How to Talk to Your Kids About Death

by Jessica Borelli (Author, Narrator), The Great Courses

2 hrs and 10 mins

The experience of loss is universal, and yet grief is a varied and individual ordeal. Children especially need comfort and guidance when dealing with the confusion and intense emotions of a loss and it is up to the adults in their lives to provide this crucial support—but our own emotions can make this difficult task even more daunting.
In the six lectures of How to Talk to Your Kids about Death, professor and practicing psychologist Dr. Jessica Borelli will help you navigate the complexities of discussing death with children in a way that offers them the support and attention they need at such a confusing time. With Dr. Borelli’s guidance, you’ll learn:

* Why it is crucial to center yourself first so you are better prepared to help others;
* What kind of language to use to best present distressing information;
* To see from a child’s perspective to better understand and anticipate their reactions;
* Why it is important to try to discuss death and dying before a child actually experiences loss;
* How to help process emotions beyond sadness—such as fear, anger, or guilt.

These and other aspects of communication will form an invaluable toolbox for when you must deal with the difficult conversations surrounding death and mortality. By looking at these conversations from the perspective of a child—someone lacking the crucial tools and experience to process grief on their own—you will be better prepared for this unfortunate but inevitable situation. Whether you must prepare a child for the death of a beloved pet or deliver the news of a sudden illness in the family, the strategies Dr. Borelli provides will help you be the empathetic, supportive, and reassuring presence every child needs in times of grief and loss.

3 pages, Audible Audio

Published October 10, 2024

Reviews

[Michelle L · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this so much. Packed with real actual advice and guidance. Situationally sensitive. Based on both professional experience and research. Accessible and honest. It was a combination of eye-level tough love and science-backed real talk. I can see it being especially useful for people who tend to make decisions based on “what sounds good” and “what makes sense.” But it really is for anyone who wants to make informed communication choices. Even its brevity makes it easy to take in if you are facing the worst and need advice immediately.

[Sidnie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Our kids have had a lot of questions about dying since a close family member died two years ago, and this provided a really great attachment-theory based approach to explaining to kids (with research-backed information) how to explain a great variety of deaths, would recommend to any parent for how to explain death. A heads up that the last part of the book talks about how to explain to a terminally-ill child that they are dying which I hope to God never is something I need and was upsetting, though really grounded my perspective as a parent.

[Yukio · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oh the trauma this brought forth again.

[Ashley O'shea · Rating 4 out of 5]

My kids’ grandmother recently died. I wished I read this a couple months ago but this has helped validate what we did and also explain some of our experiences.