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Haynes Owners' Workshop Manual
Alien Invasion: Owners' Resistance Manual
With many of the world's top scientists now predicting that the Earth will be invaded by aliens within the next few decades, the battle to defend our planet from fiendish extra-terrestrials is no longer the realm of science fiction. UFO sightings and abduction cases continue to increase, with millions around the world now reporting that they have been held by aliens - everything is pointing to a day when we will be invaded by forces from beyond our Solar System.
But don't panic - the Alien Invasion Manual has been designed to provide you with the very latest scientific insight and intelligence available on aliens and their plans to take over our gleaming blue planet. In true Haynes style, it aims to demonstrate how with the right knowledge, training and a substantial reel of aluminium foil, the concerned citizen can really hit ET where it hurts. You can protect your home and family from mind-bending abductions, you can ensure that you remain free of any sinister implants and you can determine which shape-shifting lizards are working to take over society.
Accompanied by illustrations, maps, diagrams and step-by-step instructions, this resistance manual will be essential reading for those interested in protecting the planet from alien invaders:
* Discover the truth about aliens and how they have already infiltrated Earth.
* Learn the real story behind the Roswell crash, Area 51 and terrifying facts about alien abductions.
* Read about the alien species that threaten us - from the DNA-hungry Greys to the shape shifting Draconian reptiles.
* Become an Extra-terrestrial Prepper - trained and ready to defend our planet.
* Create an abduction 'safe room' in your home and learn how to fight alien invaders.
* A comprehensive analysis of alien invasion strategies and how humanity can defeat them.
* A complete blueprint to the defending of our Solar System.
* Plus hundreds of new uses for aluminium foil.
But don't panic - the Alien Invasion Manual has been designed to provide you with the very latest scientific insight and intelligence available on aliens and their plans to take over our gleaming blue planet. In true Haynes style, it aims to demonstrate how with the right knowledge, training and a substantial reel of aluminium foil, the concerned citizen can really hit ET where it hurts. You can protect your home and family from mind-bending abductions, you can ensure that you remain free of any sinister implants and you can determine which shape-shifting lizards are working to take over society.
Accompanied by illustrations, maps, diagrams and step-by-step instructions, this resistance manual will be essential reading for those interested in protecting the planet from alien invaders:
* Discover the truth about aliens and how they have already infiltrated Earth.
* Learn the real story behind the Roswell crash, Area 51 and terrifying facts about alien abductions.
* Read about the alien species that threaten us - from the DNA-hungry Greys to the shape shifting Draconian reptiles.
* Become an Extra-terrestrial Prepper - trained and ready to defend our planet.
* Create an abduction 'safe room' in your home and learn how to fight alien invaders.
* A comprehensive analysis of alien invasion strategies and how humanity can defeat them.
* A complete blueprint to the defending of our Solar System.
* Plus hundreds of new uses for aluminium foil.
128 pages, Hardcover
First published October 1, 2014
2 people are currently reading
173 people want to read
About the author
Sean T. Page
32 books23 followersI am a dedicated zombie survivalist and blogger, The Official Zombie Handbook (UK) was my first published work in 2010.
Since then, I have published War against the Walking Dead and the novel Meta-horde. All my work is through Severed Press.
A bit about me, I have trekked across Patagonia, the Alps and the Sahara, learning much from the locals on survival and dealing with ghouls. I have been thrown out of various government offices for pursuing my views with such vigour and am one step away from having a restraining order to keep me away from my local Member of Parliament.
95% of the population probably think I should be sectioned. The remaining 5% are who I rely on to spread the word – these are the folks who will survive a zombie apocalypse and help to rebuild our country in the aftermath.
Since then, I have published War against the Walking Dead and the novel Meta-horde. All my work is through Severed Press.
A bit about me, I have trekked across Patagonia, the Alps and the Sahara, learning much from the locals on survival and dealing with ghouls. I have been thrown out of various government offices for pursuing my views with such vigour and am one step away from having a restraining order to keep me away from my local Member of Parliament.
95% of the population probably think I should be sectioned. The remaining 5% are who I rely on to spread the word – these are the folks who will survive a zombie apocalypse and help to rebuild our country in the aftermath.
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Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews
July 9, 2021
Tips on how to survive and protect yourself during an alien invasion.
