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My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family's Nazi Past
An international bestseller—the extraordinary memoir of a German-Nigerian woman who learns that her grandfather was the brutal Nazi commandant depicted in Schindler’s List.
“I am the granddaughter of Amon Goeth, who shot hundreds of people—and for being black, he would have shot me, too.” In an instant, Jennifer Teege’s life turns upside down; the shock of discovering her ancestry shatters her sense of self.
Teege is 38—married, with two small children—when by chance she finds a library book about her grandfather, Amon Goeth. Millions of people worldwide know of him through Ralph Fiennes’ chilling portrayal in Steven Spielberg’s film Schindler’s List. Goeth was the brutal commandant of the Plaszów concentration camp—Oskar Schindler’s drinking buddy, and yet his adversary. Responsible for the deaths of thousands, Amon Goeth was hanged in 1946.
Goeth’s partner Ruth, Teege’s much-loved grandmother, committed suicide in 1983. Teege is their daughter’s daughter; her father is Nigerian. Raised by foster parents, she grew up with no knowledge of the family secret. Now, it unsettles her profoundly. What can she say to her Jewish friends, or to her own children? Who is she—truly?
My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me is Teege’s searing chronicle of grappling with her haunted past. Her research into her family takes her to Poland and to Israel. Award-winning journalist Nikola Sellmair supplies historical context in a separate, interwoven narrative. Step by step, horrified by her family’s dark history, Teege builds the story of her own liberation.
“I am the granddaughter of Amon Goeth, who shot hundreds of people—and for being black, he would have shot me, too.” In an instant, Jennifer Teege’s life turns upside down; the shock of discovering her ancestry shatters her sense of self.
Teege is 38—married, with two small children—when by chance she finds a library book about her grandfather, Amon Goeth. Millions of people worldwide know of him through Ralph Fiennes’ chilling portrayal in Steven Spielberg’s film Schindler’s List. Goeth was the brutal commandant of the Plaszów concentration camp—Oskar Schindler’s drinking buddy, and yet his adversary. Responsible for the deaths of thousands, Amon Goeth was hanged in 1946.
Goeth’s partner Ruth, Teege’s much-loved grandmother, committed suicide in 1983. Teege is their daughter’s daughter; her father is Nigerian. Raised by foster parents, she grew up with no knowledge of the family secret. Now, it unsettles her profoundly. What can she say to her Jewish friends, or to her own children? Who is she—truly?
My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me is Teege’s searing chronicle of grappling with her haunted past. Her research into her family takes her to Poland and to Israel. Award-winning journalist Nikola Sellmair supplies historical context in a separate, interwoven narrative. Step by step, horrified by her family’s dark history, Teege builds the story of her own liberation.
240 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2013
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August 6, 2023
At age 38, Jennifer Teege happened to pluck a library book from the shelf—and discovered a horrifying fact: Her grandfather was Amon Goeth, the vicious Nazi commandant depicted in Schindler’s List. Reviled as the “butcher of Płaszów,” Goeth was executed in 1946.
Teege’s discovery sends her into a severe depression—and fills her with questions: Why did her birth mother withhold this chilling secret? How could her grandmother have loved a mass murderer? Can evil be inherited?
At first glance it becomes clear that this is an important book. I don’t wanna belittle Jennifer’s experiences and I don’t wanna diminish its message. Despite my low rating, I would recommend this book solely for its subject matter and that it’ll make you think about uncomfortable questions, especially if you’re, like me, from Germany, and also happened to be mixed.
Why you may ask? Quite frankly, because I don’t wanna know. It’s a scary subject. Whenever I visited my granny’s in the past I had to sleep on the couch in the living room. Right above my head there was a portrait of my grandfather on the wall. It was drawn by my uncle in the early 2000s. My grandfather is wearing his military uniform. The last thing I saw each day before going to sleep was the swastika right at the centre of his hat. It’s a weird feeling lying there in the dark wondering about your family’s history. I mean, it was the normal uniform back in the day, there’s nothing “unusual” about that in that sense, but why did my uncle draw the swastika, especially since he drew the picture just a couple of years back, and why did my grandma decide to hang that picture on the wall without a second thought?
These are questions that I don’t dare to ask out loud. I don’t want to upset my grandma. I don’t want to have to deal with all of the complications that would come with that confrontation. It’s cowardly and wrong of me to stay silent on this matter, I know that. The only reason why I’m telling you about all of this is that I want to show and acknowledge how important Jennifer’s book is. She was willing to ask the hard questions. She was willing to enter that dialogue with her family, or what was left of it. For that alone, the book is worth a read.
Jennifer suffered a miscarriage. Her grandmother committed suicide. Her mother put her up for adoption when she was four weeks old. She grew up Black in a predominantly white country. Her grandfather killed thousands of Jews. I think there are only few people in Germany who would like to swap lives with Jennifer. Her life definitely isn’t easy and I don’t wanna take away from her hardships.
Nonetheless, the biggest downfall of this memoir is the fact that she couldn’t do anything else but portraying herself as the ultimate victim. She so completely identified herself with her role as “victim” that she wasn’t able to keep things in perspective. I’ll illustrate my point by means of an example, this is a passage from the book about her time visiting the concentration camp Auschwitz-Birkenau:
And there are just one too many moments in this memoir in which I just couldn’t muster any empathy or understanding for Jennifer. As soon as she found out that she was related to Amon Goeth she cut her ties to her adoptive family, the people who took her in and nurtured her for over 30 years. She says that she could no longer call them “Mama” and “Papa” and that she no longer felt part of their family. I mean, Jennifer is allowed to feel in whichever ways she wants to feel and she is allowed to handle her life her way, I’m just left confused by her actions. It just felt like she was deliberately making a mountain out of a molehill. Her birth mom gave her away after four weeks of her life and afterwards they rarely had contact anymore. It’s not like she was that influenced by the Goeths. Her grandfather had been dead for decades before she was even born.
I’m not calling her a sellout or anything like that, but I did find her very hypocritical at times. She claims that her discovery made her yearn for her true identity and that’s why she wanted to find out about her family’s history. I totally understand that. However, she never wanted to know anything about her dad and the Nigerian side of her family. I find that hypocritical. How is her grandfather who has been dead for decades more important and influential to your life than your actual birth father whose appearance you inherited?
Jennifer talks a little bit about the racism that she had to endure as a child: “At children's birthday parties I hoped that no one would look at me when the "N*gro kisses" (= German sweets) were distributed.” and “In Germany blacks are a minority. When we see each other on the street, we give a short nod, greet each other, even if we do not know each other. The dark skin creates a bond.” and “My grandmother showed me around like a doll, she liked the exotic.”
So, throughout her memoir it definitely becomes clear that Jennifer’s dark skin shaped her. It’s a big part of her identity. Yet she blatantly says that she is not interested in discovering her African roots. She claims that she never felt a yearning for her father and that he remained a stranger to her.
Again, it’s all her decision and I don’t wanna come across as too judgemental but I just simply don’t understand how you can claim that you want to “discover your family’s history” and then completely ignore half of it? It’s a fact that German society eats everything up that has to do with the Holocaust, your African roots, however, are of no interest to the general public. I’m not saying she’s a sellout (and that her book isn’t important) but she definitely chose the more “lucrative" path. And that’s just the tea, I’m sorry for spilling it.
Staying on the topic of her coming across as hypocritical: she doesn’t want to be judged by her audience, she adamantly says that “guilt isn’t inheritable” and that there is no such thing as a “Nazi gene”. Again, I couldn’t agree more with her. All of those statements are 100% true. However, in the same breath, she herself is hella judgmental of other people. About Bettina Göring, grandniece of Hitler's Air Force Chief Hermann Göring, she says: “With her decision to be sterilized, she sets a false sign.” Umm, it’s not for you to decide whether that’s a “false” or “right” sign. And Bettina’s decision what to do with her body should forever stay her business and not yours.
So this review turned out much longer than expected. I just felt like justifying my low rating since it is an important book! Without a doubt. I especially appreciated the factual tidbits that were incorporated (which were written by Nikola Sellmair btw). They provided the necessary background information for understanding Jennifer’s musings about her family. Sellmair, in my humble opinion, is also the far better writer. Some of her writing actually brought tears to my eyes, in particular:
Teege’s discovery sends her into a severe depression—and fills her with questions: Why did her birth mother withhold this chilling secret? How could her grandmother have loved a mass murderer? Can evil be inherited?
At first glance it becomes clear that this is an important book. I don’t wanna belittle Jennifer’s experiences and I don’t wanna diminish its message. Despite my low rating, I would recommend this book solely for its subject matter and that it’ll make you think about uncomfortable questions, especially if you’re, like me, from Germany, and also happened to be mixed.
So many harmless grandfathers, so many repressed family secrets. And if soon the last witnesses are dead, it will be definitely too late for the grandchildren to ask the important questions.Word! I couldn’t have put it better myself. Here in Germany, we are thoroughly educated on the Holocaust when it comes to its factual side. Most Germans can give you very specific details about the time before, during and after World War II. However, the more personal side of the argument is almost always neglected. What were our grandfathers doing exactly in that time? Most Germans can’t answer that question. I know I can’t. I never met my grandfather as he already died in 1988. I recently learned that he was imprisoned in 1944 and had to spent some months in America before being sent back to Germany. I don’t know what he did during the war. I don’t know what his political views were.
Why you may ask? Quite frankly, because I don’t wanna know. It’s a scary subject. Whenever I visited my granny’s in the past I had to sleep on the couch in the living room. Right above my head there was a portrait of my grandfather on the wall. It was drawn by my uncle in the early 2000s. My grandfather is wearing his military uniform. The last thing I saw each day before going to sleep was the swastika right at the centre of his hat. It’s a weird feeling lying there in the dark wondering about your family’s history. I mean, it was the normal uniform back in the day, there’s nothing “unusual” about that in that sense, but why did my uncle draw the swastika, especially since he drew the picture just a couple of years back, and why did my grandma decide to hang that picture on the wall without a second thought?
