What do you think?
Rate this book
Deze brieven eindigen in tranen
Bessem ziet Fatima voor het eerst op het voetbalveld en het is liefde op het eerste gezicht. Eén speelse knipoog van Fatima en Bessem weet dat haar leven nooit meer hetzelfde zal zijn. In Kameroen, een land waar relaties tussen mensen van hetzelfde geslacht strafbaar zijn, is een gezamenlijke toekomst voor Bessem en Fatima uitgesloten. Wanneer Fatima wordt opgepakt bij een politie-inval in de enige homobar in de stad, verdwijnt ze vervolgens. Bessem blijft ontredderd achter.
Dertien jaar later is Bessem hoogleraar aan de universiteit. Wanneer ze een gemeenschappelijke vriendin tegenkomt – de laatste persoon die Fatima misschien heeft gezien – begint Bessem aan een zoektocht naar haar verloren liefde.
Deze brieven eindigen in tranen is het liefdesverhaal van een christelijk meisje met een rebels hart en een moslimmeisje dat een dubbelleven leidt.
Dertien jaar later is Bessem hoogleraar aan de universiteit. Wanneer ze een gemeenschappelijke vriendin tegenkomt – de laatste persoon die Fatima misschien heeft gezien – begint Bessem aan een zoektocht naar haar verloren liefde.
Deze brieven eindigen in tranen is het liefdesverhaal van een christelijk meisje met een rebels hart en een moslimmeisje dat een dubbelleven leidt.
320 pages, Paperback
First published March 12, 2024
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 580 reviews
November 9, 2023
Actual rating 4.5 stars.
These Letters End in Tears is a beautiful literary story that reminded me of The Death of Vivek Oji, and the short story God's Children Are Little Broken Things. Christian Belem always felt different. Different because she's a lesbian in Cameroon, a country where being gay is punishable by law. She constantly feels like two beings are living inside her. One content with boredom, and the other on the lookout for something thrilling. And then she falls for Muslim Fatima, or Fati, a female soccer player who plays with boys. Nowadays, Fatima would at least be a butch lesbian or maybe even non-binary or trans-masc. But back then, she was Fatima, whose chest was flat because she wore binders and clothes designed for boys.
This story is written in a moving timeline. One second, you're in the now, and then the story is jumping back to Bessem’s memories or one of her letters to Fatima, each like Bessem says, ending in tears. This kind of writing can be confusing, but the moving timeline added something special to this compelling and heartwrenching novel. Bessem's guild became my guild, her despair became my despair, her search for Fatima became my search.
The second chapter already caused a big lump closing off my throat, and tears leaped into my eyes. Anger also built up in me, just like when I read The Death of Vivek Oji. It always makes me livid and sad that people can't just be who they want to be. Bessem's letters ended in tears, but after finishing this devastating and stunning love story, I ended up in tears myself. For those who loved The Death of Vivek Oji or those who love emotional and epic novels, please read this book!
I received an ARC from Catapult and Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.
Follow me on Instagram
These Letters End in Tears is a beautiful literary story that reminded me of The Death of Vivek Oji, and the short story God's Children Are Little Broken Things. Christian Belem always felt different. Different because she's a lesbian in Cameroon, a country where being gay is punishable by law. She constantly feels like two beings are living inside her. One content with boredom, and the other on the lookout for something thrilling. And then she falls for Muslim Fatima, or Fati, a female soccer player who plays with boys. Nowadays, Fatima would at least be a butch lesbian or maybe even non-binary or trans-masc. But back then, she was Fatima, whose chest was flat because she wore binders and clothes designed for boys.
This story is written in a moving timeline. One second, you're in the now, and then the story is jumping back to Bessem’s memories or one of her letters to Fatima, each like Bessem says, ending in tears. This kind of writing can be confusing, but the moving timeline added something special to this compelling and heartwrenching novel. Bessem's guild became my guild, her despair became my despair, her search for Fatima became my search.
The second chapter already caused a big lump closing off my throat, and tears leaped into my eyes. Anger also built up in me, just like when I read The Death of Vivek Oji. It always makes me livid and sad that people can't just be who they want to be. Bessem's letters ended in tears, but after finishing this devastating and stunning love story, I ended up in tears myself. For those who loved The Death of Vivek Oji or those who love emotional and epic novels, please read this book!
I received an ARC from Catapult and Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.
Follow me on Instagram
November 11, 2024
The author did not lie when they said that these letters end in tears because I was bawling!!!!
Set in Cameroon, a country where being gay will get you sent to jail or worse. We meet a Christian girl, Bessem who falls in love with a Muslim girl and they both start living a double life. Their love is instant, strong, and it feels as if time has stopped for both of them. Bessem wants more, she wants to be seen in public together. Fatimah knows the fate that awaits them if someone finds out their secret.
