The Royal We

by Roddy Bottum

A founder of the iconic band Faith No More shares his coming-of-age and out-of-the-closet story in pre–tech boom San Francisco


THE ROYAL WE is a poetic survey of a time set in a magical city that once was and is no more. It is a memoir written by Roddy Bottum, a musician and artist, that documents through prose his coming of age and out of the closet in 1980s San Francisco, a charged era of bicycle messengers, punk rock, street witches, wheatgrass, and rebellion. The book follows his travels from Los Angeles, growing up gay with no role models, to San Francisco, where he formed Faith No More and went on to tour the world relentlessly, surviving heroin addiction and the plight of AIDS, to become a queer icon.


The book is an elevated wallop of tongue and insight, much more than a tell-all. There are personal tales of historical pinnacles like Kurt and Courtney, Guns N’ Roses, and recaps of gold records and arena rock—but it’s the testimonies of tragedy and addiction and preposterous life-spins that make this work so unique and intriguing. Bottum writes about his dark and harrowing past in a clear-eyed voice that is utterly devoid of self-pity, and his emboldened and confident pronouncements of achievement and unorthodox heroism flow in an unstoppable train that’s both captivating and inspirational.


A remarkable portrayal of a creative individual in emergence, a gay man figuring out how to be a gay man, and a detailed look at the nuance of 1980s pre–tech boom San Francisco, The Royal We will be greatly appreciated by people who loved Kathleen Hanna’s Rebel Girl, Patti Smith’s Just Kids, Hua Hsu’s Stay True, and other memoirs about the artist’s life.

Genres: Music, Memoir, Nonfiction, Biography, Autobiography, LGBT, Drugs

272 pages, Hardcover

Published November 4, 2025

Reviews

[Keen Reader · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars!

Considering that Bottum admits to being a promiscuous homosexual man and long-time intravenous drug user and addict in 80s/90s San Francisco, he did remarkably well to avoid acquiring HIV/AIDS or indeed death, by the sounds of the excess. But he does claim to have been very lucky and indeed that seems to be the case.

Unlike the other FNM title released by Jawbone Press, this has something of substance and quality to offer. Bottum can clearly write and has a nice way of relating his points, he doesn’t always come across as likeable, but possesses an openness and honesty which persists in this dark and gritty account which makes you warm to him.

He covers some interesting ground, some of the more enjoyable parts involved the start of FNM, and his long-term friendship with Courtney Love. It’s sad because this also reminds you of how many of the great and highly influential bands of that era had at least one member struggling with drug or indeed heroin addiction like Bottum in Faith No More – Guns N Roses, Nirvana, Alice In Chains, Soundgarden, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Stone Temple Pilots, the list goes on and on and so does the eventual casualties.

So overall I enjoyed the read, though I would definitely have preferred more emphasis on the music side and less of the junky/addiction side which soon grew a little too dark and tiresome. Far too many big moments were left out of the FNM story, such as the departure of Jim Martin, the death of Chuck Mosley and the development of the band beyond the "Angel Dust" era?... which felt like a series of maddening, missed opportunities. But I’d certainly recommend this to fans. Does anyone know of the best written history of FNM out there?...

[Norman Praught · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved Roddy’s story. The length was perfect. He’s a poet first, which made his depictions vivid and unique.

[Simon Sweetman · Rating 5 out of 5]

A wonderful book. So brilliantly, lovingly written. So honest. It was less about the music, more about the scene. It was also a coming out story, a coming of age story, a calling out rage story. And a survivor’s tale. What it most reminded me of, in the music-memoir world, was Patti Smith’s “Just Kids”. And if so, then Courtney Love is Roddy’s Robert Mapplethorpe. I’m here for the Courtney Love redemption by the way. That’s one of 2026’s biggest, brightest predictions — people will realise her genius, and how unfairly she has been treated in so many stories. Anyway, that’s a side note here, but an important one. What works well is how Roddy tells you a lot by not saying so much — in terms of key moments in the trajectory and plateau of Faith No More, in terms of certain members too. He has a wonderfully evocative turn of phrase, and a very good eye and ear for key humour; excellent twists to the tale along the way. It is what most memoirs fail to be: A glorious piece of writing. This was his time to shine, and he nailed it. I would recommend this book to all.

[Sharon Penny · Rating 5 out of 5]

As real as death, as gauzy as a dream, this memoir is like a beautifully written poem about the realest truths of life and imperfection. Roddy Bottum isn’t telling you everything. Nor should he. Some memories you keep, some you share. But I love what he has shared here and like Patti Smith he shares her gift for conjuring time and places so specific you can smell and see them, but shifting like smoke, here and gone, here and gone. Names if they matter, but even if they dont, the life is what speaks loudest. Brilliant flawed ugly beautfiful.

[Steve Cornish · Rating 2 out of 5]

I love Faith No More and was really looking forward to reading this book. Turns out that there's not a lot about FNM and it felt like I was reading a book about drugs. Fair play to Roddy talking about his personal battles and I'm really glad he's in a good place now however I wouldn't recommend this book

[Wendi Manning · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’m not a big fan of Roddy as a person. There was always something in his demeanor that I didn’t like. He always seemed to not want to be wherever he was. I requested this book because I wanted to see if I was wrong about him. I wasn’t.

That said, this book is good. There’s a layer of superiority that runs through it, but it’s a thin one. It’s well written and vaguely informative. There’s a lot of interesting stuff, but he usually has insults and judgments on everyone, friends included.

As I said, this is good. I’d recommend it, but not for the deep, insightful memoir it’s supposed to be, but for the stories of a scene that doesn’t really get written about.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC. All opinions are my own.

[Charles Fortune · Rating 5 out of 5]

The rawest, most captivating memoir I've read since Sing Backwards and Weep by Mark Lanegan. Roddy certainly has a way with words.

[Mediaman · Rating 1 out of 5]

Incredibly bad book that has no real point other than proving that a mind on drinking and drugs since age 13 is a terrible thing to waste.

This vacuous memoir has bland stories often with no endings, observations of things that don't matter, and too many pages spent on the author's love of drugs. For example, at one point the band is penniless so gets money by becoming hospital drug subjects for "Ethmozine." That's it. Then he adds that the drug "doesn't come up later in the narrative, I just still remember the word." Huh?

I can understand rock fans hungry for the name-dropping tidbits about Bottum being on tour with major groups or the author's befriending of Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain. But those mentions are mostly unsatisfying since Bottum admits that due to his years of drug abuse he lost a lot of memory and can't tell whether his thoughts are real or fantasy.

Fans that trumpet this mess as a brave gay classic are ridiculous. There are a few small sections on his being gay, but he started by having sex with much older strange men at age 13 and proclaims it not only something he'd repeat but objects to it being called "molestation" by others because of, in his words, "how consensual it all was." Wow. Then he confesses that at that age "all I wanted was to be molested by a priest" and he even tried to seduce one. It's fascinating to see liberal/leftist readers overlook this and treat it as it's okay since they think it's a boy "discovering" his homosexuality.

Of course he was already a drug-taking alcoholic slut by the time he turned 14. Despite his claims of talent and intellect he and his addiction pals are out of their minds. Much of this becomes random unorganized thoughts that point to mental problems from all the drugs and drinking. Have no faith in this waste of space.

[Molly Snyder · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is 250+ pages of dingy, sexy, drug-fueled and poetic musings about coming of age – while trying not to come out – in 1980s San Francisco. Written by Roddy Bottoms (can you believe that's his real name?!), founding member of Faith No More, the book is part memoir, part stream of consciousness writing and part love letter to pre-Internet SF. Bottoms documents the dichotomy of being shamefully gay while rising to stardom in an often bigoted, cis-male-driven era of music. Bravely, he did something about it: in 1992, he told the world who he was.

[Remi VL · Rating 4 out of 5]

Roddy lived quite a life! Focused on his youth, early years in SF, up to getting sober in the early 90s. I'd have liked more on FNM, but I guess it's not about the band, it's about him, and also more about leading up to today, but that could be the next book!

Overall a wild ride from a great storyteller!

[Shannon Heaton · Rating 3 out of 5]

I always enjoy musician memoirs, most of the time, but this one came close to not. So much of it was stream-of-consciousness (to an extreme level), a too-large chunk of what he did or did not do seemed performative from an art-for-art's-sake perspective. One thing that I may personally not understand is the idea of seeing how close to the edge one can get from drug enhancement. Self-destructiveness, I'm learning as I get older, isn't my bag, especially for people describing their youth.

[Tanya · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very stream of consciousness. But quite good.

[Simon · Rating 3 out of 5]

I don’t like grunge or nostalgia so I wasn’t really the target group for this book.

I do really like Faith No More though.

The book is written in mainly short sentences, it has a poetic flow to it.

Like most successful people’s autobiographies, the first part before success hits, is the part I found most interesting.

The second part that was mainly about Bottum’s heroin habit and the life that happened around it, was quite bleak and depressing.

And the first part was mainly about little shit being little shits.

[Angel Eisnaugle _thebookangel_ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m always drawn to memoirs by musicians, especially from the era I grew up in, so this one immediately pulled me in. Roddy Bottum’s storytelling feels lyrical and poetic while still being brutally honest—sometimes ugly and dark, but always compelling.

I especially loved the San Francisco and Los Angeles settings, which added so much atmosphere and nostalgia. The behind-the-scenes glimpses into his relationships and the music scene, particularly his connections with Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain, were fascinating. Bottum doesn’t sugarcoat anything, which makes the story feel raw and real.

I highly recommend the audiobook version—it adds another layer of intimacy to an already powerful memoir. A must-listen for anyone who loves music memoirs or wants an unfiltered look at that moment in alternative music history.

[Garth Jones · Rating 5 out of 5]

Roddy got it.

[Willy · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Hiding things and keeping secrets feels natural to most gay kids. We’re raised to do that and we do it well. When the time comes that this is no longer necessary, it’s a real pivot away from something not real to something real, and there’s fallout.”
“The world was changing and I tried to not be part.”

While I don't know that much of Roddy, when COVID hit, the pandemic led me to discover his musical projects; he displays such good vibe, a really chill guy. I don't take it as absolute truth, yet I enjoy way too much learning from other people's experiences, in his case, his journey in the music scene.

It's a very easy and honest read, like having a couple of drinks with a friend you haven't seen in ages, just catching up. I think he's great at recalling and describing his own life, to the point that if you've been to SF, you can imagine where he is. At one point, it was all too relatable; a lot of descriptions of what it's like to live, but especially to grow up in the closet. Regardless of the age difference, era, and geography (and everything else), I found many similarities; it was all too much. Because of this, I really respect and am thankful for his honesty. Gayness? Life? Godincidence?

[Glen Helfand · Rating 4 out of 5]

Roddy Bottum is a serious guy. As is his writing. His memoir of his childhood and coming of age is hardly a romp. His demeanor is a specific type of rock and roll, dark, moody, wily. The book focuses on his life in 80s and 90s San Francisco, foggy gray and punk rock squatting in the beer vats. There are shenanigans, but they have counter culture swagger more than abandon. A self-consciousness. While he notes his childhood experiences cruising for men in LA, another town that has a sunny gothic quality in his memory, he entered the music world somewhat closeted. It is a situation that speaks to the layers of outsiderness (His recounting of Faith No More's tour with Guns and Roses is a gay man's nightmare of misogyny.) He's among the few who were able to stick with Courtney Love as a friend. The darkness also extends to battles with addiction. He's also got a literary sensibility, though strangely, he doesn't come across as bookish in experience. It's a more nuanced mix of fam and personal struggle.

[Autumn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Elliptical and lyrical memoir from the keyboardist of Faith No More and leader of Imperial Teen. Did this erudite man really promulgate both white dreads and rap/rock? Well, things were different back then. I was there and bought the tape when everybody else did. It meant something different at the time.

Kids, you will learn so much about internalized homophobia here. The man was Courtney Love's gay best friend in the 8os and 90s and could not even self-identify as such. To be gay and famous was to be closeted. It was a dumb era.

The writing is up there with Richard Hell and Kathleen Hanna -- two other punk rockers who have seen and done it all, present at the creation. Bottum's wording is pleasantly blunt, descriptive, and precise.

I'd recommend this to anybody interested in San Francisco, being weird in the 80s, Kurt and Courtney, grief, or heroin memoirs. A fine book! Akashic always delivers.

[T_Garrett · Rating 5 out of 5]

So I picked this up because I am a huge fan of Roddy’s band Faith No More, but this was not the usual “rock n roll tell all” memoir. In fact the band figures rather small in the telling, but this is might be the most gorgeously poetic musician’s autobio I’ve ever read. His love for his family and friends really comes through. Speaking of Love, there is a lot of stuff about Courtney Love. I knew she was an early member of FNM but not how deep their relationship was. So if you’re a stan or even an invested hater (lol) you need this.

Even if you aren’t a fan of his music I’d say this is worth picking up as a snapshot of the bygone pre-tech bro era of San Francisco (wish I could have experienced it myself), life as young queer person before people were “out” in public (people of a certain age will recall the average person thought Sir Elton John and Freddy Mercury were straight for decades) surviving the AIDS epidemic, drug addiction…

Thanks for everything Roddy!

[Hakim · Rating 5 out of 5]

I needed a solid two hours to collect my thoughts after I finished this book. It is so shattering, beautifully written, soul-bearing, haunting, and cathartic that I wish it were much, much longer. Roddy has lead quite a life, from his teenage days hanging with hippies and getting into trouble to the struggles of addiction and loss in adulthood.

I usually frown upon musicians' memoirs that don't focus much on the music, but this one gets a pass because the rest is simply too powerful and gorgeously told. Don't get we wrong, there's a lot about Faith No More and a bit about Imperial Teen, but the heart of the book lies in his reckoning with his sexuality and his experience coming out as a gay man in the 90s, and how LGBTQ voices were almost nonexistent at the time in the music industry.

Overall, this was a wonderful surprise and affecting read that will for sure stay with me.

[Scott Delgado · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I first started this book, I was worried it would be too artsy. I read Bob Dylan's book, and while making every line beautiful poetry in a song works amazing, doing so in a book can become tedious. I quickly took to this book, though. It's written beautifully. It feels like a journal because he never comes out and says names of people as if he's writing about it from an outsider's point of view. Billy Gould is just Billy to Roddy. Courtney Love is just Courtney. It felt like he was writing the book for himself, and being a fan of his work since Faith No More, I knew the people he spoke of. It may not be clear to readers who aren't familiar with Roddy's career, but I think that's the point. This book is a personal memoir about a person--not a rock star/musician. There's no need to give every detail as if it's a magazine article. If you're a fan, check the book out.

[Michael · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm a big fan of Roddy's later projects, Imperial Teen in particular, but of course, I was aware of him as the keyboard player of Faith No More. However, I know next to nothing about his life, or how he morphed from that heavy, 90's quasi-metal band to the incredibly nuanced, fantastic retro-pop Imperial Teen. Sadly, this book focuses more on his youth and his Faith No More years, specifically his addition to drugs and the long, difficult journey for him to escape from that. It's an important journey, one worth chronicling and celebrating, given all the carnage drugs caused around him, but I would have enjoyed the book much more had it been less focused on that and more on his life post-addiction.

Still, Roddy is a good writer, waxing poetic in a way that enhances rather than overdoes the text. It was worth the journey and an important story in the era of 90's alternative rock.

[Rachel McHattan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Listened to this one. Roddy’s own melodic voice bringing his chaotic story to life was, in parts, uncomfortable. Don’t expect a traditional punk biography with descriptions of his incredible, and one of my most favourite bands, Faith No More. This is more an ode to San Francisco and the colorful array of interesting characters that he encountered and called friends peppered with short snippets of the rise of FNM. Being queer but in the world of early 90’s rock/punk where misogyny ruled provided an interesting juxtaposition. Descriptions of his spiral into heroin addiction and how the drug impacted everyone and everything in his life was heartbreaking. It is a gritty, dirty & fascinating read. Initially, I thought that I hated the book but before long I was riveted and I absolutely loved it.

[Travis Marcum · Rating 4 out of 5]

Finished this one recently after my cousin sent me signed copy. Even though Roddy kinda comes off like a spoiled brat, I appreciate his writing style. He doesn’t immediately give away all the details making the reader pay attention. Makes me like Faith No More even more.

Some of my favorite quotes:

“There were so many stupid looks on so many stupid faces and really bad fashion and dumb banter and ugly-man energy and poor desire decisions when the money was clearly there to make beautiful ones…..An older stance of greed and need and abuse was being held up as a revival, a nostalgic nod back to a time that never worked in the first place.”

“Out of the closet and clean. What could be more dull?”

[Alex79uk · Rating 4 out of 5]

Faith No More are one of my all time favourite bands, I've been a fan since the early 90s and love pretty much all of their work. This memoir from founding member and keyboardist, Roddy Bottum, is equal parts fascinating but also ever so slightly disappointing that a lot of the band talk is glossed over and never explored in much detail. This book is much more about how Roddy was feeling at the time, his personal experiences as a gay man, a drug addict and an outcast. I did enjoy it, I really did, it's a poetic, stream of consciousness, and all of it seems important. I just wish there was a bit more FNM content.

[Holly (bibliophiles_bookstagram) · Rating 5 out of 5]

A look into a life that many have “heard” about musicians. Growing up in Los Angeles, drugs, alcohol, promiscuity, fear of HIV all sat in Bottum’s mind daily. He knew at a young age he was gay, and by the age of 14 was sleeping with older men trying finding himself.

He lived his life addicted and shooting up, hiding his true self until so much later in life, for fear of acceptance and abandonment from his family and his life as a musician.

The turning points for him were the death of his father and the death of Kirk Cobain, as he was extremely close to Courtney Love.

Another deep, honest, and raw memoir!

[Iosiv Basarab · Rating 4 out of 5]

interesting memoir written in a very specific style by one of the founders of Faith No More, one of the best crossover metal bands ever.. I would have liked to read more about the band and less about drugs, but that's life, who am I to dictate to a writer what to put into their work? lots of interesting insights into the San Francisco artistic and gay scene, unknown (to me) facts about the leaders of Nirvana & Hole, and, of course, Faith No More.. and the writing style is quite unusual, I must admit that I enyed it

[Rivet Conri · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you Net Galley for the chance to read this moving and soul bearing story. The rise and fall of friends, the touring, the couch surfing all lends spellbinding allure to a world we’d all love to be a part of. Poetic in its prose, open in its faults and captivating in its ability to expose the humanity in the world around.

[Travis D · Rating 5 out of 5]

The opening paragraph of the short story “Greasy Lake" by T. Coraghessan Boyle came to mind many times while reading “The Royal We.” “We” shared a lot about life in SF and LA in the 80s. The sharing is a paradoxical mix of unfiltered and guarded at times. Roddy Bottum is not one to name names. The writing is often poetic and insightful.

[Jonas Paro · Rating 4 out of 5]

En av de första manliga rockmusikerna som kom ut som homosexuell berättar om sitt liv. Ibland känns det som att Roddy knarkat sönder sin hjärna helt och kanske inte riktigt minns vad han varit med om men det är onekligen ett intressant liv med grundandet av Faith No More, vänskapen med Courtney (och Kurt!), turnerandet med GN’R och mycket annat jag älskar att läsa om.