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223 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 20, 2025
“You’re a fucking mess.”
He looks thrilled. “Am I your mess?”
My heart squeezes. “Hell yeah. All mine.”
“A brotherhood of broken men, but we help repair each other’s cracks and breaks. We put together the broken pieces and make each other whole again”
“With Stiles, I don’t have to be the best version of myself, but he makes me want to anyway because if I don’t have my shit together, I can’t help him be better.
I’m pretty sure he feels the same way about me.”
“Layers of tension float between us, so thick I can practically see them.”
“Sometimes at night when I find you in the kitchen on the floor, is this what you’re remembering?”
“Yeah,” I choke. “I can’t stand the quiet at night. I can hear them screaming, I can hear the scraping of metal and the blast. The ringing in my ears that lasted for weeks. I can smell it and feel the heat on my face again. It blocks out all of my senses and I get lost inside myself. Something about that cold, hard kitchen floor, so opposite from the hot desert sand, grounds me, brings me back to the present.”
His gaze drops to our joined hands, and he laces our fingers together. “Next time, I won’t pull you up off the floor so fast. I’ll just sit down there with you and hold your hand until it passes, until you can find your way back to me again.”
I lose the battle with my tears, and they fall hot down my cheeks. His promise—I hope that’s something he doesn’t forget. I need him to remember for next time.”
“Why did I never know about this? This is insane.”
“Isn’t it?” Mac hisses, his eyes rolling back in his head. “I love being gay with you.”