After months of begging, Fatima relents and they go to a bar together where they are found by Fatima’s brother who is a staunch Muslim. He leads an assault on his sister and Bessem, gets them locked up. Bessem family comes to bail her out, and after she goes back to school, she never hears from Fatima again. Did she flee the country? What did her brother tell the family? Was she married off? Did Fatima just abandon her?
After years of trying to get answer from anyone who will speak to her Bessem is still not closer to finding out where Fatima is. Everyone’s moved on but Bessem keeps writing these letters for when Fatima returns. Will they be reunited?
This book is deeply moving. I remember reading and pausing between chapters because the writing felt so real. The story of Fatima and Bessem is the story of so many especially in places where being gay is a crime. I am happy the author is writing about this.
I highly recommend this.
Set in Cameroon, a country where being gay will get you sent to jail or worse. We meet a Christian girl, Bessem who falls in love with a Muslim girl and they both start living a double life. Their love is instant, strong, and it feels as if time has stopped for both of them. Bessem wants more, she wants to be seen in public together. Fatimah knows the fate that awaits them if someone finds out their secret.
After months of begging, Fatima relents and they go to a bar together where they are found by Fatima’s brother who is a staunch Muslim. He leads an assault on his sister and Bessem, gets them locked up. Bessem family comes to bail her out, and after she goes back to school, she never hears from Fatima again. Did she flee the country? What did her brother tell the family? Was she married off? Did Fatima just abandon her?
After years of trying to get answer from anyone who will speak to her Bessem is still not closer to finding out where Fatima is. Everyone’s moved on but Bessem keeps writing these letters for when Fatima returns. Will they be reunited?
This book is deeply moving. I remember reading and pausing between chapters because the writing felt so real. The story of Fatima and Bessem is the story of so many especially in places where being gay is a crime. I am happy the author is writing about this.
I highly recommend this.
September 28, 2025
3.5 stars
Sad and important book that details the pervasive homophobia and anti-queer discrimination in Cameroon. Devastating novel and shows how bigotry and hate can really disrupt and frankly destroy healthy relationships (romantic, familial, and platonic). I found the writing style a little one-dimensional and monotone, though of course the contents of this book are so necessary and powerful. Though it’s a different topic, makes me think of the ongoing transphobia in the U.S. and so many other ongoing systems of oppression. The fight continues.
Sad and important book that details the pervasive homophobia and anti-queer discrimination in Cameroon. Devastating novel and shows how bigotry and hate can really disrupt and frankly destroy healthy relationships (romantic, familial, and platonic). I found the writing style a little one-dimensional and monotone, though of course the contents of this book are so necessary and powerful. Though it’s a different topic, makes me think of the ongoing transphobia in the U.S. and so many other ongoing systems of oppression. The fight continues.
February 16, 2024
This was so beautifully written and devastating. If you've read and loved The Death of Vivek Oji, I recommend this one for similar vibes.
I loved the format that our narrator Bessem, was directly speaking to her long-lost love, Fatima, as she tries searching for her years later.
This is a tender novel that explores the difficulties of being queer in Cameroon and the ramifications it has on the queer community who just want to be themselves and love who they love. This is a novel that explores long-lost love, the one you never forget and ultimately never getting closure.
The writing was poignant, powerful and devastating and in just over 220 pages, the author conveys so much in such a short novel.
I will not soon forget about this one.
Thanks Catapult for my physical and digital copies for review.
I loved the format that our narrator Bessem, was directly speaking to her long-lost love, Fatima, as she tries searching for her years later.
This is a tender novel that explores the difficulties of being queer in Cameroon and the ramifications it has on the queer community who just want to be themselves and love who they love. This is a novel that explores long-lost love, the one you never forget and ultimately never getting closure.
The writing was poignant, powerful and devastating and in just over 220 pages, the author conveys so much in such a short novel.
I will not soon forget about this one.
Thanks Catapult for my physical and digital copies for review.
June 19, 2024
I liked this! But I wanted to like it much more than I actually did end up liking it.
The plot was engaging, and it presented information about Cameroon in an accessible way. It details how society enables and defends male violence. It was overall interesting and emotional and is well worth a read, but the things that bothered me were unfortunately very distracting.
My biggest issue is with the format. I don’t typically even like epistolaries, but somehow I am very annoyed by the fact that this novel is barely the epistolary it presents itself as. It doesn’t include a greeting or a signature in the chapters, even though they are meant to be independent letters (i think?). The problem with this is that the novel seems to jump back and forth between being an epistolary and being in a normal, present tense narrative? This would be fine if a greeting were at the beginning of the letter sections so that this was clear to the audience. Instead, I just had no idea what was meant to be going on. It really seems like the epistolary format was just so that the title could say “these letters” and no attention to this choice was given beyond that.
The following complaints are less specific to this book and more relate to epistolaries in general but were definitely present in this work:
1. The novel is full of romantic hindsight. This does lead to some great lines, but also prevents the development of the main relationship from seeming organic (there’s more of an insta-love vibe).
2. There’s a strange oscillation between colloquial and formal writing that makes the tone and rhythm feel strange at some points. The narrator knows the recipient of the letters very well, so colloquialisms are normal, but it just makes the writing awkward at times because the switch is so sudden and jarring. The novel is almost fighting with the format.
3. The exposition seems so out of place. Bessem is writing to someone from the same society, but the author is explaining things to readers who are not from Cameroon. Even though I didn’t know the information, I was wondering why Fatima was being told information that she already knew, and it annoyed me.
This isn’t as related to the epistolary format, but the writing is very frank. There is definitely some rhythm and flow, but it seems generally overwritten, as the impact of some very beautiful lines is muted by their subsequent over-explanation (which could be due to the epistolary format, but i’m not sure).
Similarly, the explanation of some of the emotions comes off strange. It takes a normal, universal emotion that readers can accept, and then explains it like nobody has ever felt it before the narrator. It just kind of caught me off-guard. Especially since Fatima would have felt a lot of the same feelings so Bessem wouldn’t need to explain them to her….
I was also looking for a bit more religious commentary based on the summary, but that expectation could be completely on me.
Lastly, good thing I don’t really care about liking the characters in a book because I can definitely tell why people would not like Bessem at times…
The plot was engaging, and it presented information about Cameroon in an accessible way. It details how society enables and defends male violence. It was overall interesting and emotional and is well worth a read, but the things that bothered me were unfortunately very distracting.
My biggest issue is with the format. I don’t typically even like epistolaries, but somehow I am very annoyed by the fact that this novel is barely the epistolary it presents itself as. It doesn’t include a greeting or a signature in the chapters, even though they are meant to be independent letters (i think?). The problem with this is that the novel seems to jump back and forth between being an epistolary and being in a normal, present tense narrative? This would be fine if a greeting were at the beginning of the letter sections so that this was clear to the audience. Instead, I just had no idea what was meant to be going on. It really seems like the epistolary format was just so that the title could say “these letters” and no attention to this choice was given beyond that.
The following complaints are less specific to this book and more relate to epistolaries in general but were definitely present in this work:
1. The novel is full of romantic hindsight. This does lead to some great lines, but also prevents the development of the main relationship from seeming organic (there’s more of an insta-love vibe).
2. There’s a strange oscillation between colloquial and formal writing that makes the tone and rhythm feel strange at some points. The narrator knows the recipient of the letters very well, so colloquialisms are normal, but it just makes the writing awkward at times because the switch is so sudden and jarring. The novel is almost fighting with the format.
3. The exposition seems so out of place. Bessem is writing to someone from the same society, but the author is explaining things to readers who are not from Cameroon. Even though I didn’t know the information, I was wondering why Fatima was being told information that she already knew, and it annoyed me.
This isn’t as related to the epistolary format, but the writing is very frank. There is definitely some rhythm and flow, but it seems generally overwritten, as the impact of some very beautiful lines is muted by their subsequent over-explanation (which could be due to the epistolary format, but i’m not sure).
Similarly, the explanation of some of the emotions comes off strange. It takes a normal, universal emotion that readers can accept, and then explains it like nobody has ever felt it before the narrator. It just kind of caught me off-guard. Especially since Fatima would have felt a lot of the same feelings so Bessem wouldn’t need to explain them to her….
I was also looking for a bit more religious commentary based on the summary, but that expectation could be completely on me.
Lastly, good thing I don’t really care about liking the characters in a book because I can definitely tell why people would not like Bessem at times…
March 14, 2024
”If by some chance you happen on these letters, know that I waited for you. And if you don’t find me, it is not because I stopped waiting. It would be that my body simply surrendered one day from the pain of losing you.”
5 stars. My feelings are so fucking hurt right now I don’t know what to do. This was gut wrenching. Beautifully written and told but my God am I in pain right now. In the back of my mind I knew where things were going but I was full of hope that it wouldn’t. Reader, it went there and I’m still shook. This is one of those books that I’m at a loss for words and am not sure how to review this properly. All I have are emotions. Lots and lots of emotions.
I’m a ball of emotions right now but this was a heartbreaking but important read and I would recommend it highly. Just go in knowing that it’s a tragedy but one worth reading and experiencing. I might come back and clean this review up and give this book a proper review one day but for now this is all I’ve got.
{Challenges completed:
✔A Million More Pages: A Thrifting We Will Go Challenge
✔Turn of a Page: Restaurant Hopping Challenge
✔For Love of a Book: We Need a Cupid Challenge
✔For Love of a Book Disney’s 100th Celebration Challenge}
5 stars. My feelings are so fucking hurt right now I don’t know what to do. This was gut wrenching. Beautifully written and told but my God am I in pain right now. In the back of my mind I knew where things were going but I was full of hope that it wouldn’t. Reader, it went there and I’m still shook. This is one of those books that I’m at a loss for words and am not sure how to review this properly. All I have are emotions. Lots and lots of emotions.
I’m a ball of emotions right now but this was a heartbreaking but important read and I would recommend it highly. Just go in knowing that it’s a tragedy but one worth reading and experiencing. I might come back and clean this review up and give this book a proper review one day but for now this is all I’ve got.
{Challenges completed:
✔A Million More Pages: A Thrifting We Will Go Challenge
✔Turn of a Page: Restaurant Hopping Challenge
✔For Love of a Book: We Need a Cupid Challenge
✔For Love of a Book Disney’s 100th Celebration Challenge}
April 29, 2024
3.5 stars. The epistolary style didn't quite do this story justice, although it did aid in making it a shorter story/quicker read. I loved the bones of this but there wasn't quite enough oomph for me. Definitely painted a picture of what it's like to be queer in Cameroon.
April 28, 2024
Such a heart-breaking story! I didn’t realize what being queer was like in Cameroon, so I’m really glad I read this to get more of an understanding. But I’m also glad I read this to know the love story between Bess and Fatima. I really loved that this was written in letters to Fatima (except sometimes they were written as if to someone else because Fatima’s name would be written instead of “you” and that confused me?)
November 4, 2025
5 stars 🌟
I don't even know what to say. 5 stars. Absolutely fantastic. Incredible writing and very moving story. Though unfortunately there was only 1 letter, i was.hoping for more. But the title is apt otherwise, did leave me in tears!
Reviewed on 4th November 2025
DISCLAIMER-All opinions on books I’ve read and reviewed are my own, and are with no intention to offend anyone. If you feel offended by my reviews, let me know how I can fix it.
How I Rate-
1 star- Hardly liked anything/ was disappointed
2 star- Had potential but did not deliver/ was disappointed
3 stars- Was ok but could have been better/ was average / Enjoyed a lot but something was missing
4 stars- Loved a lot but something was missing
5 stars- Loved it/ new favourite
I don't even know what to say. 5 stars. Absolutely fantastic. Incredible writing and very moving story. Though unfortunately there was only 1 letter, i was.hoping for more. But the title is apt otherwise, did leave me in tears!
Reviewed on 4th November 2025
DISCLAIMER-All opinions on books I’ve read and reviewed are my own, and are with no intention to offend anyone. If you feel offended by my reviews, let me know how I can fix it.
How I Rate-
1 star- Hardly liked anything/ was disappointed
2 star- Had potential but did not deliver/ was disappointed
3 stars- Was ok but could have been better/ was average / Enjoyed a lot but something was missing
4 stars- Loved a lot but something was missing
5 stars- Loved it/ new favourite
April 29, 2024
Bessem is complete chaos. Honestly work.
April 14, 2024
Extremely eye opening to the nightmare that queer people face in other countries, seen through various ways of coping. The realistic outcome really sells this on how horrific being disregarded at every turn can be, but that there can be hope in persevering and exploring different options to seek justice. The author does a very good job of expressing that the majority of the book is read as if to Fatima, while some chapters read in the present. Overall, glad I read this one.
April 28, 2024
God I loved this book. I did accidentally have to speed through in 2 hours before book club but I loved it.
December 26, 2023
4.5 stars rounded slightly down. This was short and very sweet, a story of young love and how it can stay with you for decades. This was a really special read for me in many ways; partially because I'm very ignorant and know next to nothing about Cameroon or life there and this really challenged some biases I didn't realize I had, and partially because it really hit me where it hurt in reminding me of the intensity of relationships between women, especially at that age, and how deep it can be. This one doesn't have a happy ending, unfortunately, and I wished it was a bit longer, but it told a really important story that I hope a lot of people have the pleasure and privilege of reading.
September 8, 2024
Each of these letters ends in tears, Fati. Years and years have gone by and I’m still stuck in my memories of you, stuck in this place between misery and sweet recollection.
2.5 stars. I wish I were giving this a higher rating, I really do. The book is everything it says on the tin: an emotional literary fiction book about two girls in love in a time and place where that love is illegal, and a shifting narrative between the present and past. Several of the chapters take the form of letters from Bessem to Fatima, as she goes on a search for Fatima after their long years of separation.
With material like this, it's easy to make me emotional, and the book did succeed at this at first. A country where being gay is literally punishable by law, with corrupt police and citizens willing to discipline you on the spot, where secrecy and shame seem to go hand in hand with your sexuality. A lot of stark, boldfaced violence. But there was also a lot of beauty and sweetness, especially in the beginning. I loved the meet-cute so much, and all the titbits we got about their courtship and the beginning of their relationship. Fatima is so dapper and charming in a way that's so easy to fall for, even when she gets a little cocky and annoying. (I loved those passages about how she owned her masculinity, something which isn't exclusive to men.) The narrative jumps around a fair bit, and we kept going back to uncover parts of their life together, how they were driven apart, and what life looks like now as Bessem starts her search. The writing was good; not particularly striking, but really easy to read and really good at capturing the characters.
I don't know when my opinion started to go down, but it did eventually. I do feel like the writing quality took a dip, or maybe I just started to notice things that annoyed me. A lot of the dialogue was stiff in a way where I was constantly reminded that I was reading a book. Who talks like that? Simple conversations between friends or old acquaintances or even strangers felt inauthentic and staged, and it kept pulling me out of the narrative. At some point, the way the narrative kept jumping around also got on my nerves. Like, I didn't mind going back for the scenes when they were younger. But there were several instances where we'd flash back to a week ago or a day ago, and a lot of it felt like stuff that could have been related to the reader chronologically? IDK. I'm being picky. The book, or at least the characters, sometimes got a little essentialist in terms of gender and sexuality, which was frustrating to read, even though I understood where the attitudes came from.
And I just didn't love how things turned out in the end? The sudden introduction of the possibility of Bessem being an unreliable narrator, a bunch of reveals and info-dropping that came out of nowhere. The ending wasn't very surprising to me, but the steps we took to get there... IDK. It elicited no emotion from me. Those last few chapters were ALL tell, with a lot of characters saying a bunch of stuff out loud that could have been left for prose or metaphor or some sort of subtlety. Besides not being surprising, I also just didn't... enjoy it?
In the end, I do think it comes down to the writing. It wasn't bad! But with this type of story, for it to really hit the spot, I needed there to be something remarkable about it. I still liked it for its themes, and I did enjoy the characters, and the way the author unapologetically delved into all the dark sides of this society. But this just wasn't a favourite.
Content warnings:
March 23, 2026
Quella sbagliata non sei tu!!!
Musih Tedji Xaviere, classe 1989, vince il premio Pontas & JJ Bola per scrittori emergenti, soprattutto grazie alla sua testardaggine.
Quell’ostinata fermezza che spinge verso l’obiettivo nonostante che lo si debba raggiungere controcorrente.
“Solo gli uomini possono diventare scrittori” le dicevano...
Un felice esordio per questa scrittrice camerunense che in These Letters End in Tears riesce a raccontare una storia dolorosa con una delicatezza inaspettata.
Bellissima la copertina di Alex Nabaum nell'edizione italiana di Astoria:
una ragazza di profilo con una coda di cavallo spezzata e la cui estremità si fonde nella terra formando delle radici.
Poche volte un’immagine di copertina è così indicativa di ciò che stiamo andando a leggere.
In esergo:
Per quelli che vivono nascondendosi. Non siete soli
E’ nel campus universitario di Bamenda (città del Camerun occidentale) che Bessem e Fatima si rincontrano dopo una prima scintilla tra loro mesi prima.
Sembrano nate per stare insieme: il classico colpo di fulmine da manuale e andrebbe tutto bene se tutto ciò non fosse riprovevole agli occhi della gente.
"Ero arrabbiata con il mondo, che ci aveva trasformato in due blatte a loro agio soltanto al buio."
Xaviere ci dipinge con un certo sarcasmo l'ipocrisia di un paese fondato sul separatismo e la corruzione. Personaggi che di giorno conducono campagne omofobe anche violente e poi hanno una doppia vita.
Fatima e Bessem sono travolte da una passione indicibile fino a quando qualcuno riesce a separarle.
Picchiate con violenza e messe in carcere non si vedranno mai più.
Sono passati tredici anni e Bessem ha accumulato centinaia di lettere mai spedite finché un giorno vede di sfuggita al mercato un’amica di Fatima che potrebbe sapere qualcosa….
Queste le linee narrative di un romanzo appassionante che lascia quell'amaro in bocca per la consapevolezza di quello che succede in molti paesi dove l'amore è consentito su un unico binario.
Un esorcismo, un manicomio, la prigione, un plotone di esecuzione (vedi in Senegal ma non solo): succede davvero..
"Un giorno, questo posto evolverà sicuramente al punto in cui una ragazza potrà guardarne un’altra con desiderio senza temere per la propria vita. Forse, nel giro di poco, storie come la nostra avranno un finale felice."
