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Enough about Me: Find Lasting Joy in the Age of Self
"Lord knows that we have more than enough books about ourselves and never enough books about the God that created us. It isn't until we see him that we can then make sense of ourselves. I believe Jen Oshman’s book accomplishes that by widening our vision and helping us fall in love with seeing God again." (Jackie Hill Perry, poet; author; hip-hop artist)
Women today feel a constant pressure to improve themselves and just never feel like they’re “enough.” All too often, they live their daily lives disheartened, disillusioned, and disappointed. That’s because joy doesn’t come from a new self-improvement strategy; it comes from rooting their identity in who God says they are and what he has done on their behalf.
This book calls women to look away from themselves in order to find the abundant life God offers them — contrasting the cultural emphasis on personal improvement and empowerment with what the Scriptures say about a life rooted, built up, and established in the gospel.
Women today feel a constant pressure to improve themselves and just never feel like they’re “enough.” All too often, they live their daily lives disheartened, disillusioned, and disappointed. That’s because joy doesn’t come from a new self-improvement strategy; it comes from rooting their identity in who God says they are and what he has done on their behalf.
This book calls women to look away from themselves in order to find the abundant life God offers them — contrasting the cultural emphasis on personal improvement and empowerment with what the Scriptures say about a life rooted, built up, and established in the gospel.
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First published March 1, 2020
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March 14, 2020
I just finished this book yesterday, and I believe it’s a much needed message for the 21st century Christian woman who is being told through every media outlet, instagram post, and bestselling book that not only does she deserve every earthly happiness, but SHE is responsible for making that happiness a reality, no matter what.
What a backwards message!
You know what, we can do all the things: self-care, self-love, self-improvement, self-empowerment, but at the end of the day, we will never find lasting joy and peace at the end of the rainbow colored with self-focus. We weren’t meant to fulfill our own heart’s desires. We weren’t meant to live for ourselves. We can chase dreams of happiness rooted in having and being and doing all we desire, but it won’t be enough if we’re not anchored in Christ and His kingdom.
When we are rooted, built up, and established in Christ, we find purpose, fulfillment, contentment, and true, lasting joy. Our frail, sinful flesh could never provide what our souls need for satisfaction (and thank the Lord for that—what a hollow existence that would be!), but when we turn our eyes to Christ and fix our gaze on Him, we’ll find that meaning and joy in belonging to Him and fulfilling His purposes.
I hope you’ll pick up Jen’s book and be encouraged that you were made for more than what the world tells you you need to be happy.
What a backwards message!
You know what, we can do all the things: self-care, self-love, self-improvement, self-empowerment, but at the end of the day, we will never find lasting joy and peace at the end of the rainbow colored with self-focus. We weren’t meant to fulfill our own heart’s desires. We weren’t meant to live for ourselves. We can chase dreams of happiness rooted in having and being and doing all we desire, but it won’t be enough if we’re not anchored in Christ and His kingdom.
When we are rooted, built up, and established in Christ, we find purpose, fulfillment, contentment, and true, lasting joy. Our frail, sinful flesh could never provide what our souls need for satisfaction (and thank the Lord for that—what a hollow existence that would be!), but when we turn our eyes to Christ and fix our gaze on Him, we’ll find that meaning and joy in belonging to Him and fulfilling His purposes.
I hope you’ll pick up Jen’s book and be encouraged that you were made for more than what the world tells you you need to be happy.
February 11, 2020
First sentence: I am nearing my fortieth birthday. In just a couple weeks my friends and family will gather to celebrate, and I’m looking forward to it. Forty. It’s a much-anticipated age.
Sadly, this is a MUCH NEEDED book. If I could, if I had the power, I would make EVERY ABOUT-TO-BE-PUBLISHED author read this book before his/her book is actually published. Perhaps the line has always been a blur between Christian living and self-help books. Perhaps looking at the publisher of a book used to give readers more of a clue as to if it was "self-help" or "Christian living." Perhaps in days gone by Christian living used to be less me-me, me. Or maybe not. That's not an experiment I want to commit to making--to read all the Christian living books that have been published over the last hundred years.
So what is this one about? It's about GOD, GOD, GOD, GOD, GOD, yes, and did I mention it was about God?!?! The title essentially says it all, this is not a book telling YOU that YOU have all the answers, and that YOU are enough, and that everything you need is right there inside of YOU just waiting for you to tap into YOUR own strength, own destiny, own gibber-gabber. The book covers how to do life--as a godly, God-fearing, God-believing, God-worshipping woman.
I loved, loved, loved it. It truly counters essentially everything you're taught by the world, by society, by culture, by the books you read, by the music you listen to, by the shows you watch. Stop lying to yourself--it urges. Wake up! Take note!
"When we deify ourselves, we require reality to conform to our own desires, rather than the other way around (conforming ourselves to reality). And whether we know it or not, this self-deification requires us to worship ourselves, to uphold ourselves, to convince ourselves that we are enough and worthy of following. When we become our own source of meaning, we also become our only source of satisfaction and fulfillment. We set ourselves in a cycle of defining ourselves and worshiping ourselves. To uphold this worldview, we must become our own masters. Ironically, we don’t actually become free. We must not only muster our own meaning and goals and dreams, but we must supply our own energy and ability to accomplish them. With ourselves on the throne we must truly be self-made women: we must conjure up everything from the meaning of life to the energy and ability to live it out. This makes us fragile. It’s all on us. Today we have to create our worlds and make them go round too. The problem with self-deification is that it limits oneself to oneself. We disable ourselves by not permitting ourselves to look to something bigger—something outside (or someone outside, as we’ll investigate in the next chapter)—for our meaning and purpose. Our only hope is to believe ourselves when we say we are enough."
