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To Have and to Hold
You’re supposed to dream about your wedding day. But mine was hell.
For one forbidden moment, Theo was my escape. He saw me, not as a pawn in the family games, not as an unwilling bride, scared and alone, unheard. He gave me what I needed, a final wish so I could endure.
Then that moment ended, and my life with my husband began. My captor. My monster. To him, I’m nothing more than a vessel for his legacy, a body to fill or to break, a soul to crush under his expensive shoe when my body doesn’t behave. He doesn’t love me. He doesn’t need to. Pain is all he gives me, and it consumes me. Tries to break me.
But I remember Theo’s touch. That promise in his eyes when I had that fleeting glimpse of how life could be. Before the darkness swallowed me whole. Before I made the vows I didn’t want to keep.
To have and to hold. Til death.
He is out there, somewhere, as trapped by the memory of me as I am haunted by him. My savior. The only man who ever cared.
In this world, at Rafe’s feet. My desires mean nothing. But I pray for Theo to find me, save me, bring me back to that moment with him. The only man on the planet worse for me than my husband.
For one forbidden moment, Theo was my escape. He saw me, not as a pawn in the family games, not as an unwilling bride, scared and alone, unheard. He gave me what I needed, a final wish so I could endure.
Then that moment ended, and my life with my husband began. My captor. My monster. To him, I’m nothing more than a vessel for his legacy, a body to fill or to break, a soul to crush under his expensive shoe when my body doesn’t behave. He doesn’t love me. He doesn’t need to. Pain is all he gives me, and it consumes me. Tries to break me.
But I remember Theo’s touch. That promise in his eyes when I had that fleeting glimpse of how life could be. Before the darkness swallowed me whole. Before I made the vows I didn’t want to keep.
To have and to hold. Til death.
He is out there, somewhere, as trapped by the memory of me as I am haunted by him. My savior. The only man who ever cared.
In this world, at Rafe’s feet. My desires mean nothing. But I pray for Theo to find me, save me, bring me back to that moment with him. The only man on the planet worse for me than my husband.
436 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 7, 2025
155 people are currently reading
2127 people want to read
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March 14, 2025
Buckle up boiz, we’re going in.
As with many dark romance books, to enjoy ‘To Have and to Hold’, you need to perform a certain suspension of disbelief.
Do I think that someone, in a somewhat unusual act of defiance, would risk the wrath of her absolute headcase of a husband by losing her virginity to her brother the day of her wedding? No.
But was the whole premise of the book so bat shit crazy and juicy that I ate it up anyway? Yes yes yes.
Who cares about realism when you have big bro bending you over a railing?
Now, let’s get into it.
‼️ WARNING, SPOILERS AHEAD ‼️
Writing style: what I loved
The delicious sprinklings of borderline poetic prose that were littered throughout the book were rather delightful.
“While all around us pulsating faces smiled in and out of focus, my body was an empty vessel. I just existed how I was meant to for the show we put on.”
“And if he hated me for it, if he scoffed or ridiculed or hurt me, the tiny flame he kept alive in me would be snuffed. The ocean would call.”
“It was the way my stomach awashed with surprise warmth, a gush or tug like a fish hook yanking me towards her. Nonsensical, mindless.”
There was a clear divide in tone of voice between Violet and Theo, and I loved the quintessential British slang thrown in that probably confused the fuck out of the Americans. Case in point - “melt” and “twat”.
There was also a wholeeeee load of female rage bleeding through in this book, which I applaud. Give me more.
“I was their sacrifice, their lamb, slaughter through marriage.”
Writing style: what I didn’t love
Both Violet and Theo had a habit of smiling and grinning at the weirdest times. Usually during sex, especially intimate moments that were supposed to be dramatic or emotional.
“Grinning, I ate her p***y with everything I had.”
Pacing
At the start, there was a very narrow time frame where a lot happened at once. I was shocked when I realised we were still on the same day at 30% in. Then, at 50% through, we suddenly hurtled forward 3 months, which was slightly jarring.
I felt like the shock factor scenes bookended the whole story. We started strong, then everything lulled and became quite low key, then the shock factor came back ten times harder.
I was hoping this newly recovered momentum would carry through until the last page, but unfortunately, the ending didn’t make much sense to me. I can see why the set up needed to happen to continue the story, but the way it was carried out was a little bit clunky.
Characters: Theo
A man of many words and not much action (unless it involves hanky panky).
He spends an awful lot of time making internal excuses and validations for why he had sex with his sister.
He also spends a lot of time whining and complaining to his family (who clearly couldn’t give less of a shit) about getting Violet out… but never actually does anything about it himself, despite him supposedly being a badass enforcer. When he does do something it’s usually spontaneous and a bit stupid.
He is also an obsessive bastard. Like, unhinged level obsessive.
“Rafael Delucci was not impregnating my sister. It was never happening. I would sooner sterilize her than let that happen. Sooner no children ever, than to have to allow Rafe’s c*m to fester in her belly to create a child.”
“Let me get something straight, little sister,” he said, his voice growing harder. “I would burn down the world for you. Kill every fucker in this city to keep you safe. I would die for you. I’d kill you myself before sending you back to that man. Violet, you are all mine. And I’m never letting you go.”
Characters: Violet
Violet was a weird paradoxal creature. Her internal monologue is almost psychotic with how violent she is, yet she’s so very passive with her actions. I kind of get why, the only way she could act out was in her own thoughts. But the difference between how meek she was and how angry her mind is was slightly jarring.
I just want to wrap her up in a blanket and send her off to get a shit tonne of therapy. But hey, at least she has the tender love of her biological brother instead.
“Will you let me do it, Theo?” I whispered, grounding myself with the touch of his warm palms over the back of my hands. “Will you let me go?” He took some long, steadying breaths before responding. His voice shuddered. “I would.” He paused. “But I would have to follow you down.”
Romance
Yes, they are siblings.
Yes, that’s awfully sus in real life.
But in this book? It worked.
When Violet has only ever been used and abused and hurt, and her brother was the only one to show her any kind of love or affection, the whole brother/sister thing becomes a lot more digestible. Honestly at some points I forgot they were related.
“I was finished pretending, faking who I was. Theo was mine, my brother, the other half of my soul.”
“I just wanted to be as close to him as possible, to crawl inside his body, to have him live inside me, connected, whole together. He was my other half, matched me, made me whole.”
10/10 would root for the bio siblings again.
The darkness
When I saw the list of trigger warnings for this book, I knew I was in for a wild ride. And Hazel didn’t disappoint. I spent several scenes cringing and even had to put the book down after one scene.
Here were some of the most fucked up scenes… represented by emojis (IYKYK):
🔪🐱🪡🍈
🪝🍆😬🩸
⛓️😦🤜💉
And here’s some random, no context, thoughts to finish things off
🤔 Would one shag turn you from a normal doting brother into an obsessed lover? I’m thinking not, but maybe I’m just having the wrong kind of sex (ie. Not with a sibling).
💅 When you’re cut up and whipped so much that you literally fill a bird bath up with your own blood, yet you can still get up and change your sheets. Queen behaviour.
🤭 On the run with the bad guys potentially right on your tail? The most important thing you have to do is pull the car over and have a healing orgasm.
Final thoughts
This book was definitely dark. It delivered what it said on the tin (although in sizable chunks rather than sprinkled throughout like I initially would have thought). Perfect for a seasoned dark romance reader. If you are new to the genre… dear god don’t start with this.
Would I read again? No, I don’t think it would have the same impact second time round.
Would I recommend it? Depending on who I was recommending it to, yes.
My star rating: ★★★★
Note: I was given an ARC copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
My unhinged book rating system:
★★★★★+ fucking fantastic, give me ten more like it. Bury me with it. First thing I'd save if my house was on fire.
★★★★★ sheeesh this shit was good. Would definitely buy a special edition of it for my trophy shelf and rant about it to my book bestie.
★★★★ a fun read. Not necessarily the best thing to ever grace this good earth, but would check out other works from this author.
★★★ this was not my cup of tea (or glass of wine) but it had some redeemable qualities that made me keep reading.
★★ well… that was definitely a thing. This book was just not it for me. Most likely forced myself to finish while crying on the inside.
★ what the ever loving fuck were my eye balls just forced to perceive? DNF’d and metaphorically chucked out the window.
Disclaimer: Writing a book is an incredible feat and I admire anyone who has managed it. This is just my personal opinion - take it or toss it as you see fit.
As with many dark romance books, to enjoy ‘To Have and to Hold’, you need to perform a certain suspension of disbelief.
Do I think that someone, in a somewhat unusual act of defiance, would risk the wrath of her absolute headcase of a husband by losing her virginity to her brother the day of her wedding? No.
But was the whole premise of the book so bat shit crazy and juicy that I ate it up anyway? Yes yes yes.
Who cares about realism when you have big bro bending you over a railing?
Now, let’s get into it.
‼️ WARNING, SPOILERS AHEAD ‼️
Writing style: what I loved
The delicious sprinklings of borderline poetic prose that were littered throughout the book were rather delightful.
“While all around us pulsating faces smiled in and out of focus, my body was an empty vessel. I just existed how I was meant to for the show we put on.”
“And if he hated me for it, if he scoffed or ridiculed or hurt me, the tiny flame he kept alive in me would be snuffed. The ocean would call.”
“It was the way my stomach awashed with surprise warmth, a gush or tug like a fish hook yanking me towards her. Nonsensical, mindless.”
There was a clear divide in tone of voice between Violet and Theo, and I loved the quintessential British slang thrown in that probably confused the fuck out of the Americans. Case in point - “melt” and “twat”.
There was also a wholeeeee load of female rage bleeding through in this book, which I applaud. Give me more.
“I was their sacrifice, their lamb, slaughter through marriage.”
Writing style: what I didn’t love
Both Violet and Theo had a habit of smiling and grinning at the weirdest times. Usually during sex, especially intimate moments that were supposed to be dramatic or emotional.
