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A Nameless Witch
A tale of vengeance, true love, and cannibalism.
Being born undead can have its disadvantages, such as eternal youth and flawless beauty; things most unsuitable for a witch. Hiding behind the guise of a grimy old crone, the witch is content living outside Fort Stalwart with her unlikely band of allies: a troll named Gwurm, an enchanted broom, and a demonic duck named Newt. She leads a simple life filled with spells, potions, and the occasional curse.
So when a White Knight arrives at Fort Stalwart, the witch knows her days of peace are at an end. The Knight is just days in front of a horde of ravenous goblings, and Fort Stalwart lies right in the horde's path. But the goblings are just the first wave of danger, and soon the witch and the Knight must combine forces on a perilous quest to stop a mad sorcerer from destroying the world.
Filled with menace, monsters, and magic, A Nameless Witch is a properly witchly read by the award-winning author of Gil's All Fright Diner and In the Company of Ogres.
Being born undead can have its disadvantages, such as eternal youth and flawless beauty; things most unsuitable for a witch. Hiding behind the guise of a grimy old crone, the witch is content living outside Fort Stalwart with her unlikely band of allies: a troll named Gwurm, an enchanted broom, and a demonic duck named Newt. She leads a simple life filled with spells, potions, and the occasional curse.
So when a White Knight arrives at Fort Stalwart, the witch knows her days of peace are at an end. The Knight is just days in front of a horde of ravenous goblings, and Fort Stalwart lies right in the horde's path. But the goblings are just the first wave of danger, and soon the witch and the Knight must combine forces on a perilous quest to stop a mad sorcerer from destroying the world.
Filled with menace, monsters, and magic, A Nameless Witch is a properly witchly read by the award-winning author of Gil's All Fright Diner and In the Company of Ogres.
320 pages, Paperback
First published May 1, 2007
112 people are currently reading
3449 people want to read
About the author
A. Lee Martinez
31 books2,108 followersA. Lee Martinez was born in El Paso, Texas. At the age of eighteen, for no apparent reason, he started writing novels. Thirteen short years (and a little over a dozen manuscripts) later, his first novel, Gil's All Fright Diner, was published. His hobbies include juggling, games of all sorts, and astral projecting. Also, he likes to sing along with the radio when he's in the car by himself.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 491 reviews
October 29, 2016
Well, I'm crazy 'bout witches, so I should have loved this one.
But, I didn't.
The characters are fine. We have the witch, her sentient broom, her familiar - a demon duck, a modular troll, and a virtuous White Knight who is dedicated to vanquishing evil in all its forms. So far, so good. But the plot drags - there is too much build up to too little conclusion. Over halfway through the book, the characters finally begin their adventure together, setting off on a quest to discover who's been messing with Mother Nature. There are a lot of conversations. The witch lusts after the knight, but worries she may literally devour him with her passion. He has the hots for her, too, so we have the worn-out romance novel ploy of will-they-or-won't-they? To top it off, all foes encountered are too easily trounced, making the action scenes pretty lackluster. In short, this was not a book I looked forward to picking up.
If you're looking for a good fantasy novel about witches on an expedition, I'd recommend Terry Pratchett's Witches Abroad or Carpe Jugulum.
But, I didn't.
The characters are fine. We have the witch, her sentient broom, her familiar - a demon duck, a modular troll, and a virtuous White Knight who is dedicated to vanquishing evil in all its forms. So far, so good. But the plot drags - there is too much build up to too little conclusion. Over halfway through the book, the characters finally begin their adventure together, setting off on a quest to discover who's been messing with Mother Nature. There are a lot of conversations. The witch lusts after the knight, but worries she may literally devour him with her passion. He has the hots for her, too, so we have the worn-out romance novel ploy of will-they-or-won't-they? To top it off, all foes encountered are too easily trounced, making the action scenes pretty lackluster. In short, this was not a book I looked forward to picking up.
If you're looking for a good fantasy novel about witches on an expedition, I'd recommend Terry Pratchett's Witches Abroad or Carpe Jugulum.
February 14, 2012
Maybe it's just me, but the title and the cover art of A Nameless Witch (and even the blurb on the back) had me expecting something almost YA, like Kiki's Delivery Service meets Flight of Dragons or something.
Then comes the part where the witch realizes that she hungers to devour her true love's flesh.
This book gets off to a terrific start: Martinez's style is fast and fresh and fun, and his protagonist narrates with a very witchly no-nonsense pragmatism.
Where magic is concerned, it's clear that we're playing by the "gentleman's agreement" in fantasy fiction, as in, "I promise not to load you down with pages of tedious explication about the rules of magic, and you promise to be okay with character doing magical things as the plot requires with little or no explanation, and I promise not to use said magic to just up and resolve the final conflict with a sprinkle of fairydust."
Since the whole book is only 75,000 words or so, there's hardly any space given to world-building, but the little bits that Martinez includes are both creative and relevant: every other review will tell you about the demon duck, but I much enjoyed the modular troll who can swap out body parts and reassemble himself at need. THAT is some good fun.
I was most invested when the witch and her duck first went out into the world and started carving out a niche for themselves there (because it's a nice idea: here's you alone in the world with cool powers and nothing especially much to do, so what strikes your fancy?)
I got less enthused when things settled into The Fantasy Quest To Defeat Evil With the Bunch of Motley Companions. It was self-consciously written (the witch and her friends are as familiar with this trope as we are) but having the characters be aware that they're participating in the trope doesn't add much zest for me personally. I'm not much of one for romance, even when it's well-executed, and the fact that it wasn't mentioned anywhere on the back of the book made it more unwelcome for me personally than it probably should have been. (Still, I DID like the element of "I love him, but how can I resist eating him alive?", which felt fresh and light-hearted in a way that forbidden-love angst never will.)
Finally, it seemed to me like the story was about the witch, who starts out alone and unique in the world, building up a kind of makeshift family for herself. I think I would have liked it better if that element was a bigger part of the book's ultimate conflict - you know, if the final showdown involved them all doing something together to accomplish what she couldn't do by herself. What happens instead feels more like the plot working at cross-purposes with the theme.
Still, the world definitely needs more of this kind of book, where the characters and the tone are light-hearted and entertaining, but still possess some emotional weight. I will definitely check out more of Mr. Martinez's books, and will suggest the same to anyone else who's looking for a fresh take on fantasy.
Then comes the part where the witch realizes that she hungers to devour her true love's flesh.
This book gets off to a terrific start: Martinez's style is fast and fresh and fun, and his protagonist narrates with a very witchly no-nonsense pragmatism.
Where magic is concerned, it's clear that we're playing by the "gentleman's agreement" in fantasy fiction, as in, "I promise not to load you down with pages of tedious explication about the rules of magic, and you promise to be okay with character doing magical things as the plot requires with little or no explanation, and I promise not to use said magic to just up and resolve the final conflict with a sprinkle of fairydust."
Since the whole book is only 75,000 words or so, there's hardly any space given to world-building, but the little bits that Martinez includes are both creative and relevant: every other review will tell you about the demon duck, but I much enjoyed the modular troll who can swap out body parts and reassemble himself at need. THAT is some good fun.
I was most invested when the witch and her duck first went out into the world and started carving out a niche for themselves there (because it's a nice idea: here's you alone in the world with cool powers and nothing especially much to do, so what strikes your fancy?)
I got less enthused when things settled into The Fantasy Quest To Defeat Evil With the Bunch of Motley Companions. It was self-consciously written (the witch and her friends are as familiar with this trope as we are) but having the characters be aware that they're participating in the trope doesn't add much zest for me personally. I'm not much of one for romance, even when it's well-executed, and the fact that it wasn't mentioned anywhere on the back of the book made it more unwelcome for me personally than it probably should have been. (Still, I DID like the element of "I love him, but how can I resist eating him alive?", which felt fresh and light-hearted in a way that forbidden-love angst never will.)
Finally, it seemed to me like the story was about the witch, who starts out alone and unique in the world, building up a kind of makeshift family for herself. I think I would have liked it better if that element was a bigger part of the book's ultimate conflict - you know, if the final showdown involved them all doing something together to accomplish what she couldn't do by herself. What happens instead feels more like the plot working at cross-purposes with the theme.
Still, the world definitely needs more of this kind of book, where the characters and the tone are light-hearted and entertaining, but still possess some emotional weight. I will definitely check out more of Mr. Martinez's books, and will suggest the same to anyone else who's looking for a fresh take on fantasy.
November 5, 2018
"And his spine just sort of... came out."
My kind of jam.
Aaaaaamazing book. Funny, wicked, a bit carnivore (wouldn't you love to take a nice bite of your lovers ear?), also a little bit philosophical, quirky, peculiar and equal parts enlightening and telling you absolutely nothing. Great for nursing your inner witch or a helping guide how to deal with one. I think it's a fairy-tale retelling done right.
My kind of jam.
Aaaaaamazing book. Funny, wicked, a bit carnivore (wouldn't you love to take a nice bite of your lovers ear?), also a little bit philosophical, quirky, peculiar and equal parts enlightening and telling you absolutely nothing. Great for nursing your inner witch or a helping guide how to deal with one. I think it's a fairy-tale retelling done right.
March 13, 2014
Quick review for what really is a quick book to read.
I enjoyed the first half way more than the second half. Initially it was original and funny. In my comments I had said that if Gaimon, Pratchett and Hendee ever wrote a book, it would be like this and that is what made it fun. But in the second half, that humour got a bit old, which is why I have never been able to finish any Pratchett book I have started.
The story is about an undead witch, who has been cursed with a gorgeous body of an 18 year old, perky breasts and a backside you could bounce a biscuit off. She has a familiar, a psycho demon duck and a troll as a friend and they go off on adventures. Said witch meets White knight on a crusade and the second half of the book develops into how the witch tries to resists banging and eating the virtous knight.
It is light and fun, but like many books in this style, I find them a bit tedious after a while.
If you are sitting by the side of the pool, sipping on a margarita or lying in bed with the flu and not wanting to concentrate much, then this is a good book to cheer you up and put a smile on your face.
I enjoyed the first half way more than the second half. Initially it was original and funny. In my comments I had said that if Gaimon, Pratchett and Hendee ever wrote a book, it would be like this and that is what made it fun. But in the second half, that humour got a bit old, which is why I have never been able to finish any Pratchett book I have started.
The story is about an undead witch, who has been cursed with a gorgeous body of an 18 year old, perky breasts and a backside you could bounce a biscuit off. She has a familiar, a psycho demon duck and a troll as a friend and they go off on adventures. Said witch meets White knight on a crusade and the second half of the book develops into how the witch tries to resists banging and eating the virtous knight.
It is light and fun, but like many books in this style, I find them a bit tedious after a while.
If you are sitting by the side of the pool, sipping on a margarita or lying in bed with the flu and not wanting to concentrate much, then this is a good book to cheer you up and put a smile on your face.
November 6, 2022
Well this spiraled fast from funny to "I can't stand each and all of you".
This had everything to be a fast and quirky read, but the storytelling type proved to be boring and clichéd.
Look, I'm all for crazy insane characters. Like the demon duck in this one. Or the sentient broom.
But then there's the main character. The accursed witch with no name. Who much to her mentor _and savior _ dismay, is quite lovely. -_- Because witches have to be horrendous.
Sure, whatever. But since this was written by a dude, we have to know that she has perky breasts and a nice backside. Well, a lovely figure all around, with a great body and a great face. And let's not forget her hair.
Basically she's a supermodel with a forked tongue. The author likes to remind us of that quite a few times. Ugh.
There's a reason why in most of my favorite books I have no idea of the characters appearances.
And then there's those little tongue in cheek comments, so "smart" and "funny" that the author keeps making all through the story; like blah, blah"...so witchly..." this so "...unwitchly.." that. Well, guess what?
After a while, I couldn't stand them.
If I wasn't in such a book reading slump, with two other books that I'm most certainly going to dnf, this would've followed the same path.
The author pretentious smarty pants storytelling style is just too much for me.
The doomed romance was pathetic and cliché. Thin as my patience and without any real substance. "oh, to kiss him or to eat his nose!"
Who cares?
Finishing this was a chore.
This had everything to be a fast and quirky read, but the storytelling type proved to be boring and clichéd.
Look, I'm all for crazy insane characters. Like the demon duck in this one. Or the sentient broom.
But then there's the main character. The accursed witch with no name. Who much to her mentor _and savior _ dismay, is quite lovely. -_- Because witches have to be horrendous.
Sure, whatever. But since this was written by a dude, we have to know that she has perky breasts and a nice backside. Well, a lovely figure all around, with a great body and a great face. And let's not forget her hair.
Basically she's a supermodel with a forked tongue. The author likes to remind us of that quite a few times. Ugh.
There's a reason why in most of my favorite books I have no idea of the characters appearances.
And then there's those little tongue in cheek comments, so "smart" and "funny" that the author keeps making all through the story; like blah, blah"...so witchly..." this so "...unwitchly.." that. Well, guess what?
After a while, I couldn't stand them.
If I wasn't in such a book reading slump, with two other books that I'm most certainly going to dnf, this would've followed the same path.
The author pretentious smarty pants storytelling style is just too much for me.
The doomed romance was pathetic and cliché. Thin as my patience and without any real substance. "oh, to kiss him or to eat his nose!"
Who cares?
Finishing this was a chore.
November 17, 2007
The only reason this book didn't get a one rating is because the Witches familiar is a demon duck.
I found this to be a boring sketch of an idea rather than a story. Martinez was trying to say something about the nature of belief and reality in the form of a somewhat spoofy fairy tale and he just simply fails miserably. Gil's All-Fright Diner succeeds for me because it a more fleshed out setting and a coherent story that develops characters you care about. Nameless Witch does none of these things. By the end of the novel I had developed such a dislike for the main character that It was impossible care what happened to her.
