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Episodes: The True Story of Two Friends & One Diagnosis
In Episodes, lifelong best friends Kat and Mara take listeners on an unfiltered journey through friendship, mental illness, and survival. Kat, a successful professional, is preparing for marriage and motherhood. On her fourth round of IVF, it happened—a frantic call to Mara. Mara comes over to find Kat, her friend of 25 years—the one who'd always been levelheaded, hilarious, and over-the-top thoughtful—trying to jump through a window.
The unexpected Bipolar diagnosis sends Kat’s life into a tailspin, leading to frantic 9-1-1 calls, cycling in and out of hospitals, crashed cars, emptied bank accounts, and, eventually, a desperate search and rescue mission in Mexico, where Kat goes missing.
Told through their own voices, Episodes captures the profound intimacy and tension of a friendship tested by crisis. Using real-time audio to immerse listeners in their heart-wrenching saga, Episodes takes us deep into the taboo of losing one's mind and raises universal questions about the boundaries of friendship. In spite of the chaos, Kat and Mara are here to tell their story, together—a testament that not only is healing possible, but that it’s not meant to be done alone.
The unexpected Bipolar diagnosis sends Kat’s life into a tailspin, leading to frantic 9-1-1 calls, cycling in and out of hospitals, crashed cars, emptied bank accounts, and, eventually, a desperate search and rescue mission in Mexico, where Kat goes missing.
Told through their own voices, Episodes captures the profound intimacy and tension of a friendship tested by crisis. Using real-time audio to immerse listeners in their heart-wrenching saga, Episodes takes us deep into the taboo of losing one's mind and raises universal questions about the boundaries of friendship. In spite of the chaos, Kat and Mara are here to tell their story, together—a testament that not only is healing possible, but that it’s not meant to be done alone.
Audible Audio
Published November 14, 2024
4 people are currently reading
35 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews
December 19, 2024
Wow. If you want to understand Bipolar Disorder and/or mania/psychosis better, this is a must read. Don’t get me wrong it’s hard to read (listen, as I think it’s an audible exclusive?) but it’s so educational and it will help you understand. Mania is scary and you can begin to understand it with this one, you get the first person point of view and the friends point of view and wow. A heavy, but powerful listen for sure.
January 14, 2025
Audible book: This books was intense to listen to and it definitely gives a deep understanding of bipolar disorder and how it affects the person and the people around them. As someone with mental health issues, I felt for both Mara and Kat in different ways. Their friendship has managed to navigate through one of the most challenging periods of both their lives but it does show what a difference it makes to be surrounded by loving and supportive people. I have to give a big shout out to also Kat’s Dave for not giving up on her.
This book does have a lot of TW which some might find very difficult to read/listen to. TW: mental health, domestic violence, rape, physical abuse, medical content.
This book does have a lot of TW which some might find very difficult to read/listen to. TW: mental health, domestic violence, rape, physical abuse, medical content.
January 14, 2025
This was excellent. You should definitely add this to your TBR now. I genuinely appreciate these two women sharing their struggles. The friendship they share is so special and truly sacred. Things could have ended far differently for Kat without Mara and her extended support network. I typically prefer physical texts to audiobooks, but this audible original is absolutely worth listening to. Please listen to it.
While my mania was more mild, I felt the pain of lost friendships due to mental illness. It's definitely painful and reaffirms the belief of worthlessness.
While my mania was more mild, I felt the pain of lost friendships due to mental illness. It's definitely painful and reaffirms the belief of worthlessness.
December 27, 2024
Essential and oh so readable story about what it truly means to live with bipolar! Bravo Kat and Mara for being you through and through: both of your voices shining bright!
Since bipolar often manifests with rapid speech, the Audible version of this book is a true gem as it contains real audio clips, voicemails etc which really complement the story in the most heartfelt way.
Please know that the courage it took for both of you to write this wonderful testimonial really moved me as it echoed so much lived experiences and I am sure your story will help countless people living with bipolar or caring for people living with bipolar. Thankful to both Mara and Kat for taking stigma head on🫶
Since bipolar often manifests with rapid speech, the Audible version of this book is a true gem as it contains real audio clips, voicemails etc which really complement the story in the most heartfelt way.
Please know that the courage it took for both of you to write this wonderful testimonial really moved me as it echoed so much lived experiences and I am sure your story will help countless people living with bipolar or caring for people living with bipolar. Thankful to both Mara and Kat for taking stigma head on🫶
January 29, 2025
Audible. This book was narrated by the authors, Mara Altman and Kat Alexander. They’re best friends.
