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Behind the Curtain

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7 hrs 59 min

Dawson Barnes recognizes his world is very small and very charmed. Running his community college theater like a petty god, he and his best friend, Benji, know they'll succeed as stage techs after graduation. His father adores him, Benji would die for him, and Dawson never doubted the safety net of his family, even when life hit him below the belt.

But nothing prepared him for falling on Jared Emory's head.

Aloof dance superstar Jared is a sweet, vulnerable man and Dawson's life suits him like a fitted ballet slipper. They forge a long-distance romance from their love of the theater and the magic of Denny's. At first it's perfect: Dawson gets periodic visits and nookie from a gorgeous man who "gets" him - and Jared gets respite from the ultra-competitive world of dancing that almost consumed him.

That is until Jared shows up sick and desperate and Dawson finally sees the distance between them concealed painful things Jared kept inside. If he doesn't grow up - and fast - his "superstar" might not survive his own weaknesses. That would be a shame, because the real, fragile Jared that Dawson sees behind the curtain is the person he can see spending his life with.

7 pages, Audible Audio

First published January 5, 2014

23 people are currently reading
992 people want to read

About the author

Amy Lane

203 books3,487 followers
Amy Lane dodges an EDJ, mothers four children, and writes the occasional book. She, her brood, and her beloved mate, Mack, live in a crumbling mortgage in Citrus Heights, California, which is riddled with spiders, cats, and more than its share of fancy and weirdness. Feel free to visit her at www.greenshill.com orwww.writerslane.blogspot.com, where she will ride the buzz of receiving your e-mail until her head swells and she can no longer leave the house.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 199 reviews
Profile Image for Heather K (dentist in my spare time).
4,108 reviews6,670 followers
January 14, 2014
I'm sorry to say that this wasn't my favorite Amy Lane.

In all fairness, I recently read two Amy Lane's that blew me away (Truth in the Dark and Christmas Kitsch) and this one just withered in comparison.

There was something about the writing in this book that felt off to me. There were lots of little time jumps and there was almost a spazzy style to it (maybe like Dawson, the main character?). The kind of choppy, non-sequiturish writing was hard for me to get into, and this book took me days to finish. To compare, I usually stay up all night to finish an Amy Lane book.

I also had some trouble getting into Dawson and Jared as a couple. I didn't connect with them much and felt oddly aloof towards them. I'm not sure why. I liked the straight best friend in Benji but I kept comparing the relationship between Benji and Dawson to Deacon and Jon from Keeping Promise Rock.

Despite all of my little issues, this book has many lovely qualities. The ending was really wonderful and the character of Dawson's dad was fabulous. I also liked how Dawson was a fully unique character. I got a really firm sense of who he was and what drove him. I loved his abashed enthusiasm for sex and his grasp of right and wrong.

Looking back at this book, I enjoyed it but feel a little disappointed because I was hoping for another slam-dunk-Amy-Lane.

**Copy provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review**
Profile Image for Tina.
1,782 reviews1 follower
March 22, 2014

First of all I have to admit something shocking. I’m a Amy Lane virgin. Perhaps the only one in the whole M/M universe. I've only read the Country Mouse series, her collaboration with Aleks Voinov. So I dived head-first into this story and damn, it impressed the hell out of me.

Dawson and his very best friend Benji are running a community college theater in Rocklin, California. They belong to the people who pull the curtain, and write the plays and make the costumes, the people who make the dream but who don’t live it on the front of the stage. Dawson’s world is very small and sheltered and he is the most loveably sweet guy anyone could ever hope to meet. He’s just hilarious and so damn cute I couldn't help but fall in love with him instantly.

When one day Jared Emory, dance superstar of the Los Angeles Ballet shows up at the theater, Dawson’s sheltered world turns upside down, because nothing prepared him for falling on Jared’s head. Literally!

Watching Jared and Dawson’s relationship grow is so heartwarming. It isn’t insta-love as I normally read in these types of books. The relationship has time to grow and there is no sex at first sight. They fall in love during an all-night conversation at Denny’s, a diner full of magic, so it seems.
„Don’t underestimate Denny’s… There’s magic at Denny’s.“… „Well see? You can’t doubt magic, then. And you shouldn’t doubt us. Not yet. Not when magic and hard work still have a chance.“

Given Jared’s dancing career in Los Angeles they start a long-distance romance. Even though his body begins to struggle, Jared is obsessed with his dancing.
“I dream sometimes,” he said through a raspy chest. “I dream I can’t move. My body is frozen, and I’m invisible, and I wake up sweating, checking my bones, checking my knees and my feet. I’m terrified I’ll never fly again. I’ll be trapped flat on the ground like a rock. Like I’m already dead. That’s dance. I need it to breathe.”

Dolph, his sleaze ball of agent doesn’t help him at all, when Jared’s knee is finally badly injured. He wants nothing more than to keep him doped up and shove him on the stage, milk him and throw him away once he’s used up. Jared, reserved and lonely Jared. I felt the urge to protect him, to care for him and most of all give this Dolph guy a kick in the ass for the things he expects Jared to put up with… and his parents, for abandoning him.

However, when at some point Jared shows up sick and desperate Dawson finally realises that Jared might not survive his dancing obsession all alone. He starts to see the man behind the curtain, the real, fragile Jared, who thinks poorly of himself. If Dawson wants to spend his life with him, he has to stand up for Jared and take over the reins.
“Do you have any idea how much I’d give—how much I’d dance, how far I’d run, for you to not know any bad thing about me?… But I have to tell you these things, and I think, ‘Oh God. I am the worst thing to happen to Dawson’s life, and I suck.’”

Benji is the ultimate secondary character. I have trouble finding words to describe Dawson’s wonderful friend and the brother of his heart. He is a great friend, strong, smart and supportive yet vulnerable. And I don’t want to forget Stan, Dawson’s wonderful dad, Darian, Benji’s girlfriend and Amber, the sad goth girl.
“You can stay the night and everything.”
Jared’s lips quirked up. “Are you sure Benji won’t greet me in the morning with a shotgun?”
“Not if you make him french toast. He’ll totally sell me out for someone who cooks.”

Behind the Curtain was a fantastic read. I really have no words to describe how much I enjoyed this book. Everything about it. The writing is exceptional. Each scene is carefully worded to bring every emotion to life, the happiness, the loneliness, the humour and the heartbreak. The story of Dawson and Jared is simply amazing! I laughed with them, I cried with them, pushed with them through their struggles. The things they have to endure are heartbreaking and at times I didn't know if they could get over it. But leave it to Amy Lane to bring it all together seamlessly.

Overall, let me tell you about my résumé after popping my Amy Lane sherry: Amy can rock the socks off a blank piece of paper. The rhythm of the words, the flow of the story, her style is just brilliant. I fell as hard for the author as I fell for the characters.

Highly recommended! Now off to track down more of Amy Lane’s books. I guess I have lots of reading to do…



Profile Image for SheReadsALot.
1,860 reviews1,266 followers
Want to read
August 31, 2016
So what you're saying is that I might as well pay down on my ice cream aka cure-all for those heavy angsty nuggets Amy delivers oh so well?



P.S. I think I got a cover boner. I think it's rad.
Profile Image for Kaje Harper.
Author 91 books2,727 followers
January 9, 2014
This book feels like prototypical Amy Lane, in story arc, characters, and phrasing... which is a good thing. She's an autobuy author for me.

Dawson is young, intense and humorous by turns, prone to italics and yet in other ways very grounded in family, friends, and what matters in life. His POV narration has moments of excellent humor, and of heart-tugging angst. His best friend Benji is wonderful, staunch and supportive, het and not even curious but behind Dawson in every way.

Jared is the character who will break your heart a little, a professional dancer with a life so pared down to nothing that all that exists is his body and the stage, in the celebration of dance. Until he meets Dawson. Jared has been alone for so long, and has tried to connect with users and losers often enough, that he barely knows what to do with a guy like Dawson. But if he can figure it out, he has a taste of the love and family that Dawson can wrap around him. Unfortunately, the job that is life and breath to him is out of town, and his agent and the company he dances with are determined to keep that his first priority, above not just Dawson but even Jared's own health and longevity. The show must go on. But at what cost?

There is a nice cast of secondary characters, including women, which I always appreciate about Amy's books. Dawson is a bit pushy and demanding, but it makes sense, because he's trying to get for Jared what Jared doesn't seem to realize he deserves for himself. Jared is a bit passive - again appropriate given the life he has had, and the way he threw all of himself into dance until there was very little left. I wanted to go beat the crap out of a couple of people on his behalf myself. This book didn't get into the marrow of my bones, the way some Amy Lane books do, but it will be a reread without a doubt.
Profile Image for Amy.
1,030 reviews100 followers
November 19, 2014
Amy Lane is an auto-buy author for me. According to Goodreads she is my “most read author.” I will read just about anything she writes. If she writes a manual on learning to knit, I will read it. I love her stories, her characters and her writing style. Okay, I’m done gushing. Seriously though, I really loved this book!

Dawson is a behind-the-scenes stage tech. He does light and sound engineering, handles the props, etc. He reminded me a bit of Patrick (from Clear Water) who is one of my favorite characters of all time. He’s quirky and funny and a bit of a spaz-puppy!

And then there’s Jared Emory, star of the Los Angeles Ballet. He loves the spotlight and acts like a diva, but behind the mask, there’s a lot of pain and sadness. You will fall in love with both of them as well as their group of friends… Benji, Darian, and Amber. Flawless writing, lots of quotable dialog, absolute perfection!!!
Profile Image for BWT.
2,250 reviews244 followers
January 2, 2016
Belens Audio Book Review

I thoroughly enjoyed this. It's a sweet, humorous, and romantic love story. Of course, since this is Amy Lane, you have to know the other shoe will drop and your heart will be ripped out at some point. Because that's how Amy Lane rolls.

Crying

I loved both characters and thought their long-distance relationship was handled really well. Hugh Bradley's narration kept me entertained, the story got me to laugh and ugly cry (in public no less, thanks Amy Lane!), and I was rooting for Dawson and Jared until the very end.

The supporting characters here, Benji, Darian, Amber, Dawson's dad elevated this for me from a sweet, lovely story, to one of the top three Amy Lane books I've read. I had one issue with the whole agent mess toward the end which I didn't buy in the slightest and felt was misplaced, but other than that niggle, I had a great time listening to this and wouldn't hesitate to recommend this, especially for those who enjoy the lighter angst-filled side of Amy Lane.

Kudos

This review has been cross-posted at Reviews by Jessewave.
Profile Image for MaDoReader.
1,356 reviews167 followers
August 9, 2016
Ronda de bailarines, toma 2.

Aquí ando con sentimientos encontrados, ellos me gustan, pero me parece una situación bastante wtf? No veo dónde se agarran para que eso crezca, la autora nos da pistas pero todofuera de página...

Al final lo que más me ha gustado ha sido la parte final rollo culebrón malo del sábado... ¿quién me entiende?
Profile Image for Kade Boehme.
Author 37 books1,046 followers
January 10, 2014
Yes yes yes. Just yes. See. I fell in love with Amy Lane because she does some hard core, kick ass, ugly tears angst. Like, she's blown me away many a time and I seriously stand behind every good review, every 5 stars that I give her. I play the fangirl with Amy because, well it happens when you love someone's work so much, but by definition fangirls don't actually enjoy something for its depth so much as what that thing or person represents. Nah. Amy I'm a fan of because she's got chops--mad skills. I know when I pick up a book she's gonna make my heart bleed and then she's gonna sooth it so nicely with a happily ever after that's full of family and hope and fucking bunnies.

Then there are books like this. Books like my personal favorite Amy Lane book, one of my favorite M/Ms period, Clear Water. They've got little angst and alot of happy. The characters you pull for and adore and the men who love them. And DAMN I was such a sucker for Jared in this book with his poor lonely heart and gah Dawson was just perfect for him, that little slice of charmed and unsullied innocence in a world that had been kinda shitty to poor Jared.

So I definitely recommend. None of that angst and pain, just good old lovin' for a couple of guys who deserved it and who were willing to work for it. (Oh and Benji, we love you too).

PS: Amy made me happy with another reference to one of her old favorites of mine. I was like SHUT UP! So. Good stuff.
Profile Image for SueC.
112 reviews
May 6, 2014
***Virgin alert!*** *** Angst Fest!***

I can imagine Amy Lane sitting in a rocking chair, in peels of laughter and gasping for air as she watches her readers via live webcams go through the pain and pleasure of another one of her cutesy love stories. In Behind the Curtain, she takes two different characters, throws in some innocence, makes us fall in love with them and then spices it up with lots of boners; then she adds some heartache, rips our hearts out and places them in a blender at maximum speed. And voila! It’s an ALane classic!

So this was about sweet, adorable, klutzy Dawson with his protruding hips, elbows and ears, and stoic, dry, handsome Jared. The story seemed almost equally focused on Dawson’s friends: there’s dream-come-true best friend Benji who’s always seen Dawson as simply a person – not a person with a different sexuality. Not a weird dork or a goofy klutz. Just his mate; his best friend. And then there’s “Call It Like It Is” Amber – emo, goth Amber who shows us just how wonderful Dawson, Benji and Darian (Benji’s girlfriend) are. I mean, these kids don’t care if you’re into The Clash or Celine Dion; they’ll accept you any way you are. Are you getting the vibe here? Yup, it’s sweet.

Anyways, as always, Amy’s gentle words play at your heartstrings as you read about their plight. There's instalove that turns into a long distance relationship, with a bastard character thrown in to mess things up.

I guess for me it was hard to understand why Dawson was so enamoured by Jared. I could see that he was very attracted to him but what made him decide that this was the guy he was going to give his V-card to? Hang on, there were great things about Jared – clearly there were, but… but… I dunno. I wasn’t feeling it. On the other hand, I could genuinely see why Jared was drawn to Dawson’s fun, quirky, thoughtful, caring character.

Jared’s hands on either side of Dawson’s face didn’t calm him down. ”You’re beautiful,” Jared said. ”Like dance. That perfect moment when it’s movement and music and body – that’s you. I’ll never let go of that. I swear.”

If you’re an Amy Lane fan, you’ll probably really love this. It’s sweet and fun. There’s a dash of bad guy action and a ton of angst.
Profile Image for Jewel.
1,935 reviews279 followers
June 16, 2015
Behind the Curtain was a very enjoyable story! The style felt a little different, there wasn't a ton of angst, and it wasn't a rom-com, so that sets it apart from the other Amy Lane books I've read. Steam level is overall light with some hand jobs, a couple blowjobs and one full on sex scene. After that, all the sex happens off page (sad face).

As far as the characters go, I loved Dawson. He was so freaking adorable in his clumsiness and when he decides he wants something, there is no stopping him. Jared has a hard icy outer shell because he's pretty much used to people screwing him over, but Dawson chips away at that ice and the results are a pretty likable Jared.

Jared has been slowly killing himself with dance since he was a kid. He loves it and can't imagine his life without it, but it is hell on the body. He's estranged from his family and doesn't have any friends he can really depend on. Pretty much everyone has taken advantage of him or screwed him over in some way. Then he meets Dawson, who is so genuine and open and comes with a family of friends that is pretty spectacular and very dependable and welcoming.

Dawson and Jared do the long distance thing and they both want more and so they plan. Life (or maybe it was just Jared's douche-bag manager Dolph (even the name says "douche-bag")) conspires to keep them apart, but these are two very determined young men and they want to be together.

I enjoyed watching Dawson grow from being a twenty year old virgin who didn't know his worth to a much more self assured man in love and determined to do what it takes to make it work and also Jared, who really didn't have much self worth before Dawson, became more in tune with himself and also realize that he does have people he can depend on and he is more than just a performer.

I enjoyed the journey of these two young men and can recommend it.
Profile Image for Julia.
408 reviews10 followers
January 13, 2014
I look forward to Amy Lane full length books. I devour them like chocolate. This one has all the wonderful attributes of her others...well developed characters that are deeper (and more messed up) than they seem, drama, angst, tension, uncertainty, and, oh yeah, a really loud bottom. If you like Amy's books, you'll like this one as well.

More and more, I've noticed authors including characters with disabilities. As a mother of a child with multiple disabilities, I love this, even if it's hard to read sometimes because it isn't just a story to me. I'm so appreciative of anyone who sees beyond the disability into their unique beauty. And Amy got the moment just right. Thank you.

Profile Image for Silkeeeeeereads.
1,449 reviews95 followers
January 16, 2014
When Amy Lane is on a roll, you know you've been given a gift. First, I needed this today. I needed to fall in love and get sad and cry and have hope, then feel relief. That's what Amy Lane did for me today. Her characters - I don't know how to explain it but there's always something recognizable in her characters. You know them, you understand their pain and they become your family. They are real. Whether there are parts of their personalities or struggles that you identify with or if you recognize the characters as someone you know. They can be weird as hell and yet so familiar. I loved this book. It was emotional and then happiness.  It made me want to be a part of this dysfunctional family. Highly Recommended!  
Profile Image for Irina.
409 reviews68 followers
February 3, 2015
Audible

DNF @55%

I feel bad for saying this, but I was bored out of my mind. I'm sure other readers would enjoy this story, but it didn't work for me. Please note that my rating shows my own opinion and not the quality of the book. It is loved by many after all, and I'm in a minority here. However, the narrator was really nice and I confess that I pushed as far as I did just because he was a very pleasant company. Extra star is for Hugh Bradley.

***2 stars***


Profile Image for Heller.
973 reviews118 followers
January 12, 2014
I found this story a bit distancing, tbh. Not sure if it was the subject matter or the characters. It was an enjoyable read but I didn't really engage as much as I would have hoped.

Dawson is very much a behind the scenes kind of guy and Jared is all about the spotlight. They're the quintessential opposites attract and that really worked for me. I'm not sure why the story as a whole left me feeling a bit flat. The first part of the story really strongly focused on Dawson's job but that seemed to peter out as the drama surrounding Jared was amped up. I ended up caring for the characters and their story but in a very removed way but a decent read.
Profile Image for namericanwordcat.
2,440 reviews439 followers
May 28, 2017
3.5 Stars!

I really enjoyed this book. Dawson is a lovely main character. He is so himself and asks for what he wants and needs. His circle of friends is great.

I love the community college setting and the tech side of theater. The issues of virginity and distance relationships are nicely explored here.

Jared is a complex hero and I do wish we had gotten more time in his head. I like him and feel for his pain. The last section books hurts a bit because of the cruelty of others but we come out okay.

We get two secondary romance here. Woo hoo!

A lot more epilogue would enrich. Amber needs her own book, Just saying.
Profile Image for Christina Marie.
150 reviews101 followers
August 9, 2016
”I’m terrified I’ll never fly again. I’ll be trapped flat on the ground like a rock. Like I’m already dead. That’s dance. I need it to breath.” (Location 2232)

 photo Flying_zpsa97dec70.jpg

I should start by saying that I’m always wooed by Amy Lane’s sentences. It doesn’t matter where on the emotional spectrum they fall, I find myself making a note (at least twice a book) about how in-sentence-love I’ve fallen. They’re not overly flowery, they’re free of distraction, and I don’t need to frequently consult my dictionary. They’re graceful, and simple, and I’m always amazed at how much (meaning, emotion, laughter, pain, you fucking name it) they convey. They just make me feel damn it.

Oh, the emotions. This was equal parts hilarious, sweet, sad, and infuriating.

There are so many things to love about Behind the Curtain, so many lovely sentence morsels to fawn over, and so many exceptional characters.

I really enjoyed the characters in this. I think, even more than usual. Which is saying a lot, because I’m a total tart for character development. Dawson is one of my all time favorite characters. He just made me laugh so much. I loved being in his head, and I loved his word-spaz-vomits. They were epically amazing. He is just a loveable ball of spaz who makes this book adorkably hilarious. And then there is Jared. That prickly, lonely, beautiful man is somehow just as loveable. Their dynamic in the beginning is perfect. The first time they meet is one of the best scenes in the book, so funny, and I know I’ll remember it for a long time.

Here’s the most important thing about Dawson and Jared. They are gloriously free of info dumps. So that means that over the course of the book, as they fall to pieces, I learned more about them. I learned that they are way more than that amusing first impression. This was particularly important in regards to Jared. He has so many levels, and by the halfway point he was so not what I expected (but it still made sense). I just love that about this book, about Amy Lane’s writing in general. It’s tangible, poignant, sometimes gritty, and it usually ends up being really sweet somehow.

These are perfectly imperfect characters, and they make the book. They’re sticky characters who will stick with you for a long time. Like sticky things ought to do.

Behind the Curtain was an incredible read. I found it superbly entertaining. It made me laugh, it made me weepy, and it flew straight to the top of my re-reads pile. I most definitely recommend.

4.5 Stars

description

More reviews at The Morning After Romance
Profile Image for Eva.
363 reviews178 followers
May 16, 2014
Angsty, angsty, angsty...

Fascinating dancers



Beauty



Passion



Art





So this was about sweet, adorable, klutzy Dawson and dry, stoic, and handsome Jared. The book was bit slow for me and I had some trouble getting into Dawson and Jared as a couple. I had trouble connecting with them and their conversations seemed a bit repetitive at times.

Despite that this book has many lovely moments. The ending was really nice and the character of Dawson's dad was quite fantastic.

This was my second book by Amy Lane. I absolutely loved The Locker Room and will definitely read moe of her books.

Sweet BR with my ladies here.

Profile Image for ☆ Todd.
1,441 reviews1,584 followers
March 25, 2014
Okay, it’s Amy Lane. Amy Freaking Lane, so of course I kinda sorta automatically had to love it.

Watching Dawson crack Jared's icy shell with his utterly adorable 'dumbassery' (it's in Urban Dictionary, I checked, so shhhh) was so much fun. Big, gruff asshole turns to goo 101 and it was awesome.

Then when Dawson stopped being an insecure dish mop and grew up, you just knew somehow that big, gruff asshole was going to roll over any time that Dawson asked for a big ole' belly scratch. Purr, scritch. Yep. That. Which again was pretty awesome, since he only fought it a teeny little bit and didn't get all Neanderthal with a club about it. (*cough* - closet sub - hehe)

The only part that sort of frustrated me was the alleged Dolph-napping. I would have sooooo found a way for *someone* to make a call for me. But enough about that.

It was a really good read and I highly recommend it. Rock on, Amy.

★★★★★
Profile Image for Kenny Danewitz raveh.
621 reviews34 followers
July 16, 2021
Not as good as I hoped.
First, I found the writing very confusing and went back several times re reading scenes.
This only happens to me in Fantasy books when the world is new and confusing (even that is rare)
Both characters started as one thing but changed to a complete opposite in just a heart beat.
Dawson was a happy, funny, good nature quirky guy for about 20 pages and then turned into a scolding mother Han and Jared was this sexy, aloof god who turned into Dawson’s kid.
I also don’t like insta love and this felt like it took 2 seconds to happen.
I did love the camaraderie in this, the loyalty and love everybody shared.
Profile Image for NancyM.
147 reviews
August 14, 2016
Started out light hearted then went emotional towards the end.

There were a few things that made me question things. At the beginning I think I read some sentences that went nowhere and made no sense. They were just randomly stuck in there. It could be that my mind wasn't really focused on the writing, so it might just have been me. The other thing were the names 'Dawson' and 'Darian.' I kept getting confused as to which was which. It doesn't help that Darian sounds like a male name to me either.
Profile Image for Hemmel M..
803 reviews53 followers
April 17, 2023
There was nothing wrong with this audiobook. All characters were nice, even the immature Dawson amused me, and the only trouble in the relationship was Jared always leaving and risking injury. And that was not enough. You can't write hundreds of pages just letting the question hang out there, without tweaking the tension. The narration was so good it kept me listening.

Follow my reviews at http://HemmelM.blogspot.com
Profile Image for Barb ~rede-2-read~.
3,742 reviews113 followers
January 14, 2014
Take a peek “behind the curtain” at a small community college theater in northern California and you’ll meet Dawson, 20 year old stage manager/special effects tech. In front of the curtain is Jared, 26 year old star ballet performer. If you stay for a longer look, you’ll get to know these men intimately, and you’ll have the rare chance to meet the man behind the aloof diva mask which Jared wears so well.

