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Immortally Sexy #1
Date Me, Baby, One More Time
Derek has a simple assignment: find the Guardian, kill her, and break the curse. Too bad she's immortal, great with a sword, and distractingly adorable.
"A wild ride of fun, fantasy and romance!" ~J.R. Ward, #1 New York Times bestselling author
Immortal guardian Justine Bennet has one duty: keep a powerful magical item out of the hands of troublemakers, like, oh, the leader of hell. The eternity of celibacy that goes with her job? Something that would have been nice to know before she signed up for it.
Then Derek LaValle, a no-carb pretzel mogul, shows up at her door to behead her, which is the only way to save his twin from a deadly curse. Derek's charming, tempting-as-hell, and extremely determined, all the things that Justine needs to amp up her life.
Unfortunately, if Justine lets him live, her mom will end up as Satan's love pancake. But if Derek doesn't kill her, his twin will die in a week.
When high-octane attraction blooms between them, a dramatic fight to the death no longer feels like such a fantastic option. But with such high stakes, they better figure it out fast, or Satan dating her mom will become the least of their worries.
RITA® Award Nominee for Best Paranormal Romance
Note: This book was originally released under the title Date Me, Baby, One More Time by Warner Books, and then under the title Immortally Cursed. It was briefly listed under Stephanie's former pen name, S.A. Bayne.
"A wild ride of fun, fantasy and romance!" ~J.R. Ward, #1 New York Times bestselling author
Immortal guardian Justine Bennet has one duty: keep a powerful magical item out of the hands of troublemakers, like, oh, the leader of hell. The eternity of celibacy that goes with her job? Something that would have been nice to know before she signed up for it.
Then Derek LaValle, a no-carb pretzel mogul, shows up at her door to behead her, which is the only way to save his twin from a deadly curse. Derek's charming, tempting-as-hell, and extremely determined, all the things that Justine needs to amp up her life.
Unfortunately, if Justine lets him live, her mom will end up as Satan's love pancake. But if Derek doesn't kill her, his twin will die in a week.
When high-octane attraction blooms between them, a dramatic fight to the death no longer feels like such a fantastic option. But with such high stakes, they better figure it out fast, or Satan dating her mom will become the least of their worries.
RITA® Award Nominee for Best Paranormal Romance
Note: This book was originally released under the title Date Me, Baby, One More Time by Warner Books, and then under the title Immortally Cursed. It was briefly listed under Stephanie's former pen name, S.A. Bayne.
324 pages, Mass Market Paperback
First published May 1, 2006
296 people are currently reading
3179 people want to read
About the author
Stephanie Rowe
112 books1,537 followersHailed as a "paranormal star!" by J.R. Ward, Stephanie Rowe is the New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of more than forty-five novels. She is the 2018 RITA® winner for Best Paranormal Romance, as well as a five-time nominee for this prestigious award. For more on Stephanie and her books, visit her at www.stephaneierowe.com, or on facebook at https://www.facebook.com/StephanieRow....
A life-long reader, she began crafting stories at age ten, but didn't realize it was her dream until she was an adult.
Once the light dawned, she immediately left behind "work" as the world defines it and went to "work" as she defines it, which means getting up every morning with a smile in her heart so she can spend the day doing that which makes her spirit sing.
Stephanie believes in learning to listen to your heart in order to figure out what your dreams are, and then opening yourself to the inspiration that will direct you there. She believes we all deserve the right to enjoy life, and for the ride to be as easy as we want it to be, and that we all should accept nothing less than making our dreams come true.
Stephanie lives in New England, and spends every day doing her best to fill it with people, observations and activities that uplift her soul, which include writing, tennis, dancing, friends, and her amazing family.
A life-long reader, she began crafting stories at age ten, but didn't realize it was her dream until she was an adult.
Once the light dawned, she immediately left behind "work" as the world defines it and went to "work" as she defines it, which means getting up every morning with a smile in her heart so she can spend the day doing that which makes her spirit sing.
Stephanie believes in learning to listen to your heart in order to figure out what your dreams are, and then opening yourself to the inspiration that will direct you there. She believes we all deserve the right to enjoy life, and for the ride to be as easy as we want it to be, and that we all should accept nothing less than making our dreams come true.
Stephanie lives in New England, and spends every day doing her best to fill it with people, observations and activities that uplift her soul, which include writing, tennis, dancing, friends, and her amazing family.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 193 reviews
May 1, 2019
Immortally Cursed by S A Bayne
Paranormal romantic comedy. Lots of witty dialogue and silly antics by most of the characters. I particularly liked Theresa the dragon and Satan’s shallowness.
Great fun with laugh out loud moments.
Originally published as Date Me, Baby, One More Time by Stephanie Rowe. Per the author, this new version has “been substantially revised and expanded”.
Paranormal romantic comedy. Lots of witty dialogue and silly antics by most of the characters. I particularly liked Theresa the dragon and Satan’s shallowness.
Great fun with laugh out loud moments.
Originally published as Date Me, Baby, One More Time by Stephanie Rowe. Per the author, this new version has “been substantially revised and expanded”.
August 21, 2013
As I loaded this book into my Goodreads.com account, setting it to “currently reading”, I couldn't help but notice a few of the reviews. They were slamming it as being a ridiculous book! With a title like “Date Me Baby, One More Time” I'm not sure what they were expecting? Perhaps they should be reading math books if they are looking for something more “serious” and not something from the paranormal/fantasy genre! LOL! ;-)
I *thoroughly* enjoyed this book! It made me giggle left and right! Quite a few times I literally had to slap my hand over my mouth to keep the laughter inside, since it was 2am!
Were the characters shallow? Well, a bit, but really, it's a romance... with dragons.... curses... naked men and a goblet of eternal youth masquerading as an espresso machine! I thought it was AWESOME! :-D Seriously, who thinks of these things??? Stephanie Rowe is a maniacally hysterical genius! :-D
If you are looking for some light-hearted reading after wading through two loooong, but good, epic fantasies – this is the book for you! :-D It requires very little thought and is just laugh out loud funny! Be careful though, your eyeballs might get stuck up in the top of your head from all the eye-rolling but that just makes things all the more fun!
Katie MacAllister, another of my favorite authors, is quoted as saying Date Me Baby, One More Time is “A hilarious underworld romp.” and that is exactly what it is! Fun, light-hearted, reading that will make you groan, and giggle, roll your eyes and snicker!
It's 100% fun!
Go... read it... I'm telling the truth! :-)
XXOO
~Hope
What Goodreads.com says:
Justine Bennett is cursing her life. She’s the Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth, she hasn’t left the house in ages, and it’s been over 200 years since she’s had sex. Oh, and the Goblet has shape shifted into an espresso machine. Not exactly the stuff grand destiny is made of...
Derek LaValle is worried. Due to a family curse, he’ll be dead in the space of a week unless he finds the Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth and beheads her. Which wouldn’t be a problem if she wasn’t so sexy, smart... and ready to behead him right back.
I *thoroughly* enjoyed this book! It made me giggle left and right! Quite a few times I literally had to slap my hand over my mouth to keep the laughter inside, since it was 2am!
Were the characters shallow? Well, a bit, but really, it's a romance... with dragons.... curses... naked men and a goblet of eternal youth masquerading as an espresso machine! I thought it was AWESOME! :-D Seriously, who thinks of these things??? Stephanie Rowe is a maniacally hysterical genius! :-D
If you are looking for some light-hearted reading after wading through two loooong, but good, epic fantasies – this is the book for you! :-D It requires very little thought and is just laugh out loud funny! Be careful though, your eyeballs might get stuck up in the top of your head from all the eye-rolling but that just makes things all the more fun!
Katie MacAllister, another of my favorite authors, is quoted as saying Date Me Baby, One More Time is “A hilarious underworld romp.” and that is exactly what it is! Fun, light-hearted, reading that will make you groan, and giggle, roll your eyes and snicker!
It's 100% fun!
Go... read it... I'm telling the truth! :-)
XXOO
~Hope
What Goodreads.com says:
Justine Bennett is cursing her life. She’s the Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth, she hasn’t left the house in ages, and it’s been over 200 years since she’s had sex. Oh, and the Goblet has shape shifted into an espresso machine. Not exactly the stuff grand destiny is made of...
Derek LaValle is worried. Due to a family curse, he’ll be dead in the space of a week unless he finds the Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth and beheads her. Which wouldn’t be a problem if she wasn’t so sexy, smart... and ready to behead him right back.
January 25, 2011
*Spoilers*
Ok the long and short of the story is that main character Justine Bennett is an immortal Guardian that has to protect a sacred Goblet with Fountain of Youth properties. She must protect it at all costs and even at the expense of her own personal life. Because if she doesn't she will be thrown into the hall of unspeakable horrors for not doing her job. Which she thinks she can handle with no problem at all as she never leaves the Goblet's side or her apartment whom she shares with her Goblet protecting successor and best friend Theresa. Whom just happens to be a dragon. But low and behold enter Derek LaValle, pretzel mogul/next cursed LaValle man to die, in the picture that is if he can behead the Guardian and save his brother and Justine now has to confront a real threat to not only the Goblet, but her heart, and very well her head if Derek doesn't cut it off.
Things I liked about the Book:
-Some of the milder humor. Like the scene when Derek was first trying to catch a glimpse of Justine at her apartment building. And her door man Xaiver kept suggesting he go do things with his powers and it was funny how Derek kept coming back knowing those suggestions weren't true. And even the scene where Theresea put a pretezel on Derek's chest as a sort of memorial wreath for him after Justine shot him after Xaiver had been tricked in suggesting Derek kill her with a sword meant to kill the Guardian.
Things I didn't like about the Book:
- Some of the over doing of humor, trying to be hip. I don't mind when there is humor in a book and a few hey girls and stuff like that. But this author over did the girlfriend this and that. And even some scenes that there really didn't need that much humor in it at all. But the author put it in there and it was a total buzz kill for the scene.
-The fact there was no real explanation as to what kind of immortal Justine really was. I mean yes the story said she was the Guardian of the Goblet. But it was never really established if she was a good or bad guardian at first. And if she was working for heaven or hell. I mean I'm sure the general accepted idea is that a Guardian is a source of good. But at times there can be Guardians for bad too.
-The weird fact that Theresea was transformed into a Dragon after drinking from the Goblet as she was Justine's successor. But what gets me is why Justine didn't transform into a Dragon as well when she was her mother's successor? That just didn't make sense to me.
-Again the weirdness of the fact that it was said that her mom wrote the rules for guarding the Goblet. And yet there was another part of the book it said something about the rules or the hand book hadn't been changed in umpteen years as if her mom hadn't even wrote up the rules.
-And most importantly the over doing of the "let me kill him, oh he/she is so my match as we are destined to kill each other." To me that was just over done too. I mean I get the book is supposed to be about Justine and Derek having to fight each other over the Goblet. But all the excessive kill each other puns and stuff was just not my cup of tea.
So as for recommending this book. I would say it would be good for those that might be into a much lighter side of the paranormal romance. But it may not come up to par with other paranormal/fantasy romance stories out there.
Ok the long and short of the story is that main character Justine Bennett is an immortal Guardian that has to protect a sacred Goblet with Fountain of Youth properties. She must protect it at all costs and even at the expense of her own personal life. Because if she doesn't she will be thrown into the hall of unspeakable horrors for not doing her job. Which she thinks she can handle with no problem at all as she never leaves the Goblet's side or her apartment whom she shares with her Goblet protecting successor and best friend Theresa. Whom just happens to be a dragon. But low and behold enter Derek LaValle, pretzel mogul/next cursed LaValle man to die, in the picture that is if he can behead the Guardian and save his brother and Justine now has to confront a real threat to not only the Goblet, but her heart, and very well her head if Derek doesn't cut it off.
Things I liked about the Book:
-Some of the milder humor. Like the scene when Derek was first trying to catch a glimpse of Justine at her apartment building. And her door man Xaiver kept suggesting he go do things with his powers and it was funny how Derek kept coming back knowing those suggestions weren't true. And even the scene where Theresea put a pretezel on Derek's chest as a sort of memorial wreath for him after Justine shot him after Xaiver had been tricked in suggesting Derek kill her with a sword meant to kill the Guardian.
Things I didn't like about the Book:
- Some of the over doing of humor, trying to be hip. I don't mind when there is humor in a book and a few hey girls and stuff like that. But this author over did the girlfriend this and that. And even some scenes that there really didn't need that much humor in it at all. But the author put it in there and it was a total buzz kill for the scene.
-The fact there was no real explanation as to what kind of immortal Justine really was. I mean yes the story said she was the Guardian of the Goblet. But it was never really established if she was a good or bad guardian at first. And if she was working for heaven or hell. I mean I'm sure the general accepted idea is that a Guardian is a source of good. But at times there can be Guardians for bad too.
-The weird fact that Theresea was transformed into a Dragon after drinking from the Goblet as she was Justine's successor. But what gets me is why Justine didn't transform into a Dragon as well when she was her mother's successor? That just didn't make sense to me.
-Again the weirdness of the fact that it was said that her mom wrote the rules for guarding the Goblet. And yet there was another part of the book it said something about the rules or the hand book hadn't been changed in umpteen years as if her mom hadn't even wrote up the rules.
-And most importantly the over doing of the "let me kill him, oh he/she is so my match as we are destined to kill each other." To me that was just over done too. I mean I get the book is supposed to be about Justine and Derek having to fight each other over the Goblet. But all the excessive kill each other puns and stuff was just not my cup of tea.
So as for recommending this book. I would say it would be good for those that might be into a much lighter side of the paranormal romance. But it may not come up to par with other paranormal/fantasy romance stories out there.
April 21, 2018
Wildly funny, with the humor of outlandishness that was pioneered by Monty Python and is applied here to the world of sweet paranormal romance, only to lose some of its oomph as outlandish slides into ridiculous toward the end. Still, it made me laugh all the way through.
This is the story of Derek and Justine, whose Happily Ever After depends on overcoming a Romantic Impediment: Derek's entire male line is cursed to die at the age of 31 years, 46 weeks, 4 days, 3 minutes, and five seconds, which gives Derek and his 10 minute younger twin brother a week to live unless Derek can steal the Goblet of Eternal Youth from Justine, its Guardian, a 232 year old celibate who of course enjoys eternal youth and is under Oath to kill anyone who even knows about the Goblet or die defending it, and she can only die by beheading. So Derek must kill Justine to save himself and his brother, and if Justine fails to kill Derek the Council will put her in the Chamber of Unspeakable Horrors for eternity. The Goblet, named Mona, is now an espresso machine that makes the best coffee around, but .
This simple tale is complicated by several other actors: Justine's 232 year old eternally young roommate Theresa, next in line to be Guardian, who was changed 200 years ago into a dragon and now has cybersex several times a day because of course she can't be seen in public; Justine's mother Iris, the former Guardian, who died 200 years ago defending the Goblet and is now an interfering ghost who will go to heaven or hell depending on what Justine does; Satan, ruler of hell, who has the hots for Iris and pursues her for the novel's secondary romance; Xavier, the mind-controlling doorman in Justine & Theresa's apartment building; Derek's twin Quincy who doesn't believe this crap; and many more.
The action never lets up, and the situations just get more and more bizarre, more so as tender feelings creep slowly into the picture between Derek and Justine and they try to figure a way out of certain death and eternal punishment (respectively). Satan is perhaps the funniest of all the characters, and then there's . I had a blast. You may too.
This is the story of Derek and Justine, whose Happily Ever After depends on overcoming a Romantic Impediment: Derek's entire male line is cursed to die at the age of 31 years, 46 weeks, 4 days, 3 minutes, and five seconds, which gives Derek and his 10 minute younger twin brother a week to live unless Derek can steal the Goblet of Eternal Youth from Justine, its Guardian, a 232 year old celibate who of course enjoys eternal youth and is under Oath to kill anyone who even knows about the Goblet or die defending it, and she can only die by beheading. So Derek must kill Justine to save himself and his brother, and if Justine fails to kill Derek the Council will put her in the Chamber of Unspeakable Horrors for eternity. The Goblet, named Mona, is now an espresso machine that makes the best coffee around, but .
This simple tale is complicated by several other actors: Justine's 232 year old eternally young roommate Theresa, next in line to be Guardian, who was changed 200 years ago into a dragon and now has cybersex several times a day because of course she can't be seen in public; Justine's mother Iris, the former Guardian, who died 200 years ago defending the Goblet and is now an interfering ghost who will go to heaven or hell depending on what Justine does; Satan, ruler of hell, who has the hots for Iris and pursues her for the novel's secondary romance; Xavier, the mind-controlling doorman in Justine & Theresa's apartment building; Derek's twin Quincy who doesn't believe this crap; and many more.
The action never lets up, and the situations just get more and more bizarre, more so as tender feelings creep slowly into the picture between Derek and Justine and they try to figure a way out of certain death and eternal punishment (respectively). Satan is perhaps the funniest of all the characters, and then there's . I had a blast. You may too.
April 27, 2019
Her life is one anyone would want for all eternity, but that’s exactly how long Justine Bennett has to be the Guardian for the Goblet of Eternal Youth. Being an immortal bad ass in the City that Never Sleeps should have been exciting but Justine has become quite bored, after she hasn’t gotten to behead anyone in centuries and the celibacy oath she took two hundred years ago is getting to her. But all that changes when Derek LaValle shows up at Justine’s door determined to do whatever it takes to put an end to the curse on the LaValle male line.
This delightful romance is loads of LOL fun that keeps readers in stitches with chuckle worthy dialogue and funny, unique characters that live in a refreshingly different world that readers can really enjoy. The characters are strong and really stand out as they entertain readers with their stunning wit and sarcasm. And readers can’t help but get a kick of delight as the very charming and tempting as hell Derek LaValle meets Justine and the chemistry electrifies the pages as they engage in a kind of tug of war game between killing each other or giving into their carnal desires despite all the rules.
This fast paced plot keeps readers well entertained and thoroughly absorbed with all the high-jinks, suspense and a treasure trove of unique elements and entertainment. Readers can’t help but enjoy Satan’s part in all of the splendid snark and excitement of this story, although his part may seem a bit over the top, it really fits well with the story and causes even more chuckles to the story. The world is imaginative, fresh, super fun and one that readers want to visit time and again while Justine and Derek’s relationship brings pop, sizzle, and enthusiasm to life.
This delightful romance is loads of LOL fun that keeps readers in stitches with chuckle worthy dialogue and funny, unique characters that live in a refreshingly different world that readers can really enjoy. The characters are strong and really stand out as they entertain readers with their stunning wit and sarcasm. And readers can’t help but get a kick of delight as the very charming and tempting as hell Derek LaValle meets Justine and the chemistry electrifies the pages as they engage in a kind of tug of war game between killing each other or giving into their carnal desires despite all the rules.
This fast paced plot keeps readers well entertained and thoroughly absorbed with all the high-jinks, suspense and a treasure trove of unique elements and entertainment. Readers can’t help but enjoy Satan’s part in all of the splendid snark and excitement of this story, although his part may seem a bit over the top, it really fits well with the story and causes even more chuckles to the story. The world is imaginative, fresh, super fun and one that readers want to visit time and again while Justine and Derek’s relationship brings pop, sizzle, and enthusiasm to life.
December 27, 2009
I think that it's hysterical that my favorite character in this book was Satan. He was a blond, Brad Pitt lookalike who was so in love with Justine's mom that he courted her for almost 200 years! His Pepe le Pew act was charming and awesome, and I've think he stole the show.
Justine and Derek had a great I love you but I'll have to kill you love affair. Mona the goblet of eternal youth/espresso machine was funny when she turned into the massage oil (ha ha) and the book was definitely a tongue-in-cheek story about an immortal guardian with a dragon roomie and a cursed boyfriend/man she must kill. And of course the cybersex dragon and Zeke are the set-up for Must Love Dragons, which I'll read next. A cute and fast read.
Justine and Derek had a great I love you but I'll have to kill you love affair. Mona the goblet of eternal youth/espresso machine was funny when she turned into the massage oil (ha ha) and the book was definitely a tongue-in-cheek story about an immortal guardian with a dragon roomie and a cursed boyfriend/man she must kill. And of course the cybersex dragon and Zeke are the set-up for Must Love Dragons, which I'll read next. A cute and fast read.
April 28, 2019
Immortally Cursed was my first novel by S.A. Bayne and I loved it. This story was entertaining, engrossing and unpredictable. I have to admit I really enjoyed this authors style of writing. The storyline was fun, fast-paced and well-crafted with multiple layers, designed to keep you hooked until the very end. There were twists and turns that had me at the edge of my seat wondering what's coming next and then on the next page, this story had me laughing out loud with some of the outrageous exploits and snarky banter.
The main characters Justine and Derek were two solid characters, supported by a range of unique, yet totally awesome extended characters who added balance and support to the couple and together they all made this novel the fantastic read that it was.
Immortally Cursed was a refreshing page-turner with a mix of comedy, suspense and slow burn romance that will definitely have you coming back for more. I loved this tale and would highly recommend it to all lovers of paranormal romance.
The main characters Justine and Derek were two solid characters, supported by a range of unique, yet totally awesome extended characters who added balance and support to the couple and together they all made this novel the fantastic read that it was.
Immortally Cursed was a refreshing page-turner with a mix of comedy, suspense and slow burn romance that will definitely have you coming back for more. I loved this tale and would highly recommend it to all lovers of paranormal romance.
March 31, 2009
The author tried too hard to be funny, and it ended up resulting in characters that bordered obnoxious. The character of Satan was just ridiculous and every time he was around I felt myself cringing.
There are some authors who do funny very well, ex) Kimberley Raye, Mary Janice Davidson, Sandra Hill etc.. If you are looking for a funny PNR or funny trad. romance, there are far better choices out there than this one. I wouldn't waste my time with any of the other books in this series.
There are some authors who do funny very well, ex) Kimberley Raye, Mary Janice Davidson, Sandra Hill etc.. If you are looking for a funny PNR or funny trad. romance, there are far better choices out there than this one. I wouldn't waste my time with any of the other books in this series.
April 30, 2019
Derek and Justine were amazing! I laughed for a good portion and cried too. Immortality sucks if you can't have your love beside you or your dragon. If you want a great emotionally charged book this is for you. You never know in this world what lives right next door to you! S.A. Bayne did a fantastic job on this book and can't wait for more from her.
April 29, 2019
Very humorous read. Satan is hilarious and the voice I read him in has stuck in my head. I loved the fact that Justine and Derek are both strong willed and steadfast in their beliefs but not so much so they can't work together. Story is well paced and the ending is not a cliffhanger.
August 3, 2019
In Stephanie Rowe's Date Me Baby, One More Time, the first time in the Immortally Sexy paranormal romance series, this debut will make you laugh out loud, snort and shake your head. For Justine Bennett, she's the chosen Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Life and other magical things in the mortal world. Her mother lives in Purgatory and her best friend and room mate Theresa is a living breathing dragon. Plus, she's been cursed for over 200 years as an immortal soul without having any saex. But when Derek LaValle comes knocking on her door and wants to kill her, he had fallen head over heels in love with her, except he's a cursed mortal. When they team up together, they light up the nights and discover who or what was behind the curse. Lo and behold, Justine had unearthed a shocking family secret her mother had kept hidden from her all her life, which had changed everything for her. And when they work together to stop the person who's behind the curse, they would do anything to be together and stop the culprit in his fiery red-hot tracks no matter what it would take.
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December 14, 2025
3.5 ⭐️ rounded up.
Fun, dumb, and a good time. Derek is great and carried the book.
Fun, dumb, and a good time. Derek is great and carried the book.
May 5, 2019
When I started this book I was still on the fence about Stephanie's humorous books. I liked Not Quite a Devil and The Demon You Trust, but I still wasn't quite sure if I was going to be able to get into a series of silliness.
LMAO!!! Who was I kidding! This book was hysterical! I've never read a book that embraces silliness, goofiness, downright bizarre behavior in such a complete way that the entire storyline depends on this humor! Usually when a book has snarky humor or even silly humor it's brought out as part of a character's personality. It becomes something you'd expect from one character, not the book as a whole.
Immortally Cursed is singularly the funniest, silliest, most ridiculous book I've ever read. And,oddly, this drove the storyline. The whole story was based on two protagonists needing to kill each other in order to survive. But, they like each other. So how are they supposed to do this? And the main protagonist, Justine, has more on her plate, needing to be the Guardian to the Goblet of Eternal Youth. And she had her second, Teresa, a dragon stuck in dragon form because she was named as successor to Justine. Being stuck in dragon form has its drawbacks. One big one, no sex. So, we have a man with a curse designed to kill him in a matter of days if he doesn't kill the Guardian first and get that Goblet. We have the Guardian who needs to kill the man before he kills her and steals the Goblet. And we have a sexually frustrated dragon who isn't allowed to set fire to anything, which makes for a very testy dragon. Oh, let's not forget the previous Guardian, Iris, Justine's mother and Satan's love interest, able to show up from Purgatory to visit. Or Satan himself, hell-bent to get into bed with Iris, spouting his many achievements to gain this obsession in the most backwards, ridiculous boasts of evil accomplishments as if they were everything Iris could possibly want. The dialog is enough to make your head spin! Exorcist anyone?
You put all of this together, give them all crazy situations that bring them together, rife with the knowledge that someone needs to die, yet no one able to deliver the killing blow. Couple that with dialog designed to keep you laughing throughout all the life-threatening scenarios. What could go wrong? Are you kidding? What didn't go wrong??? Particularly in this twisted comedy of errors and love!
If you can handle a book that makes you laugh page after page from sheer verbal silliness, from goofy off the wall behavior and from ridiculous circumstances, then you're going to love this book. Oddly, I found I did!
Oh, Very Well Done, Stephanie! Very Well Done indeed! I'm so shocked that I loved this book that I'm crowing about it from the rooftops! I'm usually a reader of serious, adventurous, good vs evil type UF and Fantasy books. So what magic did you weave that caused me to spend days laughing out loud at the most ridiculous dialog I've ever read? What spell did you spin that made me actually enjoy laughing like this? You're a literary witch, Stephanie (SA Bayne) Rowe! Kudos!
LMAO!!! Who was I kidding! This book was hysterical! I've never read a book that embraces silliness, goofiness, downright bizarre behavior in such a complete way that the entire storyline depends on this humor! Usually when a book has snarky humor or even silly humor it's brought out as part of a character's personality. It becomes something you'd expect from one character, not the book as a whole.
Immortally Cursed is singularly the funniest, silliest, most ridiculous book I've ever read. And,oddly, this drove the storyline. The whole story was based on two protagonists needing to kill each other in order to survive. But, they like each other. So how are they supposed to do this? And the main protagonist, Justine, has more on her plate, needing to be the Guardian to the Goblet of Eternal Youth. And she had her second, Teresa, a dragon stuck in dragon form because she was named as successor to Justine. Being stuck in dragon form has its drawbacks. One big one, no sex. So, we have a man with a curse designed to kill him in a matter of days if he doesn't kill the Guardian first and get that Goblet. We have the Guardian who needs to kill the man before he kills her and steals the Goblet. And we have a sexually frustrated dragon who isn't allowed to set fire to anything, which makes for a very testy dragon. Oh, let's not forget the previous Guardian, Iris, Justine's mother and Satan's love interest, able to show up from Purgatory to visit. Or Satan himself, hell-bent to get into bed with Iris, spouting his many achievements to gain this obsession in the most backwards, ridiculous boasts of evil accomplishments as if they were everything Iris could possibly want. The dialog is enough to make your head spin! Exorcist anyone?
You put all of this together, give them all crazy situations that bring them together, rife with the knowledge that someone needs to die, yet no one able to deliver the killing blow. Couple that with dialog designed to keep you laughing throughout all the life-threatening scenarios. What could go wrong? Are you kidding? What didn't go wrong??? Particularly in this twisted comedy of errors and love!
If you can handle a book that makes you laugh page after page from sheer verbal silliness, from goofy off the wall behavior and from ridiculous circumstances, then you're going to love this book. Oddly, I found I did!
Oh, Very Well Done, Stephanie! Very Well Done indeed! I'm so shocked that I loved this book that I'm crowing about it from the rooftops! I'm usually a reader of serious, adventurous, good vs evil type UF and Fantasy books. So what magic did you weave that caused me to spend days laughing out loud at the most ridiculous dialog I've ever read? What spell did you spin that made me actually enjoy laughing like this? You're a literary witch, Stephanie (SA Bayne) Rowe! Kudos!
April 27, 2019
I’ve read this author as Stephanie Rowe and loved every book. I was excited to see this new pen name and dived right into this book. I had completely forgotten just how much fun this author’s books were! Justine has to guard the Espresso Machine of Eternal Youth, Mona, but her job becomes complicated when Derek shows up to use Mona to break his family’s curse. What ensues is a LOL, wild ride with some great characters: Satan, who is head over heels in love with Justine’s mother; Theresa, a woman trapped as a dragon, Justine’s successor, and wants to burn everything up; Becca, Derek’s assistant at his company and the one who will get his company if the curse gets him; and Wendy, Derek’s brother Quincy’s assistant who want Quincy for her own. A well-written book, it kept me glued to the pages with fast-paced action, and a very engaging plot kept me turning the pages to see what was going to happen next. There were so many great surprises as I was reading the book, and I just love to be surprised when I read. If you love paranormal adventure books with romance, laughter, surprises, and suspense, you really do need to read this one! I really do highly recommend this book! I was provided the e-book which I voluntarily reviewed.
April 22, 2012
This was a funny almost in a watching a train wreck way. The plot was silly the characters caricatured and yet I enjoyed it.
Our h is Justine, an immortal Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth, her friend Theresa is named her successor, so gets to drink from said Goblet which turns her into a dragon who can't shift back, and they live in NY.
Our H is Derek La Valle, a Pretzel King (he invented no carb pretzels) and member of a Cursed family. At the age of 31 all male La Valle's die in horrible and mysterious circumstances.
Justine's mother was the previous Guardian and died protecting the Goblet, whose name is Mona, from Satan. Satan is a fabulous character and really made this book.
I'll be reading the next one in the series when I need a laugh.
Our h is Justine, an immortal Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth, her friend Theresa is named her successor, so gets to drink from said Goblet which turns her into a dragon who can't shift back, and they live in NY.
Our H is Derek La Valle, a Pretzel King (he invented no carb pretzels) and member of a Cursed family. At the age of 31 all male La Valle's die in horrible and mysterious circumstances.
Justine's mother was the previous Guardian and died protecting the Goblet, whose name is Mona, from Satan. Satan is a fabulous character and really made this book.
I'll be reading the next one in the series when I need a laugh.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 30, 2019
I have to say that when I started this book I didn’t know where we were going, but I really really liked it! I found this story about Derek’s curse really entertaining. I loved Justine! Her job is to protect Mona (goblet than can provide immortality and eternal youth), and she takes that job seriously. Together they race to break Derek’s curse. Along the way we meet so many characters, but to me Satan is the funniest. I laughed out loud at his antics, and how little respect he is given. 🔫💦 I also loved Theresa the dragon because she was bored, and just wanted to burn things. 🔥🦇 This was the first paranormal story I have read by this author. It will not be the last. It truly just lightened my mood, and I truly recommend it!
October 24, 2008
This is the first book in the Immortally Sexy series by Stephanie Rowe. The main character is Justine Bennett who is the current Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth, which is a magical object named Mona that can shape shift. She is sworn to protect Mona which means she is board out of her brains hiding in her secure pent house all the time. Then enter Derek LaValle - He’s hot and he’s cursed. (Talk about your Bad Boy!) It’s a family curse (not his fault - just bad gene’s) and the only way to end the curse it to behead the Guardian of the Goblet of Eternal Youth. You see where this is going right? Yeah. It’s a fun one!
February 12, 2016
Whoever follows me on here knows that for a nice story with supernatural beings I can deal with many things. But this was too much. It was so ridiculous and just simply terrible. There was not even that much sex scenes but the word sex was everywhere and it was just annoying. The idea to have Satan in the book was exciting, until I saw how ridiculed he was. Blasphemy haha. Also the horde of sexy hunk army.. Wtf. And thousand plot twists, I nearly got sick with all the twists and turns. The idea with the dragon was good and only this deserves the one star. The rest.. Zero.
April 28, 2019
Bit of a chaotic start, but this really was a delightful tale! Cheeky, irreverent, saucy and fun, a pleasure to read! I had my doubts when I first started reading, but I was quickly won over by the unusual characters. A self made mogul with a family curse that has killed every male for the last 200 years. He desperately needs to find the immortal guardian and The Goblet of Eternal Youth to break the curse. Add in a dragon sidekick, a mother in purgatory, and an eccentric twin brother and you have a list of a some of the characters that flesh out this charming story.
April 30, 2019
It is definitely a fun read. From start to finish, you get plenty of funny dialogue and crazy situations. There are plenty of surprises along the way.
I liked the craziness that surrounded their relationship. It was not easy for them to determine the right course of action. Their friends and family added complications. The ending was perfect for them and the other characters.
I am voluntarily reviewing a copy I received.
I liked the craziness that surrounded their relationship. It was not easy for them to determine the right course of action. Their friends and family added complications. The ending was perfect for them and the other characters.
I am voluntarily reviewing a copy I received.
April 30, 2019
I don’t think I have ever laughed so hard reading a book. There are so many great lines in here that had me laughing. Derek & Justine are a hot couple. S.A. Bayne has written an amazing book. Can’t wait for this series to continue. It had just enough heat to keep you wanting more but the true star of this book was the humor. I usually don’t highlight lines on my kindle, I highlighted so many line.
I received an ARC for my honest review.
I received an ARC for my honest review.
May 5, 2019
So Funny and Romantic
I found this not only hilariously comical but also romantic. Between Satan chasing after the Guardian's mother, a dragon with a predilection for cybersex, the Guardian must contend with a cursed male who has to kill her to get to her Ward. The antics of Satan, the friendship of Guardian and dragon who act more like sisters, and the cursed male whose family think is insane make for great entertainment.
I found this not only hilariously comical but also romantic. Between Satan chasing after the Guardian's mother, a dragon with a predilection for cybersex, the Guardian must contend with a cursed male who has to kill her to get to her Ward. The antics of Satan, the friendship of Guardian and dragon who act more like sisters, and the cursed male whose family think is insane make for great entertainment.
October 10, 2009
Loved this book. It is exactly what it says it is on the front cover-- 'a hilarious underworld romp'. I enjoyed it so much that I actually went to Amazon and ordered the second book as well as preordered the third.
We have Satan, Satan Jr, an 11 foot dragon, a guy with a curse on him, and the guardian of the goblet all thrown together in a great adventure!
We have Satan, Satan Jr, an 11 foot dragon, a guy with a curse on him, and the guardian of the goblet all thrown together in a great adventure!
April 13, 2015
This was an amusing read, with lots of funny dialogue, so it perfectly suited my mood. My complaint is that the logic was off about half way through, so the supposed tension the main couple was feeling fell completely flat for me. But I still wanted to know how it would end, so that says something for the story.
February 24, 2018
DNF
Another one meets the pre-move, donation pile. I got through the first couple chapters, but I couldn't have cared any less about the main character's curse or any of the others. It's a pass from me. I have too many other things that I'm looking forward to reading to push through something I'm not remotely enjoying.
Another one meets the pre-move, donation pile. I got through the first couple chapters, but I couldn't have cared any less about the main character's curse or any of the others. It's a pass from me. I have too many other things that I'm looking forward to reading to push through something I'm not remotely enjoying.
April 30, 2019
Well written story full of humour, suspence and steam
This was such an entertaining read, full of humour, chemistry, surprises and suspense. The story was fast paced and totally sucked me in with the banter and twists. So many characters to love, so much wit to giggle, or outright lol to, it really was a fun read. I'm looking forward to more books in this series. Well done, Ms. Bayne!
This was such an entertaining read, full of humour, chemistry, surprises and suspense. The story was fast paced and totally sucked me in with the banter and twists. So many characters to love, so much wit to giggle, or outright lol to, it really was a fun read. I'm looking forward to more books in this series. Well done, Ms. Bayne!
July 15, 2010
I never made it past page 15 in this one, it was bland and boring and Derek the main character irritated me. This one just wasn't for me.
September 18, 2011
Very funny and a HEA Good stuff.
April 29, 2019
This is a must read! From the first page to the last you are taken on a magical journey! Love, lust, betrayal, redemption, it has it all! You will not regret this read! Stephanie has done it again!
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