The Old Colts

by Glendon Swarthout

When Glendon Swarthout's barber introduces him to a retired journalist in the local OK Tonsorial Corral, the one, the only Walter Winchell, he is stunned to learn that the old-timer is in possession of a remarkable document: the true story of Bat Masterson's final years, written in the legendary shootist's own hand. Passed on from Damon Runyon in 1945, the four holograph pages, if genuine, are pure dynamite. For here we learn how Masterson meets up with the one, the only Wyatt Earp in New York City in 1916 and these two aging gunslingers, a couple of old Colts, turn their backs on their reputations and start raising hell in the late afternoon of their lives.
Wine, women, and song and -- if you can believe it -- a life of crime by two of the most respected heroes of the Old West. Truth or fiction, the author leaves the reader to decide in this masterfully handled comic Western.

Reviews --

"Swarthout easily weaves the facts about Earp's and Masterson's actual careers into his fiction, and his engaging yarn spins along at the brisk pace of a well-tuned Model T. The slang reads right, the laughs are real, and the pay-off is deserved. The Old Colts is a knee-slapper, a jaw-dropper and a comic delight."
the Los Angeles Times, anonymous reviewer

"It's fast and funny. One admires not only Swarthout's ability to handle the language of the period, but also his inventiveness with scene and incident.... It's a marvel of a tall tale."
Rex Burns, the Denver Post

""...the book ends with an action-packed episode that will make every Western buff cheer."
Phil Thomas, Associated Press Books Editor

"Catchy dialogue and a flavorful portrayal of the Old West mindset are the hallmarks of this novel, which will be enjoyed by both genre buffs and general readers."
Booklist, of the American Library Association

"This is a fast-paced, wry story, heavy with atmospheric flavor and packed with a cameo cast that ranges from George M. Cohan to Teddy Roosevelt. A dandy entertainment."
Charles Michaud, the Library Journal

"If ever a book were entitled to the description 'ripsnorter,' this is it....Glendon Swarthout has a filmmaker's eye and sense of pace, a poet's love of language...Swarthout takes Wyatt Earp and us for quite a ride. One hopes they make a movie out of this latest ragtag brawler of a book. Lee Marvin and George Kennedy could do it. So who cares if The Old Colts isn't exactly history? We can always wish it were."
William Ruehlmann, the Virginian-Pilot

"In a yarn highly reminiscent of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Glendon Swarthout has put together an extremely entertaining tale of the latter days of Bat Masterson and Wyatt Earp...Swarthout has a most realistic touch and the two characters come winningly to life from his pages...Entertaining reading for a hot summer night, it certainly is. And with all, a look at the Old West far more realistic and candid than has appeared in a long time."
Bruce Lawrason, the Indianopolis Star

"The Old Colts is a wildly funny story of a reunion between the famous gunfighters, when they were in their sixties, and their last great adventure together.,..Swarthout has resurrected with affection and humor a pair of American legends who deserve never to be forgotten."
James M. Tarbox, St. Paul, Minnesota Morning Pioneer Press Dispatch

"A genuinely humorous novel that is frequently exciting due to its inventive use of language. Most of all it is great fun. Let me add that there is a passage in which Wyatt and Bat go out on a date with a couple of Dodge City girls. The scene back at the hotel is, in my opinion, a minor classic. Warning: reading it may be hazardous to your ability to keep a straight face for hours afterward." Dennis Beck, McAllen, Texas Monitor

Genres: Westerns

239 pages, Paperback

First published May 20, 1985

About the author

Glendon Fred Swarthout was an American writer. Some of his best known novels were made into films of the same title, Where the Boys Are, The Shootist and They Came To Cordura.

Also wrote under Glendon Fred Swarthout. Twice nominated for the Pulitzer Prize in Fiction.

See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glendon_...

Reviews

[Miles Swarthout · Rating 5 out of 5]

Some fine day some smart producer in Hollywood is going to find The Old Colts again and be able to cast it properly to turn into a dandy of a comic Western about two of the most fabled gunmen in the Old West. Bat Masterson and Wyatt Earp outlived almost all of their gunfighting and outlaw peers, living well into the 20th Century, Bat even as a sportswriter in NYC, and both of them telling lies to prying journalists right until their very ends. Robert Halmi, Sr., the Tycoon of the TV-Movie, optioned this tale twice, as did one other TV-Movie producing team, but neither could ever cast the right combination of two older movie stars with credible backgrounds in earlier Western films. Some day, some way, we'll get The Old Colts made as a film, since I've now retitled it Mr. Masterson and Mr. Earp to make it more recognizable to moviegoers. This is too expensive a story to ever make as a TV-Movie, though, as it has to be a lower mid-range period feature.

More information about the writing Swarthouts and descriptions of all their adult novels and YA novellas, plus movie trailers of the 9 films made from their stories as well as screenplays (originals and adaptations), are posted on their literary website -- www.glendonswarthout.com

Here are a few more fine Book Reviews which didn't get posted in the other book description here --

"Is there a movie here? Who else but Kirk Douglas and Burt Lancaster? They would be just about perfect, those two, as Bat and Wyatt in this romp through history as it might have happened. Or should have happened."
Don Freeman San Diego Union

"Go beyond any question of authenticity and there remains a barn-burner of a story written by a fast and exciting scribbler...You won't want to miss it. You'll ride through this wooly tale with no saddle sores, it's fast-paced and smooth. Anyone who can smell the dusty trails and doesn't mind imbibing a little hair-of-the-dog will be sorry when there's no more of it to read."
Wayne M. Anderson Fort Worth Star Telegram

"Among the many good things going for this novel, Swarthout knows the Old West as well as any writer around. He has a certain reverence, even, for the old colts like Wyatt and Bat. He has a flair for the comic, and he has the wit and gift to bring off a spoof like this in such a way that the old colts, far from being tarnished in the telling, gain a humanness that is missing in their biographies. The Old Colts is a wonderful romp."
Dale L. Walker, the El Paso Times

"This is a sprightly, hilarious romp through Western history crafted by a master....It provides a much-needed glimpse of how Kansas might actually have been midway through the second decade of this century. Most (and best) of all, it's fun, from the first page to the last--lean, fast-moving, insightful and authentically written pure entertainment."
Gene Smith Topeka, Kansas Capital-Journal

"Wyatt and Bat surely will join the brotherhood of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid as well as their latter-day counterparts, "the Gang Who Couldn't Shoot Straight," in this riotous gallop over the wild American past."
Paul C. Day Tulsa, Oklahoma Tribune

"It's an amusing tale that Swarthout handles with just enough tongue-in-cheek to make it entertaining." Chicago Tribune

"Swarthout has done a good job of illustrating the rapid changes the country went through from the late 1800's, when Bat, Wyatt, and the six-shooters were the law, to the modern automobile-filled cities of the early 1900's, where the pair had to apply for permits just to carry their famous 'six-shooters'...The dialogue between the two tight-lipped cowboys is especially good, their few short words containing the hopes, fears, regrets and love shared between two men whose business it had been--as gamblers and lawmen--to conceal emotion....Swarthout has done an excellent job of portraying two genuine American folk heroes, and the difficulties they face once history and progress leave them behind."
Richard Turner Springfield, Missouri News-Leader

"A MARVELOUS tongue-in-cheek adventure that reunites two legends of the Wild West, Bat Masterson and Wyatt Earp, in the bustling New York of the early 1900's...Masterson, who in fact moved to New York City and became a respected sports columnist, and Earp, who retired to California, are brought charmingly to life in this outrageous tale. It is obviously untrue, but Swarthout's style makes you imagine it just MIGHT have happened."
Jim Elrick Aberdeen, Scotland Evening Express

"In any other hands but those of this accomplished writer, it would have become farce, but not with Mr. Swarthout in charge. It's a book to enjoy, completely at variance with his more serious preceding novels. If you like good writing--read. If you like Westerns--read. If you like both--then you're in for a treat.
I guarantee." Jewish Gazette, British Isles

[Jennie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’m a little disappointed. I usually love Glendon Swarthout, but this book—which could have been a great story about two aging gunfighters (Bat Masterson and Wyatt Earp)—became a very weird depiction of them creating a stage act. Swarthout swears it’s all true, but then claims the written proof was eaten by his cat. I wish I could believe it.

[Doug · Rating 2 out of 5]

Two-and-a-half stars.

Meh. I truly enjoyed Swarthout's "The Shootist," but this one was just too silly/campy for me. I'm at least partially to blame for not enjoying it very much, though. My mind's eye refuses to see anyone other than Hugh O'Brian and Gene Barry in the roles of Wyatt Earp and Bat Masterson. So the two clowns I was reading about just didn't cut it.

It was at least slightly amusing to hear Earp and Masterson mention J.B. Books' demise, though.

[Barry · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bat Masterson and Wyatt Earp back together many years after the Wooly Western days of Dodge City. Bat and Wyatt reconnect in New York City in 1916 and then the fun ensues.

[Deb · Rating 1 out of 5]

I had high hopes for this book. I just can't wrap my mind around Bat and Wyatt saying and doing such silliness.