Still, demon duck.
I found this to be a boring sketch of an idea rather than a story. Martinez was trying to say something about the nature of belief and reality in the form of a somewhat spoofy fairy tale and he just simply fails miserably. Gil's All-Fright Diner succeeds for me because it a more fleshed out setting and a coherent story that develops characters you care about. Nameless Witch does none of these things. By the end of the novel I had developed such a dislike for the main character that It was impossible care what happened to her.
Still, demon duck.
April 9, 2020
I loved this book! The characters were lovely, it was a genuine pleasure to meet them and hang out with them on their adventure. I was so sorry to say goodbye and part. There was a great rappore between the central characters and very witty and enjoyable conversations between them. I loved the humour. Despite the humour, there was very real peril and the pervading sense that one of these characters would not make it to the end. The villain was truly menacing. And romance as well, beautifully played out. Faultless.
January 11, 2020
This book is adorable and awesome. A cursed witch sets out on a journey of vengeance but instead finds purpose, friendship, and love. Martinez writes in a humorous fashion. I thought this book was more fleshed out both in plotline and characters than Gil's All-Fright Diner. Definitely recommend.
May 20, 2017
3.5 stars. A quick read (I just got hung up with other things this month). A good mix of genres and a quirky cast of characters. Enjoyable and fluffy, with a wry sense of humor.
January 24, 2018
A Nameless Witch is yet another of Martinez' humorous novels awash in the supernatural. The humor in this book is more quiet than his previous two and tends toward the wry.
A nameless witch is on a quest ... a quest of vengeance and, hopefully, self discovery. But mostly vengeance. She takes along her contentious familiar, a demon duck. Ok, let me say that again. A demon duck. With a bad case of blood lust. As my husband noted at dinner the other night, this duck is probably the funniest duck in all of recent literature. And his name is Newt.
Along the way, a troll and a knight join the quest. The troll is rather endearing and the knight is virtuous. He is a White Knight. A dark skinned White Knight to be specific.
Nameless is a very beautiful witch. Of course, everyone knows that witches look like hags ... right? So every attempt is made by Nameless to hide her incredible beauty underneath rags and dirt and a carefully placed wart or two. Wyst, the White Knight, is able to see beneath the hag routine and falls in love. She too is smitten, but knows she must hide her increasing attraction to the knight in order to protect his virtue and his life. You see, Nameless is a witch who can not tell the difference between "a smitten heart or accursed appetite." She is afraid she will lose control in the heat of passion and eat him, literally. Ok, so moving on ...
One of my favorite bits pokes fun at the old Norwegian tale of the Three Billy Goats Gruff . The questing party comes to a bridge guarded by a pack of surly elves, goblins and ogres who demand a toll. "As a troll, Gwurm knew something about bridge-tolling" so, of course, he negotiates. Various demands and threats are made by the leader of the surly bunch who ends his diatribe with a laugh meant to send chills down the spines of the hearers. Unfortunately, "elf voices are terrible for sinister cackling." Not in the least intimidated, Newt asks: "Can I kill him?"
On the more thoughtful side, Martinez includes some passages like this one:
"Your conscience is your misery...."
"Conscience is my burden, but all worthwhile gifts have their price...."
"But it could be so simple" the ghoul hissed. "Why hold on to that which only makes your life difficult?"
"Because life is complicated and difficult. Anyone who says otherwise hasn't truly lived."
Martinez throws in a few philosophical musings in A Nameless Witch making it a bit more thoughtful than his previous books, but it remains overall a dark comedy.
A nameless witch is on a quest ... a quest of vengeance and, hopefully, self discovery. But mostly vengeance. She takes along her contentious familiar, a demon duck. Ok, let me say that again. A demon duck. With a bad case of blood lust. As my husband noted at dinner the other night, this duck is probably the funniest duck in all of recent literature. And his name is Newt.
Along the way, a troll and a knight join the quest. The troll is rather endearing and the knight is virtuous. He is a White Knight. A dark skinned White Knight to be specific.
Nameless is a very beautiful witch. Of course, everyone knows that witches look like hags ... right? So every attempt is made by Nameless to hide her incredible beauty underneath rags and dirt and a carefully placed wart or two. Wyst, the White Knight, is able to see beneath the hag routine and falls in love. She too is smitten, but knows she must hide her increasing attraction to the knight in order to protect his virtue and his life. You see, Nameless is a witch who can not tell the difference between "a smitten heart or accursed appetite." She is afraid she will lose control in the heat of passion and eat him, literally. Ok, so moving on ...