"We twenty-first-century women have been running on ourselves, rather than our God. We’ve been running on self-help, self-empowerment, and self-actualization. The fuel of self has run out, and that’s why we’re tired and discouraged and even in crisis. Enough about me. And enough about you. If we want to keep running, we need to run on the fuel we’re made for—God himself."
What we think of as empowering ourselves is really crippling ourselves.
Oshman invites readers to ask different questions, and seek answers in God's Word. She shares with her readers the BIG PICTURE story of the Bible; how all 66 books of the Bible work to tell one story. It's a grand, action-packed story in four parts: creation, fall, redemption, and restoration.
"These four movements make up the big story of the Bible. God created us, we rebelled against him, he redeemed us, and one day all will be restored. That big story about God is also our story because we were made in his image. We must know that we’re a part of that story before we can know what we must do. It’s in tethering ourselves to that story—in recognizing that we were created on purpose for a purpose—that we will thrive. God says, I made you in my image to live for my glory. Culture says, Be self-made in whatever image you like and live for your own glory. This is a counterfeit calling, and it’s killing us."
I definitely get the impression that Oshman believes wholeheartedly that man's chief end is to glorify God and to enjoy him forever. (Westminster Shorter Catechism, Q/A 1)
The whole book cover to cover is a solid, compelling, truth-packed, gospel-saturated read that though marketed to women is relevant to everyone. Men and women could benefit by reading this one and doing a little self-reflection. It has depth and substance. It isn't fluff--the opposite of it, in fact. It offers much food for thought, and asks readers to challenge themselves.
"Our intuition says the more we prioritize ourselves, the better we will feel about ourselves. But in reality, the more you and I look at ourselves, the more we loath ourselves because we fall short. When we fix our eyes on Jesus, when we behold our good God and ponder what he has done, your self worth and mine is elevated. We remember that we have inherent value as dearly created children. We remember that we are chosen, adopted, and loved (see Gal. 3:26–27). In other words, when we transition from self-focus to Jesus-focus, we actually end up with a better self-image—because it’s dependent on him who made us, not on ourselves. Because God is the author of our lives and the Redeemer of our souls, we will thrive when we study him, know him, love him, root ourselves in him, and renew our minds in him. Feasting on him, beholding him, and making the change from me-ology to theology is the key to your wellbeing and mine."
"Life is lived in minutes, which add up to hours and days and years. Whatever we love most each minute is what drives our action in the present. Those minutes build, one on top of the other. Life is a culmination of our momentary desires. Whatever our hearts love each minute will lead us for a lifetime. We are what we love. Each of us must therefore ask, What do I love? What am I loving the most right now?"
"Here’s the telltale sign that our god, our faith, and our calling are small and self-created: we find ourselves at the center of them all. You and I must ask ourselves if the values of our god are identical to our own. Have we reworded the Bible so that it matches our preferences, rather than us being changed by it? Are we living exactly like our non-Christian friends and family and simply slapping a #blessed on all we do? Are we being stretched beyond ourselves? In our quest for joy, are we living for our own glory, our own name, our own success? Can we honestly say that our Christianity requires faith? Because what Jesus asks of us requires great faith. He asks you and me to die. And in that death, he promises joy."
"If your devotional book, your women’s Bible study, your pastor, your favorite Christian author, or your Christian best friend don’t encourage you to come and die, an alarm should go off in your head. If their messages are for self-preservation and self-promotion, you know they don’t match God’s word. If they want to bless you on the small cycle, you know it’s not the life Jesus has for you."
Sadly, this is a MUCH NEEDED book. If I could, if I had the power, I would make EVERY ABOUT-TO-BE-PUBLISHED author read this book before his/her book is actually published. Perhaps the line has always been a blur between Christian living and self-help books. Perhaps looking at the publisher of a book used to give readers more of a clue as to if it was "self-help" or "Christian living." Perhaps in days gone by Christian living used to be less me-me, me. Or maybe not. That's not an experiment I want to commit to making--to read all the Christian living books that have been published over the last hundred years.
So what is this one about? It's about GOD, GOD, GOD, GOD, GOD, yes, and did I mention it was about God?!?! The title essentially says it all, this is not a book telling YOU that YOU have all the answers, and that YOU are enough, and that everything you need is right there inside of YOU just waiting for you to tap into YOUR own strength, own destiny, own gibber-gabber. The book covers how to do life--as a godly, God-fearing, God-believing, God-worshipping woman.
I loved, loved, loved it. It truly counters essentially everything you're taught by the world, by society, by culture, by the books you read, by the music you listen to, by the shows you watch. Stop lying to yourself--it urges. Wake up! Take note!
"When we deify ourselves, we require reality to conform to our own desires, rather than the other way around (conforming ourselves to reality). And whether we know it or not, this self-deification requires us to worship ourselves, to uphold ourselves, to convince ourselves that we are enough and worthy of following. When we become our own source of meaning, we also become our only source of satisfaction and fulfillment. We set ourselves in a cycle of defining ourselves and worshiping ourselves. To uphold this worldview, we must become our own masters. Ironically, we don’t actually become free. We must not only muster our own meaning and goals and dreams, but we must supply our own energy and ability to accomplish them. With ourselves on the throne we must truly be self-made women: we must conjure up everything from the meaning of life to the energy and ability to live it out. This makes us fragile. It’s all on us. Today we have to create our worlds and make them go round too. The problem with self-deification is that it limits oneself to oneself. We disable ourselves by not permitting ourselves to look to something bigger—something outside (or someone outside, as we’ll investigate in the next chapter)—for our meaning and purpose. Our only hope is to believe ourselves when we say we are enough."
"We twenty-first-century women have been running on ourselves, rather than our God. We’ve been running on self-help, self-empowerment, and self-actualization. The fuel of self has run out, and that’s why we’re tired and discouraged and even in crisis. Enough about me. And enough about you. If we want to keep running, we need to run on the fuel we’re made for—God himself."
What we think of as empowering ourselves is really crippling ourselves.
