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460 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 1, 2014
“I’m much smarter than most people.“
“What pretty person achieved anything of merit anyway?”
“And for pretty girls at school, their moment would soon be over. They were peaking at their happiness levels much too early. Which is why Bree stayed ugly–to delay the peakage to a usefulage. Another reason why Bree was much smarter than most people.“
“He was the only person who shared her intellect levels and decide to do something with their privilege instead of resting on the laurels of wealth.”
And all these in just the first chapter. I can’t. Oh god.
Trauma. It doesn't eke itself out over time. It doesn't split itself manageably into bite-sized chunks and distribute itself equally throughout your life.
Trauma is all or nothing. A tsunami wave of destruction.
A tornado of unimaginable awfulness that whooshes into your life - just for one key moment - and wreaks such havoc that, in just an instant, your whole world will never be the same again.
She didn't believe there were many great life lessons out there for her still to learn. But perhaps this was one of them. That, by letting people in, even seemingly shallow nasty people like Jassmine, you learn something. Something you can only get through intimacy.
Understand what? That sometimes you feel like a boiling kettle, getting hotter and hotter, and the only way to let it all out is to do this- like its erupting steam all over the place? Or that sometimes, when you're really low, it's just nice to feel...something, any kind of physical sensation... and pain is the sensation with the most powerful pull? or that, maybe, it's a way of proving you're alive. I must be, there's blood coming out of me, this proves I exist. or, look, I've got an entire tuft of hair filling my fist- I must be here, I must be real, I can prove it.
