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A Heart for Robbie
Waiting for someone else's child to die so yours can live is the worst kind of Hell
Celebrated Young Adult author Julian Holmes pits the heroic characters in his Black Heart series against all different kinds of monsters. But when a critical heart defect threatens his son’s life, he finds he has no champion. No amount of books, classes, or practice can prepare Julian for the fight to save his beautiful son’s life.
Suddenly there are hospitals, transplant lists, and the nightmare of insurance red tape to navigate. In the midst of his trouble, Julian meets Simon Phelps, the insurance coordinator for Robbie’s case. Simon lives so deep in the closet he might never find his way out, but he dreams of exactly what Julian has. Then one night, drunken need and desperation brings them together, and a new fight begins.
Celebrated Young Adult author Julian Holmes pits the heroic characters in his Black Heart series against all different kinds of monsters. But when a critical heart defect threatens his son’s life, he finds he has no champion. No amount of books, classes, or practice can prepare Julian for the fight to save his beautiful son’s life.
Suddenly there are hospitals, transplant lists, and the nightmare of insurance red tape to navigate. In the midst of his trouble, Julian meets Simon Phelps, the insurance coordinator for Robbie’s case. Simon lives so deep in the closet he might never find his way out, but he dreams of exactly what Julian has. Then one night, drunken need and desperation brings them together, and a new fight begins.
214 pages, Kindle Edition
First published July 10, 2014
6 people are currently reading
430 people want to read
About the author
J.P. Barnaby
51 books580 followersAn award-winning, best-selling novelist of over a dozen books, J. P. Barnaby is a proud member of the GLBT community both online and in her small town on the outskirts of Chicago. A member of Mensa, she is often described as brilliant but troubled, sweet but introverted and talented but deviant. She spends her days writing software and her nights writing erotica which is, of course, far more interesting. The spare time that she carves out between her career and her novels is spent reading about the concept of love, which, like some of her characters, she has never quite figured out for herself.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 100 reviews
December 13, 2015
After reading mostly dark and/or mystery books these last days, I was really looking forward to this book, which is - considering the main topic - not that frequent in this genre. And I really wanted to love this book, but somehow it didn't work out that well. Don't get me wrong, A Heart for Robbie is a very interesting read, but it just didn't become one of my favorites.
Julian, is a gay YA writer, who is tired of feeling alone after being betrayed by his ex-boyfriend on so many levels. He wanted a husband, a house and child for such a long time, that he decides to take the matters into his own hand. His best friend Erin is willing to give birth to Julian's child and he is really looking forward to become a father. Unfortunately, his son Robbie is born with heart abnormalities.
The medical team is informing the devasted father about all the possibilities there are to save his son's life and Julian doesn't need long to decide. Julian is going through a difficult time, a time full of desperation, fear and insecurities.
Overburdened by the whole situation, Julian is trying to take all the right decisions. While having all the support he can get by Erin, her husband Paul and his parents, Julian is still feeling alone. Luckily, Simon - who is responsible for the insurance work in the team caring for Robbie - is charmed by Julian and wants to be at his side. Deeply in the closet, he first has to overcome his own demons, but he is sure that Julian is the right man for him. After offering to drive Julian home after a difficult situation in the hospital, the two man slowly start falling for each other. I liked their relationship building, but somehow it really didn't feel credible at all. I kept thinking that everything was happening too fast.
While keeping their relationship a secret due to Simon's involvment in Robbie's care taker team and due to the fact that Simon is really deep in the closet, he is still able to help Julian handle the situation with his son. He gives him hope and strenght and is falling in love with Robbie just like everybody else meeting the sweet little baby. And with Simon's help:
And I have to say that the last thirth of the book really got me hooked, unfortunately I can't say the same about the other two thirds.
I enjoyed reading about the writing process in which Julian develops the characters for his books and his discussions with his own book characters - Liam and Clay - were interesting to follow. It took me a while to get used to the idea, but after a few scenes I was waiting for them to show up. I also liked the way Julian's OCD tendencies were described and the way they became less frequent, when Julian started to find his inner balance.
There were thus quite a few things I liked about this book and I can't even name the reasons this book turned out to be "only" a three star read for me. The pace wasn't for me and I had to struggle through so many chapters, that the great ending part isn't making up for it.
A Heart for Robbie is still a very beautiful, intense and emotional read.
Julian, is a gay YA writer, who is tired of feeling alone after being betrayed by his ex-boyfriend on so many levels. He wanted a husband, a house and child for such a long time, that he decides to take the matters into his own hand. His best friend Erin is willing to give birth to Julian's child and he is really looking forward to become a father. Unfortunately, his son Robbie is born with heart abnormalities.
The medical team is informing the devasted father about all the possibilities there are to save his son's life and Julian doesn't need long to decide. Julian is going through a difficult time, a time full of desperation, fear and insecurities.
I can see it in his eyes when he looks at me, and he can't breath, and he wants Daddy to make it better. And I can't.
Overburdened by the whole situation, Julian is trying to take all the right decisions. While having all the support he can get by Erin, her husband Paul and his parents, Julian is still feeling alone. Luckily, Simon - who is responsible for the insurance work in the team caring for Robbie - is charmed by Julian and wants to be at his side. Deeply in the closet, he first has to overcome his own demons, but he is sure that Julian is the right man for him. After offering to drive Julian home after a difficult situation in the hospital, the two man slowly start falling for each other. I liked their relationship building, but somehow it really didn't feel credible at all. I kept thinking that everything was happening too fast.
While keeping their relationship a secret due to Simon's involvment in Robbie's care taker team and due to the fact that Simon is really deep in the closet, he is still able to help Julian handle the situation with his son. He gives him hope and strenght and is falling in love with Robbie just like everybody else meeting the sweet little baby. And with Simon's help:
Robbie was fighting for his life, and his father would fight right along with him.
And I have to say that the last thirth of the book really got me hooked, unfortunately I can't say the same about the other two thirds.
I enjoyed reading about the writing process in which Julian develops the characters for his books and his discussions with his own book characters - Liam and Clay - were interesting to follow. It took me a while to get used to the idea, but after a few scenes I was waiting for them to show up. I also liked the way Julian's OCD tendencies were described and the way they became less frequent, when Julian started to find his inner balance.
There were thus quite a few things I liked about this book and I can't even name the reasons this book turned out to be "only" a three star read for me. The pace wasn't for me and I had to struggle through so many chapters, that the great ending part isn't making up for it.
A Heart for Robbie is still a very beautiful, intense and emotional read.
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June 7, 2015I think this book is very well meaning, and written with much insight on the subject of a sick child with heart defects and the impact it has on loved ones (so, no rating). Nevertheless, it is a review copy, so this is my review.
I did struggle with A Heart For Robbie because of (but not limited to) the following reasons.
I found the book to move very slowly for a while. It got a bit repetitive.
I get sick of the whole homophobic mother device - they do things like trying to set their closeted son up with a female. They also look down their nose at fat people, think their son needs a woman, think that girls should be married so a man can look after them - anything that ramps up their silly, mean-spirited (boo hiss) nature. (In all fairness, I must add that Julian's family and friends were supportive.)
I'm also not keen on (thirty+) adult-children who can't speak up when said parent(s)voice their nasty, controlling opinions.
Then there's the homophobes who equate gay men with paedophiles, yes, I know they definitely exist, but on top of a sick baby, a closeted MC, and match-making medalling mum(s) it is too much for me. Then there is the fact that the MC's both want a family and all things relationship, which the reader is reminded of quite a bit.
And it bugged me that a woman who made a comment that a man with his baby is giving his wife a break didn't necessarily mean she is against a gay father, she just didn't think about it before speaking - people do it all the time without actual malice. That Julian took offense and took off without listening didn't sit well with me - wait to hear what people say. The last part is more to do with the way the book was written than that small, isolated event.
I believe many will enjoy this book. I just could not get into it, which is a shame, the premise is a good one, I do enjoy J.P Barnaby, but you can't love them all.
This book was supplied to me by the publisher in return for an honest review.
I did struggle with A Heart For Robbie because of (but not limited to) the following reasons.
I found the book to move very slowly for a while. It got a bit repetitive.
I get sick of the whole homophobic mother device - they do things like trying to set their closeted son up with a female. They also look down their nose at fat people, think their son needs a woman, think that girls should be married so a man can look after them - anything that ramps up their silly, mean-spirited (boo hiss) nature. (In all fairness, I must add that Julian's family and friends were supportive.)
I'm also not keen on (thirty+) adult-children who can't speak up when said parent(s)voice their nasty, controlling opinions.
Then there's the homophobes who equate gay men with paedophiles, yes, I know they definitely exist, but on top of a sick baby, a closeted MC, and match-making medalling mum(s) it is too much for me. Then there is the fact that the MC's both want a family and all things relationship, which the reader is reminded of quite a bit.
And it bugged me that a woman who made a comment that a man with his baby is giving his wife a break didn't necessarily mean she is against a gay father, she just didn't think about it before speaking - people do it all the time without actual malice. That Julian took offense and took off without listening didn't sit well with me - wait to hear what people say. The last part is more to do with the way the book was written than that small, isolated event.
I believe many will enjoy this book. I just could not get into it, which is a shame, the premise is a good one, I do enjoy J.P Barnaby, but you can't love them all.
This book was supplied to me by the publisher in return for an honest review.
August 2, 2014
I am nervous. There. I said it. Actually, I was nervous the entire book.
Nervous and scared, excited and fired up, flustered and eager...
and so damn hopeful.
My heart is heavy and raw. My eyes are dry, but only because I finished the final page days ago. Frankly, I'm exhausted, emotionally beat down.
And I think you should join me. Ha! Seriously, misery loves company, right?
Wait! Don’t go.
Let me tell you why I’m suggesting that you sign yourself up for this story with an extra-large box of Kleenex.
This book isn't perfect. But our lives are filled with wonderful less-than-perfect gifts.
This book isn't easy. But some of the greatest books demand a fight uphill to get…there.
This book isn't all gloom & doom. Even in the face of despair, smiles shine and love blooms.
It is about baby Robbie, it is about family, and it is about hope.
I told you my heart was heavy, yes? Well, because it is loaded with hope.
The blurb is very well written, it effectively sums up the storyline. However, it is so much more than a father’s fight for his son’s survival. Multiple facets kept it going. You are guaranteed to stir up lots of feelz, for it was overflowing with them.
Being a mother myself, I could close my eyes and imagine switching places with Julian. I felt his pain, his desperation, and his fear. I believe the emotions are displayed with such clarity even if you are not part of the mom and dad club, it won’t make much difference. That alone is one of the many reasons I think you should experience this powerful journey.
Julian is a strong, successful man. A seasoned author with a head full of talking voices. We all know money does not buy happiness and Julian has been burned by false promises before. He confronts his loneliness head-on and accepts that his happily-ever-after isn't going to appear gift-wrapped on his doorstep. If he wants it, he must go get it.
Someone to love and someone to reciprocate....that’s what he wants, what he needs. His family supports his decision to become a father and his best friend surrogates a child to fill the void in his life.
Little did he know when a child is born, so is a parent. Parents lose the safekeeping of their own heart, no longer is it protected and secure…but if you ask any parent, it’s a risk worth taking.
Robbie is born and in an instant his elation turns to desolation.
No heart lacks the strength to break another.
This precious blessing holds immense powers and can forever change his future.
Julian, Robbie and Simon…I simply loved every one.
Strong characters tied together with deep emotions negate any complaints I might have had. I could have done without the prologue and I was less than thrilled with Simon’s mother. My emotions were strung so tight, I didn't need the added layer of disgust with the homophobic mom. I understand she had an important role in the capsizing of Simon’s life, but that doesn't mean I had to like it (or her for that matter). Some things weren't exactly necessary, so I merely grazed over those moments and focused on the essentials. The tender bonding and the fierce need between Julian and Simon balanced the hardships.
Impressive, intense and the epilogue made every tear shed….worth it.
4 huge-healing-heartastic stars*
Nervous and scared, excited and fired up, flustered and eager...
and so damn hopeful.
My heart is heavy and raw. My eyes are dry, but only because I finished the final page days ago. Frankly, I'm exhausted, emotionally beat down.
And I think you should join me. Ha! Seriously, misery loves company, right?
Wait! Don’t go.
Let me tell you why I’m suggesting that you sign yourself up for this story with an extra-large box of Kleenex.
This book isn't perfect. But our lives are filled with wonderful less-than-perfect gifts.
This book isn't easy. But some of the greatest books demand a fight uphill to get…there.
This book isn't all gloom & doom. Even in the face of despair, smiles shine and love blooms.
It is about baby Robbie, it is about family, and it is about hope.
I told you my heart was heavy, yes? Well, because it is loaded with hope.
The blurb is very well written, it effectively sums up the storyline. However, it is so much more than a father’s fight for his son’s survival. Multiple facets kept it going. You are guaranteed to stir up lots of feelz, for it was overflowing with them.
Being a mother myself, I could close my eyes and imagine switching places with Julian. I felt his pain, his desperation, and his fear. I believe the emotions are displayed with such clarity even if you are not part of the mom and dad club, it won’t make much difference. That alone is one of the many reasons I think you should experience this powerful journey.
Julian is a strong, successful man. A seasoned author with a head full of talking voices. We all know money does not buy happiness and Julian has been burned by false promises before. He confronts his loneliness head-on and accepts that his happily-ever-after isn't going to appear gift-wrapped on his doorstep. If he wants it, he must go get it.
Someone to love and someone to reciprocate....that’s what he wants, what he needs. His family supports his decision to become a father and his best friend surrogates a child to fill the void in his life.
Little did he know when a child is born, so is a parent. Parents lose the safekeeping of their own heart, no longer is it protected and secure…but if you ask any parent, it’s a risk worth taking.
Robbie is born and in an instant his elation turns to desolation.
No heart lacks the strength to break another.
This precious blessing holds immense powers and can forever change his future.
Julian, Robbie and Simon…I simply loved every one.
Strong characters tied together with deep emotions negate any complaints I might have had. I could have done without the prologue and I was less than thrilled with Simon’s mother. My emotions were strung so tight, I didn't need the added layer of disgust with the homophobic mom. I understand she had an important role in the capsizing of Simon’s life, but that doesn't mean I had to like it (or her for that matter). Some things weren't exactly necessary, so I merely grazed over those moments and focused on the essentials. The tender bonding and the fierce need between Julian and Simon balanced the hardships.
Impressive, intense and the epilogue made every tear shed….worth it.
4 huge-healing-heartastic stars*
March 10, 2015
This is an amazing story that I recommend to anyone. It has a m/m romance plot that I really enjoyed. It did not feel like a side story which I thought it might. It was a real romance and I loved the fact that Simon was able to be there for Julian and Robbie at a time when they really needed it, and that they gave Simon the courage to finally accept himself and stand up to his parents about who he was.
But of course the core of this story is Robbie. Julian's best friend was a surrogate for Robbie, and Julian wanted a child more than anything. From the moment Robbie is born and rushed away by the doctors, through the end of the book, we really feel Julian's sense of helplessness, despair, hope, and intense parental love. Knowing this was based on a true story made everything incredibly real and authentic.
The thing I loved about JP's "Aaron" is, as angsty as that book was, it had consistent moments of brilliant and hope that lifted the story and made it a rollercoaster rather than a downward spiral. It never felt like the author was just beating the characters over the head with drama for the sake of it. I'm not a big angst fan, but I loved that book and I love "A Heart for Robbie". Though it is a story that has an intense struggle for the life of a little boy, it is never without hope. The love throughout is amazing, touching, and real. The positive moments and scenes uplift the book and make it a compelling (though heart-wrenching) read.
I read this book without putting it down except when I absolutely had to. Highly recommended for anyone, not just m/m readers.
But of course the core of this story is Robbie. Julian's best friend was a surrogate for Robbie, and Julian wanted a child more than anything. From the moment Robbie is born and rushed away by the doctors, through the end of the book, we really feel Julian's sense of helplessness, despair, hope, and intense parental love. Knowing this was based on a true story made everything incredibly real and authentic.
The thing I loved about JP's "Aaron" is, as angsty as that book was, it had consistent moments of brilliant and hope that lifted the story and made it a rollercoaster rather than a downward spiral. It never felt like the author was just beating the characters over the head with drama for the sake of it. I'm not a big angst fan, but I loved that book and I love "A Heart for Robbie". Though it is a story that has an intense struggle for the life of a little boy, it is never without hope. The love throughout is amazing, touching, and real. The positive moments and scenes uplift the book and make it a compelling (though heart-wrenching) read.
I read this book without putting it down except when I absolutely had to. Highly recommended for anyone, not just m/m readers.
December 26, 2014
I just finished this and it's hard to verbalize my thoughts into a coherent review. This was truly a love story, but not necessarily a love story like I've come to expect from the M/M genre. It was so much more. It was the story of the love of one man for his child, his family, his friends, and eventually for another man as well. But aside from all of those facets of love, there's no mistaking the fact that this story is principally about a father's love more than anything else.
Julian Holmes is a highly successful author whose best friend Erin, as his surrogate, has just delivered his son as the story opens. But the baby has a defective heart, so much so that he needs to have immediate surgery and he must go onto the cardiac transplant list if he qualifies. It's touch and go for a while and Julian soaks up everything he needs to know to be able to care for his special needs baby but even with the support of his parents and best friends, at the end of the day he's alone. And though he notices that lack in his life, he's not prepared to focus on anything but baby Robbie.
But then a chance meeting with the insurance coordinator from the hospital, Simon Phelps, leads to more than a quick drink and a ride home and Julian finds himself falling for the handsome, quiet man who's deeply in the closet. Simon has not come out to family or friends, fearing that he'll lose them and he'll be completely alone in the world. And he certainly can't come out now that he's started a relationship with Julian because it's against hospital ethics for him to be involved with someone who's on the transplant list.
Nevertheless, the men fall more deeply in love, and when Robbie is facing a life or death crisis, Simon is accidentally outted and their relationship becomes known. The steps both men then take in their relationship are not disappointing and I appreciate that the author didn't create a misunderstanding or major crisis between them to lengthen the story. They acted true to character and provided for a more poignant and emotionally moving drama.
This story is so very much worth reading for any fans of M/M romance, but especially for those who appreciate hurt/comfort stories and for those who want something that is about the love between two men and the day to day life activities of being in love, rather than a quick hot sex scene. And the book is for those who appreciate a story involving family and all that stands for. Make sure you have your tissues ready before you start to read. You're going to find it hard to put this one down before you're done.
