What do you think?
Rate this book
Hold My Heart
Suffering from severe depression, Emma seeks out a serial killer who will kill her in the most gruesome way she can describe. But when she backs out of their agreement, she discovers the murderer is host to a parasitic creature from another dimension that feeds on the extremes of pleasure and pain. When the creature turns its attention to Emma, she is torn between the ecstasy of desire and guilt over her new urges. At the same time the killer, no longer protected from his memories by the creature, has to face a century of gruesome murders, including the death that started everything.
Hold My Heart is an uncompromisingly dark horror novella about desire—and the things we’ll do to get what we really want.
Praise for Hold My
"Seductive to the core. Hold My Heart is an intriguing thrill, its world tinged with noir atmosphere and a passion for grime on skin and tongues on blades. And with a creature too? This is everything you could want from a messed-up threesome."
-- Hailey Piper, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of Queen of Teeth and A Game in Yellow
Hold My Heart is an uncompromisingly dark horror novella about desire—and the things we’ll do to get what we really want.
Praise for Hold My
"Seductive to the core. Hold My Heart is an intriguing thrill, its world tinged with noir atmosphere and a passion for grime on skin and tongues on blades. And with a creature too? This is everything you could want from a messed-up threesome."
-- Hailey Piper, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of Queen of Teeth and A Game in Yellow
122 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 27, 2025
3 people are currently reading
93 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 28 of 28 reviews
October 9, 2025
A parasitic creature, called the zhelani, feeds on pleasure and pain, creates or imbeds itself into those with dark tendencies for their life’s fulfillment. Short, enjoyable novella. I look forward to more from Dae and reading her other books.
June 8, 2025
(3.5 rounder up)
P.S. While the story is told through Emma and D’s perspectives, my review centers on them through the lens of the evil that clings to them.
Meet Zhelani, a creature from the void that finds human hosts and uses them to be able to feed. His food of choice is desire, and we know that desire often takes many forms, including sex and violence. But what made this good wasn’t just the eroticism or the horror; it was how it played with human vulnerability.
Each host has their trauma, demons, obsessions, needs, and secrets. The creature doesn’t just feed; it exposes. It unravels people from the inside out, showing us what we’re willing to suffer through, what we crave, and what we think is worth living for (or dying for).
Lani [yes, I’ve called it Lani] doesn’t feel cruel exactly. It’s just doing what it does. But through its parasitic intimacy with humans, we’re forced to look at the darkest corners of ourselves… Who’s the real evil, hmm?
P.S. While the story is told through Emma and D’s perspectives, my review centers on them through the lens of the evil that clings to them.
Meet Zhelani, a creature from the void that finds human hosts and uses them to be able to feed. His food of choice is desire, and we know that desire often takes many forms, including sex and violence. But what made this good wasn’t just the eroticism or the horror; it was how it played with human vulnerability.
Each host has their trauma, demons, obsessions, needs, and secrets. The creature doesn’t just feed; it exposes. It unravels people from the inside out, showing us what we’re willing to suffer through, what we crave, and what we think is worth living for (or dying for).
Lani [yes, I’ve called it Lani] doesn’t feel cruel exactly. It’s just doing what it does. But through its parasitic intimacy with humans, we’re forced to look at the darkest corners of ourselves… Who’s the real evil, hmm?
May 12, 2025
Review originally on JamReads
Hold My Heart is a dark erotic horror novella, written by Koji A. Dae, published by Ghost Orchid Press. After reading the excellent Mazi last year and the sci-fi proposal Casual at the start of this one, I couldn't resist a new piece by Dae; what we have is a delicious and dark approach that blends together themes such as mental health, the scope of desire and a fair share of weird horror.
Severely depressed Emma meets D in the dark web, seeking for somebody that brutally kills her to make her feel something; but D is a different animal than what she expected, hosting an alien creature that feeds on extreme pleasure and pain. After backing from the agreement, the creature (zhelani) puts its eyes on Emma, looking for a host upgrade; the zhelani takes Emma into an unleashed path to her darkest desires, a path between ectasy and guilt. At the same time, D has to face a century of murders, free of the zhelani, all the guilt threatening to break his mind.
Splitting the narrative between the two characters was a risky decision, but the parallelism between Emma and D journeys works as a great narrative structure; Emma, under the zhelani influence, embracing her darker side, looking for those forbidden pleasures even if she might feel guilt after, and D, a life ruined after his encounter with the zhelani, slowly weighting all the acts he did under the zhelani control. One, in free falling to the depths of the well and the other, after has hit rock bottom.
Dae's prose is precise, kinda falling on the short side, but really effective at transmitting emotions; the blend between erotica and dark horror works marvels to deliver an astounding piece. The suspense is always kept at maximum, and while there are some gory details, it is kept in control, instead focusing more on the ideas and the feelings. (Also, again props to Dae making the effort to capture BDSM essence into her novel)
Hold My Heart is a bold erotic horror novella, perfect if you are looking for a dark proposal, intense and weird; a short but excellent bite of what the genre can offer. A recommendation if you love the genre, trust me!
Hold My Heart is a dark erotic horror novella, written by Koji A. Dae, published by Ghost Orchid Press. After reading the excellent Mazi last year and the sci-fi proposal Casual at the start of this one, I couldn't resist a new piece by Dae; what we have is a delicious and dark approach that blends together themes such as mental health, the scope of desire and a fair share of weird horror.
Severely depressed Emma meets D in the dark web, seeking for somebody that brutally kills her to make her feel something; but D is a different animal than what she expected, hosting an alien creature that feeds on extreme pleasure and pain. After backing from the agreement, the creature (zhelani) puts its eyes on Emma, looking for a host upgrade; the zhelani takes Emma into an unleashed path to her darkest desires, a path between ectasy and guilt. At the same time, D has to face a century of murders, free of the zhelani, all the guilt threatening to break his mind.
Splitting the narrative between the two characters was a risky decision, but the parallelism between Emma and D journeys works as a great narrative structure; Emma, under the zhelani influence, embracing her darker side, looking for those forbidden pleasures even if she might feel guilt after, and D, a life ruined after his encounter with the zhelani, slowly weighting all the acts he did under the zhelani control. One, in free falling to the depths of the well and the other, after has hit rock bottom.
Dae's prose is precise, kinda falling on the short side, but really effective at transmitting emotions; the blend between erotica and dark horror works marvels to deliver an astounding piece. The suspense is always kept at maximum, and while there are some gory details, it is kept in control, instead focusing more on the ideas and the feelings. (Also, again props to Dae making the effort to capture BDSM essence into her novel)
Hold My Heart is a bold erotic horror novella, perfect if you are looking for a dark proposal, intense and weird; a short but excellent bite of what the genre can offer. A recommendation if you love the genre, trust me!
April 13, 2025
Perfect horror erotica. Gore is kept at a minimum, but suspense is maintained sky-high throughout. The premise is simple: a woman craving violent death meets a serial killer, but the latter is a very different animal than he seems. The supernatural elements are well thought, and, in fact, quite eerily described. My single complaint would be about the language: it does not sound natural, a bit stilted instead. But this doesn't affect the plot or the story's resolution. Recommended!
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
May 21, 2025
suffering from severe depression Emma seeks out D, a serial killer who's agreed to kill her in the most gruesome way she can imagine. when they go to meet up Emma backs out of their agreement & we quickly learn that D is a host for an ancient parasitic creature who feeds on death & extreme levels of pain or pleasure.
this is definitely not what i was expecting to read from this little novella but it was so much fun!
there's not a whole lot i can say without spoiling it so I'll just say if you want a quick gory read with a twist on supernatural or ancient creatures this is for you. by the time i was finished i was thinking "what did i just read" but I also wanted more of the chaos!
it's weird, it's bloody & at times...kinky
Trigger Warnings; murder, gore, depression, self harm, sexual aphasia
I received an advance review copy for free from BookSirens, & I am leaving this review voluntarily
this is definitely not what i was expecting to read from this little novella but it was so much fun!
there's not a whole lot i can say without spoiling it so I'll just say if you want a quick gory read with a twist on supernatural or ancient creatures this is for you. by the time i was finished i was thinking "what did i just read" but I also wanted more of the chaos!
it's weird, it's bloody & at times...kinky
Trigger Warnings; murder, gore, depression, self harm, sexual aphasia
I received an advance review copy for free from BookSirens, & I am leaving this review voluntarily
May 26, 2025
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
🌶🌶.5
This was a great erotic horror novella. You have your two main characters, Emma & D, both wrapped up with this mystical element to their lives. I don’t want to give too much away, but in essence, these were two normal people….until they weren’t….
There were some twists to the story and how it developed was unique and refreshing. I could guess where it was going at parts, but still a great ending to a strong erotic horror.
⟣Tropes⟢
✅ Curvy FMC
✅ Dual POV’s (first person)
✅ Bløød, Gore and definitely Horror
✅ Serial Unaliver
✅ Sex clubs
***I was given this as an ARC for free and writing a review voluntary. All opinions are my own.***
🌶🌶.5
This was a great erotic horror novella. You have your two main characters, Emma & D, both wrapped up with this mystical element to their lives. I don’t want to give too much away, but in essence, these were two normal people….until they weren’t….
There were some twists to the story and how it developed was unique and refreshing. I could guess where it was going at parts, but still a great ending to a strong erotic horror.
⟣Tropes⟢
✅ Curvy FMC
✅ Dual POV’s (first person)
✅ Bløød, Gore and definitely Horror
✅ Serial Unaliver
✅ Sex clubs
***I was given this as an ARC for free and writing a review voluntary. All opinions are my own.***
April 4, 2025
This isn't your run of the mill average serial killer story. It's heartbreaking, beautiful and brutal without being explicit. It's about depression, loneliness and desire, but not in a way you'd expect. I don't want to say too much because I'll end up spoiling it, so if you want a book that will stick with you for a long time, give this a read. You won't be sorry.
April 2, 2025
Severely depressed Emma meets D on the dark web, where she seeks someone to brutally kill her so she would finally feel something. But D is not just your friendly neighborhood serial killer with a moral-ish code; he's over a hundred years old and host to an alien parasite—zhelani—who embodies and feeds on human desires (the more painful, the more delicious). At the last minute, Emma changes her mind about dying, but zhelani has met her now and itches for a host upgrade. And what zhelani wants, zhelani gets. This excellent erotic-horror novella explores the allure of depravity and human powerlessness against base impulses. The book can be viewed as a metaphor for addiction, and shows what it means to be newly possessed versus completely hollowed out by a lifetime of not being in control of oneself. It is very well written, with a fast pace, immersive scenes, appealing atmosphere, and sharp imagery. Hot, horny, and horrifying, the novella drips with bodily fluids and purple alien ooze. Highly recommended.
I received an advance review copy for free from BookSirens, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free from BookSirens, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
May 2, 2025
3.25
Ah I'm really struggling with reviewing and rating this.
The premise is so good! As is the aesthetic and plot.
I even mostly liked the characters and the way they got roped into this.
For some reason, while I know horror demands no resolved ending or explanation for all details, this book still left me a bit unsatisfied. I think, in a book of this length (or any book, really), I need every info to be partial and while the MMCs POV did give important insight and background information, I don't know if I loved this choice since, apart from that, his present story as well as the detailed depicting of his personal life 'before' didn't feel all that necessary.
The writing itself was good and the characters and their developments were well crafted. I liked the way the Zhelani interacted with and influenced each of them.
Overall, it was a quick, intriguing read with a good level of horror for me personally. And I very much liked the Zhelani as the entity at the core of this book.
I received an ARC of this book and am leaving a voluntary and honest review
Ah I'm really struggling with reviewing and rating this.
The premise is so good! As is the aesthetic and plot.
I even mostly liked the characters and the way they got roped into this.
For some reason, while I know horror demands no resolved ending or explanation for all details, this book still left me a bit unsatisfied. I think, in a book of this length (or any book, really), I need every info to be partial and while the MMCs POV did give important insight and background information, I don't know if I loved this choice since, apart from that, his present story as well as the detailed depicting of his personal life 'before' didn't feel all that necessary.
The writing itself was good and the characters and their developments were well crafted. I liked the way the Zhelani interacted with and influenced each of them.
Overall, it was a quick, intriguing read with a good level of horror for me personally. And I very much liked the Zhelani as the entity at the core of this book.
I received an ARC of this book and am leaving a voluntary and honest review
May 28, 2025
This book was such a great quick read- perfect for those looking for a quick suspenseful, horror, sci-Fi based book.
We first meet Emma, who basically hires someone to un-alive her. She meets up with a serial un-aliver, Daniel or D, changes her mind about the deal and D takes her back to his place. Things get sexy instead of deadly, although physically you can see D at war with himself. He lets Emma go, however she wants more.
Just before she leaves she witnesses something unearthly, but this doesn’t stop her from wanting more. D is not what he seems and has many secrets- one that controls him body and soul.
Although this book was amazing- I really wish it defined when the point of view changed. You can tell the point of view changes because Emma seems to live a more “normal” day to day life and D‘s chapters are more unhinged
*I received a free copy of this book via Booksirens in exchange for my honest review*
We first meet Emma, who basically hires someone to un-alive her. She meets up with a serial un-aliver, Daniel or D, changes her mind about the deal and D takes her back to his place. Things get sexy instead of deadly, although physically you can see D at war with himself. He lets Emma go, however she wants more.
Just before she leaves she witnesses something unearthly, but this doesn’t stop her from wanting more. D is not what he seems and has many secrets- one that controls him body and soul.
Although this book was amazing- I really wish it defined when the point of view changed. You can tell the point of view changes because Emma seems to live a more “normal” day to day life and D‘s chapters are more unhinged
*I received a free copy of this book via Booksirens in exchange for my honest review*
May 10, 2025
Emma wants to die but not quietly, she wants to feel each gruesome cut and she has found a serial killer who will do this to her. When she changes her mind she discovers the murderer is hosting a parasite that feeds on extremes of pain and pleasure.
A fascinating horror with themes of depression, thrill seeking and regret. Emma wants to feel something, anything and even her experiences in the dark underbelly of the city no longer help. The killer has been feeding the parasite for over a hundred years and needs it or he remembers all the death and destruction he has inflicted and it makes his soul burn.
A stark look at the consequences of desire as the parasite hooks onto Emma leaving the killer alone with his memories. Such a unique horror, it has explicit and gory content so bear that in mind.
A fascinating horror with themes of depression, thrill seeking and regret. Emma wants to feel something, anything and even her experiences in the dark underbelly of the city no longer help. The killer has been feeding the parasite for over a hundred years and needs it or he remembers all the death and destruction he has inflicted and it makes his soul burn.
A stark look at the consequences of desire as the parasite hooks onto Emma leaving the killer alone with his memories. Such a unique horror, it has explicit and gory content so bear that in mind.
June 17, 2025
I really did enjoy this bizarre quick read, and the plot had me hooked from the very beginning. The mystery of where the story was going to take me really made me want to keep reading! 👀
I’d describe this as a dark, erotic horror with a supernatural twist. It does have some gore in it but the darkness of the story trumps the level of gore. I would recommend you check all TWs before reading though, since there’s plenty of heavy subjects that could be triggering. 🫶🏻
I do appreciate a dual POV in a book, and I think the author really made the story come together by using the dual POV in a clever way. Tiny detail: I would’ve preferred if the chapters were named instead of just numbered, it would make it easier to keep track of who’s chapter and POV you’re reading.
(I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily).
I’d describe this as a dark, erotic horror with a supernatural twist. It does have some gore in it but the darkness of the story trumps the level of gore. I would recommend you check all TWs before reading though, since there’s plenty of heavy subjects that could be triggering. 🫶🏻
I do appreciate a dual POV in a book, and I think the author really made the story come together by using the dual POV in a clever way. Tiny detail: I would’ve preferred if the chapters were named instead of just numbered, it would make it easier to keep track of who’s chapter and POV you’re reading.
(I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily).
April 17, 2025
This was a pretty good book! The first half of it really brought me in. I think that it is well written and the concept is very interesting. I really liked the ending! It felt like a good way to get around a potential problem for the main character. What made it 3 stars for me was that once the climax was reached, it felt like the author wasn't interested in the story anymore. It got a pretty boring. Also, I went into this thinking it was a dark romance and it definitely was not. That could totally have been me misunderstanding the description though! Overall, it was a decent, easy read.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
April 25, 2025
I received an advance review copy for free from Booksirens.com, and I am leaving this honest review voluntarily.
Hold My Heart was a fantastic novella. Horror, erotica, serial killers, and mental health topics all packed together in a beautiful way. Dark prose and heavy themes make this a standout book.
Everything feels well thought out and described wonderfully. You feel for/relate to the characters while at the same time you're horrified by their actions and what's happening to them. I wish it was longer because I really enjoyed reading it but nothing more was necessary.
This is a killer read (no pun intended) and I would absolutely recommend it.
Hold My Heart was a fantastic novella. Horror, erotica, serial killers, and mental health topics all packed together in a beautiful way. Dark prose and heavy themes make this a standout book.
Everything feels well thought out and described wonderfully. You feel for/relate to the characters while at the same time you're horrified by their actions and what's happening to them. I wish it was longer because I really enjoyed reading it but nothing more was necessary.
This is a killer read (no pun intended) and I would absolutely recommend it.
May 20, 2025
Oh wow I have just finished this & it was something different to what I am used too.
The plot of the story came together incredibly, you feel D’s inner thoughts & Emmas sorrow for her life.
This has the hidden depths of what it’s like to feel something is missing in your life & not knowing how to go about changing it.
And the inner demon taking over your life in the worse ways possible (in this case a murderous parasite)
This was so well written, I really enjoyed it & probs will purchase it, I would have finished sooner had it not been for work! I would give this 3.5 stars
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
The plot of the story came together incredibly, you feel D’s inner thoughts & Emmas sorrow for her life.
This has the hidden depths of what it’s like to feel something is missing in your life & not knowing how to go about changing it.
And the inner demon taking over your life in the worse ways possible (in this case a murderous parasite)
This was so well written, I really enjoyed it & probs will purchase it, I would have finished sooner had it not been for work! I would give this 3.5 stars
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
Read
June 16, 2025The story follows Emma, who becomes entwined with a mysterious creature, sparking a conflict between desire and guilt. At the same time, a killer, whose memories were suppressed by the creature, starts to relive a century of murders, including the event that began it all. As supernatural forces intertwine with psychological horror, Emma finds herself in a dark drama of desire, memory, and bloodshed.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
April 11, 2025
Wow. This definitely wasn’t what I was expecting from this book. If you love monsters, some gore, and super dark prose… then this is for you. I was morbidly fascinated and couldn’t set the book down, even though I wanted to. It’s a shorter read but it had a lot packed into it.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
May 1, 2025
ARC review
I thoroughly enjoyed reading Hold My Heart, it wasn't as horror-y as I expected which lost a star for me personally. I really loved the book from the first page it's an instant capture. It reminds me of venom but more explicit and murder-y.
Emma is relatable with her depression and just living day to day on autopilot.
I received an advanced copy for my review.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading Hold My Heart, it wasn't as horror-y as I expected which lost a star for me personally. I really loved the book from the first page it's an instant capture. It reminds me of venom but more explicit and murder-y.
Emma is relatable with her depression and just living day to day on autopilot.
I received an advanced copy for my review.
May 6, 2025
This book had definate Hellraiser vibes to it. What do you truly desire? And what are your limits between pleasure and pain?
The suffering in the book comes not only from Emma, but from the one she finds to end her life.
A must read for those into dark desire fantasy.
I received this book as an arc from Booksirens
The suffering in the book comes not only from Emma, but from the one she finds to end her life.
A must read for those into dark desire fantasy.
I received this book as an arc from Booksirens
May 18, 2025
Please check all those CW and TW before you read this one. The absolute mind trip this one but me through in its short amount of pages was wow. Kinda sat there after asking what did I just read, lol. But I could not put this one down had to find out what was going on.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
April 1, 2025
Thank you to Koji and ghost orchard press for the opportunity to read and review this ARC.
Hold my Heart is a dark horror novella expected around the 27th of May.
This novella is not for the faint of heart. I honestly don't know how to explain my feelings about this novel, only that it has been sitting with me for days. Other exciting news is my friend designed the cover!
Description:
"Hold my heart" follows Emma, suffering severe depression, who seeks out a serial killer to help her end her life. When she decides to opt out, her life takes an extraordinary and gruesome turn.
Hold my Heart is a dark horror novella expected around the 27th of May.
This novella is not for the faint of heart. I honestly don't know how to explain my feelings about this novel, only that it has been sitting with me for days. Other exciting news is my friend designed the cover!
Description:
"Hold my heart" follows Emma, suffering severe depression, who seeks out a serial killer to help her end her life. When she decides to opt out, her life takes an extraordinary and gruesome turn.
December 14, 2025
tbh I don’t have any words. jaw on the floor. not the way I was expecting this to end. it was good!!! just a little triggering for me in some parts, the content warning is at the end of the book but I knew of it before reading !!
Read
March 23, 2025RTC
April 20, 2025
Wow! What a ride!
Interesting concept, cool “villain”, unique storyline and well written characters. Had me hooked from page 1 and it reads like a train.
Definitely reccomend!
Interesting concept, cool “villain”, unique storyline and well written characters. Had me hooked from page 1 and it reads like a train.
Definitely reccomend!
April 27, 2025
Definitely strange but not a bad read. Imagination of the author to write this book is pretty wild.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
July 18, 2025
Gross beautiful scary sexy!
May 23, 2025
This short horror story grabbed my heart and kept it, dark and rippling with emotion - perfectly balanced between horror that hits with just enough rawness and character-driven depth that doesn't try too hard to be edgy. The pacing was meticulous, slowing just enough to sink in-this story knows when to give you a breather and when to pull you back in with something sharp.
August 19, 2025
This book is a dark raunch through a landscape of sex, death, and mental health. The themes are heavy, but this story could not have been told through any other means, and I for one am a fan. The prose is snappy and descriptive, which is good, but in concert with the way the author paces the forward momentum of the story, emotionally poignant. The words elicit dread, makes you aware of your own pulse as you read, anticipating turning to the next page. It is a feeling which kept me reading it from the moment I opened it--I finished it in one sitting!
There were a few missing punctuation marks that I noticed (a set of missing double-quotes on page 80), and a typo on page 79 (quit instead of "quite.") I didn't notice anything else while I was reading that stuck out to me or tripped me up while I was reading.
I'm looking forward to reading more from this author, and would love to see them push further with these topics.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
There were a few missing punctuation marks that I noticed (a set of missing double-quotes on page 80), and a typo on page 79 (quit instead of "quite.") I didn't notice anything else while I was reading that stuck out to me or tripped me up while I was reading.
I'm looking forward to reading more from this author, and would love to see them push further with these topics.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
Displaying 1 - 28 of 28 reviews