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Five-Minute Relationship Repair: Quickly Heal Upsets, Deepen Intimacy, and Use Differences to Strengthen Love
The Tool Kit No Relationship Should Be Without
Long-term happiness in love depends on a couple’s ability to repair the inevitable rifts and differences, large and small, that occur in any relationship. Neuroscience suggests that relationship upsets are best mended quickly, or they accumulate in long-term memory, increase reactive communication, and become harder to repair successfully. And good repair takes five minutes or less! This book offers practical tools and suggested scripts for resolving problems and having your needs met. Following its guidance, you can turn difficulties into opportunities to foster love, trust, and thriving intimacy.
Long-term happiness in love depends on a couple’s ability to repair the inevitable rifts and differences, large and small, that occur in any relationship. Neuroscience suggests that relationship upsets are best mended quickly, or they accumulate in long-term memory, increase reactive communication, and become harder to repair successfully. And good repair takes five minutes or less! This book offers practical tools and suggested scripts for resolving problems and having your needs met. Following its guidance, you can turn difficulties into opportunities to foster love, trust, and thriving intimacy.
- GenresRelationshipsPsychology
296 pages, Paperback
First published January 20, 2015
52 people are currently reading
283 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
March 19, 2016
Helped see why my girlfriend and I each either caused fights or closed off, opened up communication and I still use the break to let us calm down, decent read, but it's a lot to read, although it helps you grasp the concept(s).
April 17, 2023
"Five-Minute Relationship Repair" by Susan Campbell and John Grey
Reviewed on 17 April 2023
This book was a relatively quick and basic read. It's great for beginners to self-help books. With me reading hundred of similar books in the last two decades, nothing exceptional stood out for me. Still a good books to read for those who can't seem to get what they need from their partners as it encourages you to refrain from reacting quickly and changing your perspective.
Here are a couple things I highlighted, though.
Page 104: "All children need help expressing their feelings."
Page 105: "All children need help understanding the feelings of others."
"All children need guidance and encouragement."
Reviewed on 17 April 2023
This book was a relatively quick and basic read. It's great for beginners to self-help books. With me reading hundred of similar books in the last two decades, nothing exceptional stood out for me. Still a good books to read for those who can't seem to get what they need from their partners as it encourages you to refrain from reacting quickly and changing your perspective.
Here are a couple things I highlighted, though.
Page 104: "All children need help expressing their feelings."
Page 105: "All children need help understanding the feelings of others."
"All children need guidance and encouragement."
February 15, 2025
Some clients of mine wanted to go through this book together, so that’s why I read it. This is an older book from 2015, and the 5 minute part is a “repair statement”, but of course there’s a lot more to it than that. This isn’t my favorite basic relationship book but it does cover all the bases — explains the brain and the fight or flight instinct; talks about co-regulation; identifies core needs & fears; helps you communicate with vulnerability; and teaches repair. This book is especially good for couples who fight but maybe not as good for couples who have just drifted apart. There are probably a couple others I’d recommend before this one, but lots of good info here!
February 23, 2023
Theoretically a good book, but very repetitive and based not on made-up examples. The wording of their scripts is impossible to utter with a straight face. Not a total waste of time, but definitely not the solution they claim.
May 14, 2019
Endorsements:
“Shows us how to approach differences with openhearted listening and vulnerable truth telling...If you read and work with the practices offered here, you have everything you need to create a secure, lasting bond with your partner.”
— Jack Canfield, author of The Success Principles: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be
“Using the case of a typical couple in trouble as their starting point, John Grey and Susan Campbell walk you through a sequential set of techniques based on neuroscience and attachment theory....Their work here is inventive, inspiring, and well worth the read.”
— Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, author of Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship
“Drs. Campbell and Grey have created a terrific guide for therapists as well as for couples working on their own. So many couples suffer unnecessarily with conflict, and here is an excellent resource for going straight to the vulnerable truth, rather than staying in old reactive patterns. I am recommending it to the couples in my counseling practice.”
— Linda Bloom, LCSW, coauthor of 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married: Simple Lessons to Make Love Last
“Shows us how to approach differences with openhearted listening and vulnerable truth telling...If you read and work with the practices offered here, you have everything you need to create a secure, lasting bond with your partner.”
— Jack Canfield, author of The Success Principles: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be
“Using the case of a typical couple in trouble as their starting point, John Grey and Susan Campbell walk you through a sequential set of techniques based on neuroscience and attachment theory....Their work here is inventive, inspiring, and well worth the read.”
— Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, author of Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship
“Drs. Campbell and Grey have created a terrific guide for therapists as well as for couples working on their own. So many couples suffer unnecessarily with conflict, and here is an excellent resource for going straight to the vulnerable truth, rather than staying in old reactive patterns. I am recommending it to the couples in my counseling practice.”
— Linda Bloom, LCSW, coauthor of 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married: Simple Lessons to Make Love Last
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews