Smitten: Romantic Obsession, the Neuroscience of Limerence, and How to Make Love Last

by Tom Bellamy

A groundbreaking exploration of the psychology of infatuation, how to recognize it, and how to move beyond it towards a healthier experience of love.

“Butterflies” in the stomach, intrusive thoughts, fantasies about imaginary scenarios, mood swings from euphoria to despair… aren't these all the familiar hallmarks of new love? Not quite. These are characteristics of the psychological state of “limerence,” also known as obsessive, passionate or addictive love that can become unhealthy.

Millions of people experience limerence at some point in their life, and in this book, neuroscientist Dr Tom Bellamy explores advances in neuroscience since the term was coined in the 1970s, and sheds light on this little-understood element of the human experience.

· what drives limerence

· how to recognize limerence in yourself and others

· how to manage the phases of addiction to another person

· how to move past it to sustain longer, more fulfilling relationships.

With supportive advice about next steps, this book will help readers struggling with unwanted feelings to find emotional equilibrium. Rooted in neuroscience, this book offers practical guidance for those experiencing obsessive love and seeking emotional balance.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Self Help, Audiobook, Adult, Science, Relationships

282 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 3, 2026

About the author

Tom Bellamy is an academic neuroscientist and Associate Professor at the University of Nottingham in the UK. His research involves studying the fundamental mechanisms of the brain (the nuts and bolts of synaptic signaling), but he also writes about how this fundamental neuroscience can make sense of the experience of limerence. He has blogged at Livingwithlimerence.com for seven years under the pseudonym "Dr L" but has now decided to step out of the shadows with the publication of a new book "Smitten" that summarizes everything he's learned about limerence over the years.

Text source