If you have witnessed a loved one in an acute psychotic episode, you know it’s essential to find some patterns in their behavior, in their thinking, and in their experience of their choices or lack of choices, because not only is it likely the psychosis will happen again, but it’s likely part of a larger psychological picture that includes ACE (Adverse Childhood Experiences) and potentially another more all consuming diagnosis or disease.
These women narrated their story with Kat speaking for herself, speaking about herself, during the lead up to her first psychotic episode, during subsequent breaks over the course of four years, during deep dark rebound depressions, and during weeks of frantic manic escape in which she lost all perspective, all ability to judge what was real and what was important. Kat was a danger to herself, cut off from reality, not capable of keeping track of IDs and money, losing phones, ending up naked with blistered feet from walking around barefoot, and battling hallucinations and delusions. Because Kat actually had a support system, she was eventually able to achieve insight about what was happening to her thinking and behavior during manic (psychotic) episodes. This is an incredibly difficult process and it’s usually time consuming. People need patient and reasonable loved ones to kind of orchestrate the process. Usually theres a lot of just waiting as time and further breaks can help demonstrate what is going on and what solutions are available.
Mara narrates her views during these moments, during the ER visits, during the time spent figuring out how to affect a treatment course for Kat, during her doubts that their friendship would survive. This is the best description of psychosis I’ve ever read. That Kat is capable of describing and telling what it’s like to not know you’re manically losing your own story, your own life, and potentially relationships with it, is invaluable for mental health professionals and caregivers and loved ones. Hardly anyone hangs in with psychosis. Friends bolt. Parents grow exponentially exhausted. Doctors are burned out or just never were dedicated to any form of humanism in their approach to people with psychosis as a part of their life, their nervous system, their diagnosis.
Mara and several other people in Kat’s orbit do what most people do not-they understood that Kat’s psychosis (Bi Polar I) was not her. They understood that some of the things she said, most of which she didn’t remember, were not her fault. They worked to keep boundaries and to hold empathy and sympathy. They took advantage of the only supports we have for psychosis. And after an absolutely astounding round of episodes that only people involved with someone with psychosis could understand without an extensive and detailed description and retelling, Kat finally came around too. This is rare, I think, but I don’t have the numbers to back that up.
Loved ones quit on their family members or love interests. They don’t understand. They lack financial and emotional support. The chaos can be too much and family systems break. Mara, Kat’s best friend, is unique in her stayability. This book is worth listening to for the strategies Mara uses, for the techniques she lists in tracking a loved one through ER visits, 5150 holds, medication adjustments, and manic whirlwinds.
The format is remarkably simple and successful, both women narrating alternatively every single interaction and all the details of Kat’s episodes and Mara’s responses. They used media as well. Hearing audio of Manic Kat (video too) versus Regular Kat, is way more effective than just words. This is recommended reading for anyone already practicing in mental health, for every caregiver, for every ER worker, and for every person living with psychosis who is ready to see that insight can come. It CAN take root. It takes a tremendous amount of vulnerability, resilience and resources, but it can come.
If you have witnessed a loved one in an acute psychotic episode, you know it’s essential to find some patterns in their behavior, in their thinking, and in their experience of their choices or lack of choices, because not only is it likely the psychosis will happen again, but it’s likely part of a larger psychological picture that includes ACE (Adverse Childhood Experiences) and potentially another more all consuming diagnosis or disease.
These women narrated their story with Kat speaking for herself, speaking about herself, during the lead up to her first psychotic episode, during subsequent breaks over the course of four years, during deep dark rebound depressions, and during weeks of frantic manic escape in which she lost all perspective, all ability to judge what was real and what was important. Kat was a danger to herself, cut off from reality, not capable of keeping track of IDs and money, losing phones, ending up naked with blistered feet from walking around barefoot, and battling hallucinations and delusions. Because Kat actually had a support system, she was eventually able to achieve insight about what was happening to her thinking and behavior during manic (psychotic) episodes. This is an incredibly difficult process and it’s usually time consuming. People need patient and reasonable loved ones to kind of orchestrate the process. Usually theres a lot of just waiting as time and further breaks can help demonstrate what is going on and what solutions are available.