Oshman invites readers to ask different questions, and seek answers in God's Word. She shares with her readers the BIG PICTURE story of the Bible; how all 66 books of the Bible work to tell one story. It's a grand, action-packed story in four parts: creation, fall, redemption, and restoration.
"These four movements make up the big story of the Bible. God created us, we rebelled against him, he redeemed us, and one day all will be restored. That big story about God is also our story because we were made in his image. We must know that we’re a part of that story before we can know what we must do. It’s in tethering ourselves to that story—in recognizing that we were created on purpose for a purpose—that we will thrive. God says, I made you in my image to live for my glory. Culture says, Be self-made in whatever image you like and live for your own glory. This is a counterfeit calling, and it’s killing us."
I definitely get the impression that Oshman believes wholeheartedly that man's chief end is to glorify God and to enjoy him forever. (Westminster Shorter Catechism, Q/A 1)
The whole book cover to cover is a solid, compelling, truth-packed, gospel-saturated read that though marketed to women is relevant to everyone. Men and women could benefit by reading this one and doing a little self-reflection. It has depth and substance. It isn't fluff--the opposite of it, in fact. It offers much food for thought, and asks readers to challenge themselves.
"Our intuition says the more we prioritize ourselves, the better we will feel about ourselves. But in reality, the more you and I look at ourselves, the more we loath ourselves because we fall short. When we fix our eyes on Jesus, when we behold our good God and ponder what he has done, your self worth and mine is elevated. We remember that we have inherent value as dearly created children. We remember that we are chosen, adopted, and loved (see Gal. 3:26–27). In other words, when we transition from self-focus to Jesus-focus, we actually end up with a better self-image—because it’s dependent on him who made us, not on ourselves. Because God is the author of our lives and the Redeemer of our souls, we will thrive when we study him, know him, love him, root ourselves in him, and renew our minds in him. Feasting on him, beholding him, and making the change from me-ology to theology is the key to your wellbeing and mine."
"Life is lived in minutes, which add up to hours and days and years. Whatever we love most each minute is what drives our action in the present. Those minutes build, one on top of the other. Life is a culmination of our momentary desires. Whatever our hearts love each minute will lead us for a lifetime. We are what we love. Each of us must therefore ask, What do I love? What am I loving the most right now?"
"Here’s the telltale sign that our god, our faith, and our calling are small and self-created: we find ourselves at the center of them all. You and I must ask ourselves if the values of our god are identical to our own. Have we reworded the Bible so that it matches our preferences, rather than us being changed by it? Are we living exactly like our non-Christian friends and family and simply slapping a #blessed on all we do? Are we being stretched beyond ourselves? In our quest for joy, are we living for our own glory, our own name, our own success? Can we honestly say that our Christianity requires faith? Because what Jesus asks of us requires great faith. He asks you and me to die. And in that death, he promises joy."
"If your devotional book, your women’s Bible study, your pastor, your favorite Christian author, or your Christian best friend don’t encourage you to come and die, an alarm should go off in your head. If their messages are for self-preservation and self-promotion, you know they don’t match God’s word. If they want to bless you on the small cycle, you know it’s not the life Jesus has for you."
March 12, 2020
The Believe-In-Yourself Gospel is the junk food. It is a me-centered teaching has crept in, set up camp, and been so widely accepted that we don't even wrestle with it anymore. The me centered Gospel has left us wanting and unsatisfied. There is hope!
Are you tired? Are you run-down? Have you gone thru the Christian Treadmill of activities, relationships, and have gone up empty. The simple reason we are running on empty is our self-reliance. Even our teaching can be me centered and our Christian radio. It is so subtle that we don't even notice it. However, we do feel the affects. What is the root of the me-centered gospel? It is attractive and to be honest, it made me think of Eve and her attraction to the apple. I think this book is so needed for us today. It is not about putting us down as women but raising us up to be women focused on what really matters. To become more alive in Christ than dead in our own choices. "We look to ourselves, to the products we choose and buy, to the methods we choose to live by, to the things we can produce, and to the lifestyle choices we make for our value and identity."
This text will ask the tough questions and it will give you honest answers. Answers that will give you to Jesus and to be his daughter! Highly recommend.
A Special Thank you to Crossway Publishing and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.
Are you tired? Are you run-down? Have you gone thru the Christian Treadmill of activities, relationships, and have gone up empty. The simple reason we are running on empty is our self-reliance. Even our teaching can be me centered and our Christian radio. It is so subtle that we don't even notice it. However, we do feel the affects. What is the root of the me-centered gospel? It is attractive and to be honest, it made me think of Eve and her attraction to the apple. I think this book is so needed for us today. It is not about putting us down as women but raising us up to be women focused on what really matters. To become more alive in Christ than dead in our own choices. "We look to ourselves, to the products we choose and buy, to the methods we choose to live by, to the things we can produce, and to the lifestyle choices we make for our value and identity."
This text will ask the tough questions and it will give you honest answers. Answers that will give you to Jesus and to be his daughter! Highly recommend.
A Special Thank you to Crossway Publishing and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.
December 29, 2019
"Enough About Me" is for anyone who feels tired, burned out, or who feels like they are not enough. By reminding us who we are and whose we are, Jen kindly encourages readers to look away from themselves and to look instead to Jesus, powerfully reminding them that true, lasting joy is found only in him. I genuinely wish I'd had it ago, but I'm so thankful to have read it now. This book will lift your gaze in a way that will change your life.
April 23, 2023
Really enjoyed this refreshing message . . . which is basically the message of the Cross, and what the Bible teaches us :) it's the antidote to the me-ology that is served up everywhere today. If all the self-love, self-worth, 'you are enough', 'you can't love others until you love yourself', messages left you still feeling completely empty like it did me... read this. <3
June 24, 2021
Love, love this book. This is the second time I’ve read it, and I know it won’t be the last.
January 27, 2020
Self. The very word makes postmodern people proud. After all, we are encouraged each day to please ourselves, nurture ourselves, and congratulate ourselves. Self-promotion is considered a virtue in our age. This propensity to narcissism is part of the warp and woof of contemporary culture. Self-absorption is so prevalent that Ryan Holiday takes the subject up in his recent book, Ego is the Enemy. It appears that “we” are the hero in our own epic drama. Tragically, this drama has an ending that is anything but happy.
Jen Oshman’s recent book, Enough About Me: Find Lasting Joy in the Age of Self addresses the alarming trend of “me, myself, and I” which has not only invaded the postmodern milieu; it has also subtly crept into the church.
First, Oshman sounds a jolting, yet necessary alarm. She issues a warning that the banner of narcissism is in our midst and it aggressively and relentlessly competes for our attention. While the book is primarily addressed to women, the principles apply across the board. The author notes that we have moved from “relying on self to deifying self,” a shift that has been encouraged as various worldviews have morphed on a godless trajectory.
Second, Oshman moves from cultural diagnosis to theological purpose. She rightly notes the purpose of the Creator as he fashioned people in his image to glorify his name. The contrast between God’s sovereign purposes and our culture is stark:
“God says, ‘I made you in my image to live for my glory. Culture says, ‘Be self-made in whatever image you like and live for your own glory.’ This is a counterfeit calling, and it’s killing us.”
Most important is the prescription which is prescribed by the author. This prescription is both radical and exclusive. And it is fixated on a person, namely, the Lord Jesus Christ. Oshman closely follows the Pauline imperative in Colossians 2:6-7 and commends her readers to get rooted in Christ, built up in Christ, and established in Christ. Anything less will lead to frustration and despair in this life.
The dominant message in Enough About Me one of rest and reliance. The author writes, “ … We can really rest - because we are established in Christ. He is in control. And he is good. And he is alive. He always ensures that his will comes to pass for our good and his glory.” This Christ-exalting theme is a sure foundation and is the ultimate antidote for anyone who has grown weary with platitudes and worldly promises.
Enough About Me is a much-needed book, especially for women in the church who are searching for hope and joy in all the wrong places. Jen Oshman is a faithful and reliable guide who offers one answer - the gospel of Jesus Christ. Her wise counsel will benefit readers who find themselves adrift in our postmodern age and help cut through the fog of uncertainty. I trust that Jen’s book will receive a wide readership and benefit many in the days to come.
Jen Oshman’s recent book, Enough About Me: Find Lasting Joy in the Age of Self addresses the alarming trend of “me, myself, and I” which has not only invaded the postmodern milieu; it has also subtly crept into the church.
First, Oshman sounds a jolting, yet necessary alarm. She issues a warning that the banner of narcissism is in our midst and it aggressively and relentlessly competes for our attention. While the book is primarily addressed to women, the principles apply across the board. The author notes that we have moved from “relying on self to deifying self,” a shift that has been encouraged as various worldviews have morphed on a godless trajectory.
Second, Oshman moves from cultural diagnosis to theological purpose. She rightly notes the purpose of the Creator as he fashioned people in his image to glorify his name. The contrast between God’s sovereign purposes and our culture is stark:
“God says, ‘I made you in my image to live for my glory. Culture says, ‘Be self-made in whatever image you like and live for your own glory.’ This is a counterfeit calling, and it’s killing us.”
Most important is the prescription which is prescribed by the author. This prescription is both radical and exclusive. And it is fixated on a person, namely, the Lord Jesus Christ. Oshman closely follows the Pauline imperative in Colossians 2:6-7 and commends her readers to get rooted in Christ, built up in Christ, and established in Christ. Anything less will lead to frustration and despair in this life.
The dominant message in Enough About Me one of rest and reliance. The author writes, “ … We can really rest - because we are established in Christ. He is in control. And he is good. And he is alive. He always ensures that his will comes to pass for our good and his glory.” This Christ-exalting theme is a sure foundation and is the ultimate antidote for anyone who has grown weary with platitudes and worldly promises.
Enough About Me is a much-needed book, especially for women in the church who are searching for hope and joy in all the wrong places. Jen Oshman is a faithful and reliable guide who offers one answer - the gospel of Jesus Christ. Her wise counsel will benefit readers who find themselves adrift in our postmodern age and help cut through the fog of uncertainty. I trust that Jen’s book will receive a wide readership and benefit many in the days to come.
May 10, 2024
For what it was, this book delivered. It’s biblically grounded. She uses scripture to form her principles rather than finding ways to have scripture back up her beliefs. But it is very much geared towards those who are beginning to realise (or rather need to realise) that your life is not your own, it’s God’s. And then, the basics of what does this practically mean. I’m sure many women need this, and it would be good for new christian women, or women who have put the daily outwork of their faith on the back burner. But many women who have been pursuing their faith actively for a long time, will want a book that challenges them further along the track, and may find this book doesn’t challenge them as much where they are at.
Enjoyably written; the content is probably geared toward a specific audience, but maybe advertised to a different audience.
Enjoyably written; the content is probably geared toward a specific audience, but maybe advertised to a different audience.
May 28, 2022
This was an okay book. Honestly, I think Sick of Me: from Transparency to Transformation did a better job of presenting the same message.
However, I will say that this is a much-needed message for all of us that we need to be reminded of. Life is about God, not us.
However, I will say that this is a much-needed message for all of us that we need to be reminded of. Life is about God, not us.
May 27, 2021
“When we run out of self-preservation, self-help, and self-pity, Jesus is there.”
March 26, 2024
Enough about me is a phenomenal book that thoroughly explains the disappointment of self. Oshman labels self as a siren due to it’s luring capabilities of self reliance. The author does a great job of making a case that Journey with Christ isn’t about you, however this is a walk you walk alongside with Jesus for His Glory.
This book served as a book that builds on top of You’re not enough and that’s okay by Allie Beth Stuckey and Holier than Thou by Jackie Hill Perry. All of these works point to Jesus and the Gospel. All of them emphasizes how this journey with Jesus is a journey thats’ dependent on Him. Self sufficiency will not work. We are limited beings in need of a savior who defies all limits, whose transcendent, Holy, true and Perfect.
If I can put Jen Oshman book Enough about me simply into words is that: you do not belong yourself. You are not your own, you was brought at a high price (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). You belonging to Christ brings joy, peace, and most importantly eternal life. You belonging & relying on yourself leads to exhaustion and disappointment. How great is it to know we serve a God who is greater than I who is dependable and gives us exactly what we need!
Favorite Chapters, Quotes, Ideas
This book served as a book that builds on top of You’re not enough and that’s okay by Allie Beth Stuckey and Holier than Thou by Jackie Hill Perry. All of these works point to Jesus and the Gospel. All of them emphasizes how this journey with Jesus is a journey thats’ dependent on Him. Self sufficiency will not work. We are limited beings in need of a savior who defies all limits, whose transcendent, Holy, true and Perfect.
If I can put Jen Oshman book Enough about me simply into words is that: you do not belong yourself. You are not your own, you was brought at a high price (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). You belonging to Christ brings joy, peace, and most importantly eternal life. You belonging & relying on yourself leads to exhaustion and disappointment. How great is it to know we serve a God who is greater than I who is dependable and gives us exactly what we need!
Favorite Chapters, Quotes, Ideas
Chapter 3: Rooted in Christ: This chapter is wonderfully orchestrated. I literally couldn’t get enough of it. I love how she called out how we as Christians mix Jesus with our own selfish pursuits. Oshman is saying that we can’t have the best of both worlds. Something has to give, and Jesus is choosing me every time! The author is remarkable at weaving the gospel here.
Often we can recognize a counterfeit only when we know the original very well -Jen Oshman
You will never be rescued by our good behavior. W'll never be able to author our own happiness. -Jen Oshman
“The essence of the Christian message is not behaved, but behold”. I seen this thought on Jackie Hill Perry’s book Holier than Thou as well. She states that when you behold you believe, then you become. Both women is emphasize that you become what you look at.
Chapter 6: Built up in Christ can be summarized by this quote: “Grace does not end with salvation.” -Jen Oshman
Overall this is a great book to read. Our culture and generation needs to read this book. It took her a little while to build up her point however it is an encouraging work that reminds me of what the Gospel entails. To lay down your life, just like Jesus. Because there is a greater gift that we can behold.
April 20, 2020
Wow. Jen Oshman has written a phenomenal book. If you're disenchanted by the overwhelming emphasis on self-reliance, something Oshman calls the "Siren Call of Self," then Enough About Me is for you. Largely accessible and very readable, Oshman begins with the frustration many women are feeling now, consistently having been fed the message that we can have it all; that our highest calling is the capability to create our own destinies and be the ever elusive "self-made woman." Beginning with the 1600s, Oshman takes us on a brief tour of the evolution of our beliefs and how they have resulted in self-deification. The problem, Oshmam says, is that self-deification leads to enormous disability as we refuse to permit ourselves to look to something bigger. "When we become our own source of meaning, we also become our only source of satisfaction and fulfillment...we must become our own masters. Ironically, we don't actually become free. We must not only muster our own meaning and goals and dreams, but we must supply our own energy and ability to accomplish them."
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So what then? Oshman believes we can look to Col. 2:6-7 to help us escape from the "small cycle" of faith and grow into a "big, self-denying faith cycle," in which we are worshipping, obeying, confessing to, and following a Big God who is *able*, thus resulting in a robust faith for ourselves which manifests itself in a willingness to deny ourselves and live a life of radical sacrifice.
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⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ for a well-rounded, thoughtful, loving approach that has left me convicted and encouraged. And thank you to @cross for the free copy in exchange for an honest review!
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So what then? Oshman believes we can look to Col. 2:6-7 to help us escape from the "small cycle" of faith and grow into a "big, self-denying faith cycle," in which we are worshipping, obeying, confessing to, and following a Big God who is *able*, thus resulting in a robust faith for ourselves which manifests itself in a willingness to deny ourselves and live a life of radical sacrifice.
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⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ for a well-rounded, thoughtful, loving approach that has left me convicted and encouraged. And thank you to @cross for the free copy in exchange for an honest review!
March 3, 2020
Much of the church has been lured by the siren call of self which permeates our western culture today and the author rings the bell loudly to wake us up as to why these sirens are and will continue to leave us shipwrecked. It is a lie that we will ever be happy and fulfilled outside of Christ. He made us and we are made for Him and we will only ever be happy and fulfilled when our identities are rooted in Him and what He accomplished on our behalf at the cross. She brings to light all of the destructive lies that will eventually damn us if they are followed like that we can be "good" enough, that we can "do what makes us happy" and actually be happy, that we can care for ourselves enough where we are content. Instead, she points us back to the gospel which bids us to come and die so that we may truly live. She so beautifully reminds us that He is enough, so enough about us. I can't more highly recommend this book.
September 16, 2020
“In this age of self, enough about you and me. May we be so rooted, so built up, and so established in the gospel that our gratitude abounds and our joy is full”
A must read for believers in a time where the world, and even popular “Christian culture” states that we can save ourselves and help ourselves. The author calls her readers to be reminded that Jesus tells us to lay down our lives because our ultimate joy and satisfaction can only be found in Him.
A must read for believers in a time where the world, and even popular “Christian culture” states that we can save ourselves and help ourselves. The author calls her readers to be reminded that Jesus tells us to lay down our lives because our ultimate joy and satisfaction can only be found in Him.
November 3, 2024
EVERYONE READ THIS BOOK! This book hit me so hard where I needed as I’m deep in the trenches of new motherhood. God used Jen’s words to speak truth to my heart and remind me that life isn’t about me. Culture wants to tell us the complete opposite, but oh how it will leave us dissatisfied and grasping at the wind.
Thank you, Jen! I loved this book!
Thank you, Jen! I loved this book!
December 15, 2021
Short. Sweet. Refreshing.
November 13, 2025
I’d give this a 4.5 rounded up!
This book is very timely with our culture constantly pointing all of our attention on ourselves. She had great examples, anecdotes and pointed us to scripture and Jesus. Her discussion questions were thoughtful and helpful.
More than anything, I enjoyed it because I read through it with 3 sisters and felt deeply encouraged by our discussion. Would recommend!
This book is very timely with our culture constantly pointing all of our attention on ourselves. She had great examples, anecdotes and pointed us to scripture and Jesus. Her discussion questions were thoughtful and helpful.
More than anything, I enjoyed it because I read through it with 3 sisters and felt deeply encouraged by our discussion. Would recommend!
December 9, 2022
I waited for this book to “arrive” at its point, and felt like it occurred at the very end (dying to self is the path of lasting joy) without much further explanation. I wish she expanded more and provided more experience or wisdom here. Maybe I was expecting more, but nonetheless a very biblical book full of truth. I appreciate the short summary of how our culture has become self-oriented from the philosophies of Freud, Kant, etc.
April 29, 2025
Wer sein Leben erhalten will, der verleugne sich und folge mir nach.
Es wird deutlich wie frei die uns schwer fallende Selbstverleugnung macht.
Den Blick weg vom Selbst hin zu Jesus.
Nur das Wie ist noch schwammig.
Es wird deutlich wie frei die uns schwer fallende Selbstverleugnung macht.
Den Blick weg vom Selbst hin zu Jesus.
Nur das Wie ist noch schwammig.
April 9, 2024
A very useful little book with a very important reminder - especially if you're anything like me and you often 'self-help' yourself into a state that only Jesus can get you out of! Very convicting, and I would definitely recommend!
May 22, 2024
I forgot I had wanted to read this until my dear friend Tina (hi Tina!) suggested we read and discuss together. I’m so glad she suggested it because I needed to read this. At this age I’m aware of how much I need to and want to improve, and it’s easy to make a long list and start working towards those goals. Jen Oshman reminds us that we must look away from ourselves to be rooted in God and our identity in Him. I loved how this book focused on all that God has done on our behalf, most importantly the work on the cross, so that I don’t have to strive endlessly on my own. In looking away from myself I’m able to find abundant life in God. The goal is to be established and rooted in Christ for my identity. Some people may think these truths are too simple but I really needed to have all of this spelled out to me, and I see myself needing to reread this book for these simple but significant truths in the future. My notes keep repeating how it is in God that we find purpose and true joy instead of in our own accomplishments and striving, and that focusing on Him gives us this freedom.
August 30, 2020
Oshman’s message is painfully necessary in a time where the “do whatever makes you happy” lifestyle has infiltrated Christian teaching. I gave this three stars because I felt like I had to weed through some cheesier metaphors and tangents to get to the meat of what she was trying to say. However, this book has given me much food for thought regarding how dangerous it is to take His Word and alter it or mis-interpret it to create a cutesy-quote encouraging a life of comfort and indulgence. This is a sobering reminder that we are called to self-sacrifice, self-denial, and taking up our cross to follow Him.
January 24, 2021
There was a lot to like about this book - easy to listen to, interesting a illustrations and of course a premise that is entirely appropriate and a helpful challenge to put me-centres culture (even within the church, sadly). There were times that I found some nuance missing from argument, and I was much less engaged in the second half of the book. I also tire easily of a critical approach to the church, even when I know there is truth to hear. All that said, I think this is a book that would be really helpful to reflect about what the true call of discipleship is.
May 10, 2020
This book seems to be the antidote to Girl Wash Your Face, Untamed, or really any other recent popular self help book out there. Instead of saying “look inside yourself for true happiness and lasting joy,” Jen calls us to look toward Christ and his word for ultimate joy and fulfillment.
February 15, 2020
Enough About Me: Finding Lasting Joy in the Age of Self, by Jen Oshamn, is a book that is needed for our culture, to fight against the it’s all about me, I can do myself, I am enough mentality that is being shared and taught to us starting as children. Jen shares statics and research about the mental and emotional health crisis and the suicide rates that have increased due to this message that is everywhere. She goes back and shares the history and worldviews from past cultures so that we can see how we got here. From this we see why truth, right and wrong are now facing issues. Discernment has been thrown out. Another issue facing us, is the me-centered culture, which results in all the self help books out there on Christian shelves and stores geared towards women. Women are wearing out and less happy now, then past few decades even though our living has greatly improved and we have so many wonderful opportunities. Jen tackles this and much more with research from past theologians, history, worldview, and Scripture. All while she points us back to our Creator and Savior. This is no fluff book, you may feel your toes getting stepped on, but I think you will feel relived and encouraged by the truth she shares. This whole book is theologically solid and by the end of the book you will have a lot to ponder on.
This is a book all women should read, and I might even say leaders in the church too, to see what is we women are being fed and faced with. This would make a great group study book, as she provides discussion questions at the end of each chapter that would make for great conversation with others.
Here are a few quotes from the book. I had so much highlighted it was hard to narrow it down.
Reformer John Calvin called it five hundred years ago when he said, “For the plague of submitting to our own rule leads us straight to ruin.” Truly, we are lost in a darkness of our own making, and we got here by dethroning God and enthroning ourselves.
This turning to God is a sort of death. We ultimately realize we cannon handle ourselves, our souls, our futures, our contentment. We need something, someone, outside of ourselves. We need our Creator who is also our Redeemer, our rescuer, our load bearer.