Musih Tedji Xaviere, classe 1989, vince il premio Pontas & JJ Bola per scrittori emergenti, soprattutto grazie alla sua testardaggine.
Quell’ostinata fermezza che spinge verso l’obiettivo nonostante che lo si debba raggiungere controcorrente.
“Solo gli uomini possono diventare scrittori” le dicevano...
Un felice esordio per questa scrittrice camerunense che in These Letters End in Tears riesce a raccontare una storia dolorosa con una delicatezza inaspettata.
Bellissima la copertina di Alex Nabaum nell'edizione italiana di Astoria:
una ragazza di profilo con una coda di cavallo spezzata e la cui estremità si fonde nella terra formando delle radici.
Poche volte un’immagine di copertina è così indicativa di ciò che stiamo andando a leggere.
In esergo:
Per quelli che vivono nascondendosi. Non siete soli
E’ nel campus universitario di Bamenda (città del Camerun occidentale) che Bessem e Fatima si rincontrano dopo una prima scintilla tra loro mesi prima.
Sembrano nate per stare insieme: il classico colpo di fulmine da manuale e andrebbe tutto bene se tutto ciò non fosse riprovevole agli occhi della gente.
"Ero arrabbiata con il mondo, che ci aveva trasformato in due blatte a loro agio soltanto al buio."
Xaviere ci dipinge con un certo sarcasmo l'ipocrisia di un paese fondato sul separatismo e la corruzione. Personaggi che di giorno conducono campagne omofobe anche violente e poi hanno una doppia vita.
Fatima e Bessem sono travolte da una passione indicibile fino a quando qualcuno riesce a separarle.
Picchiate con violenza e messe in carcere non si vedranno mai più.
Sono passati tredici anni e Bessem ha accumulato centinaia di lettere mai spedite finché un giorno vede di sfuggita al mercato un’amica di Fatima che potrebbe sapere qualcosa….
Queste le linee narrative di un romanzo appassionante che lascia quell'amaro in bocca per la consapevolezza di quello che succede in molti paesi dove l'amore è consentito su un unico binario.
Un esorcismo, un manicomio, la prigione, un plotone di esecuzione (vedi in Senegal ma non solo): succede davvero..
"Un giorno, questo posto evolverà sicuramente al punto in cui una ragazza potrà guardarne un’altra con desiderio senza temere per la propria vita. Forse, nel giro di poco, storie come la nostra avranno un finale felice."
January 8, 2024
These Letters End in Tears is a beautiful debut novel that I cannot recommend enough.
The story takes place in Cameroon where a woman, Bessem, is looking for her lost love, Fatima, who she lost contact with after a brutal homophobic attack.
While the premise of the story can be very hard to swallow and unpleasant to even hear about, Musih Tedji Xaviere does an excellent job of showing the beauty of LGBTQ+ relationships, both romantic and platonic, under oppressive government rule. As a matter of fact, my favorite aspects of the book were seeing Bessem interact with other queer people in Cameroon. I loved seeing how even under dire circumstances LGBTQ people still find ways to persevere and build community.
If you enjoy reading books about the lives of people outside of the United States, LGBTQ+ people's experiences and relationships, and don't mind a sad story, I highly recommend These Letters End in Tears! Musih Tedji Xaviere is an author to keep an eye out for.
Thank you Netgalley and Catapult for sending me an advance reader copy in exchange for this honest review.
The story takes place in Cameroon where a woman, Bessem, is looking for her lost love, Fatima, who she lost contact with after a brutal homophobic attack.
While the premise of the story can be very hard to swallow and unpleasant to even hear about, Musih Tedji Xaviere does an excellent job of showing the beauty of LGBTQ+ relationships, both romantic and platonic, under oppressive government rule. As a matter of fact, my favorite aspects of the book were seeing Bessem interact with other queer people in Cameroon. I loved seeing how even under dire circumstances LGBTQ people still find ways to persevere and build community.
If you enjoy reading books about the lives of people outside of the United States, LGBTQ+ people's experiences and relationships, and don't mind a sad story, I highly recommend These Letters End in Tears! Musih Tedji Xaviere is an author to keep an eye out for.
Thank you Netgalley and Catapult for sending me an advance reader copy in exchange for this honest review.
December 11, 2024
Grein, as per ush
March 16, 2024
This one was a gut puncher. It is so so so beautifully written, you feel like you are there experiencing everything with the characters, all to be saddened by the ending. Unfortunately, I am sure people face these same problems irl and this book helps shed a light onto that.
February 24, 2025
3 stars
★★★
the letters didn’t end fast enough!
i didn’t connect with any of the characters… like at all. i also had no idea what was going on most of the time but the last 60 pages saved this from being a 2-star.
★★★
the letters didn’t end fast enough!
i didn’t connect with any of the characters… like at all. i also had no idea what was going on most of the time but the last 60 pages saved this from being a 2-star.
February 5, 2024
gorgeous. lived for this
April 20, 2024
Sobbing.
May 2, 2024
fucking hell
September 18, 2025
These Letters End in Tears by Musih Tedji Xaviere follows Bessem, who falls for Fatima, a Muslim woman. Things get messy because being queer in Cameroon is illegal. Then a police raid happens, Fatima vanishes, and Bessem spends the next thirteen years writing her letters she never sends. The book explores themes of repression, LGBTQ+ life in Cameroon, and grief.
I loved reading about being queer in Cameroon, which I’ll admit is a bit out of my radar (I think this is my first time reading a book set there?). It was frustrating and sad to read about the bullying and political intimidation/repression surrounding the topic. The writing was excellent and the characters were great too, which made me care about them big time. Like, you cannot help but worry about whatever happened to Fatima (is she alive? Hurt? Imprisoned? Married to god knows who?).
I was a bit worried this would be trauma porn, but I found the book covers political homophobia and its (at times violent) repression in a clinical way—not dramatized, but just there because it is. The focus instead was on the grief and frustration that follows, as well as how it impacts society (heterosexual “us” vs. the “abnormal other,” I guess?). I liked that the emphasis was put on the ways LGBTQ+ people find spaces to be themselves, even if it’s not always safe.
The title screams “this won’t end well,” but did I still hope for a happy ending? You bet.
I loved reading about being queer in Cameroon, which I’ll admit is a bit out of my radar (I think this is my first time reading a book set there?). It was frustrating and sad to read about the bullying and political intimidation/repression surrounding the topic. The writing was excellent and the characters were great too, which made me care about them big time. Like, you cannot help but worry about whatever happened to Fatima (is she alive? Hurt? Imprisoned? Married to god knows who?).
I was a bit worried this would be trauma porn, but I found the book covers political homophobia and its (at times violent) repression in a clinical way—not dramatized, but just there because it is. The focus instead was on the grief and frustration that follows, as well as how it impacts society (heterosexual “us” vs. the “abnormal other,” I guess?). I liked that the emphasis was put on the ways LGBTQ+ people find spaces to be themselves, even if it’s not always safe.
The title screams “this won’t end well,” but did I still hope for a happy ending? You bet.
June 24, 2026
we have official confirmation folks! contrary to biology, i am 70% steeped bitterness and 30% water.
i hate it when this happens, i really do. this is a classic case of "it's me, not you." from an objective perspective, there is a lot to appreciate here. reading about Cameroon and the tensions between the anglophone and francophone communities was genuinely educational and fascinating.
more than half of the story is told through a massive, retrospective letter to fatima, where bessem recounts the history of their burgeoning romance. the problem is that these letters felt incredibly rambly, relying on a mountain of "telling" rather than showing. it reads like a laundry list of this happened, and then that happened, and then I felt this, and XYZ. less like a living story and more like a half-remembered recollection of events told through this cloying, hazy lens of nostalgia. the frustrating part is that the scenes that actually managed to pique my interest were entirely too short, while the overall prose sat in an uncomfortable, jarring middle ground between casual colloquialisms and rigid formality.
the book does finally find its footing in the present-day timeline, though. bessem spots a university acquaintance and becomes determined to track down fatima. while I can’t say much without straying into spoiler territory, the domestic and familial relationships were the strongest part of the book. the story captures that hyper-specific, quiet heartbreak of parents expecting you to be a fictionalised version of a person, completely sacrificing actual acceptance for a ghost of who they want you to be.
for a book centered on a star-crossed romance with a heavy reliance on epistolary formatting, i felt remarkably detached. because the emotional core of the romance fell flat for me, the rest of the narrative felt fractured. it’s hard to swallow a devastating premise when you feel like you're looking at the characters through a foggy window rather than living the story with them.
that being said, i would recommend this book. i'm very much in the minority out here, nash (whom i buddy-read this book with) loved it. definitely don't let my rating deter you!
now i'm off to reread This Is How You Lose the Time War for the sixth time! (sapphic, epistolary, sci-fi, falling in love quite literally through various timelines)
Goodreads | My blog | Storygraph | Pinterest | Instagram
Each of these letters ends in tears, Fati. Years and years have gone by and I’m still stuck in my memories of you, stuck in this place between misery and sweet recollection.
i hate it when this happens, i really do. this is a classic case of "it's me, not you." from an objective perspective, there is a lot to appreciate here. reading about Cameroon and the tensions between the anglophone and francophone communities was genuinely educational and fascinating.
more than half of the story is told through a massive, retrospective letter to fatima, where bessem recounts the history of their burgeoning romance. the problem is that these letters felt incredibly rambly, relying on a mountain of "telling" rather than showing. it reads like a laundry list of this happened, and then that happened, and then I felt this, and XYZ. less like a living story and more like a half-remembered recollection of events told through this cloying, hazy lens of nostalgia. the frustrating part is that the scenes that actually managed to pique my interest were entirely too short, while the overall prose sat in an uncomfortable, jarring middle ground between casual colloquialisms and rigid formality.
the book does finally find its footing in the present-day timeline, though. bessem spots a university acquaintance and becomes determined to track down fatima. while I can’t say much without straying into spoiler territory, the domestic and familial relationships were the strongest part of the book. the story captures that hyper-specific, quiet heartbreak of parents expecting you to be a fictionalised version of a person, completely sacrificing actual acceptance for a ghost of who they want you to be.
for a book centered on a star-crossed romance with a heavy reliance on epistolary formatting, i felt remarkably detached. because the emotional core of the romance fell flat for me, the rest of the narrative felt fractured. it’s hard to swallow a devastating premise when you feel like you're looking at the characters through a foggy window rather than living the story with them.
that being said, i would recommend this book. i'm very much in the minority out here, nash (whom i buddy-read this book with) loved it. definitely don't let my rating deter you!
I was naive to believe that the world could bend for us, that our love was powerful enough to alter minds.
now i'm off to reread This Is How You Lose the Time War for the sixth time! (sapphic, epistolary, sci-fi, falling in love quite literally through various timelines)
Goodreads | My blog | Storygraph | Pinterest | Instagram
March 8, 2026
4.5 stars only because the ending was so incredibly sad. The title of this book is so incredibly accurate, a truely tragic story that felt doomed from the beginning yet i was still gripped. this book made me reflect so much on how lucky i am to have such a beautiful supportive community around me. alongside the main characters storyline i loved what Jamal’s character added, i longed for a happier ending for him also. overall freaking amazing book cried lots in the last few chapters, majorly recommend, was good to understand more about the queer experience in Cameroon too.
August 7, 2025
4.25 stars
June 8, 2025
I told myself a couple of weeks ago: maybe I’m way too easy with my 5 ⭐️ handouts. I need to be tougher. Well… then stop giving me these books that I want to give 5 ⭐️’s to! What do you want me to say?!
This was absolutely the right time for me to read this book. Pride month, yes. Obvious. But, also… at a time here in the US when hatred, bigotry, homophobia and the rounding up of human beings is escalating.
The author does a really great job with bringing the location of Cameroon to life here and this is definitely a book where location is like a lead character.
I found my heart aching for the MC who is the 1st person perspective in this. Her challenges, her journey, the relationships… there was so much going on (but not TOO much) and I had a difficult time putting this down and not getting to the ending.
Check TW’s… but this is a really solid and important read.
This was absolutely the right time for me to read this book. Pride month, yes. Obvious. But, also… at a time here in the US when hatred, bigotry, homophobia and the rounding up of human beings is escalating.
The author does a really great job with bringing the location of Cameroon to life here and this is definitely a book where location is like a lead character.
I found my heart aching for the MC who is the 1st person perspective in this. Her challenges, her journey, the relationships… there was so much going on (but not TOO much) and I had a difficult time putting this down and not getting to the ending.
Check TW’s… but this is a really solid and important read.
March 25, 2024
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a full 5 stars!
My heart is broken
The story follows Bessem and Fatima who fall in love in Camaroon where homophobia and the law prevents them from doing so.
When Fatima suddenly disappears, Bessems world collapses.
13 years later an opportunity arises and Bessem starts her search for the truth of Fati’s whereabouts.
It is a mix between letters Bessem writes to Fatima and Bessems search for the truth.
This story held me so tight I was unable to put it down and read it in 2 sittings.
It is tender and beautiful and devastating and heartbreaking.
I can see myself reading this again in the near future!
My heart is broken
The story follows Bessem and Fatima who fall in love in Camaroon where homophobia and the law prevents them from doing so.
When Fatima suddenly disappears, Bessems world collapses.
13 years later an opportunity arises and Bessem starts her search for the truth of Fati’s whereabouts.
It is a mix between letters Bessem writes to Fatima and Bessems search for the truth.
This story held me so tight I was unable to put it down and read it in 2 sittings.
It is tender and beautiful and devastating and heartbreaking.
I can see myself reading this again in the near future!
July 1, 2024
holy fucking hell. this book ended in tears only. I don't know how to review it. a new favourite for sure. bessem and fatima are everything to me 3
July 8, 2025
Totally predicted the ending and it still destroyed me.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 580 reviews