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The Secret History of Kindness: Learning from How Dogs Learn
Years back, Melissa Holbrook Pierson brought home a border collie named Mercy, without a clue of how to get her to behave. Stunned after hiring a trainer whose immediate rapport with Mercy seemed magical, Pierson began delving into the techniques of positive reinforcement. She made her way to B. F. Skinner, the behavioral psychologist who started it all, the man who could train a pigeon to dance in minutes and whose research on how behavior is acquired has ramifications for military dolphin trainers, athletes, dancers, and, as he originally conceived, society at large.
To learn more, Pierson met with a host of fascinating animal behaviorists, going behind the scenes to witness the relationships between trainers and animals at the National Zoo in Washington, DC, and to the in-depth seminars at a Clicker Expo where all the dogs but hers seemed to be learning new tricks. The often startling story of what became of a pathbreaking scientist’s work is interwoven with a more personal tale of how to understand the foreign species with whom we are privileged to live.
Pierson draws surprising connections in her exploration of how kindness works to motivate all animals, including the human one.
To learn more, Pierson met with a host of fascinating animal behaviorists, going behind the scenes to witness the relationships between trainers and animals at the National Zoo in Washington, DC, and to the in-depth seminars at a Clicker Expo where all the dogs but hers seemed to be learning new tricks. The often startling story of what became of a pathbreaking scientist’s work is interwoven with a more personal tale of how to understand the foreign species with whom we are privileged to live.
Pierson draws surprising connections in her exploration of how kindness works to motivate all animals, including the human one.
320 pages, Hardcover
First published April 20, 2015
19 people are currently reading
387 people want to read
About the author
Melissa Holbrook Pierson
13 books19 followersMelissa Holbrook Pierson is the author of the acclaimed Dark Horses and Black Beauties, The Perfect Vehicle, The Place You Love Is Gone, and her newest book, The Man Who Would Stop At Nothing was published in the fall of 2011.
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Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
December 22, 2018
Melissa Holbrook Pierson insists the information she is trying to share has been available for decades. Valiant attempts at dissemination have been made. Folks simply weren't interested. The closest any effort came to success was Karen Pryor's book, Don't Shoot the Dog! - of which Pierson declares:
"She could not have been more clear or encouraging about the possibilities. If it weren't for the misleading title, the book, brilliant as it is, may not have had any readers at all, even dog trainers. In choosing the tongue-in-cheek and inflammatory title, the publisher sought to do two things: sell books, and avoid any scent of taboo emanating from the true subject, which is actually one of the biggest taboos there is, training people."
It seems obvious Pierson has taken a lesson here. Her work, titled The Secret History of Kindness: Learning from How Dogs Learn, is in fact a long and disjointed treatise on animal cruelty. The "history" she refers to is psychologist B.F. Skinner's work in operant conditioning - which she feels (quite strongly) has been under-attended. If only we, as a society, would abandon punishment altogether and embrace training solely through reward, the world would be a much better place and we much healthier people. Now you can shoehorn kindness in there somewhere, I'm sure, but the book isn't focused on it. (And, in the spirit of kindness, I will warn that focus is also something a reader might find herself looking for.)
What receives the bulk of Pierson's attention, and therefore ours, is canine clicker training. While the procedure is dauntingly over-intellectualized, you can just about make out the author's young pup Nelly being discreetly clicked into patterns of productive behavior. Both owner and pet find themselves reveling in the process; each lesson a reward and reward a lesson. Correlations are drawn in no time flat to human psychology and the manner in which people learn most effectively. Though she never quite crosses the line to claim a clicker as the missing Rosetta Stone in childhood development, it seemed awfully clear to me that this was her intent. Yet try as I might, through chapter after chapter of referenced sourcework, the only road I could locate for human clicker training was the one heading toward a successful plea of Not Guilty by Reason of Insanity. ("It was all click, click, click with her, and in public, if you can believe!" The jury members nod sympathetically.)
Though the title is woefully misleading, and the content a struggle to absorb, it should be noted that Pierson's passion is largely (and perhaps solely) to blame. Some revelations take a bit of time to settle in the mind, and cannot be expressed or acted upon until they have...which might make her second entry into this arena far more intriguing than this first.
"She could not have been more clear or encouraging about the possibilities. If it weren't for the misleading title, the book, brilliant as it is, may not have had any readers at all, even dog trainers. In choosing the tongue-in-cheek and inflammatory title, the publisher sought to do two things: sell books, and avoid any scent of taboo emanating from the true subject, which is actually one of the biggest taboos there is, training people."
