Breathe: A Short Story

by Daniel Wallock

A short story about a young man's seven life-threatening heart conditions.

Genres: Short Stories

8 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 24, 2014

About the author

Daniel Wallock is a college student living in New York and the author of three books, which have been downloaded over 20,000 times across 25 countries. His poetry and prose have appeared in 20 publications including Burningword, Wild Quarterly, ExFic, The Vending Machine Press, Agave Magazine, VAYAVYA Poetry, Whistling Shade Journal, and The Bolt Magazine. Daniel has received numerous writing awards including 1st place in San Jose State University’s Nonfiction Short Story Contest. In addition to pursing a literary career Daniel spends time speaking for nonprofit organizations, doing marketing and media consulting, and designing websites.

Reviews

[Liza · Rating 2 out of 5]

To the point.

It was a very short story with the potential to be expanded into a great novel. This at it story reads like a well thought out rough draft. I would like to see the rest of it if he decides to make this into a novel.

[K.Q. · Rating 1 out of 5]

As you probably have all heard, I am a chronically ill little letter of the alphabet. I was born with (Among other things) Tetralogy of Fallot, which basically means there was a hole in two of the chambers in my heart and the oxidized blood with mixing with the un-oxidized blood. When I was 14 months old, I had several heart surgeries to correct it.

When I heard about Daniel Wallock's goal to give away 100,000 copies of his e-books, out of both a sense of congenital camaraderie and "yay, free books!" I hunted them down.

I read Breathe because it was short. Unfortunately it's not very good. The writing is clunky, and the story is predictable. I knew it was autobiographical but by the end of the first sentence I thought to myself "The last line is going to be And I was that boy... isn't it?"

The wording is repetitious and there's no empathy because everything is glossed over.

Everyone's afraid for him because he's slow and sickly but...they don't realize he's skipping school? Do they not know where he is?

When he wakes from surgery he's covered in blood. That's...not usually how that works. You'd think the doctors would try to practice a little more decorum, especially for a terrified 13 year old boy.

Then his parents sent him away. Where?

I know I sound harsh, and I'm sorry. I'm glad Daniel Wallock made it and is following his dream and I sincerely wish him all the best. I really, really do. But this is how I feel.

However, I downloaded all of his books and I will likely read all of them, with hope that they get better. From what little I skimmed of Right-Hearted Finding What's Right With a Wrong-Sided Heart, they do.

[Amie's Book Reviews · Rating 3 out of 5]

BREATHE

Author: Daniel Wallock

Published: 2014

Genre: Non Fiction, Autobiography

Length: 8 pages

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars ⭐⭐⭐

* I downloaded this book free from www.amazon.ca

This is an extremely short non-fiction story about the author's life.

Although I feel genuine compassion for Daniel's life challenges I am rating the story, not the emotion behind it.

I think that if this was longer and a bit more detailed I would have given it a higher rating. As it stands it is hard to feel much since the length of the story does not give the reader time to genuinely connect with the author and his plight.

The fact that the author is only 18 years old probably accounts for whatever shortcomings the story has. But I do believe he has potential. Also, his life story is probably fascinating and if turned into a novel length narrative would grip the reader's attention.

To learn more about this young author and to discover more of his published works visit www.danielwallock.com

I rate this as 3 out of 5 stars. ⭐⭐⭐

To read more of my reviews visit http://amiesbookreviews.wordpress.com

Follow me on Twitter @Amieroger

[Robert · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one of the shortest stories I have read in a long time. I identified with the author, because I have a heart condition that I was born with as well. I also had to go through numerous procedures to help me stay healthy. There was also something about this story that resonated with me because I know what it is like to hate the fact that you're not as healthy as others and to be looked down on by others in school because you cannot run as fast, or really play sports. The truth is that it helped make me who I am today, and I got the sense from this story that it did the same for Daniel. Thank you, Daniel for sharing your story.

[Pennie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very talented young author "in my book" so to speak. Breath is a very short story of true life about a boys struggle for survival inside hospital walls and then being bullied by his peers out in the world. His hardships follow a cycle of depression then at long last, a realization of having the gift of a second chance on life which makes him a stronger and happier person. It's to the point and very heart felt. The eBook is done in the form of prose. I read all his books and support him all the way throughout his journey to help others.

[Leslie Fisher · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked this book/short work of non-fiction. It definitely seemed like more details could have been given and the story could have been expanded. The writing style seemed a little amateurish, but at least there weren't a lot of mistakes like I've seen in a lot of the other short pieces that I've purchased. I would definitely be interested in reading a fully flushed-out memoir about Daniel Wallock, but this work was at least interesting and succeeded in getting me to want to know more about him.

[Amie]

I don't know if it's fair to give it a rating because it was so short. It reads like a prologue to a memoir that has potential to be great. I would be interested to read a full story about Daniel's life and struggles.

[Chelsea Lynn Fugate · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great

This was a great read. Makes you open your eyes regardless what is going on in your life. very interesting.

[Cassie_Reads_Books · Rating 2 out of 5]

Such a short story. I wish there were more details. This outline of a book has a lot of potential.

[Lynn McClelland · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not really a book. More like a brief Intro or Bio.