God says, ‘I made you in my image to live for my glory. Culture says, ‘Be self-made in whatever image you like and live for your own glory.’ This is a counterfeit calling, and it’s killing us.
If your devotional book, your women’s Bible study, your pastor, your favorite Christian author, or your Christian best friend don’t encourage you to come and die, an alarm should go off in your head. If their messages are for self-preservation and self-promotion, you know they don’t match God’s word. If they want to bless you on the small cycle, you know it’s not the life Jesus has for you.
Life is lived in minutes, which add up to hours and days and years. Whatever we love most each minute is what drives our action in the present. Those minutes build, one on top of the other. Life is a culmination of our momentary desires. Whatever our hearts love each minute will lead us for a lifetime. We are what we love. Each of us must therefore ask, What do I love? What am I loving the most right now?
This is a book all women should read, and I might even say leaders in the church too, to see what is we women are being fed and faced with. This would make a great group study book, as she provides discussion questions at the end of each chapter that would make for great conversation with others.
Here are a few quotes from the book. I had so much highlighted it was hard to narrow it down.
Reformer John Calvin called it five hundred years ago when he said, “For the plague of submitting to our own rule leads us straight to ruin.” Truly, we are lost in a darkness of our own making, and we got here by dethroning God and enthroning ourselves.
This turning to God is a sort of death. We ultimately realize we cannon handle ourselves, our souls, our futures, our contentment. We need something, someone, outside of ourselves. We need our Creator who is also our Redeemer, our rescuer, our load bearer.
God says, ‘I made you in my image to live for my glory. Culture says, ‘Be self-made in whatever image you like and live for your own glory.’ This is a counterfeit calling, and it’s killing us.
If your devotional book, your women’s Bible study, your pastor, your favorite Christian author, or your Christian best friend don’t encourage you to come and die, an alarm should go off in your head. If their messages are for self-preservation and self-promotion, you know they don’t match God’s word. If they want to bless you on the small cycle, you know it’s not the life Jesus has for you.
Life is lived in minutes, which add up to hours and days and years. Whatever we love most each minute is what drives our action in the present. Those minutes build, one on top of the other. Life is a culmination of our momentary desires. Whatever our hearts love each minute will lead us for a lifetime. We are what we love. Each of us must therefore ask, What do I love? What am I loving the most right now?
May 29, 2023
Star Rating: 3.75
This book contains a much needed message for our day. I kept finding myself wanting to read the books she was often quoting from by authors such as James K.A. Smith, Os Guinness, and John Calvin.
There were definitely some quote-worthy moments in the chapters of this one, and lots of Scripture cited that made this book feel like drinking in God’s Word at times.
My only dislike was that at times the book seemed repetitive, such as sharing a quote and then reiterating it so closely which didn’t seem necessarily.
Overall, I’m glad to have read this book and would recommend it, especially to newer believers or to those in need of this message regardless of the number of years they’ve been believers.
Notable Quotes:
“The truth of the gospel is meant to transform us. . . It is meant to be the very center of our lives as followers of Christ.”
“The superficial use of the Scriptures in pursuit of what they can offer you and me individually is destructive because we don’t know what we’re missing. As we snack on little tidbits here and there, we miss the feast that God has intended to serve us . . . We insist on the Bible only serving our particular moment, our day, our needs, our habits, and we therefore miss out on a fuller, deeper understanding of God’s big story.”
“We’re attempting to create God in our image, rather than walking as creatures made in his. Instead of asking ‘How can I serve God?’ We are asking ‘How can God serve me?’”
“We’re a generation that has been raised on spiritual fast food, and we’re sick . . . The gospel is the most nourishing food we could ingest for our souls. And it is devoid of self. It’s all about Christ crucified, risen, and coming again.”
“…will we face whatever God asks us with joy? Will we allow ourselves to be propelled by gospel gratitude away from self and toward our Lord?“
This book contains a much needed message for our day. I kept finding myself wanting to read the books she was often quoting from by authors such as James K.A. Smith, Os Guinness, and John Calvin.
There were definitely some quote-worthy moments in the chapters of this one, and lots of Scripture cited that made this book feel like drinking in God’s Word at times.
My only dislike was that at times the book seemed repetitive, such as sharing a quote and then reiterating it so closely which didn’t seem necessarily.
Overall, I’m glad to have read this book and would recommend it, especially to newer believers or to those in need of this message regardless of the number of years they’ve been believers.
Notable Quotes:
“The truth of the gospel is meant to transform us. . . It is meant to be the very center of our lives as followers of Christ.”
“The superficial use of the Scriptures in pursuit of what they can offer you and me individually is destructive because we don’t know what we’re missing. As we snack on little tidbits here and there, we miss the feast that God has intended to serve us . . . We insist on the Bible only serving our particular moment, our day, our needs, our habits, and we therefore miss out on a fuller, deeper understanding of God’s big story.”
“We’re attempting to create God in our image, rather than walking as creatures made in his. Instead of asking ‘How can I serve God?’ We are asking ‘How can God serve me?’”
“We’re a generation that has been raised on spiritual fast food, and we’re sick . . . The gospel is the most nourishing food we could ingest for our souls. And it is devoid of self. It’s all about Christ crucified, risen, and coming again.”
“…will we face whatever God asks us with joy? Will we allow ourselves to be propelled by gospel gratitude away from self and toward our Lord?“
June 6, 2020
In Enough about Me: Find Lasting Joy in the Age of Self, Jen Oshman dismantles the false promises and burdensome demands of the self-help movement, encouraging women to find joy and rest in Christ. At the beginning, she charts the history of ideas, showing how cultural movements over time led to the contemporary belief that women can do it all, have it all, and manage everything themselves. She then challenges these messages with the gospel story, explaining that God designed us to glorify Him, not ourselves, and that when we root ourselves in Christ, we can live out our callings with peace and joy, instead of experiencing the angst, disappointment, and panic of believing that everything depends on us.