Mara narrates her views during these moments, during the ER visits, during the time spent figuring out how to affect a treatment course for Kat, during her doubts that their friendship would survive. This is the best description of psychosis I’ve ever read. That Kat is capable of describing and telling what it’s like to not know you’re manically losing your own story, your own life, and potentially relationships with it, is invaluable for mental health professionals and caregivers and loved ones. Hardly anyone hangs in with psychosis. Friends bolt. Parents grow exponentially exhausted. Doctors are burned out or just never were dedicated to any form of humanism in their approach to people with psychosis as a part of their life, their nervous system, their diagnosis.
Mara and several other people in Kat’s orbit do what most people do not-they understood that Kat’s psychosis (Bi Polar I) was not her. They understood that some of the things she said, most of which she didn’t remember, were not her fault. They worked to keep boundaries and to hold empathy and sympathy. They took advantage of the only supports we have for psychosis. And after an absolutely astounding round of episodes that only people involved with someone with psychosis could understand without an extensive and detailed description and retelling, Kat finally came around too. This is rare, I think, but I don’t have the numbers to back that up.
Loved ones quit on their family members or love interests. They don’t understand. They lack financial and emotional support. The chaos can be too much and family systems break. Mara, Kat’s best friend, is unique in her stayability. This book is worth listening to for the strategies Mara uses, for the techniques she lists in tracking a loved one through ER visits, 5150 holds, medication adjustments, and manic whirlwinds.
The format is remarkably simple and successful, both women narrating alternatively every single interaction and all the details of Kat’s episodes and Mara’s responses. They used media as well. Hearing audio of Manic Kat (video too) versus Regular Kat, is way more effective than just words. This is recommended reading for anyone already practicing in mental health, for every caregiver, for every ER worker, and for every person living with psychosis who is ready to see that insight can come. It CAN take root. It takes a tremendous amount of vulnerability, resilience and resources, but it can come.
January 20, 2026
Whoa. I had not read ANYTHING about this book before starting it. It highlights unrelenting loyalty throughout a friendship spanning several decades. It covers the actual emotional, physical, and psychological twisted, out-of-control rollercoaster ride of woman living the nightmare of infertility when all she wants more than anything is to be pregnant. The format of the story is a volley between the two friends relaying their perspectives of the chaos that ensues when the one friend—after going through FOUR rounds of infertility treatments, hormones/harvesting/implants/waiting—experiences the sudden onset of psychosis as her body and mind simultaneously succumb to exhaustion. The writing helps the reader understand how mania completely takes control and jumps in the driver’s seat of it’s host, and without warning or caution the mania is practically determined to destroy every relationship, financial responsibility, business/employment commitment by setting out on an adventure of risks with no recognition of and no ability to determine possible consequences of bad behaviors. It’s a true story with a tornado of episodes that can absolutely happen to any one of us, our family members, friends, neighbors, etc. But who is strong enough to endure the chaos and guide that person back to themselves? Very few.
February 5, 2025
I really cannot say enough wonderful things about this book. It is such an incredible story of a woman’s journey and her best friend who was by her side through it all. The narrative style of this book is powerful and unique. It’s read by both authors and their love for each other so clearly comes across. Listening to it filled my heart with love. They also include audio clips from their journey together to create a recording that is vibrant and alive.
There are also parts of this book that are very heavy, and they are handled with care. This book is special in providing two very different realities and experiences of the same events. This reflection of a mental health journey is unmatched in any other book I’ve read. This is a narrative that builds understanding and compassion and should be read by all!
There are also parts of this book that are very heavy, and they are handled with care. This book is special in providing two very different realities and experiences of the same events. This reflection of a mental health journey is unmatched in any other book I’ve read. This is a narrative that builds understanding and compassion and should be read by all!
January 28, 2025
Fortunately, neither my family nor my close friends have experienced cases of psychosis or severe mental illnesses. I can only imagine how incredibly exhausting it must be—both for the person going through it, especially during moments of clarity when they realize what happened, and for their family, who may eventually feel completely overwhelmed.
Perhaps that’s why this audiobook didn’t resonate with me. While I can appreciate its value, it didn’t capture my interest or evoke empathy in my case.
Perhaps that’s why this audiobook didn’t resonate with me. While I can appreciate its value, it didn’t capture my interest or evoke empathy in my case.
April 3, 2025
Such a great audio book, read by the two authors, with flashback voicemails that take you right into the mindset and experience of both friends. The sudden onset of a personality disorder tests their friendship and gives the reader an intimate look at what it’s like to be driven by the compulsions of another side of us we can’t control, and how it’s possible to support someone experiencing this. It’s a harrowing journey that leaves you breathless and also wondering how things are going now. Beautiful, honest writing. Wonderful audio.