Jared Emory is at the height of his career in LA, when he comes to this community college theater for a three day performance. Too busy behind the scenes to even meet the famous diva who has starred in the production for the past few days, Dawson Barnes is the dictionary definition of awkward: tall and slender with sharp features and gangly arms and legs, he lacks grace and coordination and manages to bump into, knock over, or fall off of something every day. If it wasn’t for his best friend, Benji, who has saved him from many near disasters, God only knows how much trouble he would get into. But Dawson is smart, and he knows and loves everything that goes on behind the curtain, and when he’s working the lights and sound effects, he’s living his dream and he’s damn good at it.

The two meet when Dawson falls from a catwalk above the stage on which Jared is standing after the last show. Though it’s a unique way to meet such a gorgeous man, Dawson is impressed that the imperious Jared simply conveys his thoughts about the fall with a look. Surprisingly, Jared then asks Dawson if he would be willing to do him a favor— he needs help with a class he’s teaching the next day. Dawson’s heart melts when he finds out the class is held for disabled children, primarily those with Down Syndrome and that Jared holds these classes everywhere he travels.

Dawson gets help from Benji and Benji’s girlfriend Darien, and the class is a huge success. Afterward, realizing that Jared would be going back to a lonely hotel room, Dawson invites him over to his apartment for movie night with Benji and Darien. He suspects that, although Jared is usually a loner, he really wants and needs companionship. After the movie marathon, Dawson invites Jared to sleep in his room but bluntly tells Jared that he’s a virgin and that he’s not willing to give that up for a one night stand. Jared respects Dawson’s choices and, before leaving the area the next day, makes plans to return, telling Dawson that when they get together it won’t be for just one night.

Over the next few weeks, their relationship is limited to phone calls, texting and Skyping but Jared keeps his promise and returns for a weekend with Dawson before taking off again, resuming their long distance relationship. Dawson is excitedly looking forward to the following visit, but when Jared arrives, he’s sporting a fever of 103 and apparently has been sick for days. Confined to bed until he begins to feel better, Dawson gets a week with him and while caring for him at the peak of his illness, Dawson is struck by the fact that this wonderful man chose to come to him when he needed someone to care.

This trip not only further strengthens the relationship between the men it also gives us more background information about each. They take the time to talk about commitment and their future career plans, and Jared gets to meet Dawson’s dad for the first time. There’s a brief mention of Xander and Chris from The Locker Room when they’re discussing basketball. Jared later reveals to Dawson that he always admired Xander because he always seemed so alone and then he gave up everything, including his career, so that he wouldn’t be alone.

It’s also during this visit that Dawson finally gets to have sex with Jared. We’re treated to Dawson’s totally embarrassing and mortifying moment when he stumbles out of his room the morning after and his roommates inform him that he was loud, very loud, so loud that the noise “may have set off church bells”.

With Christmas coming, Jared plans another visit, but the hand of fate intervenes and a catastrophe makes Dawson realize that love is more than mere words. He needs to demonstrate the strength of his love as he steps up to the task of helping Jared during a time when Jared has been deliberately isolated from him by his agent, Dolph. I really appreciated seeing the depth of support Dawson had from his father who was a terrific secondary character, and from Benji, Darien, and his other roommate and co-worker, Amber. By this time, all considered Jared a part of their extended family. Though Jared didn’t realize how much he was loved by this family of friends, Dawson did, and he did everything in his power to bring the strength that comes from that kind to love to Jared to help him fight to get back to them.

Amy Lane is an extraordinary and amazing Master Storyteller. She wields her trademark “angst and pain” whip well in this drama as we are carried up and down an emotional roller coaster interspersed with plenty of humor as real life affects these guys. I highly recommend this one to all readers of M/M romance, and if you are already familiar with this author’s work, don’t hesitate for a second. Get it now!

Note: This book was provided to me by the publisher through Hearts on Fire Reviews in exchange for an impartial review.

Profile Image for Kirsten.
1,903 reviews90 followers
August 26, 2022
Bit of a rough start.
Chaotic, passionate, young.
He lives a charmed life.
Profile Image for Plainbrownwrapper.
946 reviews73 followers
January 19, 2014
When reading Amy Lane, it's good to remember that she is NOT all about realism. She is not a documentarian, and has never tried to be one so far as I know. Instead, she explores, plumbs, exploits, manipulates, exaggerates, reshapes, recombines, and forces into our faces the vast and varied soup of human emotions that we are only half-aware of in our everyday lives. Think of her as an expressionist painter, creating her worlds in bold, vivid strokes.

As long as you feel comfortable with that contrast -- she is a Van Gogh, not an Ansel Adams -- then you should do pretty well with her stories.

Behind the Curtain is fairly typical Lane. Every character is oh-so-special -- especially awkward, especially loyal, especially cold, especially damaged, or whatever. Nobody is "normal" or "just plain folks". Amy is very good at making these extreme characters engaging and likable (or hateable in the case of villains), and in this story she combines several of them into an ad hoc family of choice.

And the ultimate purpose of this family, of course, is to save Jared. Who, of course -- again typically Lane -- doesn't believe that he deserves to be saved, or that anyone would want to save him.

This book isn't nearly as wrenching as, say, Chase in Shadow -- but it also isn't as light and fluffy as something like The Winter Courtship Rituals of Fur-Bearing Critters. I wanted to see much more of Jared's life -- but part of the point of the story was that we did NOT get to see "behind his curtain" except in snips and flashes. He was intentionally a semi-cipher, and we were forced to accept -- as Dawson was -- that we were going to let him into our own lives without knowing everything about his, even though we'd keep fighting to learn more about him all along the way.

In that vein, it was interesting that the story was NOT actually wrapped up in a nice neat bow. The story is still unfolding, the curtain is still slowly drawing back, and there's still a lot to learn about what's going on backstage.

And thus endeth my ramble for the day. ;-)
Profile Image for Amy Cousins.
Author 46 books623 followers
January 17, 2014
Amy Lane is pretty much a no brainer for me. I almost always enjoy her books and have, with some stories, reread them over and over again, even though I often end up crying my eyes out (ETHAN IN GOLD and THE LOCKER ROOM, I'm looking at you.)

This latest book (HOW CAN SHE WRITE SO FAST?! I THINK AMY LANE IS A SEKRIT ROBOTIC WRITING MACHINE MADE FROM ANGST AND DUCT TAPE) was a love fest with my favorite kind of young people: the arty/funky, incestuously close in friendship, young people in college. I loved that this book took place at a small school in the ass end of nowhere and that the MC who is in school there is totally open about knowing he's a small town boy. But one with enough talent to go places if he wants to... That he gives equal consideration to becoming a big name in his field and to staying in the small town to teach other kids the magic he works backstage is heartwarming.

The only thing that made this book less than a five star Amy Lane for me was that I really wanted more of Jared's story. The pieces that we get are so intense and full of drama, that I just wished there was more of him in the book.

But even without that, it's still a lovely story about the kind of people I hope my kid ends up connecting with when he goes off to college. In a decade. Oy.
Profile Image for Vivian.
2,919 reviews483 followers
June 23, 2014
Dorky, self-deprecating heart of gold meets his broken and reconstructed Ice Prince. Let the thaw begin!

Considering how all over the map the reviews and ratings were for this one, I'm surprised that it didn't annoy me more than it did. Often, I find Lane's book to be way too heavy on the angst with one or both characters who really don't seem like they should be left in their own care.

So, was there trauma? Oh yes. Jared is a walking advertisement for how I tried really hard and life screwed me. BUT...it didn't bother me as much because the primary focus wasn't on the crapola rather Dawson and the world he spins.

Dawson ( Mary Sue) is a great guy. Adorably flawed and so big-hearted that that pair of wings is about to sprout out of his back at any moment. Goofy and an ambassador of goodwill to mankind, Dawson rallies his small world to create the the family you deserve even if you weren't blessed with it. This is a familiar theme in Lane's stories and one I agree with.

Favorite quotes:
But I have to tell you these things, and I think, ‘Oh God. I am the worst thing to happen to Dawson’s life, and I suck.' --Jared

In fact, the world had never really let Dawson down. Maybe it was Dawson’s job to keep the faith, even when Jared couldn’t.

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