Maps, diagrams and instructions.
Learn about the Roswell crash and Area 51.
Learn about different types of aliens.
Draconian reptiles, specifying lizards, implants and more.
Fun book
Good illustrations.
Maps, diagrams and instructions.
Learn about the Roswell crash and Area 51.
Learn about different types of aliens.
Draconian reptiles, specifying lizards, implants and more.
Fun book
Good illustrations.
December 3, 2014
This is a complete manual in original "Haynes style" offering the everyday person like you and me information on how to save ourselves from an Alien invasion. Giving us detailed knowledge and training of how to protect yourself and your family when and if we are invaded.
This is a complete manual in original "Haynes style" offering the everyday person like you and me information on how to save ourselves from an Alien invasion. Giving us detailed knowledge and training of how to protect yourself and your family when and if we are invaded.
First I have to say...wow...what gorgeous excellent quality A4, hardbacked, glossy paged books these are, you really feel your getting value for money and its a brilliant thoroughly researched tongue in cheek coffee table book. Im so proud to have these lying on my coffee table; as friends and family just cant help picking them up and have a quick thumb through; its a great conversation starter with such a fascinating subject that everyone is interested in on some level....how can you not be!
When you first look inside you are faced with a "Don't Panic" page! Sean explains its published by the Ministry of Alien Defense in London who have access to the US air UFO files, abduction cases, evidence from UFO crash sites and alleged top secret plans about the newly created Earth Defense force.
So you know you will be getting a wonderfully blended mix of facts and fiction with light hearted assumptions and its up to you what you want to agree with, feel free not to believe, but don't come running to me when the probing starts.
Inside more detailed defense strategies from Sean's own knowledge and military background. Plus fascinating details about alien abduction written in a fun not tedious stuffy way. I cannot stress enough how well written Alien invasion is with so much time, effort and detail put into it; whether you believe it will happen or not its an absolutely fascinatingly fun book to read.
There are some gorgeous colorful, diagrams and images throughout the book which are drawn by brilliant illustrator Ian Moores; and will most certainly make you smile. I loved the extra details of scorch marks on the pages from...ray guns and burn holes, oily smudges and laser beams and what I really love are the authors hand written comments at some of the information; which are often funny and adds a really fun connection between author and reader.
Plus like the Zombie Survival manual you also get The Alien Invasion Exam to pass at the end of the book; which will make you laugh so much! You can then cutout and keep your own Basic and Advanced certificates included at the back of the book; A really nice touch especially for the kids to have and keep up on their wall or even the bigger kids out there...cough...cough..who...me...noo...!
Summary
Jam packed with information, diagrams, facts and figures about the little green...or grey men..bugs, Draconians...and all things ET. Plus how too sections on prepping and combat with different alien species and still maintaining a deadpan face its just a brilliant super-duper read!
I am buzzing about both the Zombie survival book from Sean and this; as if your a complete geek like me and love anything to do with aliens, apocalypse and zombies, get both of these Haynes manuals; they will make a gorgeous pressie for someone fascinated with the unknown or with learning about survival techniques.
I think there will be some people who will believe every word, but on a more serious note I would like to add to any friendly alien out there; lets have coffee round yours and talk ray guns and suntans! But to any Alien Overlord out there wanting to rule the world; then GGR and everyone who has this book looks forward to kicking your ET butt...SIR.
*I received this book from the author for an honest review. checkout my full photoloaded review with animation here http://www.gadgetgirlreviews.com/2014...
This is a complete manual in original "Haynes style" offering the everyday person like you and me information on how to save ourselves from an Alien invasion. Giving us detailed knowledge and training of how to protect yourself and your family when and if we are invaded.
First I have to say...wow...what gorgeous excellent quality A4, hardbacked, glossy paged books these are, you really feel your getting value for money and its a brilliant thoroughly researched tongue in cheek coffee table book. Im so proud to have these lying on my coffee table; as friends and family just cant help picking them up and have a quick thumb through; its a great conversation starter with such a fascinating subject that everyone is interested in on some level....how can you not be!
When you first look inside you are faced with a "Don't Panic" page! Sean explains its published by the Ministry of Alien Defense in London who have access to the US air UFO files, abduction cases, evidence from UFO crash sites and alleged top secret plans about the newly created Earth Defense force.
So you know you will be getting a wonderfully blended mix of facts and fiction with light hearted assumptions and its up to you what you want to agree with, feel free not to believe, but don't come running to me when the probing starts.
Inside more detailed defense strategies from Sean's own knowledge and military background. Plus fascinating details about alien abduction written in a fun not tedious stuffy way. I cannot stress enough how well written Alien invasion is with so much time, effort and detail put into it; whether you believe it will happen or not its an absolutely fascinatingly fun book to read.
There are some gorgeous colorful, diagrams and images throughout the book which are drawn by brilliant illustrator Ian Moores; and will most certainly make you smile. I loved the extra details of scorch marks on the pages from...ray guns and burn holes, oily smudges and laser beams and what I really love are the authors hand written comments at some of the information; which are often funny and adds a really fun connection between author and reader.
Plus like the Zombie Survival manual you also get The Alien Invasion Exam to pass at the end of the book; which will make you laugh so much! You can then cutout and keep your own Basic and Advanced certificates included at the back of the book; A really nice touch especially for the kids to have and keep up on their wall or even the bigger kids out there...cough...cough..who...me...noo...!
Summary
Jam packed with information, diagrams, facts and figures about the little green...or grey men..bugs, Draconians...and all things ET. Plus how too sections on prepping and combat with different alien species and still maintaining a deadpan face its just a brilliant super-duper read!
I am buzzing about both the Zombie survival book from Sean and this; as if your a complete geek like me and love anything to do with aliens, apocalypse and zombies, get both of these Haynes manuals; they will make a gorgeous pressie for someone fascinated with the unknown or with learning about survival techniques.
I think there will be some people who will believe every word, but on a more serious note I would like to add to any friendly alien out there; lets have coffee round yours and talk ray guns and suntans! But to any Alien Overlord out there wanting to rule the world; then GGR and everyone who has this book looks forward to kicking your ET butt...SIR.
*I received this book from the author for an honest review. checkout my full photoloaded review with animation here http://www.gadgetgirlreviews.com/2014...
October 29, 2014
There was a time when Haynes manuals were, frankly, rather stuffy, step by step books, beloved of those who liked taking a car apart in the garage, and mocked by everyone else. But the publisher has relatively recently realised that the books' distinctive form can be applied to all kinds of different subjects. We've seen, for instance, a maintenance manual for the Death Star and a UFO investigations manual, which took a pretty straight approach to the possibility that UFOs were indeed alien craft.
However, the latest Haynes to join my reviewing shelf is unashamedly a work of fiction - though it technically never admits this, maintaining a straight-faced attitude at all times. The Alien Invasion Owners' Resistance Manual is allegedly written by a member of the UK's 'Ministry of Alien Defence' and is packed full of entirely made up, but entertaining statistics and information on the various alien invaders, their modus operandi and just what it is they're up to. As the introduction states 'This annual is not designed for astronauts, boffins or eggheads. It's for everyone. In true Haynes style, we aim to demonstrate how with the right knowledge, training and the largest available roll of aluminium foil, the concerned citizen can really hit ET where it hurts.'
Throughout, the manual is given the look of being heavily used with oil stains and what may be cigarette (or ray gun) burns on most pages. The author has also kindly 'hand written' comments to add to the information. Someone has put an awful lot of work into this - and it is often very entertaining. I love, for instance, a section which begins 'It may seem strange to readers that while classic TV series such as Firefly are cancelled, reality shows with their "follow-a-nobody" formula are regularly getting into their fifth series,' and goes on to suggest that this might be an alien plot to damage the IQ of humans.
Inevitably some parts work better than others, and once the book has established the main categories of alien and the nature of their ships, it can feel a little bit samey as it then goes through defence strategies and the like. In the end it is a single joke carried to extraordinary lengths. But you have to admire the impressively straight-faced consistency and nice attention to detail (one section is redacted with the remark 'For legal reasons, Haynes Publishing would like to state that a cloaked Draconian vessel did not crash in Nigeria in 1983, and that three reptilian bodies were definitely not recovered and taken to Area 51') - overall it does a far better job than I imagined possible.
What's scary is that it really wouldn't surprise me if some people take this book seriously.
If you want to be prepared, and to have the best design for a stylish yet practical tinfoil hat, this should work for sophisticated 10-year-olds who can get the joke, through to adults who enjoy a good alien invasion romp.
However, the latest Haynes to join my reviewing shelf is unashamedly a work of fiction - though it technically never admits this, maintaining a straight-faced attitude at all times. The Alien Invasion Owners' Resistance Manual is allegedly written by a member of the UK's 'Ministry of Alien Defence' and is packed full of entirely made up, but entertaining statistics and information on the various alien invaders, their modus operandi and just what it is they're up to. As the introduction states 'This annual is not designed for astronauts, boffins or eggheads. It's for everyone. In true Haynes style, we aim to demonstrate how with the right knowledge, training and the largest available roll of aluminium foil, the concerned citizen can really hit ET where it hurts.'
Throughout, the manual is given the look of being heavily used with oil stains and what may be cigarette (or ray gun) burns on most pages. The author has also kindly 'hand written' comments to add to the information. Someone has put an awful lot of work into this - and it is often very entertaining. I love, for instance, a section which begins 'It may seem strange to readers that while classic TV series such as Firefly are cancelled, reality shows with their "follow-a-nobody" formula are regularly getting into their fifth series,' and goes on to suggest that this might be an alien plot to damage the IQ of humans.
Inevitably some parts work better than others, and once the book has established the main categories of alien and the nature of their ships, it can feel a little bit samey as it then goes through defence strategies and the like. In the end it is a single joke carried to extraordinary lengths. But you have to admire the impressively straight-faced consistency and nice attention to detail (one section is redacted with the remark 'For legal reasons, Haynes Publishing would like to state that a cloaked Draconian vessel did not crash in Nigeria in 1983, and that three reptilian bodies were definitely not recovered and taken to Area 51') - overall it does a far better job than I imagined possible.
What's scary is that it really wouldn't surprise me if some people take this book seriously.
If you want to be prepared, and to have the best design for a stylish yet practical tinfoil hat, this should work for sophisticated 10-year-olds who can get the joke, through to adults who enjoy a good alien invasion romp.
November 13, 2014
Given that collectively, the human race has just managed to land a probe on a comet, my latest review seems quite appropriate...
Sean Page has teamed up with Haynes: the straight-laced company behind your Dad’s car repair manuals to bring you the Alien Invasion Owners’ Resistance Manual!
The illustration on the front cover is pitch perfect for the tone of this book; the author blends fact and fiction, peppering the content with references to famous alien movies, tongue firmly in cheek and has crafted a piece of work that is simply bursting with facts and figures about the little green men and all other forms of extra-terrestrials...
Clearly, Page has spent a lot of time in creating this book. The work here is thorough, covering alien encounters throughout history, commenting on aliens having a hand in world events, categorising alien species and craft and of course with this being a Haynes manual, obligatory ‘How To’ sections on prepping, combat and guidance!
Obviously, the Alien Invasion Owners’ Resistance Manual isn’t going to be everyone’s cup of tea but I guarantee that if the cover in anyway piques your interest, the content won’t disappoint.
Wonderfully illustrated throughout and jam-packed with information, if you’re looking for a memorable stocking filler this Christmas for the Fox Mulder in your life, this manual will do the trick!
Sean Page has teamed up with Haynes: the straight-laced company behind your Dad’s car repair manuals to bring you the Alien Invasion Owners’ Resistance Manual!
The illustration on the front cover is pitch perfect for the tone of this book; the author blends fact and fiction, peppering the content with references to famous alien movies, tongue firmly in cheek and has crafted a piece of work that is simply bursting with facts and figures about the little green men and all other forms of extra-terrestrials...
Clearly, Page has spent a lot of time in creating this book. The work here is thorough, covering alien encounters throughout history, commenting on aliens having a hand in world events, categorising alien species and craft and of course with this being a Haynes manual, obligatory ‘How To’ sections on prepping, combat and guidance!
Obviously, the Alien Invasion Owners’ Resistance Manual isn’t going to be everyone’s cup of tea but I guarantee that if the cover in anyway piques your interest, the content won’t disappoint.
Wonderfully illustrated throughout and jam-packed with information, if you’re looking for a memorable stocking filler this Christmas for the Fox Mulder in your life, this manual will do the trick!
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews