Broken: A Memoir of Sorts

by Nikki Blue

When most girls her age attended southern socials to learn proper etiquette and grace, Nikki Seay skipped school, drank booze, and discovered her sexuality. She was a rule-breaker, risk-taker, and unapologetic about it all.

In a chance encounter, she caught the attention of the wickedly compelling, town bad boy. Their connection was instant; intense.

From deep within her, he drew out desires she didn't know she had; needs she didn't understand. She trusted him, his promises, and she willingly gave him power over her, but he stopped giving it back. He kept her gift and greedily took more, using it to control her, manipulate her, and hurt her.

*Mature readers only. Trigger warning - contains physical abuse

232 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 2, 2014

Reviews

[Emily Tilton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nikki Blue's memoir of sorts (it's hard to say what that means exactly, but it doesn't matter because every page of this book is full of an authenticity that tells the reader that s/he's sharing the author's terrible, real journey) is one of the hardest reads I've ever had. Still, it was impossible to put down: Blue tells the story of her coming to age in the midst of her relationship with a terribly abusive man with such pitiless directness that I felt that it would have been somehow an ingratitude to her to turn away from the horrific spiral of violence and desire she describes. The remarkable thing about this book, for me, is the way Blue refuses to demonize Mike, the man who abused the Nikki who narrates the book, and paints Nikki as in a very important way unable to stop desiring Mike not in spite of but *because* of Mike's abusive behavior. It takes a steely eye to write this kind of story that way, and thus when, about ⅔ of the way through the book, I felt like I needed the abuse just to stop, I saw that Blue had achieved something remarkable: I could perceive exactly why the narrator couldn't free herself, and it was that inability, expressed over and over, rather than the harrowing, vivid accounts of the abuse itself, that was so hard to read. I recommend this book to anyone who can get through a terrible, authentic story and wants true insight into the dynamics of an abusive relationship with a strong heroine-narrator leading the way.

[Suanne Laqueur · Rating 4 out of 5]

October 7, 2014: I can't yet....

November 12, 2014: Now I can.
It wasn't easy reading "Broken." It's not much easier writing a review on it. It's not the kind of story I gravitate toward. I tend to be a radar dish of content and I internalize everything. A book like this will leave me anxious and cracking my knuckles.

I read it anyway. Because I have now have three friends who escaped abusive relationships. And a teenage daughter who could easily fall into one no matter how strong a foundation of love and support I build under her. These stories happen. These stories are important. Opening up one's experience to the world creates greater understanding, and these stories deserve not only understanding, but an audience.

I read "Broken." It broke me. It broke my heart and filled me with anger and despair. It left me anxious and cracking my knuckles and peeking in to check on my sleeping daughter. It even made me smooth the hair of my sleeping son and renew a commitment to raising him as a good man. Or trying like hell.

I closed the cover on "Broken" not having full understanding of abusive relationships. But with more than I'd had when I opened it. And that's all that matters.

It's not an easy story. It may break you. But it's worthy and brave and honest.
And important.

[Marion · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow! Nikki Blue shares an incredible story of intense passion, love, hate, and pretty much any other emotion you can think of. I was pulled in from the beginning and could not put this book down. Domestic violence in teenage relationships happen more than most people want to believe. I thank her for writing such a real and hard story, what an amazing read.