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عندما يتألم طفلك: كيف تساعد طفلك على تجاوز أي مشكلة يمر بها
لدينا دافع قوي لحماية أطفالنا، ولكن هذه الحماية ذاتها يمكن أن تؤدي في النهاية إلى إعاقتهم مدى الحياة. وبدلًا من السعي لإنقاذهم من الأمور الصعبة، يجب علينا أن نعلم أطفالنا كيفية التعامل مع مشكلاتهم والتغلب عليها.
في أحد أهم كتبه حتى الآن، يوضح عالم النفس ذائع الصيت عالميًّا والمؤلف الأكثر مبيعًا الدكتور كيفن ليمان، كيف يمكن للآباء أن يكونوا مستمعين جيدين، وأن يقولوا الحقيقة حتى في الأوقات العصيبة، وإيجاد التوازن بين الحماية والحماية المفرطة، والتعامل مع الألم والظلم كتجربة تعليمية بدلًا من تعزيز عقلية الضحية، وأكثر من ذلك، سواء أكان الطفل يتعامل مع وضع عائلي صعب، أو مع المتنمرين، أو خسارة الأصدقاء، أو وفاة أحد أحبته، أو التمييز، أو الاعتداء، أو حتى مجرد محاولة فهم ما يرونه في الأخبار.
سيجهز هذا الكتاب الأهالي لمعالجة كل المشكلات التي تقابل أبناءهم والتعلُّم منها.
في أحد أهم كتبه حتى الآن، يوضح عالم النفس ذائع الصيت عالميًّا والمؤلف الأكثر مبيعًا الدكتور كيفن ليمان، كيف يمكن للآباء أن يكونوا مستمعين جيدين، وأن يقولوا الحقيقة حتى في الأوقات العصيبة، وإيجاد التوازن بين الحماية والحماية المفرطة، والتعامل مع الألم والظلم كتجربة تعليمية بدلًا من تعزيز عقلية الضحية، وأكثر من ذلك، سواء أكان الطفل يتعامل مع وضع عائلي صعب، أو مع المتنمرين، أو خسارة الأصدقاء، أو وفاة أحد أحبته، أو التمييز، أو الاعتداء، أو حتى مجرد محاولة فهم ما يرونه في الأخبار.
سيجهز هذا الكتاب الأهالي لمعالجة كل المشكلات التي تقابل أبناءهم والتعلُّم منها.
272 pages, Unknown Binding
Published January 24, 2025
118 people are currently reading
145 people want to read
About the author
Kevin Leman
220 books380 followersDr. Kevin Leman, an internationally known psychologist, radio and television personality, and speaker, has taught and entertained audiences worldwide with his wit and commonsense psychology. The best-selling and award-winning author has made house calls for hundreds of radio and television programs, including The View with Barbara Walters, The Today Show, Oprah, CBS's The Early Show, Live with Regis Philbin, CNN's American Morning, and LIFE Today with James Robison, and he has served as a contributing family psychologist to Good Morning America. He is the founder and president of Couples of Promise, an organization designed and committed to helping couples remain happily married. Dr. Leman is also a charter faculty member of iQuestions.com. He has written over 30 best-selling books about marriage and family issues, including The Birth Order Book and Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage. Dr. Leman and his wife, Sande, live in Tucson. They have five children.
Connect with Dr. Leman on:
BirthOrderGuy.com
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Connect with Dr. Leman on:
BirthOrderGuy.com
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Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews
November 15, 2023
A helpful look at strategies for helping your children through challenging issues. Leman is very firm in his assertion that parents shouldn't try to solve their children's problems for them, but rather, be a support, encouragement, and guide as children learn how to handle difficult situations. It's a much-needed perspective in our current culture that seems to vacillate between lawnmower parenting and abandoning kids to be parented by social media.
June 3, 2022
not helpful
The only thing this book does, at least as far as I read, is highlight all the horrific and negative things a child faces. I don’t need a book to try to instill fear in me.
The only thing this book does, at least as far as I read, is highlight all the horrific and negative things a child faces. I don’t need a book to try to instill fear in me.
April 27, 2024
My modest rating is mainly due to style issues - I found much of the book a bit hard or irritating to read and not always fully clear. But for values I give the author 5 stars. For the value of his advice on average 4 (with a few 5s and a few 3s).
July 15, 2025
الكتاب جميل الا ما تخرج بمعلومات منه تساعدك في التعامل مع اطفالك.. برجع اقرأه مره ثانيه يكون طفلي اكبر واستفيد اكثر
September 30, 2025
بيحكي أمور غالبيتها بديهية في التربية لكن إحنا كأهل لازم كل فترة حد يذكرنا بالأمور البديهية.
وأكيد رح أقرأ أكثر للكاتب أسلوبو سهل وبسيط وعملي
وأكيد رح أقرأ أكثر للكاتب أسلوبو سهل وبسيط وعملي
October 20, 2018
When Your Kid is Hurting is a resource for parents in helping kids navigate the many issues that are prevalent in this day and age. Dr Leman has a good understanding of the many issues that kids face today…divorce, school bullying, depression, fear, etc. There were some pretty good tips in the book and I appreciated the Q&A section. I did appreciate some of the suggestions in the book about letting the kid take ownership for his/her actions as opposed to the parent fixing things, bring firm in such cases of abuse of the kid, etc.
I did feel that the author had somewhat of a judging tone towards the parents, with some borderline blaming of the parents for the issues kids face. I agree that there are some pretty crummy parents out there, but many of the parents are flawed humans who yes, make mistakes, but in the end, love their children and want what is best for them. Parents have a strong influence on their kids, but so do school, peer groups, society, and others who kids come into contact with. Parenting is hard enough and many of us do it with little to no resources. It is a role that needs to be respected in this day and age, and my experience with this book was that it came up short in this area. I didn’t feel comments such as “it is the parents that need the therapist, not the kids” was beneficial.
I’m also not sure I agree with all the advice that was presented in the book. In the case of the MIA father, Dr Leman advises the parent to have the kid ask the dad directly why he doesn’t see him anymore. It felt like the advice was putting the kid in the middle when I think this ought to be a discussion between the mom and dad. I also felt that the author treated the issue of school bullying a little too lightly, with the suggestion that “everybody gets teased, everybody goes through that at one time or another”. I disagree very strongly with that. Some kids are bullied pretty severely and go through it for long periods of time and in this day and age, we see more suicides as a result.
It also seemed that the author jumped to conclusions on certain situations. Like in the question about the “I don’t care about anything” kid who is so negative on life. Dr Leman suggested that the kid was on pot. Maybe/maybe not, but I think there may have been other reasons to explore. Same for the overly sensitive child, stating that when he hears that the kid is sensitive, he assumes “manipulation”. Again, maybe/maybe not true without knowing all the facts.
The book did address a variety of issues and I did find a lot of good in the book. I just think the tone could have been a little more respectful towards the parents.
Rating: 3 out of 5
This book was provided by Revell Publishing in exchange for a review.
I did feel that the author had somewhat of a judging tone towards the parents, with some borderline blaming of the parents for the issues kids face. I agree that there are some pretty crummy parents out there, but many of the parents are flawed humans who yes, make mistakes, but in the end, love their children and want what is best for them. Parents have a strong influence on their kids, but so do school, peer groups, society, and others who kids come into contact with. Parenting is hard enough and many of us do it with little to no resources. It is a role that needs to be respected in this day and age, and my experience with this book was that it came up short in this area. I didn’t feel comments such as “it is the parents that need the therapist, not the kids” was beneficial.
I’m also not sure I agree with all the advice that was presented in the book. In the case of the MIA father, Dr Leman advises the parent to have the kid ask the dad directly why he doesn’t see him anymore. It felt like the advice was putting the kid in the middle when I think this ought to be a discussion between the mom and dad. I also felt that the author treated the issue of school bullying a little too lightly, with the suggestion that “everybody gets teased, everybody goes through that at one time or another”. I disagree very strongly with that. Some kids are bullied pretty severely and go through it for long periods of time and in this day and age, we see more suicides as a result.
It also seemed that the author jumped to conclusions on certain situations. Like in the question about the “I don’t care about anything” kid who is so negative on life. Dr Leman suggested that the kid was on pot. Maybe/maybe not, but I think there may have been other reasons to explore. Same for the overly sensitive child, stating that when he hears that the kid is sensitive, he assumes “manipulation”. Again, maybe/maybe not true without knowing all the facts.
The book did address a variety of issues and I did find a lot of good in the book. I just think the tone could have been a little more respectful towards the parents.
Rating: 3 out of 5
This book was provided by Revell Publishing in exchange for a review.
October 10, 2018
Helping Your Child through the Tough Days
Sometimes when I request a book, when it comes I wonder why. This book would probably fit in that category. I think I requested it the most because it was by Dr. Leman and I have read enough of his books to know that I like them and want to keep accumulating them. And this book did not disappoint.
Yes, it is geared to your hurting child and yes the average age of the children talked about was a few years older than my two, I still feel like I gained a lot of helpful information from that book. Maybe, just maybe, if I apply a few of the things I learned, I can address some of the issues now before they become big blown up and crazy when they are middle schoolers.
One of the best quotes talking about your relationship with your child is this: "And above all, focus on improving your relationship in every way possible. If your kids are safe and secure with you, they truly can overcome anything." And that right there is my goal for the next 25 years and counting. I want my kids to feel safe with me, able to tell me anything and not fear me flipping out on them. I know this can only be done with the help of Jesus and He is the One I want to rely on.
Another takeaway from this book that I think is really important is to respond, rather than react. Immediately siding with your child about how mean the other child was isn't going to accomplish anything, neither are the plans you are making in your brain to get back at the mean child. Your child needs empathy and a listening ear as they seek to come to their own solution to the problem. That was another thing that struck me was teaching your child to stand strong, to find their own solutions, and to look the offender in the eye when they are facing a mean kid at school. "The wise parent keeps herself in the background and her child in the foreground of problem solving." But if there is physical danger or abuse involved, then Dr. Leman is all hands on deck to take care of the problem, both so more children are not endangered, but also so that your child knows you believe them.
Dr. Leman lists the five top to-dos for parents.
1. Tell the truth in love.
2. Acknowledge that life isn't always fair or just.
3. Balance your protective instinct with preparing your child for life on their own.
4. Don't promote the victim mentality.
5. Approach all life lessons as a learning experience.
There were a lot of good things in this book and I can see coming back to it in a few years for in-the-moment advice.
I received this book from Revell and was not required to write a positive review.
Sometimes when I request a book, when it comes I wonder why. This book would probably fit in that category. I think I requested it the most because it was by Dr. Leman and I have read enough of his books to know that I like them and want to keep accumulating them. And this book did not disappoint.
Yes, it is geared to your hurting child and yes the average age of the children talked about was a few years older than my two, I still feel like I gained a lot of helpful information from that book. Maybe, just maybe, if I apply a few of the things I learned, I can address some of the issues now before they become big blown up and crazy when they are middle schoolers.
One of the best quotes talking about your relationship with your child is this: "And above all, focus on improving your relationship in every way possible. If your kids are safe and secure with you, they truly can overcome anything." And that right there is my goal for the next 25 years and counting. I want my kids to feel safe with me, able to tell me anything and not fear me flipping out on them. I know this can only be done with the help of Jesus and He is the One I want to rely on.
Another takeaway from this book that I think is really important is to respond, rather than react. Immediately siding with your child about how mean the other child was isn't going to accomplish anything, neither are the plans you are making in your brain to get back at the mean child. Your child needs empathy and a listening ear as they seek to come to their own solution to the problem. That was another thing that struck me was teaching your child to stand strong, to find their own solutions, and to look the offender in the eye when they are facing a mean kid at school. "The wise parent keeps herself in the background and her child in the foreground of problem solving." But if there is physical danger or abuse involved, then Dr. Leman is all hands on deck to take care of the problem, both so more children are not endangered, but also so that your child knows you believe them.
Dr. Leman lists the five top to-dos for parents.
1. Tell the truth in love.
2. Acknowledge that life isn't always fair or just.
3. Balance your protective instinct with preparing your child for life on their own.
4. Don't promote the victim mentality.
5. Approach all life lessons as a learning experience.
There were a lot of good things in this book and I can see coming back to it in a few years for in-the-moment advice.
I received this book from Revell and was not required to write a positive review.
October 1, 2018
I think one of the toughest parts of parenting is when your child is in trouble and you aren't sure how to help them. My kids are still small enough that most troubles can be solved with hugs, reassurances, and maybe a few skittles but I'm well aware that these days are speeding by too quickly so I was curious to see what approach Dr. Leman would take with his most recent work.
