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Divided: When the Head and Heart Don't Agree
The longest distance in the universe is between the head and heart. For Christ-followers, it is the chasm between what we say we believe in our minds and what we truly believe in our a split between our statements about God and our experience of Him. This divide is everywhere around us, causing untold devastation. It is found in the double lives of believers and in the hypocrisy of church leaders, but mainly we see it in ourselves. It is the default position of every human heart. In When the Head and Heart Don’t Agree, Bill Delvaux exposes this divide and offers strategies to tackle it. The actual journey to cross the divide is sketched out, an epic journey that will take us into our deepest fear and shame and on into the wonder of God’s presence. For becoming undivided is not just another task. It’s the pathway into the very heart of the Father. Features
208 pages, Paperback
First published March 10, 2015
9 people want to read
About the author
Bill Delvaux
6 books8 followersFor the last 20 years Bill has been a high school Bible teacher and running coach. Before that he worked in pastoral ministry as an ordained minister.
With the start of Landmark Journey Ministries in 2012, Bill began working with men. His goal is to help men find their guide in Christ, own their identity in Him, and discover their quest in life.
With the start of Landmark Journey Ministries in 2012, Bill began working with men. His goal is to help men find their guide in Christ, own their identity in Him, and discover their quest in life.
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
March 27, 2015
When I requested a review copy of Bill Delvaux’s
Divided: When the Head and Heart Don’t Agree
I thought to myself, “How does one successfully solve the long debated ‘head vs. heart’ dilemma in under two hundred pages?” I went in with an assumption about what Delvaux was attempting to accomplish, but by the time I got to the final two chapters I realized why the reader was being taken on this journey that never seems to land anywhere. What’s the point, you ask? I don’t know about other reviewers and how they’ll approach this one, but answering that would be akin to spoiling a good movie. This book will catch you off guard—in a good way—if you’re willing to stick with the journey.
Divided is presented in three sections:
1. “Viewing the Divide: How it Began and What It Destroys” — If you don’t connect and relate at the start of this section, just keep reading. Eventually one of the many anecdotes will strike a chord and you’ll find yourself acknowledging your own divide.
2. “Tackling the Divide: Three Terrains to Navigate” — This is where the reader is forced to consider more holistically one’s own story and listening to others in order to better understand the person. Great stuff. Yes, but how does this tackle the divide? It doesn’t matter; just keep reading.
3. “Closing the Divide: What the Journey Feels Like” — So this is where it’s wrapped up in a nice package, right? Notice the subtitle is not “How to Fix It.” Once you get this far, you’re too invested to turn back, you’re not sure why you’re reading but know you need to keep going, and then *wham!* it hits you. “What the Journey Feels Like” is an appropriate description, and it’s only after journeying with Delvaux to the end will you realize the necessity of the journey.
If, like Paul, you struggle with doing the things you know not to do and not doing the things you know to do; if you put on a façade to hide the real you that you think others will hate; if you act and react out of an unknown position that lies in the darkest parts of you that you’re afraid to explore or may not even know exists, then Divided may be what helps you work through it. Don’t expect to be fixed along the way, but expect to be called out and called to action in taking steps toward your own journey through your own divide.
There were some points at which I disagreed with Delvaux’s handling of Scripture (particularly his use of Job), but these aren’t serious enough to affect the larger purpose of the book.
Recommended.
*Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookLook Bloggers book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Divided is presented in three sections:
1. “Viewing the Divide: How it Began and What It Destroys” — If you don’t connect and relate at the start of this section, just keep reading. Eventually one of the many anecdotes will strike a chord and you’ll find yourself acknowledging your own divide.
2. “Tackling the Divide: Three Terrains to Navigate” — This is where the reader is forced to consider more holistically one’s own story and listening to others in order to better understand the person. Great stuff. Yes, but how does this tackle the divide? It doesn’t matter; just keep reading.
