(Zero spoiler review) 2.5/5
For those of you who read my last Crossed review, you will remember me stating that I needed a break from this title. The flat, puerile writing, the ridiculous focus on gore porn over narrative, the obsession with consistently trying to outdo the previous issue via 'edginess' rather than competent and compelling storytelling had more than worn out its welcome. Thankfully, I managed to keep away from the title for a few months, almost relapsing a few weeks ago when I found myself reaching for this title. Yet it felt right when I pulled out Crossed 6 and started reading yesterday. Like enough time had passed between a messy break up, and you're now ready to move on and revisit what once was without the emotional baggage and pain dragging you down. And I must say, whilst reading Ennis' four issue story, I felt justified in my decision to let some time pass. Let the wounds heal. Then again, Ennis' writing was never the problem. He was always the sharpest storytelling knife in the Crossed drawer, which made me wish the man whom birthed the series, just wrote the entire thing himself. Even if we got less issues overall, at least the thing would be a singular vision from a talented man, and the overall quality would be much higher.
The true test would be the next story by David Lapham. David... fucking... Lapham. A man whom somehow, despite writing some of the most god awful, infantile nonsense to ever grace a page, was also somehow managed to give us Stray Bullets without feeling the need to delve into his very limited and very tropey back of childish tricks and limp story craft. And I must say, after the first issue of his arc, I was cautiously optimistic. Maybe, just maybe the man had decided to (or been told to) stop with the gore porn one-up-man-ship and actually write a story. But no, this is David fucking Lapham. This juvenile, hack man child said hold my beer, and proceeded to tick of every loathesome trick in his asinine playbook, and we got one of the most inconsistent and utterly stupid plots I have ever read. I hated it. I hated it for the garbage it was, and I hate that he continues to drag down the potential of this series. I would hesitate to hold Ennis accountable for Lapham's lack of intelligence, nouse or talent, but it is his series after all. I presume he has editorial oversight of writers given work on the project, as well as approval over whatever is published. If he thought this was acceptable to publish in his universe, than he is just as responsible and imbecilic as Lapham. Simon Spurrier's two issue story was forgettable, hackneyed dross, although to be honest, my ire was already up so high that it would have taken a story far beyond the ability of Simon Spurrier to calm me down. That said, I'm not at all being unfair to Spurrier to say his story was utter crap. He has just pissed me off less often and less vociferously than Lapham, so doesn't come in for as much criticism, although they were both woeful in every way. I feel sorry for the amazing artistic talents on this book having to spend weeks pencilling to the tune of such mediocrity. That said, page after page of gore gets old and unappealing very quickly, no matter how well done it is. If I didn't already own the entire series, I would absolutely have stopped reading this. I feel as though its only going to go one way, and its not towards a compelling, maturely written world. Just more blood and gore and violence and tits and swearing and sexual depravity. It takes a special type of no talent to turn me off from all those things in a zombie story. Bravo. 2.5/5
OmniBen.