My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift

by Harold Phifer

After the passing of Hal's evil aunt, the pastor attempts to ease her past the Pearlie Gates regardless of her past misdeeds. Hal's attitude is totally different than the reverend. But the pastor needs Hal's full support in order to pull off his caper.”
Will she get routed to heaven or hell?

Genres: Book Club, Drama, Contemporary, Novels

139 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 3, 2025

Reviews

[Phyllicia Mays · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't imagine having to go take care of the arrangements of someone that treated me so poorly. But the true gift she left you is resiliance. I highly reccommend this book. Definitely keeping it as part of my personal library to read again in the future.

[Lindsey Kimball · Rating 5 out of 5]

My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift is a gripping and honest read that keeps you hooked from start to finish. Hal shares his complicated relationship with Aunt Kathy—the pain she caused, the struggles he faced, and the unexpected lessons she left behind. With humor and insight, he shows how even the hardest experiences can lead to growth and healing.

This book is a powerful reminder that making peace with the past isn’t always easy, but it’s possible. Hal’s storytelling is real, relatable, and full of heart. I highly recommend it and can’t wait to see what he writes next!

[Soochi Sandhiya · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are looking for a perfect light-hearted comedy with a twist of some deep, undeniable facts of life, then "My aunt, My Bully and Her Final Gift" by Harold Phifer will be your ideal pick. Although the title suggested what I can expect as the central plot for the read, it is highly entertaining as it gives a new range of storytelling.
Harold Phifer writes straightforwardly and honestly. His storytelling is raw and emotional and keeps the reader engaged. He does not shy away from complex topics, making the book powerful and eye-opening. The characters are well-written and can instantly draw a connection with the readers. For example, the character of Aunt Kathy is a complex and profoundly impactful figure in Harold Phifer's life. She was not the nurturing presence one might expect from an aunt; instead, she was harsh, controlling, and a source of emotional and physical pain for Harold during his childhood. Her bullying left lasting scars, shaping his experiences and struggles. However, despite the torment she caused, her "final gift" brought an unexpected twist, leading Harold to reflect on their relationship in a new light. Aunt Kathy represents both the hardships of his past and the ironic lessons that life can bring. This moving memoir touches on resilience, pain, and self-discovery, describing Hal's emotions for her aunt, Kathy. Many instances involving life's struggles in the story are heartbreaking but inspiring, showing that no matter how tough life gets, there is always a way forward.

[Rajnish Kumar · Rating 5 out of 5]

My latest read, "My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift" by Harold Phifer, is a powerful narrative set in an emotional background. It will potentially take you deep into the complexities of family scenarios and the tabooed topic of undeniable bullying. The story pictures Hal and his aunt's relentless bullying, which might seem utterly despicable at times, but the author has made sure to keep you on your tips with some compelling twists. The readers would further explore the harsh realities of problematic homes marked by uninvolved parents. The descriptive and authentic storytelling that engraves tough topics makes the book a must-read for anyone who values genuine narratives. The author has done a commendable job of sprinkling humour despite all the chaos and drama. The storyline aptly blends the themes of redemption, personal growth, relationship dynamics and forgiveness with robust storytelling.
This read was an emotional whirlwind, with raw and relatable instances centred on light and humorous backgrounds. I recommend! Pick your read and enjoy it!

[Carol · Rating 4 out of 5]

My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift by Harold Phifer belongs in the humor genre. A man is called by his pastor to prepare a memorial for his Aunt Kathy. Aunt Kathy has always been a horrible person, full of backhanded compliments and pure venom. The pastor wants him to give a eulogy for the person that he was relieved to see pass away. It is very funny. The only negative thing is that this book is in miniature print. I can only read a few pages and then give up. My eyes cross, and are in pain while reading it. I am using a magnifying glass some of the time but that implement is heavy to hold.

I will read more from Harold Phifer, if I am able to find his books in a comfortable print size.

[Andre(Read-A-Lot) · Rating 3 out of 5]

What kind of zany foolishness is this? What the actual fcuk? I’m not even entirely sure this qualifies as a novel. More like an extended humorous exploration of an Aunt that bullies the poor little protagonist as she is propelled throughout this story by her holy-roller Christian tendencies. To be fair, this shyt is crazy hilarious and funny in its presentation even. But to call it a novel, that’s a serious stretch.

