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Midlife Cabernet: Life, Love & Laughter after Fifty
Welcome to Midlife Cabernet!
This title is SO much better than the original working title of Elderly Wino. If you’re a feisty, robust female tumbling down the far side of fifty, grab a glass of cabernet (oh hell, grab the whole bottle), wear your rhinestone-studded reading glasses, and savor some witty words of wisdom:
- Enjoy midlife love, sex, and passion (with another actual, living person)
- Turn your adult children’s old room into a wine bar so they can’t move back home
- Remain confident when your boobs sway like tube socks, you’re a case study for Irritable Bowel Syndrome, and your aging parents forget your name
Yes, midlife is your reward for not dying young. So, drink it all in, Sisters! The best is yet to come.
This title is SO much better than the original working title of Elderly Wino. If you’re a feisty, robust female tumbling down the far side of fifty, grab a glass of cabernet (oh hell, grab the whole bottle), wear your rhinestone-studded reading glasses, and savor some witty words of wisdom:
- Enjoy midlife love, sex, and passion (with another actual, living person)
- Turn your adult children’s old room into a wine bar so they can’t move back home
- Remain confident when your boobs sway like tube socks, you’re a case study for Irritable Bowel Syndrome, and your aging parents forget your name
Yes, midlife is your reward for not dying young. So, drink it all in, Sisters! The best is yet to come.
226 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 19, 2014
272 people are currently reading
591 people want to read
About the author
Elaine Ambrose
25 books51 followersElaine Ambrose is an award-winning, bestselling author of 12 books, 14 eBooks, and 4 audiobooks. Her books have won 10 national writing awards in three genres: humor, memoir, and children's books. Her new children's book is titled Melody's Magical Flying Machine and features a girl with Down syndrome as the narrator. Midlife Cabernet won two national humor awards, Publishers Weekly reviewed it as “laugh-out-loud funny!” and Foreword Reviews wrote that the book was “an argument for joy” similar to Erma Bombeck. Her book, Midlife Happy Hour, was a finalist for Foreword INDIES Book of the Year and won First Place for Midlife from the Independent Publisher Award. Her memoir Frozen Dinners won Distinguished Favorite awards from the New York City Big Book Awards and from the Independent Press Awards. Her children’s book, Gators & Taters, won an award for Children’s Literature from the 2018 Independent Press Awards. Her bilingual children’s book, The Magic Potato – La Papa Mágica, was selected by the Idaho State Board of Education for the statewide curriculum. Ambrose’s award-winning syndicated blog posts are published on several websites, and one humorous post became one of the most-read posts in the history of The Huffington Post. Elaine lives with her patient husband in Eagle, Idaho.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 98 reviews
March 25, 2014
Divorce rate is on the rise and Elaine is out to prove her friends wrong by dating after 50. From kegels to grandkids, Midlife Cabernet is the perfect book for midlife and beyond. Join her as she searches for a man that laughs at her jokes and kisses her every night and morning. She shares with the reader her love of wine and backrubs on Valentine’s Day over dumb gifts like a four-foot Vermont teddy bear.
She offers useful tips for finding love after divorce at Midlife like: don’t look for it, stay healthy and exercise regularly, keep busy, avoid the temptation to settle, wear sexy panties every day and believe in yourself.
Her insightful lists like “Top Ten Reasons I Love Life After Fifty” are hilarious and relatable. Aren’t you glad you no longer have to deal with screaming kids at the mall? Wear pointy stilettos to work? Now you’re finally free to have sex with the door opened.
If you like to laugh, join Elaine as she fights “old age with the tenacity of Wonder Woman.”
She offers useful tips for finding love after divorce at Midlife like: don’t look for it, stay healthy and exercise regularly, keep busy, avoid the temptation to settle, wear sexy panties every day and believe in yourself.
Her insightful lists like “Top Ten Reasons I Love Life After Fifty” are hilarious and relatable. Aren’t you glad you no longer have to deal with screaming kids at the mall? Wear pointy stilettos to work? Now you’re finally free to have sex with the door opened.
If you like to laugh, join Elaine as she fights “old age with the tenacity of Wonder Woman.”
June 6, 2017
Meh. Nothing new was said, but some of it was said humorously enough to make me snort.
Better editing/topic organization would've been nice. It read a lot like a stream of consciousness per chapter with topics veering off all over the place. Add in carefully placed lists likely lifted straight from the author's motivational speeches and you have a bit of a clunky read.
Sadly for me, when I downloaded it I thought it was a cozy mystery with an older writer as the protagonist.
Better editing/topic organization would've been nice. It read a lot like a stream of consciousness per chapter with topics veering off all over the place. Add in carefully placed lists likely lifted straight from the author's motivational speeches and you have a bit of a clunky read.
Sadly for me, when I downloaded it I thought it was a cozy mystery with an older writer as the protagonist.
April 24, 2014
This review is from ForeWord Clarion Reviews:
Elaine Ambrose’s Midlife Cabernet: Life, Love & Laughter after Fifty is an Erma Bombeck-esque tribute to women who are over fifty and ready to explore life on new terms. It’s a humorous and sassy-yet-compassionate view of life over the hill, as well as a retrospective on the climb to the top.
In a series of themed essays in which her enjoyment of good wine is the connecting thread, Ambrose eschews ladylike censoring in her tale of life over fifty. With frank sexual references, sagging body parts, and visits to the plastic surgeon, Ambrose moves the reader from skin-deep concerns to the social and emotional challenges of working motherhood, child rearing (“It comes down to survival of the funniest”), post-career life transitions, friends with later-inlife illnesses, the richness of decades-long friendships, empty-nest syndrome, caring for older parents, and the joys and challenges of grandchildren. Through it all, Ambrose returns to the metaphor of good wine, facetious in her described devotion to celebrating the special occasions as well as the everyday: “I’ll drink fine wine if my hangnail heals.”
The writing and mechanics are solid, and the midlife focus is perfectly matched by the cover, with its antique typewriter. What is mostly a punchy and humorous series of essays—(“If you are what you eat, I’m a gigantic chocolate chip cookie floating in a vat of red wine”)—at times turns tangential, such as when, in an essay about bad investments and “avoid[ing] crooks,”
Ambrose dives into a nostalgic reflection on what she learned in English class, thanking her “heroes” (English teachers), who taught her how to diagram a sentence. Later chapters also contain lists of a mix of sensible and humorous advice for travel with grandchildren and travel alone, lists that at times lack the same energy exuded in earlier chapters.
Throughout, though, the tone is cheerful and friendly. Ambrose reads like a not-too-tired fifty-something who still has the energy to play a joke on a friend, enjoy romance with her spouse, and hop around with grandkids—appreciating life all the more when in relief against its inevitable challenges.
Midlife Cabernet is an argument for joy despite parents with dementia, grandchildren with Down syndrome, financial loss, broken relationships, and slow metabolisms: “Your challenge throughout the year is to keep the music playing. Sing and play your own songs long after the confetti is thrown into the garbage, the bills are past due, and prosperity is still elusive.” Ambrose will draw readers looking for frank conversation and a pick-me-up in the face of all the challenges midlife has to offer.
Elaine Ambrose’s Midlife Cabernet: Life, Love & Laughter after Fifty is an Erma Bombeck-esque tribute to women who are over fifty and ready to explore life on new terms. It’s a humorous and sassy-yet-compassionate view of life over the hill, as well as a retrospective on the climb to the top.
In a series of themed essays in which her enjoyment of good wine is the connecting thread, Ambrose eschews ladylike censoring in her tale of life over fifty. With frank sexual references, sagging body parts, and visits to the plastic surgeon, Ambrose moves the reader from skin-deep concerns to the social and emotional challenges of working motherhood, child rearing (“It comes down to survival of the funniest”), post-career life transitions, friends with later-inlife illnesses, the richness of decades-long friendships, empty-nest syndrome, caring for older parents, and the joys and challenges of grandchildren. Through it all, Ambrose returns to the metaphor of good wine, facetious in her described devotion to celebrating the special occasions as well as the everyday: “I’ll drink fine wine if my hangnail heals.”
The writing and mechanics are solid, and the midlife focus is perfectly matched by the cover, with its antique typewriter. What is mostly a punchy and humorous series of essays—(“If you are what you eat, I’m a gigantic chocolate chip cookie floating in a vat of red wine”)—at times turns tangential, such as when, in an essay about bad investments and “avoid[ing] crooks,”
Ambrose dives into a nostalgic reflection on what she learned in English class, thanking her “heroes” (English teachers), who taught her how to diagram a sentence. Later chapters also contain lists of a mix of sensible and humorous advice for travel with grandchildren and travel alone, lists that at times lack the same energy exuded in earlier chapters.
Throughout, though, the tone is cheerful and friendly. Ambrose reads like a not-too-tired fifty-something who still has the energy to play a joke on a friend, enjoy romance with her spouse, and hop around with grandkids—appreciating life all the more when in relief against its inevitable challenges.
Midlife Cabernet is an argument for joy despite parents with dementia, grandchildren with Down syndrome, financial loss, broken relationships, and slow metabolisms: “Your challenge throughout the year is to keep the music playing. Sing and play your own songs long after the confetti is thrown into the garbage, the bills are past due, and prosperity is still elusive.” Ambrose will draw readers looking for frank conversation and a pick-me-up in the face of all the challenges midlife has to offer.
February 14, 2015
I finished about 90% of this book. It was pretty amusing. I enjoyed it but . . . have you ever listened to a comic who did a string of one-liners and that was his whole act? Funny but it gets to be monotonous. For people who like short stories this might be just the ticket because it has the same feel as an anthology.
January 4, 2020
Good for some old-fashioned laughs
Although the author's upbringing on a rural farm was different from mine, and her career was on a different path, much of the humor was relateable. Quick, belly laughing read!
Although the author's upbringing on a rural farm was different from mine, and her career was on a different path, much of the humor was relateable. Quick, belly laughing read!
August 20, 2018
I used to think I wrote humor and comedy with panache- no more
Laugh on the couch, laugh in the chair, fall on the floor - laugh! Reading the book will cement your good and repair a bad one - read this book!
Laugh on the couch, laugh in the chair, fall on the floor - laugh! Reading the book will cement your good and repair a bad one - read this book!
January 15, 2015
Elaine was like most middle-aged divorcees, until she did the improbable: she found a good man who loved her and her kids, and married him. They're living happily ever after thanks to mutual affection, respect, dedication. And wine.
Since then she's been enjoying her 50+ years, doting on grandchildren, caring for her aging mother, writing and living with the love of her life. And drinking lots and lots of wine.
She shares her experience and advice with us in a warm, humorous fashion that's never condescending. She doesn't have all the answers. She has many of them. And many of them involve a glass of wine.
I laughed over her stories, commiserated about the worry of aging older generations, enjoyed and related to so much of what she said. And wine.
If there was a complaint to be had in her book, it's just the constant mention of wine. It's a running joke that runs a bit too long. That, and a bit of repeated stories that I think are part of the aging process. And drinking wine.
Since then she's been enjoying her 50+ years, doting on grandchildren, caring for her aging mother, writing and living with the love of her life. And drinking lots and lots of wine.
She shares her experience and advice with us in a warm, humorous fashion that's never condescending. She doesn't have all the answers. She has many of them. And many of them involve a glass of wine.
I laughed over her stories, commiserated about the worry of aging older generations, enjoyed and related to so much of what she said. And wine.
If there was a complaint to be had in her book, it's just the constant mention of wine. It's a running joke that runs a bit too long. That, and a bit of repeated stories that I think are part of the aging process. And drinking wine.
April 1, 2014
This book was one of the most funny, endearing books I've read. It's almost conversational in style and the author isn't afraid to tackle sticky subjects. (Like mistaking lubricant for massage oil). I haven't experienced divorce or menopause or grandkids, but still found the stories accessible, delightful, and yes, laugh out loud. Makes you want to spend and afternoon splitting a bottle of wine (or two) with the author. Highly recommend.
September 7, 2018
I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation - like book with author Elaine Ambrose - because that is what it felt like while reading. Ambrose doesn't hold back in telling it like it is when midlife approaches and all of our usual parts become new to us in different proportions, including parts of our lives as we once knew them. The author covers things we no longer have to worry about, and new concerns we come to realize as we age. And according to Ambrose, the only way to tackle some of these absurdities is to make sure we keep a bottle of Cabernet at hand.
The book reads more like chapters on memorable moments of past and new behaviors as she humorously learned to adapt to her life after fifty, oh, and of course her transformation and changes that took effect on her body. The author also offers anecdotes for some of the changes she encountered, offering some good advice for those who've yet to get there.
Although the book is a humorous take on midlife changes, it should still offer entertainment value to those of the younger generation who may be curious to take a sneak peek into the inevitable years of middle age.
The book reads more like chapters on memorable moments of past and new behaviors as she humorously learned to adapt to her life after fifty, oh, and of course her transformation and changes that took effect on her body. The author also offers anecdotes for some of the changes she encountered, offering some good advice for those who've yet to get there.
Although the book is a humorous take on midlife changes, it should still offer entertainment value to those of the younger generation who may be curious to take a sneak peek into the inevitable years of middle age.
May 19, 2024
Definitely not for the young, just the young at heart.
Elaine Ambrose has a unique sense of humor, one I'm starting to recognize more and more as I get older. Her tales of life and woe are full of "pull up your big girl panties and get on with it" type of situations. Not even just down-to-earth, but rather earthy. Recommended for middle agers and seniors who still retain a sense of humor, no bitterness allowed.
Elaine Ambrose has a unique sense of humor, one I'm starting to recognize more and more as I get older. Her tales of life and woe are full of "pull up your big girl panties and get on with it" type of situations. Not even just down-to-earth, but rather earthy. Recommended for middle agers and seniors who still retain a sense of humor, no bitterness allowed.
January 10, 2021
This book read like a self help book and I wasn’t looking for that so I was disappointed. I did find the last few chapters more interesting and heart warming which is why I upped the rating from 2 stars to 3. I just didn’t like the parts describing bodily functions or chin hairs—kinda grossed me out. I chuckled at a few parts but never laughed hysterically.
June 10, 2021
Probably a Little Too Much Wine
Probably not a wide audience for this book I imagine, but I'm glad there are authors I can relate to. its comforting to know somewhere past middle age buy not 100% senile there might be women out there that still have something to say and humorously besides.
Probably not a wide audience for this book I imagine, but I'm glad there are authors I can relate to. its comforting to know somewhere past middle age buy not 100% senile there might be women out there that still have something to say and humorously besides.
September 7, 2024
If you are an older woman you will think this is one of the fumiest books you have read in a very long time. Ms. Ambrose is a great writer that tells it like it is and tells like many of us wouldn't dare or even think to tell it as she does. Later in the book she will write about her kids and mostly her Grand children especially her specail needs granddaughter. A beautiful book.
January 4, 2020
Best wine, living & laughs!
I haven't laughed this hard in a long time. Hilarious stories and tales of life, love, growing up & growing old. I want to buy a copy for all my girlfriends who enjoy reading and laughing!!!!!
I haven't laughed this hard in a long time. Hilarious stories and tales of life, love, growing up & growing old. I want to buy a copy for all my girlfriends who enjoy reading and laughing!!!!!
May 31, 2020
Funny parts, and while I associate with some of her jokes, it was just like hearing about one broads way of saying how all us older ladies should live..., in reality it could of been written differently for a younger crowd as they tips are already when known to her targeted audience
May 20, 2021
This book reminded me of Erma Bombeck meets Dear Abby. The author showed a lot of her warm personality. In fact, reading I felt like her and I were enjoying a comfortable chat on her patio, while enjoying a glass of sweet tea or wine.
May 25, 2021
Lots of good advice in these pages.
I would heartily agree with the author in almost every circumstance though I don't share her appreciation for the fruit of the vine. Getting to age 50 and beyond does entitle you to enjoy some of life's little pleasures.
I would heartily agree with the author in almost every circumstance though I don't share her appreciation for the fruit of the vine. Getting to age 50 and beyond does entitle you to enjoy some of life's little pleasures.
June 3, 2021
Loved this!
If you are a woman over 50, you will find so many things to relate to, especially if; you are married, have children, ever held a job, and lived on a farm. I really enjoyed this, and related to so many chapters and had many LOL moments!
If you are a woman over 50, you will find so many things to relate to, especially if; you are married, have children, ever held a job, and lived on a farm. I really enjoyed this, and related to so many chapters and had many LOL moments!
June 4, 2017
Funny at times but not as good as i was expecting, based on the reviews.
August 9, 2018
Disappointment. Perhaps a gender read. Not for me.
November 19, 2018
Hilarious!
June 3, 2019
Mildly amusing at best. Very repetitive and not organized.