Oshman also addresses problematic distortions of Scripture, explaining that salvation is not a project that we have to manage by our own power and determination. She writes in detail about the gospel's implications for different areas of life, drawing on Scripture, personal stories, and other people's testimonies to provide tangible, concrete images of what it looks like to fix our eyes on Christ and live in His power. These teachings were all familiar to me, but Oshman reinforces them well and will open the eyes of women who are used to shallow theology.
This book is great for personal reading, but it is also an excellent choice for a church reading group. Unlike many books for women, this one speaks to a variety of different ages and life stages, and Oshman never assumes that all of her readers are mothers, or that everyone has the same background and life experiences. This book can be an encouraging resource and relationship-building opportunity for women in reading groups, since the thoughtful, open-ended discussion questions give everyone an equal opportunity to connect and share.
I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
Oshman also addresses problematic distortions of Scripture, explaining that salvation is not a project that we have to manage by our own power and determination. She writes in detail about the gospel's implications for different areas of life, drawing on Scripture, personal stories, and other people's testimonies to provide tangible, concrete images of what it looks like to fix our eyes on Christ and live in His power. These teachings were all familiar to me, but Oshman reinforces them well and will open the eyes of women who are used to shallow theology.
This book is great for personal reading, but it is also an excellent choice for a church reading group. Unlike many books for women, this one speaks to a variety of different ages and life stages, and Oshman never assumes that all of her readers are mothers, or that everyone has the same background and life experiences. This book can be an encouraging resource and relationship-building opportunity for women in reading groups, since the thoughtful, open-ended discussion questions give everyone an equal opportunity to connect and share.
I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
September 1, 2022
Centrado en el evangelio. Un libro que me hubiera gustado haber leído hace años.
El libro esta lleno de recordatorios necesarios. Las páginas son refrescante, por lo cual hace una lectura fluida, llena de la Palabra y la Verdad de Dios.
Es corto el libro, pero se tiene que leer despacio para poder meditar en las preguntas que tiene al final de cada capítulo.
Por su estructura este libro puede ser un recurso alentador y una oportunidad para crear un grupo de lectura para mujeres, ya que las preguntas invitan a debatir de manera reflexiva; dando la oportunidad de conectarse y compartir unas con las otras.
Cito:
«Solo la misericordia que se nos mostró en la cruz puede inspirarnos a hacer cualquier cosa que requiera entrega, sumisión o sufrimiento.» p.158
«A medida que tú y yo crecemos en nuestra comprensión de nuestro Dios, nuestra fe se hace más grande, y estamos equipados para responder a Su gran llamado.» (p.172)
El libro esta lleno de recordatorios necesarios. Las páginas son refrescante, por lo cual hace una lectura fluida, llena de la Palabra y la Verdad de Dios.
Es corto el libro, pero se tiene que leer despacio para poder meditar en las preguntas que tiene al final de cada capítulo.
Por su estructura este libro puede ser un recurso alentador y una oportunidad para crear un grupo de lectura para mujeres, ya que las preguntas invitan a debatir de manera reflexiva; dando la oportunidad de conectarse y compartir unas con las otras.
Cito:
«Solo la misericordia que se nos mostró en la cruz puede inspirarnos a hacer cualquier cosa que requiera entrega, sumisión o sufrimiento.» p.158
«A medida que tú y yo crecemos en nuestra comprensión de nuestro Dios, nuestra fe se hace más grande, y estamos equipados para responder a Su gran llamado.» (p.172)
July 6, 2022
4.5* but that’s mostly me being picky about writing style.
“Let’s admit that we are not enough, and turn to the God who is.”
“Any deviation from biblical Christianity can be detected when we are told to turn our practices and habits inward on ourselves, rather than outward on our marvelous Savior.”
“When we confess that we are not enough; that we don’t have the power within ourselves to be fulfilled; that we sin; that we fall short; that we make messes of our own lives and others’; that we cannot make it in this life on our own; that Jesus is the only way, the only truth, and the only life, then we can finally unclench our white-knuckle grip and exhale.”
“Enough about me. And enough about you. If we want to keep running, we need to run on the fuel we’re made for—God himself. We will indeed be restless until then.”
“Let’s admit that we are not enough, and turn to the God who is.”
“Any deviation from biblical Christianity can be detected when we are told to turn our practices and habits inward on ourselves, rather than outward on our marvelous Savior.”
“When we confess that we are not enough; that we don’t have the power within ourselves to be fulfilled; that we sin; that we fall short; that we make messes of our own lives and others’; that we cannot make it in this life on our own; that Jesus is the only way, the only truth, and the only life, then we can finally unclench our white-knuckle grip and exhale.”
“Enough about me. And enough about you. If we want to keep running, we need to run on the fuel we’re made for—God himself. We will indeed be restless until then.”
May 23, 2022
"We Western women have supped at the buffet of options. We really have tried to figure this thing out. As much as we 'do what makes you happy,' we're still falling short. It's not delivering. In fact, studies show that we're less happy than ever."
"God is so gracious to grow us and change us as we walk with him. Lasting joy comes from that journey, and he's eager to provide it to you and to me. Life in Christ - real life, the losing of this life for the gaining of his - is the powerful antidote that stands ready to respond to the discouragement and disillusionment created by the age of self."
Seven short chapters with questions for thought or discussion at the end of each. This would make a great book for a study or discipleship group.
2022 A book about Christian living
"God is so gracious to grow us and change us as we walk with him. Lasting joy comes from that journey, and he's eager to provide it to you and to me. Life in Christ - real life, the losing of this life for the gaining of his - is the powerful antidote that stands ready to respond to the discouragement and disillusionment created by the age of self."
Seven short chapters with questions for thought or discussion at the end of each. This would make a great book for a study or discipleship group.
2022 A book about Christian living
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