Helping Your Kids Know God's Good Design: 40 Questions and Answers on Sexuality and Gender

by Elizabeth Urbanowicz

Discipling Your Child One Conversation at a TimeIn today’s pervasively secular culture, it’s more essential than ever to guide your children toward a biblical worldview on all issues―including the complex topics of sexuality and gender. But as a parent, how do you have these discussions in an informed, age-appropriate, and Christ-centered way? This how-to handbook equips you to talk about sex, gender, and the Bible with children between the ages of 4 and 12 with confidence and nuance. Inside you’ll find biblically grounded answers to some of Christian parents’ most common questions, includingWhen should I first have the sex talk with my child?How do I explain sexual sin to my child?How do I teach my child to love others without affirming another person’s sin?How do I talk with my child about what the Bible teaches about same-sex relationships?How do I handle the fear that I’ll have these conversations the wrong way?
Discover the tools you need to disciple your child with purpose and grace! Helping Your Kids Know God’s Good Design is a thoughtful, timely, and practical resource that will coach you through some of the most foundational conversations you can have with your children.

Genres: Parenting, Christian

240 pages, Paperback

Published October 7, 2025

Reviews

[Michaela (Reading in the Heartland) · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great resource! Designed for parents of children ages 4-12, this book is organized in short chapters that all center around different aspects of sexuality and gender and how to approach conversations with your kids from a Biblical perspective. This resource always has us going to the Bible with our kids first, but also gives ways to phrase things that are age appropriate. There are numerous times that things are sectioned out on how to differently word things for kids under 8 versus for older kids. This is a resource that I am going to immediately start right back at the beginning with my kiddos. I wish I had this resource when my first child was 3! My only complaint is that she mentions multiple times how we should instruct our kids not to point out the sin in others. I'm reminded of the Bible verse about "out of the mouths of babes." I don't really agree with the idea that only adults can hold other people accountable (my children point out where I fall short at times and it is a great teaching experience for us). However, there is so much other good in this book and everything is so well written and organized.

I received an ARC of this book from the publisher and am voluntarily leaving an honest review.

[Laurel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Truly a solidly helpful book about discussing sexuality and gender with your children. Elizabeth consistently reminds us that God’s good design is best and this is an essential catechesis for our children to understand. I wish I had this years ago when I was gathering resources for this topic!

[Melissa Stearns · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent book from Elizabeth Urbanowicz! Her podcast and blog have been a blessing to me for years, so it is exciting that all of her work is compiled in this accessible book! The format is very straightforward with a question and answer for each chapter. I appreciate her verbiage and wisdom for explaining sex at different ages, and I love how she recommends teaching children to renew their minds with simple catechism-like statements when they encounter deviations from God’s good design. Elizabeth is an excellent teacher, and I’m so thankful for the help I’ve received from her wisdom!

[Jo · Rating 1 out of 5]

A sacrilegious political screed that seeks to paint modern anti-LGBT values as “biblical” in order to whitewash their own ideology. This is propaganda designed to destroy families and turn children into automatons.

[Kait · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simply put, I loved this book and took copious notes. Think it will be a big help in my parenting.

[Lisa Lynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

While I don’t necessarily agree with the author on all her points, this would be a great starting place for parents who feel overwhelmed by the idea of these discussions.

[Kelly · Rating 3 out of 5]

Overall a solid resource, but the content is quite repetitive and high-level, and I was surprised some topics and resources weren't included.

Most chapters begin by highlighting "God's good design", and also, quite a few chapters address fears and anxieties about having conversations with your kids, both of which have been condensed into more focused chapters, respectively; also, many "questions" are very similar, whereas I would have preferred if the chapters were consolidated so the "answers" were more thorough and in-depth (better examples, scripts, and nuanced scenarios especially).

There were some questions that seemed less pertinent or more subjective (such as modesty), and on the other hand, quite a few that seem relevant or "basic" but were not addressed (such as when someone has a baby if unmarried or in a gay relationship; remarriage and blended families; and guiding children if their friend's parents are going through a divorce, or in a gay relationship).

Lastly, it would be helpful to include an index, topical Bible verses list, recommended resources, and/or quick reference guide for scripts. This more practical content is buried!

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall, it was helpful with telling me how to talk about sex with my kids biblically but I felt some of it to be kind of legalistic. I felt there were a couple chapters where she presented her opinions as biblical facts.

[John Shaw · Rating 1 out of 5]

Alternate title
"How To Brainwash Your Child To Be A Hateful Religulous Cunt"

FFS
Awful people are already bad enough.
Do they really need a how to?

[Nala Tourmaline · Rating 1 out of 5]

I’m sorry it’s sinful to use euphemisms and slang words for body parts? Even the Bible uses euphemisms for such things. And don’t even get me started on her going on and on about “Gods good Design”