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She's Something Fancy: From a Kick-First Mentality to World Grand Champion Horse
Fancy's origin story is a blend of action, horror, and comedy, with a dash of heartwarming redemption thrown in for good measure.
Her first so-called "Colt Start" was not a "start" at all—it was more of a crash course in survival. The "training" methods could be called the unholy trinity of Pain, Fear, and Intimidation. Unsurprisingly, Fancy returned from that experience with a black belt in "farrier defense tactics," successfully launching three of them into orbit (metaphorically, but only just) and even scoring a hit on her owner's spouse. But hey, at least she was technically "rideable."
Now, enter me. At this point in my horse life, I was horseless, and Fancy’s owner graciously offered to "loan" me this firecracker of a mare. In a moment of either wild optimism or total lapse in judgment, I said, “Sure, why not?”
Cue our first arena Fancy tried to insert her body into my body. The lead rope clasp struck her head, trying to tell her to back up. Here is another human causing pain! Fancy kicked me. Normal people would have returned the "rideable" horse immediately. But I am not normal, am I? Nope. Instead, I bought her.
Things got spicier from there. Three times—yes, three—Fancy "charged" me like she was auditioning for the role of "lead villain" in a Western drama. She was determined to prove she was the boss and was doing a convincing job. But I decided I could "fix" her. Spoiler I could not. Fortunately, my farrier, a practitioner of natural horsemanship and common sense, staged an intervention. “Send her to Florida,” he said, “before she turns you into a pancake.”
Fancy ended up in Florida for her third "Colt Start," with masters of Love, Language, and Leadership. Unlike her previous experiences, this one stuck. She transformed from a wrecking ball with legs into a legitimate star. Her grand finale? Winning Reserve World Grand Champion Ranch Horse at the Missouri Fox Trotter World Show with her trainer. She had gone from outlaw to champion. Now, the fun part of the book I got Fancy back.
Fancy didn’t forget that "humans" had once been her enemies. In her mind, I—being a human—was guilty by association. Her trust did not come in a neat little box with a ribbon. No, it had to be earned one cautious step at a time.
Here’s the kicker (pun intended): Fancy “talks” to me on occasion in the book. And I also hired an animal communicator to talk to her. Fancy is a horse with dialogue. And before you raise an eyebrow, she’s not giving compliments. Expect zero words of affirmation from this mare. Fancy’s lines are sharp, witty, and cutting. Her commentary adds a whole new dimension to our wild journey together. However, Fancy was polite when talking to the Animal Communicator.
There’s laughter in every paragraph; I am not saying it is all at my expense, but it is mostly at my expense.
This story is more than a tale of a wild horse gone champion. It's about horsemanship, humor, and the unexpected paths life takes. There’s joy, there’s sorrow, and if you are paying attention, there is a healthy dose of learning woven into every chapter.
Oh, and one last thing—if you’ve ever wondered how to do Flying Lead Changes on a gaited horse, this book is for you. Fancy, queen of drama, just so happens to be a Missouri Fox Trotter who can not only gait but also execute flying lead changes with the grace of a ballerina (once she is done arguing with you, of course).
Her first so-called "Colt Start" was not a "start" at all—it was more of a crash course in survival. The "training" methods could be called the unholy trinity of Pain, Fear, and Intimidation. Unsurprisingly, Fancy returned from that experience with a black belt in "farrier defense tactics," successfully launching three of them into orbit (metaphorically, but only just) and even scoring a hit on her owner's spouse. But hey, at least she was technically "rideable."
Now, enter me. At this point in my horse life, I was horseless, and Fancy’s owner graciously offered to "loan" me this firecracker of a mare. In a moment of either wild optimism or total lapse in judgment, I said, “Sure, why not?”
Cue our first arena Fancy tried to insert her body into my body. The lead rope clasp struck her head, trying to tell her to back up. Here is another human causing pain! Fancy kicked me. Normal people would have returned the "rideable" horse immediately. But I am not normal, am I? Nope. Instead, I bought her.
Things got spicier from there. Three times—yes, three—Fancy "charged" me like she was auditioning for the role of "lead villain" in a Western drama. She was determined to prove she was the boss and was doing a convincing job. But I decided I could "fix" her. Spoiler I could not. Fortunately, my farrier, a practitioner of natural horsemanship and common sense, staged an intervention. “Send her to Florida,” he said, “before she turns you into a pancake.”
Fancy ended up in Florida for her third "Colt Start," with masters of Love, Language, and Leadership. Unlike her previous experiences, this one stuck. She transformed from a wrecking ball with legs into a legitimate star. Her grand finale? Winning Reserve World Grand Champion Ranch Horse at the Missouri Fox Trotter World Show with her trainer. She had gone from outlaw to champion. Now, the fun part of the book I got Fancy back.
Fancy didn’t forget that "humans" had once been her enemies. In her mind, I—being a human—was guilty by association. Her trust did not come in a neat little box with a ribbon. No, it had to be earned one cautious step at a time.
Here’s the kicker (pun intended): Fancy “talks” to me on occasion in the book. And I also hired an animal communicator to talk to her. Fancy is a horse with dialogue. And before you raise an eyebrow, she’s not giving compliments. Expect zero words of affirmation from this mare. Fancy’s lines are sharp, witty, and cutting. Her commentary adds a whole new dimension to our wild journey together. However, Fancy was polite when talking to the Animal Communicator.
There’s laughter in every paragraph; I am not saying it is all at my expense, but it is mostly at my expense.
This story is more than a tale of a wild horse gone champion. It's about horsemanship, humor, and the unexpected paths life takes. There’s joy, there’s sorrow, and if you are paying attention, there is a healthy dose of learning woven into every chapter.
Oh, and one last thing—if you’ve ever wondered how to do Flying Lead Changes on a gaited horse, this book is for you. Fancy, queen of drama, just so happens to be a Missouri Fox Trotter who can not only gait but also execute flying lead changes with the grace of a ballerina (once she is done arguing with you, of course).
270 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 19, 2024
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