It seems obvious Pierson has taken a lesson here. Her work, titled The Secret History of Kindness: Learning from How Dogs Learn, is in fact a long and disjointed treatise on animal cruelty. The "history" she refers to is psychologist B.F. Skinner's work in operant conditioning - which she feels (quite strongly) has been under-attended. If only we, as a society, would abandon punishment altogether and embrace training solely through reward, the world would be a much better place and we much healthier people. Now you can shoehorn kindness in there somewhere, I'm sure, but the book isn't focused on it. (And, in the spirit of kindness, I will warn that focus is also something a reader might find herself looking for.)
What receives the bulk of Pierson's attention, and therefore ours, is canine clicker training. While the procedure is dauntingly over-intellectualized, you can just about make out the author's young pup Nelly being discreetly clicked into patterns of productive behavior. Both owner and pet find themselves reveling in the process; each lesson a reward and reward a lesson. Correlations are drawn in no time flat to human psychology and the manner in which people learn most effectively. Though she never quite crosses the line to claim a clicker as the missing Rosetta Stone in childhood development, it seemed awfully clear to me that this was her intent. Yet try as I might, through chapter after chapter of referenced sourcework, the only road I could locate for human clicker training was the one heading toward a successful plea of Not Guilty by Reason of Insanity. ("It was all click, click, click with her, and in public, if you can believe!" The jury members nod sympathetically.)
Though the title is woefully misleading, and the content a struggle to absorb, it should be noted that Pierson's passion is largely (and perhaps solely) to blame. Some revelations take a bit of time to settle in the mind, and cannot be expressed or acted upon until they have...which might make her second entry into this arena far more intriguing than this first.
August 6, 2018
This book details the author’s journey into the wondrous land of dog training through positive reinforcement. I’m already such a convert to the concept of clicker training that I probably didn’t need to read this. I thought the early chapters were rather academically dense—almost as if the author somehow felt a need to establish some kind of scholarly street creds. Then there’s a rather worshipful section on B. F. Skinner, and eventually you get a good look at her experiences learning to train positively.
If you’re a guide dog handler, and if you’re already converted to the concept of positive reinforcement, this book won’t do much for you. It’s well enough written, but you can get better more pertinent information about how to work your dog from any of the dog schools or the two consumer organizations. But in her defense, she didn’t write this book to a guide-dog-handling audience.
I don’t mean to be perverse with this review, because I’m sure she has a lot to say that will wow and dazzle the typical dog owner and convince him or her to abandon the yank-and-yell approach of yesteryear. But among the best parts of this for me was her trash, slash, and burn approach to Cesar Millan. If you don’t read the entire book, at least scope out that chapter. It is well, well worth your time—brilliantly written and well reasoned. Of course, if you’re a Millan fan, maybe you just avoid this book. As for me, I’m blown away by the difference a good treat pouch and well-used clicker can make. But I realize lots of folks will have divergent perspectives, and if yours works, good for you.
Part of my problem with the book is my expectations. I’ve been burned by a Gregory Burns book recently for the same reason, (no pun intended.) I go into this thinking I’ll learn some new or interesting ideas regarding clicker training and treats, and I get books that are rather different from my expectations. That doesn’t make the book unworthy; it just means my expectations going in were out of line, and that kind of dissonance always makes for a less-than optimal reading experience. But the fault is mine, not the author’s.
If you’re a guide dog handler, and if you’re already converted to the concept of positive reinforcement, this book won’t do much for you. It’s well enough written, but you can get better more pertinent information about how to work your dog from any of the dog schools or the two consumer organizations. But in her defense, she didn’t write this book to a guide-dog-handling audience.
I don’t mean to be perverse with this review, because I’m sure she has a lot to say that will wow and dazzle the typical dog owner and convince him or her to abandon the yank-and-yell approach of yesteryear. But among the best parts of this for me was her trash, slash, and burn approach to Cesar Millan. If you don’t read the entire book, at least scope out that chapter. It is well, well worth your time—brilliantly written and well reasoned. Of course, if you’re a Millan fan, maybe you just avoid this book. As for me, I’m blown away by the difference a good treat pouch and well-used clicker can make. But I realize lots of folks will have divergent perspectives, and if yours works, good for you.
Part of my problem with the book is my expectations. I’ve been burned by a Gregory Burns book recently for the same reason, (no pun intended.) I go into this thinking I’ll learn some new or interesting ideas regarding clicker training and treats, and I get books that are rather different from my expectations. That doesn’t make the book unworthy; it just means my expectations going in were out of line, and that kind of dissonance always makes for a less-than optimal reading experience. But the fault is mine, not the author’s.
