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680 pages, Hardcover
First published April 20, 2023
⊹ ࣪ ˖ "that i would kill for you without a beat of hesitation, or remorse. and yet, at the same time, i could be reduced to nothing more than a pile of ash without you.”
⤿ ⌞ side note. while it's forbidden + an age gap trope, this takes place in a college setting and the fmc is 20 years old⌝
⊹ ࣪ ˖ “calling her beautiful was like calling the sun lukewarm. she’d blazed like the hottest part of a flame in that dress. and fuck me, i’d felt the heat.”
⊹ ࣪ ˖ “you don’t have to be scared. i will never hurt you, lilia. in fact, i’ll rain hell on anyone who ever hurts you again.”
started ➤ june 9, 2025
finished ➤ june 14, 2025
No one touched what belonged to me without repercussions.
My class.
My requirements.
My student.
Without a doubt, Lilia Vespertine was going to be a massive headache. But she was my headache.

“The wealthy possess an insatiable appetite for the rare and priceless. They stare because you’re the only thing worth staring at.”
“To answer your question about why I didn’t leave you in the gardens that night, I find you to be an intriguing annoyance.” “I guess that’s appropriate, coming from a man I find to be brilliantly antisocial,” I quipped.
“You’re the fever in my veins,” he said through clenched teeth, as he drove into me with furious determination. “An incurable madness I can’t shake. Fucking you is the only thing that keeps me sane, Lilia.”
"I would kill for you without a beat of hesitation, or remorse. And yet, at the same time, I could be reduced to nothing more than a pile of ash without you.”
”Mortui vivos docent. The dead teach the living.”
╰┈➤ read this if you like:
★ dark academia
★ touch her and 🪦
★ professor x college student
★ forbidden romance
★ slow burn + spicy🥵
★ gothic
★ morally gray mmc
READ THE TWs!!!!!!!!
OMG the way i devoured this book!!!
the perfect read for the spooky season, couldn’t have chosen a better one to start.
”I forgot the world outside the gates of Dracadia. If Heaven existed, I'd found it in those ancient, dark hallways, under cold misty skies with autumn's wet leaves sticking to the soles of my boots, in the scent of coffee and old books. And him. My moody and devilishly handsome professor.”
”She was the warmth of the sun on a cold and rotting corpse. The first breath after a lifetime of death.”
Without a doubt, Lilia Vespertine was going to be a massive headache.
But she was MY headache.
In a normal human being, it might’ve triggered an urge to get the heck out of there, because what the hell kind of person would’ve been caught on a rocky cliff, in the woods, with a man who carved corpses at night?
“That is the tragedy of women, isn’t it? We deny ourselves beauty for the sake of misleading men.”
Again, the thought of Professor Bramwell studying my puke somehow seemed worse than him handcuffing me to a bed inside what must’ve been a prison at one time. Crazy, but that was my state of mind right then.
Calling her beautiful was like calling the sun lukewarm. She’d blazed like the hottest part of a flame in that dress. And fuck me, I’d felt the heat.
“Says who? I happen to get very attached to my fictional boyfriends.” Yet another frown. “Boyfriends?”
“I read a lot.”
If the man buried his compliments that way, or softened his insults behind handsome smiles and poetic words.
Curiosity and trepidation clashed his eyes, and he skated his palm down my cheek, pausing to rub his fingers together. His thumb caressed my bottom lip, and his hand moved to my hair again, where he let a strand slip through his fingers, eyes alight with fascination. “I feel you.”
Lilia. Her name was a dirty scalpel plunged deep inside my chest, past crumbling bones and decayed flesh. It pierced the only organ I vowed could never be touched again and infected me with insufferable greed.
Could it have been more perfect? Could I have known another soul so intimately as in that moment, with the two of us wound so tightly together? Entombed by rapture and the shame of knowing we’d breached the forbidden boundary and there was no going back.
“Jealousy is a callow schoolboy’s emotion that ends in hard feelings and bloody noses. What I feel for you, Miss Vespertine, would destroy lives.”
Over her shoulder, she shot me a smile–one so fucking beautiful, I wanted to frame it. Capture it. Study the alchemy of it. How wonderfully intoxicating one simple expression could be.
I couldn’t fucking do it, because all I could think about, all that mattered to me, was the girl. The beautiful girl with her autumn hair, and eyes that reminded me of both the sea and the sky. And she was everything. The earth, the sun, the moon. The air I breathed, and the tenacious beat that kept my eroded heart pumping.
It was in that moment, I believed him when he said he belonged to me. Like a vast ocean claimed by a single grain of sand.
Burrowed deep into the roots, it blossomed from the wounds of my broken heart, tearing through the stitches that burned with memories of those who’d tried to hurt me. Sometimes, the pain was too much to bear. But sometimes it felt good, because it meant that I was capable of feeling something.