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Post-Man: Essays on Being a Neurodivergent Non-Binary Person
Intimate confessionals on contemporary masculinity and neurodivergence from a non-binary perspective
In this divisive moment in the history of gender politics, Alex Manley navigates life as a neurodivergent non-binary person and explores their dislocations from the norm.
Post-Man delves into the ways in which Manley has always felt apart, alone, and othered—how they always felt there was something wrong with them. In adulthood they came to recognize that in addition to suffering from depression, anxiety, ADHD, and possibly more, they understood themselves as existing outside the neat binary of gender that modern society imposes on us.
With this understanding of themself, Manley takes readers through the stultifying machismo of hockey culture, the improbable job of working for a men's website, the strange unpleasantness of going bald as a non-binary person, and more. Heart-wrenching and profound, Post-Man is a book that will make you reconsider your own perceptions of masculinity and manhood.
In this divisive moment in the history of gender politics, Alex Manley navigates life as a neurodivergent non-binary person and explores their dislocations from the norm.
Post-Man delves into the ways in which Manley has always felt apart, alone, and othered—how they always felt there was something wrong with them. In adulthood they came to recognize that in addition to suffering from depression, anxiety, ADHD, and possibly more, they understood themselves as existing outside the neat binary of gender that modern society imposes on us.
With this understanding of themself, Manley takes readers through the stultifying machismo of hockey culture, the improbable job of working for a men's website, the strange unpleasantness of going bald as a non-binary person, and more. Heart-wrenching and profound, Post-Man is a book that will make you reconsider your own perceptions of masculinity and manhood.
200 pages, Paperback
Published September 30, 2025
2 people are currently reading
56 people want to read
About the author
Alex Manley
6 books50 followersAlex Manley was born in Montreal/Tiohtià:ke in 1988 and has lived there ever since. They are a graduate of Concordia University's extremely cursed creative writing program; their essays, fiction and poetry have appeared in numerous print and online publications, including Maisonneuve magazine, Powder Keg, Peach Mag, Grain, Vallum, The Puritan, Carte Blanche and the Academy of American Poets Poem-a-Day feature. They were the winner of the 2012 Irving Layton Award for Fiction, and their first poetry collection, We Are All Just Animals & Plants, was published by Metatron Press in 2016.
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
November 5, 2025
Not to be too effusive on main but, uh, yeah, kinda no way around it: Alex is one of my favourite essayists of all time. This collection is a must for anyone with ADHD who likes CNF - not because the essays are about ADHD but because they so perfectly distill and reflect how ADHD thinking FEELS. Everything is intertextual; nothing is linear; nothing is ever totally resolved; tangents are not only worth exploring, but are often the path to a deeper understanding of the point. Lots to chew on here about gender, obvi, deliciously, but also a lot of really nourishing and interesting thoughts in the vein of anti-capitalism and self and work and love and, frankly, just being a Weird Little Guy (gender nonspecific). Really loved and related to this. I want more essays IMMEDIATELY but that’s not how it works. RIP. guess I’ll wait.
October 9, 2025
It was really interesting to read POST-MAN: Essays on Being a Neurodivergent Non-Binary Person by Alex Manley. I’ve read two of their other books previously and enjoyed them and I liked the honesty and insight into their distinct point of view in this book. Manley shares intimate experiences from getting bullied for their rat tail hairstyle, going viral on Twitter, and coming out as non-binary. There are interludes between each essay that reveal more interior gender thoughts. The book design really stood out with the turquoise cover and different ink opacities. Shout out to @fleckcreative for the great cover and @lowdowninsoho for the fantastic interior text design!
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Thank you to Arsenal Pulp and Serif for my review copy!
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Thank you to Arsenal Pulp and Serif for my review copy!
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October 2, 2025
For Review
September 28, 2025
Some interesting stuff and genuine insight in here, but it’s all sort of ruined by the second-to-last essay (“how to come out as nonbinary if you’re AMAB”). Victim-blaming, patriarchal drivel.
Manley says that they used to partake in behaviour that made “multiple women uncomfortable,” ultimately resulting in one of these women ending her friendship with Manley. Rather than take accountability for the fact that they behaved inappropriately, Manley says that the whole situation “smacked of gender” — that they were treated unfairly (!) because people viewed them as a man. Manley goes on to say that, if they were a woman, people would have viewed their behaviour as ‘messy’ or ‘flirty’ rather than predatory. (This isn’t implied, by the way. It’s said explicitly.)
I don’t know Alex Manley, but what I do know is this: if MULTIPLE WOMEN feel uncomfortable about someone’s behaviour, that person is likely giving them a REASON to feel uncomfortable. As a woman, the idea that those who accused Manley did so ONLY because they viewed the writer as a man is egregious, as is the notion that Manley would not have received any real criticism had they been a woman. The whole thing smacks of privilege and short-sightedness. I cannot believe that this was published, and that seemingly at no point in the process did anyone stop to think “hey—what, exactly, are we arguing here?”