These are questions that I don’t dare to ask out loud. I don’t want to upset my grandma. I don’t want to have to deal with all of the complications that would come with that confrontation. It’s cowardly and wrong of me to stay silent on this matter, I know that. The only reason why I’m telling you about all of this is that I want to show and acknowledge how important Jennifer’s book is. She was willing to ask the hard questions. She was willing to enter that dialogue with her family, or what was left of it. For that alone, the book is worth a read.
Jennifer suffered a miscarriage. Her grandmother committed suicide. Her mother put her up for adoption when she was four weeks old. She grew up Black in a predominantly white country. Her grandfather killed thousands of Jews. I think there are only few people in Germany who would like to swap lives with Jennifer. Her life definitely isn’t easy and I don’t wanna take away from her hardships.
Nonetheless, the biggest downfall of this memoir is the fact that she couldn’t do anything else but portraying herself as the ultimate victim. She so completely identified herself with her role as “victim” that she wasn’t able to keep things in perspective. I’ll illustrate my point by means of an example, this is a passage from the book about her time visiting the concentration camp Auschwitz-Birkenau:
An icy wind blows on the tower. I'm thinking about zipping my jacket. People froze here appallingly. Can I better feel their feelings, their despair, if I leave my jacket open? Do I have to leave it open?I just don’t have any words for this passage. How can you compare a triviality such as “feeling cold” (because you didn’t zip your fucking jacket) to the atrocities that the Jews had to succumb to in Auschwitz? I just don’t understand. You are not the victim here. And then later in the memoir she says that “people who were never depressed cannot imagine what it means to be depressed” which I totally agree with… but how can you then a mere hundred pages earlier compare your zipper-incident to actual torture??? I don’t understand.
And there are just one too many moments in this memoir in which I just couldn’t muster any empathy or understanding for Jennifer. As soon as she found out that she was related to Amon Goeth she cut her ties to her adoptive family, the people who took her in and nurtured her for over 30 years. She says that she could no longer call them “Mama” and “Papa” and that she no longer felt part of their family. I mean, Jennifer is allowed to feel in whichever ways she wants to feel and she is allowed to handle her life her way, I’m just left confused by her actions. It just felt like she was deliberately making a mountain out of a molehill. Her birth mom gave her away after four weeks of her life and afterwards they rarely had contact anymore. It’s not like she was that influenced by the Goeths. Her grandfather had been dead for decades before she was even born.
I’m not calling her a sellout or anything like that, but I did find her very hypocritical at times. She claims that her discovery made her yearn for her true identity and that’s why she wanted to find out about her family’s history. I totally understand that. However, she never wanted to know anything about her dad and the Nigerian side of her family. I find that hypocritical. How is her grandfather who has been dead for decades more important and influential to your life than your actual birth father whose appearance you inherited?
Jennifer talks a little bit about the racism that she had to endure as a child: “At children's birthday parties I hoped that no one would look at me when the "N*gro kisses" (= German sweets) were distributed.” and “In Germany blacks are a minority. When we see each other on the street, we give a short nod, greet each other, even if we do not know each other. The dark skin creates a bond.” and “My grandmother showed me around like a doll, she liked the exotic.”
So, throughout her memoir it definitely becomes clear that Jennifer’s dark skin shaped her. It’s a big part of her identity. Yet she blatantly says that she is not interested in discovering her African roots. She claims that she never felt a yearning for her father and that he remained a stranger to her.
Again, it’s all her decision and I don’t wanna come across as too judgemental but I just simply don’t understand how you can claim that you want to “discover your family’s history” and then completely ignore half of it? It’s a fact that German society eats everything up that has to do with the Holocaust, your African roots, however, are of no interest to the general public. I’m not saying she’s a sellout (and that her book isn’t important) but she definitely chose the more “lucrative" path. And that’s just the tea, I’m sorry for spilling it.
Staying on the topic of her coming across as hypocritical: she doesn’t want to be judged by her audience, she adamantly says that “guilt isn’t inheritable” and that there is no such thing as a “Nazi gene”. Again, I couldn’t agree more with her. All of those statements are 100% true. However, in the same breath, she herself is hella judgmental of other people. About Bettina Göring, grandniece of Hitler's Air Force Chief Hermann Göring, she says: “With her decision to be sterilized, she sets a false sign.” Umm, it’s not for you to decide whether that’s a “false” or “right” sign. And Bettina’s decision what to do with her body should forever stay her business and not yours.
So this review turned out much longer than expected. I just felt like justifying my low rating since it is an important book! Without a doubt. I especially appreciated the factual tidbits that were incorporated (which were written by Nikola Sellmair btw). They provided the necessary background information for understanding Jennifer’s musings about her family. Sellmair, in my humble opinion, is also the far better writer. Some of her writing actually brought tears to my eyes, in particular:
Shortly thereafter, the American investigators found out who Goeth really was. Four former inmates identified him as the former commandant of the concentration camp. When they saw Amon Goeth again in the presence of American soldiers, one of the four witnesses greeted him with the words: "Commandant. Four Jewish pigs lined up!"She really managed to convey the atmosphere of the time and not just its factual side, unlike how it’s mostly done in German schools. All in all, I would highly recommend Amon, it’s an important memoir that’ll make you think.
July 6, 2015
I struggle between giving this 2 or 3 stars. This was poorly written (possibly because it's a translation?), repetitive, and when all is said and done, I really didn't learn much. She always knew who her birth mother was and had some contact with her in her youth, and had a wonderful family that adopted her and loved her and that she loved, but I found it very odd and sad that the minute she found out who her maternal grandfather was she immediately decided to stop calling her adoptive parents mom and dad? What? I realize how incredibly shocking it was for her to find out the truth about who her grandfather was and that her birth mother never shared that with her, but my gosh, how did that justify her then turning her back on her family of almost 40 years. And why is there no photo in the book of her mother? Not sure why this is supposedly an international bestseller or why so many give it such high ratings.
November 18, 2023
Jennifer Teege (a 38 year old woman of African/German ethnicity) discovers she is related to Amon Goeth, the commandant of the Kraków-Płaszów concentration camp. How she comes to terms with this revelation is both heart breaking and uplifting. Her journey to find peace with herself and her family is a version of a journey we must all take.
July 21, 2015
Family secrets are toxic.
Everyone wants to know who they are. I think the question is especially keen for adopted children—who are my people and why am I not with them?
What if the answer to that question brought unbelievable turmoil?
Jennifer Teege is a grown woman with children of her own, part of a loving adoptive family. Despite this, in her late thirties, she is struggling with depression. While in the library’s psychology section, looking for books on depression, she happens to pick up a little red book. On the cover, she sees a photo of a woman who looks an awful lot like her biological mother. She reads the dust jacket—and it is her biological mother, talking about being the daughter of the concentration camp commandant, Amon Goethe. If you’ve seen Schindler’s List, you’ll know of him. Jennifer’s world is torn apart at that moment.
Ms. Teege is a Nigerian-German woman, but looking at the photos of her and of her infamous grandfather, you can see distinct resemblances. Ironically, in her twenties she lived in Israel and did her university degree in Tel Aviv. She speaks Hebrew well and has many Israeli friends. And suddenly, she is afraid of who she really is.
This memoir covers her struggle to come to terms with her heritage and family genetics. It is wrenching and yet encouraging to see her face the situation, despite her depression, and figure out what it all means to her. It also displays the pain and turmoil caused to German citizens when their past is denied or ignored.
If you read this book, I would also encourage you to read Art Spiegelman’s Maus, which is a testament to the psychic damage done to Jews during World War II. Children of both Nazis and Jews have suffered from the silence of their parents and it seems to be the grandchildren and great-grandchildren who will finally be able to speak the truth for all to hear.
November 28, 2022
Jennifer Teege's memoir is incredibly powerful and moving.
At age 38, while in a library, she pulls a book off the shelf and notices it has photos and the names of her birth mother and grandmother. The name of the book is I Have to Love My Father, Don't I? Teege's grandfather (her mother's father) is Amon Goeth, the Concentration Camp Commandant from the Holocaust who is depicted as one of the most evil leaders of the Nazi party in the movie Schindler's List.
Teege is the daughter of Monika Goeth and a Nigerian father. She was placed in an orphanage when she was four weeks old. When she was three-years old, she was placed with a foster family who adopted her at age seven.
Inadvertently discovering this book in the library causes Teege to explore her family's past and to reconnect with her birth mother.
Included throughout the book are personal stories and information about others who are second and third generation relatives of Nazi leaders and how they address (or don't address) their lineage.
Highly recommend!
At age 38, while in a library, she pulls a book off the shelf and notices it has photos and the names of her birth mother and grandmother. The name of the book is I Have to Love My Father, Don't I? Teege's grandfather (her mother's father) is Amon Goeth, the Concentration Camp Commandant from the Holocaust who is depicted as one of the most evil leaders of the Nazi party in the movie Schindler's List.
Teege is the daughter of Monika Goeth and a Nigerian father. She was placed in an orphanage when she was four weeks old. When she was three-years old, she was placed with a foster family who adopted her at age seven.
Inadvertently discovering this book in the library causes Teege to explore her family's past and to reconnect with her birth mother.
Included throughout the book are personal stories and information about others who are second and third generation relatives of Nazi leaders and how they address (or don't address) their lineage.
Highly recommend!
May 19, 2015
I love this book for various reasons.
1: I love fucked up families. It's such a familiar territory.
2: I love Jennifer Teege's personal telling of her story. She doesn't focus on her grandfather, she doesn't make the entire book about guilt or victims or something. Instead, she tells the story of her life and her active search for truth after one key incident: Finding a book about her mother, her birth family.
Basically, she shows how a Nazi descendant without any prior knowledge of that ancestry deals with that ancestry. And that's exactly what I wanted from this book. Happy customer is happy.
3: I love weird biographies. How likely is it that a half-nigerian woman from Germany grows up with an adoptive family and without much knowledge about her birth family, then travels around the world in her late youth and comes to study in Tel Aviv and learn Hebrew, making close Jewish and Israeli friends, only to find out at 38 that she's actually the granddaughter of a Nazi and labour camp leader?
4: It's told in two parts, like a body is going on two legs: One step, one part, second step, second part. Part one is Jennifer's personal account, part two is more factual, illustrating for example Jennifer's time in Tel Aviv with some political background. I find this style to be very refreshing.
5: Lots of literature and movie suggestions.
6: Paragraphs such as this: Maybe Segev's analysis is still to simple: For a good reason did the literary critic and holocaust survivor Marcel Reich-Ranicki protest with the example of Adolf Hitler against the practice to show known national socialists in movies only as monsters. Of course Hitler was human, said Reich-Ranicki, and added: "What else could he have been, an elephant?"*
It is very easy to demonise the prominent national socialists. To observe them like animals in the zoo: Aren't they brutal and perverted! In this manner, one doesn't need to look at oneself, at the own family - and with all the people who participated in the small ways: those who didn't greet the Jew in the house anymore or hastily and without looking walked away when Jews were beaten and their shops destroyed.
*Note: Marcel Reich-Ranicki said this when he was asked about the movie "Der Untergang"("Downfall")(2004) and if it was okay to portray Hitler as human.
Now, I have to find out what my great-grandparents did during the war. Before all my grandparents can't answer anymore.
Also, I still am in favour of mandatory therapy for this whole country. Boy, do we need that...
1: I love fucked up families. It's such a familiar territory.
2: I love Jennifer Teege's personal telling of her story. She doesn't focus on her grandfather, she doesn't make the entire book about guilt or victims or something. Instead, she tells the story of her life and her active search for truth after one key incident: Finding a book about her mother, her birth family.
Basically, she shows how a Nazi descendant without any prior knowledge of that ancestry deals with that ancestry. And that's exactly what I wanted from this book. Happy customer is happy.
3: I love weird biographies. How likely is it that a half-nigerian woman from Germany grows up with an adoptive family and without much knowledge about her birth family, then travels around the world in her late youth and comes to study in Tel Aviv and learn Hebrew, making close Jewish and Israeli friends, only to find out at 38 that she's actually the granddaughter of a Nazi and labour camp leader?
4: It's told in two parts, like a body is going on two legs: One step, one part, second step, second part. Part one is Jennifer's personal account, part two is more factual, illustrating for example Jennifer's time in Tel Aviv with some political background. I find this style to be very refreshing.
5: Lots of literature and movie suggestions.
6: Paragraphs such as this: Maybe Segev's analysis is still to simple: For a good reason did the literary critic and holocaust survivor Marcel Reich-Ranicki protest with the example of Adolf Hitler against the practice to show known national socialists in movies only as monsters. Of course Hitler was human, said Reich-Ranicki, and added: "What else could he have been, an elephant?"*
It is very easy to demonise the prominent national socialists. To observe them like animals in the zoo: Aren't they brutal and perverted! In this manner, one doesn't need to look at oneself, at the own family - and with all the people who participated in the small ways: those who didn't greet the Jew in the house anymore or hastily and without looking walked away when Jews were beaten and their shops destroyed.
*Note: Marcel Reich-Ranicki said this when he was asked about the movie "Der Untergang"("Downfall")(2004) and if it was okay to portray Hitler as human.
Now, I have to find out what my great-grandparents did during the war. Before all my grandparents can't answer anymore.
Also, I still am in favour of mandatory therapy for this whole country. Boy, do we need that...
September 14, 2017
This is one of three books about Amon Goeth that I own and the second one I've read. I knew most of the facts about Goeth but hearing the author's story was interesting and I'm glad I purchased this book. It was well written and I liked the dynamic - several pages about her and then a shorter bit of historical facts. The chapter about Israel was so much fun for me seeing as I spent a couple weeks there last summer. I repeatedly wanted to shout "I know where that is!" and "I've walked down that street!" I really enjoyed this book and I recommend it to anyone who wants to read about people related to Nazi criminals.
July 30, 2018
A biracial woman who was adopted by a German family uncovers a shocking family secret; her biological grandfather was the notorious Nazi war criminal Amon Goeth. Jennifer, who had friends in Israel, read to elderly Holocaust survivors, and had remained estranged from her biological family, was related to evil. What had in happened in her family history that led to this? This was a great read that was overall about putting the past behind us and a journey of self-discovery.
March 12, 2015
Thank you to the publisher and to Netgalley for an opportunity to read an advance copy of My granfather Would have Shot Me. The title does not do justice to this book. Jennifer Teege was born in Germany. Her mother was German and her father was Nigerian. Her mother gave her up for adoption when she was around three. She had a happy childhood with her adoptive family, but had good memories of her birth mother's mother and mixed memories of her birth mother. In her early 20's she spent a few years in Israel, where she made a few very close friends and learned about the Holocaust. By 38, she was back living in Germany, married with two sons. And then she found out that her granfather was Amon Goeth, the Nazi leader who ran the concentration camp depicted in Schindler's list. Up to then, she had absolutely no idea. The book is told in alternating parts by Teege who recounts her emotional reaction to this discovery and a reporter who provides a historical context. The title is misleading. It suggests that Teege's story is focused on her mixed race background and the fact that her grandfather would have killed anyone with her background -- which really would only take a couple of paragraphs. Rather, the book is more complex, focusing on how this information leads Teege to readjust her sense of who she is, her understanding of her grandmother who she had adored and her mother who she resented, and her relationship with her Israeli friends. It is well done and a good read. It took me a while to read this book only because I had to read it my ipad, which I find a bit awkward compared to my Kindle. But the book is very readable and interesting.
November 13, 2017
What an interesting read!
This came across my desk awhile ago and I was arrested by the title so I put it on hold and have just finished listening and my thoughts are all a-whirl because, here's the thing, this could possibly be my story. Not the part about a black woman because I'm white but the part about discovering one's surprise Nazi heritage. I could very well unknowingly have Nazi ancestors and there's no way I would know or even suspect.
Jennifer didn't know or suspect until she accidentally stumbled across a book about her mother while searching the mental health area of the library. In trying to help herself battle depression, Jennifer, instead, found her mother's story right there where she never expected to find such a thing and in that book, she also found that she is the granddaughter of Amon Goeth, the vicious Commandant of Płaszów, he who was portrayed by Ralph Fiennes in "Schindler's List." After learning that, she then had to come to terms with her beloved grandmother being a Nazi supporter who lived at the camp and saw what her lover was doing and did nothing to stop it. How the hell do you come to terms with that?
Well, that's the point of this book, how she reconciled with her new reality.
Most of this book is Jennifer telling the reader her experience, sharing her feelings. She's quite open and honest but also oddly self-involved and unapologetically so. I was wrapped up in her story even as I often rolled my eyes at her actions. But what would I have done differently? I don't know.
Parts of this book, though, is comprised of the narratives of her family, friends, people who are in her life, and people who met her briefly. They offer counterpoints to Jennifer's story, helping to create a fuller, more comprehensive picture.
It's a somewhat exhausting read; it's hard to follow along with someone's turmoil, with the burden of sudden guilt, of fear of how her story will be received by her Jewish friends, the questioning of family and its importance and who family really is. But it ends perfectly, beautifully, and in a glorious human fashion.
I'm glad I listened to this.
This came across my desk awhile ago and I was arrested by the title so I put it on hold and have just finished listening and my thoughts are all a-whirl because, here's the thing, this could possibly be my story. Not the part about a black woman because I'm white but the part about discovering one's surprise Nazi heritage. I could very well unknowingly have Nazi ancestors and there's no way I would know or even suspect.
Jennifer didn't know or suspect until she accidentally stumbled across a book about her mother while searching the mental health area of the library. In trying to help herself battle depression, Jennifer, instead, found her mother's story right there where she never expected to find such a thing and in that book, she also found that she is the granddaughter of Amon Goeth, the vicious Commandant of Płaszów, he who was portrayed by Ralph Fiennes in "Schindler's List." After learning that, she then had to come to terms with her beloved grandmother being a Nazi supporter who lived at the camp and saw what her lover was doing and did nothing to stop it. How the hell do you come to terms with that?
Well, that's the point of this book, how she reconciled with her new reality.
Most of this book is Jennifer telling the reader her experience, sharing her feelings. She's quite open and honest but also oddly self-involved and unapologetically so. I was wrapped up in her story even as I often rolled my eyes at her actions. But what would I have done differently? I don't know.
Parts of this book, though, is comprised of the narratives of her family, friends, people who are in her life, and people who met her briefly. They offer counterpoints to Jennifer's story, helping to create a fuller, more comprehensive picture.
It's a somewhat exhausting read; it's hard to follow along with someone's turmoil, with the burden of sudden guilt, of fear of how her story will be received by her Jewish friends, the questioning of family and its importance and who family really is. But it ends perfectly, beautifully, and in a glorious human fashion.
I'm glad I listened to this.
August 17, 2017
As I read this book, I realized that this is the first time I have read about the Holocaust from the POV of a descendant in a Nazi family. So many of the books I have read in the past have been from the perspective of a victim of Nazi warfare. From time to time I have had fleeting thoughts of what it would be like to be on the Nazi side, especially when reading "Life After Life" and the main character is briefly associated with Eva Braun.
This book opened my eyes to the struggle going on in Germany for the second and third generations as the families find themselves dealing with the skeletons in their closets from the carnage of WWII.
I applaud Jennifer Teege for sharing her journey with us. She is open and honest and we have a front row seat as she works through the trauma of initially discovering her lineage in a library book.
This book opened my eyes to the struggle going on in Germany for the second and third generations as the families find themselves dealing with the skeletons in their closets from the carnage of WWII.
I applaud Jennifer Teege for sharing her journey with us. She is open and honest and we have a front row seat as she works through the trauma of initially discovering her lineage in a library book.
May 8, 2015
Riveting memoir by a black German woman who discovers that her grandfather was Amon Goeth, the mass murdering Nazi commandant called “the butcher of Plaszow.” Teege, the progeny of a white German woman who was the daughter of Goeth’s mistress and a Nigerian man, was put in an orphanage by her mother and then foster care at age three with a family who subsequently adopted her. Her journey into her past, alternating with the first-rate journalism and history by her co-author, Nikola Sellmair, make this both a highly personal book (about the insidiousness of family secrets and an examination of how we are products of our ancestry) and a vivid multi-generational history. Although the story is unusual, there is something universal about it. I couldn’t put it down and read it in two sittings.
May 29, 2015
I wanted to like this book but the writing is very awkward and disjointed, made even more so because Ms. Teege and another person alternate in telling the story. I am not sure if something was lost in the translation but I never connected with the author or understood the feelings and relationships she seemed to be trying to share. I would not recommend this book.
November 10, 2015
Interesting story; bad writing and editing.
January 24, 2020
I have been wanting to read this book for a very long time, so I am glad I was finally able to read it. Jennifer has had such an interesting life to begin with, so when she found out that her grandpa was a famous Nazi, her life flipped upside down in her late forties.
This book was very interesting and I suggest it to anyone that wants to learn about the descendants of Nazis and what they experience and go through, knowing that there are terrible people in their families.
“I am the granddaughter of Amon Goeth, who shot hundreds of people—and for being black, he would have shot me, too.” In an instant, Jennifer Teege’s life turns upside down; the shock of discovering her ancestry shatters her sense of self.
Teege is 38—married, with two small children—when by chance she finds a library book about her grandfather, Amon Goeth. Millions of people worldwide know of him through Ralph Fiennes’ chilling portrayal in Steven Spielberg’s film Schindler’s List. Goeth was the brutal commandant of the Plaszów concentration camp—Oskar Schindler’s drinking buddy, and yet his adversary. Responsible for the deaths of thousands, Amon Goeth was hanged in 1946.
Goeth’s partner Ruth, Teege’s much-loved grandmother, committed suicide in 1983. Teege is their daughter’s daughter; her father is Nigerian. Raised by foster parents, she grew up with no knowledge of the family secret. Now, it unsettles her profoundly. What can she say to her Jewish friends, or to her own children? Who is she—truly?
My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me is Teege’s searing chronicle of grappling with her haunted past. Her research into her family takes her to Poland and to Israel. Award-winning journalist Nikola Sellmair supplies historical context in a separate, interwoven narrative. Step by step, horrified by her family’s dark history, Teege builds the story of her own liberation.
This book was very interesting and I suggest it to anyone that wants to learn about the descendants of Nazis and what they experience and go through, knowing that there are terrible people in their families.
“I am the granddaughter of Amon Goeth, who shot hundreds of people—and for being black, he would have shot me, too.” In an instant, Jennifer Teege’s life turns upside down; the shock of discovering her ancestry shatters her sense of self.
Teege is 38—married, with two small children—when by chance she finds a library book about her grandfather, Amon Goeth. Millions of people worldwide know of him through Ralph Fiennes’ chilling portrayal in Steven Spielberg’s film Schindler’s List. Goeth was the brutal commandant of the Plaszów concentration camp—Oskar Schindler’s drinking buddy, and yet his adversary. Responsible for the deaths of thousands, Amon Goeth was hanged in 1946.
Goeth’s partner Ruth, Teege’s much-loved grandmother, committed suicide in 1983. Teege is their daughter’s daughter; her father is Nigerian. Raised by foster parents, she grew up with no knowledge of the family secret. Now, it unsettles her profoundly. What can she say to her Jewish friends, or to her own children? Who is she—truly?
My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me is Teege’s searing chronicle of grappling with her haunted past. Her research into her family takes her to Poland and to Israel. Award-winning journalist Nikola Sellmair supplies historical context in a separate, interwoven narrative. Step by step, horrified by her family’s dark history, Teege builds the story of her own liberation.
March 8, 2018
Jennifer Teege, a German-Nigerian young woman, arrived at the library after dropping her sons off at preschool. While browsing the shelves, she picked up a book with an unusual title: I Have to Love My Father, Don’t I? As she paged through it, she saw some familiar faces- -photos of her mother and her grandmother. But then, as she read a bit more, she discovered that her grandfather was Amon Goeth, the brutal Nazi concentration camp commandant depicted by Ralph Fiennes in the movie Schindler’s List. And with a sickening feeling, Jennifer realized that her life would never be the same.
This revealing and honest memoir written by Jennifer Teege and journalist Nikola Sellmair focuses on the challenges and contradictions faced by descendants of Nazis as the later generations try to deal with feelings of guilt, hatred, shame, remorse, disbelief and much more. Jennifer’s story is at once heartbreaking yet ultimately hopeful. Readers of Holocaust literature would find this book very interesting.
This revealing and honest memoir written by Jennifer Teege and journalist Nikola Sellmair focuses on the challenges and contradictions faced by descendants of Nazis as the later generations try to deal with feelings of guilt, hatred, shame, remorse, disbelief and much more. Jennifer’s story is at once heartbreaking yet ultimately hopeful. Readers of Holocaust literature would find this book very interesting.
June 8, 2015
“What is family? Is it something we inherit, or is it something that we build? The book was the key to everything, the key to my life. It revealed my family secret, but the truth that lay before me was terrifying. I went to Kraków to get closer to the overwhelming figure of Amon Goeth, to understand why he destroyed my family. I didn’t have the courage to admit who I was to a Jewish tourist I happened to meet. I couldn’t even tell my friends in Israel who I really was.”
More than 60 years after the end of the Holocaust, Jennifer Teege selects a book from a shelf at her local library in Germany. In an instant, her life changes permanently. Recognizing names and pictures of her mother and grandmother, she realizes that her maternal grandfather is the vicious Nazi war criminal Amon Goethe, made famous as the brutal SS commandant in Schindler’s List. Teege, whose mother is German and her father Nigerian, enters an emotional chamber of horrors.
Amon Goeth is among the vilest perpetrators of the Holocaust. In this book, Jennifer Teege gives readers an opportunity to revisit that dark history and its consequences through the eyes—and with the curiosity of—his granddaughter. Because of this knowledge, Teege’s mental health and emotional security deteriorates rapidly.
The book opens old wounds with Teege. She recalls the sadness of living as a black child in a German orphanage and hoping that some family might find her worthy of adoption. This harrowing experience is more deeply explored as Teege continues to research and comprehend who her grandfather was. It reminds her that her mother gave her away and that she could not have a “normal” life as a small child. The trauma ran too deep.
Jennifer realizes that her mother has kept many dark secrets from her. With uncertain steps over the next two years, Jennifer reconnects hesitantly with her mother, Monika, who placed her into the orphanage. The foster parents who love her never realized the true identity of the little girl they took home.
This memoir offers readers some insight into the Nazi concentration camp at Płaszów run by a ruthless SS officer made famous by his mass murders. At the same time, it reveals the depth of depression that Teege was cast into after becoming aware of this knowledge. She soon fathoms that she has entered a chamber of horrors.
Teege states: “Slowly I begin to grasp that the Amon Goeth in the film Shindler’s List is not a fictional character, but a person who actually existed in flesh and blood. A man who killed people by the dozens and, what is more, who enjoyed it. My grandfather. I am the granddaughter of a mass murderer.”
Recognizing that her grandfather was the man who enjoyed killing Jews in cold blood sent Teege into an agonizing depression. The realization that she has many of Goeth’s physical features petrifies her as she questions whether she might resemble the mass murderer in some other way.
Teege learns that her grandmother once lived in luxury thanks to her relationship with Amon Goeth. She was served by Jewish slaves who were assaulted mercilessly inside the villa. Her grandmother must have understood what was happening to the Jews held captive in forced labor at Kraków and Płaszów and who were indiscriminately murdered by Goeth. She must certainly have witnessed Goeth shooting Jews for the fun of it. Yet she apparently did nothing to prevent it, or to escape from it.
Although Teege is raised in an orphanage and later adopted, she has contact as a child with her mother and grandmother. Neither of them reveal anything about her grandfather, the “Butcher of Płaszów.” As a black woman at age 38, Teege comprehends that if her grandfather could meet her now, he would murder her as well.
Jennifer returns to Israel, where the thought of telling her Israeli friends who she really is becomes terrifying. This knowledge sends Teege into a severe depression from which escape seems impossible. In a desperate attempt to resolve her despair, Teege begins a quest to revisit the locations of her grandfather’s crimes and then to return again to Israel.
Jennifer travels to the Płaszów concentration camp and the former Jewish ghetto in Kraków. There, she tours the decrepit ghetto where Amon Goeth “cleared out the Jews” by murdering hundreds of them over 24 terrifying hours.
She walks upon the grounds of the Nazi concentration camp where her grandfather brutalized and murdered innocent Jews for amusement.
She tours the villa where her grandmother and Goeth lived in luxury. This is where Oskar Schindler pays Goeth untold riches to rescue his list of Jews, saving them from certain death.
The alternating narrative between Teege and co-author Sellmair offers a refreshing and ultimately impartial analysis. Teege’s heartfelt commentary and Sellmair’s objective narrative produce a layer of balanced interpretation and insight. Here we find Teege seeking to understand her grandfather’s horrific crimes against humanity while pursuing her own private absolution. And we absorb Sellmair’s impartial interviews with key figures.
Like most books about the Holocaust, My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me leaves the reader with many unanswered questions. It offers a glimpse of the depth of depravity and brutality that Nazis inflicted upon innocent people.
Yet the reader is left wondering how millions of Europeans (not just Germans) were pleased or at least indifferent to see their Jewish neighbors disappear and/or die. We are reminded that racism and intolerance continues to exist today.
The authors confront us with the certainty that people can change—that tolerance is worth striving for and achieving. Teege eventually travels to Kraków and Płaszów to speak to a group of Israeli students about her experiences. Through that catharsis, she tells us that, “There is no Nazi gene. We can decide for ourselves who and what we want to be.”
Charles S. Weinblatt was born in Toledo, Ohio, in 1952. He is a retired university administrator. Mr. Weinblatt is the author of published fiction and nonfiction. His biography appears in the Marquis Who’s Who in America, Who’s Who in American Education, and Wikipedia.
More than 60 years after the end of the Holocaust, Jennifer Teege selects a book from a shelf at her local library in Germany. In an instant, her life changes permanently. Recognizing names and pictures of her mother and grandmother, she realizes that her maternal grandfather is the vicious Nazi war criminal Amon Goethe, made famous as the brutal SS commandant in Schindler’s List. Teege, whose mother is German and her father Nigerian, enters an emotional chamber of horrors.
Amon Goeth is among the vilest perpetrators of the Holocaust. In this book, Jennifer Teege gives readers an opportunity to revisit that dark history and its consequences through the eyes—and with the curiosity of—his granddaughter. Because of this knowledge, Teege’s mental health and emotional security deteriorates rapidly.
The book opens old wounds with Teege. She recalls the sadness of living as a black child in a German orphanage and hoping that some family might find her worthy of adoption. This harrowing experience is more deeply explored as Teege continues to research and comprehend who her grandfather was. It reminds her that her mother gave her away and that she could not have a “normal” life as a small child. The trauma ran too deep.
Jennifer realizes that her mother has kept many dark secrets from her. With uncertain steps over the next two years, Jennifer reconnects hesitantly with her mother, Monika, who placed her into the orphanage. The foster parents who love her never realized the true identity of the little girl they took home.
This memoir offers readers some insight into the Nazi concentration camp at Płaszów run by a ruthless SS officer made famous by his mass murders. At the same time, it reveals the depth of depression that Teege was cast into after becoming aware of this knowledge. She soon fathoms that she has entered a chamber of horrors.
Teege states: “Slowly I begin to grasp that the Amon Goeth in the film Shindler’s List is not a fictional character, but a person who actually existed in flesh and blood. A man who killed people by the dozens and, what is more, who enjoyed it. My grandfather. I am the granddaughter of a mass murderer.”
Recognizing that her grandfather was the man who enjoyed killing Jews in cold blood sent Teege into an agonizing depression. The realization that she has many of Goeth’s physical features petrifies her as she questions whether she might resemble the mass murderer in some other way.
Teege learns that her grandmother once lived in luxury thanks to her relationship with Amon Goeth. She was served by Jewish slaves who were assaulted mercilessly inside the villa. Her grandmother must have understood what was happening to the Jews held captive in forced labor at Kraków and Płaszów and who were indiscriminately murdered by Goeth. She must certainly have witnessed Goeth shooting Jews for the fun of it. Yet she apparently did nothing to prevent it, or to escape from it.
Although Teege is raised in an orphanage and later adopted, she has contact as a child with her mother and grandmother. Neither of them reveal anything about her grandfather, the “Butcher of Płaszów.” As a black woman at age 38, Teege comprehends that if her grandfather could meet her now, he would murder her as well.
Jennifer returns to Israel, where the thought of telling her Israeli friends who she really is becomes terrifying. This knowledge sends Teege into a severe depression from which escape seems impossible. In a desperate attempt to resolve her despair, Teege begins a quest to revisit the locations of her grandfather’s crimes and then to return again to Israel.
Jennifer travels to the Płaszów concentration camp and the former Jewish ghetto in Kraków. There, she tours the decrepit ghetto where Amon Goeth “cleared out the Jews” by murdering hundreds of them over 24 terrifying hours.
She walks upon the grounds of the Nazi concentration camp where her grandfather brutalized and murdered innocent Jews for amusement.
She tours the villa where her grandmother and Goeth lived in luxury. This is where Oskar Schindler pays Goeth untold riches to rescue his list of Jews, saving them from certain death.
The alternating narrative between Teege and co-author Sellmair offers a refreshing and ultimately impartial analysis. Teege’s heartfelt commentary and Sellmair’s objective narrative produce a layer of balanced interpretation and insight. Here we find Teege seeking to understand her grandfather’s horrific crimes against humanity while pursuing her own private absolution. And we absorb Sellmair’s impartial interviews with key figures.
Like most books about the Holocaust, My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me leaves the reader with many unanswered questions. It offers a glimpse of the depth of depravity and brutality that Nazis inflicted upon innocent people.
Yet the reader is left wondering how millions of Europeans (not just Germans) were pleased or at least indifferent to see their Jewish neighbors disappear and/or die. We are reminded that racism and intolerance continues to exist today.
The authors confront us with the certainty that people can change—that tolerance is worth striving for and achieving. Teege eventually travels to Kraków and Płaszów to speak to a group of Israeli students about her experiences. Through that catharsis, she tells us that, “There is no Nazi gene. We can decide for ourselves who and what we want to be.”
Charles S. Weinblatt was born in Toledo, Ohio, in 1952. He is a retired university administrator. Mr. Weinblatt is the author of published fiction and nonfiction. His biography appears in the Marquis Who’s Who in America, Who’s Who in American Education, and Wikipedia.
March 27, 2015
I received this book free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinions or the content of the review.
I never read biographies or memoirs but this one caught my eye. Being of mixed race I have often wondered about my lineage because my mom doesn't know much about my biological father at all. It is something that plagues many people. I found My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family's Nazi Past very moving.I could totally identify with her journey, even if hers was different than mine. I laughed with her, I cried with her, I was angry with her. Her journey moved me. I cannot begin to fathom what she went though as I am sure that words cannot fully describe it. I enjoyed reading this book and would highly recommend it to others.
I also ended up learning a thing or two throughout the pages of My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family' Nazi Past. I felt the book was well written and easy to follow along her path with her. I also thought the added facts help put some things into perspective along the way as well. I think that anyone who struggles with who they are and trying to connect with their past should read about Jennifer's journey. My only complaint would be I would like to know how her life is now after the journey to find truth. How does it effect her everyday life now? Does it still have a profound effect on her life everyday or was she able to truly make peace with her family's secret?
I never read biographies or memoirs but this one caught my eye. Being of mixed race I have often wondered about my lineage because my mom doesn't know much about my biological father at all. It is something that plagues many people. I found My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family's Nazi Past very moving.I could totally identify with her journey, even if hers was different than mine. I laughed with her, I cried with her, I was angry with her. Her journey moved me. I cannot begin to fathom what she went though as I am sure that words cannot fully describe it. I enjoyed reading this book and would highly recommend it to others.
I also ended up learning a thing or two throughout the pages of My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family' Nazi Past. I felt the book was well written and easy to follow along her path with her. I also thought the added facts help put some things into perspective along the way as well. I think that anyone who struggles with who they are and trying to connect with their past should read about Jennifer's journey. My only complaint would be I would like to know how her life is now after the journey to find truth. How does it effect her everyday life now? Does it still have a profound effect on her life everyday or was she able to truly make peace with her family's secret?
April 14, 2019
Ніколя Сельмеєр, співавторка "Амона", у своїх роздумах, які де-не-де переривають та доповнюють розповідь Дженніфер, говорить, що існує три типи літератури про Голокост: власне тих, хто пережив ці жахливі події і ділиться спогадами з іншими; їхніх дітей, які все життя жили в мовчанні, отримавши від цього своєрідну психологічну травму незнання і література "третього покоління" - відкритого до роздумів, яке не засуджує, а розбирається у причинах і шукає розгадки для себе - бо їм з цією історією жити.
"Амон. Мій дідусь мене б застрелив" - книжка власне з третього типу, але з чималою різницею.
Дженніфер Тідж (Jennifer Teege) було 40 років, коли в бібліотеці вона знайшла книгу, написану своєю біологічною матір'ю про Амона Гьота - сумнозвісного і жахливого коменданта Плашува (якщо бачили "Список Шиндлера", то пригадуєте цю постать).
А тепер уявіть таке: Дженніфер - наполовину темношкіра німкеня. З трьох років вона мешкала у прийомній родині (до того часу вона була у католицькому сиротинці, час від часу бачачи рідну матір та бабусю), переборюючи купу проблем через колір своєї шкіри в оточенні (прийомна родина - "біла") і до всього цього вона дізнається, що є внучкою Гьота! Вона каже прямо: я - внучка Амона Гьота, який вбив тисячі людей, а зважаючи на те, що я темношкіра, мій дідусь також мене б застрелив.
Мені надзвичайно важко поставити себе на місце Дженні, але я лише можу уявити, що їй було зовсім несолодко.
Спершу Дженніфер впадає в депресію. Потім розуміє, що їй потрібно з усім розібратися і починає шукати: всю інформацію про Голокост й Амона Гьота, потім - про свою родину.
Чесно кажучи, читаючи останню главу, я не переставала плакати. Обставини, в які потрапила Дженні, усвідомити будь-кому було б важко, а ще важче - не впасти у крайнощі. Співавторка Дженніфер у своїх "вставках" розповідає про внуків і дітей нацистських злочинців, які не витримували осуду і натиску суспільства. Вони ставали неонацистами, покінчували життя самогубством, робили стерилізацію - словом, металися між всіма вогнями, несучи на собі тягар і вибір батьків - нічого не маючи з ним спільного.
Цікавим є те, як склалося життя Дженніфер до того моменту, як вона дізналася правду.
Закінчивши школу, вона поїхала в Париж. Тут 19-річна Дженні знайомиться з єврейкою Ноа і вже через кілька місяців приїздить до неї у Тель-Авів, щоб залишитися на чотири роки: вчити іврит, мешкати в кібуці, вчитися в ульпані, поступити в університет, працювати в Інституті Гете та бути волонтером для тих, хто пережив Голокост. Вловлюєте іронію?
Сама Дженніфер пише, що насправді дуже рада, що робила це все за власної волі, а не тому, що відчувала вину - на той момент вона не знала свого минулого і лишень часом відчувала провину за те, що вона з Німеччини: Голокост, як сказав чоловік Ноа, вписаний у їхнє ДНК. Цього не забрати від жодного покоління.
Знаю, що багато букв, але книжка викликала у мені (зі зрозумілих причин) хвилю емоцій і справжню бурю думок.
Ніколя Абрахам, якого цитує Філіп Сендс у передмові до своєї книжки, говорив: "Не мертві не дають нам спокою, а прогалини, що залишають у нас чужі таємниці". Саме тому за дослідження взялася Дженніфер, саме тому не полишаю архіви і я, саме тому наше покоління таке спрагле історії:
***
Знаєте, що цікаво?
Наприкінці своїх розшуків і усвідомлення родинних таємниць, Дженніфер прийняла участь у екскурсії єврейських дітей Польщею.
17-18-річні хлопці та дівчата разом з екскурсоводами та батьками щороку їдуть з кібуців до Польщі: вони відвідують варшавське гетто, як і їхні предки біжать лісами концентраційного табору Собібор, відвідують синагоги Кракова, затримуються біля пам'ятника у Плашуві, дивляться на безкраї горизонти пекельного Аушвіцу ІІ. За кілька днів вони проживають те, що їхні дідусі чи бабусі проживали довгими роками безвиході, вчаться це усвідомити і намагаються повернутися з важкої подорожі не з ненавистю, а з пам'яттю і розумінням.
Така їхня подорож, а ще більше - їхня мотивація та підтримка на шляху до пам'яті про історію (щоб, звісно, не забувати і не повторити) - здається, це безцінно.
"Амон. Мій дідусь мене б застрелив" - книжка власне з третього типу, але з чималою різницею.
Дженніфер Тідж (Jennifer Teege) було 40 років, коли в бібліотеці вона знайшла книгу, написану своєю біологічною матір'ю про Амона Гьота - сумнозвісного і жахливого коменданта Плашува (якщо бачили "Список Шиндлера", то пригадуєте цю постать).
А тепер уявіть таке: Дженніфер - наполовину темношкіра німкеня. З трьох років вона мешкала у прийомній родині (до того часу вона була у католицькому сиротинці, час від часу бачачи рідну матір та бабусю), переборюючи купу проблем через колір своєї шкіри в оточенні (прийомна родина - "біла") і до всього цього вона дізнається, що є внучкою Гьота! Вона каже прямо: я - внучка Амона Гьота, який вбив тисячі людей, а зважаючи на те, що я темношкіра, мій дідусь також мене б застрелив.
Мені надзвичайно важко поставити себе на місце Дженні, але я лише можу уявити, що їй було зовсім несолодко.
Спершу Дженніфер впадає в депресію. Потім розуміє, що їй потрібно з усім розібратися і починає шукати: всю інформацію про Голокост й Амона Гьота, потім - про свою родину.
Чесно кажучи, читаючи останню главу, я не переставала плакати. Обставини, в які потрапила Дженні, усвідомити будь-кому було б важко, а ще важче - не впасти у крайнощі. Співавторка Дженніфер у своїх "вставках" розповідає про внуків і дітей нацистських злочинців, які не витримували осуду і натиску суспільства. Вони ставали неонацистами, покінчували життя самогубством, робили стерилізацію - словом, металися між всіма вогнями, несучи на собі тягар і вибір батьків - нічого не маючи з ним спільного.
Цікавим є те, як склалося життя Дженніфер до того моменту, як вона дізналася правду.
Закінчивши школу, вона поїхала в Париж. Тут 19-річна Дженні знайомиться з єврейкою Ноа і вже через кілька місяців приїздить до неї у Тель-Авів, щоб залишитися на чотири роки: вчити іврит, мешкати в кібуці, вчитися в ульпані, поступити в університет, працювати в Інституті Гете та бути волонтером для тих, хто пережив Голокост. Вловлюєте іронію?
Сама Дженніфер пише, що насправді дуже рада, що робила це все за власної волі, а не тому, що відчувала вину - на той момент вона не знала свого минулого і лишень часом відчувала провину за те, що вона з Німеччини: Голокост, як сказав чоловік Ноа, вписаний у їхнє ДНК. Цього не забрати від жодного покоління.
Знаю, що багато букв, але книжка викликала у мені (зі зрозумілих причин) хвилю емоцій і справжню бурю думок.
Ніколя Абрахам, якого цитує Філіп Сендс у передмові до своєї книжки, говорив: "Не мертві не дають нам спокою, а прогалини, що залишають у нас чужі таємниці". Саме тому за дослідження взялася Дженніфер, саме тому не полишаю архіви і я, саме тому наше покоління таке спрагле історії:
"Добру половину життя я не знала нічого про своє походження, зараз я знаю правду. Ці знання мене шокували, але також і звільнили. Родинні таємниці мають велику деструкційну силу. Часто відчувала розпач і мала відчуття, що увесь час стою перед якимись закритими дверима. Разом з відкриттям родинної таємниці з'явилася і моя депресія. Після першої подорожі до Кракова мені стало краще. Зараз відчуваю, що мій смуток зник цілком".
***
Знаєте, що цікаво?
Наприкінці своїх розшуків і усвідомлення родинних таємниць, Дженніфер прийняла участь у екскурсії єврейських дітей Польщею.
17-18-річні хлопці та дівчата разом з екскурсоводами та батьками щороку їдуть з кібуців до Польщі: вони відвідують варшавське гетто, як і їхні предки біжать лісами концентраційного табору Собібор, відвідують синагоги Кракова, затримуються біля пам'ятника у Плашуві, дивляться на безкраї горизонти пекельного Аушвіцу ІІ. За кілька днів вони проживають те, що їхні дідусі чи бабусі проживали довгими роками безвиході, вчаться це усвідомити і намагаються повернутися з важкої подорожі не з ненавистю, а з пам'яттю і розумінням.
Така їхня подорож, а ще більше - їхня мотивація та підтримка на шляху до пам'яті про історію (щоб, звісно, не забувати і не повторити) - здається, це безцінно.
August 29, 2015
My Review: The title of this book piqued my interest immediately. And when I found out that it was a memoir written about a bi-racial woman who finds out her grandfather was one of the most brutal Nazis I knew I wanted to read this book because it took a look at the effects of WWII from a totally different viewpoint. It brings to light the question of how the family members of Nazi war criminals came to terms with their family member's horrific past deeds.
Teege gives her readers a glimpse into the history of her birth family. I assumed going in that I'd get a better picture of her grandfather, Amon Göth, the notorious commandant of the Płaszów concentration camp in occupied Poland (who was also one of the main characters in the movie Schindler's List). But this book isn't about Teege's grandfather because she was adopted at a young age and had never met Göth.
Instead the book focuses on how Teege comes to terms with her grandfather's past, her emotional abandonment by her birth mother, her feelings about being adopted (which never felt overly positive) and her time in Israel. I appreciated how Teege struggled to come to terms with the grandmother she loved who had also been Göth's girlfriend. I would have loved to have gone deeper into why and how the grandmother ignored the horrific situations (shootings, beatings ...) that she saw when she lived in an elegant home with Göth just ouside the concentration camp.
Unfortunately the pace throughout the book was very slow and I found that quite a lot of the book was reiterated to the reader. In the end, although the book was written sensitively and thoughtfully I thought that the information given could have been written in a short story format. I appreciated the addition of pages of documentary style information that author Nikola Sellmair provided. It added to the story and gave me a broader idea of the history as well as how others in similar situations dealt with this type of revelation.
Teege brings up some interesting points - If our grandparents commit heinous crimes do we have to share in their guilt? - but i'm not sure that she really got to the heart of the issues. In the end I wanted more from this book and finished it feeling let down. It didn't feel like Teege herself got a lot of closure from her family history. She still felt lost to me at the end of the book and I never felt connected to her while reading her story. In the end I struggled to finish this book and although the author brings up some interesting points I don't think that enough information was given to the reader to make it a compelling read.
My Rating: 2.5/5 stars
**This book review can also be found on my blog, The Baking Bookworm (www.thebakingbookworm.blogspot.ca) where I share hundreds of book reviews and my favourite recipes. **
Teege gives her readers a glimpse into the history of her birth family. I assumed going in that I'd get a better picture of her grandfather, Amon Göth, the notorious commandant of the Płaszów concentration camp in occupied Poland (who was also one of the main characters in the movie Schindler's List). But this book isn't about Teege's grandfather because she was adopted at a young age and had never met Göth.
Instead the book focuses on how Teege comes to terms with her grandfather's past, her emotional abandonment by her birth mother, her feelings about being adopted (which never felt overly positive) and her time in Israel. I appreciated how Teege struggled to come to terms with the grandmother she loved who had also been Göth's girlfriend. I would have loved to have gone deeper into why and how the grandmother ignored the horrific situations (shootings, beatings ...) that she saw when she lived in an elegant home with Göth just ouside the concentration camp.
Unfortunately the pace throughout the book was very slow and I found that quite a lot of the book was reiterated to the reader. In the end, although the book was written sensitively and thoughtfully I thought that the information given could have been written in a short story format. I appreciated the addition of pages of documentary style information that author Nikola Sellmair provided. It added to the story and gave me a broader idea of the history as well as how others in similar situations dealt with this type of revelation.
Teege brings up some interesting points - If our grandparents commit heinous crimes do we have to share in their guilt? - but i'm not sure that she really got to the heart of the issues. In the end I wanted more from this book and finished it feeling let down. It didn't feel like Teege herself got a lot of closure from her family history. She still felt lost to me at the end of the book and I never felt connected to her while reading her story. In the end I struggled to finish this book and although the author brings up some interesting points I don't think that enough information was given to the reader to make it a compelling read.
My Rating: 2.5/5 stars
**This book review can also be found on my blog, The Baking Bookworm (www.thebakingbookworm.blogspot.ca) where I share hundreds of book reviews and my favourite recipes. **
June 6, 2020
I'm not adopted, and I never discovered my grandfather was a Nazi, so I have no right to judge Jennifer Teege's story and reactions. I will say that I was a bit confused by them.
Instead of being adopted as an infant, Teege was old enough to remember and feel completely abandoned when her mother dumped her at an orphanage. A part-Nigerian, part-German child who was judged to be "too tall" by visitors searching for the right child to adopt, Teege was taken in by a loving German couple who had two biological sons. While the family was Caucasian, Teege recalls that she felt like part of the family right away, and that the sons immediately became her brothers. Even though she had a happy childhood with the family, the pain of her mother's abandonment never went away.
As an adult, married with sons of her own, Teege stumbles upon a shocking discovery--a book about Amon Goeth, the Nazi butcher, reveals that he was her grandfather. This calls into question everything Teege had thought about her grandmother: Goeth's lover and the only person in her biological family who had ever made her feel loved.
This is where it gets confusing: the discovery shatters Teege. She sinks into a deep depression and neglects her own children. Then she completely rejects the wonderful people who adopted and raised her, refusing to call them Mom and Dad any longer. She becomes obsessed with the woman who abandoned her at the orphanage, convinced that she is the only family that matters. (Understandably, Teege's biological mother finds her pushy, demanding, and probably a tad creepy. She cuts off contact. Again.) Teege, who had lived in Israel for a time, rejects her Jewish friends to the point they're afraid something terrible has happened to her.
Now, I say this with the blissful ignorance of someone who's never discovered this big a skeleton in the family closet, but I couldn't wrap my head around Teege's reaction. Would I be horrified? Sure. Would I have BIG questions about what kind of woman my grandmother was? Without a doubt. Would I feel a great sadness for Goeth's victims? Of course. But would I let it derail my life entirely, convinced my entire identity and who my true family was (biological versus adoptive) had changed? I can't see it, but perhaps that's only because I've never gone through it.
Teege's selfishness and "Me-me-me" approach once she discovers the news was hard for me to get past. She was cruel to her adoptive parents, and thoughtless to her friends in Israel. It was difficult to like her, connect with her, or understand her. But if you can get past that, she does eventually figure out that who her grandfather was does not define her. And neither does who brought her into the world. She's lucky her adoptive parents' hearts were big enough to forgive her.
Instead of being adopted as an infant, Teege was old enough to remember and feel completely abandoned when her mother dumped her at an orphanage. A part-Nigerian, part-German child who was judged to be "too tall" by visitors searching for the right child to adopt, Teege was taken in by a loving German couple who had two biological sons. While the family was Caucasian, Teege recalls that she felt like part of the family right away, and that the sons immediately became her brothers. Even though she had a happy childhood with the family, the pain of her mother's abandonment never went away.
As an adult, married with sons of her own, Teege stumbles upon a shocking discovery--a book about Amon Goeth, the Nazi butcher, reveals that he was her grandfather. This calls into question everything Teege had thought about her grandmother: Goeth's lover and the only person in her biological family who had ever made her feel loved.
This is where it gets confusing: the discovery shatters Teege. She sinks into a deep depression and neglects her own children. Then she completely rejects the wonderful people who adopted and raised her, refusing to call them Mom and Dad any longer. She becomes obsessed with the woman who abandoned her at the orphanage, convinced that she is the only family that matters. (Understandably, Teege's biological mother finds her pushy, demanding, and probably a tad creepy. She cuts off contact. Again.) Teege, who had lived in Israel for a time, rejects her Jewish friends to the point they're afraid something terrible has happened to her.
Now, I say this with the blissful ignorance of someone who's never discovered this big a skeleton in the family closet, but I couldn't wrap my head around Teege's reaction. Would I be horrified? Sure. Would I have BIG questions about what kind of woman my grandmother was? Without a doubt. Would I feel a great sadness for Goeth's victims? Of course. But would I let it derail my life entirely, convinced my entire identity and who my true family was (biological versus adoptive) had changed? I can't see it, but perhaps that's only because I've never gone through it.
Teege's selfishness and "Me-me-me" approach once she discovers the news was hard for me to get past. She was cruel to her adoptive parents, and thoughtless to her friends in Israel. It was difficult to like her, connect with her, or understand her. But if you can get past that, she does eventually figure out that who her grandfather was does not define her. And neither does who brought her into the world. She's lucky her adoptive parents' hearts were big enough to forgive her.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 29, 2017
The week before I came across this book, I strangely became interested in what happened to the children of the Nazi leaders. I say strangely because I never really even thought about the matter before that time, although I've read quite a bit about the children and grandchildren of Holocaust survivors. I then went online and watched an old 60 Minutes episode of some of the adult children discussing their Nazi fathers. At least two had surgery to prevent them from having children for fear of having evilness in their bloodlines. Thus, I think in some ways it was for the best that Jennifer Teege did not discover who her grandfather was until she was a happily married mother in her 30s.
It was not something she grew up with. Instead, she grew up as an adopted half-black child in a German family. Her family life was good, though, and she was treated no differently than the family's two sons, and the three siblings seemed close. However, when she came across the library book by her mother discussing her grandfather, nothing was obviously ever the same again. This book discusses Ms. Teege's feelings during that traumatic time period, and describes her searches for the truth; as well as her discovery of the stories of other children and grandchildren of Nazis. Coauthor Nikola Sellmair provides an additional enlightening voice, with chapter sections of her own, including discussions with a psychiatrist who specializes in treating those who had Nazi parents.
Since I've read no other books on the topic, I can only guess My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family's Nazi Past is an excellent way to begin research on the matter. Ms. Teege also has Jewish friends and connections to Israel which add an interesting twist to things. Only once when she was discussing the victims of the Nazis did I feel she was being self-indulgent. But that leveled off, and the ending is not one of someone who is forever going to be swallowed up by her grandfather's evil legacy. In fact, one of the most interesting aspects of the story is what eventually happened to Jennifer Teege's depression once she discovered her biological family's past. Unlike what the book's description suggests, she had periods of depression before she came across the library book that changed her life. The discovery is not what created her depression. The discovery is what cured her depression.
(Note: A free e-ARC of this book was provided to me by NetGalley
It was not something she grew up with. Instead, she grew up as an adopted half-black child in a German family. Her family life was good, though, and she was treated no differently than the family's two sons, and the three siblings seemed close. However, when she came across the library book by her mother discussing her grandfather, nothing was obviously ever the same again. This book discusses Ms. Teege's feelings during that traumatic time period, and describes her searches for the truth; as well as her discovery of the stories of other children and grandchildren of Nazis. Coauthor Nikola Sellmair provides an additional enlightening voice, with chapter sections of her own, including discussions with a psychiatrist who specializes in treating those who had Nazi parents.
Since I've read no other books on the topic, I can only guess My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family's Nazi Past is an excellent way to begin research on the matter. Ms. Teege also has Jewish friends and connections to Israel which add an interesting twist to things. Only once when she was discussing the victims of the Nazis did I feel she was being self-indulgent. But that leveled off, and the ending is not one of someone who is forever going to be swallowed up by her grandfather's evil legacy. In fact, one of the most interesting aspects of the story is what eventually happened to Jennifer Teege's depression once she discovered her biological family's past. Unlike what the book's description suggests, she had periods of depression before she came across the library book that changed her life. The discovery is not what created her depression. The discovery is what cured her depression.
(Note: A free e-ARC of this book was provided to me by NetGalley
June 8, 2015
"Family secrets are corrosive".
This is a difficult book to read, because it is a complex story of sadness and abandonment, compounded by the revelation of a horrible family secret. I found Teege to be mired in her sadness, giving insufficient attention to the goodness in her life: her adoptive family, her husband, sons and loyal friends.
Without a doubt, Teege's start in life was not ideal. Her mother is cold and gives her up for adoption. She sees her periodically and develops a bond with her maternal grandmother. Her adoptive family is kind and welcoming, but her mixed race background in the Germany of her childhood (1970's and '80's) sets her apart and makes merging into her new family difficult. She feels the alienation from within, her classmates' questions about her skin color and her father, whom she's never met, chip away at her naturally happy disposition; yet she manages to make her own way as an intellectually curious, adventurous and independent woman who struggles with severe depression. After marrying and having her own family, her life gets upended by the terrible source, it seems, of the darkness. She works hard to uncover truths, face the ugliness of her family history, and accept its effects on her family relationships. Ultimately, loss leads her to comprehend the meaning of family. It's a kind of reconciliation for her, a resolution and acceptance of the circumstances of her birth and upbringing.
I've struggled with this short book, reading only pages at a time, as I reflect upon this complex, and very sad story. I think the root of the sadness is that this is basically the story of a little girl abandoned by a mother focussed too much on herself and the impact of the awful family history.
The last few pages are filled with insight regarding the liberating nature of truth, even revelations about evil in one's family.
Teege is someone I'd love to meet or hear deliver a talk. She's quite unique. Her initial academic interests and friendships are all the more amazing, given that her family's past was unknown to her at the time.
This short memoir is dense with emotion and facts, sometimes in conflict...but the result is to provoke thought, questions, curiosity, and, I'm sure, debate.
Recommend for book groups and academic courses studying the Holocaust and post-war German society.
This is a difficult book to read, because it is a complex story of sadness and abandonment, compounded by the revelation of a horrible family secret. I found Teege to be mired in her sadness, giving insufficient attention to the goodness in her life: her adoptive family, her husband, sons and loyal friends.
Without a doubt, Teege's start in life was not ideal. Her mother is cold and gives her up for adoption. She sees her periodically and develops a bond with her maternal grandmother. Her adoptive family is kind and welcoming, but her mixed race background in the Germany of her childhood (1970's and '80's) sets her apart and makes merging into her new family difficult. She feels the alienation from within, her classmates' questions about her skin color and her father, whom she's never met, chip away at her naturally happy disposition; yet she manages to make her own way as an intellectually curious, adventurous and independent woman who struggles with severe depression. After marrying and having her own family, her life gets upended by the terrible source, it seems, of the darkness. She works hard to uncover truths, face the ugliness of her family history, and accept its effects on her family relationships. Ultimately, loss leads her to comprehend the meaning of family. It's a kind of reconciliation for her, a resolution and acceptance of the circumstances of her birth and upbringing.
I've struggled with this short book, reading only pages at a time, as I reflect upon this complex, and very sad story. I think the root of the sadness is that this is basically the story of a little girl abandoned by a mother focussed too much on herself and the impact of the awful family history.
The last few pages are filled with insight regarding the liberating nature of truth, even revelations about evil in one's family.
Teege is someone I'd love to meet or hear deliver a talk. She's quite unique. Her initial academic interests and friendships are all the more amazing, given that her family's past was unknown to her at the time.
This short memoir is dense with emotion and facts, sometimes in conflict...but the result is to provoke thought, questions, curiosity, and, I'm sure, debate.
Recommend for book groups and academic courses studying the Holocaust and post-war German society.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 29, 2015
I was lucky enough to be able to read the ARC of this. It was on my TBR shelf and then the other day, I was reading a magazine that had book reviews in it and this was one of the books mentioned. After reading that article, I got right up and grabbed that book off my shelf. Im glad I did. It was an interesting perspective from the grandchild of a Nazi commandant. Even though she never me him, what he did affected Jennifer deeply. She felt extreme guilt for what he did and actually removed herself from some of her Jewish friends lives because of it. She also quickly realized that, being of mixed race, this man would have had her killed or killed him herself without a thought. He did it often from his bedroom balcony. Amon Goeth was portrayed also in Schindler's List. Ive never seen the movie, but after reading Jennifer's book, I think I need to.
March 28, 2017
This is just such a bizarre family story and it should have been a four star rating for that. But when it comes down to readability and and having a solid structure, this book was just frustrating. On top of it, despite the emotional topic it left me very disconnected for the most part.
April 5, 2018
The author JT discovering her biological family in a book at the library, was such an emotional scene, I still remember it, a year after reading the book. The book was a page turner, and the two different voices worked for me: JT telling her story and her co-author NS providing historical facts.
August 4, 2020
My Grandfather Would Have Shot Me: A Black Woman Discovers Her Family's Nazi Past by Jennifer Teege is a memoir of a German-Nigerian woman who was put into foster care and eventual adoption with a white German family. In her thirties she was in a bookstore when she stumbled on a book that would change her life. She spotted a picture of a woman who looked like her mother and, after reading some of the description, confirmed that it was her mother who she had seen only sporadically during her life. Even more shocking was the fact her mother's father (Jennifer's grandfather) had been the sadistic camp commandant featured in the movie Schindler's List responsible for thousands of deaths; recall from the movie that he enjoyed shooting at prisoners from his balcony. This added to the inner struggle Jennifer was already dealing with being black in a white society living in a white adoptive family. She has memories of her loving grandmother but learns there was another side to her that she never knew. She felt ashamed of who she was even though nothing was her fault. She had many Jewish friends that she began to avoid because of her notorious grandparents and was torn with feelings of guilt. She visited several concentration camps including the one her grandfather ran and avoided any revealing conversations with others on the tour because of the shame she felt. The book dwells heavily on Jennifer's inner feelings about the dark family history she discovered, maybe a bit redundant. There is no logical reason for her to feel guilt for what her grandfather did just as people generally are not responsible for what ancestors did hundreds of year ago. Definitely worth reading, especially for anyone hooked on WWII and Holocaust.
July 5, 2016
In her late 30s, married with 2 children, Jennifer Teege, the adopted daughter of a German family discovers completely by chance that she is the granddaughter of Amon Goeth, the notorious concentration commandant portrayed in Schindler's List. She knows she is adopted and remembers her birth mother as a rather cold distant woman, but has warm, happy memories of her grandmother who, she discovers was Goeth's mistress/wife. Her life upended, she struggles to understand why she was never told, how to explain this to her many Israeli friends from having lived in Israel for several years, how to integrate this knowledge into her life, and mostly, how to reconcile her loving grandmother with the woman who, to her dying day, expressed her love of Goeth and who would not believe he was at all the monster history portrayed him to be although she was not ignorant of his actions.
The structure of the book is odd as it switches back & forth between Teege's first person account and third person historical narrative. This sometimes interrupts the flow of the story. It also seems to lose some finer points of language in translation. But it is nonetheless a fascinating story; one that highlights the lengths that people can go to delude themselves about what is happening in front of their eyes and the resilience and courage of those who seek to find peace in spite of a painful past.
The structure of the book is odd as it switches back & forth between Teege's first person account and third person historical narrative. This sometimes interrupts the flow of the story. It also seems to lose some finer points of language in translation. But it is nonetheless a fascinating story; one that highlights the lengths that people can go to delude themselves about what is happening in front of their eyes and the resilience and courage of those who seek to find peace in spite of a painful past.
May 25, 2015
I love anything Holocaust/WWII related, and I loved this book just as much. I appreciate Jennifer Teege's very personal insight.
I cannot image browsing in my own library and finding such a haunting book on my own family, let alone wanting to write about it, and its impact for all the world to read. That being said, I give Mrs. Teege a TON of credit. Credit for taking such a history and delving head on into it emotionally, psychologically and physically.
Going into this, I knew Amon Goeth was a murderous man, solely from watching and reading, "Schindler's List." After reading this account however, I have to wonder how many stories are made up about the Nazi officers? How many families have no clue about their family members pasts? How may chose to ignore the truth, and how many were deeply affected by it, just like Jennifer Teege?
For all of you WWII nuts, such as myself, this is a must read.
I cannot image browsing in my own library and finding such a haunting book on my own family, let alone wanting to write about it, and its impact for all the world to read. That being said, I give Mrs. Teege a TON of credit. Credit for taking such a history and delving head on into it emotionally, psychologically and physically.
Going into this, I knew Amon Goeth was a murderous man, solely from watching and reading, "Schindler's List." After reading this account however, I have to wonder how many stories are made up about the Nazi officers? How many families have no clue about their family members pasts? How may chose to ignore the truth, and how many were deeply affected by it, just like Jennifer Teege?
For all of you WWII nuts, such as myself, this is a must read.
June 24, 2015
4.5 stars
Jennifer Teege, abandoned by her German mother and Nigerian father, was adopted by a middle-class family and grew up in 1970s Munich when having dark skin still made you stand out. It wasn't until Jennifer was in her late 30s when she recognized a picture of her biological mother on the cover of a library book and discovered that her mother's father, her own GRANDFATHER, was infamous Amon Goeth, commandant of the Plaszow concentration camp, who used to listen to Beethoven while shooting Jewish prisoners from his balcony and who was brought to the world's attention by the movie "Schindler's List." This is the incredible aacount of a perpetrator's granddaughter coming to terms with her identity, a real life story which is even more chilling when the reader finds out that Jennifer, as a young woman and unknowing of her ancestry, lived four years in Israel and speaks fluently Hebrew. Life writes stories no author could ever dream of.
Jennifer Teege, abandoned by her German mother and Nigerian father, was adopted by a middle-class family and grew up in 1970s Munich when having dark skin still made you stand out. It wasn't until Jennifer was in her late 30s when she recognized a picture of her biological mother on the cover of a library book and discovered that her mother's father, her own GRANDFATHER, was infamous Amon Goeth, commandant of the Plaszow concentration camp, who used to listen to Beethoven while shooting Jewish prisoners from his balcony and who was brought to the world's attention by the movie "Schindler's List." This is the incredible aacount of a perpetrator's granddaughter coming to terms with her identity, a real life story which is even more chilling when the reader finds out that Jennifer, as a young woman and unknowing of her ancestry, lived four years in Israel and speaks fluently Hebrew. Life writes stories no author could ever dream of.
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