Julian Holmes is a highly successful author whose best friend Erin, as his surrogate, has just delivered his son as the story opens. But the baby has a defective heart, so much so that he needs to have immediate surgery and he must go onto the cardiac transplant list if he qualifies. It's touch and go for a while and Julian soaks up everything he needs to know to be able to care for his special needs baby but even with the support of his parents and best friends, at the end of the day he's alone. And though he notices that lack in his life, he's not prepared to focus on anything but baby Robbie.
But then a chance meeting with the insurance coordinator from the hospital, Simon Phelps, leads to more than a quick drink and a ride home and Julian finds himself falling for the handsome, quiet man who's deeply in the closet. Simon has not come out to family or friends, fearing that he'll lose them and he'll be completely alone in the world. And he certainly can't come out now that he's started a relationship with Julian because it's against hospital ethics for him to be involved with someone who's on the transplant list.
Nevertheless, the men fall more deeply in love, and when Robbie is facing a life or death crisis, Simon is accidentally outted and their relationship becomes known. The steps both men then take in their relationship are not disappointing and I appreciate that the author didn't create a misunderstanding or major crisis between them to lengthen the story. They acted true to character and provided for a more poignant and emotionally moving drama.
This story is so very much worth reading for any fans of M/M romance, but especially for those who appreciate hurt/comfort stories and for those who want something that is about the love between two men and the day to day life activities of being in love, rather than a quick hot sex scene. And the book is for those who appreciate a story involving family and all that stands for. Make sure you have your tissues ready before you start to read. You're going to find it hard to put this one down before you're done.
March 25, 2015
This was a very difficult book to read. Especially if you are a parent. Even more so if you are a parent whose newborn had to spend time in the hospital. My experience wasn't anywhere near as traumatic as a heart transplant, but this story brought back a lot of memories nonetheless. I enjoyed Julian and Simon. There was a little bit of insta-love going on, but I can see how their backgrounds lead them to move so quickly. A very good (and very emotional) book.
August 12, 2015
4 stars.
November 4, 2014
A Heart for Robbie, I believe, is J.p. Barnaby’s finest work. For those of you who are fans of her writing, you know that is no small compliment. For those of you who are too scared to read her books, knock it off and toughen up a bit—you’re missing a master storyteller. Sure, she can make you cry and wince. That’s the sign of some good writing. She makes you feel! Unlike, yours truly, I’ve yet to read a Barnaby that didn’t leave my spirit soaring by the end. (Okay, I’ll quit bossing now.)
I will be honest, I was nervous about this book. I guess I didn’t have faith. And, for that, I apologize. I couldn’t see how Barnaby could take such a personal, possibly heart-wrenching tale, and make it a romance. She did. I’m still not really sure how she pulled it off, but she did. Beautifully.
The most important part of this book, Robbie (and the implied waiting for death of another child to save Robbie), I am not a good enough writer to even capture what a truly spectacular job Barnaby did around every nuance of him and this topic. Wherever there was a sweet note needed, she played it. Wherever there was anxiety or fear required, she weaved it in seamlessly. Wherever there was the need for a small escape into fantasy, she allowed it to flow followed by enough real-life sincerity to give it depth and credence. It was a symphony.
This is more than excellent writing (and it is). It is story of immeasurable importance, a story of light and hope in a world of darkness and pain, a story of love for those who gave up their life so that others might live. It is a story that will stay with you forever.
I will be honest, I was nervous about this book. I guess I didn’t have faith. And, for that, I apologize. I couldn’t see how Barnaby could take such a personal, possibly heart-wrenching tale, and make it a romance. She did. I’m still not really sure how she pulled it off, but she did. Beautifully.
The most important part of this book, Robbie (and the implied waiting for death of another child to save Robbie), I am not a good enough writer to even capture what a truly spectacular job Barnaby did around every nuance of him and this topic. Wherever there was a sweet note needed, she played it. Wherever there was anxiety or fear required, she weaved it in seamlessly. Wherever there was the need for a small escape into fantasy, she allowed it to flow followed by enough real-life sincerity to give it depth and credence. It was a symphony.
This is more than excellent writing (and it is). It is story of immeasurable importance, a story of light and hope in a world of darkness and pain, a story of love for those who gave up their life so that others might live. It is a story that will stay with you forever.
August 15, 2014
This book could have easily crossed the line into preachy. I am very glad it did not. Though a couple of the minor/supporting characters invoked god ad nauseam, the MC's didn't so much (thankfully). I don't like to be preached at in my pleasure reading, so I'm happy that the line wasn't crossed here.
This book touched me on so many levels. It was heart breaking and hopeful. It was nerve wracking and beautiful. I loved getting to know Julian and his writing process. Liam and Clay were good company. I even loved his OCD tendencies, though they seemed to get less pronounced as the story unfolded. I loved watching Simon not only come to terms with being gay, but get strong enough to come out. And I loved Robbie, whose very presence one can not help but cherish. Together they learned what life and family is all about.
I knew going in that this book was going to be a bit intense. JP Barnaby writes some intense stories and doesn't seem to shy away from the hard stuff. Her writing is not in the least bit superficial, but full and vivid. No exception here. She is on my, very short, auto-buy list and I can't wait to see what she comes up with next.
This book touched me on so many levels. It was heart breaking and hopeful. It was nerve wracking and beautiful. I loved getting to know Julian and his writing process. Liam and Clay were good company. I even loved his OCD tendencies, though they seemed to get less pronounced as the story unfolded. I loved watching Simon not only come to terms with being gay, but get strong enough to come out. And I loved Robbie, whose very presence one can not help but cherish. Together they learned what life and family is all about.
I knew going in that this book was going to be a bit intense. JP Barnaby writes some intense stories and doesn't seem to shy away from the hard stuff. Her writing is not in the least bit superficial, but full and vivid. No exception here. She is on my, very short, auto-buy list and I can't wait to see what she comes up with next.
December 31, 2018
4.5 Stars
I’m not quite sure how I missed this story by JP Barnaby, but I sure am glad I found it! This was a sweet and lovely read. Sad, but also filled with hope and so much love. I absolutely adored Julian and Simon and l loved watching them with little Robbie.
Robbie’s illness brings up a lot of memories, although my daughter didn’t need a heart transplant, she did have open heart surgery at 9 months old and I remember the fear and uncertainty of not knowing if she would make it to, and later through, surgery. Asking the doctors for reassurances and hitting a brick wall and I definitely remember the screeching of that damned apnea monitor, and while it was annoying, it was also a security letting you know your baby was still alive. I thought the author’s handling of Robbie’s illness was authentic and well done.
This was an enjoyable read, well-written and filled with emotion. Simon and Julian were wonderful guys and I loved that they found one another. They had amazing chemistry and I loved that Simon was there to support Julian, as well as Robbie.
Another thing that was unique about this story was the presence of Liam and Clay, two characters from Julian’s books, I loved watching them interact with Julian and the author made me want to read their series and get to know them better.
This was an enjoyable story that I’d can definitely recommend!
*copy kindly provided by Dreamspinner Press for my reading enjoyment*
I’m not quite sure how I missed this story by JP Barnaby, but I sure am glad I found it! This was a sweet and lovely read. Sad, but also filled with hope and so much love. I absolutely adored Julian and Simon and l loved watching them with little Robbie.
Robbie’s illness brings up a lot of memories, although my daughter didn’t need a heart transplant, she did have open heart surgery at 9 months old and I remember the fear and uncertainty of not knowing if she would make it to, and later through, surgery. Asking the doctors for reassurances and hitting a brick wall and I definitely remember the screeching of that damned apnea monitor, and while it was annoying, it was also a security letting you know your baby was still alive. I thought the author’s handling of Robbie’s illness was authentic and well done.
This was an enjoyable read, well-written and filled with emotion. Simon and Julian were wonderful guys and I loved that they found one another. They had amazing chemistry and I loved that Simon was there to support Julian, as well as Robbie.
Another thing that was unique about this story was the presence of Liam and Clay, two characters from Julian’s books, I loved watching them interact with Julian and the author made me want to read their series and get to know them better.
This was an enjoyable story that I’d can definitely recommend!
*copy kindly provided by Dreamspinner Press for my reading enjoyment*
November 30, 2015
I knew going in, given the blurb and cover image, that this would be a tearjerker.
And it was.
But it was also a story of hope, love, and family, and fighting for your child's life with everything you have and everything you can, even if it means stepping on people's toes and pushing your way through whatever red tape the insurance companies will throw at you.
When Julian Holmes' son Robbie is born, via surrogate, with a heart defect that would require surgery and a donor heart to save his life, Julian begins the fight of his life - to save his child.
While still in the hospital, he meets Simon Phelps, who is the insurance coordinator. Simon is gay and still very much in the closet, but falls hard and fast for the reclusive author.
With finesse and heart, J.P. Barnaby delivers a story that is at once heart-warming and heartbreaking. With fully fleshed out characters, and a well-rounded supporting cast, A Heart For Robbie tells not only the story of a father fighting for his son to live, but also gives us a sweet love story between two men who are both very lonely, but unsure how to find what they are looking for.
Though the romance itself takes a backseat - it develops, it is, it causes some issues, but it's never at the forefront of the book. Reading this book as a parent myself was difficult - to imagine the fear, confusion and pain of being told that your newborn child might not live for but a few months, that your little innocent baby needs a donor heart to even make it to his first birthday, that you might not even get to take him home.
