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Connectability: Heal the Hidden Ways You Isolate, Find Your People, and Feel (At Last) Like You Belong

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Heal trauma-driven disconnection and feel—at last!—like you belong, with guidance from the creator of the Crappy Childhood Fairy healing method and YouTube channel.

Research-backed lessons show anyone suffering from CPTSD and childhood trauma how to form more meaningful, caring relationships.

Does it seem like no matter how hard you try to fit in, you don’t feel understood, or like you belong? Like it’s so easy for other people to get together and do ordinary things—but for you it feels so awkward and stressful that you avoid social situations. Or you go through the motions of a connected life, but you never really feel close to anyone, even though you don’t know why.

You’re not alone. An almost universal adult symptom of trauma from childhood is a feeling of disconnection, and it can lead to a lifetime of loneliness, broken relationships, and the feeling that life is passing you by. But Anna Runkle (aka the Crappy Childhood Fairy) is here to help! Step-by-step, she teaches you practical strategies for healing trauma-driven isolation and developing the social skills needed to break the unconscious habits that push others away–what she calls “covert avoidance.”

Through stories of her own, prompts for self-reflection, and daily connection plans, Anna guides you

Overcome triggers that make you want to isolate Identify the role dysregulation plays in damaging connection Learn to trust your instincts, recognize red flags, and set boundaries Master the art of small talk, active listening, and "reading the room" Gradually build the warm and trusting relationships that everyone needs for a happy life This book is for anyone who has struggled to form satisfying connections with others, offering a practical, impactful path to the rich life you truly want and deserve.

This audio product contains a PDF with supporting material, and the PDF is available to download.

PLEASE When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

224 pages, Hardcover

Published October 7, 2025

68 people are currently reading
149 people want to read

About the author

Anna Runkle

8 books35 followers

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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
14 reviews
November 1, 2025
Common sense is not common - we know that healthy connections in love, life, relationships, work heal us but most self-healing book emphasize "self-love". Self-love is real but it only takes you so far.

Anna writes from the real world: the Connections and our ability to connect is what heals the *fastest* and * deepest*: if you have had the feeling of a "lost decade", speed of healing and depth of healing are the most important.

Anna's book is a healing book that helps you finally feel safe, seen, and connected with your deepest childhood dreams, adult wishes(the beautiful home, the fast cars), and most importantly the people YOU DO WANT IN LIFE!

There are books you read — and books that reach you, Connect-ability is a book that will reach you deep past the masks and the pain we have had to carry so that we could function and then at sometime "heal" - Anna's book brings that "sometime when I retire and then I can heal" to "NOW - I CAN HEAL NOW"

This book is a gentle companion through pain, a practical map for emotional healing, and a spiritual guide to connection — not just with others, but with the parts of yourself you’ve learned to hide.

Anna writes like someone who’s lived it, the demons, the angels and the emotions we all have learnt to avoid — trauma, self-doubt, disconnection — and then found the real tools to come home again with the help of friends, careers and gifts - selectively, being able to finally select people who support us fully.

Every chapter feels like a deep breath after years of holding it in. (Warning: the path through healing is easy if one looks past the inertia and back to what life COULD be)

If you’ve ever felt “too sensitive,” “too much,” or “too alone,” this book shows that your sensitivity is not a flaw — it’s your compass.

Right now, in a world of instagram friends, swiping partner, the quiet anxiety, noise and loneliness, we need this reminder: healing is connection — and connection heals - read the book, feel yourself, follow the exercises, grieve, celebrate as your life changes - I know my inner and outer life changed completely and wishing same for readers of this book.
1 review
January 14, 2026
Listening to Connectability on audiobook felt less like consuming a self-help book and more like receiving the social development education many of us never got. I ended up buying the ebook as well so I could easily go back and reference specific sections, exercises, and insights as I worked through it.

As someone with childhood trauma, I often felt like everyone else learned how to connect, navigate relationships, and regulate emotions somewhere along the way — and I somehow missed that class. Hearing Anna Runkle calmly and compassionately explain why connection can feel so hard, and how to practice it safely, was deeply reassuring. It felt like being guided by a steady, kind teacher who understands trauma from the inside out.

The audiobook format especially worked for me. Anna’s tone made difficult material feel accessible and grounding, not overwhelming. Paired with the accompanying worksheets and exercises, the book becomes not just something you listen to, but something you actively work with. The self-assessments, trigger tracking, boundary guidance, and daily practices are concrete, usable, and genuinely helpful — not busywork, but tools that translate insight into change.

What I appreciated most is that Connectability doesn’t push people to “just be more social.” It honors dysregulation, fear, and avoidance as understandable responses — and then gently shows a path forward. For anyone who grew up without safe models for connection and now wants to build real belonging as an adult, this book is both validating and empowering.

I’ve already returned to it more than once, and I expect I will again.
Profile Image for ZzZ .
125 reviews
November 20, 2025
This book is AMAZING 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

I read Anna Runkle’s previous book “Re-Regulated” (2024) earlier this year and I was very impressed, I found it to be one of the very best in its category…💚

My over-eagerness and recency-biasy high-expectationy anticipation didn’t get in the way of enjoying “Connectability” … in fact, I rate this higher ❣️❤️‍🩹❣️
Profile Image for Margaret Stan.
33 reviews
December 11, 2025
Connectability was a really good read. I went straight through it, but I can see how it would be even more impactful if someone worked through the exercises and reflections as intended. The author brings up a lot of thoughtful points that genuinely made me reflect on my own habits and relationships. I definitely learned from this book and appreciated how practical and relatable it felt.
346 reviews2 followers
January 3, 2026
This is a practical guide for people who are not very good at connecting with other people. Anna shares her experience on how she was able to heal herself and function as a highly connected person. Her perspective based on her experience means she empathizes with others who are going through same issues and shows a way forward with solid practical tips.
Profile Image for Amy Dalton.
136 reviews
November 10, 2025
Listened because I heard a reel with her. Has some good nuggets. I’m a huge connector so not a book I needed but a nice refresher. It helps for those wanting to understand those in their life who had crappy childhoods as the author calls them.
Profile Image for Tamara.
903 reviews11 followers
December 14, 2025
Connectability is Anna Runkle's sophomore book, and I enjoyed it more than her debut, Re-regulated. Connectability gives concrete and doable ideas to connect with others.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews

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