[Antony Wairiuko · Rating 5 out of 5]

Author Hal Goes into Creativity Overdrive

My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift is a 19-section, 139-page book by Harold Phifer. The February 2025 memoir is a heartwarming dedication to a beloved late nephew and a pleasing commemoration of his outspoken and unpredictable maternal Aunt Kathy; despite triggering personality clashes throughout her long life, the illogical aunt’s well-attended memorial service brings together the very people at the receiving end of her life-changing antics and who nevertheless celebrate a not-so-truthful life well-lived.

In a first-person narrative, the author recounts a heartbreaking phone call that interrupts his routine job—fighting insurgents—in Afghanistan. The caller, Pastor Keith, prompts the hesitant and cautious Hal to return to his hometown, Colombus, Mississippi, to help organize—alongside the indebted pastor who signed an agreement and pledged a “hook-up at the Pearly Gates”— Sister Kathy’s memorial service. 

Thus, Hal finds himself at the forefront of organizing the service of a thorn in the flesh—a difficult situation considering the “sick, twisted…relationship…had to endure”, forcing him to “break away from her webbing…to do things that stimulated me.” But memorializing on a busy weekday? Worse still, he doesn’t know the whereabouts of his unaware brothers who seemingly want nothing to do with each other and with the ceremony, including his elder brother who “was the Golden child and the apple of Aunt Kathy’s heart.”

So, how does Hal and Keith pull it off? Is blood always thicker than water, or will it be every man for himself? You should read this book to know what, and how it, happens. The watershed moment—also the clue to the “final gift”—is during the ensuing brotherly fight and their weird undressing at the cemetery: where he “removed the venom from my heart…ran bare-chested…like my brothers…it was time to build new bridges…sometimes death finds love in unknown places…renewed…the biggest and best gift of them all.”

Expect: bittersweet memories, mischiefs, love-hate relationships, negativities, broken home, individualism, stoicism, rebellious children, moral support and lack thereof, sibling rivalries, preferential treatment, sugarcoating, emotional outbursts, childhood injustices, indoctrination, and hypocrisy.

Literary devices include: brothers “as irresponsible as stray cats”; “tall legs to stand on”; “she outlived the Ice Age”; “I became the parrot in the store”; tales, lies, and pies; “orchard of mixed fruits flew over my head”; objects “were diverted my way”; “white on rice”; “seared right through my deceptions”; “two fools standing next to a lightning rod”; they were always two “lost shoes, or missing socks”; “he nursed the bottle and inhaled the grass”; “infants testing their lungs”; “his shirt wasn’t good enough for a Scarecrow”; 

“needed some rainbows and butterflies to fill my weary head”; “liquid spice and his internal supply was running low and skating on fumes”; rain rinsed Columbus “from stem to stern”; “more Haters than a deck of cards has spades”; whipping “put more knots on my head than bumps on a toad frog”; “treated like a bass boat to a Tsunami”; girls were seen “as fresh fruit on the vine”; “stole fluoride from toothpaste”; my “head was on cloud nine…cloud 19”.

Rich in idioms, proverbs, literary devices, unique word choices, and creative complex words; My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift’s conversational tone will keep you hooked and get you laughing throughout its dark humor-filled pages. 

[Manik and Sayee |favbookshelf · Rating 5 out of 5]

In My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift, Harold Phifer looks back on his turbulent childhood shaped by the harsh and challenging relationship he had with his Aunt Kathy. Aunt Kathy is known for her fiery tongue and iron grip; her death prompts Harold to confront past traumas and his childhood memories. She was strict and mean and mistreated him, leaving lasting scars on him. As he prepares for her funeral, a ceremony no one seems thrilled about, Harold remembers all the ups and downs of growing up under her control. The memories are painful, filled with family chaos and childhood dreams crushed. The Aunt Kathy's passing opens the door to healing and reconnection. This memoir is a powerful tribute to survival, brotherhood, and the strange blessings found in even the darkest relationships.

The beginning itself is really hooking, and the author skillfully integrates his brothers into the narrative, portraying them as both part of the chaos and largely unreliable, which adds to the dysfunctional family dynamic. The introduction of Aunty Kathy is sharp, with vivid lines like, "If anyone told the devil 'You're a Lie,' it was Aunt Kathy." From this line, we get a glimpse of the character and setting the tone for her role. The thing that struck me the most in the book was how real everything felt. The way he describes being overlooked as a child, the constant comparison to his brother Jerry, and the emotional weight of trying to earn affection from someone was heartbreaking and really relatable, too. The writing style is characterized by raw honesty and dark humor, effectively conveying the emotional turmoil of his experiences, like darkly comic moments (e.g., Jerry's disco-ready funeral attire) and heartbreaking scenes (like the stolen Christmas parade letters). When it comes to the characters, Hal (the author) is the emotional anchor of the book. Through him, we experience the challenges and the memories or traumas that happened in childhood. Aunt Kathy is shown as a terrible person and a highly complex character. The brothers, especially Jerry, help add more layers to the story. He stands out not just as a troubled sibling in the beginning but as an active agent of verbal cruelty, often intensifying scenes of discomfort, especially to the sister Alice. Themes of resilience and forgiveness resonate throughout the book. By the end, you might not be sure if you hated Aunt Kathy or pitied her. Overall, the book is deeply emotional and highly recommended.

[Akanksha S · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bullying and abuse in childhood are so common that people have taken them for granted. Most of it happens by someone who is either a family member or close to family members. This leaves a deep scar on the kid's soul, and he struggles his whole life to get rid of it.

But what happens when the person who hurt you the most is also the one who raised you? What if the only “parent” figure in your life was both your protector and your tormentor? Harold Phifer's book tells his story about growing up with a tough aunt who often bullied him. The book digs into how that kind of childhood hurt sticks with you, even when you get older.

Hal, the narrator, takes you through his rough childhood in 1960s Columbus, Mississippi, under the thumb of his domineering Aunt Kathy. She’s a complex character—devout Christian, church pillar, but a bully who torments Hal, his schizophrenic mom, and his wayward brothers, Jerry and Tommy. He says at one point, “I saw her as the monster under my bed and the ghost in my closet… yet somehow, I still longed for her approval.” This shows how he felt about his Aunt Mary Lee and also shows his own character's complexity. The person who torments us, we go to the same person for approval. This is a sad reality of our world. Bad stuff happens to people all the time. What happens after the bad stuff is important. The author asks a powerful question: "When the hurting stops, what do we do with the silence left behind?" How do we get over it? What's the impact of it?

Harold's storytelling feels like a friend spilling their truth. He mixes pain with dark humor, making you laugh at chaotic moments. For example, he says his aunt could change the mood of a room with just one look. You can picture it.

This book opened some of my wounds from the past. It shows that people can grow from even the most painful experiences, and forgiveness is the only solution to end suffering. He says that forgiving her helped him find missing parts of himself. Though healing will take time, we have to make peace with the painful past. Anyone who’s wrestled with family baggage or found peace in unlikely places can go for the book.

[Joyce Licorish · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a 50-year-old Black woman who has lived through the complexities of family dynamics, My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift by Hal hit me in a place I didn’t expect. We all have that one relative—the one whose presence feels more like a storm cloud than a source of warmth. For Hal, that person was his Aunt Kathy. Her domineering and often cruel ways shaped his experiences, leaving wounds that, even in adulthood, still ached. Yet, in an ironic twist of fate, her passing gave him something unexpected: a path toward healing, humor, and even grace.

What I loved most about this book was Hal’s raw honesty. He doesn’t sugarcoat the pain or pretend it didn’t leave its mark. Instead, he invites us into his world, where he sifts through the past with a mix of humor and reflection that makes his story not just relatable but deeply human. I saw pieces of my own life in his words—the complicated love, the unspoken resentment, and the surprising lessons that come from even the most difficult relationships.

Harold’s writing is engaging, balancing the weight of his experiences with moments of levity that remind us of life’s contradictions. His ability to find humor in pain is a testament to resilience, something so many of us understand. He shows us that healing doesn’t always come wrapped in forgiveness tied with a bow—it sometimes comes in the form of understanding, of letting go, of learning to laugh even when the memories still sting.

This book is for anyone who has ever struggled to make peace with a difficult family member, for those who have carried childhood wounds into adulthood, and for those seeking a reminder that sometimes, even the most painful relationships can leave behind an unexpected gift. My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift is a powerful, reflective, and at times, surprisingly funny read that stays with you long after the last page.

[Sebastian Calderon · Rating 5 out of 5]

This felt like reading I’m Glad My Mom Died, another memoir that I love, but with a more relatable message, as most of us aren’t child stars of big-name shows. In My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift, Harold Phifer gives us something just as raw and emotionally complex, but grounded in the everyday absurdities and wounds that come from growing up in a fractured family.

Through humor, heartbreak, and unexpected tenderness, Phifer dives into a complicated relationship with his aunt—a woman who caused him pain, yet somehow still managed to shape him in meaningful ways. It’s this contradiction that powers the memoir: how someone so difficult can leave behind a gift that looks a lot like peace.

What starts as a reluctant trip home for a funeral turns into a deeply introspective journey. Phifer uses short, reflective vignettes to revisit his past, blending memories of family dysfunction with biting wit and a surprising spiritual undercurrent. Whether he's describing a chaotic memorial service held on a Monday or reliving moments of painful favoritism, the writing never loses its emotional depth.

The book manages to be both sharply funny and quietly devastating, showing how unresolved childhood dynamics can resurface even in adulthood—and how grief can lead us somewhere unexpectedly healing.

Is blood really thicker than water?

Well, for anyone who’s had to make peace with a family member who never made things easy, this book offers not only catharsis, but also an exploration on the age-old adage, to determine whether it is indeed like this, or not.

While healing doesn’t always start with an “I’m sorry” from those who hurt us, it can still arrive in other, serendipitous ways.

[Ray · Rating 5 out of 5]

Harold Phifer's My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift is quite an interesting and different read. As the title suggests, it centres around an aunt who was, in many ways, a bully. After her passing, the narrator is faced with the unexpected and difficult task of writing her eulogy—but how do you honour someone who brought more pain than peace?

What makes this book compelling is its ability to blend harsh truths with humour. While the topic is serious—exploring a strained and emotionally loaded family relationship—the author manages to keep the tone from becoming too heavy. He shares personal, sometimes uncomfortable stories with brutal honesty, yet finds room to laugh at the chaos and absurdity that shaped his childhood. I find it raw and easy to relate to. Especially since reality is not just black and white.

It’s both a memoir and a reflection. It shows how grief doesn’t always come wrapped in fond memories. It made me think of my own personal relationships and how they aren't all perfect, nor do they all portray happy memories. The "final gift" isn’t necessarily what you expect—it’s about finding clarity, closure, and even growth in the messiest of relationships.

This book doesn’t shy away from uncomfortable emotions, but it also doesn’t wallow in them. It’s heartfelt, sharp, and surprisingly funny. If you enjoy memoirs that tell it like it is—raw, relatable, and a little bit irreverent—this one is worth reading.

[Grady · Rating 5 out of 5]

‘Your Aunt Kathy got called home to Glory last night’ – memories and influences

Mississippi born author Harold Phifer earned his degrees from Mississippi State University and Jackson State University and served as a specialized air traffic controller and as an international contractor in both Iraq and in Afghanistan. He has published three books to date - SLEEPWALKING OUT OF AFGHANISTAN, SURVIVING CHAOS, and now MY BULLY, MY AUNT, AND HER FINAL GIFT.

In a most intriguing manner Phifer details the impact his domineering, negative-focused aunt had on his life. As he states, ‘Besides Mom, Aunt Kathy left a lasting imprint. She was the opposite of all things positive. At the end, it was painfully obvious she deserved a book of her very own.’ In summary, ‘As he plans her memorial—a gathering that no one seems eager to attend—Hal's childhood memories resurface, pulling him back into a world shaped by his aunt's unpredictable rules and twisted philosophies. Blending heartfelt truths with laugh-out-loud moments, Hal weaves a tale of resilience, self-discovery, and ultimately, redemption.’

Fascinating on many levels, this novel//memoir is very strong on many levels – not only as entertainment but also as an insightful examination of the effect of family influences we all encounter, on whatever level! Recommended.

[Cris Nix · Rating 4 out of 5]

A Comedic and Spiritual Account of a Loathsome Relative

This was definitely a comedic read full of spirituality and energy. It is a recreation of real-life experiences according to the author’s introduction before his book. Hal (the author’s name in here) is just going about his usual workday in Afghanistan, when suddenly a phone call from his child and teen-hood pastor, Keith, relays the news that his long-time dreadful relative Aunt Kathy has passed. Pastor Keith wants Hal to be in attendance and to be a witness at his deceased relation’s funeral. And right then from there does Hal chastise his Aunt through his memories of her.
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I found this personal account to be a mixture of the good and the bad. The good is that at the end of the day, Hal learns a valuable lesson from his Aunt’s death and the bad is all the bad blood between them. I am happy though to say that it ends positively and there’s a great Christian lesson, a rainbow, at the end of the storm. I highly recommend this book to churchgoers and to spiritual people who have experienced forgiveness and redemption in their Christian lives. For me, I am just content that the author chooses to move on and to ultimately see the underlying gift underneath his tumultuous relationship with his Aunt Kathy. It’s very much a miracle. Hooray!

[Muhammed · Rating 4 out of 5]

My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift by Harold Phifer is a raw, reflective memoir that dares to explore the complex and often uncomfortable territory of difficult family relationships. Through unfiltered honesty and emotional nuance, Phifer recounts his tangled history with Aunt Kathy—both his tormentor and, ultimately, a catalyst for his personal growth. What makes this book stand out is its refusal to simplify the narrative into categories of villain and victim. Instead, it embraces the messy truths of human connection, showing how even the most painful relationships can leave behind unexpected gifts.

Phifer’s storytelling is both piercing and tender, laced with dark humor and sharp insight. He does not shy away from recounting the hurt or acknowledging the scars, but neither does he wallow in bitterness. Instead, he uses memory as a lens for healing, turning each recollection into a stepping stone toward self-understanding. Readers will find themselves revisiting their own pasts, reconsidering the roles of those who hurt and shaped them.

The narrative feels deeply personal yet universally resonant—especially for anyone who has ever had to reconcile love and pain in the same relationship. What lingers most after turning the last page is not just the emotional weight of Phifer’s story, but the clarity and hope that emerges from it.

[Tima · Rating 5 out of 5]

Harold Phifer's My Bully, My Aunt and Her Final Gift unexpectedly starts in Kabul when Harold receives a phone call that takes him back to his past. There is something subtle yet intense about his writing, especially the way he describes the world around him. His family, particularly his relatives, are portrayed with honesty. His brothers seem to be more of a trouble to his existence than any kind of support. His mother passed away a few years ago, and the memories still linger. But it is Aunt Kathy who stands out. A dominating figure, she has survived every small and big trouble only to stage a comeback each time.

I really liked the humour and wit in the book. The phone call is from a priest inviting Harold to become a junior minister, which adds an unusual layer to the story. Aunt Kathy’s strong religious beliefs and influence tie into all of this.

What I appreciate most is how the book connects two distant places and brings out deep emotional reflections. The storyline, the voice, the way faith, individuality and family come together makes it a beautiful and engaging read. One of the best memoirs I have read in recent times.

[Swati Tanu · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Sometimes death finds love in unknown places."

Some people leave behind love and warmth when they pass. Others leave behind a mess of emotions that no one knows how to untangle. Aunt Kathy? She was definitely the latter. In My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift, Harold Phifer takes us through the complicated, raw, messy, brutally funny, and painfully real process of coming to terms with a family member who shaped his life in ways he never asked for.

This book stands out not just because of its honesty but also because of its humor. Phifer has a way of turning even the darkest moments into something sharp, witty, and impossible to look away from. He doesn’t ask for sympathy, and he doesn’t paint himself as a victim. Instead, he tells his story with brutal truth and a sense of humor that makes you laugh even when you probably shouldn’t.

You might like to check out more similar books here.

[Charles Magesa · Rating 5 out of 5]

An Interesting Tale of A Controversial Aunt

I found My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift by Harold Phifer to be an exciting read. The main character endures bullying throughout his childhood at the hands of a controlling aunt, but this unfair treatment ultimately builds his character. The author excels in character development and world-building.

This story highlights how society and the church can be blind to the wrongdoings of certain individuals while judging others based on their status or position. It was disturbing to see how even the reverend allowed Aunt Kathy to evade accountability for her actions within the church.

I appreciated that, despite the siblings drifting apart, they were finally reunited after their aunt's demise. It was also inspiring to see Hal continually seek to explore life from different perspectives, despite the constant setbacks imposed by his aunt. The part I enjoyed most was the ending and the brothers' reunion.

Overall, I enjoyed reading My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift, and I highly recommend it.

[Arlena · Rating 4 out of 5]

Title: My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift
Author: Harold Phifer
Publisher: BookBaby
Reviewed By: Arlena Dean
Rating: Four
Review:
"My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift" by Harold Phifer

My Insight:

"My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift" enveloped me in an emotional journey that lingered in my thoughts long after the final page was turned. Hal's tumultuous experiences with his seemingly pious yet cruel aunt were both shocking and profoundly eye-opening. It’s astonishing to witness how someone could embody such wickedness beneath the polished facade of righteousness. Despite the oppressive shadow cast by his aunt, Hal's resilience radiates brightly, illuminating his path as he navigates this complex and challenging relationship. This powerful narrative compels us to delve deeper into the stark realities of such situations. It truly prompts a haunting question—could this occur in real life? Absolutely! I wholeheartedly recommend this captivating read to anyone yearning for a thought-provoking and emotionally enriching experience!