“Grinning, I ate her p***y with everything I had.”
Pacing
At the start, there was a very narrow time frame where a lot happened at once. I was shocked when I realised we were still on the same day at 30% in. Then, at 50% through, we suddenly hurtled forward 3 months, which was slightly jarring.
I felt like the shock factor scenes bookended the whole story. We started strong, then everything lulled and became quite low key, then the shock factor came back ten times harder.
I was hoping this newly recovered momentum would carry through until the last page, but unfortunately, the ending didn’t make much sense to me. I can see why the set up needed to happen to continue the story, but the way it was carried out was a little bit clunky.
Characters: Theo
A man of many words and not much action (unless it involves hanky panky).
He spends an awful lot of time making internal excuses and validations for why he had sex with his sister.
He also spends a lot of time whining and complaining to his family (who clearly couldn’t give less of a shit) about getting Violet out… but never actually does anything about it himself, despite him supposedly being a badass enforcer. When he does do something it’s usually spontaneous and a bit stupid.
He is also an obsessive bastard. Like, unhinged level obsessive.
“Rafael Delucci was not impregnating my sister. It was never happening. I would sooner sterilize her than let that happen. Sooner no children ever, than to have to allow Rafe’s c*m to fester in her belly to create a child.”
“Let me get something straight, little sister,” he said, his voice growing harder. “I would burn down the world for you. Kill every fucker in this city to keep you safe. I would die for you. I’d kill you myself before sending you back to that man. Violet, you are all mine. And I’m never letting you go.”
Characters: Violet
Violet was a weird paradoxal creature. Her internal monologue is almost psychotic with how violent she is, yet she’s so very passive with her actions. I kind of get why, the only way she could act out was in her own thoughts. But the difference between how meek she was and how angry her mind is was slightly jarring.
I just want to wrap her up in a blanket and send her off to get a shit tonne of therapy. But hey, at least she has the tender love of her biological brother instead.
“Will you let me do it, Theo?” I whispered, grounding myself with the touch of his warm palms over the back of my hands. “Will you let me go?” He took some long, steadying breaths before responding. His voice shuddered. “I would.” He paused. “But I would have to follow you down.”
Romance
Yes, they are siblings.
Yes, that’s awfully sus in real life.
But in this book? It worked.
When Violet has only ever been used and abused and hurt, and her brother was the only one to show her any kind of love or affection, the whole brother/sister thing becomes a lot more digestible. Honestly at some points I forgot they were related.
“I was finished pretending, faking who I was. Theo was mine, my brother, the other half of my soul.”
“I just wanted to be as close to him as possible, to crawl inside his body, to have him live inside me, connected, whole together. He was my other half, matched me, made me whole.”
10/10 would root for the bio siblings again.
The darkness
When I saw the list of trigger warnings for this book, I knew I was in for a wild ride. And Hazel didn’t disappoint. I spent several scenes cringing and even had to put the book down after one scene.
Here were some of the most fucked up scenes… represented by emojis (IYKYK):
🔪🐱🪡🍈
🪝🍆😬🩸
⛓️😦🤜💉
And here’s some random, no context, thoughts to finish things off
🤔 Would one shag turn you from a normal doting brother into an obsessed lover? I’m thinking not, but maybe I’m just having the wrong kind of sex (ie. Not with a sibling).
💅 When you’re cut up and whipped so much that you literally fill a bird bath up with your own blood, yet you can still get up and change your sheets. Queen behaviour.
🤭 On the run with the bad guys potentially right on your tail? The most important thing you have to do is pull the car over and have a healing orgasm.
Final thoughts
This book was definitely dark. It delivered what it said on the tin (although in sizable chunks rather than sprinkled throughout like I initially would have thought). Perfect for a seasoned dark romance reader. If you are new to the genre… dear god don’t start with this.
Would I read again? No, I don’t think it would have the same impact second time round.
Would I recommend it? Depending on who I was recommending it to, yes.
My star rating: ★★★★
Note: I was given an ARC copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
My unhinged book rating system:
★★★★★+ fucking fantastic, give me ten more like it. Bury me with it. First thing I'd save if my house was on fire.
★★★★★ sheeesh this shit was good. Would definitely buy a special edition of it for my trophy shelf and rant about it to my book bestie.
★★★★ a fun read. Not necessarily the best thing to ever grace this good earth, but would check out other works from this author.
★★★ this was not my cup of tea (or glass of wine) but it had some redeemable qualities that made me keep reading.
★★ well… that was definitely a thing. This book was just not it for me. Most likely forced myself to finish while crying on the inside.
★ what the ever loving fuck were my eye balls just forced to perceive? DNF’d and metaphorically chucked out the window.
Disclaimer: Writing a book is an incredible feat and I admire anyone who has managed it. This is just my personal opinion - take it or toss it as you see fit.
May 20, 2025
So I had the pleasure of reading the ARC for this book however there were a few changes to the book to improve some bits so I decided to do a reread. I have to say that it’s so much better now. This story is very dark and taboo with a very unhinged plot and scenes in this book. I definitely enjoyed it more this time around and could see that the author had taken the ARC reviews into consideration while making the changes. If you want a dark, messed up taboo read then this book is definitely for you 😏
April 8, 2025
when the author uses triggers and shock factor to make up for shit boring writing, one dimensional characters, and no plot.
I skipped through pages. it was boring.
just skip it.
I skipped through pages. it was boring.
just skip it.
Read
April 8, 2025Just couldn’t finish it.
September 9, 2025
that cliffhanger was criminal😭…!
4.8⭐️
3.8🌶️
Oh, brother .ᐟ idek where to begin. If you’ve read from Hazel Black before then u likely know what to expect. If not, let me tell u, she writes pitch black themes & this is no exception.
Honestly, I found this to be a tad lighter than Darkest Descent but it is by no means a “light story”. This IS more of a romance than Darkest Descent imo though. I was rooting for MCs early on in the story. And, yeah, MCs are related in this one too. 😇🫶🖤😍✨
It’s got a “he’s her safe place” vibe to it that I ate up & found myself very invested in the story. The plot kinda gave mafia vibes.
———•TROPES & SUCH•———
-siblings (M,F)
-blood relation
-forced marriage to OP
-he’s her safe place
-taboo, forbidden
———•SAFETY•———
•Virgin h (this is a pertinent part to story)
•TW/CW: (happens to h, NOT by H) rape, noncon, suicidal ideation, torture, etc
•Cliffhanger(will be book 2)
[see content warnings in book for full list!]
4.8⭐️
3.8🌶️
Oh, brother .ᐟ idek where to begin. If you’ve read from Hazel Black before then u likely know what to expect. If not, let me tell u, she writes pitch black themes & this is no exception.
Honestly, I found this to be a tad lighter than Darkest Descent but it is by no means a “light story”. This IS more of a romance than Darkest Descent imo though. I was rooting for MCs early on in the story. And, yeah, MCs are related in this one too. 😇🫶🖤😍✨
It’s got a “he’s her safe place” vibe to it that I ate up & found myself very invested in the story. The plot kinda gave mafia vibes.
———•TROPES & SUCH•———
-siblings (M,F)
-blood relation
-forced marriage to OP
-he’s her safe place
-taboo, forbidden
———•SAFETY•———
•Virgin h (this is a pertinent part to story)
•TW/CW: (happens to h, NOT by H) rape, noncon, suicidal ideation, torture, etc
•Cliffhanger(will be book 2)
[see content warnings in book for full list!]
April 7, 2025
⚠️CHECK TRIGGERS, THEN CHECK THEM AGAIN⚠️
Forced to marry the head of the church, 18 year old Violet wants to run away from her life.
Her older brother Theo is the only one in her family who truly cares for her and tries to console her on her wedding day. And out of the goodness of his heart, big bro bends her over a railing, so the nasty piece of shit she is forced to marry won't be the first to take her v-card :)
And, que the unhinged crazy psychotic chaos of this book, as Violet is being used and abused solely to be a breeding machine for the Church leader. Who also lets his closets church members use her.
We learn Theo and his uncle are part of an organisation working against his dads and the church vile business's together an secretly starts an undercover operation to get Violet out, as he realises his feelings are more then brother / sister and he must have her to himself.
This was not only taboo and unhinged but very violent, so if you are squeamish and you are not familiar with Hazels writing you might want to skip this one. But for my fellow taboo and unhinged dark romance readers, this is very well done. Thrilling and uncomfortable to read tbh.
Also, this book is a duet and ends on a cliffhanger. Book two yet to be announced :)
Forced to marry the head of the church, 18 year old Violet wants to run away from her life.
Her older brother Theo is the only one in her family who truly cares for her and tries to console her on her wedding day. And out of the goodness of his heart, big bro bends her over a railing, so the nasty piece of shit she is forced to marry won't be the first to take her v-card :)
And, que the unhinged crazy psychotic chaos of this book, as Violet is being used and abused solely to be a breeding machine for the Church leader. Who also lets his closets church members use her.
We learn Theo and his uncle are part of an organisation working against his dads and the church vile business's together an secretly starts an undercover operation to get Violet out, as he realises his feelings are more then brother / sister and he must have her to himself.
This was not only taboo and unhinged but very violent, so if you are squeamish and you are not familiar with Hazels writing you might want to skip this one. But for my fellow taboo and unhinged dark romance readers, this is very well done. Thrilling and uncomfortable to read tbh.
Also, this book is a duet and ends on a cliffhanger. Book two yet to be announced :)
Read
March 11, 2025So, I’m not going to rate this just yet. Have I finished it, yes.
Honestly, the first 53% I was bored. We were going around in circles, nothing was happening and yes there was the little incest and torture but nothing really to grip in me. Which then I found myself skimming.
Started to pick up, and started to feel like more of Hazel Black book but didn’t stay on that high.
I didn’t understand the point of “the church” I didn’t understand what the purpose was, what they gained from making alliances with families etc. Just a few holes in the story me.
Did it have taboo, yes. Did it have dark themes, yes.
But for me, unfortunately it didn’t hit.
Honestly, the first 53% I was bored. We were going around in circles, nothing was happening and yes there was the little incest and torture but nothing really to grip in me. Which then I found myself skimming.
Started to pick up, and started to feel like more of Hazel Black book but didn’t stay on that high.
I didn’t understand the point of “the church” I didn’t understand what the purpose was, what they gained from making alliances with families etc. Just a few holes in the story me.
Did it have taboo, yes. Did it have dark themes, yes.
But for me, unfortunately it didn’t hit.
April 8, 2025
The actual read for me was 3 stars but I’m giving it 4 because that final star belongs to Violet the FMC. The trauma she went through and continues to suffer throughout the book is next level and I think she is owed her own star for being alive.
The book itself I felt lacked a little in the taboo aspect of that makes sense. Yes it was there but honestly was truly overshadowed by the abuse and trauma that took over for about 80% of the book.
My opinion may change after the second book is released as I’m hoping we get more information about “The Church” and the deal and just more backstory.
It felt as though it was just a documentary read of the abuse Violet suffers for an organization that we have little info on by a man with no backstory as to why or how they got there. Not that I wanna know more about Rafe…he is the 💩
But I would have liked more information.
The last few chapters had me confused too. Like what’s going on with the Uncle? He’s definitely suspicious and weird. And the ending is a cliffy.
All in all I do want to know what happens with Violet because that girl deserves her own award 🥇 and revenge. But I was disappointed with the lack of information.
The book itself I felt lacked a little in the taboo aspect of that makes sense. Yes it was there but honestly was truly overshadowed by the abuse and trauma that took over for about 80% of the book.
My opinion may change after the second book is released as I’m hoping we get more information about “The Church” and the deal and just more backstory.
It felt as though it was just a documentary read of the abuse Violet suffers for an organization that we have little info on by a man with no backstory as to why or how they got there. Not that I wanna know more about Rafe…he is the 💩
But I would have liked more information.
The last few chapters had me confused too. Like what’s going on with the Uncle? He’s definitely suspicious and weird. And the ending is a cliffy.
All in all I do want to know what happens with Violet because that girl deserves her own award 🥇 and revenge. But I was disappointed with the lack of information.
March 13, 2025
Wow! My girl went through it! Loved it! Can’t wait for the second book, hoping it explains more about the church, interested to know more!
April 8, 2025
Updated: I’ve originally changed my rating down to 3 stars.
Reason for this is, is because in the story there’s this whole thing regarding “The Church”, but not much has been said on what the church is and what it’s involved. Also I wanted more info on what’s the deal with violet’s dad and the creep who he parred his daughter off to. Like a few things just weren’t adding and felt we’re missing out.
⚠️CHECK TRIGGERS, THEN DOUBLE, TRIPLE CHECK THEM AGAIN⚠️
Received this as an arc
This book is pitch black, heavy, extreme taboo, one of the triggers is incest (brother and sister).
Violet has been force to marriage a nasty vile piece of 💩, who thinks she still has her V Plate. Unknown to him she doesn’t want him to take it and gets her brother too.
Violet endures the most horrible trauma through this vile man and his horrible cronies. Half the stuff I read was so bad. How she survived what she went through I have no idea. Every single male in this book is vile (apart from Theo her brother).
Some parts in the book I forgot about the incest cause the trauma violet goes through over ways the relationship with her brother until the last 15-20% of the book.
It’s weird saying this cause ovs incest is wrong, but reading the book you kinda get it, cause Theo is the only male who actually doesn’t want to her hurt and he wants to save and rescue her.
He does everything in his power to try and rescue violet, and he does. But that ending had my bloody jaw wide opening.
This does leave on a cliff hanger
Reason for this is, is because in the story there’s this whole thing regarding “The Church”, but not much has been said on what the church is and what it’s involved. Also I wanted more info on what’s the deal with violet’s dad and the creep who he parred his daughter off to. Like a few things just weren’t adding and felt we’re missing out.
⚠️CHECK TRIGGERS, THEN DOUBLE, TRIPLE CHECK THEM AGAIN⚠️
Received this as an arc
This book is pitch black, heavy, extreme taboo, one of the triggers is incest (brother and sister).
Violet has been force to marriage a nasty vile piece of 💩, who thinks she still has her V Plate. Unknown to him she doesn’t want him to take it and gets her brother too.
Violet endures the most horrible trauma through this vile man and his horrible cronies. Half the stuff I read was so bad. How she survived what she went through I have no idea. Every single male in this book is vile (apart from Theo her brother).
Some parts in the book I forgot about the incest cause the trauma violet goes through over ways the relationship with her brother until the last 15-20% of the book.
It’s weird saying this cause ovs incest is wrong, but reading the book you kinda get it, cause Theo is the only male who actually doesn’t want to her hurt and he wants to save and rescue her.
He does everything in his power to try and rescue violet, and he does. But that ending had my bloody jaw wide opening.
This does leave on a cliff hanger
March 14, 2025
OMG! This book was amazing! If you enjoy Taboo romances then this book is definitely a must read, especially if you want to test your limits on some pitch black books. It’s dark, twisted and kept me wanting more and more with every page I read. I had a lot of shock moments while reading this, and yet I couldn’t put it down! I loved every bit of it and can’t wait for book 2 to come out!
A solid 10/10 read for me!
A solid 10/10 read for me!
August 10, 2025
While my taste in books tends to favour controversial topics, this one was particularly unsettling. This book consisted almost entirely of relentless scenes of rape and torture which I found to be quite disturbing and remained that way throughout the majority of the book. In the end, I couldn’t bring myself to finish it. I am frankly quite concerned that many people found this book entertaining. DNF at 65%
July 23, 2025
It makes me so sad to say that this was bad. I was so impressed with Haze's writing style when I first encountered her writing in Darkest Descent. So I was really excited about this one, unfortunately it never hit the spot for me. Incredibly drawn out, Violet could only say "please" and make sob sounds, Theo was mostly angry but didn't do much. And the whole incest part fell pretty flat. I feel disappointed, mostly by myself because I really wanted to like it, but no. The torture scenes were quite entertaining I have to admit, beautifully written and difficult. What hit me the hardest was Gabe's betrayal
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 2, 2025
Holy $*(#&$$B
You want dark? You want to be fuming with feminine rage?!
This is very dark. read the trigger warnings. It is twisted and horrendous and all the depraved dark trigger warnings you are looking for. This is my first book from Hazel Black and I will be counting the seconds until the next release.
Spoiler **
She ripped my heart out with Gabe. Just saying.
Only thing that confused me was why did Rafe not use fertility meds on his wives if he was so hell bent on an heir? This would solve his issue unless he knew he was secretly barren and this was his sick depraved game.
You want dark? You want to be fuming with feminine rage?!
This is very dark. read the trigger warnings. It is twisted and horrendous and all the depraved dark trigger warnings you are looking for. This is my first book from Hazel Black and I will be counting the seconds until the next release.
Spoiler **
She ripped my heart out with Gabe. Just saying.
Only thing that confused me was why did Rafe not use fertility meds on his wives if he was so hell bent on an heir? This would solve his issue unless he knew he was secretly barren and this was his sick depraved game.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 24, 2025
Hear me when I say, this is an extremely dark & taboo book. Once again, hear me when I say, if you have a weak stomach, this is not for you. If you are sensitive to triggers, this is not for you.
Now.
I’m still trying to process my thoughts here. Someone, for the love of god, give violet a fucking hug. There’s no way in HELL, I would survive a quarter of the torture she was put through. I had to take a moment to collect myself here and there during those scenes.
I have to say though, I feel like dark & taboo books like this aren’t necessarily plot driven. They are usually more erotica and romance based. So I did enjoy that this story had a solid plot, albeit dark & macabre, but a plot nonetheless.
So uh, when’s book two coming out? I need justice for this poor girl
Now.
I’m still trying to process my thoughts here. Someone, for the love of god, give violet a fucking hug. There’s no way in HELL, I would survive a quarter of the torture she was put through. I had to take a moment to collect myself here and there during those scenes.
I have to say though, I feel like dark & taboo books like this aren’t necessarily plot driven. They are usually more erotica and romance based. So I did enjoy that this story had a solid plot, albeit dark & macabre, but a plot nonetheless.
So uh, when’s book two coming out? I need justice for this poor girl
June 13, 2025
Nope. The incest was not the problem. It was everything else. The writing, the characters, the whole Amish-gloomy theme to the whole book.
June 14, 2025
This is basically torture porn. It does leave off on a cliffhanger that might encourage me to read the "coming soon" sequel. Not much to be said beyond that!
August 3, 2025
I can’t wait for the second book! It was really dark and taboo, just how I like it. Violet had to take so much shit and kept on fighting. Theo was fighting for her and even though he made som stupid choices I love him. Can’t wait for all the female rage in the next book, bring it on!
April 12, 2025
One dimensional plot and character development. I feel as though the author simply grasped at the lowest hanging fruit like rape, torture, forced marriage, because she lacks the depth to tie the whole thing together. I was bored, and this was about as memorable a read as the back of a shampoo bottle on the toilet when you’ve forgotten your phone.
April 13, 2025
“𝓗𝓮 𝔀𝓪𝓼 𝓶𝔂 𝓼𝓪𝓵𝓿𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷, 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓲𝓷 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓪𝔂𝓼 𝓲𝓽 𝔀𝓪𝓼 𝔀𝓻𝓸𝓷𝓰, 𝓲𝓽 𝓯𝓮𝓵𝓽 𝓽𝓸𝓸 𝓭𝓪𝓶𝓷 𝓻𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 𝓽𝓸 𝓵𝓮𝓽 𝓲𝓽 𝓰𝓸.“
🖤ARC Review🖤
As usual Hazel Black did NOT dissapoint! To Have and to Hold is an extreme taboo novel that is beyond dark! Violet is pawned off to a monster in human form in the form of marriage. One thing had to be made sure of and that was Violet was a virgin before marrying Rafe. Being desperate to keep this one thing on her terms she goes to her brother Theo to ask for him to take it👀 The absolute trauma Viloet goes through in this book is unthinkable and I love how brave she is to keep going. I cannot wait for book two and hopefully find out more about the secret society or “the Church” and what her family’s plans are. After that ending? I’m on the edge of my seat!
I understand that extreme taboo is not everybody’s cup of tea but if it IS yours I HIGHLY recommend but please read the trigger warnings this book is so very dark.
🖤TROPES🖤
🖤FORCED MARRIAGE
🖤VIRGIN FMC
🖤EXTREME T0RTURE
🖤DEGRADATION
🖤NON CON
🖤BROTHER X SISTER
🖤ARC Review🖤
As usual Hazel Black did NOT dissapoint! To Have and to Hold is an extreme taboo novel that is beyond dark! Violet is pawned off to a monster in human form in the form of marriage. One thing had to be made sure of and that was Violet was a virgin before marrying Rafe. Being desperate to keep this one thing on her terms she goes to her brother Theo to ask for him to take it👀 The absolute trauma Viloet goes through in this book is unthinkable and I love how brave she is to keep going. I cannot wait for book two and hopefully find out more about the secret society or “the Church” and what her family’s plans are. After that ending? I’m on the edge of my seat!
I understand that extreme taboo is not everybody’s cup of tea but if it IS yours I HIGHLY recommend but please read the trigger warnings this book is so very dark.
🖤TROPES🖤
🖤FORCED MARRIAGE
🖤VIRGIN FMC
🖤EXTREME T0RTURE
🖤DEGRADATION
🖤NON CON
🖤BROTHER X SISTER
March 10, 2025
I received this book as an arc but all opinions are mine.
Holy shit SB Hazel (sorry Hazel Black) has done it again! I absolutely loved this book, the ending did have me screaming though 🫣 I really enjoyed reading Violet and Theo’s relationship unfold. Having the mmc say he will do anything for fmc constantly.. HELL YES 🥵
l need to be completely honest the torture and betrayal in this book had me bawling but I continued reading it. Taking some breaks helped but I read on because I knew I could. I highly recommend reading the triggers before you start this as it is on the more horrorish side with the torture. Needs to be said one of the characters deserves a whole ass warning because he is absolutely despicable being. (Rafe if I ever see you!!)
I’m absolutely gagging for the next installation of Violet and Theo’s story. 🙈
SB Hazel/ Hazel Black if you’re reading this.. I NEED MORE PLEASE 😭
Holy shit SB Hazel (sorry Hazel Black) has done it again! I absolutely loved this book, the ending did have me screaming though 🫣 I really enjoyed reading Violet and Theo’s relationship unfold. Having the mmc say he will do anything for fmc constantly.. HELL YES 🥵
l need to be completely honest the torture and betrayal in this book had me bawling but I continued reading it. Taking some breaks helped but I read on because I knew I could. I highly recommend reading the triggers before you start this as it is on the more horrorish side with the torture. Needs to be said one of the characters deserves a whole ass warning because he is absolutely despicable being. (Rafe if I ever see you!!)
I’m absolutely gagging for the next installation of Violet and Theo’s story. 🙈
SB Hazel/ Hazel Black if you’re reading this.. I NEED MORE PLEASE 😭
April 23, 2025
Heads up—this is an extreme taboo topic, so check your triggers before proceeding.
I have mixed feelings about this book. Was it good? Yes. Did I have a lot of questions? Also yes. Does it end on a massive cliffhanger? Yup.
Violet (FMC) is trapped in an arranged marriage to Rafael, and the only person on her side, opposing the union, is her brother, Theo. The story follows the aftermath of the wedding, and let me tell you, Rafael is so sadistic I wanted to reach into the book and wring his neck. Theo on the other hand has plans to get her back.
Overall, this was a compelling read. It is very taboo and the things Violet goes through I would not wish on anyone. And I can’t wait to dive into Book 2!
I have mixed feelings about this book. Was it good? Yes. Did I have a lot of questions? Also yes. Does it end on a massive cliffhanger? Yup.
Violet (FMC) is trapped in an arranged marriage to Rafael, and the only person on her side, opposing the union, is her brother, Theo. The story follows the aftermath of the wedding, and let me tell you, Rafael is so sadistic I wanted to reach into the book and wring his neck. Theo on the other hand has plans to get her back.
Overall, this was a compelling read. It is very taboo and the things Violet goes through I would not wish on anyone. And I can’t wait to dive into Book 2!
April 10, 2025
if you read darkest descent first… don’t be worried lol because i don’t think this one was as dark. i expected it to be darker & i very much think part 2 might be darker but so far.. not as dark as i expected.
i was actually rooting for Theo & Violet… ik fucked up but i never said i was normal lol. their moments were actually kinda sweet within this fucked up story.
while i may not have thought it was that dark…. you might. so please check those TW
i was actually rooting for Theo & Violet… ik fucked up but i never said i was normal lol. their moments were actually kinda sweet within this fucked up story.
while i may not have thought it was that dark…. you might. so please check those TW
April 15, 2025
* CHECK YOUR TRIGGERS!!!!!!!
I mean if you read anything by Hazel Black you already know you’re in for a wild ride. Haha.. this book was nutty to say the least. Extremely taboo.. of course, and that taboo-ness started so fast it made my head spin! It was very good, I mean.. if you get past the triggers. But the plot and everything so good!! I need to know the secrets of the family tho!!! When is book 2 coming ?!?!?!!!
I mean if you read anything by Hazel Black you already know you’re in for a wild ride. Haha.. this book was nutty to say the least. Extremely taboo.. of course, and that taboo-ness started so fast it made my head spin! It was very good, I mean.. if you get past the triggers. But the plot and everything so good!! I need to know the secrets of the family tho!!! When is book 2 coming ?!?!?!!!
July 25, 2025
4.75 ⭐️
For a extreme taboo pitch black book the story was so engaging. The plot was interesting and kept going I didn’t want to put it down until the last 15% or so it was just non stop spice it played a part into the story. But I was just ready to get back to the story at that point lol.
Overall, I’d definitely recommend. I loved it. This is definitely pitch black 😅
For a extreme taboo pitch black book the story was so engaging. The plot was interesting and kept going I didn’t want to put it down until the last 15% or so it was just non stop spice it played a part into the story. But I was just ready to get back to the story at that point lol.
Overall, I’d definitely recommend. I loved it. This is definitely pitch black 😅
March 11, 2025
This book contains incest and alot of torture so please read the trigger warnings before reading. While I enjoyed the book, I felt like there was something missing for me, hence why only 4 ⭐️. I'm still really looking forward to seeing what is next for Violet and Theo.
March 13, 2025
Another wild ride! Hazel never fails to shock me!
I didn’t know theres a part 2 to the story, i kept wondering when her brother would come to save her. Definitely looking forward to book 2! Revenge will be so sweet for what they put her through.
I didn’t know theres a part 2 to the story, i kept wondering when her brother would come to save her. Definitely looking forward to book 2! Revenge will be so sweet for what they put her through.
May 4, 2025
FINALLY, a book that pulled me out of a terrible reading slump!!!
This is a dark, horrifying, yet beautiful read. Violet remains strong despite Rafe's deplorable treatment of her. Read the trigger warnings because this is more towards erotic horror as opposed to dark romance.
This is a dark, horrifying, yet beautiful read. Violet remains strong despite Rafe's deplorable treatment of her. Read the trigger warnings because this is more towards erotic horror as opposed to dark romance.
March 24, 2025
I received a copy of 'To have and to hold' by @authorhazelblack @s.b.hazel as an ARC in exchange for my honest review.
First thing I'd say before reading this, is definitely check those trigger warnings. This book is dark. There's incest, a lot of violence/ violent SA, forced marriage, human trafficking to list just a few of the listed triggers.
I really enjoyed the book although I wish there had been a bit more background surrounding 'the family' and 'the church' because although I kind of got what was going on, there wasn't enough information to fully understand all the whys.
Overall, I felt the pace of the book was good and I never felt like the story was rushed or that it dragged out. Like I mentioned, I just wish there had been a little more background on a few things - having said that, this didn't detract too much from the main story.
Hazel Black once again enables the reader to really get invested in the characters. The FMC - poor girl. I really felt for her and everything she goes through.
I really rooted for her and Theo by the end of the book.
It was certainly an emotional roller coaster and there was a couple of characters I absolutely loathed.
That just shows me how great this book was.
To evoke a response like that.
The book ended on a cliffhanger and I am definitely eagerly anticipating the second book.
First thing I'd say before reading this, is definitely check those trigger warnings. This book is dark. There's incest, a lot of violence/ violent SA, forced marriage, human trafficking to list just a few of the listed triggers.
I really enjoyed the book although I wish there had been a bit more background surrounding 'the family' and 'the church' because although I kind of got what was going on, there wasn't enough information to fully understand all the whys.
Overall, I felt the pace of the book was good and I never felt like the story was rushed or that it dragged out. Like I mentioned, I just wish there had been a little more background on a few things - having said that, this didn't detract too much from the main story.
Hazel Black once again enables the reader to really get invested in the characters. The FMC - poor girl. I really felt for her and everything she goes through.
I really rooted for her and Theo by the end of the book.
It was certainly an emotional roller coaster and there was a couple of characters I absolutely loathed.
That just shows me how great this book was.
To evoke a response like that.
The book ended on a cliffhanger and I am definitely eagerly anticipating the second book.
July 29, 2025
Whyyyyyyyyy don't I pay better attention to how many books a story will be... this baby ends on a cliff hanger with more to come. Solid 4.5⭐️ for me. Couldn't stop this if I wanted to. It's DARKKKK. Depraved. Taboo... I had a good time. Not so patiently waiting for book two....
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