I Am WE: My Life with Multiple Personalities

by Christine Pattillo

Many people have secrets they are fearful to share with those who love them. Christine Pattillo was one of those people—except instead of just one secret, she had many.



As long as Christine could remember, she lived with Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) or Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). At times she shared her life with up to six alternate personalities, yet she masqueraded as an active and happy high school student, a successful career woman, and a wife of fifteen years. But she kept her secret hidden from everyone around her, including her own husband. It wasn’t until the age of forty-one and after ten years of counseling that she finally managed to utter the seven most difficult words of her “There is more than one of me.”



Coming out about MPD was terrifying. Was her husband going to leave her? How was she going to tell her mother, siblings, and friends? How would people judge her? And how would she and the alters live day to day out in the open, each carving out their own quality time? How would they all integrate in society? What happens when one of the alters wants to have a baby of her own? And a suicidal one wants to destroy them all?



In this fascinating memoir, Christine shares her incredible journey of life with MPD. Readers come to know all of the alters (Hope, SHE, Rim, Tristan, Q, Chrissy, and Cyndi) as the unique and extraordinary individuals they are. We also hear from Christine’s husband, family, friends, and therapist, who relate firsthand the joys and challenges of living with MPD.



I Am WE dispels many common, often misguided conceptions about MPD. While theories about the condition abound, none are more qualified to discuss it than those living it. Join Christine and her family as they share their highs and lows, triumphs and losses, and above all the love they have for one other.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Psychology, Mental Health, Biography

374 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 28, 2014

Reviews

[Angela Warner · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fantastic first-persons' account of multiplicity. I'm extremely dubious about the idea of integration, but this narrative shows that sometimes, it's necessary and beneficial for the sake of the whole collective in certain circumstances (only one person was integrated). They all live cohesively together with the author's husband and watching their videos on YouTube has been a delight.

[Ruby · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read for school; the way she functions and lives her life is very hard to grasp but it’s very interesting to read her story

[Joy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an amazing account of Christine's journey so far. Mostly written by Christine and her alter personalities, it includes comments by some of the closest people around them, including her husband, whose creativity, flexibility and sense of adventure have contributed immensely to the group's adjustment. The alters demand their own individual experiences, and there is a distinct feeling that Christine would feel robbed if her alter personalities were integrated. One of the personalities, named Q, is even a contributing member of society with her jewelry-making business. Christine has a substitute for integration, now that most of her personalities communicate with each other and can see what is going on. In fact, the biggest problem at time of writing seems to be that each of the personalities wants more than equal time, doing the things they prefer. Therapy continues.

[Marsha Fouts]

This book is interesting. It is written by the altars of one woman and describes the daily life of being and living with a person with multiple personality disorder. Day to day life can be very confusing and challenging with this condition but can be managed. The book gives some new insight into the disorder and seems to be an honest account of the gang's experience.

[Ellen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Enjoyable, easy, first-person account regarding the life of one with MPD/DID. Doesn’t go into detail of abuse that led to DID, simply what life is like and the impact of therapy.

[Charlotte · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the best book I have read so far on MPD or DID. Most of the book is told from the view of the main personality with quite a bit of input from the alters. However, we also hear from the therapist, the husband, the mother, the brother, and other relatives and friends. The time frame spans more than 18 years so the reader is informed about the changes that occurred during that time.
The drawings made by various resident personalities add to the reader's understanding. The author is an intelligent, talented writer with a great sense of humor along with compassion for others. She lists a few books which she recommends for further reading on DID and other mental health issues at the end of this book.
I found only a few minor errors that could have been corrected by the editor of the book; they did not detract from the value of the book.

[Kailiyah Knight · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cita, Q, Tristan, Chrissy, Cyndi, SHE, Rim, Christopher, Mariana, and everyone else who helped with this story,
I thank you. I found your book while learning about dissociative identity disorder in my AP Psychology class. Your work is powerful, strong, vulnerable, painful, and beautiful; you have reached and helped so many people. You have taught me so much, and I commend your honesty, even when it must've been exceedingly difficult. I wish you all the best.

[Susan Davies · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting book

I enjoyed reading Christines book and meeting all of her personalities. What a very hard journey they are on. Her youngest alter is 2 years old and she has 1 male alter, and others. She calls them all "the gang
"This is sometimes what happens when a child goes through trauma. The mind splits and alternate personalities are made to cope with abuse. It is a survival technique which I am in awe of.
A very inspiring and amazing story of survival and thriving!

[Alana Bookapillar · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve always had a fascination with MPD/DID. So I’ve read a lot of books on the subject as well as books written by therapists, or those who have the disorder. This book is unique, as each of the alters participates in the actual writing of the book. The story is written in such a way that it is easy to switch your own mindset to flow along with the alter’s perspective on their world and what happens when they switch. It is also unique to have portions written by family members and friends. There are pictures included, which were drawn by different alters in therapy, as well as photos of Christine growing up and with Christopher, her husband of many years. This book is a triumph for Cita and her alters, and I highly recommend it to gain insight into how coping and healing is not only possible, but actually enjoying life as a cohesive unit can be achieved.

[Mel Lynn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely incredible read. Emotionally difficult at times. Told with perspectives of not just alters but people in Christine's life which gives a very well rounded perspective. I love that alters were able to write how they wanted with little editing. Notes from the therapist were included. Very deep dive into the disorder, this woman's journey, and interesting reflections for therapeutic methods. Includes illustrations and pictures that I thought really heightened the experience of the novel.

[Issadora · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome system and relating about DID to those who want to learn more

This story is more about living with and lives of alters, core, marriage, therapy and supporting ones not so much of the horowing details that brought about splitting. The drawings and personalities are really engaging in there roles, grief, joy etc

It’s definitely a favorite book on DID IVE READ

[Brenda Pedro · Rating 5 out of 5]

excellent book

An amazing front row seat to the inner workings of a person living with MPD.
I wish I had read this book years ago when my grandmother was alive and living with MPD, I wouldn't have been so afraid of her. The alters truly are real personalities living their best life with Cita. Thank you for sharing your remarkable life.

[Jenessa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very interesting read. I’ve always been intrigued by DID. I’ll be honest, I used to believe that this wasn’t a real disorder. After reading this I am no longer ignorant. Christine is such a strong lady, as well as her alters.

Must read!

[Quinn · Rating 4 out of 5]

An intimate look at what life is like with DID.

[Kattie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is the closest memoir of DID that matches my experience with it.

[Charlynn Savage · Rating 5 out of 5]

absolutely loved this book.... everyone's journey is different and their life is different from the way MPD is usually handled

[Josh Rothbauer · Rating 5 out of 5]

DID is so incomprehensible to me. This book did a good job explaining life with it to a layman

[Jennifer England · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was suggested to me by one of my customers. I work at a bank. In reading this my eyes have been opened that some of my family may have MPD. They have been diagnosed as bipolar but Christine's personalities make more sense to understanding their situation. Thank you for sharing your story. God bless your husband for having unconditional love for you. And God bless Mariana for not giving up. Life for all of them would have turned out differently without your love.

[Katie Luman · Rating 4 out of 5]

This may not be everyone's cup of tea and it posed all sorts of questions for me but the therapist in me was fascinated by Christine's story.

[Barbara · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good book but just did not appreciate the way it was written like the author would have liked. It also seemed to drag on at times.

[Carielyn Mills · Rating 4 out of 5]

a complete mindfuck. i couldn't put it down.