[Vincent Rivas]

This is a story about family, growing up, and learning to deal with pain. Hal tells about his Aunt Kathy, who was strict and often mean, but also a real person with her own ways. Reading about his childhood, his brothers, and all the chaos at home felt real, like you were right there with him.

What I really liked is how honest Hal is. He talks about the hurt Aunt Kathy caused, the times he felt small or overlooked, and how he wanted her approval. But he also shows that even hard experiences can teach you something. And in the end, Aunt Kathy gives a “final gift” that makes him see things differently. It’s not about forgetting the pain, it’s about finding a way to grow and heal.

This book mixes serious moments with humor and reflection, so it’s not all heavy. You’ll laugh, feel sad, and think about your own family while reading it. Hal’s story stays with you, and it’s the kind of book that makes you want to tell others about it. If you want a story that’s real, emotional, and sometimes funny, you need to read this book.

[Naiomi Skelton · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first encountered our dear Aunt Kathy when I first read the author's prior book, "Surviving Chaos: How I Found Peace at a Beach Bar". She piqued my attention right away. While our author is the protagonist in our story, he is constantly dealing w ithdealing abuse and manic confusion coming from his Aunt. As an overzealous Christian, Aunt Kathy was a walking oxymoron. Ironically, when she "goes on to Glory" as the pastor aptly puts it, the responsibility of taking care of her final arrangements falls on Hal, her nephew, who has never liked her from the beginning. "Aunt Kathy would be Satan's problem from then to eternity", he states, giving you quite an accurate idea of how he really felt about his mother's sister. I am quite sure that you will enjoy every page of this unique offering from author, Harold Phifer. I know that I look forward to more from him in the near future!

[Regin Skelton · Rating 5 out of 5]

I hate reviews that have spoilers, so I won't spoil this one by telling you the ending or what Aunt Kathy's "final gift" was to Hal. What I will tell you is that this is a book worth reading! Like most of us, I have had the experience of having to go to a funeral for someone that I wasn't particularly fond of, but I couldn't imagine having to take the responsibility of handing everything myself for a person who I really didn't like. Most of the things that Aunt Kathy said and did were deplorable, and I felt for Hal, because his mother was also going through mental instabilities. This man dealt with a lot, even throughout his childhood. Unexpectedly, the dark humor that is sprinkled throughout the book makes it a different type of story that you wouldn't think would come from death and grief. This was a fantastic book that I would definitely recommend to everyone; it is an uncommon look at familial ties and resposibilities and the way death plays a part in our lives.

[Naman Pande · Rating 4 out of 5]

Harold Phifer doesn’t write to impress — he writes to unload. And that’s exactly what makes this book feel so personal, almost like you’re sitting across from him, listening to a story he’s never told out loud before. My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift isn’t just a title — it’s a summary of pain, confusion, and that strange kind of healing that only shows up when you least expect it.

The “bully” here isn’t just one person — it’s a metaphor for all the emotional weight he’s carried since childhood. And the “aunt”? Complicated doesn’t even begin to describe her. But her final gesture becomes something powerful — a kind of unexpected closure that leaves a mark.

What makes this book work is its honesty. No filters, no fluff, just the raw stuff — the kind most people are scared to write. It’s not a perfect story, but that’s the point.

If you’ve ever had to make peace with your past, or you’re still trying to — this one might stay with you longer than you expect.

[Maureen Timerman · Rating 5 out of 5]

As I stated this book I saw the dedication to his nephew, sad.
The author shows a lot of humor as I read about his young life. His life journey took him to Kabul, Afghanistan, fighting insurgents, and Pastor Keith, of Zion Gate Union Baptist, is on the phone. His Aunt has passed away, and he is needed to make arrangements.
I give Hal, a lot of credit, as we journey though this book, and see how life treated him. Talk about child abuse! He appears to be a gifted child, but this aunt seemed to take pleasure in putting him down. Time after time, he just pulls himself up!
This is a 126 page read, with a lot packed into the chapters, including planning the funeral of Aunt Kathy, he sure had to face his past!
I enjoyed this read, and wish I could of helped him, but he persevered and came up as a man whom has succeeded, and moved on!
I received this book through LibraryThing, and was not required to give a positive review.