3. “Closing the Divide: What the Journey Feels Like” — So this is where it’s wrapped up in a nice package, right? Notice the subtitle is not “How to Fix It.” Once you get this far, you’re too invested to turn back, you’re not sure why you’re reading but know you need to keep going, and then *wham!* it hits you. “What the Journey Feels Like” is an appropriate description, and it’s only after journeying with Delvaux to the end will you realize the necessity of the journey.
If, like Paul, you struggle with doing the things you know not to do and not doing the things you know to do; if you put on a façade to hide the real you that you think others will hate; if you act and react out of an unknown position that lies in the darkest parts of you that you’re afraid to explore or may not even know exists, then Divided may be what helps you work through it. Don’t expect to be fixed along the way, but expect to be called out and called to action in taking steps toward your own journey through your own divide.
There were some points at which I disagreed with Delvaux’s handling of Scripture (particularly his use of Job), but these aren’t serious enough to affect the larger purpose of the book.
Recommended.
*Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookLook Bloggers book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
March 7, 2015
[Note: This book was provided free of charge by BookLook/Thomas Nelson Publishers in exchange for an honest review.]
It is striking that in reading as well as in life, just how often the same problems and essential concerns come up over and over again. This book was written to deal with the divide between the head and the heart, and how it begins in the lies that we hear and believe about ourselves, God, and others that divide us from God, ourselves, and others. This is a book about the heart, full of deeply personal stories about how we overcome the burdens of fear and shame by opening up about ourselves and our fears and longings and struggles, in the knowledge that we are all strugglers here, that no one is immune to all kinds of difficulties. This may seem an obvious truth, but it is one we often forget.
In reading this book, it was impossible not to think personally about my own struggles and that of many people I know with divides between the head and the heart. So many difficulties are connected together–the gulf between what we profess from intellect and what we truly believe in our heart, the pull between longings and duty, our trouble to believe and express the truth, our desire to put on a brave face rather than admit our own vulnerabilities, the fear and anxiety that we struggle with so often. The book is organized in a systematic way but in a way that speaks not only to the intellect but also to the heart, showing how openness, attentive listening to others, and being honest about one’s own story can help repair not only the divides between ourselves, but also in our relationships with others.
Of particular interest is not only the book’s thoughtful approach, its immensely important subject, its honesty and vulnerability about tracing mankind’s internal and external divides back to the Two Trees in a very satisfying way, but the fact that this book is part of a series of excellent books that deal with often neglected subjects in Christian living. This is a book to be read, to be pondered, and to be reflected on and acted on, as we all seek to fill the God-shaped whole in our hearts and to find the life of blessing that we were made for as His children. It is a short book, only 8 chapters and about 180 pages, but within that small size, this book manages to pack some major importance far beyond its modest dimensions, and to strike at the core of our struggles to be people of integrity and sincerity.
It is striking that in reading as well as in life, just how often the same problems and essential concerns come up over and over again. This book was written to deal with the divide between the head and the heart, and how it begins in the lies that we hear and believe about ourselves, God, and others that divide us from God, ourselves, and others. This is a book about the heart, full of deeply personal stories about how we overcome the burdens of fear and shame by opening up about ourselves and our fears and longings and struggles, in the knowledge that we are all strugglers here, that no one is immune to all kinds of difficulties. This may seem an obvious truth, but it is one we often forget.
In reading this book, it was impossible not to think personally about my own struggles and that of many people I know with divides between the head and the heart. So many difficulties are connected together–the gulf between what we profess from intellect and what we truly believe in our heart, the pull between longings and duty, our trouble to believe and express the truth, our desire to put on a brave face rather than admit our own vulnerabilities, the fear and anxiety that we struggle with so often. The book is organized in a systematic way but in a way that speaks not only to the intellect but also to the heart, showing how openness, attentive listening to others, and being honest about one’s own story can help repair not only the divides between ourselves, but also in our relationships with others.
Of particular interest is not only the book’s thoughtful approach, its immensely important subject, its honesty and vulnerability about tracing mankind’s internal and external divides back to the Two Trees in a very satisfying way, but the fact that this book is part of a series of excellent books that deal with often neglected subjects in Christian living. This is a book to be read, to be pondered, and to be reflected on and acted on, as we all seek to fill the God-shaped whole in our hearts and to find the life of blessing that we were made for as His children. It is a short book, only 8 chapters and about 180 pages, but within that small size, this book manages to pack some major importance far beyond its modest dimensions, and to strike at the core of our struggles to be people of integrity and sincerity.
June 11, 2021
What I needed to understand.
May 15, 2015
When I received my copy of Divided in the mail I wasn’t sure what to expect. The topic is a good one and one that needs addressing. However, my expectations were low. Although the topic is an important one, I am not aware of too many who have attempted to address it. Those who have default to the usual formulaic advice. When I read on the back cover that the book contained “ways for closing the divide between your head and heart” I became even more skeptical. After reading the book I can say that it is nothing like what I expected.
Following the tradition of the apostles, Delvaux grounded his solution to narrowing the divide between heart and mind in the gospel of Christ. The solution to not believing in your heart what you give assent to in your mind is not solved by reverting back to the law. It is found in returning to the good news, hearing it again and allowing God to work it into your heart. A list of things to do is an attempt to revive the heart by demonstrating the power of your will. It is, in Biblical language, works of the law.
I am always amazed at how many Christians (including pastors) miss the obvious- when the apostles issue an imperative (a command to do something) they always root it in the indicative (what Christ has already done). So the motivation, the power, and the will to change the heart are not in the command itself, but the good news of what God has done in Christ.
Delvaux gets this, and he is unapologetic in prescribing meditating upon God’s word as a solution to disbelief. This will annoy a lot of people; especially those who really want to believe that they play a major role in the transformation of their heart or who believe that their change is empowered by law keeping . But for those who desire to narrow the gap between their heart and mind, and are aware of their inability and full reliance upon the grace of God, they will find in this book a welcome friend.
If I have a complaint about this book at all, it is that it says very little about the other means by which God changes our heart. Namely the public proclamation of the the word (church), the fellowship (church), the breaking of bread (church) and the prayers (church). In other words, Delvaux missed on a wonderful opportunity to direct the struggling brother or sister to the assembly of believers as we see in Acts 2:42. This is an important component in narrowing the gap between heart and mind. When it comes to living out our lives in the faith, we are not lonely pilgrims, but a communion of saints traveling together. However, I think this may be assumed in what Delvaux is saying. He gives no indication that he believes that we should neglect the fellowship and simply meditate on an island, but is dealing with the reality that we often find ourselves alone and in our solitude, need to battle the dragon of disbelief.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the Refraction Books imprint of Thomas Nelson Publishing in exchange for a review. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Following the tradition of the apostles, Delvaux grounded his solution to narrowing the divide between heart and mind in the gospel of Christ. The solution to not believing in your heart what you give assent to in your mind is not solved by reverting back to the law. It is found in returning to the good news, hearing it again and allowing God to work it into your heart. A list of things to do is an attempt to revive the heart by demonstrating the power of your will. It is, in Biblical language, works of the law.
I am always amazed at how many Christians (including pastors) miss the obvious- when the apostles issue an imperative (a command to do something) they always root it in the indicative (what Christ has already done). So the motivation, the power, and the will to change the heart are not in the command itself, but the good news of what God has done in Christ.
Delvaux gets this, and he is unapologetic in prescribing meditating upon God’s word as a solution to disbelief. This will annoy a lot of people; especially those who really want to believe that they play a major role in the transformation of their heart or who believe that their change is empowered by law keeping . But for those who desire to narrow the gap between their heart and mind, and are aware of their inability and full reliance upon the grace of God, they will find in this book a welcome friend.
If I have a complaint about this book at all, it is that it says very little about the other means by which God changes our heart. Namely the public proclamation of the the word (church), the fellowship (church), the breaking of bread (church) and the prayers (church). In other words, Delvaux missed on a wonderful opportunity to direct the struggling brother or sister to the assembly of believers as we see in Acts 2:42. This is an important component in narrowing the gap between heart and mind. When it comes to living out our lives in the faith, we are not lonely pilgrims, but a communion of saints traveling together. However, I think this may be assumed in what Delvaux is saying. He gives no indication that he believes that we should neglect the fellowship and simply meditate on an island, but is dealing with the reality that we often find ourselves alone and in our solitude, need to battle the dragon of disbelief.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the Refraction Books imprint of Thomas Nelson Publishing in exchange for a review. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
April 18, 2016
Great book. It really gets you thinking about how it is that so many Christians (including myself) know the Bible, know doctrine, and know facts - but living them out, walking by faith and by the Spirit seem so far out of reach. Here's some excerpts:
“Our self chosen idols...become a cloudbank overrunning our hearts, cutting us off from connection to the living God and attenuating our spiritual hearing. We run to them, searching for the water of life, hoping to find something to ease our inward thirst; instead they imprison us. One friend recently admitted how his idol of comfort has kept his heart disengaged from others and from God. Looking for the easy way out always meant steering clear of relational unknowns and potential conflicts, even though he was desparately needed as a husband and father. But the real tragedy of such disengagement is that it has cut off his sense of communion with God. ...In the end, whatever we run to instead of God keeps us deaf, unable to hear his truth.”
“And with our hearts hook [by our idols], we now lose the power to choose our idols. They have chosen us. Our wills become impotent to do what's right even when we know what's right. So when we come to believe in Jesus, in His forgiveness and love for us, these truths initially capture our hearts, but they struggle to make much headway into our daily lives. What we believe to be true feels split off from what we choose in life (Ro 7:19)... The guilt or shame we feel over this divided state of affairs only adds to the split. More information about the truth doesn't help either. It deepens the rift even further. ...But how do we slay the [idol] that seems to have conquered us?"
My only reason for giving it 4 stars was that I would've preferred it spent more time talking about the daily disciplines to close that gap between the head and heart. It covers them to a degree, but not as much as I would've liked.
“Our self chosen idols...become a cloudbank overrunning our hearts, cutting us off from connection to the living God and attenuating our spiritual hearing. We run to them, searching for the water of life, hoping to find something to ease our inward thirst; instead they imprison us. One friend recently admitted how his idol of comfort has kept his heart disengaged from others and from God. Looking for the easy way out always meant steering clear of relational unknowns and potential conflicts, even though he was desparately needed as a husband and father. But the real tragedy of such disengagement is that it has cut off his sense of communion with God. ...In the end, whatever we run to instead of God keeps us deaf, unable to hear his truth.”
“And with our hearts hook [by our idols], we now lose the power to choose our idols. They have chosen us. Our wills become impotent to do what's right even when we know what's right. So when we come to believe in Jesus, in His forgiveness and love for us, these truths initially capture our hearts, but they struggle to make much headway into our daily lives. What we believe to be true feels split off from what we choose in life (Ro 7:19)... The guilt or shame we feel over this divided state of affairs only adds to the split. More information about the truth doesn't help either. It deepens the rift even further. ...But how do we slay the [idol] that seems to have conquered us?"
My only reason for giving it 4 stars was that I would've preferred it spent more time talking about the daily disciplines to close that gap between the head and heart. It covers them to a degree, but not as much as I would've liked.
April 20, 2015
Divided is a book that has the unique ability to make the head and the heart sing together in unison, which is what God has designed for us. What makes Bill Delvaux unique is his ability to bring his years of experience as a Bible and life teacher to make this reading experience a classroom of analyzing how we leverage our passions. By the reading the book, you feel like Bill is there in person encouraging you by using great life questions and providing rich story visuals to bring you along the journey. Use caution as this book is dangerous in that it will ignite something inside of you to 'go' and 'do' what God is stirring deep inside your soul.
February 20, 2016
This book was very hard to read for me. But I do not regret reading it at all. This book is at once challenging, clarifying, and heart-wrenching. In the end, it is a book that gave me hope.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews