You Can't Save What Isn't There

by Paul Michael Anderson

When Cal Matheson's daughter was killed by a drunk driver, he felt he'd lost everything that mattered.

However, as he slowly begins to rebuild his life with a new home and a new job, he's given an inexplicable and supernatural opportunity--but is it to exact revenge on those he holds responsible for his loss in the most ghastly ways imaginable...or to fulfill his potential as an artist and human? And what is the cost of making the wrong choice?

This tale of rage and redemption from "the modern master of grief horror" (Laurel Hightower, Crossroads) will strike a chord with anyone who has suffered loss and felt the dark call of destructive anger.



"Anderson writes with a sure, steady hand.”

—Jack Ketchum, author of The Girl Next Door and The Secret Life of Souls



"Paul Michael Anderson’s brand of horror is as heart-stopping as it is heart-wrenching.”

—Gwendolyn Kiste, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of The Rust Maidens and Reluctant Immortals



"Paul Michael Anderson is the modern master of grief horror. You Can’t Save What Isn’t There is a scalpel-sharp and harrowing experience, propulsive in its pacing even as it cuts to your marrow. There's nothing surface level about Anderson's prose, his words a keening cry of loss and rage. Dark, poignant and heartbreakingly brutal—don't miss it."

—Laurel Hightower, author of Crossroads and The Day Of The Door





Paul Michael Anderson is the author of BONES ARE MADE TO BE BROKEN, STANDALONE, and THE ONLY WAY OUT IS THROUGH. He lives in Northern Virginia, and can be found at thenothingspace.net.

Genres: Horror

128 pages, Paperback

Published December 20, 2024

About the author

Paul Michael Anderson is the author of the novellas YOU CAN'T SAVE WHAT ISN'T THERE and STANDALONE, as well as the collections BONES ARE MADE TO BE BROKEN and EVERYTHING WILL BE ALL RIGHT IN THE END: APOCALYPSE SONGS. Find him at his website thenothingspace.net.

Reviews

[Xandriaaa 🌙🦇 · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a heartbreaking read. Definitely shows how grief can destroy you. Few quotes that sum up the story:

"But whys don't matter when you're in pain," Cal muttered. "You just want the pain to stop. Whys come after."

Grieving parents couldn’t conceive of forever, any more than a child could.

[Milt Theo · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the best grief horror books I’ve ever read; though short, it managed to upset me far more than entire novels. I read it in one sitting, completely invested in the story, right to the very end. The family dynamics, the sense of loss and the spiral of personal self-destruction, the despair, and that heart-shattering ending… Honestly, prepare yourself for some deeply upsetting moments and some visceral yet insightful scenes of painfully realistic darkness.

The author treats the main character, a divorced comic book artist, with empathy and care, but does not shy away from cruelly depicting his flaws: he’s a selfish, tough, deeply traumatized sob who almost lost everything when his young daughter died in an accident; but he’s trying to stand on his own two feet again – and then he receives a mysterious package, and his life changes radically. The supernatural twist caught me entirely unawares and I had absolutely no idea how the story would develop on account of it. It could have been a revenge or a ghost story, it might have been a dark family drama of heavy emotional horror – well, guess what, it turned out to be all of these, in the best way possible.

The book is the perfect length, the cast feels very very real, and even the supernatural elements, occasionally absurd to the point of incredulity, easily won me over and made perfect sense in the end.

Paul Michael Anderson has written a horrifying and thrilling grief horror novella, where the naked truth about long-term grief -its selfishness, its self-damaging and self-indulging character- is displayed as an accident waiting to happen: grief is the real monster of this story, and my heart bleeds for you if you feel right at home when reading it!

[Shannon · Rating 5 out of 5]

A potent examination of grief. Cal lost his young daughter months ago and has been struggling ever since. He comes to a crossroads. Can he move forward again, letting go of his anger and trying to rebuild his life, or will he remain stuck in a furious need for some kind of vengeance?

This reminded me of The Oresteia, the way revenge as a form of justice becomes cyclical, feeding upon itself, never truly bringing about any sort of resolution. The metaphor of a monster, of becoming a monster, using the tropes of the horror genre to examine Cal's grief.

Side note: I haven't had a bad read yet from anything I've received from the Cemetery Dance Paperback Club. Every one so far has been a banger.

[Aaron B · Rating 5 out of 5]

You Can't Save What Isn't There by Paul Michael Anderson from the Cemetery Dance Paperback Club is well-worth the time spent! Short at 102 pages, but devastating in tone and effect. There's many stories in the grief horror subcategory; this is a blend of supernatural response to unbearable pain and the grim reality of your own child's death. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Best wishes.

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

First things first, this cover art is stunning! That alone is worth all of the stars.

This tale of supernatural grief horror revolves around the struggles of the main character, Cal, after his daughter and her teacher are killed by a drunk driver while waiting for pickup at their elementary school. Cal is still very much reeling from her death and eagerly wants to assign blame to the people involved in the accident.

When he wakes up one morning and tries on a mysterious suit that was left on his doorstep, he discovers a power that puts him at a crossroads between overcoming his grief or seeking retribution. Throughout the story, we get to bear witness as he makes these decisions.

I won’t spoil the ending, but it definitely felt bleak at times (to be expected within the grief horror subgenre) and I liked how the author portrayed grief overall. While I often sympathized with Cal, there were also many moments where I appreciated the more irrational/angry side of grief being showcased, mainly with watching how Cal justified his actions and self-destructive behavior. I would recommend it overall!

[John Collins · Rating 4 out of 5]

The high price of grief

Paul Michael Anderson has a wonderful ability to convey pain on the page. He is able to get right in the guts of a characters suffering.
In the aftermath of listing his daughter in a senseless accident, a man goes through a horrible change.
This is a sort his grief can consume and overtake you. Heartbreaking and enraging, this one is worth your time.

[Zachary Ashford · Rating 4 out of 5]

A dark and heavy read. Enjoyed it.

[sugarnsass_reads · Rating 5 out of 5]

First off, The cover is horrifically glorious! It really drew me in! I know, I know…“you can’t (shouldn’t) judge a book by it’s cover BUT in this case…DO IT! This read left me physically and emotionally disturbed!!

You Can’t Save What Isn’t There is a grief horror novella that exquisitely relays the transformative, destructive, intense, impact of long term grief. As Calvin, whose six year old daughter is killed in a drunk driving accident; begins to move forward, he receives a package that changes his life. The author addresses the individual and collective experiences of grief in the characters. I was unapologetically dragged into the drowning depths of the cold, dark embrace of Cal’s grief, guilt, pain, and rage. The author is fearless in his expression of the muddy waters of grief, a multifaceted part, of the human condition. One of the best grief horror reads I have ever read! I highly recommend grabbing this one!

[Stephanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to Cemetery Dance for providing a review copy.

This is a book that will punch you right in the emotions. It's about a subject I hope to never experience - the loss of a child. Following along with Calvin as he sinks deeper and deeper is not an experience for the faint of heart. You Can't Save What Isn't There is a gut-wrenching meditation on the choices we make, and how grief can make monsters of us. 4.75 stars

[Peggy Denton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wow. Grief horror at its best!

[Laurel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dark, poignant and heartbreakingly brutal.

[Dan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved it. I was skeptical at first when I realized early on where the story was headed, but it becomes a sort of "slow motion trainwreck" where the outcome seems inevitable but you keep desperately hoping for something to prevent it.

Grief is one of those topics in horror that people are starting to get sick of lately. I felt like this story brought a unique perspective to that concept, focusing on the irrational anger and self-destruction that can come with it.

[PlotTwist_Addict · Rating 4 out of 5]

You Can’t Save What Isn’t There is a grief horror novella. Following along with Calvin after the loss of his child he slowly sinks deeper and deeper into his grief, this novella portrays just how intense and destructive long term grief can be on a person. The pain, guilt and anger one can feel is overwhelming