Read
April 4, 2025it’s raw and messy in the best ways, because real life, especially when dealing with mental illness, is messy. it doesn’t just explore bipolar disorder, but also what it means to truly show up for someone. the sacrifice, the doubt, the fear and the way friendship can be both a lifeline and a pressure cooker. for anyone who's ever struggled with mental health or supported someone through it, this story rings painfully true.
May 9, 2025
This was such an eye opening looking at bipolar and what mania can look like. I have more empathy for people with it after hearing this story. I loved how it was both the person who has bipolar and her supportive friend telling the story. You get a better understanding of both sides of what happens in an episode. Thank you for sharing your story and being open and vulnerable so we( the readers/listeners) can understand situations like this so much better.
Read
August 24, 2025This is more memoir than how-to and it offered a really up close look at Bipolar 1 and manic episodes. It was very unsettling to listen to lots of recordings and first person narration of psychotic episodes but I am massively impressed at the love and support friendship can provide in the midst of chaos. I think it was incredibly compassionately written and did take a good stab at the stigma of mental illness.
October 17, 2025
3.5. Audiobook only available on Audible
Having a family member with bipolar, who was hospitalized numerous times, I view this story as an extreme case of untreated mental illness.
My hope is those who listen to this example recognize a bipolar diagnosis does not have to look like this. This story supports the need for timely and quality mental health care. I hope the story does not increase the stigma of mental illnesses.
Having a family member with bipolar, who was hospitalized numerous times, I view this story as an extreme case of untreated mental illness.
My hope is those who listen to this example recognize a bipolar diagnosis does not have to look like this. This story supports the need for timely and quality mental health care. I hope the story does not increase the stigma of mental illnesses.
January 25, 2025
This is what a memoir should be! Honest and vulnerable. I feel so grateful to the writers to have share their experiences with bipolar disorder from both the perspective of person going through the episodes of mania and depression, but also through the lenses of the support system around that person.
January 29, 2026
An utterly compelling memoir of mental illness, alternating the perspectives of the person who experienced severe manic episodes and a devoted friend who was trying desperately to help them. Written for the audiobook format and read by the authors, it also incorporates audio documents (voice mail messages, video clips) from the episodes being recounted.
February 19, 2026
Excellent, but potentially triggering to those who have lived through a similar scenario. This is a bold, unfiltered look at the experience of bipolar disorder told through the medium of a love story between friends. It is great example of what not only those who have bipolar disorder go through, but what everyone around them does as well.
January 18, 2025
This book is absolutely amazing. The two go into depth of their experience of bipolar, one with bipolar, and one as the support person. They show the good and bad of bipolar, but were able to show how beautiful their friendship is. If you want a better understanding of bipolar I recommend listening to this.
December 18, 2024
I really liked this book! Having a few relatives with bipolar disorder, it was really interesting to see the episodes through the eyes of the person going through it
December 23, 2024
A rollercoaster of manic episodes, unbreakable friendships, love, laughter, sweat & tears. Highly recommended!
December 26, 2024
Fantastic memoir. Captivating.
December 29, 2024
This book really hit home. My Mom was diagnosed with bipolar over 30 years ago. I loved the way the authors shared each of their perspectives, taking you on the journey with them.
January 4, 2025
Listened to this one on Audible! So goood!
January 5, 2025
Excellent read for mental health practitioners.
March 20, 2025
A bit of a hard listen, but necessary. Was an insight into what a person having bipolar disorder experiences during mania and how it affects the people closest to them.
March 28, 2025
This both pissed me off in so many ways but also had me mournful with sorrow for Kat. What a memoir.
April 8, 2025
It was scary! People with these mental disorders are in our lives everyday. Listened on audio and it was very difficult to hear recorded conversations.
July 15, 2025
4.5 ⭐️
This was literally like looking through a looking glass and such a great view into Bipolar 1 disorder and mania. It was heartbreaking and beautiful.
This was literally like looking through a looking glass and such a great view into Bipolar 1 disorder and mania. It was heartbreaking and beautiful.
August 21, 2025
Really interesting and appreciated the love and different perspectives.
August 24, 2025
A raw, honest account of a woman and her best friend’s struggle with bipolar disorder- a mental illness that is often misunderstood and completely unimaginable. Very well done
Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews