitor's Guide to the Human Race, America (The Book): A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction, Pocket Guide to the Apocalypse: The Official Field Manual for the End of the World and other such humorous but non-fiction books it fits right in.

The humor in here was great and I laughed my way through the whole book. Sure, a lot of the humor was kind of high brow and would probably go right over the head of younger people or people that just haven't read as much, but there is enough of the rest for the read to be wroth it for just about any one. The layout, the flow, it's all really good.

One complaint I've read in other reviews is that most or all of this appeared in some version on the web site. I guess my thought on that is, well, so what? It's awesome having the writing in this format, one that is easier to read than the web site which, although I love it, is horribly laid out and hard to navigate. And even if you have read "everything" on the site buying this is a great way to financially support a site that is giving you tons of great humor for fucking free.

So, what kept it from being five stars? I think the biggest thing was that not everything in here is as true as they present it. Without even fact checking I knew the Baghdad battery is pretty much B.S. It's not necessarily that what they said about it is technically wrong, it's that they stated the facts in a manner that presents the artifact as more than it probably was and implied it meant something it didn't. Most of the subjects here are also subjects that we learned "wrong" not because our teachers didn't want us to know, but because what we saw as "facts" and "true" has changed over the decades. Take the T Rex thing, you didn't learn about the feathers probably because it just wasn't accepted fact yet. And all facts have a half-life, and even the things they are spot on about will be wrong eventually. So it's that grain of salt you need to take the book with that drops it down a star, and especially because they don't really address this "fact".

[Amytiger · Rating 4 out of 5]

I like to think I'm smart. I don't ask people where the time cook button is on microwaves, and I can set an alarm on a clock without reading directions. In my mind, this roughly sets me equal to Einstein. But reading this book... I felt as smart as a cartoon adult (yes, that bad).

It taught me so much. So. Much.

I learned about biology, anatomy, world history, and with every page I couldn't help smiling.

Reasons to smile:

-this book is über funny
It makes fun of specific people, the readers, and everyone in between. They make fun of concepts, like Science. They make fun of everything, anything, that exists. They act like it exists just to be made fun of. If you can't laugh at other (INSERT ANYTHING FROM A NUN TO BALLOON), who can you laugh at?

-this book has pictures
Pictures of dinosaurs, pictures of Greece, pictures of the human body, pictures of ladybugs who know how to party, pictures of... I could go on and on, but I'm too busy telling you why you should read this book.

-teaches you a lot
I've already hit this point on the beginning of this review. Nevertheless: If you read this book as a reader you'll learn things you never knew you never knew. (My altar ego is Pocahontas)

All in all, don't let me be smarter than you. Read this book, laugh a lot, and think "Hey, I'm smarter or just as smart as the people who wrote this book and Amytiger along with the other readers of the DE-TEXTBOOK." Even if you don't learn anything, you'll have a fun time reading.

[Darnell · Rating 3 out of 5]

Full of factoids, many of them interesting, but I think it's basically an inferior version of the Cracked website. There are no links to citations (actually no citations at all) and the sections are even shorter than articles on the website. Not recommended if you read Cracked, because it mostly recycles their top articles.

[Ugnė Butkutė · Rating 5 out of 5]

Super interesting and funny book! I didn't check each statement, however, I really didn't know a lot of cool stuff. This was a perfect book for my mini-vacation at the beachside. Even thinking about reading another book written by Cracked.com team.

[Kristin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very interesting. Very funny. Very true. Very Cracked. Just remember it is Cracked. What their facts are right, but they don't leave room for "Things you thought were true are partially true." Just take what they say with a grain of salt and a lime (trust me, they'd approve) and if something they say interests you do more research.

[Javi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dick jokes and knowledge, this book rules.