One of my favorite bits pokes fun at the old Norwegian tale of the Three Billy Goats Gruff . The questing party comes to a bridge guarded by a pack of surly elves, goblins and ogres who demand a toll. "As a troll, Gwurm knew something about bridge-tolling" so, of course, he negotiates. Various demands and threats are made by the leader of the surly bunch who ends his diatribe with a laugh meant to send chills down the spines of the hearers. Unfortunately, "elf voices are terrible for sinister cackling." Not in the least intimidated, Newt asks: "Can I kill him?"
On the more thoughtful side, Martinez includes some passages like this one:
"Your conscience is your misery...."
"Conscience is my burden, but all worthwhile gifts have their price...."
"But it could be so simple" the ghoul hissed. "Why hold on to that which only makes your life difficult?"
"Because life is complicated and difficult. Anyone who says otherwise hasn't truly lived."
Martinez throws in a few philosophical musings in A Nameless Witch making it a bit more thoughtful than his previous books, but it remains overall a dark comedy.
March 25, 2013
Several reviews describe this book as quirky, and I'm certainly not going to argue there. It plays with tropes to the level of parody - a witch cursed with beauty (and a hunger for flesh), a demon in the body of a duck, a thoughtful troll, a wistful broom, and a true White Knight.
It starts out being a sort of revenge story, but it's really more a coming-of-age/romance kind of book. And there's definitely more in the way of romance than I was expecting. Not that I mind, as it's the "story book" kind of romance that I like (as opposed to the euphemistic kind), I just wasn't really prepared for it.
I think my overall verdict is "cute". I liked the characters in a "hey, they're pretty cool/funny" kinda way, but never really connected with them. Part of this is the narration, I think, which, while written in first person, is also rather distant.
That said, there was a fair bit of wry, slightly twisted humor, which I certainly enjoyed. I never laughed out loud, or anything, but I did find myself smirking from time to time.
As to the quest, I would've liked for their to be more at stake. The witch is nigh immortal - ageless and also very hard to kill. I never really felt like there was any real peril, until the end, and even then it was sort of short lived.
The focus, to me, definitely seemed to be on the romance and the coming-of-age stuff. The quest is sort of a vessel for that more than anything.
So, yeah, cute, quirky, darkly wry, and mostly sweet with a side dish of wistful longing.
It starts out being a sort of revenge story, but it's really more a coming-of-age/romance kind of book. And there's definitely more in the way of romance than I was expecting. Not that I mind, as it's the "story book" kind of romance that I like (as opposed to the euphemistic kind), I just wasn't really prepared for it.
I think my overall verdict is "cute". I liked the characters in a "hey, they're pretty cool/funny" kinda way, but never really connected with them. Part of this is the narration, I think, which, while written in first person, is also rather distant.
That said, there was a fair bit of wry, slightly twisted humor, which I certainly enjoyed. I never laughed out loud, or anything, but I did find myself smirking from time to time.
As to the quest, I would've liked for their to be more at stake. The witch is nigh immortal - ageless and also very hard to kill. I never really felt like there was any real peril, until the end, and even then it was sort of short lived.
The focus, to me, definitely seemed to be on the romance and the coming-of-age stuff. The quest is sort of a vessel for that more than anything.
So, yeah, cute, quirky, darkly wry, and mostly sweet with a side dish of wistful longing.
May 16, 2023
3.5 ☆ rounded up.
It was a cute story, but a little underwhelming.
It was a cute story, but a little underwhelming.
October 12, 2025
The beginning of this was quirky and kind of charming in a way that it felt sort of self pub and cheeky, despite apparently being published by Tor.
Sure, it was weird that the text needed to talk about her sexy body in such adjectives as it chose. And yeah, it was even more weird when she leaves her mentor to set out on her own for the first time and is immediately presumed to be a prostitute. And even weirder still when the second named woman in the whole book is the top prostitute in her new town.
In fact, if you interpret the Bechdel test as two named female characters having a conversation about anything other than a man, then this "witchy" novel would fail. Which is an embarrassment.
Sure, it was weird that the text needed to talk about her sexy body in such adjectives as it chose. And yeah, it was even more weird when she leaves her mentor to set out on her own for the first time and is immediately presumed to be a prostitute. And even weirder still when the second named woman in the whole book is the top prostitute in her new town.
In fact, if you interpret the Bechdel test as two named female characters having a conversation about anything other than a man, then this "witchy" novel would fail. Which is an embarrassment.
July 12, 2018
Mini-Review:
I've read a few books by A. Lee Martinez and these are the things I've come to expect:
- An unusual character.
- A different take on a well known tale/topic/etc.
- Humor (The kind that makes me grin.)
- Not the happy ending you thought would happen.
With this book, I found myself touched by the whimsical flair of love and the different ways that passion could be expressed. I kept hoping that the Witch would be something more than what was told but that didn't really happen. She did end up being very amusing with her bent towards 'being witchly' in her manners. I loved that she was a beautiful monster. How she thought she was hideous for most of her young adult life until she became an apprentice witch. The last part felt a bit rushed in comparison to the pacing for the first half of the book. Yet, it was still satisfying. A lot of the details littered in the story were put into a final place and tied together by the end.
I cheated on the audiospeed but that made it more fun for me. =D
I've read a few books by A. Lee Martinez and these are the things I've come to expect:
- An unusual character.
- A different take on a well known tale/topic/etc.
- Humor (The kind that makes me grin.)
- Not the happy ending you thought would happen.
With this book, I found myself touched by the whimsical flair of love and the different ways that passion could be expressed. I kept hoping that the Witch would be something more than what was told but that didn't really happen. She did end up being very amusing with her bent towards 'being witchly' in her manners. I loved that she was a beautiful monster. How she thought she was hideous for most of her young adult life until she became an apprentice witch. The last part felt a bit rushed in comparison to the pacing for the first half of the book. Yet, it was still satisfying. A lot of the details littered in the story were put into a final place and tied together by the end.
I cheated on the audiospeed but that made it more fun for me. =D
March 15, 2020
Okay, this lonesome star is simply for originality, everything else is just... cringy.
First things first, the two things I loved in A Nameless Witch is how the book doesn't take itself seriously and how witches are portrayed in universe. There's no lets-burn-them-all moments, everyone is as cool as you please, just greeting them and asking what they can do. Which is great! That's the originality part by the way.
Now, to the cringy stuff. The love story between our witch and the white knight. Honestly, the main plot and the heroine's trials are like a 10th of the book, the rest is her talking about how the white knight is handsome and amazing and god's gift to mankind and how she wants him (or to eat him. Literally. As in having him for lunch since she is part Ghoul and all.) This single point alone makes the book so tedious. There's nothing interesting about the characters, her journey, her trials or anything really. You never wonder if they'll make it, because of course they will. I just didn't feel involved at all.
So, yeah. Didn't really enjoy this one, because as much as I love whimsical, uncomplicated books, this one was just a daydream of a teenage girl swooning over a handsome dude, which made 33-year old me want to throw the book at the nearest wall, but sadly, I was listening to the audio book.
First things first, the two things I loved in A Nameless Witch is how the book doesn't take itself seriously and how witches are portrayed in universe. There's no lets-burn-them-all moments, everyone is as cool as you please, just greeting them and asking what they can do. Which is great! That's the originality part by the way.
Now, to the cringy stuff. The love story between our witch and the white knight. Honestly, the main plot and the heroine's trials are like a 10th of the book, the rest is her talking about how the white knight is handsome and amazing and god's gift to mankind and how she wants him (or to eat him. Literally. As in having him for lunch since she is part Ghoul and all.) This single point alone makes the book so tedious. There's nothing interesting about the characters, her journey, her trials or anything really. You never wonder if they'll make it, because of course they will. I just didn't feel involved at all.
So, yeah. Didn't really enjoy this one, because as much as I love whimsical, uncomplicated books, this one was just a daydream of a teenage girl swooning over a handsome dude, which made 33-year old me want to throw the book at the nearest wall, but sadly, I was listening to the audio book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 24, 2009
"Before I leave, I offer these three peices of advice. First, be wary of mortals. They may be small in power, but they are large in number.
Second, remember that people, human or otherwise, are, with rare exception, basically good at heart. Treat them as you would be treated, and you'll almost never go wrong.
And thirdly, and this is something you should never forget, feed a troll and you shall never be rid of it.
SO Martinez does it again - for me anyway!
Meet our nameless witch, an ageless undead girl born into a family who had her by accident, suffering a horrible curse, locked in the basement until her 18th year where she is miraculously rescued by a seasoned witch. This witch teaches her the witchly ways of witches, until one day, the seasoned witch is murdered. Our young undead nameless witch then takes on a dangerous quest to find the person behind the murder, and hopefully make him pay. Along the way, she aquires an interesting motley crew - Her familiar (A talking, demon possessed duck), a troll with removable parts, a virutous White Knight, and a curious fox who is looking for some adventure.
All in all, quite a wickedly hilarious little novel of friendship, accepting oneself/coming into ones own, courage, and the ability to submit to carnal pleasures without tearing its face off in the heat of the moment!
While I will admit the storyline kind of unravels and starts heading south for me towards the end, the entire story as a whole is certainly worth a look! Have you read your Martinez today?