Overall, I was pleased to see Dr. Leman favouring a practical approach to handling crisis. When Your Kid is Hurting combines basic counselling principles and parenting techniques into a relatable, easy to read book introducing parents to the challenges and troubles youth and children face today. I was especially pleased to find the last third of Leman's book took the format of an extended Q & A. This section was probably my favourite feeling like a form of case study and really shaping the previously presented material in a format that made it easy to see how things played out in real life. This section combined with the many inserts including reviews or reference lists help the book serve as an easy reference when needed.
I was also pleased to see that Leman did his best to introduce a plethora of issues common to kids today giving the book wider application. I know there are amazing in depth books on helping kids with mental illness, divorce, grief, etc. . but with many people today reading less it's helpful to have a general book like this that touches on many things.
I was also happy to notice that with this broad and general approach Leman took the time to address the parents themselves. He looks at common parenting reactions and walks parents through their own response to tough times. I love that Leman acknowledges the interconnection of family and how everyone needs to own their own role.
There were times I felt the generation gap in Leman's tone or approach with some of the more prevalent issues today. While he always acknowledged the gravity, some sections felt like the complexity of the issue was skirted over.
4 out of 5 stars.
I received this book as part of the Revell Reads book tour in exchange for my honest opinion.
Overall, I was pleased to see Dr. Leman favouring a practical approach to handling crisis. When Your Kid is Hurting combines basic counselling principles and parenting techniques into a relatable, easy to read book introducing parents to the challenges and troubles youth and children face today. I was especially pleased to find the last third of Leman's book took the format of an extended Q & A. This section was probably my favourite feeling like a form of case study and really shaping the previously presented material in a format that made it easy to see how things played out in real life. This section combined with the many inserts including reviews or reference lists help the book serve as an easy reference when needed.
I was also pleased to see that Leman did his best to introduce a plethora of issues common to kids today giving the book wider application. I know there are amazing in depth books on helping kids with mental illness, divorce, grief, etc. . but with many people today reading less it's helpful to have a general book like this that touches on many things.
I was also happy to notice that with this broad and general approach Leman took the time to address the parents themselves. He looks at common parenting reactions and walks parents through their own response to tough times. I love that Leman acknowledges the interconnection of family and how everyone needs to own their own role.
There were times I felt the generation gap in Leman's tone or approach with some of the more prevalent issues today. While he always acknowledged the gravity, some sections felt like the complexity of the issue was skirted over.
4 out of 5 stars.
I received this book as part of the Revell Reads book tour in exchange for my honest opinion.
December 30, 2018
My Reflections:
Kevin Leman's newest parenting book was not quite what I was expecting. This book is geared for parents trying to support the next generation to a successful, happy life. Our world is changing faster than ever, our kids are experiencing things we never had to deal with, which leaves me often scrambling trying to support the emotional and mental fallout.
Hard experiences are an everyday battle we all face, and children are just that more vulnerable to the backlash of hurt and rejection. Kids can't escape from the pressure these days, with social media, net addiction and the ever constant connectedness kids don't get the same reprieve we did growing up. Faith, love, safety, understanding and acceptance are the scaffolding we all need. Sadly our children are often lacking on one or more of these essentials.
I found many very helpful topics in this book, after all, Kevin Leman is one of the leading Christian authours parents default to. However, I had to disagree with a few aspects of this book. I expected Leman to teach from a Christian worldview, however, this book seems to have a secular bent. I know our children face issues like gender identity, and adolescent pregnancy and many others, however, I expected Leman to address issues with a Christian perspective. This was not the case. I understand writing to all audiences but I was hoping for substance, good hard questions to be answered in a biblically sound manner. This was not my experience.
That being said I did glean much from the book, I found it to be a good refresher on parenting, and especially enjoyed Chapter five Getting behind your child's eyes, very thought-provoking.
In closing, though I didn't feel this parenting book lived up to the Christian standards I adhere to, and I will not be recommending it to my friends and readers. Some readers may find the topics enlightening and disagree with my opinions, as they are solely my own.
Book has been provided courtesy of Baker Publishing Group and Graf-Martin Communications, Inc.
Kevin Leman's newest parenting book was not quite what I was expecting. This book is geared for parents trying to support the next generation to a successful, happy life. Our world is changing faster than ever, our kids are experiencing things we never had to deal with, which leaves me often scrambling trying to support the emotional and mental fallout.