[Kiet Huynh · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great book for children. Fuck Cucumber! Stop recommend these kinds for adults

[Terragyrl3 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Most laughing I’ve done in decades. Twice I had to set the book down and walk away, just to regain the power of speech in order to communicate to my family that an ambulance was not needed. I was hoping that I could stock this in my school library, but there are some sexually explicit chapters. Although the Cracked establishment has evolved lightyears beyond their smirky sexist outlook of the 1970s, wispy vestiges still remain. (“Boobs” still reigns as their favorite shortcut to a punchline.) That’s my only complaint. But overall, I am so grateful to take a trip back to my childhood days of reading snotty subversive humor. Nothing currently streaming or on TV has made me laugh so hard and so loudly for so long. And I forgot to even mention the warmly expressed life-affirming messages throughout. This book was a true joy. Best de-stresser ever.

[Tyler Siedelmann · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fun read full of misconceptions approached with a sense of humor that hits more often than it misses

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. Informative and hilarious. Wish I had bought the physical copy instead of the kindle copy so I could loan it to everyone I know.

[Kacee Moreton · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fun book.

[Allen Adams · Rating 4 out of 5]

http://www.themaineedge.com/buzz/what...

Cracked.com is one of the most popular humor sites on the internet. Their model is built around list-based articles designed to offer up nuggets of information that you might not have known couched in poop jokes and none-too-subtle innuendo. More often than not, they strike an entertaining balance between laughter and learning.

And now there’s a book.

It’s called “The De-Textbook: The Stuff You Didn’t Know About the Stuff You Thought You Knew”. It’s a collection of some of the greatest informational tidbits compiled by Cracked writers over the years; the template is your standard-issue high school textbook. The premise is simple: a lot of what you learned in school is misleading or even downright inaccurate. The Cracked crew takes great pains (and pleasure) in putting an end to those misconceptions and offering a heaping helping of truth with a side of jokes.

Lots and lots of jokes.

With chapters ranging from Health and Anatomy (Did you know that your pooping method is wrong?) to World History (The Dark Ages? Not that dark, it turns out) to Physics (How does a bicycle work? No one knows), “The De-Textbook” takes a lot of the information that we’ve “known” for years and turns it on its head.

And it’s all done via a wonderfully-realized parody of the standard textbook. From the omnipresent illustrative figures to the full-page standalone inserts, “The De-Textbook” is high school reading material reflected in a funhouse mirror. Perhaps surprisingly, the book never strays too far from its mission to genuinely inform. Sure, it is all presented with tongues planted firmly in cheeks, but the tone never detracts from the substance. If anything, it only serves to enhance it – think Howard Zinn as a stand-up comedian and you’re in the ballpark.

The writers of this book (of which there are legion; nearly 60 names are credited between Cracked editors and contributors) have clearly taken great delight in uncovering forgotten and/or ignored educational tidbits. Many times, after debunking a particularly popular piece of data, they will offer up a replacement fact that winds up being even more fascinating than the original.

There’s no doubt that there’s a reward in learning something new. Cracked understands that as well as anybody; they’ve built a significant portion of their wonderfully broad website around that idea of telling the audience something they don’t know in an interesting way. “The De-Textbook” is a logical offshoot of that idea. And let’s be frank – there’s something delightfully subversive about a book that looks like a textbook and acts like a textbook, yet is somehow not quite a textbook.

Whether you want to know more about your body and brain or are just looking for some surprising facts about dinosaurs, ninjas and explosions, “The De-Textbook” is perfect for you. In short: if you’re curious to find out just what you don’t know about the stuff that you were pretty sure you knew, this book is a great place to start.

[Lostshadows · Rating 3 out of 5]

If you've ever visited Cracked.com, this book is about what you'd expect; short, easily digestible, humorous pieces, just with less lists and no links to suck you in for several hours.

However, given this book's premise, the fact checking should have been much better. There were a number of things that, as I read through, I noted down as facts to double check before writing this review, then I hit the section that talked about why things weren't better way back when, and I no longer needed to.

The section has many valid points, it also has a handy chart of things to consider about the 1910s-1990s. While the chart is clearly humorous, the three items listed under the 1990s contains two that I know are just plain wrong.

Yes Cracked.com, the internet and cell phones both existed in the 90s. Cell phones have been commercially available since the early 80s and the origins of the internet date back to the 60s. Both experienced a noticeable growth in the 90s. (Also, Tyrannosaurus Rex, still badass, even with feathers.)

In short, its funny, but keep in mind the facts here are probably as reliable as the stuff they're claiming to clear up.

[Jeannie · Rating 3 out of 5]

You're brushing your teeth wrong. You're sleeping wrong. You're pooping wrong. You've been going about everything in life all wrong . What a mess you are! Thankfully, the staff at Cracked(dot)com are here to set you straight. Did you know that T. Rex was not the scariest of the dinosaurs and velociraptor was basically a chicken on crack? So much of what you learned in school was completely incorrect: Napolean was actually above average in height for his time, and Machiavelli was no tyrant (he merely satirized one in "The Prince"). Did you also know that the doorknob was not created until 1878? Cold War Spies were so bored at work that they often times invented their own head-games to stay awake at work, and there was a three day-long "Straw Hat Riot" in New York City. Oddly, the most boring chapter is the one on SEX, which is fraught with far too many "Cosmopolitan" magazine references. (I gather the Cracked staff is largely male, hmm?) If you're someone who reads a lot, you probably already know most of the information presented in these pages; though the trade witticism of the Cracked staff makes this a fun and informative read all the same.

[K · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lot of what you know is mostly dumbed down. There are countless planets in our solar system, Hitler posed for drastic photos, you’re brushing your teeth wrong, and much more.

I found this book to be very funny and very enjoyable, especially how it had a topic for nearly everyone. They even had a section about incest within the Bible and a section about how social media is hurting our rate of friendship growth. Really just a WIDE spectrum.

I think the only fault I might have with it is that it’s mostly aimed for the male audience.

[Kira Nerys · Rating 4 out of 5]

I used to be a big fan of Cracked, back before they fired their entire video production department and their YouTube channel went inert. I'd read the articles, too, when there weren't any new videos to watch. So I started thinking about reading this book a while ago, when I already had a good sense of their writing style, sense of humor, and interests. The De-Textbook encapsulates a lot of elements I've seen on the website, with a toned-down, streamlined approach. There weren't nearly so many dick jokes as I expected when I read the introduction. There wasn't much extra to the book, either. Each topic was brought up and disabused succinctly and sarcastically, so, uh . . . getting written sarcasm is a pretty essential skill if you're thinking about reading this. (It's not that hard.) The book lends itself to being picked up and put down, with its short sections and easily referenced topics, yet its fast pacing provided a much quicker read than I expected. There were things I already knew--breathe from your diaphragm, the T-rex wasn't all it's cracked up to be, Greek statues were originally garishly painted, which US President liked waving his penis around (I see you, Dan O'Brien)--and plenty I didn't. The one I'd most like to remember: when the Pilgrims arrived in America, they weren't repelled by Native Americans because a plague had just swept the entire country, killing up to 90% of the native population (ch.6.A, p.111). That's absolutely fascinating, and I might dig up an entire article on it, because this page-long summary didn't give me as much information as I wanted. Unfortunately, the book's lacking in the bibliography department (as in, not even a "works cited"), so I can't easily find out where they learned this. I know this book's meant to be funny, but it's really meant to be informative, because Cracked does prioritize good journalism and educational articles, in its own way. (Not as sure of this since Jack O'Brien left.) Anyway, the book's greatest flaw is its lack of bibliography; I could complain about some poor word choices, but they're infrequent. The De-Textbook was a fun, enjoyable read, probably a great choice for any 13-year-old, and definitely capable of teaching everyone a couple of interesting, party-worthy facts. Unless sharing the nickname of a president's penis isn't your party trick. Maybe tell people how to correctly poop instead.

[Kris · Rating 3 out of 5]

Decent as far as it goes. Many of the things I knew before, and many of them don't have context that goes far enough--yes, only Western Europe was that bad as far as the dark ages go, but they don't touch on WHY (the church figuring the best way to thrive is to keep people ignorant and beholden). Also, if by "veil" you actually mean "burka" when speaking of how Muslim women dress, say that up front. Because hijab and burka are very very different things, and not many wear the burka (esp by 100% choice) but many many more choose to wear hijab. So reasonably fun to read, but if you read a lot, not much will surprise you.

