You know, I love to read, but I never think I have what it takes to write a book. I can't seem to think of an interesting, coherent plot, or characters who wouldn't be cliches.
And then I read a book like "The Cherry Robbers" and I think, "hold up, if someone gave this author money to write a book like this, then maybe I can....."
SPOILERS AHEAD - -
Sylvia Wren is a lesbian artist living in New Mexico who paints pictures of flowers which look like women's genitalia. (Hmmm, guess the author did not have to think that up...) But really, Sylvia assumed that name when she abandoned her former life as Iris Chapel. Iris Chapel was the fifth of six sisters born to a rifle manufacturer. Iris's mother, Belinda, was haunted by... well, there's some confusion in the plotline about that - is it the victims of her husband's guns, or is it that she is a person who can see "beyond the veil" that separates this life from the next because she heard her mother's death screams as she was giving birth to Belinda? The reader is left to their own musings since both possibilities (along with a few other random possibilities) are presented. Iris's sisters die, one after the other, after their "de-flowering" (oh, by the way, all the sisters have names of flowers .....sigh.....) when, the morning after the event, they lose their minds, and break windows, and cut themselves, and faint on the floor, but it is never clear why this is happening - or why it happens to the one other sister (not Iris), who is also a lesbian, because she loses her mind and decides to swim in February in the Long Island Sound. Is the author trying to say something about the loss of a woman's self when she marries? (No, because at least one of the hetero sisters is not married when she loses her virginity, so....) And Iris is outraged when people suggest that women are prone to hysteria, but isn't that exactly what her sisters seemed to be in the throes of when they died? Sigh... There is more nonsense about Belinda smelling roses whenever death is near, but then why would she name her daughters after flowers, one even after a rose? Argh.
Leaving the plot and characterizations aside, this book drags on forever. The reader is faced with unnecessary detail after unnecessary detail, and the characters engage in pointless activities, and too much time is spent on some topics (the preparations for the first sister's wedding must take up at least one-quarter of the book) and then other are brushed over -exactly what happened to the last sister, I never could figure out.
Anyway, usually a bad book is a bad book and the excuse to write a good review puzzling out what went wrong, but this book was such a mess, I really think I may be able to write a book.....well, at least a book as bad as this one...