Julian was very realistically portrayed, and if you know J.P. well enough, you would know that his character's experiences, feelings and thoughts are likely modeled very closely to her own story. That in itself, knowing this while reading, was enough to make me cry. There is so much sorrow between the lines, so much pain and grief, that it was at times a heart-wrenching read.
Simon was also well done, fearing the reaction of his family and friends if he were to come out, fearful of it being held against him at work, and scared to live outside of the closet. The burden of keeping your sexuality a secret has to be crushing, and I'm glad that Simon found his way into being himself, being who he is.
Considering the not so small issue with the professional ethics of having a relationship with the father of a patient, which caused a big issue toward the end, I was rather surprised that Simon decided to pursue Julian despite his misgivings. It smacked slightly of instalove, but I'm a romantic at heart and believed that sometimes, you find exactly who you were looking for, even if the circumstances aren't the best. And that kind of love doesn't come along all that often, so you should grab it when you find it, and fight to keep it.
The writing flows well, is detailed but not overly so, and the words painted a realistic and believable picture of a terrible and terrifying situation. I was glad that Julian at least had supportive parents and friends, and I even forgave him for being not so nice to his friend, who was also the surrogate. She had a horrible experience just the same, but I understood that Julian's focus was on Robbie, so much so that conventional niceties were no longer important.
I also enjoyed the similarities between the two characters - one out and proud, but terrified and stricken by fear and grief, the other in the closet, terrified of being found out. Their love story also provided a much needed reprieve from the ordeal Julian and his son are going through, and it was woven nearly perfectly into the main storyline.
It's not an easy book to read, and I wouldn't recommend it as a fun summer beach read, but it's a book well worth your time. For every sad moment the author breaks your heart, she's also giving you another happy moment to make you smile, and never loses the focus of her tale - that of hope, love and a parent's fight for his child.
I very much appreciated the epilogue, and closed the file on my Nook with a smile.
And yet, I cried because I wish that the author herself had gotten that sort of happy ending too.
Thankfully and luckily, in this book, Julian has the means to pay for the medical expenses - so many others don't.
** I received a free copy of this book from the author. A positive review was not promised in return. **
And it was.
But it was also a story of hope, love, and family, and fighting for your child's life with everything you have and everything you can, even if it means stepping on people's toes and pushing your way through whatever red tape the insurance companies will throw at you.
When Julian Holmes' son Robbie is born, via surrogate, with a heart defect that would require surgery and a donor heart to save his life, Julian begins the fight of his life - to save his child.
While still in the hospital, he meets Simon Phelps, who is the insurance coordinator. Simon is gay and still very much in the closet, but falls hard and fast for the reclusive author.
With finesse and heart, J.P. Barnaby delivers a story that is at once heart-warming and heartbreaking. With fully fleshed out characters, and a well-rounded supporting cast, A Heart For Robbie tells not only the story of a father fighting for his son to live, but also gives us a sweet love story between two men who are both very lonely, but unsure how to find what they are looking for.
Though the romance itself takes a backseat - it develops, it is, it causes some issues, but it's never at the forefront of the book. Reading this book as a parent myself was difficult - to imagine the fear, confusion and pain of being told that your newborn child might not live for but a few months, that your little innocent baby needs a donor heart to even make it to his first birthday, that you might not even get to take him home.
Julian was very realistically portrayed, and if you know J.P. well enough, you would know that his character's experiences, feelings and thoughts are likely modeled very closely to her own story. That in itself, knowing this while reading, was enough to make me cry. There is so much sorrow between the lines, so much pain and grief, that it was at times a heart-wrenching read.
Simon was also well done, fearing the reaction of his family and friends if he were to come out, fearful of it being held against him at work, and scared to live outside of the closet. The burden of keeping your sexuality a secret has to be crushing, and I'm glad that Simon found his way into being himself, being who he is.
Considering the not so small issue with the professional ethics of having a relationship with the father of a patient, which caused a big issue toward the end, I was rather surprised that Simon decided to pursue Julian despite his misgivings. It smacked slightly of instalove, but I'm a romantic at heart and believed that sometimes, you find exactly who you were looking for, even if the circumstances aren't the best. And that kind of love doesn't come along all that often, so you should grab it when you find it, and fight to keep it.
The writing flows well, is detailed but not overly so, and the words painted a realistic and believable picture of a terrible and terrifying situation. I was glad that Julian at least had supportive parents and friends, and I even forgave him for being not so nice to his friend, who was also the surrogate. She had a horrible experience just the same, but I understood that Julian's focus was on Robbie, so much so that conventional niceties were no longer important.
I also enjoyed the similarities between the two characters - one out and proud, but terrified and stricken by fear and grief, the other in the closet, terrified of being found out. Their love story also provided a much needed reprieve from the ordeal Julian and his son are going through, and it was woven nearly perfectly into the main storyline.
It's not an easy book to read, and I wouldn't recommend it as a fun summer beach read, but it's a book well worth your time. For every sad moment the author breaks your heart, she's also giving you another happy moment to make you smile, and never loses the focus of her tale - that of hope, love and a parent's fight for his child.
I very much appreciated the epilogue, and closed the file on my Nook with a smile.
And yet, I cried because I wish that the author herself had gotten that sort of happy ending too.
Thankfully and luckily, in this book, Julian has the means to pay for the medical expenses - so many others don't.
** I received a free copy of this book from the author. A positive review was not promised in return. **
July 11, 2014
I received my copy from the author.
Some books touch me so deeply I find it almost impossible to write a review. ‘A Heart for Robbie’ is such a book. No matter how hard I think about it, no matter how often I start this review I can’t seem to find the words to convey exactly what this book did to me. I don’t seem to have the language to explain everything I thought and felt while reading this story. I’ll try though because I do want to share my love for this book and admiration for the author with as wide an audience as possible.
‘A Heart for Robbie’ is a book with several layers all of which are fully developed and brought to a plausible and satisfactory conclusion. First and foremost this is little Robbie’s story. We watch his father, Julian, as he tries to come to grips with the unimaginable; his much wanted baby boy, born with a heart defect. Because there is no way to understand or accept that the child you love so dearly and wanted so badly may not live to see his first birthday. You don’t come to terms with that. All you can do is deal as best you can; bestow all your love on the child while you hope for a miracle. And that’s where it all gets extra poignant because the miracle you are waiting for means another child has to die. You feel your own heart breaking as your child gets sicker and know exactly how devastated a parent is when they are faced with the loss of a child and yet, that is what you have to pin your hopes on.
Julian’s emotions are described with such clarity the reader can almost feel them – I say almost because I don’t think anyone can really imagine what it is like to (almost) lose a child unless they’ve actually been through that experience. And yet this book isn’t all doom and gloom. Julian lives as normal a life as he can with Robbie. He goes through all the worries and anxieties all new parents face, except that his are amplified because of Robbie’s condition. The fact that the reader does recognise so many of those first-time parent moments, means that it is easier to identify with Julian while it also allows the reader to take a quick breather occasionally.
I loved Simon’s part of the story. The poor man is so afraid of losing his parents and ending up all alone that he’d rather live a lie. And yet, the moment his secrecy might make Robbie’s situation even more precarious than it already is, he puts his own concerns behind him and steps up to the plate. In fact all of Julian and Simon’s love story was a joy to read. It was a great way of showing that even during the most tragic of times life does go on. That wonderful things can and do happen even in the midst of nightmares. The relationship gave Julian the strength to keep on putting one foot in front of the other and the reader the opportunity to keep on reading without drowning in a black hole of sadness.
This book could easily have been an unrelenting tear-jerker. The fact that it isn’t is testament to the wonderful craftsmanship of J.P. Barnaby. She introduced exactly the right amount of lighter touches to keep this very poignant story both realistic and bearable. I loved the way Julian could see the characters from his book and have conversations with them, even if it did also show exactly how lonely the man was. I adored the fact that Liam, the main character from Julian’s young adult books wore a Sinner’s Gin T-shirt; a nice wink in the direction of Rhys Ford.
Of course the real heartbreak comes when you realise that this story is based on, and dedicated, to Kaitlyn, the baby daughter J.P. Barnaby lost almost two decades ago. I’ll never know where she found the strength and courage to write this story. I do know the world is a better place because she did. This reader is grateful and feels privileged to have been allowed to read this powerful, beautiful, and life-affirming story.
On a different note, if J.P. Barnaby ever feels inclined to write those Black Heart stories I for one would be delighted to read them.
Some books touch me so deeply I find it almost impossible to write a review. ‘A Heart for Robbie’ is such a book. No matter how hard I think about it, no matter how often I start this review I can’t seem to find the words to convey exactly what this book did to me. I don’t seem to have the language to explain everything I thought and felt while reading this story. I’ll try though because I do want to share my love for this book and admiration for the author with as wide an audience as possible.
‘A Heart for Robbie’ is a book with several layers all of which are fully developed and brought to a plausible and satisfactory conclusion. First and foremost this is little Robbie’s story. We watch his father, Julian, as he tries to come to grips with the unimaginable; his much wanted baby boy, born with a heart defect. Because there is no way to understand or accept that the child you love so dearly and wanted so badly may not live to see his first birthday. You don’t come to terms with that. All you can do is deal as best you can; bestow all your love on the child while you hope for a miracle. And that’s where it all gets extra poignant because the miracle you are waiting for means another child has to die. You feel your own heart breaking as your child gets sicker and know exactly how devastated a parent is when they are faced with the loss of a child and yet, that is what you have to pin your hopes on.