Hard experiences are an everyday battle we all face, and children are just that more vulnerable to the backlash of hurt and rejection. Kids can't escape from the pressure these days, with social media, net addiction and the ever constant connectedness kids don't get the same reprieve we did growing up. Faith, love, safety, understanding and acceptance are the scaffolding we all need. Sadly our children are often lacking on one or more of these essentials.
I found many very helpful topics in this book, after all, Kevin Leman is one of the leading Christian authours parents default to. However, I had to disagree with a few aspects of this book. I expected Leman to teach from a Christian worldview, however, this book seems to have a secular bent. I know our children face issues like gender identity, and adolescent pregnancy and many others, however, I expected Leman to address issues with a Christian perspective. This was not the case. I understand writing to all audiences but I was hoping for substance, good hard questions to be answered in a biblically sound manner. This was not my experience.
That being said I did glean much from the book, I found it to be a good refresher on parenting, and especially enjoyed Chapter five Getting behind your child's eyes, very thought-provoking.
In closing, though I didn't feel this parenting book lived up to the Christian standards I adhere to, and I will not be recommending it to my friends and readers. Some readers may find the topics enlightening and disagree with my opinions, as they are solely my own.
Book has been provided courtesy of Baker Publishing Group and Graf-Martin Communications, Inc.
November 24, 2018
Every parent has that moment where their child is going through something and they just aren't sure how to handle it or what to say in the moment. Enter Dr. Kevin Leman with an immensely practical book that tackles some of the toughest issues our children deal with today, from bullying to divorce to fear about encountering a school shoote, or one of the most potentially destructive sources of anxiety for children, the misuse of social media. Dr. Leman takes an honest look at a variety of issues like these, and walks parents through strategies about how to respond to their children, giving examples of things to say and questions to ask in a way that assures them of your unconditional love and acceptance even when you don't agree with their actions.
There were quite a few strategies that I find I'm already using, but as I read through the book I realized that I have a lot of room to grow as well! Some of the statements Dr. Leman shared in giving examples of what not to say were definitely ones that I have used when I shouldn't have, with the result being that my children have not always had the response from me that they've needed. The author's words provide a clear roadmap for parents like me to make changes moving forward. I know I'll be accessing this book again in the future, and that makes me thankful for the clear way that it's laid out as I can quickly find what I'm looking for depending on what my child may be experiencing. Dr. Leman has crafted the book in an easy to read manner, and I especially liked going through the questions from readers that he includes at the end, where he answers some really tough questions that people have submitted.
All in all, "When Your Kid Is Hurting" is a great resource for parents of children both young and old. I award this book a solid rating of 4 out of 5 stars.
Book has been provided courtesy of Baker Publishing Group and Graf-Martin Communications, Inc.
There were quite a few strategies that I find I'm already using, but as I read through the book I realized that I have a lot of room to grow as well! Some of the statements Dr. Leman shared in giving examples of what not to say were definitely ones that I have used when I shouldn't have, with the result being that my children have not always had the response from me that they've needed. The author's words provide a clear roadmap for parents like me to make changes moving forward. I know I'll be accessing this book again in the future, and that makes me thankful for the clear way that it's laid out as I can quickly find what I'm looking for depending on what my child may be experiencing. Dr. Leman has crafted the book in an easy to read manner, and I especially liked going through the questions from readers that he includes at the end, where he answers some really tough questions that people have submitted.
All in all, "When Your Kid Is Hurting" is a great resource for parents of children both young and old. I award this book a solid rating of 4 out of 5 stars.
Book has been provided courtesy of Baker Publishing Group and Graf-Martin Communications, Inc.
October 1, 2018
When Your Kid is Hurting, by Dr. Kevin Leman, is a self-help book for parents of school age children to help them deal with hurtful issues their children may have. The first part of this book deals with different topics, such as social media, mass shootings sexual violence, discrimination, gangs, depression, bullying, grief and family issues. The second part of the book is a question and answer section in which Dr. Leman gives answers to several tough questions parents are faced with, such as divorced family situations, abuse, rape and emotional issues.
The part that I feel is the best in this book, is the suggestions Dr. Leman gives for parents with talking to their children. He gives tips of what to say, what not to say and how to get your child to talk to you. A couple of things that really stand out to me are:
When you ask your child what they think, you are treating them like an equal.
Allow your child to come up with their own solution.
Let your child know you understand they are going through a tough time. Listen to them, give support in non verbal ways such as a hug or favorite meal and let them take a break from faith-based activities if they feel the need.
Don't panic, stay calm, respond but don't over react. Don't judge them, give them comfort and let them know you will get through the difficult time together.
I really think this is a great book for parents of school age children and I would strongly recommend this book for anyone who lives with or works with children.
I received a copy of this book from Revell Publishing. This is my honest review.
The part that I feel is the best in this book, is the suggestions Dr. Leman gives for parents with talking to their children. He gives tips of what to say, what not to say and how to get your child to talk to you. A couple of things that really stand out to me are:
When you ask your child what they think, you are treating them like an equal.
Allow your child to come up with their own solution.
Let your child know you understand they are going through a tough time. Listen to them, give support in non verbal ways such as a hug or favorite meal and let them take a break from faith-based activities if they feel the need.
Don't panic, stay calm, respond but don't over react. Don't judge them, give them comfort and let them know you will get through the difficult time together.
I really think this is a great book for parents of school age children and I would strongly recommend this book for anyone who lives with or works with children.
I received a copy of this book from Revell Publishing. This is my honest review.
October 26, 2018
As much as we’d like it to be otherwise, our kids will walk through times of hurt and face hard things. Seeing your child hurting is difficult for any parent, whether its issues with friends, death of a loved one, or some other hard thing. So “When You Kid is Hurting” by Dr. Kevin Leman is a parenting book that will be an asset in your parenting library. This book is packed full wise parenting advice organized in a way that can make it a great reference for later. Dr. Kevin Leman gives great advice to parents to help keep the lines of communication open as kids grow, ways to improve the phrases you use when your kids are upset or facing a hard problem, how to support your kids when they are facing a big challenge and much more. The book covers issues that come at our kids from the world (like scary world events etc), hard things that become personal (friends, bullying, etc), facing big fears, handling grief and much more. He also helps parents to work at having a better understanding their child’s perspective and improving parenting habits and phrases. The book also includes a long Q&A section on specific issues that may come up in your child’s life. As our oldest gets closer to the beginning of middle school, I’ve been watching for more resources for the challenges that might be ahead. This book fits that need. I also appreciate that it addresses some specific hard things that kids face when adoption is part of their story. It’s a slow read but worth the investment.
December 3, 2018
MY THOUGHTS:
I received the book version of this publication in exchange for my honest review.
In today’s times, this is a very needed book. Because things are so different today than when I was growing up, parents are forced to face dealing with their children’s hurt in almost an unattainable capacity. How are we to help with something that we don’t understand? We can love them no matter what, but is that enough?
Parenting today is fraught with so many adversaries, such as peer pressure, mass shootings, let alone shootings in schools… drugs and sex was always around and an issue for parents, but not in the capacity it is today. Suicide among our children is escalating, and then there’s that openness toward other issues that were unheard of back in the day. And, sadly things are going to get worse.
In a society so cruel and judgmental, always angry and intolerable with what is different, racism and prejudice against almost all ethnicities… hate crimes, kids killing kids, ineffectual gun laws to fit the crimes of today… I could go on, there is a sudden, gaping void where support and supportive materials needs to be and should be.
This book is full of useful advice and although it doesn’t hold all the answers, it does provide much insight that could help. I highly recommend it to all.
I received the book version of this publication in exchange for my honest review.
In today’s times, this is a very needed book. Because things are so different today than when I was growing up, parents are forced to face dealing with their children’s hurt in almost an unattainable capacity. How are we to help with something that we don’t understand? We can love them no matter what, but is that enough?
Parenting today is fraught with so many adversaries, such as peer pressure, mass shootings, let alone shootings in schools… drugs and sex was always around and an issue for parents, but not in the capacity it is today. Suicide among our children is escalating, and then there’s that openness toward other issues that were unheard of back in the day. And, sadly things are going to get worse.
In a society so cruel and judgmental, always angry and intolerable with what is different, racism and prejudice against almost all ethnicities… hate crimes, kids killing kids, ineffectual gun laws to fit the crimes of today… I could go on, there is a sudden, gaping void where support and supportive materials needs to be and should be.
This book is full of useful advice and although it doesn’t hold all the answers, it does provide much insight that could help. I highly recommend it to all.
July 2, 2019
It's a little odd that this book starts with one of the most extreme situations, school shootings and terrorism, and then seems to deescalate from there to pedophilia and lesser situations. More common situations like bullying or dealing with emotions follow. The last third of the book seems to be an advice column.
Honestly, the advice felt too much like it would work for an idyllic WASPy mold, with slightly ignorant parents looking for the one piece of knowledge that will fix their problems. It doesn't seem to have enough consideration for those not adhering to the model. I can understand this reliance on only preaching the example to avoid the mistakes of adults who want to justify easy or lazy parenting through "I know my kid best," but it's bound to lead to wrongheaded conflict.
I laughed out loud at the section where the author thought the problem with a troubled uninspired kid was "He is probably smoking pot!" Overall, I appreciate the willingness to advocate confronting most issues as opposed to ignoring them and hoping they will go away. The book lacks the nuance needed for more complicated situations and may not work outside the mold.
Honestly, the advice felt too much like it would work for an idyllic WASPy mold, with slightly ignorant parents looking for the one piece of knowledge that will fix their problems. It doesn't seem to have enough consideration for those not adhering to the model. I can understand this reliance on only preaching the example to avoid the mistakes of adults who want to justify easy or lazy parenting through "I know my kid best," but it's bound to lead to wrongheaded conflict.
I laughed out loud at the section where the author thought the problem with a troubled uninspired kid was "He is probably smoking pot!" Overall, I appreciate the willingness to advocate confronting most issues as opposed to ignoring them and hoping they will go away. The book lacks the nuance needed for more complicated situations and may not work outside the mold.
September 26, 2018
This book is a parenting advice book. The first half of the book looked at some things that parents should and shouldn't do when their kids are facing tough situations. The author also specifically addressed certain situations. He briefly covered issues that your child might hear and worry about (like a school shooting, rape, gang violence, discrimination, etc.) or might face (like divorce, adoption, abuse, pregnancy, bullying and cyber bullying, betrayal by a best friend, grief, etc.) and suggested some things you might say to help your child.
The second half of the book was Q&A: questions that people have asked the author regarding their specific situations and his responses. They were about common situations that you may also deal with. If you've read some of the author's other books, the advice might sound familiar, or at least similar to other things he's said. The advice was generally was good. While the author is a Christian, the advice was not Christian-oriented but intended for a secular audience.
I received a free review copy of this book from the publisher.
The second half of the book was Q&A: questions that people have asked the author regarding their specific situations and his responses. They were about common situations that you may also deal with. If you've read some of the author's other books, the advice might sound familiar, or at least similar to other things he's said. The advice was generally was good. While the author is a Christian, the advice was not Christian-oriented but intended for a secular audience.
I received a free review copy of this book from the publisher.
October 9, 2018
As my kids get older, different situations come up that aren't as easy to deal with as when they were little. Reading the information about this book, I thought it sounded like it would be helpful. While there was things I did find that were helpful, I was assuming it would be a Christian book since it was from a Christian publisher. I was disappointed that it was written for the general public. There is even an "Especially for Parents of Faith" section that upholds the fact that it isn't a Christian book. I didn't agree with some of the things Dr. Leman talked about. For instance, he talks about kids having "gender identity issues" and acts like it is perfectly normal for them to be LGBTQ. At another point, he says that a family who has a "no dating until you are 16" rule as being "strict". I think it would be more helpful for Christian parents to have advice that is actually Christian-oriented advice.
I got a free copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own and given voluntarily. No compensation was given for my review.
I got a free copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own and given voluntarily. No compensation was given for my review.
October 21, 2018
This is so hard for parents today; how to care for our hurting children without being a “helicopter” parent. We have to nurture them while teaching them how to deal with life.
While Dr. Lehman generally offers good advice, I don’t agree with everything he says. But that’s okay because as parents we won’t agree with all the advice we’re given, and must know how to separate the good from the not so good. I would like to see more encouragement given to parents who are doing their best to help their kids.
The book is divided into two parts. During the first half Dr. Lehman discusses specific challenges faced by today’s child, and how a parent can handle things. The second half is question and answer about frequent situations. I think this format is helpful to parents.
While I can’t unreservedly recommend this book, I can encourage parents to read it and glean what they can from it as I believe Dr. Lehman has our children’s best interest at heart.
I received a complimentary copy of this book but was not required to leave a review.
While Dr. Lehman generally offers good advice, I don’t agree with everything he says. But that’s okay because as parents we won’t agree with all the advice we’re given, and must know how to separate the good from the not so good. I would like to see more encouragement given to parents who are doing their best to help their kids.
The book is divided into two parts. During the first half Dr. Lehman discusses specific challenges faced by today’s child, and how a parent can handle things. The second half is question and answer about frequent situations. I think this format is helpful to parents.
While I can’t unreservedly recommend this book, I can encourage parents to read it and glean what they can from it as I believe Dr. Lehman has our children’s best interest at heart.
I received a complimentary copy of this book but was not required to leave a review.
October 15, 2018
If you have children or plan to you should read this book!
Keven Leman has a way of hitting the nail on the head with almost everything he writes and this is no exception. If you have children, mainly younger than high school grads, and want to learn what to do when they are hurt this is great advice.
We live in a world that wants to keep our kids from getting hurt but the reality is that our kids get hurt and how we respond can impact them for a lifetime. There is great advice here that will give you a lot to think about and will at times be more challenging than you can imagine but well worth paying attention to.
The book is divided into two parts with the first part dealing with some of the key issues kids face today. The second half of the book is questions and answers with the author and well worth the time to read through.
For those that work with parents there is some great advice we can get from this book too.
Keven Leman has a way of hitting the nail on the head with almost everything he writes and this is no exception. If you have children, mainly younger than high school grads, and want to learn what to do when they are hurt this is great advice.
We live in a world that wants to keep our kids from getting hurt but the reality is that our kids get hurt and how we respond can impact them for a lifetime. There is great advice here that will give you a lot to think about and will at times be more challenging than you can imagine but well worth paying attention to.
The book is divided into two parts with the first part dealing with some of the key issues kids face today. The second half of the book is questions and answers with the author and well worth the time to read through.
For those that work with parents there is some great advice we can get from this book too.
September 18, 2018
This is a subject that I discuss with so many moms today....how do we help our children grow up in a world that we don't understand? This is not the world I grew up in, and when my children are hurt in ways that I could never have imagined, it's difficult to know which direction to turn. Seeking wisdom from above, we simply support our children with love. This book, however, offers the guidance that needs to accompany that love. Topics such as mass shootings, broken families, discrimination, and social media are covered in the context of general parenting advice. This is a book about loving your children, learning to recognize the signs of a hurt child, and how to be the best parent possible, within the frame of our ever-changing world. Helpful appendices include 'Top Ten Principles for Handling Life's Hurts Well' and resources for additional assistance.
September 14, 2018
This book was incredible writing and compelling to read with also very suitable to all different situations that we are the parent for this year had to deals with their kid. This book will help you and navigate these real-life from that issues and to understand your child’s world, experience, fears and learn how your child grieves and how to walk through that event in the ways that you will guide your child. I highly recommend to everyone must to read this book. “ I received complimentary a copy of this book from Revell Reads for this review”.
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August 27, 2018When Your Kid Is Hurting: Helping Your Child Through the Tough Days is an insightful read that is full of tips and tricks along with dos and don'ts to help you tackle tough issues. A book that offers many resources and useful ways to help you learn to listen and watch for signs that your child needs help. When Your Kid Is Hurting is a book that parents should read.
April 5, 2019
Interesting, with some good tips. I did find myself jumping around a bit because not all of it was relevant to our situation. I was a little disappointed that, while addressing some issues we have had, I was not able to find advice for our main issue. However, I think there were some good starting points gathered from some of the other examples in the book.
January 7, 2019
I love Dr Leman's books. They are practical and reasonable. My child is only a baby but it's never too early to listen to how things can go to make me prepared as well as to provide me with tools that I can use if/when problems arise.
February 8, 2019
Even though I’m mom to a 20 and 17 year old, I found this to be a good read. These principles can be applied to many relationships in our lives.
October 2, 2019
Good reminder of child psychology in adolescents and impact of various parenting styles.
June 1, 2019
This is a must read for all parents. We had an unfortunate situation in our family that impacted my child so I turned to this book for some advice.
February 26, 2020
I'm a sucker for anything Kevin Leman writes. I always find his writing helpful, humorous and never tedious. I recommend this and any of his books to my fellow parents.
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