I Want to Be Here: Conquering Anxiety at Its Source to Live With Presence and Peace at Work and Home

by Joe Coleman

I don’t want to be here. That’s the thought that leads to stress and anxiety at work and home, and it's been overstepping its bounds, standing in the way of the life you want to live. I Want to Be Here uncovers the source of our stress and anxiety, presents the key to its defeat, and shares a method for creating lasting change. The story is told from the perspective of a senior leader in the technology industry, husband, and father, who conquered the anxiety that landed him in the emergency room. In the book, new connections from neuroscience and psychotherapy combine with compelling stories to change your perspective and give you the tools needed to overcome anxiety, live with presence, and reach your full potential.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Mental Health, Psychology, Business, Science, How To

239 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 7, 2025

About the author

Joe Coleman is a business leader, author, husband, and father who climbed the ranks of major technology companies while battling anxiety. After experiencing a panic attack in his office, Joe embarked on a journey to understand and conquer the source of his anxiety, leading him to develop a powerful framework for living with presence and peace. In his debut book, "I Want to Be Here: Conquering Anxiety at its Source to Live with Presence and Peace at Work and Home," Joe shares his personal story and hard-won insights to help others break free from stress, anxiety, and self-doubt. Drawing from neuroscience, psychotherapy, and real-life experience, he offers a roadmap for those seeking peace and fulfillment in both their careers and personal lives.

Reviews

[Stacy Spencer · Rating 5 out of 5]

A life-changing book!

Instead of giving you some more flimsy coping mechanisms, Joe Coleman teaches you how to actually conquer your anxiety "at its source." Loaded with empowering advice, useful strategies, humor-infused tips, and real-life stories as examples in action, this book provides hope and inspiration in every chapter. It completely changed the way I view anxiety, and gave me the tactics and motivation I needed to start building a more confident life.

[Ayana Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

I Want to Be Here by Joe Coleman is a must-read for anyone with crippling anxiety. It’s a great read for anyone that wants to improve their mind, body, and spirit in the new year. I’m glad that I won this book in a giveaway because it was just what I needed.

There were moments as I was reading this book that felt incredibly relatable, as if Joe knew my struggles and the exact feelings that followed. “I don’t want to here” is a thought I’ve had so many times and never want to think again, and empowered with the contents of this book, I know I will get there.

I felt seen and equipped with knowledge to change my way of thinking. As a former athlete, I appreciate the many stories Coleman used to drive his point home.

I finished this book feeling encouraged, with practical action items to improve my thoughts, how to deal with stress and anxiety, and how to be more present with myself and the people around me.

If you’re looking for a book to help you change your outlook on life, seize every day, and put the desires of your heart into action, this book will grant you the tools to achieve that and more.

Now, whether you implement those tools, that’s up to you (I’m speaking to myself here).

Again, I luckily won this book in a give away and have voluntarily given my review.

[Michelle Kimber · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an excellently written nonfiction book. I thought the topic was handled well and the advice was quite helpful.

[Mark · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

Thank you to Goodreads Giveaways and to author Joe Coleman for providing me with a Kindle copy of this non-fiction work that outlines how to deal with anxiety by taking a holistic approach to address the source of anxiety rather than providing a litany of ways to cope with it. Through presenting concrete steps that a person can implement immediately and using illustrative examples from sports, politics, business, history, and the Bible, Coleman encourages the reader to be accountable for easing their own anxiety through rigorous preparation and developing an individualized plan.

Coleman’s approach to address anxiety is based on the simple mechanism that a person’s thoughts impact a person’s feelings and a person’s feelings impact a person’s actions. Though a person may not be able to control his or her feelings as those arise at the subconscious level, a person can control his or her thoughts and actions though implementing a positive, optimistic routinized process that will result in the person being present in the moment instead of rehashing past failures or worrying about future challenges. Replacing negative thoughts of “I Don’t Want to Be Here” with positive thoughts of “I Want to Be Here” founded upon logical and deeper meaning feeling purposes will results in more positive feelings and thus more constructive actions at work and at home. Those with thoughts of “I Don’t Want to Be Here” are merely observing the situation at hand with an inability to control or impact its outcome. The genesis of anxiety arises from feelings of helplessness and an inability to impact a desired outcome. Those with thoughts of “I Want to Be Here” are willing and active participants in a particular situation with a stronger ability to influence a wanted result. By being thankful for one’s blessings, reflecting daily on areas at work and home that need improvement, and continual reinforcement of the idea that positive thoughts lead to positive outcomes, a person will feel more in control of uncomfortable situations and take actions consistent with those beliefs. In addition to taking steps to think more positively, a person may also change their actions through adopting healthy habits in place of less desirable ones. Time management, elimination of non-essential tasks, delegation of less important tasks, eating healthy, routine exercise, consistent sleep habits, and being more cognizant of chemicals and drugs consumed are concrete actions that a person can take to feel better thus leading to more positive thoughts and a happier outlook on life.

For me, the two most important themes of this book are (i) the importance of taking personal responsibility for one’s thoughts and actions and (ii) the need to develop a comprehensive process focusing on preparation (with continual reassessment and refinement) to handle situations that may cause anxiety. In a society that is often apt to blame others for whatever wrong or stress a person is feeling at any time, Coleman challenges people to take ownership and accountability for their thoughts and actions. Instead of blaming others, focus on what you can do to improve your situation whether it is a change in attitude, a change in how you prepare to address a challenge, or a change in how you retroactively assess how situations were previously handled. Coleman concludes that the establishment of healthy habits, the development of effective time management skills, and the maintenance of a constant process of prioritizing important tasks and delegating less important tasks are much more effective to address anxiety than is taking solace in alcohol or prescription medication. Coleman's individualized approach should be reassessed and revised over time. My approach to reduce anxiety is making an unknown a known by comparing a task that needs to be completed with a difficult task I successfully completed in the past, working ahead, and developing a comprehensive checklist that provides a roadmap of the steps needed to complete the task. The point being that each person may have a different approach to address anxious situations, which will consistenly work if there is some coherent underlying process followed.

Coleman notes at the beginning of the book that he is in a leadership position at a technology firm. Though some strategies outlined in the book may work for employees no matter the industry or seniority, I found several of the suggestions in the book applicable only to senior people in large organizations and not the average employee. Many junior employees do not have the option to identify and disregard “nonessential tasks” like skipping “less important” meetings, to delegate less important tasks, or to control expectations of when and how e-mails and phone calls are returned. This book has some important recommended approaches on how to combat anxiety for all, but senior managers in large organizations may find the book more pertinent.

[Alexandra Corradi · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was excited to win this in a giveaway because I’m always looking for new perspectives and tips on fighting anxiety. But this book was just a tech bro humble bragging about his accomplishments and then telling you to make unrealistic changes in life (workout before work and on your lunch break? Tell your boss you just aren’t attending that pointless meeting?) then basically says fight anxiety by manifesting that you’re not miserable all the time. DNF’d halfway through. I appreciated the analogy to the lizard brain, but 1 interesting thing in the 100 pages I read was just not it.

[Dan Mickle · Rating 5 out of 5]

I genuinely enjoyed I Want to Be Here. As someone who works in performance psychology and spends a lot of time thinking about anxiety in both competitive and everyday settings, I appreciated how grounded and practical this book felt.

The author does not treat anxiety as something to eliminate or overpower. Instead, the focus is on understanding it at its source, recognizing what it is trying to signal, and building the capacity to stay present rather than escape. That shift alone is powerful. The message is not about becoming fearless. It is about becoming steady.

What stood out most to me was the emphasis on presence in ordinary moments. Not just at work. Not just in high pressure situations. At home. In conversations. In the quiet spaces where our minds tend to wander toward threat. The book repeatedly invites the reader back to awareness and responsibility in a way that feels compassionate but not indulgent.

The writing is clear without being simplistic. The concepts are accessible, yet there is depth behind them. I found myself reflecting often, especially on how much energy anxiety consumes when it is left unnamed and unexamined.

If you are looking for hype or quick fixes, this is not that. If you are willing to look honestly at your internal patterns and build a more present way of living, this book offers a thoughtful roadmap.

I am glad I read it.

[Tammy Billington · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book as my first ever Goodreads giveaway book. It’s not my typical read, but the title mentioning conquering anxiety and being present and finding peace grabbed my attention.

The book was relatable, powerful, and served as a great reminder that we need to put on our oxygen mask first before we can help others. However, even though we know prioritizing ourselves is important, we often continue to put ourselves on the back burner.

I appreciated the real world examples from history, scientific studies, sports, and a touch of the Bible. The book also educates you on the impact of stress and anxiety on the body. I saved the conclusion in the last chapter for my future reference when I need a reminder to reinforce these thoughts and ideas. I’ve also recommended this book to friends.

Thank you Jim Coleman for sharing your impactful story. Your book is a reminder that we are not alone on this journey and the challenges we face. Having a support system is key.

[Madison · Rating 4 out of 5]

*A Goodreads giveaway win!* Great book. Funny. Relatable. I was into this one.

[Myles · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book!

Im glad i read this book! Its a great book of how to overcome anxiety! If you have a lot of anxiety its a must read!

[Carol · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is helpful for those we want to live more calmly and have less angst. I enjoyed reading this book.

[Jessica Vroman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book

[Stefanie Ciro · Rating 2 out of 5]

Book 65 of 2025 was “I want to be here; conquering anxiety” by Joe Coleman. It was a @goodreads giveaway win. As an anxious person, I am always eager to rad on the subject, to learn a new coping tactic. This was not that book, I should have stopped when the author called a section of his brain lizard brain 🤪. Luckily it was a shorter read. 2 out of 5 ⭐️ .

[Kristin · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book is disappointing. It does not feel like it was written by someone who actually has experienced severe, clinical persisting anxiety. The methods applied within might help for stress and stress related symptoms but that is a far cry from actual anxiety sufferers. I'm amazed this even got published.

[Natalie Shaw · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book gives you practical life advice and insights if you deal with anxiety this book is for you.

[Pao Vilchis · Rating 4 out of 5]

Note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All of the opinions are my own and this did not affect my review in any way.

I requested a copy of this book because this past year I’ve experienced some of the worst panic attacks of my life. Even though they’re now under control, I’ve been searching for resources that might offer additional insight or comfort—something to help me understand what I’ve lived through or guide me toward healthier long-term habits. While I Want to Be Here wasn’t groundbreaking in the life-changing sense, I still found it thoughtful, practical, and surprisingly validating. I genuinely learned a lot, and I’m glad I read it.

The book is told from the perspective of a senior leader in the tech industry, who—despite outward success, stability, and a seemingly perfect life—found himself in the ER due to anxiety. From there, he reconstructs his journey combining neuroscience, psychotherapy, and personal storytelling to explain how he rebuilt his mental health and learned to live with presence. What I appreciated most is that Coleman never pretends anxiety is something you “beat” once and for all; instead, he treats it like a companion you learn to understand and coexist with.

I gave the book 4 stars. I loved that it wasn’t long, overly philosophical, or repetitive—something that happens with a lot of self-help books. It’s concise, clear, and genuinely to the point. Even though I’m not part of the corporate world and couldn’t personally relate to some of the high-stress work scenarios he described, his insights felt universal enough to apply to anyone dealing with anxiety. His reflections on the body–mind connection, awareness, and the science behind panic responses were especially helpful.

Overall, I Want to Be Here feels like a gentle companion—an accessible, honest guide from someone who has been there and understands the mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion of anxiety. It may not be revolutionary, but it’s absolutely useful, comforting, and worth the read.

[Becca · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a disclaimer, I did get a free digital copy of this book through GoodReads.

I really enjoyed the majority of this book. Having had a therapist briefly touch on the idea of remapping neural pathways, I enjoyed learning more about that process. I personally feel like remapping neural pathways is more helpful than the standard suggestion of reframing your thoughts. If you do as the author suggests and try to think the thoughts you want to associate with something going in instead of only trying to be reactive to thoughts that are coming up, I think you will have an easier time with defeating negative thoughts. But that's just my opinion.

I wasn't all about the idea of going into an extreme healthy diet, but he does at least state that while that works for him, that may not work for everyone.

As someone with a degree in psychology and a lot of personal experience with mental health disorders, the main thing that bothered me about this book was the author's assessment that people should be trying therapy before medication. I feel that medication and therapy do need to go hand in hand, but a lot of patients will need medication to deal with symptoms until they are able to work through things in therapy and possibly beyond that. I think therapy and medication should be combined rather than a one or the other.

Otherwise, I did learn a lot about how to change thought patterns and how to be more present and engaged with your own life, which is very important.

I think this is a good book to supplement your mental health journey, but as the author points out, self help alone can't resolve everything.

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author gives great descriptions on how mindset affects our feelings and our physical well-being. Instead of relying on medications to help with anxiety, his advice directs the reader to change their thoughts, which in turn changes their feelings and physical comfort. Understanding that we are each in control of our thoughts and feelings is a very important message of this book. Taking personal responsibility and not blaming outside forces and people for our stress and anxiety is very helpful.

While many of his techniques and ideas can be applied to any person‘s life, many of them can only be applied to people in executive positions where they can direct others. Most people can’t just decide to skip meetings they don’t want to attend or have other people do the work that they feel is unimportant. On the other hand, there are things in our personal lives that we can choose to stop doing if they are no longer of value.

As with many self-help books there are some really helpful pearls of wisdom here but also some things that won’t resonate with everyone or are impractical. If you like memoir styled books exploring how to make your busy life more peaceful this may be a good choice for you.

Thank you to the author for providing me a copy of his work through a Goodreads giveaway.

[Lisa Deborah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I Want to Be Here is a thoughtful, practical, and deeply relatable exploration of anxiety that speaks directly to high-performing professionals who feel trapped between success and inner unrest. Joe Coleman approaches anxiety not as a surface-level problem to be managed, but as a signal pointing to something deeper, an internal resistance to the present moment that quietly fuels stress at work and at home. His openness about his own breaking point, including an emergency-room visit, grounds the book in authenticity and trust.

What makes this book especially effective is the integration of neuroscience, psychotherapy, and lived leadership experience. Coleman translates complex concepts into clear insights and actionable tools, helping readers recognize the patterns driving anxiety and gently dismantle them. Rather than offering quick fixes, I Want to Be Here equips readers with a sustainable way to live with presence, peace, and clarity amid real-world pressures. It’s a valuable read for leaders, professionals, and parents who want to remain fully engaged in their lives without being ruled by anxiety.

[Christine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Right from the beginning of the book when the author described his personal experience having a panic attack and it sounded so much like mine, I knew I was going to get something from this book.

The author does a great job of talking about anxiety and what causes it, without getting overly technical. He also gives a lot of good and practical advice for how to deal with anxiety. And while he does talk about therapy and medication at the end of the book, the primary focus here is on how to change your mindset as well as lifestyle changes you can make to combat your anxiety. As I have really worked hard to manage my anxiety the same way, I definitely appreciated his approach.

While some of things he talked about in the book were things I already do, I definitely got some good ideas and really felt like the angle he takes on anxiety was helpful. I recommend this for anyone that struggles with anxiety.

I received an advance review copy for free and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Aimee Nerdy Auntie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thanks to Goodreads for gifting me a copy of this book. As always, my opinions are 100% my own. Now nieces and nephews… let’s get into it. I Want to Be Here by Joe Coleman is a solid book with practical advice for identifying anxiety and learning how to manage it. I appreciated that he talks about the importance of faith and exercise as part of taking care of your mental health, because those two things really can make a difference in how we feel day to day. While I didn’t necessarily learn anything brand new, the book offers some really good reminders about slowing down and paying attention to what your body is trying to tell you. Sometimes we already know what we need to do. We just need someone to remind us to actually do it. If you’re someone who struggles with anxiety and wants simple, practical guidance on listening to your mind and body a little better, this could be a helpful read.

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

I Want to Be Here is a thoughtful and engaging blend of personal storytelling and practical insight. The author—a senior technology leader, husband, and father—shares his journey through overwhelming anxiety with a level of honesty that makes the book immediately relatable. His account of reaching a breaking point and landing in the emergency room sets the stage for a deeper exploration of how stress quietly builds and how easily it can take over our lives.

What makes the book especially compelling is the way it connects neuroscience, psychotherapy, and lived experience into a clear, usable framework for change. The stories feel authentic, the explanations are accessible, and the tools offered are genuinely helpful for anyone looking to live with more presence and less fear. It’s an encouraging, perspective‑shifting read—one that earns a solid four stars.

[Beverly Guy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was grateful to receive this book through a Goodreads giveaway. It offers a simple framework for understanding and reframing situational anxiety, as well as practical suggestions for embracing an "I want to be here" mindset. I'd recommend it to others with the caveat that it's not a silver bullet, especially for those whose anxiety isn't directly related to a particular situation. (It's hard to say "I want to be here" when you simply wake up anxious and aren't sure where "here" is, but there are still helpful principles within the book's approach that can be applied.)

I appreciated that the author incorporated his faith in an authentic and natural way, as well as his conversational tone, backed by research.

[Getpast40pages · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received this as a Goodreads Giveaway. I have invested about $50,000 into the mindset and self-help industry and this book is better than some of the $1K courses I've taken on CBT. I've never highlighted so many sections in a book🤣

CBT is not new and there's nothing in this book that's wildly new to read if you're experienced in therapy and self-help, BUT the way it is described made so many concepts I already knew "click."

The studies used were also well done (and new to me!).

While I didn't resonate with most of the examples, as my anxiety is not family, money, or career-based, some of the chapters had great coping tidbits that I found so helpful for my general every day anxiety.

[Les · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was won in a Goodreads Giveaway and I’m grateful for the opportunity to have read this. Anxiety itself is such a complex thing but I enjoyed reading through this book and this author’s experience with it. While I couldn’t relate in every aspect, there were many major points where I felt understood. I think this is good for trying to learn ways to overcome anxiety rather than learning how to just live or cope with it. You must take care of you and tackle what you’re experiencing before trying to do for others.

[Daisy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I got this book through the goodreads giveaway and although I liked it, it definitely isn't isn't for everyone.

The topic of anxiety was researched pretty well, but if you are looking for coping mechanisms please skip this book. Though if you aren't and just want to learn then read this to gain more insight into anxiety and gain some pretty good life advice. (If you have diagnosed anxiety this also might not work for you.)

[Kimber Patton · Rating 4 out of 5]

“I don’t want to be here”
These words really resonated with me as they’re ones I would often think when in really stressful situations. This book brings up some food for thought and gives some pretty good advice on how to start to recondition your brain to not think that way.
I’d like to thank the author and publisher for the free copy and the advice I’ve received while reading. If you suffer from anxiety this will give you a good starting point to fight against it.

[Peggy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good book, easy to read, made me think about what leads to stress/anxiety and how to handle both.
The author writes about his life experiences with stress and anxiety plus he gives examples of situations the reader can relate to. He gives tools to help the reader make positive changes in their life, talks about having a mantra and how to live in the present.
This book is full of practical advice and any reader could benefit from reading it.

[Chris Schultz · Rating 2 out of 5]

I do like the affirmation that is in the title, but this should really be categorized as memoir or business/money. I had to DNF at 50% as I wasn't getting anything out of it. If you have a lot of video meetings at work, or have a wife that spends too much money on shampoo, then this may be for you. If not, then I would suggest moving along.

[Kayla Howell · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was not expecting to enjoy this book as much as I did! I wish that it came in physical copies because it would be perfect to gift!
The author outlines the root causes scientifically, concisely, and easy to understand. The real world examples and lessons are relatable and will stick with you for years to come.

[Noah Elliott · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding book., Super super helpful.

This gentleman was very honest and exposed a lot of his own issues and then in a very clear manner shared how he coped.

There was a lot of good takeaways in this book and it has certainly been helpful for me to better understand anxiety

I give this a very strong recommendation if you are working to deal with being over anxious.