[Billy Robertson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift was a strong experience. His story about his Aunt Kathy hit me hard. She was mean, bossy, and really tough on him, but he tells it in a way that also makes you see the funny side sometimes. Some parts made me laugh, and some parts made me feel sad.

Hal is very honest about his life. He talks about the times Aunt Kathy was cruel and how he always wanted her approval. I could feel how frustrating it must have been, especially with his brother Jerry getting all the attention. Even with all the pain, something good came out of it in the end when Aunt Kathy passed away. That “final gift” gave Hal a way to look at things differently and find some peace.

This book is about family, struggle, and learning to forgive. It shows that even people who hurt you can leave lessons behind. Hal’s story is real, emotional, and sometimes funny. It stayed with me long after I finished it.

[Joyce Licorish · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Powerful Reflection on Abuse, Family, and Hypocrisy - THIS HIT HOME

THIS BOOK RIGHT HERE SPOKE TO ME! My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift resonated deeply with me. Hal’s story of surviving his Aunt Kathy’s cruelty—especially coming from someone who was supposed to be family—felt all too familiar. She wielded power, not love, and like so many who hide behind faith, she used control instead of kindness.

What struck me most was Hal’s raw honesty about the wounds left by those who claim to be Christians but act without love. I’ve lived that reality, where faith is a mask for manipulation. Yet, through his pain, Hal finds humor, healing, and reflection—something I, too, have had to do. This book is a must-read for anyone who’s ever had to untangle love from abuse and faith from hypocrisy.

[Birdtrovert · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you for the free copy in exchange for an honest review.

3 stars

"She reverse dunked her grandbaby into my bread basket."

This was a very short memoir about a man who grew up with an absolute devil for an aunt. (And a pretty shitty brother too.) I haven't read his other books, so I feel like I only saw part of the picture, but holy crap. I'm glad Aunt Kathy is gone but, unlike the author, I don't feel like the hatred and resentment toward my abuser would go away. People like that, the ones who are just vile to others for no real reason (especially to those who are weaker than them) are some of the worst people ever.

But this memoir had some absolute banger lines. There were some real funny and chaotic moments. But also a lot of moments that made me feel really sad for little Hal.

[Charlotte Dean · Rating 5 out of 5]

One big thing I learned is how favoritism can hurt. Aunt Kathy had her favorite, Jerry. To her, Jerry was the golden child. He could do anything, and she would still praise him. But Harold, he was not the favorite. He had to fight just to be seen, just to feel like he mattered. That kind of thing leaves deep pain inside a child.

This story shows what happens when one child is always lifted up and the other is pushed down. It doesn’t just affect kids when they’re little, it follows them as they grow older. Many families have this same problem, one child gets all the love, the others get little or nothing. Reading Harold’s story made me think about how easy it is to repeat that mistake in our own homes without even noticing. This book is a reminder that every child needs love, not just the ‘favorite'.

[J Mays · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Raw and Relatable Journey of Family, Pain, and Healing

My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift hit home in ways I didn’t expect. As a 50-year-old Black woman, I know what it’s like to navigate complicated family relationships, and Hal’s story felt deeply familiar. His late Aunt Kathy was more storm than sunshine in his life, yet her passing left him with an unexpected path to healing.

What I loved most was Hal’s honesty—he doesn’t shy away from the pain but finds humor and reflection in it. His writing is raw, real, and surprisingly funny at times, showing that even our most painful relationships can leave behind something meaningful. If you’ve ever struggled to make peace with a difficult family member, this book is a must-read. Whew this really brought back memories.

[Joi L · Rating 5 out of 5]

Breaking Free from the Grip of Control!!!

As a 30-year-old woman who grew up under the weight of a controlling, overly religious father with bipolar tendencies, My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift felt like reading my own story in someone else’s words. Hal’s Aunt Kathy reminded me of the kind of love that’s tangled up with fear—where faith is used as a weapon instead of a source of peace. The emotional whiplash, the guilt, the impossible standards—I’ve lived that.

What moved me most was how Hal found his own way to heal, not by excusing the past, but by facing it with honesty and even humor. This book reminded me that freedom doesn’t always come from an apology—it comes from deciding to let go. A raw, relatable, and deeply necessary read.