Triggered: My Memories Have a Name

by Ana Gibson

“Death has a way in triggering every memory we don’t want to remember. The hardest part is not being able to escape it, and it just proves how we can never be prepared for what comes after.” –Faith

Life is good. At least that’s what Devin believes when everything he’s ever prayed for becomes a reality. A good marriage, a good home, a good job, a happy child, and another on the way, what more could he ask for? With every step he’s taken, triumph paves another, leading him to the top of a mountain that overlooks the instability and abandonment he once endured. The peak is a breath of fresh air, and so is the sight of his future that the hand of perseverance points to. But when the sudden loss of his unborn child explodes at his feet, the earth shatters beneath him, dragging him down to a field of unsolicited war. The “good life” is threatened, quickly becoming silenced as he stares into the barrels of traumatic experiences that shoot off rounds of painful memories he’s worked so hard to forget. And the battle begins, putting his marriage in jeopardy and his sanity on the line. The nagging ache of his unhealed wounds exposes the darkness that has been hidden for so long, and a means for escape is hard to find. The pressure to stand strong and “show up” for his family rests heavy between fight or flight, cracking an already weakened foundation that soon gives way to the silent ambush no one saw coming. In the wake of terror, the attacks of his mind stand on all fronts, and he’s left to figure out how to call a truce before it takes him under. Time, hope, and patience is running out. Options are few. A white flag or another day at battle—what will he choose?

380 pages, Kindle Edition

Published January 9, 2025

Reviews

[Eddie Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are books that you can see yourself in and imagine being the characters as you're following along.

Then there are rare masterpieces like Triggered where you find yourself asking, "Did she set up hidden cameras in my house? Because how did she know I said this same thing yesterday? How did she know this is EXACTLY what I went through myself?"

As a Black man, a recipient of therapy, and a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), I got the distinct pleasure to experience this book through all three lenses, and hear me when I say, this book is NECESSARY, REQUIRED reading for anyone trying to understand what happens when Black men's voices are silenced and suppressed for so long. I was on the edge of my seat as Devin (the protagonist) sat us down to tell us his story of how his life literally flipped upside down when the echoes of the past came to bite him in the worst ways through a specific sound, a specific scent, or a specific sight. I found myself crushed every single time he suppressed his emotions and his closest people couldn't figure out how to help him look beyond the tip of the iceberg. As his Job experience unfolded, I kept saying to myself either, "This is the same thing my clients say to me all the time," or, "I went through the same thing myself."

The line of the book that took my breath away was when the therapist tells Devin to finish the sentence "I wanted her to." When he answered, "I wanted her to hug me...and reassure me that she loved me," I started crying because I literally said to both my therapist, my wife, and my mom (as instructed by my therapist to, in fact) the same thing the EXACT same way. I had already known that this book was well-written, but this moment stopped me in my tracks and pierced my soul unlike anything I've read in years. Primal. Biblical, even.

Ana Gibson's quick wit, exceptional research, and relatable storytelling will capture you and take you on a ride that will have you rooting for everyone in this story to seize the truth and navigate their way thorough the noise of their brokenness. This book is a love letter to Black men who have struggled with talking about their issues and past traumas and felt like no one would ever understand, an unofficial manual for anyone trying to understand the experience of someone who has suffered in silence despite the anger that is on full, loud blast. Black men, the ones who love them, and the ones who help them, I implore you, GET THIS BOOK!

Ana, thank you for writing this for us! You are doing God's work. Don't let ANYONE tell you different. And even if they do, dust your shoulders off.

[Bibliophile B · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book had promise, it started out really strong. The first issue is how extremely long it was. The author had super long chapters that felt as if she was rambling on and on, like, ok lady, we get it, he is triggered! I wasn't invested in one character in this book either, so I was mentally checked out by Chapter 20. It seems as though this author did the male version of For Colored Girls by Tyler Perry. The worst that could happen to this man happened in every single chapter. His wife sucked and her family was equally a disappointment, especially her mother. I am not clear on how they made it financially because it said the wife was a 1st grade teacher as to how they met, but she didn't go to work after that? I stopped reading at 61% as I couldn't take the continuous over the top bantering and extremely long chapters. I went to the last chapter and was glad I stopped because the book still sucked the last few pages. I wouldn't encourage anyone to read this as it was not constructed with precision, and you can tell it's an MMC written from a female's perspective. I am not in awe of this writing style or author at this point. Huge DNF and waste of my weekend read. I would give it 0 stars if I could.