March 21, 2021
A laugh out loud good read
Loved this book. I laughed out loud as I related to every but the farm life. This is a great read for women of any age, but especially those 60+.
Loved this book. I laughed out loud as I related to every but the farm life. This is a great read for women of any age, but especially those 60+.
June 2, 2021
one joke endlessly repeated.
June 23, 2021
I thought the author was very funny and a nice, light read like this was just what I needed at this time in my midlife.
October 20, 2017
Fun and entertaining quick read. I found myself laughing out loud quite a few times. I definitely could identify with a lot of the things the author talked about.
June 29, 2015
Amusing book. I think I'd certainly find it more amusing in 20 years. Ambrose has a way with words, being able to topic hop and tell a story with style. The book seems like a compilation of stories, so one can read it a chapter at a time and make the humor last all week. She does a pretty good job staying on course within a chapter, but she goes off on slight tangents that seem to come together at the end under a larger topical umbrella.
Ambrose was a professional in a time when women weren't really allowed to be professionals, so there's a certain credence to her stories of being a working mom back in the day. She touches on professional life, personal life, retired life, having children, having grandchildren, having friends get old and sick, holding on to friendships through whatever life throws at you, getting (and maybe not staying) married, keeping a smile on your face for extended family gatherings...in other words, a little of everything.
Ambrose was a professional in a time when women weren't really allowed to be professionals, so there's a certain credence to her stories of being a working mom back in the day. She touches on professional life, personal life, retired life, having children, having grandchildren, having friends get old and sick, holding on to friendships through whatever life throws at you, getting (and maybe not staying) married, keeping a smile on your face for extended family gatherings...in other words, a little of everything.
March 15, 2015
This is a delightful, entertaining book filled with an abundance of tips for surviving life!
An excerpt from page 1: "And I wasn't ready to stay at home doing laundry just so I could lean against the washing machine during the sexy spin cycle."
Another excerpt from the last page: "You've always been so, well, so loud. And you make people laugh. I was going to apologize but she help up a wrinkled hand. Don't change, she said. I suppose it's good to laugh."
Filling the pages between these 2 excepts is a doting grandma, reflecting on her life experiences, with an energy most of us, wish to have! A fun read! Smile, laugh, snicker and reflect on the positive experiences in your own life. A book all can relate to! Enjoy!
An excerpt from page 1: "And I wasn't ready to stay at home doing laundry just so I could lean against the washing machine during the sexy spin cycle."
Another excerpt from the last page: "You've always been so, well, so loud. And you make people laugh. I was going to apologize but she help up a wrinkled hand. Don't change, she said. I suppose it's good to laugh."
Filling the pages between these 2 excepts is a doting grandma, reflecting on her life experiences, with an energy most of us, wish to have! A fun read! Smile, laugh, snicker and reflect on the positive experiences in your own life. A book all can relate to! Enjoy!
February 6, 2015
I am pretty much outside this demographic...entirely. I bought this book purely for the name and what appeared to be a Corona 3 typewriter on the cover. Who says a cover won't sell a book? Oh, wait, I think it's the other way around. Well, anyway I am a fella, and have not experienced menopause. I do not have grandkids, although I have helped produce a couple, and I am not in my 50s, or even my 40s yet, although I'm quickly approaching.
I didn't experience the fluttering on the floor, laugh out loud experience many reviewers did, but I will say that I very much enjoyed the book. It was almost like having a guilty-wine conversation with an older aunt, you know the fun one.
The book is charming and has a lot of appeal.
I didn't experience the fluttering on the floor, laugh out loud experience many reviewers did, but I will say that I very much enjoyed the book. It was almost like having a guilty-wine conversation with an older aunt, you know the fun one.
The book is charming and has a lot of appeal.
January 29, 2015
I've decided to take the 75 in '15 challenge, and this was my first book of the new year. Elaine Ambrose gives expert advise about life after age 50--and even though she's female and I'm male, most everything she writes struck a chord with me. I could not relate to the chapters about grandchildren, but even those were witty, insightful, and downright fun to read. The section on the challenges of dealing with an elderly parent were especially poignant, bringing back the memories of the last year of my own mother's life. I would recommend this book to everyone, but I fear, like the movie The Bucket List, it will speak to those of us of a certain age and be incomprehensible to those much younger. Unless they like laughing at their elders, that is.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 98 reviews