December 20, 2018
oooph this book is a mess - i'm not even sure where to start because i wanted to love it because we share a belief in dog trainign rooted in kindness, mutual respect and relationship building between dogs and people. however the book is at best disjointed and spirals out on all kinds of tangents including some very long-winded theory-heavy chapters that feel like a academic paper and not really connected to the book
My main complaints:
* this is a book about kindness but.... it starts with being unexamined judgmental/unkind towards people experiencing homelessness in prospect park (brooklyn) near where i used to live.
* the book reads like an infomercial for Karen Pryor and her ClickerExpo ---- i'm a fan of clicker training and Karen Proyrs work I'm even going to ClickerExpo next year.....but the way it is written about in this book was so offputting and infomercial-like I found myself tuning out and instead of being inspired I felt like I was reading the pitch from a fast talking salesman
* Worst of all to me this author brags about being neglectful of her own dog in some attempt at giving her a "wolf like" natural experience. She allows her dog offleash on prospect park trails (where dogs aren't allowed offleash) including a young puppy with no recall. I know dogs aren't allowed off leash there because when we lived near the park dogs like the authors would terrorize my leashed dogs in violation of clearly posted leash law signs. I found this section especially irritating because the author actually in the same breath as breaking leash law had audacity to complain about people who are homeless and camping on those trails.
Then towards the end of the book she spoke of hiking in Mohonk National Park in the Hudson Valley (where we also would go to hike with our dogs when we lived in NYC) and allowing her dog offleash - which is illegal because it is dangerous for other park goers and wildlife. Not only that but for hours she proudly writes she has NO IDEA WHERE HER DOG IS and bragged that her dog got to be free ........ NOPE. not only have you severely endangered your dog, you've endangered anyone else (and their dogs) hiking in that national park not to mention the wildlife your dog is disrupting and injurying while running through the underbrush off trail (as she regularly bragged about) near cliffs etc. this is not someone whose perspective helps any of us who are clicker training or positive reinforcement training dogs and encouraging others to do the same.
If i could give this book less than 1 star I would
My main complaints:
* this is a book about kindness but.... it starts with being unexamined judgmental/unkind towards people experiencing homelessness in prospect park (brooklyn) near where i used to live.
* the book reads like an infomercial for Karen Pryor and her ClickerExpo ---- i'm a fan of clicker training and Karen Proyrs work I'm even going to ClickerExpo next year.....but the way it is written about in this book was so offputting and infomercial-like I found myself tuning out and instead of being inspired I felt like I was reading the pitch from a fast talking salesman
* Worst of all to me this author brags about being neglectful of her own dog in some attempt at giving her a "wolf like" natural experience. She allows her dog offleash on prospect park trails (where dogs aren't allowed offleash) including a young puppy with no recall. I know dogs aren't allowed off leash there because when we lived near the park dogs like the authors would terrorize my leashed dogs in violation of clearly posted leash law signs. I found this section especially irritating because the author actually in the same breath as breaking leash law had audacity to complain about people who are homeless and camping on those trails.
Then towards the end of the book she spoke of hiking in Mohonk National Park in the Hudson Valley (where we also would go to hike with our dogs when we lived in NYC) and allowing her dog offleash - which is illegal because it is dangerous for other park goers and wildlife. Not only that but for hours she proudly writes she has NO IDEA WHERE HER DOG IS and bragged that her dog got to be free ........ NOPE. not only have you severely endangered your dog, you've endangered anyone else (and their dogs) hiking in that national park not to mention the wildlife your dog is disrupting and injurying while running through the underbrush off trail (as she regularly bragged about) near cliffs etc. this is not someone whose perspective helps any of us who are clicker training or positive reinforcement training dogs and encouraging others to do the same.
If i could give this book less than 1 star I would
December 17, 2019
I was intrigued by the title because kindness is probably my most cherished value. I was surprised that the book doesn't mention kindness to any great degree. By implication, however, it provides a compelling prescription for kindness to our dogs, to other animals, to other human beings and ourselves ... in short, to all sentient beings. The early chapters are deep into the research conducted most compellingly by B. F. Skinner into operant conditioning and positive reinforcement as applied to animals and ultimately to human beings, and Pierson makes the point that Skinner has been misunderstood and wrongly maligned. The rest of the book provides examples of how Skinner's methods are gaining ground and finding success and acceptance in the world of animal training, and especially the clicker training often used now with dogs. Be prepared for a lot of footnotes. But know that you are in skilled hands exploring the philosophical and ethical underpinnings of what is increasingly the preferred method of interacting with animals to achieve the results that humans want. This isn't a step by stop how to ... but it made me eager to engage in these strategies with my dog. In fact, I already have my clicker! And if you are a fan of Cesar Millan, as I was at one time, be prepared to recognize that his approach is the antithesis of kindness and no dog should be subjected to it. Highly recommended if you love animals and want to better understand their true natures.
June 28, 2015
Too disconnected and rambling. There were only a few good insights into dogs but basically they came down to looking at things from the dog's perspective and accepting their innate nature. For example: Dogs like steaks better than dry dog food because steaks are better than dry dog food and smell like something wolves would eat so, of course, the dog wants your steak and doesn't inherently understand that it's not his. Shocker, no? I'll check out some of the actual dog behavior books that don't also try to include the history of human psychology.
November 13, 2023
I read this just at the right time: both for the new family member in our lives, and because I happened to have just finished"Dopamine Nation" and the two books complement each other well.
March 8, 2022
My public library carried only one book by this author - and this was it. No one would ever call me a dog person, so if I'd had a choice of any of her other books I wouldn't have read this.
It's part history lesson on B.F. Skinner and those who have followed in his footsteps, part memoir of her experience training her dog. I did find some of her statements and turns of phrase to be questionable, but over-all so thoroughly thought provoking and fascinating that I dare say it's been life changing.
It's all about operant conditioning, which (who knew?!) is just the science of how our brains learn. In a nutshell it means that we pursue the pleasant, avoid the unpleasant, and ignore the neutral in our lives & environments. The intentional application is called "shaping." Sounds sci-fi, but without the fi. Science has proven that applied positive reinforcement is wildly more effective and efficient at training any organism (from bugs to humans) than the default model of applied punishment. The fact that we've known this for decades and yet continue to live in/create the world we do is nothing less than the most devastating tragedy ever to befall this planet. If you are ready for a paradigm shift, I recommend perusing this little gem.
It's part history lesson on B.F. Skinner and those who have followed in his footsteps, part memoir of her experience training her dog. I did find some of her statements and turns of phrase to be questionable, but over-all so thoroughly thought provoking and fascinating that I dare say it's been life changing.
It's all about operant conditioning, which (who knew?!) is just the science of how our brains learn. In a nutshell it means that we pursue the pleasant, avoid the unpleasant, and ignore the neutral in our lives & environments. The intentional application is called "shaping." Sounds sci-fi, but without the fi. Science has proven that applied positive reinforcement is wildly more effective and efficient at training any organism (from bugs to humans) than the default model of applied punishment. The fact that we've known this for decades and yet continue to live in/create the world we do is nothing less than the most devastating tragedy ever to befall this planet. If you are ready for a paradigm shift, I recommend perusing this little gem.
February 7, 2024
This is a good book, but not a perfect one. I learned a lot reading this book and highly recommend it as an eye opening way to experience BF Skinner and the ideas of positive reinforcement. That being said. She's preachy. Shes judgmental. You end up questioning her choices and values a lot, depending on where you are in your dog training and animal relations journey. There's a lot in this book, like a chapter dedicated to 'zoochosis' which is a radical left wing animal rights term, that are presented as fact when in reality it's more opinion than science. But I think if you can keep an open, relatively relaxed mind this is a great book to read when you're exploring how positive reinforcement training and operant conditioning works. There's a lot of info that just helps you understand how organisms learn, and it's a great book for explaining that. I also would recommend this to anyone who is interested in teaching, because she makes great arguments on how to actually teach something, no matter your species.
September 15, 2024
I think there’s a lot of good stuff in here and I am absolutely convinced by her primary point: that reward based training is far superior to using punishment. I also think that the general concepts are really exciting and important and probably underutilized. I did find some of her personal stories a little too long and sometimes even eyebrow m-raising, especially how she let her dog run off even public parks and places where they shouldn’t.
I also felt that sometimes she was so focused on behavior and reinforcement that she really lost sense of the individual. I’m not denying that these are incredibly powerful forces, perhaps the most powerful ones at the end of the day, but there are still feelings and thoughts and individual differences, some of which she actually acknowledged in the book itself, and these really can make a difference in training and the like. I felt that these were sort of briefly mentioned and then forgotten about.
It’s also a bit longer than it needs to be, and I think a good editor would’ve made this book even better. Still, a worthwhile read!
I also felt that sometimes she was so focused on behavior and reinforcement that she really lost sense of the individual. I’m not denying that these are incredibly powerful forces, perhaps the most powerful ones at the end of the day, but there are still feelings and thoughts and individual differences, some of which she actually acknowledged in the book itself, and these really can make a difference in training and the like. I felt that these were sort of briefly mentioned and then forgotten about.
It’s also a bit longer than it needs to be, and I think a good editor would’ve made this book even better. Still, a worthwhile read!
June 19, 2019
This book helped me to remember what I already know -- basically that positive reinforcement works! And that it is backed up by science time and time again. Why we refuse to use this to our advantage is still a mystery, though. I guess old habits are hard to break, as well as old beliefs about what works. I find this knowledge applicable not only to dog training but also to parenting and teaching. I did skim/skip some sections of the book that I found a little too dry, but overall, I felt it was an informative read.
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July 9, 2023Opens by praising ABA “therapy” for autistic children which has come to be known as abusive. That didn’t inspire much on the topic of “kindness” nor did I trust the author’s opinions on human psychology or humane “training” after that so I dropped it.
August 20, 2018
Are you a female and love dogs?? READ. NOW.
December 29, 2019
Could have been been edited a bit more closely.
January 18, 2023
2.5 interesting but rather dry.
June 28, 2015
Brilliant and hilarious. Dense with information, insights and opinions. I didn't agree with every opinion and even chafed a bit at those presented as "true" (don't get carried away Melissa). Regardless, endlessly thought provoking.
This is not the book I was expecting. I picked it up because of the picture on the cover, I can't resist a good dog book. But this is so much more. Be prepared, it's not a light read.
It is a retrospective of B.F. Skinner's theory of operant conditioning: the historical context, the criticisms, the fall out, application at every level from rats and birds to societies and nations and our stubborn insistence on punishment and coercion. And enough personal examples with Mercy and Nelly to bring her points home and give a dog lover her stories.
This is not the book I was expecting. I picked it up because of the picture on the cover, I can't resist a good dog book. But this is so much more. Be prepared, it's not a light read.
It is a retrospective of B.F. Skinner's theory of operant conditioning: the historical context, the criticisms, the fall out, application at every level from rats and birds to societies and nations and our stubborn insistence on punishment and coercion. And enough personal examples with Mercy and Nelly to bring her points home and give a dog lover her stories.
April 6, 2016
Highly recommended
I usually rely on borrowing library books, but after the BARK magazine review of this book, I did not hesitate to add it to my own library. It did not disappoint. I have "dabbled" at clicker training my own dogs, with good success. Even though this is not a "how to," I gleaned some valuable tips. I believed I was fairly experienced and certainly well read on the subject of clicker training, but even so, the author's in depth discussions were illuminating. I think it was most fascinating for the discussions of kindness and cruelty in humans and the possible reasons why. I will re-read this book, there is so much to think about. Highly recommended.
I usually rely on borrowing library books, but after the BARK magazine review of this book, I did not hesitate to add it to my own library. It did not disappoint. I have "dabbled" at clicker training my own dogs, with good success. Even though this is not a "how to," I gleaned some valuable tips. I believed I was fairly experienced and certainly well read on the subject of clicker training, but even so, the author's in depth discussions were illuminating. I think it was most fascinating for the discussions of kindness and cruelty in humans and the possible reasons why. I will re-read this book, there is so much to think about. Highly recommended.
May 10, 2016
This was a very verbose book but definitely made me a believer in clicker training. One of the quotes I really liked from the book was 'you get the dog that you need'. Which was so so so true of Zoe, Zoe was a bit zany and I was as well when I first got her. I was emotionally fraught and so was Zoe, I was needy to umpteenth degree and so was my dear sweet Zoe. She was a game changer; she needed me as much as I needed her.
May 18, 2015
This woman has done more research than I ever did in my whole educational career. She has shared too much of her research without cleanly drawing understandable conclusions. The average dig person isn't going to spend the time to tease out the nougats of truth enmeshed in so much science.
August 18, 2015
pretty dense reading...explains the science that supports positive training methods.
August 27, 2015
The cover is deceptive. This is a very heavy book delving into pyschology and old theories pretty deeply.
NOT FUN.
Good for research.
NOT FUN.
Good for research.
September 5, 2015
Overall, liked it a whole lot. MUCH dog nerdiness to satisfy my need. Was a slooow start - I understand the relevance of the history of operant conditioning...just tough to wade through.
November 13, 2015
Didn't really
September 8, 2016
This is a very interesting book about positive training methods and the work of BF Skinner.
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews