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Stagehand: A Backstage Pass to my Life Stories
After my girlfriend of eighteen years dumped me, I took a look back at my life to see what made it worth moving forward. Working as a stagehand for forty years—with musicians such as Prince, Mick Jagger, Tony Bennett, and Michael Jackson, along with actors like Michelle Rodriguez and Will Smith—provided many memorable stories, as did my travels around the world scuba diving, trekking through jungles, and cycling up mountains. There's also the story of learning to be a better person and how to grow in my relationships. I never set out to write a book. I didn't consider my life to be any different from anyone else's. In the beginning, I was just keeping a journal and feeling sorry for myself after my ex left, but then I was inspired by some of the people in my life to write about my past. By the time I finished writing, I began to see that maybe my life was different—not so average.
Being a stagehand is challenging—it's hard work. It's not just a job but a way of life. Some people pass through the profession, but for us lifelong technicians, it takes dedication. Long hours, sleep deprivation, and working while sick or under unpleasant conditions are all part of the job. Most of the time, we work in the dark, in the cold, or under the broiling sun. There's a lot of crawling and climbing, a lot of lifting and pushing heavy gear. It's dangerous and dirty. You miss many milestones of family holiday gatherings, birthdays, weddings, births, and funerals. But still, I love what I do.
My values have always been a bit different. Most people want to earn a lot of money to be considered successful—own a home, have children, drive a new car, and collect lots of expensive stuff. Not me. I just wanted to work with talented and creative people, to make enough money to eat and live indoors. I wanted my life to be adventurous. I wanted to see the world. Most people told me I couldn't live this life, couldn't work the job I wanted. "What will be your fallback job? How will you make real money?" Who cares? I thought. I'll worry about that as I go! Now, more than forty years later, I have a lot of great stories about my adventures, the incredibly creative people I have met along the way, and the places I have been. I haven't become rich. I don't own an expensive home, fancy car, or many possessions; but I have lived many of the dreams I had as a child. This book is more than a collection of stories—it's a call to embrace adventure, defy societal norms, and find fulfillment in experiences rather than material success. "Stagehand" is a must-read for anyone seeking inspiration to chase their dreams, no matter how unconventional.
Being a stagehand is challenging—it's hard work. It's not just a job but a way of life. Some people pass through the profession, but for us lifelong technicians, it takes dedication. Long hours, sleep deprivation, and working while sick or under unpleasant conditions are all part of the job. Most of the time, we work in the dark, in the cold, or under the broiling sun. There's a lot of crawling and climbing, a lot of lifting and pushing heavy gear. It's dangerous and dirty. You miss many milestones of family holiday gatherings, birthdays, weddings, births, and funerals. But still, I love what I do.
My values have always been a bit different. Most people want to earn a lot of money to be considered successful—own a home, have children, drive a new car, and collect lots of expensive stuff. Not me. I just wanted to work with talented and creative people, to make enough money to eat and live indoors. I wanted my life to be adventurous. I wanted to see the world. Most people told me I couldn't live this life, couldn't work the job I wanted. "What will be your fallback job? How will you make real money?" Who cares? I thought. I'll worry about that as I go! Now, more than forty years later, I have a lot of great stories about my adventures, the incredibly creative people I have met along the way, and the places I have been. I haven't become rich. I don't own an expensive home, fancy car, or many possessions; but I have lived many of the dreams I had as a child. This book is more than a collection of stories—it's a call to embrace adventure, defy societal norms, and find fulfillment in experiences rather than material success. "Stagehand" is a must-read for anyone seeking inspiration to chase their dreams, no matter how unconventional.
526 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 4, 2025
29 people are currently reading
7 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
January 29, 2026
I didn’t expect this memoir to feel so intense. The constant movement, heavy labor, long nights, and nonstop travel really pulled me in and made me feel the physical demands of the job..
October 7, 2025
Everyday Life of a Traveling Stagehand
David H Aretsky is a stage hand and has traveled with high-end musicians like Mick Jagger, Dolly Parton, Eminem, and Tony Barnett. After his girlfriend left him for another man. First, his ex dated his roommate, Jack, and then, Daniel, and she saw another guy named Ron. Surprisingly, all of the friends, including his ex, continued to live in the same home. Sometimes, he still slept with his ex. He even took her scuba diving to Cozumel. After the treehouse was ruined, they moved into the spider house and, due to dog mess from the neighbors, moved into the kitchen house. Every day, he goes on a bike ride with his ex. He takes his ex to St. Thomas and New Zealand. Of course, as he dated more women, his ex still stays in the picture. I get the sense that he and his ex are bachelor/bachelorette for life and rely on each other.
Local events took him to the Playboy Mansion to work a tent for 1989 Don Henley's The End of the Innocence. He worked on the set of Mick Jagger. He met Eddie Van Halen. He works with Art Garfunkel, Rolling Stones, B52s, Bonnie Raitt, and Ziggy Marley. He worked with Prince and Prince's drummer Sheila E. Prince gave him a purple tambourine from the show. He worked several shows for Grammy Award winner Johnny Mathis and Dionne Warwick and Emmylou Harris. Other names were Larry Malloy, Jackie Evancho, Peabo Bryson, Frankie Avalon and Chubby Checker, Crystal Gayle, Skid Row, GWAR. The stories are star-studded and wild. He has photos with celebrities. This book is an inside view of what happens backstage. It is a must-read.
David H Aretsky is a stage hand and has traveled with high-end musicians like Mick Jagger, Dolly Parton, Eminem, and Tony Barnett. After his girlfriend left him for another man. First, his ex dated his roommate, Jack, and then, Daniel, and she saw another guy named Ron. Surprisingly, all of the friends, including his ex, continued to live in the same home. Sometimes, he still slept with his ex. He even took her scuba diving to Cozumel. After the treehouse was ruined, they moved into the spider house and, due to dog mess from the neighbors, moved into the kitchen house. Every day, he goes on a bike ride with his ex. He takes his ex to St. Thomas and New Zealand. Of course, as he dated more women, his ex still stays in the picture. I get the sense that he and his ex are bachelor/bachelorette for life and rely on each other.
Local events took him to the Playboy Mansion to work a tent for 1989 Don Henley's The End of the Innocence. He worked on the set of Mick Jagger. He met Eddie Van Halen. He works with Art Garfunkel, Rolling Stones, B52s, Bonnie Raitt, and Ziggy Marley. He worked with Prince and Prince's drummer Sheila E. Prince gave him a purple tambourine from the show. He worked several shows for Grammy Award winner Johnny Mathis and Dionne Warwick and Emmylou Harris. Other names were Larry Malloy, Jackie Evancho, Peabo Bryson, Frankie Avalon and Chubby Checker, Crystal Gayle, Skid Row, GWAR. The stories are star-studded and wild. He has photos with celebrities. This book is an inside view of what happens backstage. It is a must-read.
June 24, 2025
heartfelt journey
This book is a raw and heartfelt journey through the ups and downs of life and family. Chapter 28 stands out for me as a powerful reflection on a complicated father-son relationship marked by years of tension, distance, and unspoken hurt. As the father’s health declines, something shifts, and moments of connection start to appear in unexpected ways. One small act bringing him a pie leads to a touching breakthrough that brings comfort and healing. It’s a beautiful reminder that even in the hardest times, love can show up in the simplest gestures.
This book is a raw and heartfelt journey through the ups and downs of life and family. Chapter 28 stands out for me as a powerful reflection on a complicated father-son relationship marked by years of tension, distance, and unspoken hurt. As the father’s health declines, something shifts, and moments of connection start to appear in unexpected ways. One small act bringing him a pie leads to a touching breakthrough that brings comfort and healing. It’s a beautiful reminder that even in the hardest times, love can show up in the simplest gestures.
August 8, 2025
A Great Behind the Scenes Memoir
Stagehand is a great story following the author behind the scenes in the entertainment world. Enjoyed reading the up and downs. The stories were fascinating. Well written and easy to follow the author honest reflections on his personal struggles, as well as, his growth.
Stagehand is a great story following the author behind the scenes in the entertainment world. Enjoyed reading the up and downs. The stories were fascinating. Well written and easy to follow the author honest reflections on his personal struggles, as well as, his growth.
November 11, 2025
David H. Aretsky's "Stagehand: A Backstage Pass to My Life Stories" is a fascinating journal David wrote in seventeen months about his life. I was disappointed at the end of the book because I want to read more about his life. The first part of the book was his heart wrenching breakup with his girl-friend of eighteen years. He didn't care about making lots of money and having expensive stuff but he must have done petty good to travel to all the places he and his ex-girlfriend went to. It was all about working with talented and creative people and having unconventional adventures. Scuba diving in exotic places, cycling in different mountains, traveling the world, what a great life. He has a great way of describing his visits to Paris and other places in France, New Zealand and all the other places. David worked with many famous people that he writes about in the book and the work that he does with them. It's a great book and I enjoyed it.
January 1, 2026
A break-up of a longtime relationship inspired David to write a memoir. It's a mix of time spent with "The Ex", travels around the world, and unsurprisingly, his career backstage in the theater. I loved his honesty. He's had some wild adventures, and some hard drinking parties, and this is pretty much holds barred. The book jumps from current day to past memories, but the chapters are dated, so it makes it clear WHEN you are in his life. I also enjoyed his travels: especially to France, which is one of my favorite countries. There's a lot of name dropping in the theater parts. I found this really refreshing, as I get annoyed when an author mentions "a famous country singer" or "a popular soap actress", and leaves you frustratedly trying to guess who it might be. All in all an interesting book, and I enjoyed it.
January 27, 2026
Personal memoir
Personal memoir from a longtime stagehand who worked with major musicians and actors while living a nontraditional life. Honest, reflective, and more about life lessons, adventure, and choosing experiences over money than celebrity gossip. Feels grounded and real, especially about the sacrifices behind backstage careers
Personal memoir from a longtime stagehand who worked with major musicians and actors while living a nontraditional life. Honest, reflective, and more about life lessons, adventure, and choosing experiences over money than celebrity gossip. Feels grounded and real, especially about the sacrifices behind backstage careers
January 29, 2026
Reading this felt surprisingly immersive. From loading stages in harsh conditions to traveling nonstop, the action made the author’s life feel anything but ordinary.
January 29, 2026
The intensity comes from the work itself. You can feel the exhaustion, the pressure, and the dedication behind every show and every journey.
January 29, 2026
This book kept my attention because something was always happening, working through the night, pushing through fatigue, or moving on to the next place.”
January 29, 2026
What stood out most was how physically demanding the life is. The action isn’t exaggerated, but it’s constant, and that makes it feel real.
January 29, 2026
I found myself imagining the chaos behind concerts, the tight timelines, and the grind that never seems to stop. It made the story feel very alive.
January 29, 2026
There’s a steady intensity throughout the book. The author doesn’t glamorize the work, but you still feel the risk, strain, and commitment involved.
January 29, 2026
The action is grounded in real experiences, long hours, dangerous setups, and constant travel, which made the memoir surprisingly gripping.
January 29, 2026
I liked how the book balances reflection with movement. Just when you settle into one story, the next job, city, or challenge begins.
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews