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Bigfoot #3
Bigfoot: I Not Dead
In his eagerly anticipated follow-up to Me Write Book , Bigfoot returns from exile to share his inspiring, hilarious, and often deeply disturbing experiences as a misunderstood forest gentleman and tragic media darling in a book that's the perfect gift for the Sasquatch in your life.
These entertaining and often grizzly stories stand not only as a testament to the greatness of the legendary man-beast, but also as a chilling cautionary tale of the downside of a life of celebrity, cannibalism, celebrity cannibalism, wanton violence, and lack of toilet training. As in Me Write Book , full-color glossy spreads depict every intimate, disgusting, and downright insane moment of Bigfoot’s life. Bigfoot: I Not Dead is an unforgettable memoir that will stay with readers long after his foul scent has dissipated.
These entertaining and often grizzly stories stand not only as a testament to the greatness of the legendary man-beast, but also as a chilling cautionary tale of the downside of a life of celebrity, cannibalism, celebrity cannibalism, wanton violence, and lack of toilet training. As in Me Write Book , full-color glossy spreads depict every intimate, disgusting, and downright insane moment of Bigfoot’s life. Bigfoot: I Not Dead is an unforgettable memoir that will stay with readers long after his foul scent has dissipated.
112 pages, Hardcover
First published April 29, 2008
6 people are currently reading
418 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 188 reviews
July 10, 2015
It's been a few years since our pal's first memoir. He's gotten a bit more mellow, a bit more introspective.
Ah, Bigfoot . . . poetry in your heart, entrails in your hand.
Still, I think it's safe to say that Bigfoot has never known the luxury of an unexpressed thought. He has opinions on everything from self-improvement - Be Oscar Wilde of woods to wolverines - Those bastard crazy to global warming - Bigfoot have warn you for years but no one listen. Al Gore get Nobel Prize, Bigfoot get tasered in shower at mental hospital.
In one poignant section, our beastly buddy talks frankly about his garbage addiction - Start out just recreational. Was at party with raccoons and they offer some.
You'll also learn why Bigfoot is your best bet for Spirit Animal - Eagle stuck up, wolf a nut licker, bear a drunk.
And once again, he get's his Rod McKuen on in a forest poetry slam.
HOT DOGS
How Bigfoot love
Organ meat in tube
Tell me, that testes I taste?
Dinner bell a-ringin'
Oh no can get enough
Good eatz!
Spicy face meatz!
This one probably not as funny as first book, but it Bigfoot! You buy! Buy now!
Ah, Bigfoot . . . poetry in your heart, entrails in your hand.
Still, I think it's safe to say that Bigfoot has never known the luxury of an unexpressed thought. He has opinions on everything from self-improvement - Be Oscar Wilde of woods to wolverines - Those bastard crazy to global warming - Bigfoot have warn you for years but no one listen. Al Gore get Nobel Prize, Bigfoot get tasered in shower at mental hospital.
In one poignant section, our beastly buddy talks frankly about his garbage addiction - Start out just recreational. Was at party with raccoons and they offer some.
You'll also learn why Bigfoot is your best bet for Spirit Animal - Eagle stuck up, wolf a nut licker, bear a drunk.
And once again, he get's his Rod McKuen on in a forest poetry slam.
HOT DOGS
How Bigfoot love
Organ meat in tube
Tell me, that testes I taste?
Dinner bell a-ringin'
Oh no can get enough
Good eatz!
Spicy face meatz!
This one probably not as funny as first book, but it Bigfoot! You buy! Buy now!
January 20, 2018
I was laughing so hard at this book that my girlfriend started making fun of me. Short, weird little vignettes, written by Bigfoot himself, complete with illustrations that look as if they were drawn by a hyperactive and emotionally-disturbed 8-year-old. It only takes 30 minutes to read this, but man, is it worth it!
May 2, 2008
this book is awesome. it's a collection of essays and aphorisms penned by bigfoot in an attempt to have people understand him on a personal level. it's hard to express the subtle humor of this book so i'll give you a little taste of what it's all about. here's what bigfoot has to say to the haters in a piece titled "haters."
haters
"Bigfoot have a lot of critic. People go around and gossip bad about me. Say I a thug, that I evil to core, that I crass, perverted monster. Really they just jealous, Bigfoot live free, do whatever want. If Bigfoot want pay thousands dollars an hour to huck hot dog at beautiful women in unicorn costume who has right to stop Bigfoot? Maybe me did sell out, become too materialistic, but if you ain't dancing in unicorn costume or handing Bigfoot hot dogs, get the hell out of me face."
ain't that the truth.
the illustrations are amazing too. crazy watercolor bigfoot.
haters
"Bigfoot have a lot of critic. People go around and gossip bad about me. Say I a thug, that I evil to core, that I crass, perverted monster. Really they just jealous, Bigfoot live free, do whatever want. If Bigfoot want pay thousands dollars an hour to huck hot dog at beautiful women in unicorn costume who has right to stop Bigfoot? Maybe me did sell out, become too materialistic, but if you ain't dancing in unicorn costume or handing Bigfoot hot dogs, get the hell out of me face."
ain't that the truth.
the illustrations are amazing too. crazy watercolor bigfoot.
February 22, 2009
if want truth, Bigfoot have bad days too. Not always feel like rainbow and sparkle inside. when feeling blue always find good belly laugh and beat something to death brighten day... think, not so much helpless victim; rather, Moist Towelette For the Soul (tm)
Bigfoot tells hard-hitting truths about life in the forest (bear is a drunk), fame, media exploitation (if go to casting call and producer ask you take off clothes, that not normal), violence, loneliness, and bloody murder for sport. The drawings are at least half of the humor, and there are several pages where the "punch line" is the telling blood and gore of another Bigfoot kill.
So first, my kid read this book. He read at least half of it out loud to me. Then he read it again, howling outrageously even though I had a headache. This made me bitter toward this tiny tome, Bigfoot's third book, actually. It took me several days to crack the cover, and then I devoured it quickly. I read half of it out loud to my wife (who may have had a headache, and might possibly become bitter toward it.), and then I read it again to myself, giggling inappropriately at the funniest parts. Then my wife asked me to keep it for a few more days so she could read it. The family that reads this book together..... enjoys blood, poop, and mythological creatures?
What Bigfoot want in special lady is for to be nice to Bigfoot. Tell story, sing song, comb Bigfoot hair and say "Shhh... it OK." Maybe also say dirty thing. Like lady with clean credit record and filthy mouth.
Tell me you fart in me hand and I yours forever, sexy.
March 4, 2019
This book is not for the faint of heart. Bigfoot is not above smashing some heads in.
Told in a set of two page spread memoirs with no, that I could tell, unifying theme other than that of Bigfoot's characterization. It's hilarious and as often as not it's in a cringe-worthy, un-PC way.
Really, this is the only way to describe it, with quotes from the book:
“How many times I have explain? I pee over there, over there and over there. Technically make it Bigfoot territory.”
“Q: Bigfoot, when my Guinea pig wake up? Parents say he sleeping in box in ground in bakc garden.
Suzie, Ag 9, Toronto, Canada
A: Actually Suzie Guinea pig dead and Bigfoot already dig up and eat. If want back Bigfoot probably poop out bones and fur ni day or so. Very delicious, raise him right, he taste like love.”
― Graham Roumieu, Bigfoot: I Not Dead
As you can see, it's pretty grade-school humor so, if you're not above poop and pee jokes, you might like it.
3.5 out of 5 Stars (recommended)
Told in a set of two page spread memoirs with no, that I could tell, unifying theme other than that of Bigfoot's characterization. It's hilarious and as often as not it's in a cringe-worthy, un-PC way.
Really, this is the only way to describe it, with quotes from the book:
“How many times I have explain? I pee over there, over there and over there. Technically make it Bigfoot territory.”
“Q: Bigfoot, when my Guinea pig wake up? Parents say he sleeping in box in ground in bakc garden.
Suzie, Ag 9, Toronto, Canada
A: Actually Suzie Guinea pig dead and Bigfoot already dig up and eat. If want back Bigfoot probably poop out bones and fur ni day or so. Very delicious, raise him right, he taste like love.”
― Graham Roumieu, Bigfoot: I Not Dead
As you can see, it's pretty grade-school humor so, if you're not above poop and pee jokes, you might like it.
3.5 out of 5 Stars (recommended)
August 7, 2018
With all of my reading of children’s chapter books this summer, I just really needed a palate cleanser, if you will, and Bigfoot: I Not Dead just really filled the bill. It is so deeply inappropriate and just so hilarious that the 20 minutes I spent reading it were the favorite minutes of that day.
If you need to get out of a funk, read this and enter the funky miasma that is Bigfoot’s life.
If you need to get out of a funk, read this and enter the funky miasma that is Bigfoot’s life.
March 18, 2010
Now THAT'S some funny .
Somewhere on the list of the best feelings in the world there has to be:
Going to the library, picking up something up on a whim and striking book gold. It's like magic for my eyes. (Occasionally obscene magic, and at times poo poo humor magic, but magic nonetheless.)
Somewhere on the list of the best feelings in the world there has to be:
Going to the library, picking up something up on a whim and striking book gold. It's like magic for my eyes. (Occasionally obscene magic, and at times poo poo humor magic, but magic nonetheless.)
June 18, 2008
An entertaining and quick read and a good gift for those in your life who enjoy a little off-color comedy.
January 5, 2009
Vol. III - I guess I've lived three times, now that I've read this third volume of the autobiography of Bigfoot.
September 29, 2020
I dunno what I was expecting from Bigfoot: I Not Dead. Not sure what to make of it. Is it a graphic novel? Is it a children's book for adults? Is this like Bigfoot non-sequiturs? I just dunno what to do with this review.
I read it. I think it might either be brilliant or cheating. I didn't find it all that funny. Is this supposed to be a coffee table book for twenty-somethings? It wasn't for me. I know that.
Perhaps Bigfoot himself put it best in the section titled: Give and Take:
"Maybe you like a lot of people. Say you used to like Bigfoot but feel you have outgrown. "Moved on". Maybe even hate Bigfoot. Think this book shitty."
Sorry Brofoot.
I read it. I think it might either be brilliant or cheating. I didn't find it all that funny. Is this supposed to be a coffee table book for twenty-somethings? It wasn't for me. I know that.
Perhaps Bigfoot himself put it best in the section titled: Give and Take:
"Maybe you like a lot of people. Say you used to like Bigfoot but feel you have outgrown. "Moved on". Maybe even hate Bigfoot. Think this book shitty."
Sorry Brofoot.
August 10, 2017
More good stuff. This one felt much shorter than, but still fun. The premise is starting to wear a bit thin for me.
October 20, 2018
I know what I’ll be getting folks for Christmas!
December 3, 2024
What a fever dream of a little book. Very funny and also heartwarmingly sweet?
August 1, 2020
It has been quite sometime since a book split both my sides. Laughter doesn't begin to describe what this does, magic is closer.
An even greater gem when you consider it was found on the bargain wall for 1 whole US dollar.
An even greater gem when you consider it was found on the bargain wall for 1 whole US dollar.
July 8, 2021
Quick, short, cute and amusing. A bit graphic at times, so geared more towards adults.
June 9, 2008
First off, this is not a paperback, no matter what Goodreads says.
But about the book. I wasn't interested in this Bigfoot phenomena, sounding like just another pointless humor book. And being from the Pacific Northwest, I had my fill of Bigfoot 20 years ago. But I must admit that I actually liked this book quite a bit! Great art (like the blood!), and a fun character. His back and forth between sensitive/misunderstood and wanting to tear your head off really rings true. As shown in "Good Old Day", where he emotes:
"...people say awful thing about me on internet. It hurt Bigfoot feeling, make cry, want kill all of you."
The book is filled with the duality between emotional pain (feeling it) and physical pain (bringing it).
Also, as he weaves his story of the difficulty of transitioning between from his past to the present, you feel his loss, both from leaving that which he knew (the forest) for something new (civilization), but also the sense of loss that comes from realizing that what you knew wasn't/isn't what you thought it was.
There is also some great, Will Rogers-like, general purpose wisdom:
"...if you ain't dancing in unicorn costume or handing Bigfoot hot dogs, get the hell out of me face."
My personal favorite anecdote was "I not bragging, but..." about his off-off-off Broadway show.
But about the book. I wasn't interested in this Bigfoot phenomena, sounding like just another pointless humor book. And being from the Pacific Northwest, I had my fill of Bigfoot 20 years ago. But I must admit that I actually liked this book quite a bit! Great art (like the blood!), and a fun character. His back and forth between sensitive/misunderstood and wanting to tear your head off really rings true. As shown in "Good Old Day", where he emotes:
"...people say awful thing about me on internet. It hurt Bigfoot feeling, make cry, want kill all of you."
The book is filled with the duality between emotional pain (feeling it) and physical pain (bringing it).
Also, as he weaves his story of the difficulty of transitioning between from his past to the present, you feel his loss, both from leaving that which he knew (the forest) for something new (civilization), but also the sense of loss that comes from realizing that what you knew wasn't/isn't what you thought it was.
There is also some great, Will Rogers-like, general purpose wisdom:
"...if you ain't dancing in unicorn costume or handing Bigfoot hot dogs, get the hell out of me face."
My personal favorite anecdote was "I not bragging, but..." about his off-off-off Broadway show.
April 8, 2012
Poor Bigfoot. So sad and lonely, so misunderstood. So violent and bloodthirsty. But he just wants to belong. And if you don't let him, he might kill you. But really, he likes you. This little book is filled with notes from Bigfoot, trying to explain himself and his life, perhaps in the hopes that if you understand him a little, you won't chase him with torches and pitchforks anymore. Because really, that never ends well for anyone.
Some of my favorite moments:
-- Bigfoot's blind date turns out to be a box woman with squirrels hiding inside, holding a sign that says, "Nobody loves you." Poor, rage-filled Bigfoot.
-- Bigfoot responds to a letter from a 9-year-old who was inquiring about her guinea pig who was "sleeping" in a box underground. Bigfoot tells her it was "very delicious, raise him right, he taste like love." Is it strange that I like the idea that something could taste like love, and that Bigfoot could prize and appreciate that fact?
-- Bigfoot explains that he actually has a very poor sense of direction and often gets lost in the forest, stumbling about and being wacked by branches, lost because every tree looks the same. He just wants some help, so if hear him "screaming in the distance don't run away COME HELP BIGFOOT." Poor guy.
-- The new Olympic sport of Angry Villager Chase, inspired by Bigfoot.
Some of my favorite moments:
-- Bigfoot's blind date turns out to be a box woman with squirrels hiding inside, holding a sign that says, "Nobody loves you." Poor, rage-filled Bigfoot.
-- Bigfoot responds to a letter from a 9-year-old who was inquiring about her guinea pig who was "sleeping" in a box underground. Bigfoot tells her it was "very delicious, raise him right, he taste like love." Is it strange that I like the idea that something could taste like love, and that Bigfoot could prize and appreciate that fact?
-- Bigfoot explains that he actually has a very poor sense of direction and often gets lost in the forest, stumbling about and being wacked by branches, lost because every tree looks the same. He just wants some help, so if hear him "screaming in the distance don't run away COME HELP BIGFOOT." Poor guy.
-- The new Olympic sport of Angry Villager Chase, inspired by Bigfoot.
Read
April 17, 2010Bigfoot's self-improvement essay on positive thinking:
GOOD TO GOODER
Bigfoot pretty amazing guy. Most mystifying thing about Bigfoot not really how evade society for so long, not what have hide in blood soak sack or how keep look so good when other forest creature look like shit. You ever wonder "what the fuck I taste secret ingredient in Bigfoot salad dressing?" NO TELL!
Better question you should be ask Bigfoot is "Bigfoot, how you always stay on sunny side of life?"
Well, if want truth Bigfoot have bad days too. Not always feel like rainbow and sparkle inside. When feeling blue always find good belly laugh and beat something to death brighten day. Just pick weakest in pack, stalk mercilessly, catch and bash all me blues into they face. Think not so much helpless victim; rather, Moist Towelette For The Soul.
(Note: No eat thing after therapy kill, it now be full of evil spirit. Evil spirit taste like artificial watermelon. Nobody likes this.)
GOOD TO GOODER
Bigfoot pretty amazing guy. Most mystifying thing about Bigfoot not really how evade society for so long, not what have hide in blood soak sack or how keep look so good when other forest creature look like shit. You ever wonder "what the fuck I taste secret ingredient in Bigfoot salad dressing?" NO TELL!
Better question you should be ask Bigfoot is "Bigfoot, how you always stay on sunny side of life?"
Well, if want truth Bigfoot have bad days too. Not always feel like rainbow and sparkle inside. When feeling blue always find good belly laugh and beat something to death brighten day. Just pick weakest in pack, stalk mercilessly, catch and bash all me blues into they face. Think not so much helpless victim; rather, Moist Towelette For The Soul.
(Note: No eat thing after therapy kill, it now be full of evil spirit. Evil spirit taste like artificial watermelon. Nobody likes this.)
March 12, 2013
Best early-40th-birthday present ever! I can totally relate to Bigfoot, who's like a cross between Cookie Monster, every Chinese mother/sister/auntie in Amy Tan's books, a mid-life Patrick Bateman, and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. I laughed and laughed, and LOVE the art. Most straightforward and entertaining book on the tragic, hilarious, violent human condition I've read in . . . well, I don't know how long. I really loved it, anyway.
July 10, 2009
A well-spent 20 minutes of reading about killing, eating things, poop, and other off-color humor. But then, so is a Family Guy or a Simpsons episode. While it's good and worth reading, I don't think it's 5-star Goodreads good. Sorry Bigfoot. Please don't kill me, eat me, and poop out my bones a few days later for my wife.
July 6, 2009
I took my time with this one. I limited myself to a few hilarious pages a day, otherwise it would have all been over in just a few minutes. I feel closer to the big guy already!
I cannot wait to get a hold of the other books by Graham. I can only hope they're even 1/10th as funny as I Not Dead.
I cannot wait to get a hold of the other books by Graham. I can only hope they're even 1/10th as funny as I Not Dead.
May 28, 2015
In an effort to break out of my reader's block, I chose this illustrated little book for adults. It felt good and accomplished to finally be able and finish reading an entire book. Granted, it's written by Bigfoot, using atrocious grammar, but the bloody illustratrations sure helped me along.
September 23, 2009
I giggled so much while reading this. For those slightly twisted, this is a comic fest not to be missed. Roumieu is nothing short of a genius, albeit a bizarre one.
February 1, 2017
Poignant memoir of the life and times of the big guy. Includes helpful tips for saving the environment, avoiding wolverines and a role call of shitty forest creatures. Funny book!
November 9, 2014
Hilarious!!! Funniest book ever. Loved it. Laughed so hard I cried.
July 18, 2018
Who knew that all we ever needed to learn about life could be gleaned from the pondering of Bigfoot? This illustrated laugh out loud gem by Graham Roumieu gives readers insight into Bigfoot’s “experiences and what they teach about life, love, self so peace on Earth can finally be achieve [sic]” (1). Bigfoot recounts how to use the media to self-promote, “Me totally look awesome on camera” (4), self-improve, practice impeccable manners, how to be fit, find a mate, and deal with addiction, “Guess everybody have deep dark secret so maybe should feel no ashame. [sic] Just come out and say it. Bigfoot addicted to eat [sic] garbage” (79). This dark humored collection of joy is my new rainy day pick-me-up.
July 7, 2024
I didn’t look inside this book when I grabbed it and the story totally caught me off guard in the best way. I thought I’d read it to my niece and grabbed it purely based on the cover. 😆😆 I’d bought it to practice reading through with silly voices for her. God I wish I could relive that first reading. I was crying laughing in the park with my goofy voice ending things in vocal question marks; stunned, incredulous, and entertained. You’ll have a great time if you love some edgy offensive humor with short story jokes. (P.s. not going to read it to my niece but I did read it to my older sister and she loved it)
January 4, 2017
If you've ever wanted to know how a mythical creature might feel if it ended up going on a trash-eating binge with some raccoons it just met at a party... Or if you've ever wondered whether the king of the forest would want to smash the faces of his 'friends' if they forgot to attend his birthday party... Or if you've ever wanted to see the poops / violent rages / sexual urges of an overgrown man-ape-ish beast rendered in stunning watercolors -
Well, have I got the book for you...
Well, have I got the book for you...
February 4, 2018
I really did not like this book. After reading a few pages I knew it wasn't the book for me but continued as it was a quick read. I wanted to stop reading on more than one occasion through the book and it only took me maybe 20 minutes to read it? I didn't find it funny and the books at first ~seems~ to be written for children but it's actually at least NC-17 content, a child should not read this. It was a gross book.
February 28, 2018
I found this book on a whim from one of those little neighborhood libraries. From first glance, I knew it was something I was bound to enjoy if only because of its stupidity. What I didn't expect was how much fun it was to torture my mother with it as I read it out loud to her. Now that was a grand ole time. I didn't realize it was part of a series and now I want to find the rest of them so I can continue reading them to her knowing the entire time how much she hates it.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 188 reviews