Midnights With You is a heart-achingly beautiful debut. I read this across three sittings, and I was blown away by not just Clare’s ability to weave a cast of real and raw teenage characters, but also by her writing. I was fully immersed in Deedee’s head from page 1, feeling her emotions, her awkwardness, her trauma, and her desires with her.
What I especially loved about the book is how none of the characters are all good or all bad, but layered, and humanly flawed. I dove into this expecting a romantic road-trip story, but ended up feeling gutted (in a good way). Deedee and Jay are both such complex characters, and I was blown away by how REAL Clare made them feel, like I could reach through the pages and touch them, like they exist in some part of the world. I seldom come across YA books that so impeccably portray the complex dimensions of the teenage mind, and this one had some of the best characters developments and arc resolutions I’ve seen in a long, long while.
There were so many moments that I found myself feeling frustrated by the characters’ actions, and mind you, these two teens, while in love, weren’t perfect for each other. So often, media makes us feel as if a romantic relationship will magically cure all of our problems for us, but MWY dismantled exactly that. The lesson that the main character eventually learns is that Jay and her whirlwind romance with him isn’t going fix her life, and she’s going to have to attempt to do it herself if she wants a fruitful and long-lasting relationship with Jay.
Spoiler: The ending was PERFECT. It took them both years to heal from their trauma and put their lives into perspective and settle their issues with their families, and I love and appreciate how Clare took the narrative decision for them to wait to be with each other. So many times people get into relationships when they’re not ready yet, in the process of putting their own pieces back together, thinking a relationship will fix them, developing this toxic co-dependency that can only be further damaging to their psyche. I’m so glad Deedee and Jay took time apart and found their way back to each other (though I admit when I read the part about Jay seeing someone else I screamed at my Kindle in frustration).
And oh, Jay! When I went into this book, I was expecting him to be a dreamy, rose-coloured love interest that you see so often in teen novels, ones that can seemingly do no wrong. But he was…gosh! He was vulnerable and beautifully written, and while he wasn’t always good for Deedee, his growth and willingness to change and accept responsibility for his actions helped me see him as his own person rather than just a love interest for Deedee. Their romance was tense, electric, and poignant, and I felt every push and pull in their relationship.
I spent so much of the book being annoyed with Deedee’s mom, and I do still stand by the fact that there are a lot of parents who aren’t good parents and/or ready to be parents and that results in their children having traumatic childhoods. I was so ready to villainise Deedee’s mom…but yet again, Clare showed us the truth behind the person she was, what made her the way she was, and made us empathise even with her. I don’t know how she did it, but that’s what makes this book all the more special.
As for Suzy, at first, I wasn’t sure what to feel about her, but I was struck and touched by how good of a friend she was, and pleased by the narrative priority that was given to her friendship with Deedee rather than dismissing her as just that side character best friend. I adored Suzy so much.
The setting descriptions were brief and beautiful, and every detail, down to the tiniest thing, was written from Deedee’s view, so I didn’t feel an unnatural break in the prose at any point. There were instances where Clare could’ve easily taken a deep-dive into describing say, New York, and the Met, but she chose to instead make us experience these places through Deedee’s eyes and emotions, which I loved.
It’s been so long since I read a gutting YA book like this, with diaspora feels and mental health, and paired with the road trip motif I love most? I’m so grateful to have experienced this stunning book.