Second, remember that people, human or otherwise, are, with rare exception, basically good at heart. Treat them as you would be treated, and you'll almost never go wrong.
And thirdly, and this is something you should never forget, feed a troll and you shall never be rid of it.
SO Martinez does it again - for me anyway!
Meet our nameless witch, an ageless undead girl born into a family who had her by accident, suffering a horrible curse, locked in the basement until her 18th year where she is miraculously rescued by a seasoned witch. This witch teaches her the witchly ways of witches, until one day, the seasoned witch is murdered. Our young undead nameless witch then takes on a dangerous quest to find the person behind the murder, and hopefully make him pay. Along the way, she aquires an interesting motley crew - Her familiar (A talking, demon possessed duck), a troll with removable parts, a virutous White Knight, and a curious fox who is looking for some adventure.
All in all, quite a wickedly hilarious little novel of friendship, accepting oneself/coming into ones own, courage, and the ability to submit to carnal pleasures without tearing its face off in the heat of the moment!
While I will admit the storyline kind of unravels and starts heading south for me towards the end, the entire story as a whole is certainly worth a look! Have you read your Martinez today?
August 10, 2011
Street Corner TBR Challenge
August pick #3
per Flannery
Well, I didn't really dislike this.... but I didn't really like it either. It was definitely different and unique, sometimes to the point of absolute weirdness.
I enjoy quest books. I do not enjoy books involving cannibalism. This had both. It was off-putting to read this witches thoughts on eating the man she was falling in love with. Yes, it was gross, but it was also sad for her. It was her curse. Throw in a talking, demon duck and a troll who looses body parts and there you have it.
I can't say I'd reccommend this one. I don't regret reading it, however it just wasn't all that and a bag of chips.
2.5 stars.
August pick #3
per Flannery
Well, I didn't really dislike this.... but I didn't really like it either. It was definitely different and unique, sometimes to the point of absolute weirdness.
I enjoy quest books. I do not enjoy books involving cannibalism. This had both. It was off-putting to read this witches thoughts on eating the man she was falling in love with. Yes, it was gross, but it was also sad for her. It was her curse. Throw in a talking, demon duck and a troll who looses body parts and there you have it.
I can't say I'd reccommend this one. I don't regret reading it, however it just wasn't all that and a bag of chips.
2.5 stars.
March 8, 2024
Updated reviews:
Upgraded from 4 to 5 stars. This is fantastic and love the darkly humourous tone.
I think this time around i would call our nameless Witch Rowen. Star crossed lovers kills me though.
Original reviews 28/1/2012
I really enjoyed this whimsical adventure that was reminiscent of The Princess Bride. I adored the quirky characters and enjoyed the plot. My only complaint was that it felt a little rushed; so much packed in for such a short story. It did feel a touch repetitive when mentioning her lust/cannibalism and her need to always hide her beauty.
As for the nameless witch, I was feeling either Serena or Willow...
But in the end, I still loved the journey.
Upgraded from 4 to 5 stars. This is fantastic and love the darkly humourous tone.
I think this time around i would call our nameless Witch Rowen. Star crossed lovers kills me though.
Original reviews 28/1/2012
I really enjoyed this whimsical adventure that was reminiscent of The Princess Bride. I adored the quirky characters and enjoyed the plot. My only complaint was that it felt a little rushed; so much packed in for such a short story. It did feel a touch repetitive when mentioning her lust/cannibalism and her need to always hide her beauty.
As for the nameless witch, I was feeling either Serena or Willow...
But in the end, I still loved the journey.
October 7, 2013
This was an easy, fun read with some real truths tucked away in the corners. The characters were unique and well fleshed out. The Nameless Witch with her curse of immortality was an amazing person who was just the opposite of what people expected in a witch. I loved her wise cracking familiar Newt. The tongue in cheek comedy kept the story light and made it an enjoyable story right up to the very end. This was not a m/m romance and while there was a hope at romance between the witch and Wyst, the story was more about following your own reality. There was a HEA of sorts in my opinion. This was a good book to kickoff the Halloween reading season.
February 26, 2015
I liked this book very much - it reminded me of the movie version of The Wizard of Oz, in a good way. Most surprisingly, the little morals and lessons tucked into the story resonated with me and didn't seem forced or corny. I really wish there was a sequel (at least), but I am reasonably satisfied with the knowledge that I have found a new author with many other worlds for me to discover.
August 11, 2008
"A tale if vengeance, true love, and cannibalism"
This was a wild card book that I just happened to run across in the book store that just looked interesting. I picked it up and I am so glad I did. It was a very entertaining read and I will be looking up some of this author's other books.
This was a wild card book that I just happened to run across in the book store that just looked interesting. I picked it up and I am so glad I did. It was a very entertaining read and I will be looking up some of this author's other books.
April 8, 2010
A light, fun read that went by faster than I would have liked. It reminded me of a fairy tale with an adult edge to it.
This was my introduction to A. Lee Martinez and I have to say that I plan on picking up more of his works soon.
This was my introduction to A. Lee Martinez and I have to say that I plan on picking up more of his works soon.
January 5, 2016
THIS BOOK ROCKS!!!
I loved this book. Perfect for any gal who likes witches and sci-fi all rolled up in one. I read this really fast as I could not put it down and was sad when I came to the end, as I wanted it to go on and on. Excellent story and loved the characters.
I loved this book. Perfect for any gal who likes witches and sci-fi all rolled up in one. I read this really fast as I could not put it down and was sad when I came to the end, as I wanted it to go on and on. Excellent story and loved the characters.
October 15, 2007
Fun read, as all of Martinez's work. The witch protagonist was very well written and her minions are hilarious.
December 5, 2018
Despite the teaser, there is not nearly enough cannibalism in this story.
January 11, 2020
This book took me a LONG time to read. Not because it wasn't good, but rather because it was delightfully pleasant. This book was an afternoon snack that I just spread out over the course of many months, sampling between the heftier meals of my other reads. It's a little weird to think that a book about a cannibalistic witch was the light and fluffy pallet cleanser that I was able to use between the meatier courses, but there you go.
This is a solid 4 stars for me. It was very good, and I enjoyed it a lot. I loved the whimsical fairytale way that it was told, and I think it accomplished exactly what it set out to do. I could definitely seeing myself rereading this in the future. Although I read this as a physical book I would like to pick it up as an ebook, just so that I can have it at hand whenever I need to just.. step over and read a bit. On my next read through I'd also like to give a go for annotating it, or at least keeping a running list of quotes. This is easily the most quotable book I've read in recent memory.
For sure would definitely recommend, especially for those looking for a light-hearted tale and those who enjoy the type of writing style associated with ye olde faerie tales of yore, as it be.
This is a solid 4 stars for me. It was very good, and I enjoyed it a lot. I loved the whimsical fairytale way that it was told, and I think it accomplished exactly what it set out to do. I could definitely seeing myself rereading this in the future. Although I read this as a physical book I would like to pick it up as an ebook, just so that I can have it at hand whenever I need to just.. step over and read a bit. On my next read through I'd also like to give a go for annotating it, or at least keeping a running list of quotes. This is easily the most quotable book I've read in recent memory.
For sure would definitely recommend, especially for those looking for a light-hearted tale and those who enjoy the type of writing style associated with ye olde faerie tales of yore, as it be.
April 9, 2018
This was a fun and surprising read. Maybe the most Ursula Vernon-like book I've ever read that wasn't actually by Ursula Vernon. There's this evil bloodthirsty demonic duck, you see, and a modular troll made out of detachable and interchangeable parts, and a paladin who's only powerful as long as he subsists on dry bread and chastity. And then there's this witch who pretty much knows everything, except how to control the curse on her. There's a lot of eccentric whimsy in this book — there's a sequence with some bandit elves that reads almost like a Monty Python routine — and some of Terry Pratchett's idea of witches, who are basically just very practical women who sometimes see things more clearly than other people, and sometimes put on ridiculous clothes and makeup and accents and lifestyles to fit other people's idea of what a witch is. But there's also a strong sense of justice, drama, and self-reflection in here too. This is a familiar fantasy-quest narrative in many ways, but it's also distinctive and unusual and sometimes just enjoyably silly on the way to a pretty serious ending.
February 21, 2019
I need to find other Martinez books because I really enjoyed this one. It isn't loud or crazy but tongue in cheek and wryly humorous. I enjoyed all of the characters and their adventure was clever and well executed.
This book has been sitting on my shelves for a while and I am so happy I finally picked it up!
This book has been sitting on my shelves for a while and I am so happy I finally picked it up!
June 28, 2023
Not bad, could be better. The pacing is off - it slows down noticeably in the last half of the book. Some of the character descriptions are a little overdone as well, but the interesting characters make up for that deficiency.
There are some humorous parts, but nothing laugh-out-loud funny, at least not to me.
As with most books that deal with “magic” and the supernatural, the lack of a consistent set of rules and definitions diminishes my enjoyment.
There are some humorous parts, but nothing laugh-out-loud funny, at least not to me.
As with most books that deal with “magic” and the supernatural, the lack of a consistent set of rules and definitions diminishes my enjoyment.
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