Julian’s emotions are described with such clarity the reader can almost feel them – I say almost because I don’t think anyone can really imagine what it is like to (almost) lose a child unless they’ve actually been through that experience. And yet this book isn’t all doom and gloom. Julian lives as normal a life as he can with Robbie. He goes through all the worries and anxieties all new parents face, except that his are amplified because of Robbie’s condition. The fact that the reader does recognise so many of those first-time parent moments, means that it is easier to identify with Julian while it also allows the reader to take a quick breather occasionally.
I loved Simon’s part of the story. The poor man is so afraid of losing his parents and ending up all alone that he’d rather live a lie. And yet, the moment his secrecy might make Robbie’s situation even more precarious than it already is, he puts his own concerns behind him and steps up to the plate. In fact all of Julian and Simon’s love story was a joy to read. It was a great way of showing that even during the most tragic of times life does go on. That wonderful things can and do happen even in the midst of nightmares. The relationship gave Julian the strength to keep on putting one foot in front of the other and the reader the opportunity to keep on reading without drowning in a black hole of sadness.
This book could easily have been an unrelenting tear-jerker. The fact that it isn’t is testament to the wonderful craftsmanship of J.P. Barnaby. She introduced exactly the right amount of lighter touches to keep this very poignant story both realistic and bearable. I loved the way Julian could see the characters from his book and have conversations with them, even if it did also show exactly how lonely the man was. I adored the fact that Liam, the main character from Julian’s young adult books wore a Sinner’s Gin T-shirt; a nice wink in the direction of Rhys Ford.
Of course the real heartbreak comes when you realise that this story is based on, and dedicated, to Kaitlyn, the baby daughter J.P. Barnaby lost almost two decades ago. I’ll never know where she found the strength and courage to write this story. I do know the world is a better place because she did. This reader is grateful and feels privileged to have been allowed to read this powerful, beautiful, and life-affirming story.
On a different note, if J.P. Barnaby ever feels inclined to write those Black Heart stories I for one would be delighted to read them.
July 11, 2014
Anyone who knows the story behind the story of A Heart for Robbie knows this is a novel that’s very close to JP Barnaby’s own heart, and reading this novel with the bias of a parent is heart-wrenching. Reading this novel with the objectivity of a reviewer is uplifting. Reading this novel simply as a human being, parent or not, is an emotional paradox. It’s an odd juxtaposition to look at a book from such divergent points of view, but it’s one of the things that makes A Heart for Robbie a beautiful experience—as a parent, I empathized with Julian Holmes and the agony he experiences throughout the journey to save his son; as a human being I felt so much compassion for Julian’s experience and the horrific possibility of losing a child, all the inadequacy and helplessness and anger and terror that goes along with it, especially the overwhelming guilt of knowing that another child must die in order for your child to live; as a reader I was elated the author was able to rewrite the ending she didn’t get in life, and give her characters all the joy and happiness that can be found when miracles happen. But that’s the true beauty of fiction, isn’t it, the ability to give a happy ending to the realities that aren’t always so benevolent or forgiving in real life?
The emotional contrast that works so well in A Heart for Robbie is the love story not only between a father and his son but also between Julian and Simon Phelps, the hospital’s insurance coordinator and a man who, for reasons of professional ethics, should’ve been off limits. Though Simon never denies his sexuality to himself—he’s fully accepted that he’s a gay man—he very much hides it from his co-workers, friends, family, and I have to confess that I worried a bit about how JP Barnaby would work that conflict into a story that was already so heavy with emotion, but the answer is that Julian and Simon falling in love was woven into the story perfectly, giving the plot the balance it needed between hope and heartache. When Simon finally meets Julian and the two men realize there’s a spark there, the fact that Julian is able to find happiness during one of the most terrifying ordeals any parent can face was the perfect contrast to Simon’s fear of coming out. When Simon is given the opportunity to put things into perspective, it was a moment that made me want to cheer for him.
A Heart for Robbie isn’t what I’d call a light summer read, but it is a story where light is found in a dark time. There are so many things that make this book highly recommendable: JP Barnaby makes certain that all the while she’s breaking your heart just a little, she’s also working hard to stitch it back together again, which is very much what she does for Julian. There is no angst for the sake of angst, but there is love for the sake of love, hope for the sake of hope, and happiness for the sake of a parent’s love for his child. There are tears and there are smiles, there are smiles through tears—Julian’s, Simon’s, and yes, maybe I shed a few myself, but there’s no better way to get to a happily ever after, as far as I’m concerned, than to feel my way to it one word at a time, and that’s what this book does.
The emotional contrast that works so well in A Heart for Robbie is the love story not only between a father and his son but also between Julian and Simon Phelps, the hospital’s insurance coordinator and a man who, for reasons of professional ethics, should’ve been off limits. Though Simon never denies his sexuality to himself—he’s fully accepted that he’s a gay man—he very much hides it from his co-workers, friends, family, and I have to confess that I worried a bit about how JP Barnaby would work that conflict into a story that was already so heavy with emotion, but the answer is that Julian and Simon falling in love was woven into the story perfectly, giving the plot the balance it needed between hope and heartache. When Simon finally meets Julian and the two men realize there’s a spark there, the fact that Julian is able to find happiness during one of the most terrifying ordeals any parent can face was the perfect contrast to Simon’s fear of coming out. When Simon is given the opportunity to put things into perspective, it was a moment that made me want to cheer for him.
A Heart for Robbie isn’t what I’d call a light summer read, but it is a story where light is found in a dark time. There are so many things that make this book highly recommendable: JP Barnaby makes certain that all the while she’s breaking your heart just a little, she’s also working hard to stitch it back together again, which is very much what she does for Julian. There is no angst for the sake of angst, but there is love for the sake of love, hope for the sake of hope, and happiness for the sake of a parent’s love for his child. There are tears and there are smiles, there are smiles through tears—Julian’s, Simon’s, and yes, maybe I shed a few myself, but there’s no better way to get to a happily ever after, as far as I’m concerned, than to feel my way to it one word at a time, and that’s what this book does.
July 16, 2014
5 STARS
Reviewed by Dani
Incredible, sincere, real, heart breaking, heart-wrenching, sad, uplifting, hope, character, strength, love, support, drama, relationships, friendship, hurt, courage, emotions…
There are just a few of the words that come to mind after reading this powerful book.
In a way I feel honored that I had the opportunity to read this story. It’s so emotional…so complete and so much more than just a novel.
Reading the blurb I cannot deny I was a little scared of what this story would put me through as a reader. I mean, the high level of emotions are already there in that short premise.
And the emotions I got were all over the room. This book had me shivering in fear, clutching my own hand in hope, bawling like a child in despair and shining in love.
We meet Julian as he is about to become a daddy through surrogacy with his best friend Erin, who gives him the gift of Robbie. But Robbie is not well. He has a major heart condition and the long struggle begins for Robbie, Julian and their family and friends.
During this he meets Simon who works at the hospital and where they meet again when Simon steps up for Julian when the father is at his lowest in worrying about Robbie. Things get out of control and they both give in to their urge to be together. Out of this tragedy with Robbie there grows something incredibly beautiful between both men, found in loneliness and bringing them together.
To find out what this story brings you on Robbie’s story as well as Julian and Simon’s I would like to encourage you to read this yourself. I can state facts here but I rather choose to go with the emotions and the feeling it gave me as I mentioned in the beginning of this review.
For me this story is a must read. Where I can appreciate the different levels of writing by Miss Barnaby (who is known for the award winning books Aaron and Spencer as well as the Rentboy series to name just a few of her works) this book is on a level of its own. Author J.P Barnaby made something so personal and private into a complete story that will break your heart and built it up from scratch again.
Thank you for sharing this with us although I feel a mere thank you is too little to express
Danielle
Please visit www.lovebytesreviews.com to see this and many more reviews, interviews guest posts and giveaways!
Reviewed by Dani
Incredible, sincere, real, heart breaking, heart-wrenching, sad, uplifting, hope, character, strength, love, support, drama, relationships, friendship, hurt, courage, emotions…
There are just a few of the words that come to mind after reading this powerful book.
In a way I feel honored that I had the opportunity to read this story. It’s so emotional…so complete and so much more than just a novel.
Reading the blurb I cannot deny I was a little scared of what this story would put me through as a reader. I mean, the high level of emotions are already there in that short premise.
And the emotions I got were all over the room. This book had me shivering in fear, clutching my own hand in hope, bawling like a child in despair and shining in love.
We meet Julian as he is about to become a daddy through surrogacy with his best friend Erin, who gives him the gift of Robbie. But Robbie is not well. He has a major heart condition and the long struggle begins for Robbie, Julian and their family and friends.
During this he meets Simon who works at the hospital and where they meet again when Simon steps up for Julian when the father is at his lowest in worrying about Robbie. Things get out of control and they both give in to their urge to be together. Out of this tragedy with Robbie there grows something incredibly beautiful between both men, found in loneliness and bringing them together.
To find out what this story brings you on Robbie’s story as well as Julian and Simon’s I would like to encourage you to read this yourself. I can state facts here but I rather choose to go with the emotions and the feeling it gave me as I mentioned in the beginning of this review.
For me this story is a must read. Where I can appreciate the different levels of writing by Miss Barnaby (who is known for the award winning books Aaron and Spencer as well as the Rentboy series to name just a few of her works) this book is on a level of its own. Author J.P Barnaby made something so personal and private into a complete story that will break your heart and built it up from scratch again.
Thank you for sharing this with us although I feel a mere thank you is too little to express
Danielle
Please visit www.lovebytesreviews.com to see this and many more reviews, interviews guest posts and giveaways!
January 12, 2023
The fact that I knew 'A Heart for Robbie' was going to be an emotional and heartrending story in no way, shape, or form lessened my desire to read it. J.P. Barnaby has written so many different types of books and each one I've read has produced some form of an emotional response, be it tears or laughter. In this book, the author has taken her own real life experience and written about it to share with others. I can't begin to imagine the strength of character that takes. The author has said in an interview that writing about Robbie was therapy and I truly hope she received the catharsis she so truly deserves.
What should be the happiest day of Julian's life, the birth of his son, instead has been filled with fear, anxiety, helplessness, and confusion. Robbie was rushed straight to NICU immediately following his birth as he was struggling to breathe on his own. Then the doctors had Robbie airlifted to the children's hospital for more intense help by a pediatric cardiologist. Through these many hours I can't begin to understand how Julian is feeling. Everyone is rushing around trying so hard to save his son, but Julian has no idea what exactly is wrong or what he needs to be doing. It's so easy for me, as a reader, to want to hate the doctors for being so dispassionate when they tell Julian that Robbie has a serious heart deformity and without a transplant he'll die, but as someone who has spent a lot of time around medical professionals, I understand that's how many of them handle these devastating cases. None of that helps Julian, though, when he's just gotten this miracle and now he could easily lose him, and even if they do the transplant there's no guarantee Robbie will live. A parent’s worst nightmare.
Please find my full review at Rainbow Book Reviews
What should be the happiest day of Julian's life, the birth of his son, instead has been filled with fear, anxiety, helplessness, and confusion. Robbie was rushed straight to NICU immediately following his birth as he was struggling to breathe on his own. Then the doctors had Robbie airlifted to the children's hospital for more intense help by a pediatric cardiologist. Through these many hours I can't begin to understand how Julian is feeling. Everyone is rushing around trying so hard to save his son, but Julian has no idea what exactly is wrong or what he needs to be doing. It's so easy for me, as a reader, to want to hate the doctors for being so dispassionate when they tell Julian that Robbie has a serious heart deformity and without a transplant he'll die, but as someone who has spent a lot of time around medical professionals, I understand that's how many of them handle these devastating cases. None of that helps Julian, though, when he's just gotten this miracle and now he could easily lose him, and even if they do the transplant there's no guarantee Robbie will live. A parent’s worst nightmare.
Please find my full review at Rainbow Book Reviews
February 1, 2015
A typhoon. Heartbreak and hope, teary eyes and warm hearts, fears and smiles; from the symbolism of the perfect cover (daddy bear holding the bandaged little bear) to the perfect mixture of happiness and sadness within its pages, this story will stay with me. It is one of those unique and distinct ones that burrows deep, deep into your heart and brain, thinking of the what-ifs, the catharsis you achieve through reading, and the hurt you feel while you simultaneously enjoy the experience.
This is most definitely a romance, but it is also about the unconditional love between the family you are born with and the family you choose, shown through Julian's family. Simon's family was the foil to that with his mother's very conditional love and acceptance. But the main parts of the book were between Julian, Robbie, and Simon, and it warmed my heart before it hurt it time and again.
Gorgeous, although a challenging story to get through, I definitely recommend it very highly to anyone who can take an emotionally trying story.
This is most definitely a romance, but it is also about the unconditional love between the family you are born with and the family you choose, shown through Julian's family. Simon's family was the foil to that with his mother's very conditional love and acceptance. But the main parts of the book were between Julian, Robbie, and Simon, and it warmed my heart before it hurt it time and again.
Gorgeous, although a challenging story to get through, I definitely recommend it very highly to anyone who can take an emotionally trying story.
July 21, 2014
4.5 stars. In case you didn't notice my tag, let me state the obvious - have tissues handy! This book had so much heart I found it very hard to put down. Loved the romance and the plot (two lonely souls find and support each other in a time of crisis for both of them).
I can't imagine how much harder being alone would have been for Julian to bear the horrible reality of his son's imminent death if a transplant heart was not found for him in time. Yes, he had family support, but they couldn't always be there, and having Simon to talk to and be a constant supporter made a huge difference.
Loved reading how Simon brainstormed his book plots. Not going to spoil it for you, but it added a touch of fantasy (or perhaps a minor touch of insanity - not sure which).
Exceptionally well written in my opinion. Highly recommend!
I can't imagine how much harder being alone would have been for Julian to bear the horrible reality of his son's imminent death if a transplant heart was not found for him in time. Yes, he had family support, but they couldn't always be there, and having Simon to talk to and be a constant supporter made a huge difference.
Loved reading how Simon brainstormed his book plots. Not going to spoil it for you, but it added a touch of fantasy (or perhaps a minor touch of insanity - not sure which).
Exceptionally well written in my opinion. Highly recommend!
February 21, 2016
Oh man. Lovely, heart breaking, and hopeful story. It was not all about Robbie, either. Both Julian and Simon had their own stories to tell. I loved Simon. Such a gentle person to be treated so badly by his mother.
January 31, 2016
I was right. This was a rough read for me, and I cried more over this book than I have for a while. But it was very good.
April 5, 2017
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Un cœur pour Robbie est une histoire qui m’a tout de suite attirée grâce à un résumé poignant sur le parcours de ce père prêt à tout pour sauver la vie de son fils. En tant que mère je me suis rapidement identifiée à Julian, à ses peurs tout en ne pouvant qu’imaginer la douleur à laquelle il a été confronté. Dès les premières lignes, je me suis positionnée à ses côtés avec l’envie de voir comment Jp Barnaby allait donner vie à cette relation dans un contexte aussi éprouvant que celui-ci.
J’aimerais attirer votre attention sur le fait qu’au-delà d’un MM, un cœur pour Robbie est avant tout un récit qui touchera chacun d’entre nous. Tous les parents se reconnaîtront dans les réactions de Julian mais tous ceux qui ne le sont pas encore ne pourront qu’être émus par ses appréhensions.
Ce livre ne se range dans aucune catégorie tant il traite de sujet important. On en occulte rapidement la teneur même de la relation entre Julian et Simon. Pourtant leur rencontre loin d’être idyllique donne naissance à des sentiments intenses, profonds, authentiques. On se laisse emporter par la dévastation émotionnelle qui les balaie et les plonge au cœur de changements irréversibles. L’auteur a su équilibrer son récit entre la complexité de la situation et la recherche de l’autre. Il se dégage énormément de tendresse de ces deux hommes que les épreuves de la vie ont réunis.
Le titre décrit de lui-même ce qui nous attend dans ce livre. L’immersion dans l’univers médical est immédiate. Tout est si bien détaillé que l’on tremble avec Julian, on patiente avec lui dans l’attente de réponses, on se réjouit lorsqu’une lueur d’espoir apparaît et l’on s’effondre lorsque les choses n’évoluent pas dans le bon sens. Avec ce roman c’est toute une myriade d’émotions qui nous submerge. Entre tristesse, joie et impuissance, on vit cette histoire de l’intérieur en même temps que ses personnages.
La force de ce texte se trouve également dans la manière dont l’auteur a abordé l’homosexualité. On se retrouve face à deux situations bien différentes, deux éducations totalement opposées . J’ai trouvé très intéressant le contraste saisissant dont font preuve les parents de Julian et de Simon. On se rend alors compte de la réelle difficulté encore à notre époque de vivre pleinement sa sexualité.
À cœur ouvert est un livre dont on ressort grandi tant la leçon de vie qu’il nous apporte est mémorable. C’est un roman marquant par son intensité et l’expérience à laquelle il nous confronte. J’ai éprouvé tant d’émotions durant ma lecture que je ne suis pas près d’oublier l’histoire captivante de ce couple renversant.
Un cœur pour Robbie est une histoire qui m’a tout de suite attirée grâce à un résumé poignant sur le parcours de ce père prêt à tout pour sauver la vie de son fils. En tant que mère je me suis rapidement identifiée à Julian, à ses peurs tout en ne pouvant qu’imaginer la douleur à laquelle il a été confronté. Dès les premières lignes, je me suis positionnée à ses côtés avec l’envie de voir comment Jp Barnaby allait donner vie à cette relation dans un contexte aussi éprouvant que celui-ci.
J’aimerais attirer votre attention sur le fait qu’au-delà d’un MM, un cœur pour Robbie est avant tout un récit qui touchera chacun d’entre nous. Tous les parents se reconnaîtront dans les réactions de Julian mais tous ceux qui ne le sont pas encore ne pourront qu’être émus par ses appréhensions.
Ce livre ne se range dans aucune catégorie tant il traite de sujet important. On en occulte rapidement la teneur même de la relation entre Julian et Simon. Pourtant leur rencontre loin d’être idyllique donne naissance à des sentiments intenses, profonds, authentiques. On se laisse emporter par la dévastation émotionnelle qui les balaie et les plonge au cœur de changements irréversibles. L’auteur a su équilibrer son récit entre la complexité de la situation et la recherche de l’autre. Il se dégage énormément de tendresse de ces deux hommes que les épreuves de la vie ont réunis.
Le titre décrit de lui-même ce qui nous attend dans ce livre. L’immersion dans l’univers médical est immédiate. Tout est si bien détaillé que l’on tremble avec Julian, on patiente avec lui dans l’attente de réponses, on se réjouit lorsqu’une lueur d’espoir apparaît et l’on s’effondre lorsque les choses n’évoluent pas dans le bon sens. Avec ce roman c’est toute une myriade d’émotions qui nous submerge. Entre tristesse, joie et impuissance, on vit cette histoire de l’intérieur en même temps que ses personnages.
La force de ce texte se trouve également dans la manière dont l’auteur a abordé l’homosexualité. On se retrouve face à deux situations bien différentes, deux éducations totalement opposées . J’ai trouvé très intéressant le contraste saisissant dont font preuve les parents de Julian et de Simon. On se rend alors compte de la réelle difficulté encore à notre époque de vivre pleinement sa sexualité.
À cœur ouvert est un livre dont on ressort grandi tant la leçon de vie qu’il nous apporte est mémorable. C’est un roman marquant par son intensité et l’expérience à laquelle il nous confronte. J’ai éprouvé tant d’émotions durant ma lecture que je ne suis pas près d’oublier l’histoire captivante de ce couple renversant.
March 20, 2018
There wasn't really one glaring thing that made me dislike this book, it was more so just a bunch of little things. The entire process of Julian making a stirfry is described. Thank goodness we were made aware of the fact that he used a wooden spatula, we wouldn't want poor little Robbie to die from BPA before his heart gives out. The whole process is about 3 pages long. And yet it takes all of one sentence to let us know a few months have gone by since Simon & Julian hooked up. I'd rather spend 3 pages reading about Simon & Julian than Simon & Julian's dinner, especially considering 75% of their interaction consists of smut. I'm grateful for the smut and all, but I wish there was more focus on Simon's & Julian's relationship than what some random nurse looks like, or Simon's volunteer work that doesn't serve a lot of purpose, or his two dates with Nancy & her mother, or Julian's conversations with his imaginary friends about his next book. And the fact that only one person reacted to the fact that Julian see & talk to the characters in his books seems a bit weird. Then there is the fact that early on in their acquaintance, while in the hospital cafeteria, Julian tells Simon, a member of his son's medical team that his ex was "a hot little bottom", which just seemed so out of place. So, yeah... I wasn't really a fan, which is a shame because I think this is the first from J.P Barnaby that I haven't enjoyed.
July 11, 2014
The opening line of the synopsis for this book really says it all. Julian Holmes is a single gay man and accomplished author. He longs for a family, for someone to grow old with, children... just someone to love. Along with his best friend of fifteen years, Erin who surrogates for him, he becomes a father. As soon as his precious son is born, his heart is both full to the brim with unconditional love, as well as utter heartbreak. Little Robbie has a heart defect and needs a transplant in order to survive. A so begins the journey of one father to save the life of his newborn son, regardless. Just days after the birth Julian along with his mother, father, best friend Erin and Erin's husband Paul sit before a team of doctors in suits that will decide the fate of his son.
Simon Phelps is a closeted Insurance Specialist that works for the hospital that will be performing the transplant and caring for Robbie in the interim. Simon has personal issues of his own to contend with, and while there is something about the man who would do anything for his son that calls to him, Simon realizes the improbability of taking the attraction any further. For one, he's securely resting in his closet, for another he fears his families rejection as well as work and volunteer activities dismissing him because he is gay. And let's not forget the whole fraternizing with patients or patients sexy dads clause that is in his contract.
When a routine procedure becomes more urgent and Robbie is admitted to ICU, the relationship between Julian and Simon becomes more intimate. Both men struggle with the ramifications of pursuing their mutual attraction past a would be one night stand, and both men come to the same conclusion. They both long for love and companionship, for someone they can trust in their life. So throwing caution partially to the wind, they decide to see where things go, but maintain secrecy as much as possible. When the relationship is discovered, Robbie's care is threatened because of the implications of both men's position as an employee of the hospital and the father of a patient. At that point, Simon makes a life altering decision that will change everything going forward.
This book, Oh my lord this book! This story struck a nerve for me as my best friend gave birth to her daughter eight weeks premature. So we did the rounds in the NICU, and there were similar conversations with doctors about progress and options and outcomes. So the line between reality and fiction completely blurred for me while I was reading this book. I think that Barnaby hit every nail on the head within the story. The grief of the parent at the news that your child has a lifetime of challenges ahead, if they even survive. The need to have someone in your life that you can trust and love, that is the definition of Julian and Simon's relationship. There was passion and love, but it was always in the right place, there was never anything inappropriate when it came to separating or mixing the lives each man led. Strong secondary characters built a foundation that surrounded Julian, Robbie and Simon and it was such an engaging, intriguing and unique story that I was drawn in immediately, and my interest was held until the last page.
Yes, I recommend this book, even if you aren't a fan of the genre, just be sure you have some kleenex on hand because there will be tears, and they will come almost immediately.
Simon Phelps is a closeted Insurance Specialist that works for the hospital that will be performing the transplant and caring for Robbie in the interim. Simon has personal issues of his own to contend with, and while there is something about the man who would do anything for his son that calls to him, Simon realizes the improbability of taking the attraction any further. For one, he's securely resting in his closet, for another he fears his families rejection as well as work and volunteer activities dismissing him because he is gay. And let's not forget the whole fraternizing with patients or patients sexy dads clause that is in his contract.
When a routine procedure becomes more urgent and Robbie is admitted to ICU, the relationship between Julian and Simon becomes more intimate. Both men struggle with the ramifications of pursuing their mutual attraction past a would be one night stand, and both men come to the same conclusion. They both long for love and companionship, for someone they can trust in their life. So throwing caution partially to the wind, they decide to see where things go, but maintain secrecy as much as possible. When the relationship is discovered, Robbie's care is threatened because of the implications of both men's position as an employee of the hospital and the father of a patient. At that point, Simon makes a life altering decision that will change everything going forward.
This book, Oh my lord this book! This story struck a nerve for me as my best friend gave birth to her daughter eight weeks premature. So we did the rounds in the NICU, and there were similar conversations with doctors about progress and options and outcomes. So the line between reality and fiction completely blurred for me while I was reading this book. I think that Barnaby hit every nail on the head within the story. The grief of the parent at the news that your child has a lifetime of challenges ahead, if they even survive. The need to have someone in your life that you can trust and love, that is the definition of Julian and Simon's relationship. There was passion and love, but it was always in the right place, there was never anything inappropriate when it came to separating or mixing the lives each man led. Strong secondary characters built a foundation that surrounded Julian, Robbie and Simon and it was such an engaging, intriguing and unique story that I was drawn in immediately, and my interest was held until the last page.
Yes, I recommend this book, even if you aren't a fan of the genre, just be sure you have some kleenex on hand because there will be tears, and they will come almost immediately.
December 7, 2015
3 stars - Heartwrenching but still not quite so.
A part from the heartwrenching main story, there's something that hit very close home to me and that ultimately made me feel this book a little bit more than I would have otherwise: Julien seeing his characters.
There has been a time during my teenage hood where I felt so alone and lost that I couldn't reach out to anyone around me. It wasn't like people didn't care about me, I had my parents, always, but despite that I felt like I was alone in the universe because I had lost the most important person in my life. That loneliness brought Bill to life. I would greet him first thing in the morning, talk to him when I broke down and hid away, talk to him in my head but also on my diary with a green pen - that was reserved for his answers only. Sometimes I wouldn't be able to sleep without hearing him singing or embracing me or both. I was never oblivious to the fact that he was still me. That I was the one using that green pen and imagining things, I was always aware of the fact that Bill was no one other than the strong part of myself who was trying its hardest to keep me going. So reading about Liam keeping it together when Julien breaks did something for me.
There were a lot of things that I loved about this book, all the little issues mentioned and solved in time without really addressing them. It was good reading about them. It was good reading about Julien and Simon finding home in each other and becoming a family almost naturally.
Despite appreciating where the book went, I didn't enjoy it how I thought I would. I can't say that there was something that I didn't like, because there really wasn't. The pace was probably a bit slow at the beginning but I read everything pretty smoothly anyway, the characters were okay, I could relate, intimate moments were hot and heartwarming enough, I have no real complains about this book.
Somehow, I still can't bring myself to give it more than 3 stars. It was a good reading, but not one I would do again. It was touching for the theme it addressed, but I was never really touched during the book, I didn't shred a tear, didn't smile during any part of it, not that I can remember and not visibly. In my mind? Sure, I was enjoying it and finding a lot of things really adorable, but there was never that little spark more to bring me to react outside of the realm of my mind. It didn't... touch my feelings as much as I was expecting it too and that somehow disappointed me.
I can't really pinpoint what was missing to me, I just know that whatever it was wasn't there.
A part from the heartwrenching main story, there's something that hit very close home to me and that ultimately made me feel this book a little bit more than I would have otherwise: Julien seeing his characters.
There has been a time during my teenage hood where I felt so alone and lost that I couldn't reach out to anyone around me. It wasn't like people didn't care about me, I had my parents, always, but despite that I felt like I was alone in the universe because I had lost the most important person in my life. That loneliness brought Bill to life. I would greet him first thing in the morning, talk to him when I broke down and hid away, talk to him in my head but also on my diary with a green pen - that was reserved for his answers only. Sometimes I wouldn't be able to sleep without hearing him singing or embracing me or both. I was never oblivious to the fact that he was still me. That I was the one using that green pen and imagining things, I was always aware of the fact that Bill was no one other than the strong part of myself who was trying its hardest to keep me going. So reading about Liam keeping it together when Julien breaks did something for me.
There were a lot of things that I loved about this book, all the little issues mentioned and solved in time without really addressing them. It was good reading about them. It was good reading about Julien and Simon finding home in each other and becoming a family almost naturally.
Despite appreciating where the book went, I didn't enjoy it how I thought I would. I can't say that there was something that I didn't like, because there really wasn't. The pace was probably a bit slow at the beginning but I read everything pretty smoothly anyway, the characters were okay, I could relate, intimate moments were hot and heartwarming enough, I have no real complains about this book.
Somehow, I still can't bring myself to give it more than 3 stars. It was a good reading, but not one I would do again. It was touching for the theme it addressed, but I was never really touched during the book, I didn't shred a tear, didn't smile during any part of it, not that I can remember and not visibly. In my mind? Sure, I was enjoying it and finding a lot of things really adorable, but there was never that little spark more to bring me to react outside of the realm of my mind. It didn't... touch my feelings as much as I was expecting it too and that somehow disappointed me.
I can't really pinpoint what was missing to me, I just know that whatever it was wasn't there.
July 17, 2014
This is a beautiful book... sad and sweet and perfect.
The smooth relationship that develops between Julian and Simon is oddly not dramatic. They fit together perfectly and nothing slows them down once they start to see each other. There is lots of drama in this story, certainly, but it isn't in the relationship between the two men. They stand firmly together.
The drama is all external to their relationship, if that makes any sense. Julian's world is collapsing, his long awaited son is born with a heart defect and needs a heart transplant to survive. He meets Simon during the process at the hospital, and they tentatively being a relationship. Simon is drawn in to their world, falling in love with not only Julian, but baby Robbie as well. He has family issues that crop up though, as well as some work issues (skirting around spoilers here!) that affect Julian and Robbie dramatically. In some ways Simon has more issues than Julian, who is focused solely on saving Robbie's life.
There are good bits and sad bits, drama with Robbie, family issues, work problems, and some nasty homophobic idiots, all coming together to create a wonderful, moving story. As is the case with a lot of JP's series, it was beautiful but painful. I teared up multiple times, I had to stop reading once, but oh... the ending is worth it. If you follow JP on any social media sites, you know how close this book was to her. It was hard to read knowing she went through this as a young mother, but had a very different outcome. She is a strong person, an incredible writer, and deserves nothing but happiness.
The smooth relationship that develops between Julian and Simon is oddly not dramatic. They fit together perfectly and nothing slows them down once they start to see each other. There is lots of drama in this story, certainly, but it isn't in the relationship between the two men. They stand firmly together.
The drama is all external to their relationship, if that makes any sense. Julian's world is collapsing, his long awaited son is born with a heart defect and needs a heart transplant to survive. He meets Simon during the process at the hospital, and they tentatively being a relationship. Simon is drawn in to their world, falling in love with not only Julian, but baby Robbie as well. He has family issues that crop up though, as well as some work issues (skirting around spoilers here!) that affect Julian and Robbie dramatically. In some ways Simon has more issues than Julian, who is focused solely on saving Robbie's life.
There are good bits and sad bits, drama with Robbie, family issues, work problems, and some nasty homophobic idiots, all coming together to create a wonderful, moving story. As is the case with a lot of JP's series, it was beautiful but painful. I teared up multiple times, I had to stop reading once, but oh... the ending is worth it. If you follow JP on any social media sites, you know how close this book was to her. It was hard to read knowing she went through this as a young mother, but had a very different outcome. She is a strong person, an incredible writer, and deserves nothing but happiness.
November 15, 2014
It took me awhile to get to this one because I have had the same opinion on every one of J.P.'s books I have read, and unfortunately this one went the same way.
The first 40 percent, although heartbreaking, was very slow and repetitive. It wasn't until Simon and Julian began interacting that the book picked up and gained some much needed depth. This first part, as in all her books, is spent filling the reader in on the characters and their lives. I would love to see the author write where all this is more subtly weaved into the story, rather than dumped on the readers heads all in 80 or so pages. But that is just me.
I also had some issues with Simon being such a doormat. But knowing this still is the case in some instances, I suspended belief.
I couldn't, however, suspend belief when the center Simon volunteered at suspended not one, but two men from the program because they were gay. In big city (Chicago for instance) programs, especially ones of the nature in this book, this just DOES NOT happen.
Those points made, this is a very well written, researched book. One I am sure even J.P. shed more than a tear or two writing. It will break your heart then rebuild it and break it again, but only for a chapter or two. All in all I enjoyed this book, read it fast, and recommend it to anyone who can deal with the rollercoaster of emotions having a sick child takes you through.
The first 40 percent, although heartbreaking, was very slow and repetitive. It wasn't until Simon and Julian began interacting that the book picked up and gained some much needed depth. This first part, as in all her books, is spent filling the reader in on the characters and their lives. I would love to see the author write where all this is more subtly weaved into the story, rather than dumped on the readers heads all in 80 or so pages. But that is just me.
I also had some issues with Simon being such a doormat. But knowing this still is the case in some instances, I suspended belief.
I couldn't, however, suspend belief when the center Simon volunteered at suspended not one, but two men from the program because they were gay. In big city (Chicago for instance) programs, especially ones of the nature in this book, this just DOES NOT happen.
Those points made, this is a very well written, researched book. One I am sure even J.P. shed more than a tear or two writing. It will break your heart then rebuild it and break it again, but only for a chapter or two. All in all I enjoyed this book, read it fast, and recommend it to anyone who can deal with the rollercoaster of emotions having a sick child takes you through.
June 2, 2015
A great book, a beautiful story! I loved it so much!
There are so many things in this story. Love for Robbie, love between Julian and Simon, love from Julian's parents, love from Erin and his husband (not easy to accept that your wife carries a child for someone other, even a dear friend). Angst, fear for this sick baby boy, sadness, joy when change occurs... Acceptance and rebellion against the fate... It's also about the long, painful and difficult journey that the relatives have to do with their seriously ill child, not only the pain, the angst, the fear but also the administrative red tape... And the guilty to know you are waiting for another child's death (not an easy feeling for sure...).
As often,
There are so many things in this story. Love for Robbie, love between Julian and Simon, love from Julian's parents, love from Erin and his husband (not easy to accept that your wife carries a child for someone other, even a dear friend). Angst, fear for this sick baby boy, sadness, joy when change occurs... Acceptance and rebellion against the fate... It's also about the long, painful and difficult journey that the relatives have to do with their seriously ill child, not only the pain, the angst, the fear but also the administrative red tape... And the guilty to know you are waiting for another child's death (not an easy feeling for sure...).
As often,
August 4, 2014
A Joyfully Jay review.
4.5 stars
A Heart for Robbie is a beautifully written and heartwarming story and I really loved it. Barnaby manages to perfectly walk the line between creating a poignant and meaningful story about a sick child without leading us into something too overwhelming or depressing. Don’t get me wrong — when poor little Robbie is sick and Julian is desperate to help him, it is truly heartbreaking. But overall the story is warm and full of love and very rewarding.
Read Jay’s review in its entirety here.
4.5 stars
A Heart for Robbie is a beautifully written and heartwarming story and I really loved it. Barnaby manages to perfectly walk the line between creating a poignant and meaningful story about a sick child without leading us into something too overwhelming or depressing. Don’t get me wrong — when poor little Robbie is sick and Julian is desperate to help him, it is truly heartbreaking. But overall the story is warm and full of love and very rewarding.
Read Jay’s review in its entirety here.
July 7, 2016
I was avoiding reading it because it didn't seem like the kind of light/happy read I was really into, but I found that I enjoyed it all the same. Even if it did end up making me cry. I have never really gotten the need to procreate, and heaven only knows that I can't stand most children, but there is just something about Julian and his love for his son that really gets to me. This was very well written, and I got so caught up in the story I almost finished it in one sitting. A Heart for Robbie is something I would definitely recommend you give a try.
4.5 stars
4.5 stars
June 23, 2017
C'est un livre poignant, bouleversant. Une leçon de vie. Une claque émotionnelle. Je retardais cette lecture et en ayant parler avec une personne celle-ci m'avait convaincu. Je pensais le sujet dur, et j'ai du mal avec ce genre de lecture. Mais au final OMG j'aurais dû le lire bien avant. C'est un énorme coup de cœur pour ma part. Les personnages sont attachants très différents les uns des autres. Mais au final une seule chose les font avancer Robbie. Un petit être qui sans le savoir distribue/ sème de l'amour sur son passage. Le combat d'un père, le combat d'une vie...
July 12, 2014
So, so bittersweet.
Fans of J.P. will know the backstory to this book, and the ending is what makes it bittersweet for me.
************************************POSSIBLE SPOILER***********************************
Trish, I wish you had gotten your happy ending too. Now the tears come as I write this note you may never see, but the story just breaks my heart.
Love and Light thru your life.
Fans of J.P. will know the backstory to this book, and the ending is what makes it bittersweet for me.
************************************POSSIBLE SPOILER***********************************
Trish, I wish you had gotten your happy ending too. Now the tears come as I write this note you may never see, but the story just breaks my heart.
Love and Light thru your life.
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