[Zachary · Rating 5 out of 5]

THE DE-TEXTBOOK

I've was a teacher for a long time, (middle school.) I wish I had this book when I was teaching because some of the things that the kids are learning today are useless! Why not give their brains something to walk away with? I know, I know, I probably will be the only one that feels this was, but, hey, I was put on probation by a principal who told me if I ..... never mind. Buy the book, you'll love it. Even if it ends up in the bathroom as "one of those books!" FUN, FUN READ!!! 😀 🎓🛀🐮

[Debi Anderson · Rating 5 out of 5]

EVERYONE NEEDS TO READ THIS BOOK, SERIOUSLY!!!

If you love to laugh, are older than 20, want to know all the ridiculous and wrong things you were taught as a child, this book is a must. In it, you will learn why using a toilet is bad for you; the ways your brain hasn't evolved and why; the reason why you shouldn't get annual check ups; and lots of other things having to do with your body, history, science, medicine, etc. You will find yourself laughing uproariously at the humorous way these facts are presented. THE TITLE IS VERY APROPOS !!!!!

[Joshua Dancer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Entertaining enough, and covers a lot of interesting stuff, but the authors don't cite any sources (apart from generic references like "government statistics" or "a study in [country]"), which means the books is also useless to cite as a source. Not that I expected something super scholarly from Cracked, but minimum wiki standards would have been nice.

[John Haake · Rating 4 out of 5]

The De-Textbook is really good and really interesting. It, however, reads more like a stand-up comic's routine (the now almost normal cussing and swearing type of routine).

I took a star off of an otherwise excellent book because of some of the crassness.

Most interesting item to me: the lack of "blue" in ancient Greece.

[Katherine · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was a fairly decent "random facts to read in the bathroom" book. There were a few things in here that surprised me, but to be honest, anyone with a decent education and/or level of curiosity won't find much new that's in here.

It's basically a series of Cracked articles, which is totally fine for what it is, but it also feels a little dated, and very much written by mostly white men.

[Roberto · Rating 4 out of 5]

Por lo general los libros que "rompen" mitos o los desmenuzan hasta disolverlos me gustan pero en este caso, donde la manera de deshacer dichos mitos es a través de humor, puedo decir que es de las mejores lecturas que he hecho en este 2018. Muy recomendable para volver a darle una mirada más a detalle a muchos de nuestros "conocimientos".

[Simon Collis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very funny and also though provoking. Proper science, rendered in comic form, fighting against a tide of misinformation. Worth reading for the jokes alone; the fact that it’s fascinating is a bonus. But whether I actually learnt anything from it - they even discuss whether that’s even possible. Oh well...

[Dovilė Stonė · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nebloga knyga paskaitymui tualete arba kokioj poliklinikoj. :D Ne daugiau.

Juokingas keikūniškas stilius, įdomūs faktoidai, bet stipriai jais pasitikėti nelinkčiau. Paskaitai, pakraipai galvą ir gyveni toliau. Vietomis vieni mitai tiesiog pakeičiami kitais mitais (pvz., kad placebas neva veikia taip pat "gerai" kaip sudėtinga operacija).

[Jandro · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book many years ago and finally read it. I wish I had read it sooner, as it would have kept me from making several unnecessary mistakes and having so much superfluous fear. I am glad the world is closed to large gatherings because I would be insufferable with all of the awesome new facts I've learned.

[Cristi Julsrud · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this up at a used bookstore for 75¢ and I thought I'd just flip through to see if it's appropriate to shelve in my classroom. I'm not 100% sure it is; there are a lot of sex jokes and body humor but dang if I didn't end up learning a lot of interesting if relatively useless information from reading it 😂

Definitely worth 75 cents!

[Jenna Ferchoff · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was a really fun book to read. I learned a lot of interesting facts although there is a couple in there I still wasn't sure they verified properly. It seemed to be a pretty good revamp on all the inaccurate facts we are taught during our public education years.