The reason men are viewed as predators more often than women is because men ARE predators more often than women. And while Manley is nb, they fail to recognize or grapple with the fact that they likely WERE making women uncomfortable back when they presented as a man. Because women don’t just band together and accuse someone of something with no basis!
Save your time and your energy. Read literally anything else. Whoever the people in Manley’s essay are (the female friends who allegedly dropped Manley for no reason)… I sure hope they respond with essays of their own. I’d be far more interested in hearing what they have to say than in reading a single other thing from a misogynist who thinks being nonbinary absolves them of guilt.
Manley says that they used to partake in behaviour that made “multiple women uncomfortable,” ultimately resulting in one of these women ending her friendship with Manley. Rather than take accountability for the fact that they behaved inappropriately, Manley says that the whole situation “smacked of gender” — that they were treated unfairly (!) because people viewed them as a man. Manley goes on to say that, if they were a woman, people would have viewed their behaviour as ‘messy’ or ‘flirty’ rather than predatory. (This isn’t implied, by the way. It’s said explicitly.)
I don’t know Alex Manley, but what I do know is this: if MULTIPLE WOMEN feel uncomfortable about someone’s behaviour, that person is likely giving them a REASON to feel uncomfortable. As a woman, the idea that those who accused Manley did so ONLY because they viewed the writer as a man is egregious, as is the notion that Manley would not have received any real criticism had they been a woman. The whole thing smacks of privilege and short-sightedness. I cannot believe that this was published, and that seemingly at no point in the process did anyone stop to think “hey—what, exactly, are we arguing here?”
The reason men are viewed as predators more often than women is because men ARE predators more often than women. And while Manley is nb, they fail to recognize or grapple with the fact that they likely WERE making women uncomfortable back when they presented as a man. Because women don’t just band together and accuse someone of something with no basis!
Save your time and your energy. Read literally anything else. Whoever the people in Manley’s essay are (the female friends who allegedly dropped Manley for no reason)… I sure hope they respond with essays of their own. I’d be far more interested in hearing what they have to say than in reading a single other thing from a misogynist who thinks being nonbinary absolves them of guilt.
November 19, 2025
I'm not quite done yet but,, I'm glad I'm not the only one who, on the second to last essay, started to get really uncomfortable? it's like, girl no- if you were afab your friends wouldn't have "clapped when you got laid" after a break up when you keep hurting the feelings of at least one of the people you slept with because you find "monogamy boring" and are upset that your last partner of SEVERAL YEARS "couldn't fuck [you] right." Alex, you're right. it would have been seen as "messy" but not in a good way. being insensitive and dropping a trans woman of color who wanted to be poly with you so you could sleep with a cis white woman after this transwoman asked to be exclusive with you is VERY MESSY. if all your friends who are girls say they are uncomfortable, maybe YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR BEHAVIOR? anyone, even enby people and women can be seen as creepy, Alex. Oh and are we gunna talk about how they SLEPT WITH A CHILD (17, they were like,, 24) AND THEN EXPLOIDED THAT RELATIONSHIP FOR WRITING AWARDS?? THIS IS ADMITTED IN THE BOOK.
tldr, I was hooked from the first line of this book, but bits and pieces, culminating in the second last essay, have me flabbergasted. Alex completely misses the mark on this second last essay. sometimes YOU ARE THE PROBLEM. that just means you have to change!!! and it's ok to be wrong sometimes! Just change your behavior!! also, as someone who is monogamous, the low-key shade thrown at monogamous people throughout was somehow the least egregious thing that happens in this auto biography. sleeping with 17 year olds, blaming being seen as creepy on being perceived as a man, the list continues. I don't know Alex, but I dunno if I would want to be friends after everything I've read? is that too mean???
tldr, I was hooked from the first line of this book, but bits and pieces, culminating in the second last essay, have me flabbergasted. Alex completely misses the mark on this second last essay. sometimes YOU ARE THE PROBLEM. that just means you have to change!!! and it's ok to be wrong sometimes! Just change your behavior!! also, as someone who is monogamous, the low-key shade thrown at monogamous people throughout was somehow the least egregious thing that happens in this auto biography. sleeping with 17 year olds, blaming being seen as creepy on being perceived as a man, the list continues. I don't know Alex, but I dunno if I would want to be friends after everything I've read? is that too mean???
July 4, 2025
I feel so fucking blessed that this book exists and that I was able to write it the way I did. I hope it makes you feel something.
November 26, 2025
loved all the surprising twists and turns of these essays!
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December 14, 2025DNF
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews